Eat a Taco
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Joined 07-05-06, id: 1082989, Profile Updated: 11-05-12
Author has written 9 stories for Harry Potter, and Pride and Prejudice.

Sing to each other like friends telling stories.

Hi, my name is Julie. I am two parts sass and one part classy. I write very little fanfiction these days are mostly this account remains as a tribute to youthful atrocity, but hey, summer is coming around, and I have returned to dabble in this once more because my writing muscles are in need of a stretch and I love everything of and relating to Jane Austen, so why don't I give it a try of my own? Exactly. So here I am, back again, wondering if there's anyone around who still remembers me/is interested in what I'm writing anymore.

I rarely sleep at night; I fear I'm becoming nocturnal. I'm a film buff and a book reader and I'm terribly afraid of bugs. Once I nearly caused a traffic accident trying to avoid a moth that had somehow entered my car. Trust me, this is not as endearing or as funny as it sounds.

I'm eighteen and too smart for my own good. At least, that's what my mother says, and I tend to believe her. As a side note, if anyone is in possession of a Mr. Thornton, Captain Von Trapp, Captain Wentworth, or Mr. Darcy, please post them to me ASAP. I seem to have misplaced them and will appreciate their speedy return.

Yours faithfully,

The Rambling Heretic


"We live our lives
like a ghost as a feast--
because it's more poetic to wish for something
than to get up and grab it."
- The All New Adventures of Us, Firetruck

"To you I shall say, as I have often said before, Do not be in a hurry, the right man will come at last." -Jane Austen

“I would believe only in a god who could dance. And when I saw my devil I found him serious, thorough, profound, and solemn: it was the spirit of gravity - through him all things fall." -Friedrick Nietzsche

