Anastatius Cypress
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Joined 09-11-06, id: 1132357, Profile Updated: 01-08-08
Author has written 3 stories for Clock Tower, and Kingdom Hearts.

Ah... I used to be on this site under another pen name ages ago in my younger years...

Alas, I left... taking my work with me. Which wasn't the best, but still enjoyed by a select few individuals for it's base concepts. And now, I have gloriously returned! Well... perhaps not exactly "gloriously"... at least semi-triumphantly though. Ah, I make myself laugh. Yet back to the point (if I was actually making one previously.) The years I spent away from this site gave me a good amount of time to improve upon my writing skills, and to rewrite and revise my flawed previous works. Even presently, they're far from perfect, but at least I won't cringe at the thought of them being seen in public anymore! I've also written a good amount of new material to go along with it, and have many more strange, fragmented ideas floating around in my head.

My works can be best described as absurd. Yes... absurd. I deal in comedy you see, being a random person with a sense of humor that ranges from satirical to just plain bizarre. My favorite thing to do to a character in a fanfiction, or any other sort of comedy writing, is to find their strangest or most notable quirk and cause it to envelop their entire personality. Also, whilst playing video games, I usually have at least one good friend around with me at the time, and we tend to poke fun at characters, and eventually make up strange stories about them and/or imagine them doing odd things that in reality, they would probably never do. In short, if you take my work seriously, your head will hurt. Don't try and tell me that a character is OOC, believe me... I already realize this more than you will ever know. Who knows... someday I may decide to take up the task of writing a serious fanfiction. And at that time, you may do whatever you want to me. -; Regardless of what I'm writing however, constructive criticism is always appreciated!

It should be noted that I am a horrible procrastinator... and may go for a long period of time without updating. I'm going to work on this, so if you take the time to read my work, bear with me.

My favorite pastimes include: drawing, writing, RPing, watching anime, reading manga, reading books, playing videogames, watching theatre/musicals, listening to music (mostly visual kei), playing DDR, drinking tea, running around with my less than sane friends.

Other locations: I'm on Elftown (Anastatius Cypress), although it should probably be noted that I barely ever log on nowadays, and Gaia (Aconitum Amusement.) Feel free to message me at one of these locations or email me if you want to make contact with me.

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Those Lacking Spines by Organization VI reviews
Immune to a suspicious parasite by merit of their manly looks, Xaldin, Vexen and Lexaeus set out on a journey to save the rest of Organization XIII from the biggest nightmare of all: stupid fanfiction.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 13 - Words: 111,474 - Reviews: 1866 - Favs: 2,213 - Follows: 613 - Updated: 9/18/2008 - Published: 4/20/2006 - Xaldin, Vexen - Complete
Organization Goes to the Airport by Organization III reviews
Xemnas has decided that if there is one thing that the Organization is bad at, it's blending in. So, a trip to a people filled airport is perfect! Of course, plane hijacking is also on the mind.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 18,205 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 10/10/2007 - Published: 12/9/2006 - Zexion, Axel - Complete
Parasite Eve: The Parody by bluemoo reviews
Obviously, a parody of Parasite Eve. Chapter 3: Offended Moogles, repetitive battles, and pink dresses abound. No mad scientists here!
Parasite Eve - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,696 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 3/13/2007 - Published: 2/8/2007
Cross Eyed Vixens by M. L. Helena reviews
Can you really go cross eyed if you stare at your nose to long? [ .oneshot. ]
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 450 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Published: 2/11/2007 - Vexen, Demyx - Complete
Scissor Twins Meet by JollyDoll reviews
Ralph and Jemima are on a quest to retrieve Alyssa's heart so the Ritual of Engagement can be performed. However there is one problem: they keep ending up in the wrong place.
Clock Tower - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,972 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/8/2005
Death by Volt Kreuger by Scott Lysander reviews
Two years after the events of the Bouncer, the classic villains return...to participate in mundane activities. Volt sees their wrongdoings and comes to the rescue! Rated PG -13 for mild language, sexual reference, and violence. R&R PLZ LOL K THX!
Bouncer - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,099 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Published: 8/18/2004
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My Candy Filled Adventure: A Sora Story reviews
A rewrite of one of my older fanfictions. Sora is hit in the head with a coconut, and sets of on a lovely little adventure with an impaired mind and a gender confused heart. Poking fun at Sora and Disney characters seldom gets tiring...
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,325 - Reviews: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/21/2007 - Sora
Riku and the Haunted House reviews
An absurd oneshot. Riku, while in a haunted house, is confronted by a mysterious disembodied voice with an odd way of going about things. Cactus juice and a limo crash are involved.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,447 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/9/2007 - Riku - Complete
The Boarders reviews
Alyssa returns from a very unfruitful subordinate extermination mission to find that Dennis has hired some workers to rebuild the demolished boarding house, yet she soon realizes that the help may be a bit more trouble than they are worth...
Clock Tower - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,261 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/21/2007