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Author has written 3 stories for Lord of the Rings.
Name: Extinction of the Gummy Bears
Real name: I'm not gonna tell you, stalker-face!
Favorite Book(s): the Lord of the Rings trilogy, The Hobbit, Inkheart trilogy, Gemma Doyle Trilogy, The Kite Runner, A Thousand Splendid Suns, The Pellinor series, The Princess Bride, The Sword of Truth series, Iron Fey trilogy, the Dresden Files, Harry Potter
Favorite Movie(s): LoTR (duh!), The Hobbit, The Princess Bride, Chucky movies, Inkheart, Star Dust, Pirates of the Caribbean, Anything Tim Burton, Anything with any of the actors/actresses in my list.
Favorite Music: Anything
Favorite Band(s)/Artists: Nickelback, Lifehouse, Adam Lambert, Cascada, Howard Shore, Alan Menken
Favorite Animals: Dogs, cats, turtles, penguins, piggies, bunnies, and snickens (A cross between a snake and a chicken. Has yet to be discovered)
Favorite TV shows: Criminal Minds, Project Runway, The Big Bang Theory, Law and Order SVU, Pit bulls & Parolees, Pit Boss
Favorite actors/actresses (Get ready for an epic list): Viggo Mortensen, Liv Tyler, Sean Bean, Ian Holm, John Noble, Karl Urban, Miranda Otto, Hugo Weaving, David Wenham, Elijah Wood, Ian McKellen, John Rhys-Davies, Cate Blanchett, Andy Serkis, Brad Dourif, Craig Parker, Orlando Bloom, Dominic Monaghan, Billy Boyd, Sean Astin, Bernard Hill, Christopher Lee, Paul Bettany, Shemar Moore, Matthew Gray Gubler, Kristin Chenoweth, Idina Menzel, Heath Leger, Ben Barnes, Darren Criss
My new obsessions: TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES, A Very Potter Musical, Jenna Marbles, Pit bulls
Let us start with the basics: I am a girl. I am 19. I work at a nursing home, full of awesome people. Favorite resident: Franky Wittaker, a ladies man from WWII with the classic curvy woman tattoo on his arm.
I have an amazing boyfriend by the name of Joe. Some of his more...odd quotes are in the quotes section that follows.
I'm a rather odd person I spose...according to my family anyways, and they wonder where I get it from! But I love them to death, and I try to incorporate them into my stories as much as possible. And while we're on the subject, I recently lost my older cousin, D.J., we group up together, along with his brother and mine. He had a bad heart, and he was just far too young to go at the age of 23. So I would like to dedicate all of my stories to him. Rest in peace D.J., you were like an elder brother to me.
I have two cats, Madam Houdini (Dini) Leann-cat is mine and Sir Swagger-butt (Swag) Fitzgerald is Joe's. I've got two dogs an pure-bred Siberian Husky named Frosty (Poof, for me. She's got a lot of hair) and a Black Lab-Border Collie mix named Flip-Flop (Moof, cause she groans in her sleep and sounds like a cow. And it had to rhyme with Poof.)
Gandalf is my hero, as is Ian Mckellan and J.R.R Tolkien.
Madam Slow-poke over here just got into Harry Potter. Currently on the third book, and so far the Chamber of Secrets is my least favorite. Why? Gilderoy Lockhart, that's why.
I use Fanfiction for the purpose of I JUST WANT TO BE THERE! And that's all I have to say about that.
I have an unusual knack for knowing all about pop culture, and making references to that. I read a lot and remember almost everything I read, in the sense of reading for fun. Can't tell you jack-shit about 1984, any actual history before World War II, and I can't math.
If I were to go horrid fan-girl-you-want-to-shoot-me-in-the-face-with-4,000 pounds-of-bricks-mode it would be the Avengers. Seriously, if I got the chance I'd have an orgy with the Male Avengers, I'd be all up in that. Joe says it's kinda weird, but he'd do it with Scarlett Johansson, Jennifer Aniston and Milla Jovovich, just saying.
My dad is overly proud of the fact that I know every word to Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen and Ramble On by Led Zeppelin. If you're a huge Ringer go listen to Ramble On and the Battle of Evermore by Led Zeppelin. Tell me if you catch some references ;D.
Guilty of: Wearing dresses after vowing not to, collecting ribbon, collecting rubber ducks, and having four three inch binders full to the breaking point of paper.
I do write original works, but I have not posted anything on Fanfiction's sister site, fictionpress. Nothing is ready, and sometimes I'm overwhelmed by all my ideas for original stories.
Also, Joe is kinda my beta reader, I force him to read everything I write. So if there are mistakes, let me know for sure, but blame Joe, cause he's supposed to read it over while I'm at work so I can post when I get home. :/
Anyway, that's enough for now.
