A/N: Hello my dear, sweet readers! So, if you haven't read any of my stuff, or you don't remember due to the fact that I've taken so damn long to post a new multichapter fic, I'm Haelee and I will be your author! I'd like to start off by informing my Walls readers that YES, THERE WILL BE A WALLS SEQUEL. I'M STILL PLANNING IT AND IT IS CURRENTLY IN THE WORKS! :D So there's that. Secondly, there is a possibility that in the near future I may possibly make a Tumblr or Twitter account revolving around my fics for updates and more, so I'll keep you all informed, but for now you can PM me or contact me via Tumblr (klainediddyklaine) or Twitter ( diddyklaine). Lastly, I'd like to warn you now that this, much like Walls, will have an extremely awkward updating schedule. I'm not as far into writing it as I would have liked to be before posting, but I was getting tired of waiting and making those who showed interest in it waiting, so whatever, it's happening now! Also I've got finals that are coming up this week, personal life over break/holidays, musical, play, and so on. Now, if you read this, I've kept you waiting long enough! Read and enjoy (and hey, review, favorite, and follow maybe?)!
Kurt could remember just exactly how he had pictured his older self, growing up— handsome, happy, and being swept off of his feet by a gorgeous prince charming— unaware of the pain and cruelty the world could hold. In middle school, while a majority of the students went from one relationship to another, Kurt dreamed of the day he would hold another's hand. It wasn't until one day in seventh grade that he realized things may never work out the way that he wanted them to, and that was the day he realized he was gay. Before, he'd never really thought much about whom he liked, he knew there were no girls around him that grabbed his attention, but he had never thought that it may have been something other than that, until the day he finally fell for someone, and that someone was Finn Hudson- a very cute, very male person.
He'd kept his crush on Finn a secret. Not just his crush, but also his sexuality. He was teased growing up for being very feminine, but he knew that if he came out, the teasing would get worse. The only thing he feared worse than getting bullied, was losing his father, so when Kurt started freshmen year and came out, it was the single most awful moment of his life. Luckily, his father, Burt, accepted him anyway. Sure, he wasn't thrilled, but he loved Kurt all the same, and for that Kurt was extremely grateful. The Glee Club he had joined that year, which held some of the closest people to Kurt's heart, accepted him as well. And although he was bullied immensely, he was happy. That was until a new student transferred mid-school year. His name: Blaine Anderson.
Blaine Anderson immediately joined the Glee Club and became one of the small family. He was kind, dapper, social, and gorgeous, with his round, puppy dog, hazel eyes, expressive, triangular eyebrows, and dark brown curls that he slicked back to create a helmet-do, which made the chocolate locks seem black. He was, at the time, just at the same height as Kurt, and his taste in clothing was somewhere between a toddler and an old man, but the odd ensembles seemed to work quite well for Blaine.
Blaine quickly climbed to the top of the social pyramid, and soon chose one Rachel Berry, resident glee club member, to become his arm candy. Kurt was crushed, of course. Sure, Blaine had never really spoke about his sexuality, but with the way he acted and dressed Kurt had assumed he was gay, and had thought that maybe he had finally found his prince.
He figured that, due to this sad fact, Kurt's infatuation would soon fade. Despite his hopes, Kurt found himself still fawning over the other boy, and his heart still breaking every single time he spotted Blaine and Rachel together. Two years later, Kurt was a junior, and his liking towards Blaine was still very much alive.
Kurt realized Blaine was straight, how could he not when everywhere he turned Blaine was there with Rachel Berry practically perched in his lap? Somehow that didn't change how he felt, he still found himself staring after Blaine, his heart sped when the boy sang or spoke… who was Kurt kidding? Anything Blaine did caused his heart to hammer in his chest. And although he very much liked Blaine, he hated that he couldn't stop liking him.
