Team Dragon Star
The most kick-ass group of writers the world has ever seen! Team Dragon Star is a collaborative community of writers that work together to bring you the very best stories that we can. Everyone and anyone is welcome to apply at the 'Marshalling Zone' but for those who would just like to chat, feel free to visit almost any of the other topics.
New Follow Forum Follow Topic
Page 1 2 Next »
DevilsDoCry

In co-ordination with this idea of Raz's, ive made up a planning section where we can work out character quirks and personalities.

7/29/2011 . Edited by Kakarot Son, 7/15/2012 #1
gue22

Hi fello TDS'asses

In light of our recent discussion on 'planning out our collab fic more' I'm proposing an approach we could use to do just that.

8/20/2011 . Edited 9/14/2011 #2
serena'darien1613

I like it!!!!! Since I don't know much about DBZ, I can't help that much, but I can give details, if you want them. I really think this is a good idea. I bet it gets real far. ^^

8/20/2011 #3
gue22

Um but Serena, this is not an idea for a story, it's an idea for a format or a template that tds can use for it's mutichaptered fics

I wanted to present the format with actual content so it's clear, but the main thing is the format of the thing

what are your thoughts on that?

8/20/2011 #4
serena'darien1613

Ohhh. -_- I feel stupid now. Whats a format/template? ^^"

8/20/2011 #5
gue22

like a plan, or layout to pre-arrange how the story is going to flow in each chapter, before actually writing the chapter, something like that

8/20/2011 #6
serena'darien1613

OOOOHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! O.K. I get it now!!!!! heh heh thanks Gue. ^^"

8/20/2011 #7
gue22

no prob serena :-)

8/20/2011 #8
Dr. Blue22

Serena, I made the same mistake :D

8/20/2011 #9
serena'darien1613

Yay!! I'm not alone!! Ahem I mean Yeah It's confusing, right? heh heh ^^"

8/20/2011 #10
Dr. Blue22

We get so caught up in how amazing Gue is that we skipped reading the instructions, common high school mistake xD

8/20/2011 #11
Zi-Dawg

Now this is something I can stand by. A Clear template about what has to happen in each chapter...you see, this is how you properly collaborate. Thank You Gue for bringing something like this up and showing how it could be used.

8/20/2011 #12
DevilsDoCry

Well it is one of many useful ways to format it, if you have your own style go with that, but this is a brilliant go to if you are ever having a hard time, nice one Gue

8/21/2011 #13
gue22

proposed outline for:

Tortured Soul

Chap 2

Gohan arrives, anticipating his superior strength Videl shoots first, clean shot to the head

Gohan is shocked and outraged by the attempt on his life, he roughs her up a bit and warns her off, giving her a second chance

Videl realises that DB is just about indestructable, goes back to the drawing board to come up with a new plan

Gohan carries on with DB missions, he also finds that he can't stop thinking about a certain asassin

She starts survailance on yamcha, watching from afar, listening in on his conversations, till she uncovers the true identity of DB

Chap 3

Videl sets up survailance in the two Son residences (Gohan's and Chichi's) she sees and hears mind-boggling truths. so she knows he's some kinda half-breed alien

Comfortable that she knows her facts, she establishes his routine. she picks a time when they'll be away to sneak into his house and unleash the virus (a small space, maybe his closet or his en-suite, or pantry)

gohan inhales the virus unknowingly, but also realises from the minute he gets home that the scent of a certain assasin is lingering in his house

The effects of the virus are immidiate and severe, maybe a normal person would be dead in say an hour?

He calls Bulma just as he collapses (thankfully his genes are a bit stronger and tougher so he survives longer and they are able to cure him) he barely survives

obviously, he's pissed

Chap 4

Videl gets grief at work for still not having completed her mission

The governments behind the manufacturing plants are revealed, and so is their plan to overthrow the world leader and start a world war

Gohan recovers, sets out to find her, he knows her ki and scent, it's not that difficult

He kidnapps her, he wants answers

Chap 5

Videl is held captive, but no matter what they threaten, she never talks

Vegeta votes they kill her or use torture, but Gohan can't do it, he's too soft, and he's too secretly infatuated with evrything about her

Bulma solves their problem with a truth serum?

