Hello and welcome. This is my very first non-yaoi fiction and I couldn't find another more inspiring pair than Jellal and Erza to satisfy my muse's sudden crave for a straight couple.
I must warn you that the story may contain a few, tiny spoilers, if you haven't read the manga. Just for this chapter only.
I hope you enjoy it. I certainly have a lot of fun writing it.
Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail or any of the characters.
"I'm not as strong as you."
So you can't live if you're not strong?! That's wrong! Living shows how strong you are!
Jellal turned on his side, sighing. It wasn't exactly big news that he couldn't sleep. Come to think of it, when was the last time he ever slept during all those years?
He couldn't remember if there was any.
But it didn't matter. If staying awake at nights was any form of punishment, he deserved it.
"You formed a guild in order to destroy Dark Guilds. That's how you're atoning for your sins! That's what you're prepared to do!"
He chuckled bitterly, burying his face in the pillow. She had not changed at all. Seven years gone in Tenroujima and she was still the same.
Erza Scarlet. The glorious, red haired Titania. The only woman who was able to defeat 100 monsters on her own and still apologize for "taking so long".
The woman he was desperately in love with.
But that was unimportant, insignificant. His existence, let alone his emotions, were a mere hindrance to the magic world, to Erza, to everyone he knew.
Peaking through his barely closed lids, Jellal glanced at the empty room that used to be occupied by two other people.
Ultear and Meldy. His comrades. The ones who shared the same burden as him.
Ultear was gone though. She sacrificed her whole life to save them all from death. She had finally atoned for her sins and was able to rest in peace, even though her death was devastating, especially for little Meldy who loved her unconditionally. Jellal didn't blame the young, pink haired teenager when she told him she wanted to leave and travel around the world.
Now he was alone. After the Grand Magic Games and the events of Eclipse, he slipped away from the world to wallow in his self-hate all he wanted.
Fairy Tail was back on the top; no other guild dared to challenge them into popularity or power. It had been fun while he secretly was a "part" of them, simply to research about the strange dark magic coming from the Grand Stadium, but it was short lived, much like all the good things in his life.
Jellal sat up and ran a hand through his blue hair, closing his eyes shut. There was no point in trying to sleep, he mused in defeat, I might as well take a walk down the shore.
Standing up, he grabbed his black coat from the usual place he hung it, covering half of his face with the black hood. The Council was still after him, even if Doranbalt was theoretically covering up for him. It was not wise to walk around without a cover on his standing out blue hair, let alone that tattoo on his face. Only two people in the world had this stupid tattoo. Him and ... Well, he was not exactly from this world, but Mystogan had it too.
The night was warm, the summer breeze ruffling the hem of his black shirt and making his coat float in the air. It was so beautiful, so peaceful.
How a person like him, someone so drenched in sin and blood, was allowed to live in such beautiful world anymore? Jellal was unable to wrap his head around it.
The sea was close, he could smell the scent in the air. It was soothing, comforting and oddly calming.
Taking a left turn, Jellal began walking down the shore closer to the sea, watching the waves gently sloshing forwards and backwards against the blond sand. Sometimes he wished he was just a grain of sand; small, harmless.
Free. Kami knew how much he craved to be free. Free of the shackles of his sin, free to live, free to travel around the world, free to laugh, free to be happy...
Free to love Erza.
Damn. She was on his mind again. But there arose the question; did she ever leave his mind?
He deserved none of these. Not after what he did in Tower of Heaven. Not after taking Simon's life like it was nothing, or hurting Milliana, Wally… Jellal grit his teeth in agitation, kicking the sand away from his feet and into the sea.
Why was he even alive?
He started walking briskly, without thinking, his feet were taking him where he needed to go. He wasn't sure where this sudden urge had him going, but when he arrived, he understood.
