To Ship the Impossible Ship Part 3
Arizona x Leah
Disclaimers in Part 1
After another night on the couch and a surprisingly comfortable breakfast with Callie and Sofia, Arizona had decided that it would be best for everyone to find a house of her own and as she had the day off she decided to start her search.
She had looked at a few houses before she found herself standing once more outside of Leah's door. The blonde hadn't been in to work the previous two days but when Arizona called to check on her, she didn't answer and she was now officially worried.
She knocked several times with no answer. Thinking the blonde had recovered and gone to the hospital, she called Miranda Bailey.
"She's not here again today and she didn't call in," Miranda said shortly, "and she better have a good damned reason."
"That's not like her," Arizona said with concern. "You know how enthusiastic she is about her job."
"That's for damned sure," Miranda snorted, "but she's been more out of it than usual for the last couple of months so who knows."
"Damnit," Arizona muttered. "She's probably still recovering from the flu. She's friends with Edwards has she said anything?"
"'Not to me and even if she's still sick she needs to call it in."
"Okay," Arizona frowned. Hadn't anybody thought to check on Leah? She hung up and was about to leave when she heard something from inside the apartment. She knocked again and then heard the noise again. Her heart stopped as she realized it was a moan.
"Leah! Leah, its Arizona. Open the door." No answer, then a soft thud.
"Shit," Arizona swore desperately. She quickly called for an ambulance, relieved the intern found an apartment relatively close to the hospital.
It took less than fifteen minutes for the ambulance to arrive and Arizona cringed when they broke in the door but seeing a pajama clad Leah passed out on the living room floor wiped out the guilt she felt.
"Oh my God," Arizona cried and pushed her way past the EMT's to kneel next to the fallen woman. She didn't need to even touch Leah to know she was running a dangerously high fever. Sweat was pouring down flushed cheeks and the heat was palpable.
"Please Dr. Robbins, we need to get her to the hospital. We'll take care of her."
Arizona reluctantly stepped aside as they lifted her onto the gurney. "I'm coming with you."
"How is she?" Arizona quickly asked Cristina when she left Leah's room.
"She's completely out of it but stable," Cristina answered in her rather blunt way. "She was borderline pneumonia, completely dehydrated and had a fever of 104, not to mention severe exhaustion. We've got her on fluids and some heavy antibiotics so, barring infection she should be able to go home in a couple of days, but she was a mess. Quite frankly if you hadn't found her when you did…"
"She had the flu, didn't she have anybody checking on her?" Arizona was shocked that someone could be incredibly sick without anyone checking and she was disgusted with herself for not staying when she'd seen how sick she was before.
"No. Edwards had talked about it, but she's still working with Grey on her project and she was afraid she'd get sick and I guess nobody else thought about it."
"Wow," Arizona said, appalled by the lack of compassion from the people she worked with and herself.
"Well Murphy hasn't really endeared herself to a lot of people," Cristina mentioned.
She did to me, Arizona thought sadly. Cristina walked away and Arizona slipped into Leah's room. She pulled up a chair next to the bed and took Leah's hand. For the longest time she didn't say anything, she just watched Leah, pretending she was only sleeping. She looked so peaceful, especially without the soulful dark eyes watching her sadly. Arizona had been aware of the looks Leah often gave her. Especially when she was with Callie, but she'd always forced herself to pretend she didn't because that would remind her of the callous way she'd treated her. It would remind her of how softly Leah had touched her as if she worshipped her. It would remind her of the way she would wake up to find Leah's eyes on her, full of an emotion Arizona wouldn't allow herself to define. Then when Leah realized Arizona was awake, she would close off her expression and quickly leave, afraid of pushing her too far and Arizona simply let her.
Arizona sighed. Cristina was right. Leah Murphy had certainly earned herself a reputation for being pushy, arrogant and often times just plain obnoxious. She came across as a perpetual suck up but it only took minutes of actually talking alone with the young resident to realize that it was all just a cover. Every time Leah pushed, or boasted or tried to suck up to an Attending, it was because she had absolutely no faith in herself. She fancied herself in love anytime anyone spoke nicely to her or dated her because she was so lonely and uncertain and Arizona had ignored all of that because she didn't want to see it. And apparently nobody else at the hospital wanted to see it either.
