On Halloween 1994, Harry learns his mind isn't his own. On Samhain morn, he vows to question everything. Armed with logic and an unlikely ally, Harry makes a last ditch bid to reclaim his life. The goal: survive at all costs.

It's twenty one years later and for the sake of his daughter, Dudley is going to have to learn about the Wizarding World after all.

SSHP. To avoid the machinations of the Ministry, Harry must marry a reluctant Severus Snape. But marriage to Snape is only the beginning of Harry's problems. Voldemort has returned, and before too long Harry's marriage may determine the world's fate.

In which Nibelheim never happens, because Zack is a puppy, and the problem with puppies is that puppies try to eat EVERYTHING.

AU. Years of being bullied for his smarts left him dreading when people figured out he was a genius. What better way to throw them off then by acting stupid? Enter: Dumb Blond Spencer Reid. RE-EDITED.

Post-DH, Hermione confronts the post-war world, including the wizarding War Crimes Trials of 1999, rogue Dementors, werewolf packs, and Ministry intrigue. All is not well, and this is nothing new. Rated M for later chapters.

In canon, healers and mediwitches were seemingly spared from the predations of the Death Eaters during both Blood Wars. St. Mungo's would have been a very soft target, but it stood inviolate. One patient was attacked, but the hospital and it's staff were spared. The question is, why? What could have kept mad killers in check? As with a great many other things, Poppy knew.

Hermione overhears something she shouldn't concerning Professor Snape and decides that maybe the House-elves aren't the only ones in need of protection.

After the Forest of Death, Sakura comes to realize that being weak is no longer an option. However, she finds that change is sometimes painful and that truth doesn't always come easy. Luckily, she'll have some help along the way.

When Harry finally accepted the fact that he had stopped aging, ten years had passed and he knew it was time to leave. AU.

[FANOWRIMO CHALLENGE] Most people seem to think that developing a doujutsu is a wondrous, unspeakably lucky occurrence. Considering that she now has to deal with an ability she has no idea how to use, family drama, fashion crises, and the world's most rude and vulgar doctor, on top of getting to know her new genin team just after graduation...needless to say, Sakura begs to differ.

Steve has a routine, and god help him if he's going to break that routine for anyone - yes, that includes you, Tony. Enter a local barkeeper with a penchant for the occult and the gift of good conversation. EWE, not slash, just a couple of guys and a few hundred drinks. Rated for fear of the thought police.

After fourteen years in hiding, Emily Prentiss thought she and her daughter were safe. But Doyle has found them, and now there's nowhere to run but home. Sequel to The Phoenix's Child. Epilogue posted, and COMPLETE!

Normal people didn't have to worry about this sort of thing when they go on vacation. They worry about things like losing their luggage, catching a cab or something similar. Not alien invasions. Harry, however, had never been normal. Then again, neither were these guys. One-shot

Post Tarsus IV, Riley get assigned to the Enterprise. He hasn't forgotten the color of those eyes. A Conscience of the King Prequel.

Harry has to marry a witch for the good of Wizarding Britain. Harry does not like this.

Sarah Dursley, daughter of Dudley, is ready for an exciting first year at Hogwarts. However, a mysterious outbreak of destructive and mysterious fires and the conniving of an obsessed Head Girl may force her to disturb her bliss to save the school.

The wizard world has always demanded the blood, sweat and tears from Harry and now they're demanding one more thing.

Severus and Lily made up before the Potters died.Positive that Harry is being pampered more then his Godson Draco Malfoy, Severus doesnt look into it.But something Dumbledore says at an Order meeting gets to Severus...he just has to be sure he's not right

Alex was sick of being used and threatened and blackmailed and so fourteen year old Alex Rider became sixteen year old John Sanders. And now he's joined the SAS. Will he be able to keep his secret? Or will MI6 find him?

Luna wants to have a better third year, so she asked her Daddy what to do.

It was an unspoken rule between the Holmes brothers that one did not mention their father. John was beginning to understand why. He also gets to meet Mummy. Great fun is had by all. Particularly Mycroft. SH/JW Slash.

People pick up traits of their mentors. Naruto has a frogshaped wallet and a perverted jutsu. Sasuke has homicidal urges and a tendency to scare little boys. And I’ve suddenly become the Legendary Sucker and could really use a strong drink.

Alex is conned into a hiking vacation in the Brecon Beacons National Park. And for once, the trouble that finds him has nothing whatsoever to do with his secret occupation as Super Spy – merely a horrendously bad streak of luck.

