Author has written 2 stories for Yu-Gi-Oh GX, and Yu-Gi-Oh.
Hey, Queen of Britannia here. I hail from Canada land of many wonders one including monopoly coloured money. I just love that. Even though my pename suggests it I am not, in fact, from Britain nor do I rule it. (though I wish I did) I do, however, love British boys and their sexy accents.
Most of the time I only send messages to tell people I like their story and they should update it soon (as in asap). I have, however, actually posted a story and I'm excited. That's just a bit about my life on ff.net, let's get on to the life I'm supposed to have for real...and don't.
Avatar: Athena, Aurelia's other duel spirit and friend of Ruin, Queen of Oblivion.
Okay, I'm back to working on HETL but it's slow going as classes have started up again. The first chapters of Season 3 are up.
New quote: Mutations: Spicing up your sex life since Mendel's peas.
Anywho, Name: Laura
Fav. things to do: read, belly dance, horseback ride and watch my fav. movies.
Fav. books: Chronicles of Narnia, the Firebrand, Avalon series (by Marion Zimmer Bradley), Phantom Stallion series, Black Stallion, The Luxe series, Nefertiti, The Heretic Queen, Lords of the Underworld series, School for Heiresses series...the list goes on forever.
Fav. Movies: Chronicles of Narnia, Star Wars, Chronicles of Riddick, Underworld Evolution, Scorpion King, Harry Potter and all the Disney classics.
Fav. Shows: Stargate SG-1!! Heartland, Legend of the Seeker, NCIS, NCIS: Los Angelos, Criminal Minds, Vampire Diaries, Supernatural, Yu-Gi-Oh (all of them), Pokemon (yeah), Star Trek (all of them),...again the list goes on.
Narnia- Peter/OC, Edmund/OC, Peter/Susan, Edmund/Lucy (I know, incest, but I pretend they aren't siblings)
Harry Potter- Draco/Hermione, Harry/Ginny
Star Wars- Anakin/Padme, Luke/Mara Jade
Yu-Gi-Oh- Seto/Kisara, Seto/OC, Atem/OC, Seto/Joey, Bakura/Ryou, Marik/Malik, occasionally Atem/Yugi (Because Atem is his name people NOT Yami)
Yu-Gi-Oh GX- Love: Chazz/OC, Jesse/Jaden, Zane/Aster (there aren't enough fics about them) Like: Chazz/Jaden, Jaden/Alexis
Pokemon - Gary/OC, Drew/May, Paul/Dawn, Ash/Misty, occasionally Gary/Ash (in that order)
Stargate SG-1 - Jack/Sam, Daniel/Vala, Cam/OC
W.I.T.C.H.: Matt/Will, Caleb/Cornelia, Hay-Lin/Eric, Taranee/Nigel
Couples I Hate:
Narnia: Not a fan of any slash in Narnia, Tumnus/Lucy (ick)
Harry Potter: Ron/Hermione (boring), Harry/Pansy, Snape/Hermione, Harry/Draco
Star Wars: Obi-Wan/Padme (she belongs with Anakin)
Yu-Gi-Oh: Seto/Serenity, Joey/Mai (don't really hate just not a huge fan)
Yu-Gi-Oh GX: Chazz/Syrus, Zane/Atticus, Jesse/Jim, Chazz/Blair, Zane/Syrus, Haou/Jaden, Jaden/Yubel
Pokemon: Gary/Misty, Ash/May, Ash/Dawn
Stargate SG-1: Pete/Sam, Cam/Sam, Cam/Vala, Jack/Daniel
W.I.T.C.H.: Caleb/Will (Her and Matt are so made for each other), Irma/Martin (he's better as just a friend/stalker), Matt/Cornelia (see Caleb/Will for reason), Phobos/Will
That is about all I read on Fanfiction.net. if I start something else I'll put it on here.
Fav. Singers- Avril Lavigne, Aly and AJ, Aerosmith, Carrie Underwood, Cinema Bizarre (they're just on Hiatus! They can't break up!), Disney songs (gotta love em), Evanescence, Hayley Westenra, Martina McBride, Rascal Flatts, SheDaisy, Goo Goo Dolls, Sugarland, Kate Voegele, Keith Urban, Kelly Clarkson, Lady Antebellum, Lady Gaga, Faith Hill, Nickelback, Orianthi, Pussycat Dolls, Rhianna, Taylor Swift (LOVE HER!!), Within Temptation...That's only a few.
