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Author has written 17 stories for Star Wars, and Harry Potter.
Meet the Author
First of all: the pen name. In no way am I photogenic. Neither in any way am I Frodo, although I am almost short enough. Further in not any way whatsoever do I read/write LOTR fiction, although I love all things Tolkien. Basically, I just thought it would make a suitably witty pen name. It's sort of like football—the name is completely irrelevant to what actually happens. :)
I am a college grad trying to pay off student loans (therefore you should expect slow updates). Specialties are the Middle East and Biblical Literature. I have never lived in any one home longer than four years, I paint and draw, I play classical piano (don’t hold your breath for my upcoming appearance at Carnegie Hall), and I studied Ancient Hebrew FOR FUN. You heard me. Furthermore, I play a wicked game of foosball.
My writing tends toward the humorous, with a healthy dose of drama/action/adventure, and the occasional foray into the poetic (see At the End). I'd say my strengths center on dialogue and character. You are guaranteed that I will show proper respect to the English language, observing all standards of correct spelling and grammar, even if I occasionally take deliberate artistic liberties. :)
I'm criminally lazy, so I'm putting my general disclaimer of non-ownership here. I am not George Lucas. I bear no discernible resemblance to George Lucas. I did not even dress up as George Lucas for Halloween. It is entirely possible that I am allergic to flannel. I am a nut spending my time writing stories that will make me nothing. Terribly sorry to disappoint you all...
Meet What She Authored
At The End: A oneshot set during the climactic scene of ROTJ. An intentionally ambiguous piece inspired by the thought that Palpatine's words could be spoken just as accurately to Anakin as to Luke Skywalker.
Red’s the New Black: A short Harry Potter humor fic set during GOF, canon-compliant, involving Harry, Snape, assorted Weasleys, the perils of human guinea pigs, and a frenetic talking bracelet.
The Harrowing of Hermione Granger: On permanent hiatus.
Have a Nice Trip: Another oneshot inspired by the last part of ROTJ. Whereas At the End is aspiring art, this is shameless slapstick. The Emperor is overthrown by the most unlikely opponent imaginable--and Luke Skywalker thought it had to be hard...
Imperial Edict No. 1138: A humor longshot. You know all those things you love to hate about fan fiction? Bad grammar, mangled names, Mary Sue? If you've ever detested any of those, this story is for you. This guide to writing Imperially-approved fan fiction was inspired by the wonderfully therapeutic rant we had on the L/V Writers Board about the most annoying things in fan fiction, as well as Mathematica's "A Letter From the Force."
To Turn to the Dark Side, Press Three: A five-chapter humor fic about Anakin's health insurance woes following the loss of his arm in AOTC. If you've ever listened to an automated phone menu and been tempted to murder something, this story is dedicated to you.
The Care and Handling of Professor Snape: A Twenty-Five Point Guide for First Years: The title is almost longer than the actual story...salvaged from another plot bunny that was too convoluted to ever merit publication.
Lord Vader’s Limpet: Vader survives ROTJ and subsequently gets lost in the Unknown Regions for twenty-five years. When he returns, the Empire has fallen, the New Republic is in swing, and he has a new role to play: Grandpa. A fluffily humorous longshot involving Vader and two-year-old Ben Skywalker, with cameos from several of the usual suspects. L/V fans will probably enjoy.
We Happy Few: Of twelve pilots in Red Squadron, two survived the Battle of Yavin. After the jubilation wears off, Luke Skywalker and Wedge Antilles get to know one another a bit better. Title taken from Shakespeare's Henry V.
Far More Than Rubies: A full-length fic. If you, like me, loved the Force Bond series to death, and wished there was a similar story about Luke and Padme, look no further. Padme survives ROTS and six years later is reunited with Luke in a general mishmash of humor, drama, tragedy, angst, fluff, and action/adventure.