Hogwarts's education was useless in preparing students for real-life tasks, such as a tri-wizard tournament. What should Harry do?

Cinderella rewrite. Because fifteen minutes isn't always enough time to fall in love, a Fairy Godmother isn't a genie, and even a prince has to prove himself.

Sherlock is diagnosed with a terminal illness. Warning: angst like whoa.

AU time travel: The kyuubi no kitsune knew something was wrong, but couldn't put a paw on quite what. However, there are benefits to being a force of nature, including time itself bending to accommodate you. Edited version on AO3!

The Academy's teachers thought they were getting one over on the Hokage, graduating an ill-prepared Naruto while Iruka was sick. The Hokage knew he was getting one over on the entire village when he assigned Morino Ibiki as Naruto's Jounin sensei.

Mycroft is abducted by aliens. It's quite possibly the worst thing that's ever happened... to the aliens.

Trapped in a quagmire of suspicion after a mission's disastrous results, Sakura misplaces her sanity. What else can a mere pawn in a game of theft, sabotage, and scientific experiments do? Here, the dead speak. KakashiXSakura & minor KibaXSakura

He's done it. He's just five years old, but he's finally done it. The Dursleys are gone. And now he's with a new family who seems just as twisted as he is. How strange.

Cloud has an accident with a Time materia. There are people to save, and for that, some people need to die.

*Complete* Every journey has to start somewhere. This one began when Penny found an alternative to paintball, and Sheldon dusted off an old skill.

He never got over her death. Not really. He never got over the fact that he didn't say goodbye. It changed him in many ways and for many reasons. AU take on things.

HPDM slash. Harry decides to do something about the mistreatment of Slytherins in Hogwarts after the war. He could have chosen easier tasks. Such as climbing Mount Everest. COMPLETE.

Jim still sort of likes away missions, even so.

I was once asked to write a Marriage Law Challenge fic by someone who loves a sad tale. This short story is it. Angst, Character Death. Tissues recommended. COMPLETE

Hufflepuff is the house of the leftovers, the losers, the forgotten. Well, Tom Riddle thinks, it's time to change that.

Duo Maxwell, Boredom, and Red Sharpie Markers. Sigh, perhaps they should give him more to do on missions so these things don't happen.

Years ago, Alice had a vision: Edward would find a mate at Christmas. After decades of trying to dissuade his meddling family by bringing home the vilest girls he can find, Edward happens upon a bitter old woman & awakens to what could've been.AU;OOC;O/S

Iruka's genin team was never normal, by any definition of the word.

Shino probably just wasn't in the habit of talking any more than necessary, but he was going to have to make an effort for her sake, Tenten decided.

Getting to know new neighbours is sometimes a complicated process.

Dating's tough when you're Harry Potter. Ron watches his best friend go through some very bad dating experiences, while going through some awkward ones of his own. H/R slash. Please note the rating and warnings inside.

Growing up through a young boy's eyes. The trials of becoming a hero.

-OR- The BAMF Adventures of Kirk and Sulu. Shenanigans abound!

It really does take a village to raise a Jim.

One Shot. AU. After all, every child deserves a mother who loves them. Even those who grow up to be monsters. Luna just never imagined things would turn out this way. Time Travel.

He is foreign to this new world, a world so similar to his own and yet so different. His name is Harry Potter. His new destiny is unknown. All that is known is his world has been torn asunder and nothing of who he is remains. What is Harry Potter to d

Eight years is a long time. Penny/Sheldon Note: Thanks to Karanguni for the fantastic and thorough beta job.

Crack oneshot. Malcolm Baddock fails at office warfare, and Harry teaches his desk to speak.

The road of life is easier to walk with a traveling companion. Some friendships occur naturally and spontaneously. Others take more time and effort, and occasional manipulation from the local expert in psychological torture. This is one of those times.

Ennui is an unavoidable feature in a summer spent taking care of a rehabilitating brother. Never did it occur to Temari to think that finding a pen pal in an eccentric soldier on the other side of the world might help cure it. AU.

In which Linus faces up to some truths. Warnings for violence. One-shot

Harry should know better than to conceal mysterious body art from dorm-mates who pay no heed to what happened to the cat. Oneshot. AU, 7th year fluffy!verse. Cracky. HPDM.

ONESHOT: Before Bella, another family attracted the attention of the Cullen clan. Only, Harry Potter's family reacted somewhat differently...