"I am so sorry Leah," she whispered as she pushed a stray curl out of still closed eyes. "I should never have left you alone. You needed someone to take care of you. You needed me and as many times as you were there for me, I should have been here for you."
Arizona wiped away a tear that escaped as she pictured the woman suffering alone in her apartment for nearly a week, thinking nobody even cared.
Suddenly she needed to see Leah's eyes, to see she was going to really be alright. "Leah, please, wake up," she urged quietly, releasing a sigh of relief when Leah's eyes fluttered open.
"Arizona?" she rasped weakly, the glazed eyes spoke of just how sick the woman was.
"I'm here," she replied with a warm smile, gently cupping a flushed cheek. "You're going to be fine."
"No you're not. This is a hallucination," Leah muttered closing her eyes. "The real Arizona doesn't care enough about me to be here. You're merely a manifestation of my symptoms."
"No," Arizona smiled sadly. "I'm not and I do care. More than I should."
"I wish you were real though," Leah continued weakly, as if Arizona hadn't spoken. "If you were here, it would mean you cared and then I could tell you…" she moaned and began to cough.
"Shh, Leah, don't talk," Arizona's heart broke but she was desperately afraid to hear the revelation the confused woman was about to make.
"I would tell you that I love you like I've never loved anyone else ever," Leah managed when the coughing stopped. "I'd tell you that you that I love the way you look at me, like I was important to you. I love the way you touched me like you wanted me, even if you didn't mean it. I would tell you I love your big heart and your brilliant mind and god, you're so beautiful…" her voice faded as she once again lost consciousness, leaving Arizona reeling from the heartfelt, shaky and somewhat babbling declaration.
"Oh Leah," she whispered and tried to fight the tears that sprung to her eyes. How had she been so incredibly blind, not just to Leah's feelings but to her own?
"When you're better, you and I are going to have a very long and overdue conversation." She stood and after a split second hesitation, she leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on the still burning forehead.
Leah opened her eyes, unsure of what woke her. She was startled to recognize the ceiling of the hospital.
"Oh good you're awake."
Leah turned her head at the unexpected voice and was surprised to see Arizona sitting next to her bed in the blue scrubs that always made her eyes so much prettier. Leah shook her head at the inappropriate though as she struggled to sit up.
"What…why am in the hospital?" she asked sleepily and suddenly she remembered a weird dream that Arizona had come to see her and was even crying.
Adding to Leah's confusion, Arizona smiled gently and picked up her hand. "You were really sick."
"I just had the flu," Leah argued. "How long have I been here anyway?"
"Two days," Arizona soothed. "I stopped by your apartment Thursday afternoon and you were passed out on the floor, very near pneumonia and severely dehydrated. You told me you were taking care of yourself," she scolded.
"I guess I just didn't feel like getting out of bed to fix something to eat," Leah shrugged, wondering why Arizona had even stopped by.
"Yes and that, along with the 80 hours a week you've been working are why you passed out when you finally did get up," the older woman chided. "Oh and sorry about your apartment door. I had someone go out today to fix it."
Leah was growing even more confused. "What about my door?"
"I…"Arizona felt her cheeks heat out of guilt and embarrassment. "You didn't answer the door but then I heard you fall so I called the paramedics and they kind of broke down your door to get in."
Only the fact that she was still feeling fuzzy kept her from dwelling on that revelation. "Okay well, thanks for finding me." She closed her eyes in a clear dismissal as Arizona's compassion was beginning to hurt her.
"Why didn't you call someone?" Arizona asked, ignoring Leah's not so subtle hint. "Bailey said you didn't call in yesterday or the day before."
"I did," Leah said with confusion. "I called Stephanie and told her I was really sick and wouldn't be in. She said she'd tell Bailey and try and come check on me."
Arizona swallowed her sadness and the flash of anger at herself and everyone at the hospital for letting things come to this. "That was three days ago Leah. Nobody heard from you since."
"Oh," Leah frowned as the reality of her situation hit her and filled her with a sad sort of bitterness. "Well if they had checked, they would have discovered that I was at home in bed, not off in Vegas or somewhere."
"Why didn't you call me?" she asked quietly just as she had once before, but this time Leah wasn't crying, in fact she didn't look like she felt much of anything and that worried Arizona more than if tears were streaming down her face."
Leah snorted and turned away from the probing eyes that always had her falling at Arizona's feet. "I didn't think you'd….I didn't want to interrupt your time with your wife and daughter," she muttered.
I didn't think you'd come. Arizona had no doubt that's what Leah had been about to say and that was surprisingly painful.
"I shouldn't have let you send me away before," she replied sincerely. Arizona reached out and took Leah's chin, forcing her gaze back to her own. "And I should have checked back on you sooner and I'm so sorry I didn't." Unconsciously her thumb slid across full lips she'd come to know so well and she wasn't oblivious to the resulting tremor.
"Despite what you think…what I've made you think, I do care for you Leah and the thought that you felt you had to suffer alone instead of calling me…it hurts me."
As her head cleared, Leah began to remember the way she'd fallen for Arizona's tenderness before only to be kicked in the heart as soon as Callie came running and she pulled her chin out of Arizona's oh so soft fingers.
"I'm sure it does," she said with patent disbelief, "but you don't have to feel guilty. You saved the day so thanks for finding me and you can return to your wife now."
Arizona rolled her eyes. Leah Murphy was such a drama queen some times and she looked forward to her reaction to what she was about to say. She got to her feet.
" , I have a surgery in an hour that I need to get ready for but just so you know, Callie and I are no longer together." With that announcement, she bent over the bedrail and dropped a lingering kiss on Leah's lips. She finally pulled back, smirking at the young woman's shocked expression.
"Cristina says you're going home today so I'll be back in after my surgery to take you home and then we are going to have a chat."
Leah could do nothing but watch the blonde leave her room and wonder if she was still delirious.
"So. Ready to go?"
Leah jerked awake at the sudden question. And feeling an odd sense of déjà vu, she was once again confused to see Arizona standing there, although this time she was in slacks and a silver blouse, looking ridiculously beautiful.
"What?" She finally asked.
"I told you I was taking you home and Cristina told you the same thing two hours ago. I brought you a change of clothes so get your lazy ass up and get dressed."
Leah just stared at the smirking surgeon, having no idea what was going on. She only barely remembered Yang coming into talk to her because her thoughts had all been on Arizona. She'd just dreamed Arizona's visit hadn't she? And if it wasn't a dream, did that mean that Arizona had really said she and Callie broke up? Did it mean she really kissed her?
"I…what?" she asked again.
Arizona suppressed a laugh and had to admit she was feeling rather proud of herself for shocking the occasionally babbling intern into speechlessness.
"You've already forgotten? Maybe you aren't well enough to go home," Arizona replied casually, pretending to leave the room.
"No. I want to go home, but…you were here before?" Leah asked tentatively, afraid despite herself.
Arizona's smirk eased into a sad little smile and she stepped next to Leah's bed. She gently palmed Leah's cheek, hating the wariness in Leah's eyes, knowing that the painfully vulnerable woman feared she was going to be rejected yet again.
"Yes, I was here before," she replied kindly. "And yes I told you I was taking you home and yes, I kissed you."
"That's what we're going to talk about if you ever decide to get dressed so we can get you back home. Now, do you need some help?"
Even though Arizona had seen every inch of her numerous times, the thought of the somewhat intimidating woman seeing her now made her blush. "No, I've got it."
"Good," Arizona smiled, seeing the blush. "I'll get the wheelchair and then we'll get you discharged." She started to leave but then turned back. "You're not alone anymore."