Things (and People) I dislike - carrots, bubblegum, math, sluts, chat room talk like how r u? and c u l8ter. stories should be written with proper grammer and complete words. Homophobes, people thinking they are better than anyone else, horror movies, pop (as in soda for all you Americans), Brittney Spears, Paris Hilton, braces (I hated wearing them), glasses (I hate wearing them now), and people who think pot is cool. seriously, will these people never learn?
things (and People) I like- chocolate, cookies, cake (can you tell I'm into junk food?), romance (but none of that really sappy stuff and the horrible nicknames like 'Snookums' and 'honeybunch'), vampires, history (preferably English, Greek or Egyptian), music, Disney movies (only the classics), William Moseley, Hayden Christensen, Natalie Portman, Tom Felton, animals, reading (mostly on ff.net), and World of Warcraft.
Here's a memo for everyone who gets stressed a lot and hate it. Write stressed on a card and hold it up to a mirror. Eat what it says. Just try it. I got this idea from Reizbar-Ookami in her story Thanks for the Memo. For those who don't like Yaoi or puppyshipping, don't read it. Reizbar don't leave us!
Just to let you know:
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things.
So anyway that's all about me besides my complete randomness and the fact that I carry on and on. but you probably already knew that...you being so clever and all. (lol Lion King!)
BTW: Bakura = sexy. Copy and paste if you follow this logic.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this in to your profile
If you love the rain copy this in to your profile
If you think Writer's block sucks copy this in to your profile.
If you like chocolate as much as I do copy this in your profile. YUM!
If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile.
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. TOTALLY!
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929,SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin,The Komodo Dragon Phoenix,Bust_A_Groover, Tecna, Novemberscorpion110388, WriterGirl3000, tietum, EAPshadows, Rairox64, rAiKiMlOver455673, RaixKim4eva, 000kayko000, Queen of Britannia
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Too many kids and teenagers have smoked or tried marijuana. If you haven't, copy and paste this onto your profile.
98 of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels.
If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.
92 percent of American teens would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.
If you listen to music too much copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
if you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your profile
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile
I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile
If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.
If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.
Bakura = sexy. Copy and paste if you follow this logic.
The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.
If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Edward's One True Love, oceaneyes85253, TheEmoSideOfMe, EdwardlovesChristyalways, Queen of Britannia
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile
If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your pro!
If your skin is almost always cold...copy and paste this onto your profile
If you'vebeen on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica(real name)(i always change my penname)(tehehehe) I'veComeToTakeYourCheese, Vampire Scooby, Edward's One True Love, oceaneyes85253, TheEmoSideOfMe, EdwardlovesChristyalways, Hamie120, Queen of Britannia
If you think the semi-colon is completely useless, stupid, annoying and plotting to destroy the English language as we know it, put this in your pro!
If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you can imagine yourself in a video game/ manga/ or anime, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever had this annoying kid in your class at school talking so loud you can hear them across the room when everyone else is talking, and you just want to strangle them but you resist the urge and then you look down to realize you messed up your work because you were concentrating so hard on non-homicidal thoughts, copy this into your profile.
If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
98 percent of the internet has a MySpace. If you're part of the two percent that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.
If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over air, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you agree, that purple bunnies WILL rule the world, copy and paste this into your profile
My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have and insane friend copy this into your profile
For me crazy is a loose term. Crazy is where you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what's so interesting about the eraser.Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you say or do things that are completely random, like, "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumb war with yourself (I find that I'm a very tough opponent.). So if you are crazy copy this onto your profile.
I agree when people say girls rule now and 4ever. Copy & paste this in your profile if you agree
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.(Every Disney and Star Wars movie)
If you have way too many of these things, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you listen closely to song lyrics and relate them to your fics copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever gone to sleep one way and woken up the opposite way Copy & Paste this into your profile
I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random (Or can be at times) and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingys, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Just because we eat animals for food, doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, ECT, copy this onto your profile.
If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile!
