valbino
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Poll: So, tell me: Do you and I like the same ships? Yes, Itachi is my favorite character, how did you know Vote Now!
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Joined 12-19-06, id: 1184625, Profile Updated: 02-27-14
Author has written 19 stories for Star Wars, Naruto, Abarat series, Batman Begins/Dark Knight, and Mass Effect.

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Val/F/20

Creative Writing major, Classical Culture and Ancient Greek minors @ BSU

Likes coffee, music, gaming, and laughing at own jokes

has a cool boyfriend with a cool website

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In The Blood by justplainrii reviews
Almost 30 years after the end of the war, Sasuke finds a boy that looks exactly like his brother. He doesn't handle it well. Especially when other lookalikes begin to surface, and all signs point to an old foe being responsible. A mystery.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Drama - Chapters: 158 - Words: 714,597 - Reviews: 880 - Favs: 247 - Follows: 221 - Updated: 4/16 - Published: 8/4/2010 - Sasuke U., Naruto U., Ino Y., Karin
Neutron Star Collision by BEN-Beyond the Elusive Nomads reviews
Shepard never really recovered after the attack on Akuze. She leaves the Alliance for good, hoping to put her past behind her, but Shepard has never been good at coping. After five years she books the first flight off of Earth and finds herself in a battle of the wills with an ex-C-Sec officer mourning the loss of his best friend. Shakarian AU.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 19,544 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 75 - Updated: 3/16 - Published: 11/8/2013 - Shepard (F), Garrus V.
The Traitor and the NineTails by Loudest Voice reviews
Itachi finds alternate means to stop the Uchiha uprising. Five years later, he's assigned his first genin team.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 26 - Words: 199,147 - Reviews: 633 - Favs: 724 - Follows: 847 - Updated: 10/27/2013 - Published: 2/9/2012 - Itachi U.
The Chaos Theory by Bullwinkle's Lady reviews
"If you die, I die," he mentioned. "Tell me when you're ready." Time travel story. SasuHina.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 46 - Words: 143,534 - Reviews: 1368 - Favs: 717 - Follows: 590 - Updated: 8/9/2013 - Published: 1/1/2010 - Sasuke U., Hinata H. - Complete
Crack Whims by firefly reviews
Odd pairings. Whimsical humour. Somewhat disturbing scenarios. It's what you'll find here in this collection of crack drabbles.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 28,296 - Reviews: 1236 - Favs: 1,058 - Follows: 579 - Updated: 7/6/2013 - Published: 1/1/2008
Mass Effect: Interregnum by The Naked Pen reviews
The Battle of the Citadel has been won. Saren Arterius is dead. Commander Shepard is dead. Garrus Vakarian isn't. Alone on Omega among slavers, murderers, mercenaries, insane warlords and the worst of the galaxy's criminals, he does the only thing he can: declares war. The Archangel legend is born, but angels can fall. Nothing's ever easy...
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Crime - Chapters: 55 - Words: 303,425 - Reviews: 354 - Favs: 412 - Follows: 273 - Updated: 3/23/2013 - Published: 2/25/2010 - Complete
Jesus in the Hunger Games by burtwilson reviews
A gripping story about Jesus' time in the arena.
Crossover - Bible & Hunger Games - Rated: K - English - Suspense/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 373 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 8 - Published: 2/26/2013 - Jesus - Complete
Husk by crocodile swing reviews
Mikoto and Fugaku get married
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,838 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/30/2013 - Mikoto U., Fugaku U.
Fifty Days by ohgoditsbriony reviews
"In fifty days, Uchiha Sasuke will be executed." For fifty days, she will visit him. For fifty days, he will fall steadily in love. —Sasuke/Hinata
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 148,998 - Reviews: 1149 - Favs: 850 - Follows: 843 - Updated: 12/3/2012 - Published: 4/23/2010 - Sasuke U., Hinata H.
Age of Marvels by justplainrii reviews
Hashirama loses his final battle with Madara, and Konoha is destroyed. But eighty years later, Hashirama is revived, and is recruited by Hatake "Fury" Kakashi, the leader of a resistance movement against the Uchihas. Rechristened "Hokage," Hashirama joins Fury in recruiting other heroes for one final stand against Madara, to avenge his village, and save the world. Avengers AU
Crossover - Avengers & Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 12,198 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 11/9/2012 - Published: 9/14/2012 - Captain America/Steve R., Hashirama S.
