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Joined 10-02-18, id: 11271166, Profile Updated: 11-11-20
Author has written 2 stories for Harry Potter.

Loose Cannon is my first fanfic, and it's taken on a life of its own. I started it with a vague outline, but I quickly discovered that the best scenes and subplots write themselves. I've lost count of how many times the characters have surprised me with a plot twist, and I've learned to trust where they're taking the story. But this means I can't say with confidence who the final pairings will be. I'd intended Harry/Hermione, but I'm not going to shoehorn them into a relationship that doesn't work, so I'll just have to see what they decide.

One of my biggest frustrations with HP canon is that the main characters experience years of trauma, and then they immediately pair up with the British equivalent of their high school sweethearts, which seems like a recipe for stunted emotional development. Personally, I experienced huge emotional growth during my university years, and I wanted to depict something analogous. I've also woven in elements of a spiritual path, including transcendence of the conventional sense of self, which IMO is invaluable for overcoming past trauma.

As of August 2020, Loose Cannon is 950K words, and it'll easily pass 1M. Frankly, I never could have foreseen writing anything this long, but for months the story simply poured out of me. It's slowed down considerably due to pandemic stress, but I still enjoy writing and work on it nearly every day. I enjoy writing dialogue in particular, since the characters always have their own agenda. The result, I hope, is an entertaining and emotionally-rich fanfic.

Updates posted on Wednesdays. I've done my best to write it in British English, but I welcome feedback from actual Britons.

Roster of Original Characters

star* indicates Muggle

Albert Barnes* - Hermione's cousin, twin to Jenny

Alex Barrington - British/American witch, Transfiguration specialist

Alistair - Vampire proprietor of Penumbra, former Gryffindor

Allie Hobbs - Holyhead Harpies starting Seeker

Althea - Shop assistant to Benedict Thimble

Andrew Gilstrap - Montrose Magpies starting Seeker

Annie - School friend of Ryan Bellamy

Benedict Thimble - Official tailor to the Chudley Cannons

Bruce - Chudley Cannons flying trainer

Candice* - Server at the Muggle pub near the Cannons training grounds

Carl Wainwright - Tutshill Tornados starting Seeker

Cassia Dexter - Mind Healer, author of Be Your Own Niffler: Finding the Treasure Within

Catherine White - Restored member of Black family

Celia - Teenage Squib who writes to Harry for advice

Charles Selwyn - Lydia's brother-in-law

Claire - French fille de joie

Connor - Lyle’s best mate, werewolf

Daniel Granger* - Hermione’s father

Darren Rogers - Chudley Cannons starting Chaser

Darius Sprott - Chudley Cannons team manager

Davina Hampton - Light Arts instructor

Desmond Travers - Lydia's father

Ekantika Singh - Wigtown Wanderers starting Seeker

Elizabeth - A witch Harry takes home

Elliott Black - Restored member of Black family (descended from Squib)

Emily Granger* - Hermione’s mother

Eric* - Laetitia's fiancé

Ernest Prewett - Proxy member of the Wizengamot (Light)

Errol Reddington* - Former classmate/bully of Hermione

Esme (Travers) Selwyn - Pure-blood princess, Lydia's older sister

Fiona Dunning - School friend of Owen and Joanne Barrowmaker

Gary Wisenborn - Chudley Cannons starting Beater

Gemma Rees - Chudley Cannons reserve Seeker

Gillian - Chudley Cannons art director

Harper - Auror trainee

Healer MacAlister - Chudley Cannons team healer

Helena Strauss - A witch Harry takes home ...

Isla Preston - Caerphilly Catapults starting Seeker

Janet Lindhurst - Chudley Cannons starting Keeper

Jenny Barnes - Hermione's cousin, twin to Albert

Jerome Wither - Wimbourne Wasps starting Seeker

Joanne Barrowmaker - Owen’s wife

Jocelyn - See Maryann

Julian Barnwistle - Appleby Arrows starting Seeker

Kammy - Lydia's house-elf

Kate Barrowmaker - Owen's daughter, twin to Liza

Kieran Sheppard - Ballycastle Bats starting Seeker

Laetitia Weston - Fashion model, friend of Harry

Lara - Chudley Cannons staff assistant

Lisa Black - Fourth cousin to Harry, by way of a disinherited Black family squib

Liza Barrowmaker - Owen's daughter, twin to Kate

Louisa Gesso - Portrait artist

Lucinda Bellamy - Ryan’s mother (née Spoonwocket)