So now, as Kurt sat across the table from the boy of his dreams, he couldn't help but think about all of this, and it brought a pain to his chest as it did every other time he thought about it. Especially when Blaine and Rachel were laughing and smiling and holding hands right across from him, as the rest of the Glee Club sat around him doing the same. Don't get him wrong, he wasn't bitter or anything, it was just that, while everyone else in Glee Club fought, cheated, broke up, and got together with someone new nearly every week, Kurt was… alone. He'd never even had his first kiss… well, when it counted that is. He had had a small fling with Brittany back in sophomore year, but that was when he had went through his "maybe-I'm-actually-straight" phase, where he tip-toed back into the closet for about a week, and joined the football team. Obviously it didn't work out, and Kurt was right back to where he had started out Freshmen year, gay and by himself, being taunted every chance the football or hockey Neanderthals could get their pudgy hands on him.
Lost in his thoughts, he didn't hear Mercedes speaking to him. She caught his attention by waving her hand in front of his face frantically, "Earth to Kurt Hummel! Damn boy, what the hell are you thinking about? You were completely out of it!" She laughed, shaking her head, "We were just talking about Sectionals and what songs we should bring up to Mr. Schue. Hopefully he'll actually listen to what we're saying and take them into consideration this time, rather than make up some damn eighties rock set list… again."
Kurt smiled sheepishly, "Sorry, I was just thinking about…" Kurt shook his head, unsure of what to say. He couldn't come up with a lie, and he wasn't about to just announce his crush on Blaine in front of all of New Directions and Blaine himself, so instead he shrugged and changed the subject, "So what have you all came up with so far?"
A few of his friends gave him looks of concern and confusion, but most of them just ignored it and went on listing what they'd come up for the set list so far. It went on like this for the rest of lunch, some listing what songs they thought best fit the set list for Sectionals, some giving Kurt curious glances as they did, as Kurt tried his best to listen to what everyone was saying without getting caught up in his thoughts.
. . . . . . .
Kurt made his way down the busy hallways of McKinley High, pushing past the crowds rushing to their lockers or to the doors to quickly escape the school. It was finally the end of the school day, and Kurt was desperately ready to leave the school and go home to procrastinate on his homework by watching reruns of America's Next Top Model on the couch, but unfortunately he had a Glee Club meeting to attend to first. As he reached his locker his eyes caught something in his peripheral vision that made him shudder— a football jersey. He let out a sigh as the single jersey clad jock walked on past him and left the now clearing hallway. Kurt was just about to put his unneeded books in his locker when Mercedes waltzed down the hallway towards him.
"Hey Mister Hummel! You coming to the meeting?" She greeted, stopping at his side and smiling widely. Mercedes had instantly become Kurt's best friend in freshmen year. You'd think that after her having an awkward crush on him, and busting the windshield of his car upon figuring out that he hadn't reciprocated the feelings, the two would have been their fallout. But after he came out, their bond became ever stronger. Mercedes had been the first person Kurt had actually come out to, though a majority of the Glee Club had guessed his sexuality upon first meeting him. Kurt was happy to have Mercedes in his life, though. She was the best friend anyone could ask for. Understanding, loyal, fashion savvy, and a major diva, all qualities Kurt found equally amazing, and many he shared.
"Of course, 'Cedes, I've just got to gather my stuff up," he replied, switching the unneeded books out with the ones he did need for his homework before closing his locker door and sending a smile her way. "Shall we?" He asked, holding his arm out for her.
Intertwining their arms, she smiled and nodded, "Lead the way!" With that, the two friends headed toward the choir room, as they approached the room, Kurt came to a halt, causing Mercedes to stop as well and send him a questioning look.
"Shit! I forgot my English book in my locker," Kurt swore.
"Why don't you just get it after Glee? You'll have time to then," Mercedes supplied, but Kurt shook his head quickly at the idea.
"Because then I have to stay longer than necessary in this hell-hole, and I'd rather just go straight to the door after the meeting," Kurt replied, shaking his head, "I'm just going to go now, tell Mr. Schue I'm running a little late if he comes before I get back, okay?"
Mercedes nodded, "Will do, I'll save you a seat beside me. See you in a few!"
Kurt nodded before turning around and rushing back to his locker, sighing as he stopped in front of it, and opened it before rummaging through his locker in search of his English book. Out of the corner of his eye he spotted another football, but unlike last time he paid no mind to it, too focused on finding his somehow missing book.