"Muffs!"- Chad Kroger (Said in a recent concert)
"It wouldn't be an irrational fear of bees if I could pull myself together, would it?" -Charlie Pace
"Guys? Is this normal; this whole day changing into night, end-of-the-word-type weather? Guys?" -Charlie Pace
"You don't know me! I'm a bloody rock god!" -Charlie Pace
"You want to hear the part about me nearly being killed by the flaming fireball or the flying fork?" -Charlie Pace
"You climb it. What if I don't? You going to beat me with your Jesus stick?" -Charlie Pace
"Locke? The guy's a freak of nature. Highly disturbed. Chances are he probably killed all his mates at the post office the day his mum forgot to put a cookie in his lunch tin." -Charlie Pace
"Yeah, I know, I get it. You're going to go in your little magic hut and I'm going to stand out here in case you devolve into a monkey. "- Charlie Pace
"Why am I afraid of the dark? Because of the inherent absence of light." -Spencer Reid
"Oh Reid, I love it when you say butts." -Penelope Garcia
"I'm Italian, it knows better."-David Rossie
"Fool of a Took"- Gandalf
"Demonizer, demonizer! oh! you're a demonizer! you you you are you you you are!"- Krissy's and Mine. (Referring to our 9th grade English teacher!)
"He's a nut!"- Mine and Kara's (Referring to our P.E teacher aka Mr. Wells)
"Right! Where are we going?"- Pippin
"Certainty of death, small chance of success. What are we waitin' for?" -Gimli
"Game over"- Legolas
"Mind who you're sweet-talking!"- Sam
"I think I've found the bottom!" - Frodo
"Hah! Legolas breaks up yet another couple!"-Mel and mine. (referring to our friend's breakup cause she liked Legolas too much)
"You stupid girl!"- Farid (from the Inkheart movie)
"I do not want to go back into my stinking book!"- Farid (Inkheart movie)
"And Daddy! They took my boot!!" -Jane from Tarzan
"Why is the rum gone?"- Captain Jack Sparrow
"I've got a jar of dirt!"-Captain Jack Sparrow
"Are you insulted by my loveryness?"-Mine
"...I'm as content as a cucumber..."-Captain Jack Sparrow
"Shoot him, cut out his tongue then shoot his tongue! Then trim that scraggly beard!" -Captain Jack Sparrow
"Oy! My pistol!"- Captain Jack Sparrow
"Have you any idea why a raven is like a writing desk?"- The Mad Hatter
"Doesn't this guy own a shirt?"- Edward Cullen
"What a marshmallow."- Jacob Black
"I kissed Bella. And then she broke her hand, punching my face. It was all a misunderstanding."- Jacob Black
"8:30, the Royale. Wear a jacket." -Watson
"I wonder if they'd let me and Watson dissect your brain. After you've hanged of course." -Holmes
Watson: Get that out of my face.
"I do not answer to that tone." - Austin Scarlett
"You might doubt that you're cool because you draw or paint. But you are. It might just take a little while for others to see it." -Mondo Guerra
"I don't know exactly where ideas come from. It's just a matter of us figuring out how to receive the ideas waiting to be heard." -Jim Henson
"Cause baby you're a firework. Come on show 'em what you're worth!" -Katy Perry
"Stick that in your pipe and smoke it." -Kristen Chenoweth
"At least I don't talk to my Legolas poster." -me
"Spikidush!" -My cousin Breanna Marie Ball
"It's a little thing they invented back in the 60's. It's called joggin'. You'll love it." -Mathew Ferrell
"You talk to me like that and I'll punch you in the heart." -Pete Holmes
"Who's gonna tell me 'no'? You? I'll kill you." -Pete Holmes
Me: If I were Legolas, you'd be Gimli.
"It's like school pictures, but for camp...on facebook." -My loser brother Derek.
Teacher: Quiet! This is a fire drill!
Cate: Yo tengo un amigo en mis pantalones.
"Thanks for noticing me." -Eeyore
"T-I- double GUH-ER. That spells Tigger!"-Tigger
Tigger:Hello, I'm Tigger...Who are you?
"If I randomly start laughing, it's time for you to start running." -Me
"Even the strongest person needs to cry."-I Don't Know
"And you sir are very attractive, therefore I will stare at you." -Flair on Facebook
Piglet: How do you spell love?
Kara: Can you get pregnant from a toy?
"Do you think I could find a picture of that?" -Kara
Me: *Poking PB&J Sandwich*
"I'm blonde! You can't hold me to that!" -Kristina
"Every time I come down here it's like kindergarten roundup!" -Mr. Schmidt
Gilmore Girls: Suddenly wake up:
Maria: I want to grow facial hair.
"Are you a serial killer?" -Maria.
"The vanilla soft serve is on drugs!"-Maria
Me: *Licks mini crunch bar* Preciousssssss!
Me: did you videotape the falling of the tree?
Gollum: We can't eats hobbit food!
"They're going to try my pie and their heads are going to explode into AWESOME!! BOOOM!!"-Joe
Me: You're a brat.