If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever wished you were Hermione Granger, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself, copy this into your profile.
I'm a klutz. I mean, a MAJOR klutz. As in, I trip over things that aren't there and I accidentally drop quite a few things. If you're a klutz too, then copy and paste this onto your profile (but don't trip!) to fill the world with us unbalanced people!
Many writers don't know the difference between 'your' and 'you're.' If you happen to understand this mundanely ridiculous fact, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a tendency to talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away then remembered, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever tried to lick your elbow and knew that it was physically impossible, copy this to your profile.
If you talk so fast no one can understand you unless they try really hard and even then it's a struggle, copy this into your profile.
If you ever got hit in the face with a soccer ball, football, etc., copy and paste this onto your profile
You don't have to be a twig to be beautiful. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you get too excited for books, movies, etc. to come out copy and paste this in your profile.
If you are Harry Potter obsessed, copy this into you profile and add your name: Ga Nat Nat, Evil Older Sister, Frozenfan, The Choco-Holic, Jade Snape-Holloway, psychotic me, LLAMAS WILL RULE THE WORLD, PrettyFanGirl, Cannotstopwriting,jasmineflower27, dork-with-glasses, Rhiannon da crazygirl. Fred-Weasley-Isn't-dead, Queen of Britannia
If you spend a lot of time wishing Hogwarts existed, copy and paste this into your account
You know your addiction to Harry Potter is getting dangerous when you've added words like "Voldemort", "Hogwarts", and "Marauders" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done that, copy this into your profile.
If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are anti-social sometimes, copy and paste this into your profile.
If 99.9% of the time, you have no clue what‘s going on, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a long list of fictional book/ movie characters that you are in love with copy and paste this into your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
If you are so cool that you actually read through all of these copy this into your profile!
If you are guilty of doing a British, Irish, Australian, Southern accent or Elvis impression, copy this in your profile.
If you hear voices of the characters in your head, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you wish you went to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, then copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list with your house of choice: FiyeroTiggular93 - Slytherin, Weirder Than You - Ravenclaw, Aangsfan - We'll never tell. You'll never know, GigoLove07- Ravenclaw. Queen of Britannia - Slytherin.
If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!
If you and your friend break out into song in a public area, put this into your profile.
If you DON'T check under the bed for monsters, but you DO check behind the shower curtain for monsters/murderers, copy this into your profile. I do.
If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile.
My life has been beyond boring. Nothing of great importance, good or bad, has happened to me. Copy this into your profile if your life is boring.
I enjoy smashing the fourth wall on a regular basis. Such as when I hug my favorite anime characters when they're being kawaii and/or beat the hell out of/scream at them when they do something stupid. If you enjoy smashing the fourth wall, copy this, paste it into your profile, and add your name. AlukaKaiserin (i yelled at Zane for TWO HOURS when i watched episode 163, and i just HAD to hug him when i saw him when he was nine. Squee time!), Chaotic Blades (I'll help you through Dark World, don't worry Jaden!) Chiyoko-chan ( I yelled and threw pillows at Chazz's brothers, Slade and Jagger while i was watching episode 25-26. CHAZZ IT UP!),Fanning A Revengefull Flame (i cheered ad hugged my imaginary jaden plushie when he hugged chazz in one of the episodes of gx) Queen of Britannia (i got so angry at Chazz's brothers when they were threatening him i wanted to scream. i think i did.)
Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it!
If it totally pisses you off when people say being gay is gross than copy and paste this into your profile
If you don't have a problem with Homosexuality copy this into your profile
WHETHER IT BE BETWEEN TWO MALES, TWO FEMALES OR A MALE AND A FEMALE, LOVE IS LOVE AND NOTHING LESS THAN JUST THAT!..copy and paste this into your profile if you agree.
If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you don't use myspace and are proud of it, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you hate child abuse and want it to STOP, copy and past this on your profile.
If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.
Words of Advice
1. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
2. If life gives you lemons, make grape juice! Then sit back sipping it while watching people try to figure out how the hell you pulled that one off!
3. Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
4. Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
5. Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.