Lyle - Chudley Cannons reserve Beater

Lydia Travers - Pure-blood princess, great-niece to Death Eater Ursinus Travers

Lythian - Centaur, former boyfriend to Luna

Magnus Travers - Lydia's grandfather, Lord of the Wizengamot, brother to Death Eater Ursinus Travers

Margaret Black - Restored member of Black family

Maryann - See Jocelyn

Marjorie Tuttle - Chudley Cannons head coach

Marvin Black - Restored member of Black family, son of Elliott

Merrick Bode - Director of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement

Murdoch - Auror trainer

Nitta - House-elf serving the Malfoys

Octavia Wind - Hermione’s mentor at the Ministry

Oscar Abbott - Member of the Wizengamot (Light)

Owen Barrowmaker - Chudley Cannons reserve Seeker

Penelope* - Muggle who Harry spends two nights with

Phil Routledge - Puddlemere United starting Seeker

Ragnok - Director of Gringotts London

Rebecca - Helena’s friend, dates George Weasley

Redblade - Gringotts goblin

Reginald Baxter - Member of the Wizengamot (Dark)

Renée Vickers - Chudley Cannons starting Chaser

Romulus Wynter - Lord of the Wizengamot (neutral)

Ryan Bellamy - Chudley Cannons starting Chaser

Sandra - Chudley Cannons legal staff

Sarah Trent - Pride of Portree starting Seeker

Selden Puttick - Banchory Bangers starting Seeker

Silas Yawton - Chair of the Pratt's membership committee

Simon Longclaw - Harry's tutor, werewolf

Sophie Tavernier - French fashion model

Speartooth - Gringotts goblin

Spencer - Former Chudley Cannons starting Seeker

Stephen Finial - Interior decorator

Susanna Montfort - Chudley Cannons head of publicity

Tertius Squint - Optimancer

Thaddeus - Chudley Cannons publicity staff

Mrs Thwip - Harry's private secretary, employed by the Cannons

Titus Kilbourne - Chudley Cannons reserve Beater

Trapskin - Gringotts goblin

Trevor Underhill - Falmouth Falcons starting Seeker

Suresh Dhawan - Chudley Cannons starting Beater

Sylvester Chiffle - Montrose Magpies team manager

Vanessa Waite - Friend of Helena Strauss, threesome participant

Vera Chappell - A witch Harry takes home (AKA "The Sorceress witch")

Victor Squabble - Chudley Cannons team solicitor

Walter Bellamy* - Ryan’s father

Wendy Brewer - Holyhead Harpies reserve Chaser

Woodbridge - Auror trainer

Xanthus Fawley - Lord of the Wizengamot (neutral)

