Dante's Inferno
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Elliot Pole

By general consent, "My Immortal," a hHarry Potter story, is the worst fanfic ever.

Here are some quotes:

"Everybody's in love with me! Why did Satan make me so beautiful?"

"I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT," Hagirid said shirlly, "BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!"

"Well, anyway, I put on some black eyeshadow, black eyeliner, and some black lipstick and white foundation. Then I went. Den I gasped......................Snake and Loopin were in the middle of the hall, doin it, and Dobby was watching!"

I was thinking, what if someone did this type of fanfic, for the Bible?

2/2/2009 #1
Thoughtless7

I still laugh that there really is a Bible section here. 8DDD *has always meant to look for Bible fanfics, but frequently forgot*

2/2/2009 #2
otherrealmwriter

I still laugh that there really is a Bible section here. 8DDD *has always meant to look for Bible fanfics, but frequently forgot*

I mostly read the poetry there.

2/2/2009 #3
Phantom Thief Zel

Well I dunno... My Immortal is a trollfic, so it's horrendously awful on purpose. :/

But it still is pretty ghastly to read.

2/2/2009 #4
otherrealmwriter

There is a series of vids on Youtube that reads it: http://www.youtube.com/group/badfic

2/2/2009 #5
REVOLuTiontte En Casca

"My Immortal" is integral FFN history, from where I'm seeing it - The most epic form of trolling yet to be contested on the site. It's gained historical value amongst teh internetz members, but more or less is merely one of those little things that you pride yourself on knowing about. ;)

2/3/2009 #6
Artemis Mitera

LOL! Right? I think I heard that it was finally deleted, I'm not sure. That reading of the story made me LOL so hard when I first read it. Sheesh, it was Epic Fail.

2/3/2009 #7
Elliot Pole

It's been self-publsihed:

http://www.lulu.com/content/4297526

2/3/2009 #8
kerushii-sushi

Worst fic I ever read was "A Ruse of Hatred" by Milana-Despana.

I think she removed it, but it was bad. Gave me nightmares for a week.

2/4/2009 #9
otherrealmwriter

I read some pretty bad Jonas Brothers fanfics. O_o

2/5/2009 #10
Her Sweetness

Oh, oh! I found some amazingly badfic. So, I don't usually read Land Before Time fics (you know, about those cartoon dinosaur kids?) and I wasn't even aware they had a filter for that here, but one day I came across this fic called Land Before Time: Littlefoot x Cera and it's like... porn. It's so horrible, it's all dinosaur sex/rape and the dialogue is as if she theasaurus'd every word. Seriously. You guys should go check it out, it'll make you cry with laughter. Or just cry.

3/16/2009 #11
Phantom Thief Zel

... Well, there goes my childhood.

;_;

In all seriousness, though, I read one chapter and almost fell out of my chair laughing. It's quite possibly the worst thing I have ever forced myself to read. Quite a worthy candidate for the title, I'd say.

3/16/2009 . Edited 3/16/2009 #12
Her Sweetness

Lol! Yeah, man, and every chapter is like that. They even try out new positions.

3/17/2009 #13
Artemis Mitera
Oh my god. Its worse than furry pr0n, I swear. I skimmed through the first chapter, and I'm disgusted. I saw the reviews, they were like good job, its not too graphic, or whatever. *shudders*
3/17/2009 #14
8I

Anyone heard of 'An Elf's Love'? Pretty much, you look up Mary Sue in the dictionary and there's picture of Rosa Monroe. She's actually a LOT better than she used to be... The author's re-written the fic SO MANY times that her character couldn't help but improve, but she's still a Mary Sue. Her story was called 'Middleearth's last hope' for a while, and now it's just called 'Last Hope'. Anyway... An Elf's Love was probably way up there in bad stories.

3/17/2009 #15
Demoness Drakon

Holy shit, it actually got good reviews? I'm in shock.

Ok, I read that story; and even I could write a better sex scene then that, and I can barely stomach reading my friends' pornfics. The writing is worse then anything I've ever written in my life; even the ones I wrote in kindergarden.

I actually read about 14 chapters of the story. It was so crappy, I think my IQ dropped several points.

6/1/2009 #16
Elliot Pole

I wonder...anyone who has read this, does Tara Gilespie talk about Pornkeys instead of Portkeys? That seems like something she would've done.

6/2/2009 #17
Ghost in Front of Me

I don't remember her saying anything about Pornkeys, but there were some other hilarious spelling mistakes that just made my stomach church.

7/25/2009 #18
sally's sister

I think this one counts: Crimson blood

I was shocked in silence for a full minute. Now that proves it.

Then I checked out his profile and... ARE. YOU. FREAKING. KIDDING. ME.

No. Just no. My precious brain! *whimper*

7/25/2009 #19
Ghost in Front of Me

^ Pure. Utter. Shame.

What I've always wondered though, is.....do people actually enjoy writing like crap?

7/25/2009 #20
sally's sister

The trolls, yes. But he doesn't seem to be a troll, which is even worse.

Gah, I was actually too shocked to laugh.

7/25/2009 #21
Ghost in Front of Me

He seems like a sad, pitiful boy...

I couldn't laugh. I was too horrified.

7/25/2009 #22
obi-glasses

I PM'd him, telling him he was a shameful excuse for a writer (amongst other things). Now to settle in and wait for a response. *grin* I can't wait to see if he'll burst a vein at my remarks. Glorious, glorious rage. Delicious like chocolate.

*ahem* Excuse that, I haven't had my fill of hurt/comfort so I've had to resort to other means of satasfaction.

7/25/2009 #23
Ghost in Front of Me

Oh the envy! Do you mind me asking you to post the message? (or send it in a pm) I would love to read it!

7/25/2009 #24
Undeniable Mystique
Oh my goodness 0.o there are no words to describe that fanfic
10/2/2009 #25
To-Remember-Me-By

Wow...that fic redefines what it means to be a moron. That author needs some serious lessons in how to use basic english properly.

10/4/2009 #26
The Love Bug

I think the profile is worse than the story *shudders*

Both require bargain-buy amounts of brain bleach. (I remember when I was first traumatised into drinking cleaning fluid...:)

10/5/2009 #27
The Love Bug

Maybe they don't realise they're terrible?

That's the case with some of the nastynastynasty Naruto fanfiction I've read. The authors genuinely believe they can write-and that grammar is for sissies.

Or normal spelling, for that matter. Hell, even paragraphing is too comformist for these people nowadays.

*_*

10/5/2009 #28
Sarge Ray

I saw that last fic and that is bad, even on oneshot standards.

My BROTHER is the same age as that author and he can write FAR better than him. Why? Because he's smart enough to take writing tips and grammar lessons. Heck, he's even talked sense into people TWICE his age on this site.

10/25/2009 #29
To-Remember-Me-By

Ah, trolls. They're so much fun.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4613764/1/Dagon_ball_Z_new_Z

Here's a really bad fic I came across a while back, and have just came across again while - fic-hunting. Read at your own peril.

10/25/2009 . Edited 10/25/2009 #30
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