6. Behind every bitch there's a guy that made her that way.
7. Dance like no one's watching. Sing like no one's listening.
8. An apple a Day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
9. Sometimes you've got to smile and walk away... Hold your tears in and pretend like you're okay. But you can't always do that. Cause someday, it will all come out anyway.
10. Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often.
11. Smile... It makes people wonder what you're up to
12. If all else fails, try reading the instructions.
13. If you can't convince them, confuse them.
14. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
15. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself...and spiders
16. If two wrongs don't make a right, try three
17. 1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you.
18. When a boy sweeps you off your feet, he's in the perfect position to drop you on your ass
Dear Math, I'm not a therapist, solve your own problems.
Dear Algebra, Stop asking me to find your X, she's not coming back.
Being weird is like being normal, only better.
Boys are like trees - they take 50 years to grow up.
Idaho, no Udaho
I Live in my own little world. but it's okay...they know me here.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought
Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!
Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, screw the fruit!
When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back
Oops! I appear to have fallen on your lips!
Guys should be like lattes: rich, strong, and hot!
He who laughs last didn't get it.
Remember there's a light at the end of every tunnel, just make sure its not a train.
Love? I'd rather fall in chocolate
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
You learn at least one new thing every day, though the vast majority of those things usually aren't learned in school.
I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS!
I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.
I’m so clever that sometimes, I don’t even know what I’m saying.
Guns don’t kill people. Bullets kill people.
Isn’t it funny how the word politics is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many in Latin, and tics meaning 'bloodsucking creatures?'
Let's flip a coin-heads we'll be together, tails we flip again.
Huh, it figures. All the good guys are taken, vampires, or both.
I agree with the dictionary. gals before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.
I don't obsess! I think intensely.
All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.
There are three kinds of people in the world; ones that can count and ones that can't count.
There are two ways to argue with women, neither one works.
If it weren't for the gutter my mind would be homeless.
If it weren't for physics and law enforcement, I'd be unstoppable.
I wouldn't say you're stupid, you are, but I wouldn't say it.
Hello, I see the assassins have failed.
Even if the voices aren't real they have some good ideas.
I'm not crazy, your just more sane then I am.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, and Germany doesn't want to go to war.
If vodka was water, and I was a duck, I'd swim to the bottom and never come up. But vodka's not water, and I'm not a duck. So slide me a bottle and shut the fuck up.
I once gave up anime. It was the most terrifying weekend of my life!
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.
I'm not always a dork. Sometimes I'm asleep.
You are stupid and therefore wrong.
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
I'm not clumsy... The floor just hates me.
Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.
I'm not a complete idiot --Some parts are missing.
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
God must love stupid people; He made so many.
Smart is sexy.
2 out of 3 people understand fractions.
You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge, I get a paddle boat and save your stupid...
When it rains on my parade, I bust out the slip n' slide.
A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work.
Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door...
Someday we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
Fuck being a princess! I wanna be a vampire! (This is definitely my friend Kay)
Harry Potter Fanfiction keeps me sane.
Twilight is a fling while Harry Potter is my one true love.
Emmett's the strongest.
But only Jasper can sit in a corner and STILL make everyone feel jealous. (I'm a sucker for Jasper ;)
Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who the Hell is drinking my water!
A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. But a best friend will go up to him and say "It's because you're gay isn't it?"
A friend helps you up when you fall a best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"
A friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, THAT WAS AWESOME , LET'S DO IT AGAIN!!
Friends will ask you why you are crying but best friends already have a shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry.
I used to be normal, until I met those losers I now call my best friends!
Friends hug you good-bye. Best friends rape you in the hallway.
A best friend is the one who can look at you with the biggest smile on your face and still knows something's wrong.
A friend is someone who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
Friends will always be like "Well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "You will die in seven days."
Inside jokes midnight calls crazy nights = Best friends
A best friend is a girl you can call in the middle of the night and say you killed someone and she would say "Where should we hide the body."
A friend will laugh at you when you play the air guitar a best friend will be standing there next to you doing the drum beat on your head
My friends are people who would spend hours trying to drown a fish but I lovethem to death!
You know you've got the greatest friends when the only time they make you cry is when you're laughing too hard.