Videl talks, but never remembers

Chap 6

It becomes Gohan's obsession, learning everything he can aboout Videl Satan, crime-fighter, and satan city heroine, and how she 'died' in a horrific fire trying to save lives.

He tries to reconcile agent Del Tan to that girl, and realizes that neither Videl, nor Del are all that different to DB

Chap 7

Gohan confronts Videl about her secrets, and tells her that he believes she's a good person, so he reveals DB's exploits and why

Videl is appauled that she was sent out to terminate a target that had never taken a life, or conspiring to take life, as was agency protocol

She calls a truce and regrets her attempts on his life

She leaves a message for her boss, telling him she knows he's 'dirty' and that he should watch his back, cause she's gonna clean him out

Chap 8

Del Tan, the she-man, aka the Jawbreaker is now wanted by her agency

Moves into Gohan's house where no one will find her, she knows she's a target and would hate to kill whichever agent they sent after her, so lays low in the serenity + tranquility of Mt Paouzu while, working together with Gohan to find out why her agency is being 'dirty'

Videl notices her attraction to DB (obviously) who wouldn't, lol

Chap 9

Fluff with the Sons

Goten trains Videl, while Gohan has to work

They finally uncover the plot to overthrow the world leader and start a war

They plan to approach him wiht the info, but Videl knows he probably wont listen to them, there is only one person he'll listen to : Her father

Chap 10

Father + daughter reunite (emotional stuff, bla bla bla)

Full flashback of fire, how Videl got injured and how she came to the decision to be announced as dead

Hercule nearly has a heartache when he realizes that Videl's 'friend' is THE D-B

...

err...I have zero ideas left right now, someone put me out of my misery and pick it up from here

Gue

8/21/2011 . Edited 9/14/2011 #14
Kakarot Son

Great job with taking the initiative on this one Gue, this is great. We should do this for each story, so let us start with The Missing Prince and Tortured Soul, recapping on the past chapters.

Missing: Chapter 1.

Focus:Gohan's position as the prince, and Chichi moving into the palace. As well as Chichi's pregnancy, with Goten. Towards the end of it, leaving the life he knew behind to live a solitary one.

I just realised that I hadn't posted this, I'd left it open in a tab.

I'll add Missing Chapter 2, soon enough.

8/21/2011 #15
Kakarot Son

Brilliant Gue! I guess I don't have to outline anything on Tortured Soul after all.

I'll go with Chapter 2 for Missing now.

Focus: Gohan's thoughts and the basic aftermath of his departure.

It begins with Gohan, taking on a first person point of view. Slowly talking about how he'd gone missing and explains that he's gone from the world. It then begins with the introduction of Erasa, and ends with Gohan meeting Videl.

Zi would be able to provide a much better summary on that, for sure.

___

Chapter 3:

Focus: Meeting Videl and Sharpener, his life and thoughts over the passed few years and ends with the beginning of a bank scene. The intro to Saiyaman/Gold fighter.

Gohan introduces himself under the name Gohan Moon. Right after he clashes with Videl. It explains that Chichi could not be brought back by the Dragonballs, 'for reasons not understandable by mere mortals.'

It then talks about Videl's relationship with her teachers, and how Gohan feels alienated in highschool.

Next it's suddenly lunch and he ascends to Super Saiyan, wanting to get away from it all. He also recaps how he managed hide his power-level for so long from the Z-fighters.

It then starts on Videl landing, to take care of a bank robbery, as Gohan trails her (still in Super Saiyan) and whispers Videl.

Proposed Chapter 4:

Focus: Gohan taking down the baddies with Videl, returning to school for a while (learning that he burned his shirt in the transformation, so has to choose some different attire somehow), and then returning to his 'base.' (In the prior chapter it explained how he had formerly set up a computer which would seek out his Ki signature and use it, he then converted it to his bracelet, but the computer's still much more stable.

Videl turns around, to see no-one there. Little does she know Gohan's on the ceiling. She then proceeds to attack the bank robbers, until she's caught in a lock. Gohan then enters the scene and saves Videl from the robbers only to realise she didn't need saving. As she had taken out the one which caught her in a lock. The last robber launches an RPG at them, which Gohan stops with his bare hand. He flies of just as Videl's about to question him.