Serenato by moonlight gal reviews
"I believe in dreams," she answers with a smile. This is when Sasuke falls in love.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 17 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 14 - Published: 7/9/2012 - Sasuke U., Hinata H. - Complete
A Test of Insanity by Starchii reviews
AU DeiXIno ItaXSaku TenXHidan Complete Sakura, Tenten, and Ino were just walking back from a mission when suddenly two Akatsuki members appear and capture them. What is their motive and why did they kidnap all three of them?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 49,518 - Reviews: 250 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 6/21/2012 - Published: 3/9/2007 - Ino Y., Deidara - Complete
Ball and Chain by firefly reviews
The first two months of marriage are always the hardest, especially when your wife seems dead set on giving you a nervous breakdown and possibly smothering you in your sleep. Ino. Sasuke. Crackfic.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,972 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 191 - Follows: 29 - Published: 6/21/2012 - Ino Y., Sasuke U. - Complete
Warmth for Winter by opulent reviews
Oneshot. Naoto, for the most part, didn't like winter. NaotoxKanji.
Persona Series - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,411 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 26 - Published: 4/19/2012 - Kanji T., Naoto S. - Complete
Via Media by DeGlace reviews
"I bet you're a vegetarian," said Temari, and she plucked at a nearby plant. "Here's a leaf for you, try not to choke." It all went downhill from there... One road. Two bunkhouses. Three weeks of border patrol. Neji x Temari.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 24,538 - Reviews: 252 - Favs: 257 - Follows: 125 - Updated: 3/26/2012 - Published: 3/27/2008 - Neji H., Temari - Complete
Whilst Time Turns by Aixyutin - Zwei Shonagon reviews
It was not ironic that Nara Shikamaru, Uchiha Sasuke, and Hyuuga Hinata alone had survive. What was ironic was that Naruto seemed intent on correcting the wrongs even if it meant throwing them back into the past for the bitter task of saving the world. AU
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 15,260 - Reviews: 218 - Favs: 213 - Follows: 243 - Updated: 2/24/2012 - Published: 7/2/2010 - Hinata H., Sasuke U.
Discernment by LuteLyre reviews
Kisame doesn't need to understand Itachi. A foray into Kisa/Ita.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,731 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 11 - Published: 12/31/2011 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
In The Eyes by RC Mason reviews
Sasuke did nothing as Hinata climbed into his bed, settling herself in a comfy position next to him. But why should he? They've been living together since his family's massacre, since the Hyuuga have taken him in. SasuHina.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,339 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 12/25/2011 - Published: 4/16/2011 - Hinata H., Sasuke U.
The Babysitter by Daydreamer79 reviews
Itachi Uchiha doesn't need or want a babysitter. His parents don't agree and employ Kisame Hoshigaki to do the job. This means war.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,576 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 146 - Follows: 11 - Published: 11/27/2011 - Itachi U., Kisame H. - Complete
Having Edge by Bullwinkle's Lady reviews
He was seated at the edge of the bed, pulling on a sock, when she decided to kiss him. SasuHina, arranged marriage. Prize-fic for fhclause for placing in The Distance contest.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,780 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 318 - Follows: 42 - Published: 8/29/2011 - Sasuke U., Hinata H. - Complete
Omega Noire by The Naked Pen reviews
A dead body on Omega isn't unusual. For Garrus Vakarian, it's routine. As he investigates, he's drawn ever deeper into the seedy underbelly of Omega, and the case won't let go. First person; basically, detective noir meets Mass Effect.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Crime/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 13,033 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 10 - Published: 7/22/2011 - Complete
Act 2: Lowtown: Party Banter by Thessilian reviews
It's always embarrassing when your friends find out who you're crushing on. Varric and Isabela tease Anders in this party banter that was cut from Act 2.* *Not really.
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,210 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 6 - Published: 4/10/2011 - Anders, Hawke (M) - Complete
Happier by We Stole Vodka From The Optic reviews
"For what it's worth... I'm glad it's you. It was nice... to be happy for a while."