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Last Drop by Phyona reviews
Sherlock and John decide to fend off boredom with a night of heavy drinking.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 22,060 - Reviews: 355 - Favs: 896 - Follows: 392 - Updated: 3/3/2012 - Published: 1/19/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
A Study in Ginger by punifa reviews
Filled for this meme: Sherlock needs to become ginger for a case, and enlists John to help dye his hair. John finds out that it's the one thing that makes Sherlock go pliant.
Sherlock - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,766 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 317 - Follows: 21 - Published: 10/29/2011 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
His Favourite Four Letter F Words by cathedral carver reviews
John isn't the most eloquent of men.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,676 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 243 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/26/2011 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
No catapult to all night kisses by cathedral carver reviews
I'm jealous of your cigarette.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,563 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/23/2011 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
One Drunken Night In Vegas by Lila Turner reviews
Instead of a Hunsford proposal, you get a Vegas proposal with an inebriated Elizabeth and Darcy. What happens to these beloved characters in this very modern, what if, version of P&P.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 96,325 - Reviews: 1442 - Favs: 544 - Follows: 725 - Updated: 6/15/2010 - Published: 2/13/2007
Mercy, Mercy Me by orchidvines reviews
Elizabeth is a gum-snapping Meryton High teen and Darcy just happens to absolutely suck at being affectionate. No big. One-shot! Hay.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,027 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 287 - Follows: 33 - Published: 5/3/2010 - Complete
Do No Harm by ingrid-matthews reviews
Some cures can't be found in a doctor's office. HolmesWatson slash.
Sherlock Holmes - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,431 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 6 - Published: 2/27/2010 - S. Holmes, J. Watson - Complete
You, Me and the Bourgeoisie by orchidvines reviews
Will Darcy had absolutely everything. Until the accident. In a glimpse of what could have been, he wakes up beside Lizzy Bennet, the artist he was supposed to dump ten years ago. The fork in his path. Still, what the hell happened to his Armani suits?
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 50,053 - Reviews: 956 - Favs: 805 - Follows: 295 - Updated: 2/7/2010 - Published: 6/17/2009 - Complete
Enough by infamouslastwords reviews
H/W slash. movie!plot canon!writing. "He motions to a painting. Upon the canvas a woman is readying herself to draw a bath. 'For example: She is as beautiful as women come. But, pray tell, what do you think was the motivation behind the painter's hand?.'"
Sherlock Holmes - Rated: M - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,659 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/20/2010 - Dr. Watson, Sherlock Holmes - Complete
Addict by CiderApples reviews
Holmes is a self-destructive drug addict because the alternative would destroy him faster. Holmes/Watson slash.
Sherlock Holmes - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,834 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 142 - Follows: 30 - Published: 1/10/2010
In the Dark by Jack of Chocolate reviews
Holmes temporarily blinds himself with chemicals and allows Watson to take the consequences. Movie-verse. Slash. Humor. Angst. Romance.
Sherlock Holmes - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,916 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 138 - Follows: 14 - Published: 1/7/2010 - Complete
Please Don't Say I Do by Irony12 reviews
I always knew the day would come when Freddie Wentworth, the love of my life, would get married. I’d assumed the occasion would pass in blissful ignorance. I didn’t, however, think I’d be attending the ceremony, much less a bridesmaid. Modern Persuasion.
Persuasion - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 4 - Words: 15,043 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 6/19/2009 - Published: 3/5/2008
Lyrical Lies by 0Life-is-a-Song0 reviews
He could make symphonies as a child with millions running on his music, demanding more and more as he did what he loved to do. Music was his passion, his love. Then some jazzed up redneck comes along, and suddenly things aren't so simple anymore.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 27,972 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 111 - Updated: 5/3/2009 - Published: 6/24/2007
Nobody Screws Up a Second Shot by non-damsel reviews
Persuasion. Cameron already has more than she can handle: no job out of college, a family that hates her, apart from one needy younger sister. And now, an exfiancé with a bestselling novel and a grudge. Maybe its karma. Or maybe its a 2nd chance
Persuasion - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 57,549 - Reviews: 901 - Favs: 335 - Follows: 193 - Updated: 4/25/2009 - Published: 4/26/2007 - Complete
Personally, I'd Rather Lick Sand by orchidvines reviews
Lizzy is feisty and spirited. Darcy, not so much.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 115,784 - Reviews: 1042 - Favs: 1,182 - Follows: 277 - Updated: 4/13/2009 - Published: 11/15/2008 - Complete
Ancient History Deserves a Helmet by orchidvines reviews
Anne Elliot, professional pushover, freelance artist, and closet cynic is about to get her clean slate. If only a certain ex would agree to bury the hatchet. Or y'know, stop being such a douchebag . Persuasion, Modern-day! Rated T for language & completed
Persuasion - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 52,461 - Reviews: 221 - Favs: 223 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 10/27/2008 - Published: 7/23/2008 - Complete
Champagne Kisses by princess.lame reviews
Welcome to Hogwarts, 1977, where we have crazy Gryffindors, cowardly Head Boys, sneaky Marauders, and champagne kisses. Lily and James, along with their friends and their weird sense of humor, draw closer during the horrible times of darkness.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 48,865 - Reviews: 136 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 3/31/2008 - Published: 7/26/2006 - Lily Evans P., James P.
The Rookie by jncar reviews
Rookie Auror Tonks learns firsthand why rules against Aurors becoming romantically involved with persons under investigation exist. A GOFera RemusTonks romance.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,559 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 161 - Follows: 7 - Published: 12/3/2006 - N. Tonks, Remus L. - Complete
Between Fidel Castro and You by Calais reviews
A fantastic, lovely story with modern twist. An unwilling Elizabeth the teacher and Darcy the shipping heir meet...will they ever get over their pride? Probably not. ....Must review.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 56,662 - Reviews: 303 - Favs: 337 - Follows: 108 - Updated: 11/27/2006 - Published: 6/15/2006 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Mortified Mine reviews
Liz Hooper: a foul-mouthed liberal arts student home for the summer with two tattoos and a drinking problem. Sebastian McCail? Not her cup of tea. Maybe he'd improve with a taste of vodka in him...
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,940 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 7/21/2011 - Published: 7/17/2011
You Aren't My Sunshine reviews
All Lizzie wants is yogurt, a road trip, and a little sunshine to wash her troubles away. But when she gets in the convertible with Jane and two random strangers, the stress increases tenfold. Between thunderstorms and Will Darcy, no one can see the sun.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,843 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 4/28/2009 - Published: 4/25/2009
Dear Girl reviews
Sequel to Dear Boy. Sometime during Half Blood Prince, Tonks writes Remus a letter. Now Remus writes back. RLNT Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,585 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/9/2007 - Remus L., N. Tonks - Complete
The Courtyard reviews
Love is not something Remus Lupin likes. So what happens when Tonks decides that she's going to get hold of this werewolf once and for all? Begining of OotP to end of HBP. COMPLETE, huge thanks readers and reviewers! Over 15,000 hits!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 35,863 - Reviews: 143 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 5/12/2007 - Published: 7/11/2006 - N. Tonks, Remus L. - Complete
Words reviews
Important words and phrases in the life of Remus Lupin.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,098 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 3/9/2007 - Published: 3/8/2007 - Remus L.
Flame reviews
It's strange what the soft light of a candle can do to someone.RLNT, sometime during HBP
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,499 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 7 - Published: 1/18/2007 - Remus L., N. Tonks - Complete
Dear Boy reviews
Some time during book six, Tonks decides to write a letter to Remus. What she comes up with is Dear Boy.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,322 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/19/2006 - N. Tonks, Remus L. - Complete
Landing His Heart reviews
RLNT ONESHOT that takes place a little while after the hospital wing scene. Because we just HAVE to wonder how in the world that they got together, because RLNT's are lost in the world of Romione and JPLE. And because they are SO CUTE. Title inspired by 3
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,324 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/26/2006 - N. Tonks, Remus L. - Complete
That Face reviews
A RemusTonks fic that takes place after their 'little argument' in the hospital wing. Tonks realizes that she has to give up Remus, and Remus realizes how much he's going to miss. ONESHOT based on a scene in The Producers.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,101 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/8/2006 - Remus L., N. Tonks - Complete