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay by Saphroneth reviews
Harry Potter is a dragon. He's been a dragon for several years, and frankly he's quite used to the idea - after all, in his experience nobody ever comments about it, so presumably it's just what happens sometimes. Magic, though, THAT is something entirely new. Comedy fic, leading on from the consequences of one... admittedly quite large... change. Cover art by amalgamzaku.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 91 - Words: 611,529 - Reviews: 2626 - Favs: 4,061 - Follows: 4,601 - Updated: 11/22 - Published: 3/10/2019 - Harry P.
The Bureaucratic Error by Iniga reviews
After his death, Remus finds himself 5 years in the past, having undone Voldemort's defeat and Teddy's birth. He's going to need his old friend Sirius to help him with this one. Trying again with chapter 92. I think the site is fixed and those of you who couldn't see it last week can see it now. 11-6-2020.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Family - Chapters: 93 - Words: 404,796 - Reviews: 1705 - Favs: 848 - Follows: 1,289 - Updated: 11/21 - Published: 9/1/2018 - [Remus L., N. Tonks] Sirius B.
Grow Young with Me by Taliesin19 reviews
He always sat there, just staring out the window. The nameless man with sad eyes. He bothered no one, and no one bothered him. Until now, that is. Abigail Waters knew her curiosity would one day be the death of her...but not today. Today it would give her life instead.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 29 - Words: 255,540 - Reviews: 1991 - Favs: 5,347 - Follows: 6,597 - Updated: 11/13 - Published: 3/14/2015 - Harry P., OC
Great Things by FitzDizzyspells8 reviews
After the death of his daughter, Mr. Ollivander has sworn off making wands. That was before an old reunion, a game of chance, and Albus Dumbledore. Winner of the DLP Q3 2020 Competition.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,982 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 6 - Published: 11/3 - Albus D., G. Ollivander, Florean Fortescue - Complete
Ghost of Privet Drive by AndrewWolfe reviews
"Fix it" said the Fates. "Fix what? With what tools and skills?" I asked. Being dead was only the first of the obstacles. And then I found myself in an understairs cupboard listening to a little boy quietly sobbing. Oh. Fix THAT. In which a sarcastic old git is dropped into the awful childhood of Harry Potter. SI-ish. Rated M for foul language and canon-level abuse.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 28 - Words: 265,957 - Reviews: 666 - Favs: 2,143 - Follows: 2,392 - Updated: 8/28 - Published: 11/19/2019 - Harry P., Petunia D., Vernon D., OC - Complete
Luna Lovegood and the Dark Lord's Diary by The madness in me reviews
Tom Riddle's plans fall through when Ginny Weasley loses his diary shortly after starting her first year and it is found by one Luna Lovegood. A series of bizarre conversations follow. Luna? - Yes Tom? - I've been giving this a lot of thought...and I believe you may be insane. (Not crack. Plot takes a while to appear but it's there) See last chapter for fan art and translations.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 101 - Words: 72,373 - Reviews: 4121 - Favs: 4,028 - Follows: 3,555 - Updated: 5/27 - Published: 3/16/2017 - Luna L., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Animagus at War by White Squirrel reviews
Sequel to The Accidental Animagus. Voldemort's back, and this time, he's not alone. Harry and his family are caught in the middle as the wizarding war goes international. Years 5-7.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 28 - Words: 176,445 - Reviews: 1004 - Favs: 2,654 - Follows: 3,998 - Updated: 5/9 - Published: 8/6/2016 - Harry P., Hermione G., Luna L., Neville L.
A Familiar's Work is Never Done by Triscribe reviews
Time travel fix-it fics are all over this dang site, but have you ever read one where the character to go back is a bird? No? Me neither, so I decided I had to write one. Alternate title: Hedwig Is Very Fed Up With All This Nonsense
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,073 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 227 - Follows: 177 - Published: 5/4 - Harry P., Hedwig - Complete
Dobby's Deceit by La Morraine reviews
What if Dobby bound himself to Harry without Harry knowing about it? How would that influence the story? [Harry/Hermione]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 378,980 - Reviews: 1837 - Favs: 4,365 - Follows: 6,029 - Updated: 4/16 - Published: 1/19/2019 - Harry P., Hermione G., Dobby
An American's Guide to Harry Potter Fanfiction by Evil Mockingbird reviews
Or, How to Convince People You Aren't a Yank: a Brief Guide to Being British
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,960 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 9 - Published: 1/25 - Complete
Vernon's Lament by abhayakara reviews
What if there was a reason that the Dursleys were so awful? Not an excuse, just a human story? And what if something happened, say on Dudley's sixth birthday, that broke the pattern and rearranged the relationships we're familiar with in the Dursley's home? This fic tries to humanize every character: not to make them all good, but to make them make more sense.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 18 - Words: 57,823 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 122 - Updated: 12/23/2019 - Published: 5/29/2019 - Harry P., Petunia D., Vernon D., Arabella F.
Benefits of old laws by ulktante reviews