Raj can suddenly talk to Penny and he is determined to find out why this change happened. Penny/Sheldon-ish

The war is over, and the recovering Wizarding Community adopts a new Marriage Law to cope with the sudden rise of bloodsicknesses. Poor Oliver, he's about to find out that the consequences of doing the right thing can get very out of hand! Not HBP Com.

Harry Potter never had much luck, being sent to his parents’ past should have been expected. 'Complete' Time travel fic.

Fifteen-year-old Sakura never expected to become a traitor to her village, but in a Konoha ruled by Danzou, she has no other choice. Finding her path entangling with the village's most infamous renegade, though, was another story entirely. ItaSaku AU.

Not all of James died that night. Not all of Harry lived. The Triwizard Tournament as it should have been and a hero discovering who he really wants to be.

AU cliche. When the Sandaime fell, a nightmare descended upon Konoha. But on the day the nightmare began, no one noticed that one teacher's aid and a few young children disappeared. That simple fact may be the only hope Konoha has left.

Naruto doesn't often get sick, but when he does he knows his routine: hunker down and be miserable. But this time around maybe he can finally have a taste of what others normally have. Naruto-Fluff-ness.

Reid is the only witness to a crime. If only he could remember what crime that was. Not to mention just who exactly Spencer Reid is.

Disguised as a girl, Naruto will spy on Kage level kunoichi at the Cute Polar Bear Hot Springs Festival. On a related note, Sasuke deals with his growing attration to a mysterious new kunoichi. Also, the first ever Iruka Love Polygon. That I'm aware of.

All Dudley wanted to do was deliver the letter and return to his perfectly normal, relatively pleasant existence. Luckily for him, fate and Millicent Bulstrode intervened.

In which Sakura is struck by an arrow.

After an administrative error, Iruka finds himself on an S-rank mission with Sharingan Kakashi and snobbish Anbu and, ultimately, on trial for murder. Iruka's past haunts him while Kakashi becomes unwillingly entangled in the sensei's affairs. Gen fic.

Konoha’s four beloved geniuses were not necessarily hardworking or sociable or humble or patient. But kami, weren’t they supposed to be brilliant? :SasuSaku, NejiSaku: :Shikamaru, Sakura friendship:

ONE SHOT. DM&HG. MATURE. It's the last night of school, and Hermione Granger has something to prove.

Formerly on the account of Luke Kenobi. Written for the Third Floor Corridor Cliche Contest. Harry and Snape have been sent to Azkaban on false charges. Once out, they are not what the Order expects.

Relating the story of King Edmund's first diplomatic success, how he learned a craft, and why his older brother is known throughout the Black Dwarf clan as Nancy.

After the war, Neville and Harry meet up to mock people and get drunk. It's a good life. Post-DH oneshot crackfic.

Sasuke is back. Naruto has joined ANBU. Sakura is spending more time in the hospital than in the field. Team 7 struggles to redefine itself, because sometimes you don't know what you really want after all.

Sequel to 'Mistaken Identity'. The Dunce Who Lived and his unfortunate brother have finally arrived at Hogwarts. Snape is both manipulative and placing bets. Not so oneshot.

Meet Uzumaki Naruto, the number one prankster ninja. He lives in Konoha...and has a dark secret so large that NOBODY knows, not even Naruto.

One-shot. "Raido had been telling him for years that he would end up dead in ditch somewhere if he wasn’t more careful. The only problem with his prediction was that Genma wasn’t quite dead." Genma, Sakura and a mission gone bad.

COMPLETE. Two years after defeating Voldemort, Harry falls into an alternate dimension with his godfather. Together, they embark on a new life filled with drunken debauchery, thievery, and generally antagonizing all their old family, friends, and enemies.

Vague spoilers for PS-HBP. One-shot. James Potter observes as Harry arrives to an alternate dimension where his parents are alive and Neville is the Boy-Who-Lived. Trying to teach old cliches new tricks, here.

"Of course it's missing something vital. That's the point." Dennis Creevey takes up his brother's camera after the war.

Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura, Kakashi. Friendship. A gen, but not quite, story about comrades, coming out, and cows. Now with slightly less gen sequel.

In a world where Cloud was given a chance to return to the past and make things right again, something goes a little bit wrong and leaves him in an employment he didn't quite anticipate.

ItaSaku Non Massacre AU. Prequel to thunderstorm. Sakura goes to work one day and has to deal with a most unexpected patient.