Flip flops and belly tops, lemonade in da shade, blue skies, hot guys, late nights and water fights, ice cream, sweet dreams, party time, lookin' fine, sleeping in and sneaking out, that's what girls are all about
Horrible Pick-up lines and what to Reply
Guy: Where have you been all my life?
Guy: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Guy: Is this seat empty?
Guy: Your place or mine?
Guy: So, what do you do for a living?
Guy: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Guy: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Guy: Your body is like a temple.
Guy: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Guy : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
How to Tell if You're a Writer
-If you talk to yourself.
This is a really cute, true poem.
16 Things to do when you’re in Wal-Mart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
15.Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go"
16. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
"All I wanted was a warm bed, a kind word, and unlimited power." -Ashley Brilliant
Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. - Maryon Pearson
"But why is the rum gone?" -Captain Jack Sparrow
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." -Albert Einstein
Tears wash the windows of our souls so we can see ourselves more clearly. -Exodus 19:5
The white man said, "Colored people aren't allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was Black, when I grew up I was Black, when I'm sick I'm Black, when I go in the sun I'm Black, when I'm cold I'm Black and when I die I will be Black. But you sir, when you're born you're Pink, when you grow up you where White, when you're sick you're Green, when you're in the sun you're Red, when you're cold you're Blue, and when you die you will be Purple. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man turned around and sat down, and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism.
Did you know...
Kissing is healthy.
94% of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.
A good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.
Boys aren't worth your tears.
What a Boyfriend SHOULD do:
When she walks away from you mad, follow her
When she stares at your mouth, Kiss her
When she pushes you or hits you, Grab her and don't let go
When she starts cussing at you, Kiss her and tell her you love her
When she's quiet, Ask her what's wrong
When she ignores you, Give her your attention
When she pulls away, Pull her back
When you see her at her worst, Tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start crying, Just hold her and don't say a word
When you see her walking, Sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she's scared, Protect her
When she lays her head on your shoulder, Tilt her head up and kiss her
When she steals your favorite hat, Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night
When she teases you, Tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesn't answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay
When she looks at you with doubt, Back yourself up
When she says that she likes you, she really does more than you could understand
When she grabs at your hands, Hold hers and play with her fingers
When she bumps into you, bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes, don't look away until she does
When she misses you, she's hurting inside
When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away
When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers
Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.
When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
When she says she's ok, don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 years later she'll remember you
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
Treat her like she's all that matters to you.
Tease her and let her tease you back
Stay up all night with her when she's sick
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid
Give her the world
Let her wear your clothes
When she's bored and sad, hang out with her
Let her know she's important
Kiss her in the pouring rain
When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
ThInGs To PoNdEr:
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
AND THE GREATEST QUESTION EVER!!
If a hen and a half can lay an egg and a half in a day and a half, how long does it take a grasshopper with a wooden leg to kick all the seeds out of a dill pickle?
Quotes that I really Like From Shows I Really Like
Stargate SG1 (Yes I realize there are a lot, the show went on for 10 seasons people)
From The Enemy Within
Jack to Kawalsky: "If you dont make it - can I have your stereo?"
Jack: "You really think that this is the miracle drug that the world has been waiting for?"
From The Broca Divide
Jack: "Teal'c! Doc! Open the door! Teal'c!"
Daniel: Hathor was the Egyptian goddess of fertility, inebriety, and music.
Jack: You wouldn't think jagged bone digging into raw nerve would hurt, but it does.
(Jack has a broken leg, and Sam is trying to set and splint it.)
Jack and Sam are stuck in Antarctica and must lay close to share body heat.
From The Fifth Race
Jack:"There is nothing cruvis with me."
Teal'c is in a spacesuit preparing to go outside the Asguard ship into space. He is in the airlock.
Jack: I find that putting your fingers in your ears and humming loudly solves a whole slew of problems.
From Window of Opportunity
Jack walks into the gate control room and hands General Hammond a piece of paper
Teal'c: Should we not be helping Daniel Jackson with the translation, O'Neill?
Ba'al: Do you not know the pain you will suffer for this impudence?
Ba'al: I am Ba'al
From The Lost City
Daniel: "Sphere, planet. Label, name."
From New Order Part 2
Jack is revived without the ancient knowledge aboard Thor's ship.
Tealc, Daniel and Jack are on Thors ship and Thor just recreated the weapon Jack invented with the help of the ships computer.