"Looking for this Lady Hummel?" A deep voice asked behind him. The voice caused a fearful shudder to ripple down his spine as Kurt spun around, meeting the owner of the voice.
Behind him stood his number one tormentor, David Karofsky, holding up Kurt's English book in his meaty hands, an evil grin pinned on his lips. He stood there by himself, which made Kurt feel a little bit better, until his eyes slid over to the opening of the hallway and were greeted with a large portion of the football team. Kurt's eyes went wide with fear, but he quickly replaced the fear with his best poker face.
"Are you trying to read again, David?" Kurt quipped, "I figured after the last time you tried you'd have just given up by now."
Karofsky's grin morphed into a scowl, "You think you're funny, don't you Hummel?"
"I find myself hilarious," Kurt grinned, "Clearly others don't quite… understand my sense of humor," he added, motioning towards the group of jocks.
"Yeah, well I hope you find this hilarious," said Azimio from the front of the jocks, pulling a slushy from behind his back.
Wow, how did I not notice that? Should've gotten out while I had the chance. Kurt thought to himself. Before he could move, the group had closed around him, and suddenly slushies were flying in from all sides, soaking him to the bone in an array of colorful, corn syrupy, ice. Azimio and Karofsky high fived one another and several of the jocks followed suit as they all laughed and left a dripping wet Kurt.
Kurt stood in the same place for several seconds before shuffling over to his abandoned book on the floor across the hall, and sighing. By now the janitor's would have closed all of the bathrooms except the teachers and the locker room restrooms, and he had no key to get into the teachers restroom, and with football practice after school, there was no way he was going to the locker room for fear of running into the team once again. He could of course go ask Mr. Schuester for his key and change into his spare clothes in his locker, but then he'd have to sit at school for another hour in soaking wet undergarments.
Opting out of that rather painful option, Kurt decided it was best to just head home now, but before he could do that he decided he would stop by the choir room to inform Mr. Schuester of his change of plans. He shuffled to the choir room quickly, watching everywhere for any signs of the football team, and sighing in relief when he made it to the choir room safely, but as he walked into the room he instantly regretted it. Everyone in the room, who before were focused on listening to Mr. Schuester talk about Sectionals, turned and stared wide-eyed at Kurt, who obviously hadn't really thought through the fact that he was about to walk into a room of his closest friend, soaked to the bone in rainbow colored slush.
Before he could utter a word a jumble of voices interrupted him. He couldn't exactly make anything out, so instead he stayed planted in the doorway, blinking wildly, mostly because of the slush that was dribbling its way into his eye, but also because he was a bit overwhelmed. Mr. Schuester, who had noticed Kurt's expression, yelled for them to quiet down and got up to better access Kurt.
"Kurt, what happened? Are you okay?" He asked, worry evident in his voice.
Kurt nodded, "I'm fine. Just ran into Karofsky and his pack of gorillas," he explained, wiping the slush from his eye.
"Wait, Karofsky did this?" Finn chirped from the back of the room.
"Him along with a large portion of the football team, yes," Kurt supplied.
"But, the jocks haven't been doing anything to us since freshmen year!" Rachel exclaimed from her place beside Blaine, who wore a pained look on his face.
Rather than focusing on Blaine's expression Kurt scoffed at Rachel's comment, losing whatever patience he had left. He was cold, wet, and aggravated, and he just wanted to go home and clean up. "Maybe not to you, the Princess of McKinley High or the rest of her "besties" in glee club who were deemed okay after you clawed your way to the top of the social pyramid, but due to the fact that I'm not using your boyfriend's popularity as a safe house, I'm on my own. I mean being the only gay kid at McKinley High School, well that has its perks you know! I mean, sometimes I get slushies down my back, sometimes I get shoved into the lockers… oh! But you wanna know what the best part is? When I get thrown in the dumpster. Yeah, that one is my very favorite. Sometimes it's one person from the hockey or football team, sometimes it's most of the hockey or football team, and sometimes when they're feeling a little bit spunkier, both of the teams get together and do it! Man, does my gayness really bring people together. Now, unlike everyone else in this room, I've got rainbow slush dripping into my underwear, so if you'll allow it Queen Berry, I'd love to go home!"