The House That Harry Built: A longshot, beginning shortly after DH and covering about seven or eight years. Harry and his houses discover that life exists after all the death; it just takes some time to start growing again. If ff.net had a genre called "reads like a violin sounds" this would go in that category. It is canon-compliant as best I could make it off the top of my head (yes, yes, I know Ginny's birthday is wrong, but give me a little artistic license, guys...).
A Dream Deferred: A brief oneshot in honor of Valentine's Day. In the four years between the two Death Star battles, Luke Skywalker saw a lot of his pilots and friends die. She was only one of them, but she was almost more. A sad almost-was fic, not quite a romance.
Sibling Revelry: Darth Vader discovers he is the father of twins a bit sooner than in the OT. Darth Vader also receives an intelligence report claiming that Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia Organa are a bit, erm, closer than previously suspected. Obviously, this does not go over well. A humor multi-chapter fic starring the usual OT canon suspects, as well as a few OCs in supporting comic roles.
RESUME FOR: Vader, Lord Darth: This fic is what happens when a snarky Vader-loving writing type applies for several dozen too many jobs in the course of six months. Sooner or later, she will sit back after poring over her resume for the billionth time and wonder to herself, "Suppose Darth Vader had a resume?" Well, now he does.
Inbox: A humor collaboration fic, co-edited/written with my never-to-be-sufficiently-praised beta Mathematica, which you will find posted on her profile (check my favorite authors tab for the link). The chapters featuring Palpatine, Boba Fett, and Jabba are from yours truly.
The Father: Full-length fic. More like three full-length fics, in fact. It's sort of Star Wars Remixed--you'll find many of the same themes, events, characters, and so on, put together in different and hopefully creative ways. Features Luke, Vader, Han, and Leia, with nearly everyone else jumping in along the way: the Lars, Obi-Wan, Lando Calrissian, Wedge Antilles, Bail and Breha Organa, Yoda, Boba Fett, the Emperor, Captain Piett, Artoo, Threepio, Ferus Olin, and so on, with cameos from Grand Admiral Thrawn, Mara Jade, Admiral Ozzel, Jan Dodonna, and any number of others, not to mention a handful of original characters. AU, obviously.
Driving Lord Vader: A humor longshot set in the same AU as Lord Vader's Limpet. Features Vader, a 16-year-old Anakin Solo, and the manly quest for a space flight license.
Meet the Skywalkers: Admiral Piett wasn't sure what he expected when the Executor finally got back from the Unknown Regions, but he definitely didn't think the first member of the welcoming committee would be notorious Rebel Jedi fugitive Luke Skywalker. A short multi-chapter fic, set in the Limpet AU.
Children of the Desolate: proposed sequel to Far More Than Rubies. A detailed outline has been drafted and I have begun work on the fic itself, but it will not be posted until it is finished so we may be talking in years still. Six years after escaping Vader in Kuat, Padme struggles to protect an extremely curious twelve-year-old Skywalker boy from the Empire, from her dark secrets, and - most dauntingly of all - from himself. The Rebel movements are on the brink of forming a unified Alliance to Restore the Republic, but a single act of treachery could destroy everything...and treachery is Darth Vader's specialty. Padme finds herself walking on the edge of a knife as she tries to evade Imperial agents, inconvenient questions, accusing nightmares, and the not-entirely-undesirable attentions of war veteran and widower Captain Lorcan Dharane...
Vader's Angels: a companion piece to Lord Vader's Limpet and Driving Lord Vader. After getting into a no-holds-barred fight with her mother way too close to the anniversary of Alderaan, Jaina decides to ditch the home front and comes knocking on Vader's door. He'd refuse, but her Plan B involves a boy from the wrong side of the tracks...
The In-Laws: A oneshot from the same AU as Far More Than Rubies and Children of the Desolate. Luke, the slimeball, takes a trip away from Yavin IV - leaving his bride of 18 months to fly solo when Padme shows up for a visit. What exactly do you say to a woman whose son you tried to kill and then married instead?