From Reckoning Part 1
Jack: Sorry to keep you waiting, I was just finishing a lovely brunch!
From Reckoning Part 2
Jacob and Sam are trying to make an ancient weapon work.
Daniel and Replicator Sam are fighting in his head.
Jack and a few others rescue Siler from the replicators
Ba'al: My ship is loosing life support on many levels. My shields are failing. I can't keep this transmission up for much longer.
From The Pegasus Project
Cam: Like my grandma always said "If at first you don't succeed,"
Random Quotes throughout the show
Daniel: This tastes like chicken.
Maybourne: Teal'c. It's good to see you well.
Jack: All right, describe for me the dress your sister wore last week when I took her out.
Sam: Actually, I'm a Major now.
Jack: So, what's your impression of Alar?
Joe: Dr. Jackson, can I just say, thank goodness you're back. Not that Jonas was a bad guy, but after all you've been through together you belong here with SG-1.
Jack to Daniel: Space Monkey.
Jack (is talking about a problem): Well, I guess well just cross that bridge when we come to it.
Jack talking to Teal'c after Daniel ascends
Kinsey: I promise you, there will be an investigation into this!!
Sam: "Normally neutrinos pass right through ordinary matter, no matter how dense. I mean, something like five hundred million billion just passed through you."
Unknown person: Dr. Jackson is going to die when he sees this.
Sam and Jack are in an Asgard ship, after Sam helped the Asgard to defeat the Replicators.
Ba'al: "You dare mock me..."
Sam: "You cant be serious!"
Jack ONeill: "I'd like to apologize in advance for anything that I may say or do that could be construed as offensive as I slowly...go...NUTS!"
Tealc has started hallucinating about his wife
Tealc: "Appearances may be deceiving."
Bad guy: "No Matter what you have endured, you've never experienced the likes of what Anubis is capable of."
Jack: "Hey Rigar. Remember that whole we come in peace bit? Bite me."
Jack: "For Crying Out Loud."
Vala: Listen, we're not rejoining the fleet. You're coming with me.
Adria: Taking your life would be a waste of my time.
Vala to Daniel: I'm gonna go crazy. And I'm taking you with me.
Susan: Gastrovascular. Come on Peter, Gastrovascular.
Peter: Well is it Latin?
Edmund: is it Latin for Worst game ever invented?
Chazz: You got it easy. All you have to do is chill, until someone squishes you. (he's talking to a bug.)
Chazz: This stinks! My new family's already dysfunctional!
Chazz: Rule number one! Never interrupt the Chazz when he's in the middle of a long monologue!
Marcel: Let's just be a family again, except without the whole me being possessed thing.
Chazz: You know, I used to be just like you. An elitist snob who looked down on everyone around me. But I've changed. Know how? Now I'm a snob who only looks down on some people. Anyway, there's a lesson in there, I'm just not sure where.
Jaden: Jim, this is no time to be speaking Australian!
Syrus: All right! A new saga begins: the Syrus spin-off show! Starring Syrus and only Syrus!
Burgundy: You throw like an Ojama!
Hassleberry: Never trust three mutants in bikini briefs.
Chazz: When they said that you hit puberty, that was a rumor.
Chazz: We may be one man down, but we're five men strong! Well, four men, and a lovely lady. All right, three men, a lady, and Syrus!
Jaden: They dress weirder than Dr. Crowler.
Chazz: I'm not perfect and I don't care!
Jesse: You're the grown-ups here, right? Do something grown-up-ish!
Chazz: Yes, you. How did you not realize that? Were you on another planet? Jaden: Actually I was. Chazz: Why do I bother? Jaden: Ooh, I get it, you meant that as an insult didn't you Chazz?
Jaden: Wait a sec, I'm confused. Chazz: Yeah, what else is new?
Zane: Meet the new me. Thanks to duels like this, your brother was reborn. Syrus: Uh, happy birthday?
Slade: Congratulations, you can add. But tell me little brother, how's your subtraction? Give Chazz a lesson Dragoon, take out his last monster! -little clouds appear- What are these things? Chazz: It's multiplication.