He returns to school, forced to wear a spare shirt he had in his back pack, which he really hoped he didn't end up wearing. (Perhaps it can be Goku's gi top, and he didn't want to get it dirty, or it was the only other top he currently had so he was forced to wear it resentfully. It depends whether or not Gue wants Gohan to hate Goku.) It can be wrapped up with Erasa requesting he go shopping with them, only to get blown off by Gohan.

He could then return to his base, and create the outfit for the super-hero (Gold Fighter, or Saiyaman. I personally vote Saiyaman.), while turning his bracelet into a watch. So it wouldn't look as suspicious. He then integrates the costume into the watch, effectively combining his normal watch with a Ki suppression device. It could end with him pondering on life in general, and why he was the one to live on. And also what he had been doing to survive for the passed couple of years (food, liquid etc.).

___

For the next chapter, I hope to have someone writing about how he found his base. I wouldn't mind doing that myself.

8/21/2011 #16
Dr. Blue22

Seems like you could separate Chapter four into 2 separate chapters. It's kinda long compared to whats happening in the other 3. But i like it.

8/21/2011 #17
Kakarot Son

I suppose, it's up to Gue. If she wants I'll be more than willing to write some of it. Hell I'm going to end up taking way to many projects than I can handle if I keep saying that.

8/22/2011 #18
Razamataz22

I have donated Tranquil Violence to TDS and the first four chapters will remain the same, I will post them at regular intervals. When I have done my part, I will place a detailed analysis of how I envisioned it to go for the next writer to follow up

Also at the moment Devil and I are discussing where we are going to take Heroes in a way that we can allow other characters to flow into the story without disturbing our storyline until such a time as other people join in. I will state this though, I'm going to create another piece of this forum where everybody's OC can be viewed as to not take up unnecessary room. On the forum will also be the journey so far, much like a journal so we can keep track of where everybody is and ensure that we're keeping on track without backpeddling.

8/22/2011 #19
Razamataz22

Alright for those who want a hand in writing Tranquil Violence, here's how the story was planned to play out.

Chapter 4.5 (optional): Who enjoys writing really one sided fight scenes between the teachers and the students. Not the sort of fight scenes where Krillen punches a hole through one of the people who had just started but rather fights where Gohan and co. simply dodge and block all of the incoming attacks while constantly telling them what they need to improve on, provoking them somewhat. Like I said this chapter is optional, it would be more of an action filler then anything.

Chapter 5: Videl makes her way home, her frustration boiling over the fact she was unable to land a single blow on Gohan despite the fact that he didn't release his killing intent. Only one person had been able to land a strike the entire time and that had been the other girl who had been paired up with Yamcha and used her sex appeal to make him drop his guard before punching him in the chest. Despite that, the ex baseball player hadn't shown any pain whatsoever.

Upon making it home, she is goaded by her brother in a comical matter. With her frustrations at breaking point she nearly verbally snaps before regaining control of her emotions. She opts to storm off, going to bed rather then having dinner with her family where she knows she would be interrogated by her father about clues about the new dojo training patterns.

The next morning she meets up with Erasa who is on her way to work. Videl tags along in that she wants to find out when specific training times are. When they rock up they find Tien in a one fingered handstand balancing perfectly. Videl asks when training is and Tien explains that it is whenever a member of staff is available which he explains in everyday when the sun is up until late at night. Videl requests for training and Tien leads her into the zen garden in the opening romm where he guides her through a meditation faze, explaining how a match is sometimes won by the person who is able to keep their emotions in check and Videl realises how she had lost her cool in her fight against Gohan. Taking her position, Tien and Videl start to meditate before Erasa comes t join them, treading lightly on the pebbles. End Chapter.