Taken aback Rachel nodded slowly, "Uhmm—uh oh-okay."
With that, Kurt spun on his heel and left the school, leaving the rest of New Directions in shock. It was no secret that Kurt wasn't the biggest fan of Rachel, but over the years they'd learned to work together, and actually became semi-friends. Kurt blowing up on Rachel was… surprising to say in the least.
"Damn, he got you, Berry," Puck proclaimed.
"Shut up Noah!" She cried from the front of the room, burying her face in the crook of Blaine's neck as tears began streaking down her face. "I didn't know anything was still going on with Kurt! I would have helped if I had!"
Santana rolled her eyes, "Oh can it, Hobbit. Even if you had known, you wouldn't have done anything. Or anything you would have done wouldn't have helped anyway. We all know you're not nearly as caring as you think you are, so stop with the crocodile tears and let's move on. Not only that but, despite what you think, you're not really that powerful. The only reason the jocks let us off the hook was because of Blaine's social level, and even that can't help Kurt when he practically throws sparkles at people in the hallway."
"I may hate Santana, but even I have to admit she's right," Puck piped in, "The only way we're gonna get this to stop is if we create a protection program for him."
"Seriously Noah, that's your best idea? Follow Kurt around like his personal babysitters to fend off all of the jocks. I'm sure Kurt would just love for us all to follow him around all day," Quinn replied from her seat beside Finn.
"Why don't the boys on the football team just bring it up?" Tina asked, "I mean, maybe if you guys stuck up for him they'd leave him alone?"
"Or maybe they'd kill us and bury our bodies in the football field," Puck retorted.
"Guys, guys! Calm down. Listen, the only way we're going to be able to help Kurt is to make sure he knows that we are all there for him. Like Puck said, if you guys just stick beside him, he'll always have someone to help him in these kinds of situations, and he'll also know he has friends he can count on, okay?" Mr. Schuester said. He waited for his students to agree before clapping his hands dismissively, "Now back onto the task at hand! Sectionals!"
. . . . . . . .
Kurt was steaming, Rachel Berry had literally struck a nerve, or rather struck it, dug it out, and proceeded to bite, kick, and stomp on it. Kurt grumbled curses as he drove his way home, entered his house, took off his now sticky, sopping clothes, put them in the washer, and took a quick shower. When he exited the shower he felt a little bit better, and a bit calmer. He almost felt a little bad for chewing Rachel out, but he couldn't find it in himself to regret it. He was tired of Rachel Berry thinking she was the Princess and savior of the New Directions.
It was about time Rachel was kicked off of her high horse and told what people really thought of her, but with her and Blaine being the "leaders" of glee, and known as two of McKinley High coolest students, no one had it in them to admit how they felt.
Since freshmen year, Rachel Berry had changed drastically. After getting herself a popular man and earning a spot in the popular group, Rachel had went from her reindeer sweater, plaid skirt, knee high socks and loafer wearing days, and transformed into a life-sized Barbie doll, complete with fashionable but tight fitting tops, too short for comfort skirts, and ridiculously high pumps. While Kurt could agree with her new found fashion sense, he couldn't agree to her new personality change, which was exactly what you'd think it would be hanging with a bunch of airheaded, rude, daddy's girls. Rude, crude, and ten times dumber than your average person. Sure, in glee club she was the same Rachel Berry everyone knew and hated, but everywhere else, other than on the weekends when she actually did hang out with the members, she was the new Rachel.
Kurt sighed, and shook the thoughts from his head. Instead of thinking about how much Rachel got on his nerves, he'd get dressed in some comfy clothes, head downstairs, and watch the episodes of America's Next Top Model he had recorded from the marathon that had been on a few days prior which he'd missed due to shopping with Mercedes and Tina.
Heading downstairs he grabbed some Chex Mix from the kitchen before plopping down on the coach and clicking on the television. Burt was supposed to be working late tonight, meaning he wouldn't be home for dinner and would most likely run to McDonald's on his way home, so Kurt was taking a night off. Rather than fixing dinner like he usually did, he'd instead snack on random junk food all night and regret it the next day.