Parts of souls do not go on alone. When Voldemort returns to a body he is much more sane than before and realizes that he cannot go on as he started. Finding some old laws he sets out to reach his goals in another way. Harry will find his world turned upside down once more and we will see how people react when the evil is not acting how they think it should.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 109 - Words: 878,803 - Reviews: 6338 - Favs: 6,063 - Follows: 6,208 - Updated: 10/3/2019 - Published: 10/3/2015 - Harry P., Severus S., Voldemort - Complete
By Baker Street Station, I Sat Down and Wept by Deco reviews
Petunia Dursley has trouble: she's lost her family, she's going crazy, she can do magic (but not always), her suitors are a mixed bag (operative word) & people keep trying to take her children away from her. They should be very afraid. (Not only a) Double Severitus. WARNING: Not what you expected.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 142 - Words: 555,365 - Reviews: 4181 - Favs: 2,171 - Follows: 2,469 - Updated: 3/31/2019 - Published: 1/1/2013 - Harry P., Severus S., Petunia D., Dudley D.
Harry Potter, Geek of Magic by jlluh reviews
Harry Potter is a geek, a nerd, a total dork whose favorite hobby is "transfiguring stuff." He doesn't understand what rules are, has no social skills, is barely sentient, and is very smart.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 23 - Words: 73,007 - Reviews: 789 - Favs: 2,803 - Follows: 3,838 - Updated: 3/27/2019 - Published: 10/27/2017 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G., Luna L.
A Step to the Right by CatsAreCool reviews
When Harry saves Hermione's life they end up in a different world and in the middle of another magical war - but at least they have each other.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 66,740 - Reviews: 1896 - Favs: 4,204 - Follows: 4,331 - Updated: 3/24/2019 - Published: 6/17/2018 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Annals of Arithmancy by White Squirrel reviews
Part 3 of The Arithmancer Series. Hermione won the war, but her career as the world's greatest arithmancer is just beginning. Now, she has places to go, spells to invent, and a family to start. Oh, and a whole lot of dementors to kill.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 24 - Words: 154,813 - Reviews: 1077 - Favs: 1,475 - Follows: 1,506 - Updated: 3/23/2019 - Published: 7/14/2018 - Hermione G., George W. - Complete
Arya Lily Potter by Kirstenlh23 reviews
Several seemingly small changes in a familiar story spark large differences down the line. James and Lily Potter welcome their new daughter to the world on July 31st, instead of a son. Amelia Bones corrects an old mistake, and an innocent man is released from prison after six years.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 60 - Words: 213,723 - Reviews: 772 - Favs: 1,435 - Follows: 1,730 - Updated: 3/6/2019 - Published: 1/30/2015 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G., Sirius B.
Dear Hermione by MsBinns reviews
Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Ron writes to Hermione while they're apart in the months prior to and during her final year at Hogwarts. Serves as an accompaniment to my story "Reunited".
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 32,016 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 3/3/2019 - Published: 2/16/2016 - Ron W., Hermione G.
Reunited by MsBinns reviews
A short series of vignettes about all the times Ron and Hermione reunite following Deathly Hallows and the events of my story Australia. See my story "Dear Hermione" to read letters from Ron that accompany the story.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 51,956 - Reviews: 198 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 260 - Updated: 3/3/2019 - Published: 3/14/2015 - Ron W., Hermione G.
Backward With Purpose Part II: The Book of Albus by deadwoodpecker reviews
This is the companion novel to Backward With Purpose. I'd read that one first. This story is complete; the sequel has begun.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 55 - Words: 105,530 - Reviews: 1503 - Favs: 1,720 - Follows: 700 - Updated: 9/28/2018 - Published: 6/20/2008 - Albus S. P. - Complete
The many Deaths of Harry Potter by ShayneT reviews
In a world with a pragmatic, intelligent Voldemort, Harry discovers that he has the power to live, die and repeat until he gets it right.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 78 - Words: 242,571 - Reviews: 3857 - Favs: 6,465 - Follows: 4,224 - Updated: 6/14/2017 - Published: 3/1/2017 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Long Live The Queen by offsides reviews
With Harry Potter's hearing for Underage Use of Magic looming, and Sirius Black hunted for a crime he didn't commit and was never tried for, Harry reaches out to Her Majesty the Queen for help, with unexpected results. No ships. AU starting Ch 6-9 OotP, No HBP, No DH, No Horcruxes. COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 44 - Words: 174,577 - Reviews: 4497 - Favs: 10,366 - Follows: 8,181 - Updated: 10/27/2016 - Published: 9/11/2015 - Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
I Know Not, and I Cannot Know--Yet I Live and I Love by billowsandsmoke reviews