Chapter 6: A week on from the opening day and Videl is going out training again. AS she leaves Hercule notices the borad smile on her face and how she's been looking forward to going to training ever since going to this new dojo. Mark thinks it's alright and doesn't see the need to worry. Hercule however tells Mark to tail her and find out what they're doing. Mark believes this to be underhanded but has little say in the matter. He arrives at the dojo to find Freed fighting off against Sharpner with an iron ball strapped to each foot, much like a prison gang. He continues watching in disbelief as they try to attack one another but are unable to get close enough to do anything while the rest of the students cheer on, making a sport out of it. He is tapped on the shoulder by Gohan who is standing beside him shocking him slightly. He braces himself for anything but Gohan waves his hand nonchalantly. He asks what Mark is doing, who quickly lies in an attempt to save his own skin. Gohan however calls him on the bluff and Mark ends up confessing that his father had sent him to inspect what it was like. Gohan says that he doesn't care about what Hercule finds out, saying that they have no secrets to hide. Mark asks him about what Freed and Sharpner are doing and Gohan explains that it is a training exercise in where the competitiors must learn to think outside the box. As he is speaking, grabs the iron chains in his hands and lifts up the steel ball with great difficulty. With his feet now able to move effectively, Sharpner charge forward in an attempt to simply ram his shoulder into Freed since said man cannot move out of the way. This fails however as the chain slips from his left hand and the iron ball hits the ground causing his foot to be yanked backwards and he sequentially falls face first into the dirt.

Mark can't help but chuckle lightly and Gohan explains that he was going to be taking the guys on a training camp over the coming weekend and that if Mark wanted to come he was more than welcome to. Mark says he'll think about it and leaves as Gohan steps inside. He later meets up with his father who asks him about what he had discovered and Mark simply states that he hadn't found anything of value.

That's all I got for the moment but it should work out well...I hope

9/1/2011 . Edited 9/1/2011 #20
DevilsDoCry

Thank you very much Raz, i may have to take another approach with HOL before i lose whats left of my mind, how about a Vegeta chapter we havent focused on him at all.

9/1/2011 #21
Razamataz22

There's only so much you can do with a man in a space pod.

9/1/2011 #22
DevilsDoCry

Exactly what i was thinking, but starting off with Videl and Gohan doesnt feel right, might try switching between the three of them

9/1/2011 #23
Razamataz22

Yea, somehow I don't think Vegeta's going to be happy doing things like playing Chess on the ship's computer to occupy his time when he's planning out a war.

9/1/2011 #24
gue22

Is he not asleep in the pod?

9/1/2011 #25
DevilsDoCry

Vegeta is a tactical genius, he knows that it takes more than 1 saiyan to turn the tide, he will be searching for fighters on planets on the way to earth. Well thats how its going in my head, you could have had something completely different RAZ.

9/1/2011 #26
Razamataz22

He knows that Frieza controls half the universe in a freaking monoploy, finding warriors to stand up against him would be nearly impossible. My thoughts would be that he'd head straight back to Earth, knowing that Gohan scared Frieza when the tyrant first saw the level at which Gohan was training. At the moment Vegeta would be confident enough to take on somebody like Dodoria or even Zarbon. Vegeta's pride would prevent him from allowing anybody but a Saiyan to tackle Frieza head on.

9/1/2011 #27
DevilsDoCry

Which brings up yet another problem, if Goku is strong enough to wreck the androids, Frieza will be a cake walk

9/1/2011 #28
Kakarot Son

I have almost no reason to interject here as I've not been keeping track, quite honestly, of HOL. I intend to catch up soon. But that sounds like the Earth-Namek Vegeta, I'll support Raz on this one. Besides bringing in a bunch of OC's usually ruins a good story (unless it's something like heroes). If you need a reason, say it's because the Saiyan race needed to get their revenge.

9/1/2011 #29
DevilsDoCry

Ok i get it bad idea.

9/1/2011 #30
Page 1 2 Next »
Forum Moderators: Kakarot Son DarkVoid116, boboleta, ShadowMajin, Ri696q, gue22, Team Dragon Star, Gohan-to-the-max
Rules:
  • Forums are not to be used to post stories.
  • All forum posts must be suitable for teens.
  • The owner and moderators of this forum are solely responsible for the content posted within this area.
  • All forum abuse must be reported to the moderators.
Membership Length: 2+ years 1 year 6+ months 1 month 2+ weeks new member