I felt trapped. I was panicking, my head was spinning, and everything was so hot. I knew it was wrong. I knew I was sick for liking it. I knew that whatever Shirosaki-sensei was, it wasn't human. I had to escape his mind games… I forced myself out of this haze, expecting to still be in his arms.
But when I woke I was in bed. I was in my bed, clothed in my pajamas. It was just like every other morning, except for the pain in my neck.
Fear moved my body to the bathroom. I stumbled over some of Yuzu's toys, noticing dully that it was dark. I made it to the bathroom, flicked on the lights and fell to the floor. Shit, it's too bright.
I got up, slamming my fist into the light switch and putting out those god damned lights. I froze, catching my breath as I listened for any sign of wakened family. I heard nothing, nothing but my father snoring. Everyone was still sleeping.
I found the sink, and when I did, took a fierce grip on it. I looked into the mirror and all I saw was what was supposed to be there; me. I smiled, relieved, misjudging what had just happened to be nothing more than a nightmare.
And that's when I saw them.
Peeking out from beneath my upper lip, blending in with my joyful smile, were fangs. I nearly screamed, stopping myself when I thought of my sleeping sisters. I heard a crack, looked down and found that the sink had crumbled beneath my grasp. My hands were coiled in like a monster's, black talons replaced my nails.
"What the hell… am I?" I whispered to myself.
I hadn't expected to be answered. "You're a creature of the night. Or rather, you will be."
I spun to face the intruder, not at all surprised to find that it was Shirosaki-sensei leaning against the doorframe.
"Calm down my boy, calm down." He approached me, but instead of tensing up like I wanted to, I found it to be a better option if I loosened my muscles. "There, see? Nothing to be scared of."
"Get away from me."
Shirosaki-sensei chuckled. He put his hand on my shoulder, and I instantly threw it off.
"I mean it! Don't touch me, Shirosaki-sen-"
"Oh please, formalities are so annoying." He leaned in to my ear. "Call me Shiro."
I shuddered, his breath lingering on my ear, pins and needles sliding down my neck. I pushed him away again. "I shouldn't be calling you anything but monster. Get out of my house."
Shiro stepped back, a hand over his heart, feigning hurt. "Oh, Ichi, those words hurt! I'm not a monster…" Shiro grinned. "…I'm simply ravenous for you."
"You want nothing more than my blood!" I growled. "Don't lie and say you want me! You're a monster! A bloodthirsty, evil and untrustworthy monster!"
"Ichi-nii?" Yuzu called me. Shit, she was going to see Shiro! "Ichi-nii! Who are you talking to?"
"See you in class, Ichigo." Shiro vanished just as Yuzu turned on the lights. I prepared myself for the shock of brightness, but nothing came. I glanced into the mirror again. No fangs, no claws, no… nothing. Nothing but the two marks Shiro left on my neck.
"Ichigo, what are you doing out of bed so early?" Karin complained.
"Couldn't sleep. Had to pee. Now give me some privacy!" I thought up and lied. Normally lies didn't come to me so quickly, but this one rolled off my tongue even before I had thought of it.
Karin's eyes widened. She covered Yuzu's eyes, dragging her from the bathroom and shutting the door as she left. I sighed, exhaustion finally creeping up on me. I flushed the toilet and washed my face before I shut off the lights and returned to my room.
That's where I lay in bed, unable to sleep, for the next three hours.
I told Ichigo and Abarai that lunch time detention would be postponed. I wasn't in the mood to sit through forty minutes of having the object of my desire right in front of me but being unable to act because Abarai would be watching.
No. I wasn't in the mood for teasing at all.
I wanted Ichigo so badly that I even visited him at his house last night. It was outside of my plan, but I just couldn't help it.
Look at yourself, Shirosaki, you've become desperate for a piece of junk food. But Ichigo meant more to me than that…
"Shiro," someone called. I looked up at him, Ichigo. "May I go to the washroom?"
"No. There's three minutes left of class, surely you can wait until the bell rings. Even then, why would you need to go to the bathroom with your books?"
Ichigo glared at me, and somewhere inside I felt… disappointed. I didn't want him looking at me like that. I wanted him smiling, laughing, bowing, obeying…
"Please take you seat." I instructed. Ichigo turned around, walked back to his desk and sat down.
Moments later the bell rang. Everyone but Ichigo filed out, and everyone but Ichigo paid me no attention. Ichigo didn't take his eyes off me for a second. I saw the way his hand twitched, eager to hit something, probably me.
After minutes of silence, he asked, "What do you want with me?"
"I want you." I answered quickly.
And he replied just as fast. "Stop lying. You want my blood-"
"Yes!" I stood. "I want you, your blood, your beautiful smile… I want to stare into your eyes. I want to run my fingers through your hair." We were getting closer. I couldn't stop myself from moving towards him. "I want to kiss you, to hold you, and to protect you. I want to hear your laughter. I want you."
Ichigo looked down, away from my eyes. I brought my fingers to his cheek; he made no move to push me away. I ran my fingers over his cheek, his skin feeling heavenly against my fingertips.
"And…" he whispered softly. "…what about my heart?"
Ichigo took me by surprise, just as he took my hand and placed it on his chest.
"I know it's your spell, I know they're only words, but I can't deny that I have feelings for you. I've tried pushing you away, I've tried forgetting you, but I've fallen right into your trap."
He started crying.
Why-? No, never mind, I knew the answer. Shiro had gotten to me, he'd won. My own logic had been cast aside, all because of him. I wanted his touch. I wanted to feel his skin, his kisses, his pull, his push, his everything. I wanted him on me, I wanted him loving me, and I wanted it all now.
I was crying because I knew this was all an illusion. He didn't love me. How could he? I was nothing more than his next meal. Then I was to be forgotten, dead, left in the pile of all his other victims.
"I love you."
But then why the hell did he say that?
"I want to be your heart. I want to be your everything, just as you are mine."
"Who are you?"
"No! I want a straight answer, not your name."
"I go by the name Hichigo Shirosaki. I'm two hundred and thirty four years old. For the past three months my life as a hunter has been paused because of a particularly delicious prey." I listened closely, not pausing for any thoughts. He started circling me. "His name was Ichigo Kurosaki, and he was fucking perfect. Go straight to school, go straight home, or go to the music store and use the most populated roots, make sure to be home before seven. I couldn't touch him, I couldn't even get close. He was smart, but by becoming his teacher it meant I was able to see him five days a week. I waited for a long time, but eventually I was able to call him into detention."
Shiro now loomed over me, my back to the desk, his hands pinning me down.
"And that's where I made him mine."