The identity of Quatre's lone bodyguard is cause for discussion among some of the Winner Family.

When a Magical game of Truth & Dare goes wrong, the Gryffindor Quidditch team must 'bare' up and face the consequences. And as the news spreads like wildfire in mmail things get quite out of control.

With only a trace left of 7th year, Hermione makes a startling discovery. She is given the task of providing her peers the sexual education they so desperately need, with Draco Malfoy as her only assistance. Too much sex talk with Malfoy can lead to interesting things... [This fic is being revised!]

When it looks like everything might be taken away, Gaara can at least be grateful that he doesn't have to meet his challenges alone. Now if he can just hold things together for long enough to figure out where Naruto went . . . GaaSaku, Finished!

When the Sound are destroyed, Tsunade lies dead. Who will be the Rokudaime Hokage?

AU: Life had Harry been able to control accidental magic. Warning: Dursleys will be terrorized.

Kakashi takes a moment to wrap his mind around equating Ino’s chest with enemy shinobi while Asuma begins beating his head against the table and groaning about how he didn’t sign up for this. Rated for language and the general horror that is puberty

Actions speak louder than words. Or in Gaara's case, sand speaks the loudest.

Duo saves a baby from a burning building, but at what cost to himself? Yaoi, 1x2

As Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger play the Harry Potter Drinking Game, they both acknowledge they want something more from each other than just friendship. DMHG

Meet Hidan, the religious fanatic. Meet Temari of the Sand, the no nonsense sister of Kankuro and Gaara. Watch what happens when they both happen to run into each other. Crackfic.

All Hyuuga are proud. Neji measures his pride differently. First in 'Matters, Secrets, and Times.'

Creating a jutsu is dangerous. Too bad an eleven year old Naruto didn't know that. AU, Naruto with MPD.

A companion peice to A Subtle Way of 'Doing Him'. Trowa always has to make things harder to do.

Oneshot PostHBP. On a joyless Christmas Eve, Hermione goes to visit the graves of the fallen. There she meets the man who destroyed her hope, and perhaps the only one who can give it back to her. 8/15/08: NOMINATED AT THE QUIBBLER AWARDS!

Set during Goblet of Fire. What if Harry had sent Hermione to solve the clue in the golden egg?

Without Sakura, Team 7 falls apart. Kakashi sees this all too well, and he's almost surprised that he can't accept it. [NaruSasu] [Implied KakaRin] [Hints of NaruSasuSaku]

[CRIMINAL MINDS] The BAU works late on Thanksgiving to finish up an important case...sort of. ONESHOT

...Fine. If you wanna die so bad, it's your call. But you gotta prove to me you're worth the effort. I'll let you fight my sister... but first, you gotta get through ME. Kankuro x Tenten [finished]

In his fifth year Harry Potter was framed for murder and sentenced to Azkaban. Ten years later his innocence is proven. What will Harry do? Written PreOotP. COMPLETE!

Narcissa watching Draco watch Hermione. She draws some very startling conclusions. One Shot. Complete.

There is an old saying in the Nara family: Don't walk with the shadows for too long, or you'll become one.

Companion fic to Keys to Diplomacy. The Hokage demonstrates unconventional methods of keeping subordinates in line. NaruSasu.

A librarian's job is never done . . . especially not at Hogwarts . . . and especially when a certain toadlike High Inquisitor is nosing around.

Calvin is all grown up... how has the passage of time affected him and those around him? My first nonStar Wars fic!

A disappearance in a nearby village leads to a greater mystery as Team 7 is forced to examine the consequences of the violence inherent in the their world.

Penny is panicking. Where is she? How did she get here? How is she going to get home and whose backside will she kick first when she does? A woman lost in Middle Earth wearing only her pyjamas. This can't be good... (STRONG language; NOT a M-Sue)

yaoi Five years after Mariemaia, Heero meets up again with the only people he ever considered friends... but Duo and Trowa have disappeared into the underworld. When did the world go wrong?

COMPLETE On Assignment for Dumbledore in the past, Harry sees his lover from an unexpected perspective. That of a teacher. HPSS SLASH!

Auror Frank Longbottom makes a hash of a young Severus Snape's life and career plans. Mention of SS/Rosier. Answer to a SnapeFF challenge.

Once upon a time a mysterious girl joined the Fellowship...damn her! Sick of annoying Mary Sues? Actually READ Tolkien? This may cheer you up.