Severus Snape has his emotions in check. He knows that he experiences anger and self-loathing and a bitter yearning, and that he rarely deviates from that spectrum… Until the first-year Luna Lovegood arrives to his class wearing a wreath of baby's breath. Over the next six years, an odd friendship grows between the two, and Snape is not sure how he feels about any of it.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 32,487 - Reviews: 338 - Favs: 1,387 - Follows: 343 - Published: 4/30/2016 - Harry P., Severus S., Luna L. - Complete
Seventh Horcrux by Emerald Ashes reviews
The presence of a foreign soul may have unexpected side effects on a growing child. I am Lord Volde...Harry Potter. I'm Harry Potter. In which Harry is insane, Hermione is a Dark Lady-in-training, Ginny is a minion, and Ron is confused.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 21 - Words: 104,212 - Reviews: 1745 - Favs: 9,219 - Follows: 4,296 - Updated: 2/3/2015 - Published: 9/7/2014 - Harry P. - Complete
Australia by MsBinns reviews
Ron grieves the loss of his brother and tries to figure out life after the war while trying to navigate his new relationship with Hermione. Cover art is by the talented anxiouspineapples and is titled "At Long Last".
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 45 - Words: 340,509 - Reviews: 2530 - Favs: 1,926 - Follows: 1,415 - Updated: 8/30/2014 - Published: 11/18/2011 - Ron W., Hermione G. - Complete
Harry Crow by RobSt reviews
What will happen when a goblin-raised Harry arrives at Hogwarts. A Harry who has received training, already knows the prophecy and has no scar. With the backing of the goblin nation and Hogwarts herself. Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 106 - Words: 737,006 - Reviews: 28676 - Favs: 26,714 - Follows: 16,912 - Updated: 6/8/2014 - Published: 6/5/2012 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] - Complete
Perception is Everything by Kendra James reviews
When Severus Snape is left in charge of Hogwarts over the christmas break, he is less than pleased to discover Harry will be one of his charges. Events force him to face that Mr Potter may not be quite what he has assumed all these years. Year 6
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 42 - Words: 165,658 - Reviews: 4931 - Favs: 9,739 - Follows: 5,991 - Updated: 5/31/2014 - Published: 4/26/2010 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Delenda Est by Lord Silvere reviews
Harry is a prisoner, and Bellatrix has fallen from grace. The accidental activation of Bella's treasured heirloom results in another chance for Harry. It also gives him the opportunity to make the acquaintance of the young and enigmatic Bellatrix Black as they change the course of history.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 46 - Words: 392,449 - Reviews: 7884 - Favs: 15,930 - Follows: 9,707 - Updated: 9/21/2013 - Published: 11/14/2009 - Harry P., Bellatrix L. - Complete
What's In A Name? by Newcomb reviews
Tom Riddle, age 16, visits the Chamber of Secrets one night to consult the basilisk on a most important matter: his brand-new, Very Scary new name.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,385 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 137 - Follows: 37 - Published: 5/19/2013 - Tom R. Jr., Basilisk - Complete
The Best Revenge by Arsinoe de Blassenville reviews
AU. Yes, the old Snape retrieves Harry from the Dursleys formula. I just had to write one. Everything changes, because the best revenge is living well. T for Mentor Snape's occasional naughty language. Supportive Minerva. Over three million hits!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 47 - Words: 213,669 - Reviews: 6924 - Favs: 10,755 - Follows: 5,364 - Updated: 9/10/2011 - Published: 3/9/2009 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Taking Control by fake a smile reviews
It's the summer before Harry's 6th year, and Harry is wracked with grief. But what happens when Harry makes a vow to himself to take control of his life? Harry's life takes a sharp turn when he gets an unexpected visitor one night. HPGW Independent!Harry
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 28 - Words: 523,307 - Reviews: 3119 - Favs: 7,859 - Follows: 4,019 - Updated: 11/15/2008 - Published: 5/23/2006 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Bond by Anna Fugazzi reviews
Yet another one of those Harry And Draco Are Forced To Be Together By Something Beyond Their Control And Then Stuff Happens Leading To Twoo Wuv stories. Because every HD writer has to write at least one. [Finished]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 204,036 - Reviews: 3678 - Favs: 9,487 - Follows: 2,220 - Updated: 3/30/2006 - Published: 7/20/2005 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
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Loose Cannon reviews
He survived the war—now it's time to grow up. Fourteen months after the Battle of Hogwarts, an overheard, off-the-cuff comment turns Harry's life upside-down. Goodbye Auror training, hello Chudley Cannons! And witches ... lots of witches (but no harem). Warning: Many tropes were harmed in the writing of this fic, and Cursed Child never happened. OCs galore. NO MORTAL PERIL.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 95 - Words: 787,999 - Reviews: 825 - Favs: 892 - Follows: 1,191 - Updated: 11/18 - Published: 12/14/2019 - Harry P., Hermione G., OC, Kreacher
Loose Cannon: Omake Files reviews
This is where I'll post the occasional Omake from my main fic, Loose Cannon. Note that I probably removed it from Loose Cannon because it was in bad taste, so consider yourself warned. NO MORTAL PERIL.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 610 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 27 - Published: 4/16