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,136 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/17/2011 - Anders, Hawke (F) - Complete
Hide the Stars by Nocturnal Smile reviews
Kisame doesn't deal very well with the fact that Itachi has grown up. Well, that's what anyone with a normal set of morals would say.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,017 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 11 - Published: 2/15/2011 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
The Taming of the Land of Big Comfy Beds by ckret2 reviews
If you were to ask Hashirama how he felt, he'd say he was happy. If you were to ask Madara, he'd say his feet were cold and Hashirama's head was cutting off circulation to his arm. But on the other hand, it was a nice bed. HashiMada. Pure fluff. Oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,677 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 10 - Published: 2/4/2011 - Madara U., Hashirama S. - Complete
Teeth by ckret2 reviews
Itachi's tongue is bleeding. Kisame's more sheepish about this than he'd like to admit. KisaIta. Fluff. Oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 726 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/25/2011 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
Caught You on the Flip Side by firefly reviews
I knew you once, a long time ago. You were born in a nebula, and I was born in a star, and the spark of our union was enough to ignite a thousand Big Bangs. And though I don't remember you, I've never stopped searching. Deidara/Ino. AU.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Spiritual/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 43,430 - Reviews: 201 - Favs: 242 - Follows: 187 - Updated: 1/24/2011 - Published: 6/11/2010 - Ino Y., Deidara
Butchery & Happiness by JACinthebox reviews
When 23 year old Sadako is sent on the wrong mission by mistake, she is hunted down by the Akatsuki. But when your shortest, slowest, and weakest of Jounin, what are you to do? Kisame x OC I'm BACK!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 28 - Words: 47,821 - Reviews: 550 - Favs: 282 - Follows: 240 - Updated: 1/22/2011 - Published: 3/5/2007 - Kisame H., Itachi U.
My Itachi He is SAD by Samurai101 reviews
Kisame notices some interesting changes in his partner every winter-changes Kisame's not sure he can deal with. He decides to shed some light on the situation and see what happens. ::slightly-cracky::
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,257 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/19/2011 - Kisame H., Itachi U.
Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained by ghost.713 reviews
Guardian angels have never been perfect creatures, but a one-time hitman might be stretching things.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 80,800 - Reviews: 341 - Favs: 320 - Follows: 297 - Updated: 12/14/2010 - Published: 6/9/2010 - Kolyat K., Oriana L.
Fighting the Future by MoonVeil reviews
A strange scroll lands Sakura in the past and face to face with someone she'd happily hated for years. Unprepared for the world she’s now in, Sakura will battle enemies and her own heart as she tries to find a way home. OrochimaruSakura
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 10,763 - Reviews: 611 - Favs: 286 - Follows: 400 - Updated: 12/6/2010 - Published: 11/17/2006 - Sakura H., Orochimaru
The Thin Line Between by Legendary Legacy reviews
Mid-timeskip, Sakura misses Sasuke. So much that she takes it upon herself to go find him. Alone. Without telling anyone. What, dangerous? Don't be silly. ItaXSaku. Squee. Mockfic, OoC, 4th wall breaking. Not one of my better works, but here you go.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Parody/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,489 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 4 - Published: 12/2/2010 - Sakura H., Itachi U. - Complete
Summer Lightning by The Penumbra reviews
Sasuke flicked a glance to his left, where the girl who had hijacked his ride was sitting demurely, hands folded neatly in her lap, securely strapped into the back seat of the taxi without a trace of worry on her face.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,559 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 11/13/2010 - Published: 8/17/2010 - Sasuke U., Hinata H.
Black and White by Kapootya reviews
It was supposed to be three seconds of eternal damnation...but she was four seconds ahead of him.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 11 - Words: 46,735 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 185 - Follows: 199 - Updated: 10/3/2010 - Published: 3/29/2009 - Sakura H., Itachi U.
Mass Effect: Grunt Sticks It In by Gregg Landsman reviews
Upon deciding that hanging herself out as the cyborg carrot on a stick for the Asari Sex Vampire was not a good idea, Commander Jane Shepard decides to use her varied team of specialists to set an actual trap. In theory.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,924 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 93 - Published: 9/27/2010
Ascendant by Samurai101 reviews
Itachi's just died...and woken up thirteen again. The only problem is his thirteen year-old self doesn't like the idea of sharing his mind and body with his clan's killer. How hard would you fight to save your family from yourself? ::AU::COMPLETE::
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Supernatural - Chapters: 35 - Words: 115,202 - Reviews: 1142 - Favs: 1,377 - Follows: 598 - Updated: 9/6/2010 - Published: 8/2/2009 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Garrus Gets a Prostate Exam by Xysnei reviews
Exactly what it says on the tin. This crackficlet was written for a prompt made by the Garrus thread over at the BioWare Social Network.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,855 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/8/2010 - Mordin S., Garrus V. - Complete
Improved Relations by noobcake reviews
The Citadel Council tries to tie Garrus and femShep up in an open-ended project to "improve relations" between turians and humans. They didn't expect the two to cut right to the chase. The turian Councilor is most put out. Crack fic, contains smut.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,969 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 210 - Follows: 17 - Published: 7/30/2010 - Garrus V., Shepard (F) - Complete
Okaeri by The Penumbra reviews
An excessively long-winded fic on how SasuHina came to be. He's back in Konoha, she's still obsessed with Naruto. Enough said. Prequel of sorts to 'Snapshots: Black and White'. Completed.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 23,364 - Reviews: 174 - Favs: 243 - Follows: 89 - Updated: 7/26/2010 - Published: 10/10/2008 - Hinata H., Sasuke U. - Complete
Holiday by popehippo reviews
Holidays can be rough. Even more so when it's a human holiday about romance, ritual and sex and you're... not human. Oneshot, FemShep/Garrus
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,684 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 15 - Published: 6/26/2010 - Shepard (F), Garrus V. - Complete
Some Words on Memory by coincident reviews
You can't love anything more than something you miss. Itachi/Hinata/Shisui, in various ways. One-shot.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,114 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 121 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/14/2010 - Hinata H., Shisui U. - Complete
Lord Vader's Limpet by frodogenic reviews
Several years post ROTJ, Lord Vader finds himself with a new role to fill-Grandpa. Extremely AU. If you've ever wanted to see Vader vs. Toddler, this is your story. : Humorous longshot. Cover courtesy of LV Writers image library.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,110 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 488 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 6/11/2010 - Published: 12/18/2008 - Darth Vader, Ben S. - Complete
Acceptable Loss by skybound2 reviews
In war - soldiers die. But when its someone you love...well, that's an entirely different story altogether. Originally written to fill a prompt for the Mass Effect kinkmeme. WARNING: Character deaths.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 26,662 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 5/28/2010 - Published: 5/20/2010 - Garrus V., Shepard (F) - Complete
The Worst Hangover Ever by Xysnei reviews
After a night of heavy drinking, Shepard wakes up to find her squad sleeping in her room. Naked. What happened? Thane knows. Crackfic, done on request. Reviews are very much appreciated.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,556 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/20/2010 - Shepard (F) - Complete
The Hundred Year Distance by fondleaf reviews
She is fast as lightning and burning just a bright, pushing him across the hundred year distance they have crossed since meeting and beyond. Femshep/Garrus, written for the masskink meme on LiveJournal.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,625 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 398 - Follows: 35 - Published: 5/15/2010 - Garrus V., Shepard (F) - Complete
just try not to worry by irnan reviews
This is the last day of Leia Organa's life. From a certain point of view.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,781 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 7 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Leia O., Luke S. - Complete
Vespertine by Cynchick reviews
Two enemies strike a bargain to save what they both hold dear. He will reveal a truth that shakes her beliefs, drawing her into a web of lies and betrayal. She will offer the redemption for which he never hoped and show him how to be human again. ItaSaku.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 117,376 - Reviews: 2079 - Favs: 2,616 - Follows: 960 - Updated: 2/22/2010 - Published: 3/25/2009 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
The Talk by TenshiXXX reviews
Sasuke, aged 10, asks the question every parent- and older brother, in this case- dreads to hear: what is sex? Try not to scar him too much, Itachi. Background KisaIta.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,408 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 212 - Follows: 23 - Published: 2/19/2010 - Sasuke U. - Complete
A Trail a Mile Wide by Heuksal reviews
Shepard didn't get much of a chance to celebrate after ruining Sovereign's day, and the SR2's crew could really use a break after the end of ME2. Minor postgame spoilers, Femshep and Garrus, mostly dialog, gratuitous nerdy in-jokes.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,685 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 414 - Follows: 40 - Published: 2/12/2010 - Shepard (F), Garrus V. - Complete
Akatsuki Employee Handbook by Lady Khali reviews
A guide to all things Akatsuki, including our internal rules and regulations. Written by Akatsuki members, for Akatsuki members, and subject to approval by senior management: Pain and Madara. All edits are final. Dispute at your own risk.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 19 - Words: 26,755 - Reviews: 416 - Favs: 757 - Follows: 194 - Updated: 12/21/2009 - Published: 6/17/2008 - Pain/Pein, Madara U. - Complete
The Socially Unacceptable Courtship by opalish reviews
Of Hyuuga Hinata. "I am so not helping them with the hand-holding," Hanabi sighed. "Seriously." SasuHina cracktastic oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,563 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 572 - Follows: 44 - Published: 11/19/2009 - Sasuke U., Hinata H. - Complete
Elysium by That.Other.Boleyn.Girl reviews
Sasuke Uchiha is drugged at a brothel and taken home by a certain charismatic blond. What results is a fascinated, fatal attraction which blurs the lines between dream and reality. NaruSasu, ItaSasu, SasuSasu, AU, One-Shot. Winner: 2009 Naruto Yaoi Fest.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,792 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 226 - Follows: 15 - Published: 8/12/2009 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Always by Trickster-jz reviews
Trilogy - Jaina sets out to save one person, and puts into motion a great deal more than just Zekk's redemption. YJK AU, JainaxZekk, Kyp, OCs. Now complete - thanks for reading!
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 118 - Words: 377,729 - Reviews: 174 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 7/21/2009 - Published: 7/12/2004 - Jaina S., Kyp D. - Complete
Moments in the Dark by Cynchick reviews
They never discuss it, never talk about why or when or how long it will continue. In a way, it's better like this. The not knowing. These secret moments in the dark. DeiSaku.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,686 - Reviews: 230 - Favs: 677 - Follows: 54 - Published: 7/20/2009 - Deidara, Sakura H. - Complete
Return of the Jedi , A Parody by Super Tinfoil Man Part 2 reviews
A parody of Return of the Jedi. What happens when Indiana Jones enters a time machine and replaces Buster Douglas in his fight with Mike Tyson? I have no idea, it's not in this story. Chapter 13- The final chap. is here.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 19,430 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 6/20/2009 - Published: 5/17/2006 - Complete
Ghosts by Rizzle reviews
Five years after the end of Voldemort and Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy is out of Azkaban and is a shell of his former self. Hermione Granger is doing her best, but she has demons of her own to deal with.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 25,443 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 288 - Follows: 30 - Published: 5/28/2009 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Shadowstep: Dead and Hating It by Mister Buch reviews
Selected entries from the diary of Booch Mishtar, Cyrodiil's most irritable adventurer. Chronicling his rise to mediocrity in the Dark Brotherhood and his transformation into Cyrodiil's most irritable vampire.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 10 - Words: 6,856 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 5/13/2009 - Published: 5/6/2009 - Complete
The End of Innocence by Meri Umeko reviews
HAITUS. Last part of the "Elva" trilogy. Sequel to Beginning of the End and Good Things Aren't Meant to Last. Picks off five months after BOTE. Rated M for content. PLEASE REVIEW.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 14,698 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/18/2008 - Published: 9/28/2008 - Konohamaru S., Sasuke U.
Chagrin by Estora reviews
I'M DANGEROUS, BELLA!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 396 - Reviews: 344 - Favs: 445 - Follows: 14 - Published: 9/30/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Beginning of the End by Meri Umeko reviews
Sequel to "Good Things Aren't Meant to Last." Four years have passed since Itachi died, and Elva decides it's time for a change. Rated T for language and content later on. PLEASE REVIEW!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 42,994 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 9/28/2008 - Published: 7/20/2008 - Konohamaru S., Sasuke U. - Complete
Rivals by paws-bells reviews
ItaSaku Ramen-verse Non Massacre AU. Rock Lee has a new rival, but Rock Lee will not give up, for the love of Sakura, Rock Lee will persevere! Crackfic, almost definitely!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,738 - Reviews: 136 - Favs: 307 - Follows: 45 - Published: 9/20/2008 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
Diem Ex Dei by Finnimbrun reviews
The road to hell, as they say, is paved with the very best intentions. Pein/Konan.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 19,031 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 9/14/2008 - Published: 9/5/2008 - Pain/Pein, Konan - Complete
Marche Funebre by That.Other.Boleyn.Girl reviews
I love you, Sasuke. But that won't stop me from killing you. Oneshot. ItaSasu
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,187 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/4/2008 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
A Date With Destiny by moonhaku reviews
When Hinata’s friends convince her to sign up for a blind date for her school’s King of Hearts ball, she wasn’t expecting a match-up with the most popular heartthrob around. When the school paper catches on, rumors will fly and hearts will break. SasuHina
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 15 - Words: 34,092 - Reviews: 359 - Favs: 178 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 8/12/2008 - Published: 3/9/2008 - Sasuke U., Hinata H. - Complete
Miriam's Well by Aelibia reviews
What started out as a supposedly chance encounter turned into a rather disquieting experience at a resort, and then everything got turned upside down. Hidan and Sakura.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,147 - Reviews: 169 - Favs: 319 - Follows: 121 - Updated: 7/27/2008 - Published: 3/8/2008 - Hidan, Sakura H. - Complete
Good Things Aren't Meant to Last by Meri Umeko reviews
COMPLETE. On a trip to Konohagakure, Itachi and Kisame encounter a talkative eight year old. Story starts two years later, after time skip. Please review! Rated T for language later on.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 16 - Words: 44,819 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 7/21/2008 - Published: 8/21/2007 - Itachi U., Kisame H. - Complete
FANIT by Crouching Tiger Hidden Shizuru reviews
The shortest anti SasuSaku story I've ever read. And wrote.
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 199 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 9 - Published: 7/19/2008 - Sasuke U., Sakura H. - Complete
Snapshots: Black and White by The Penumbra reviews
A series of snapshots throughout the years. Post-series - Sasuke, Hinata and their relationship. Part 5 - He would always love her. Always.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,251 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 143 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 6/26/2008 - Published: 3/6/2008 - Hinata H., Sasuke U. - Complete
Curtain call the final act by paws-bells reviews
ItaSaku Sequel to heart strings. They were never meant to be together. Fate was doing everything possible to tear them apart, but one thing binds them closer than never before. As long as hope never dies, life continues to blossom.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 19 - Words: 132,267 - Reviews: 1673 - Favs: 947 - Follows: 243 - Updated: 6/14/2008 - Published: 3/7/2008 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
Love by Mazuku reviews
Kisame wonders about his relationship with Itachi. Oneshot, KisaIta.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 769 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/13/2008 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
Things That Go Bump Into The Night by Awesome Anonymous reviews
Naruto hates things that go bump into the night. Especially when it's Hinata and Sasuke because they bump every night. //SasuHina\\-//Short and Simple\\
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,074 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 108 - Follows: 9 - Published: 6/11/2008 - Hinata H., Sasuke U. - Complete
I got captured by Deidara by Terrier Zii reviews
Some people might give up when they get captured by Sranked criminals...not me! For the betterment of humanity I plan to go down fighting! Never underestimate the power of idiocy and people like me in extraordinary situations...! DeidaraXOC
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 66,780 - Reviews: 624 - Favs: 249 - Follows: 196 - Updated: 6/9/2008 - Published: 5/17/2007 - Deidara
The New Generation: Students by MaverickBuff reviews
Years have passed since, and now, a new generation of shinobi will arise. Hiroshi, Sora and Ryouta set out on a new adventure as they take up their job as shinobi of the Leaf, and along the way, they will learn what it takes to become a true shinobi.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 35 - Words: 121,498 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 5/30/2008 - Published: 8/6/2007 - Complete
Quotidian by firefly reviews
When she accepted the graveyard shift of border patrol, Temari expected to find nothing but snakes and scorpions nestled between the dunes of dark sand. Amongst them, the last thing she expected to find was a missing nin out for a midnight prayer.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 9 - Words: 75,748 - Reviews: 852 - Favs: 923 - Follows: 315 - Updated: 5/22/2008 - Published: 1/8/2007 - Temari, Hidan - Complete
Highschool, babies, Homecoming, oh my! by xOProcrastinator reviews
What kind of chaos will ensue when Sakura becomes a new student at Konoha High? Read and find out! Comments are appreciated xD [SasuOC, NejiTen, GaaSaku, NaruHina, ShikaTem, KibaOC, ChouIno, Saiand his many fangirls xD] Can't help but love highschool.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 37,828 - Reviews: 105 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 5/3/2008 - Published: 2/19/2007
Masala Dosa by firefly reviews
Kakuzu is a slave to bargains, Hidan likes the spice of variety, and a dingy little restaurant provides a quaint intermediate between the two. Crackfic.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,145 - Reviews: 203 - Favs: 481 - Follows: 35 - Published: 4/27/2008 - Hidan, Kakuzu - Complete
Toying with your heart by DarkJutsu reviews
Sakura was a normal prep until her boyfriend Sasuke dumped her at the end of the year,now shes back with a vengence so he'd better watch out,ITASAKU!Yay!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 18,274 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 132 - Updated: 4/2/2008 - Published: 10/13/2006 - Sakura H., Itachi U.
Ne Plus Ultra by AkatsukiAddict reviews
When the Akatsuki leader recruits two new members, everyone in the organization's horrified to find that one of them's a Mary Sue and that the other's a total fashion disaster! Crackfic. