A/N: Hi everyone! I've been wanting to do a Bella/Jasper story for quite some time. This starts out in New Moon, four months after the accident at Bella's party, and Jasper still feels intensely guilty. As much as I love the wolves, they aren't too big a part of this as this is just based off the Cullens. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it!
Disclaimer: Jasper Hale… ha, don't I wish that I'd come up with him myself. But I didn't.
Jasper POV: I was sick of being cooped up in this house, only leaving to hunt. Alice was driving me insane, skimming through her fashion magazines, asking me what I thought. Truth be told, I really don't give a flying hoot about all the fashion garbage. But I had to be understanding. She was grieving, the entire family was, and it's all my fault.
Bella Swan. The small, clumsy human girl that had worked her way into every one of our frozen hearts. We hadn't wanted to leave her, but Edward said it was the best way to keep her safe. I'm never going to look at him again without seeing that same look of disappointment on his face. The one he had the night I'd almost killed Bella. However, I suppose that I deserve to live the pain of remembering. That's the least I deserve for what I've done to this family.
Carlisle's emotions were heartbreak that was almost constant. He'd lost a member of his family, and was slowly losing the others as well. His face always concealed the feelings. Esme, sat on the couch and dry sobbed at anything that reminded her of Bella, or sometimes it would be about how she missed the closeness of our family. Emmett had lost the amusement in his eyes, he rarely ever laughed, Rosalie was even more bitter because of Emmett's sadness, but it was nothing compared to Edward.
After he left Bella, he just came to this house and shut himself in his room, only leaving it when he was absolutely starving. He always had an empty look in his eyes, his emotions were blank, broken, anger, pain, sadness. That's all I ever got. He'd smashed the piano we got him to try and cheer him up, and wouldn't open up a single book, he often sat around hoping he'd solidify. We always made him move again before it happened.
Last week though, we found out just how broken he was though. He'd come down the stairs and for the first time in months, he spoke, but it wasn't what any of us expected him to say.
"I'm leaving," he'd simply stated. "I'm going to travel South America for a while. I don't know how long I'll be gone or if I'm going to come back. I just need a way to clear my head." When we tried to protest, he'd waved us away. "I'll call every so often," he promised. "I just need this time to myself."
Esme had begged and pleaded for him to stay, but he'd simply hugged her and walked out the door like it was nothing. It broke her, he was her very first son in this family. We'd spent all night trying to console her, but nothing worked.
Nobody else was angry with Edward, only me. I didn't let anyone else know it. Edward had developed a habit of running away from difficult situations. Granted, it was my fault all this had happened, but it wasn't fair to those who loved him.
My mind began to wonder to Bella. How is she feeling right now? Does she still love Edward, does she miss us? Or has she moved on and decided she's better off without us?
Worst of all does she hate me? I tore her relationship apart, took the people she loved away from her… how could she not hate me?
She needs to know how sorry I am. Somehow, some way I need to get to her and tell her. But we all promised Edward we'd never set foot in Forks as long as she was living there. We needed to stay away.
But Edward also promised Bella he'd never leave her and he broke that promise. Promises are always made to be broken. For the past few months, I've felt like there's been some sort of tether, pulling me back to Forks. Maybe it was because I so badly wanted to fix things all this time, and now I was going to.
I quickly packed my bag and wrote a note for Esme, and Carlisle, saying that I would simply be back soon. Just as I was about to depart through the window I heard Alice say, "Jasper, I just had a vision and you can't go to Forks."
Whipping around to see her standing in the doorway looking panicked I narrowed my eyes. "Why? Are you going to threaten me and say you'll tell Edward if I do?"
She was getting angry now too. "No! Of course not Jazzy, just… you can't go! Please you have to listen to me!"
"I'm sick of doing things just because you tell me to! I want to be my own person for once in a hundred years, Ally, and it isn't up to you! I'm going to Forks, whether you like it or not!"
Alice would have been red with fury if she were a human. She looked like she wanted to wring out my neck. "Fine!" she hissed. "If you go to Forks… we're done."
Shock, was to be expected, so was hurt. But surprisingly hurt wasn't what I felt. I felt… relief? "So be it then," I said coldly. "Goodbye Alice. I'll see you when I return."
Even though I wasn't hurt, I felt her pain as soon as I said the words. I was too proud of myself to even calm her down. "Fine," she whispered brokenly before walking out of the room.
I felt guilty afterwards, for hurting her so badly, but it didn't matter now. I was off to Forks. I needed to fix all this whether the family liked it or not.
A/N: Okay maybe that was kind of bad, but I promise it gets better! I need at least 7 reviews to continue so I hope you guys liked it! I love you!
Thanks for Reading!