Hassleberry: Cards that talk? Monster spirits? What kinda fool you think I am? Aster: Hassleberry, I don't think you want me to answer that so let's move on.
Crowler: Oh Jaden my boy! Syrus: He's being nice, something's wrong.
Bastion: Wait, if this isn't a Shadow Game, how did he shroud the Duel Arena in darkness? Would someone care to... explain that? Random Sailor: Sir, we've fixed the lights in the arena. Chazz, Alexis, Bastion: -anime fall-
Chazz: First of all, it's The Chazz, and second of all, what do you know about style? You have purple hair and you're wearing my mom's old living room curtains. Well guess what? It's time for a makeover. Adrian: What's that supposed to mean? Chazz: I'm not sure.
Jaden: Didn't you know Chazz? When Hero Spirit's out, if a hero gets destroyed all damage goes to zero, zilch, zip, nada. Chazz: Congratulations you can use a thesaurus.
Jaden: And now Chazz, you're in for some heartbreak! uh, actually that doesn't make any sense. uh, just attack.
Jaden: Let's Duel! Chazz: What do you think we've been doing? North Academy Crowd: (Laughing)
Syrus: If you ask me it's just a pathetic attempt by some loser to make friends. Wish I'd thought of it.
Syrus: Hahaha. I think rhyming's funny.
Ojama Yellow: I know him! he's the one whos richer, smarter and more famous than you! (To Chazz)
Chazz: there's only room for one spoiled rich kid at this school and that's me.
Ojama Yellow: Not again! I hate it when he conjures lightning.
Jaden: Wow. Chazz is kickin' butt and he hasn't even played his Ojamas yet. Jesse: But I thought you said those were his favourite cards? Jaden: They are. but they have this love-hate thing. Jesse: he hates his monsters? Sheesh, that boy's got some issues.
Jesse: The Chazz? Jaden: Yeah haven't you noticed? Chazz spends the majority of his time thinking of ways to prove he's cooler than everyone else. He even made up his own cheer. Show him Sy. Syrus: Chazz it up! Chazz it up! Chazz it up! Jesse: not bad. wish I could afford a cheer like that.
Jesse: I did it! I completed the Crystal beast deck! Axel: Alright. You all done talking to the sky over there? Jesse: Yeah.
Quotes from Yu-Gi-Oh
Joey: Nobody but nobody calls me a nobody you bunch of nobodys.
Seto: Don't you have someone else to annoy?
lights go out in the arena
Joey: Say what?! Am I going nuts, or did Kaiba just admit he was wrong?!
Seto: Me? Duel you? I'd have more of a challenge playing solitaire.
Joey: Are we going, or what?
"If you dweebs start holding hands, I'm outta here." - Seto Kaiba
Quote from Ice Age (I'm sorry but this is too funny)
Sid: Call me Sid, Lord of the flames!
Quotes from my friends
Jessica: I'm going to eat your beads! (one of my friends was throwing beads at her to annoy her)
Kayko: I'm texting Leady (my calculator. it's covered in lead from my pencils. People in my science class were texting so she said this. don't know why)
Sorcha: You crazy Amazon Lady. (My new nickname apparently)
Jessica: "It's actually kinda comfy in here."(we had to mummify her in History, so she’s all covered in toilet paper and laying on desks)
Sorcha: "I thought you said the sphinx was in your bathroom." (history class)
Kayko and Jessica: "Tropical Passion, You know you want one." (Jessica's juice was tropical passion so they made up a slogan for it.)
Kayko: He that's the him or he that's the they? (We were trying to figure something out)
Kay: Turtles are the cockroaches of the ocean (Don't even go there)
Kay: You're lie retarded (English class joke)
Kay: Oh! Page 20! (She has a romance novel that really gets going early on)
Kayko: "Thou shalt not speak without raising Thous Hand." (We had to come up with laws for our class room Like Hammurabi did for ancient Mesopotamia so this was one of hers)
Sorcha: "Your day will be better with a candy cane." (I have no idea where this came from)
Kayko and Kay: "We have the same name. We're homogenius!" (They both have the same name, Kayla. Misspelled on purpose)
Sorcha: "The Beavers own Canada." (My Friends and I pretend that we own parts of the world. Like my friend Kay is Queen of the World and King of Scotland (we don't make sense at all) Sorcha and Kayko are knights of Scotland, She's also a princess of Scotland. Kayko's also an Arabian Princess/Sun God, I rules England (Obviously) and Egypt, Kayko rules France and Holland, Jessica rules Atlantis And I forget what everyone else rules. And I think someone said that they wanted Canada but we're like no one can own Canada. So Sorcha said this.
Sorcha: "Orange Juice and Broccoliflower." (apparently broccoliflower is real)
Kayko: "Don't read aloud when I'm eating noodles" (Kay was reading a dirty part from a book while she was eating mac&cheese)
Kayko and I: "We will change Henry to Chuck 2, the Sequel." (it was a combined effort. Henry is from the Luxe Series and Chuck is from Gossip Girl. We all want Chuck but we would settle for Henry. However Kayko and I decided to change his name because Henry makes us think of King Henry VIII and us getting our heads chopped off so we changed it to Chuck which is way cooler.)
Jessica: "Why did Ralph jump over the rock" Kay: "He's Twelve and nude what do you expect him to do?" (This is in reference to Lord of the Flies)
Kayko: "Squishy Pillow!"(She has one of those pillows with the tiny bead things inside, and she and I were really hyper and camping and everything we said made us laugh, this was one of the things that we couldn't stop laughing about. There’s kind of a story behind it but I'm not going to put it b/c is a bit weird.)
Me: "I want to be cremated and have my ashes scattered over the ocean" Kayko: "So the fishies can eat them?"(In World History Class, now that was a fun and crazy class. Sorcha, Jessica, Kayko and I were always insanely hyper in that class. And liked to bother (jokingly) this guy who we called Jacob Black and made a whole story up for him. He and Jessica regularly insulted each other.)
Kayko: "Had to snap." (I said something and then she kind of snapped her fingers and I looked at her and she was like had to snap. You had to be there)
Kayko: I have the library in my locker. (she has like ten books in there)
Me: "Unopen minded"
Kayko to Kay: "You enjoy her birthday as opposed to your own?" She was saying that she couldn't wait until my birthday and was really excited and Kayko was asking what about your birthday.
Kay: "Teenage boys...almost as bad as girls"
Kay: "We don't care how he feels, we care how...the water bottle feels" (he was Sorcha's boyfriend)
Kay: "I am ignored and undervalued." (Her Accounting Teacher walked away from her when she was asking him a question)
Kayko: "Don't attempt to understand what you can't" (I forget the situation)
Kay: "He has a monkey. A MONKEY!!" (In the book Only a Duke Will Do, Simon has a monkey)
Kay: "Virgins are such whores" (just being Kay)
Me: "She dislocated his jaw." Kay: "That’s hot." (In 'A Hunger like no other' when Emma punches or kicks Lachlan)
Kay: "I hate your stupid plants!" (She was Marie Antoinette and Kayko was the author. From a book on Marie Antoinette, her husband Louis was always talking about his plants and she was pretending to be interested.)
Kay: "Aids is the new emo"
Faith: "The Hot Dog Guy"(she was reading the funny/embarrassing stories in the magazines and instead of Hot Guy she said the Hot Dog Guy, we could not stop laughing about it.)
Me to my brother: "Because I can, I will and I want to."
Kayko: “The Jeopardy theme song is playing through my head right now.” (In English class Kayko and I were trying to think of an answer to a question and we were kind of sitting in silence when she said this.)
Me: Kayko you're crooked. Kayko: Can you uncrooked me? (This was in English class. When we got to class Kayko's desk was crooked.)
Jasmine: I'm feeling straight today. (She meant that in the direction way but I totally took it the wrong way.)
Kayko, Jessica and Me: We'll discuss it at the meeting.
And now...for the best sentence ever made...
Her lips thinned in irritation as he watched her dot when I banged on the door and my house blew up. (There is a long story of how this sentence came to be. It's basically a collaboration of two books 000Kayko000 and I read and French class. I know, we're weird. We have accepted this, so should you.)
Kay: Lady Shadow Dancer (Shades), Kayko: 000kayko000, Jessica: Gossiper101
If you think I am an absolute obsessed geek because I have the above, copy this and the above into your profile. :D.
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