"Babies are freshest after eight hours!"-Joe
"Some dumb fuck fuck."-Joe
"Oh, we're all going to die in an ambush because you're fucking stupid! *Baby voice* That's Cuuuute"-Joe
"We like to share our fat with other people."- Drew
"Love takes off the mask that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within."- James A. Baldwin
"Paranoid? Probably. But just because you're paranoid doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about to eat your face." -Harry Dresden
"A Balrog happens when you leave a ginger out in the sun too long." -Joe
"You sure you aren't going to breathe yourself into a coma?"-Joe
"How do you know this? Do you work for Al Quaida, you freaking terrorist?"- Brandon What's-his-junk
"You musta had some really good crack last night."-Curtis Bell (school hall monitor)
"I don't even know what I'm talking about. I think I'm dumb." -Kara
"You know he died right? He sank in lava! You can't come back from that!" -Raina (talking about Gollum)
Puck:"Hey ice-boy! You okay? You've got your brooding face on again."
"I'm going to kill you one day."-Ash
Me:"I shaved my legs today!"
"Do you think our parents miss us when we're at school?"-Kara
"Our faces should have children! Lovely face children!"-Kara
"...adorable little baby angel muffin..."- Some lady on the TV
"Give me your kissable face!" -Joe (boyfriend)
"You're a special little munchkin aren't you?"-Cate
"One does not simply take themselves seriously"-Cate
"That would be voluntary man slaughter...er child slaughter!"-Alex
"I like the sun, it's like tanning." -Whitney B.
Me:"I demand equality for people who eat chili dogs differently!"
Me: "Fuck yeah! Sugar crush!!"
Me: "I know karate! I was a yellow belt!"
Me: "Will you share the umbrella?"
Me: *Crawls under a table* CATE!!! Come join me under the table of doom!
"I'm getting fat! Look at my boobs!!"-Keebah
Life is short, live it. Love is rare, grab it. Anger is bad, dump it. Fear is awful, face it. Memories are sweet. Cherish them...
"You are ridiculous and beardy." -youtube comment
"A little bit of Doctor Who in my life,
A little bit of Castiel by my side,
A little bit of Harry's all I need,
A little bit of Merlin's all I see,
A little bit of Robin Hood in the sun,
A little bit of Loki all night long,
A little bit of Fellowship here I am,
A little bit of feels makes me your fan!" -YouTube Comment. (Sing to Mambo No. 5)
Me: Why are you under the blanket?
My brother and I are watching the Return of the King. Cue Eldarion frolicking.
Derek: Who is that?
Homecoming week. Ms. Young is wearing a Packers sweater.
Random kid in the hallway: Hey, you missed ugly sweater day.
AP Lit: Day of tornado drill:
"We've got just a few minutes until the tornado comes so...VOCAB QUIZ!" -Mr. Sneathen
After writer's club. It's pouring rain:
Madi: Waiting for your rides girls?
At the city park:
Me: Let's be kids again!
Me: I'll do what hacking want.
Funny things that happen in class:
T.J.: Can I get a drink?
Mr. Nolting: and what do you get from the Middle-east?
Me: *Just chilling in class. Htoo walks in*
Mr. Schmidt: yeah well, you sing karaoke, kids record you, you're on youtube a week before Vegas. Schmidt happens...
Random kid in class via 'textmail': Is that Schmidty or Frodo?
Morgan: I don't watch movies like that. I have never watched Pirates of the Caribbean, The Lord of the Rings nothing. I liked the Justin Bieber movie though.
Josh: How's your Spanish coming along Ryder?
Things I shouldn't do at work:
1. Making Zombie eating noises is disgusting.
FANFICTION- UNITED NATIONS!! Has anyone else noticed how a lot of us get along and make friends on here and we can be from completely different countries? WTF!? We're here making world peace on the INTERNET and we have all those ambassadors and senators and whatever struggling with it!! If you realize this (or read this and agreed) copy and paste this and add your name and country (country is optional) to the list. SPREAD THE PEACE!!: Naruto-fan-Okami-chan (USA), NaraTemari011 (Puerto Rico), Lala girl in Lalaland (USA), Kakashi Forever (England) Anime895(USA), Starwatcher-shadow (Belgium), icyprincess1 (USA), Girl With The Wolves (USA), Extinction of the Gummy Bears (USA),
Top 10 reasons you know you're obsessed with LOTR when your expressions have expanded to:
10. Calling everything 'my precious' or you find yourself saying 'gollum, gollum'.
Top Ten Ways to turn a date offer down:
10. Not for all the tobacco in the Shire.
Top Ten LotR-related behavior changes:
10. You have a giant spider for a pet.
You may be obsessed with Lord of the Rings if:
You know you're a writer
-If you talk to yourself. (Alll the time...Shakes head sadly)
-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. ‘I wonder why I talk to myself so much?’) (All the time again...)
-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. ‘Okay, so you're telling me that, if all the dustmites in two square feet were to suddenly tackle glomp each other they'd become visible?’)
-If, after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, ‘Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!’
-If you live off of sugar and caffeine.
-If people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet.
-If your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
-If, when replying to someone else’s e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether.
-If, you tend to collect every rock you can find, to the point that it ANNOYS everyone, even your own mother and other peoples' mother.
-If, no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper.
-If, the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard.
-If people think you might have O.C.D.
-If you think it’d be cool to have O.C.D.
-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense.
-If you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no ‘apparent’ reason.
-If your friends don’t even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason.
-And finally, the number one way to tell if you’re a good writer: If you failed English
1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
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