It was that place where he and Erza almost…
The place hadn't changed at all; the sloppy hill was still rocky and slippery as always, those round plants that exploded into milliards of bright lighting balls still growing under the rocks. Jellal allowed himself a small smile. It was extraordinarily beautiful. But what made it more important was the little memory in his treasure box, the only memory he cherished more than his own life.
It was right after the Fairies had returned from Tenroujima, after seven years of silence. Acnologia's disaster had devastated the whole Magnolia, but after a few months, maximum a year, everybody had forgotten about the MIA mages.
Jellal never lost hope that Erza would be alive.
He was right. One of the few things he was ever right about.
There they were, on top of that hill, having this overly emotional conversation. Jellal could recall how tense Erza was while they talked. It killed him. It only meant that Erza was careful around him, her guard up and ready to strike. It meant that she didn't trust him.
It wasn't supposed to be like this. They were supposed to be friends, comrades… To share all the negative parts of their lives and find comfort in each other's company.
But then, he was there. He was the biggest part of the problem. He had gone and fucked up like this, fucked up his life…
He could recall Erza slapping him across his face. It stung. It burnt. Much like the fearsome glare she was assaulting him with.
How can you speak so cowardly?!, she had screamed.
Because I am a coward. I am afraid of what I am capable of.
"I was never as strong as you are, Erza," he muttered to himself, sitting down on the soft, warm sand. "Nor I will ever be."
Erza had grasped him from the collar, ready to beat him up. But then it happened. They had both slipped and rolled together down this very hill, ending up with Erza on her back and him on top of her.
She had cried. She had cried because she had thought she'd never see him again.
Wasn't that a reason to be happy?
Her tears always broke through his defenses. He could recall his heart nearly busting out of his chest when she cupped his face, her eyes hidden behind her long, fiery bangs. Carefully, he had placed his hand on her face, wiping away the tears he had caused. Her skin was so soft, so warm. She was blushing too, her breathing was short and shallow, puffing over his parted lips.
When she began coming closer to him, he couldn't believe it. It felt like a dream, like something… Unapproachable. Yeah. Erza was always like that. She was so perfect, so beautiful, like an angel that had fallen from the sky to make the world go round.
Jellal's world in particular.
She kept coming closer and closer and Jellal thought he'd choke on his heart. She had her eyes closed, her lips parted, waiting, her body soft and warm and then…
Then it was over.
Jellal stared at the ocean impassively, one side of his head chiding him that he'd been a pussy and not kissed the woman of his dreams, the other – the most dominant – was scolding him that he should never even dream about touching her again.
"I have a fiancé."
He knew she had seen right through his lie but it didn't matter. As long as she stayed away from him, he was okay. It painfully ripped his heart into pieces but if it was for Erza's sake, Jellal could withstand anything.
It's getting kind of late, he thought while he climbed on his feet. I should probably get back home before the sun rises.
He didn't even realize when he got home, his mind was so full of Erza; Erza smiling, Erza laughing, Erza looking at him, brown eyes shimmering with affection...
Jellal's head snapped up at the small chirping sound, his eyebrows reaching his hairline in astonishment.
A bird. There was a messenger pigeon on his bed, staring at him in anticipation.
He walked slowly to the white bird and gingerly picked it up. It flapped its wings nervously the moment he touched it but calmed down after a while, allowing him to look at the small note wrapped around its thin leg.
What was the meaning of this?
Frowning, he unwrapped the note from the bird's leg and set the creature free. Curiosity near damn killing him, he opened it hastily and read;
Mystogan. I need your help,
Jellal read the curt letter over and over, not quite believing what he was reading. Fairy Tail's master… Needed his help? Since when? And why?
Placing the letter on his bed, Jellal slowly sat down on his mattress and stared blankly at the plain, white wall opposite him.
That did not sound.
Jellal is such a kind heart after all, isn't he?
I know it is too short, though if I fit too much information in it, it may become quite tiring. I can assure you that there will be more to come.
Thanks again for reading. Can I have a review please?