Just as he began the first episode of ANTM the doorbell ringing made him jump. With an aggravated sigh he paused the TV and sat his bowl of Chex Mix on the coffee table. He cringed at his reflection in the window, noticing that he was in a plain white tee shirt, and a pair of black sweats. Approaching the door he yanked it open and plastered a fake smile on his face, before looking at the guest, "Hello—oh?"
There at his door stood Blaine Anderson. At first Kurt blinked rapidly and rubbed his eyes, just to make sure he wasn't imagining it, and sure enough, it was in fact Blaine.
"Blaine?" Kurt greeted unsurely, "What are you doing here?"
Blaine smiled sheepishly, "Hey Kurt. I uh—I wanted to see how you were… doing," he finished lamely, nervously tapping his fingers against his thigh.
Kurt blushed and ducked his head down to hid it from the boy on the other side of the door before moving aside and motioning for Blaine to come in, "Oh uhm… Well thanks, Blaine. I'm fine," he replied as he motioned for Blaine to sit on the couch. Kurt took a seat in his father's chair and turned towards the couch to better converse with his visitor. "I'm sorry about… in glee. I shouldn't have been such an ass to Rachel," Kurt apologized sincerely. Though he didn't feel bad towards Rachel herself, he did feel bad for Blaine. He vaguely recalled taking a crack at Blaine in his little rant and another wave of regret crashed over him. "I also didn't mean what I said back there, about you being some safe house… or whatever. Rachel does really like you, so do I—does the rest of the glee club."
Blaine, whether he had noticed Kurt's slip-up and chose to ignore it, or not, said nothing about it, "No, it's fine. I know you were just pissed. I'm sorry about Rach though; she can be a bit… naïve and lost in herself sometimes."
"You shouldn't apologize for your girlfriend's actions, it's not your fault Rachel is a selfish—" Kurt caught himself and shook his head, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't say that."
"No, no. I get it, I do. You're angry, you need to let out your frustration, might as well be with me since I'm here, right?" Blaine smiled at him before it faltered and he shifted awkwardly, "Honestly, Kurt… I feel bad. I've seen some of the stuff those—jerks have done to you in the past but I haven't done anything. I've only seen a little bit of it, had I know it was worse I definitely would have stepped in. It's just, obviously I'm not the toughest or biggest guy out there, and while that's no excuse… I just…" Blaine stumbled over his words before shaking his head, "I'm so sorry, Kurt."
Kurt's heart ached for the boy across from him. There was absolutely no reason for him to feel bad, yet he did. Sure he'd saw some stuff go down and hadn't done anything, but at least he'd noticed, and apologized now, instead of everyone else who either hadn't noticed or just didn't mention it or attempt to step in.
"Thank you," Kurt whispered, looking up at Blaine. His eyes stared into the other boy's deep hazel ones, and he smiled weakly, "For saying something, for noticing, for apologizing. At least someone did, right?" After a few silent moments of raw eye contact Kurt shook his head and sighed, "Anyway, it's fine. I don't expect to be saved from my hell, but… at least I had someone to talk to about it. That's all I really needed— someone to notice."
Blaine nodded, "If you ever need someone to talk to—about anything at all—don't hesitate to come to me, Kurt. I'll always be there to listen. I'd love to help you out," he smiled nervously up at Kurt, his eyes shining with an emotion Kurt couldn't quite place, but as soon as it was there, Blaine was shaking his head and clearing his throat and the look was gone, "Anyway, I should get going, but yeah. If you ever just need someone, feel free to come to me, okay?" Kurt nodded as Blaine got up, and the two walked to the door together.
"See you later Blaine, and thanks again… for everything," Kurt smiled, about to shut the door, but Blaine's arm shot out an held it in place.
"Promise me Kurt, okay? Promise you'll come to me if things get worse or if you need someone. Don't do anything stupid, just come to me. Do you promise?" Blaine asked, worry evident in his voice.
Kurt nodded, "I promise."
And with that Blaine was walking to his car, and Kurt was shutting the door. He watched out the window as the boy he was head over heels for, drove out of his driveway. As the car left his sight Kurt let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding.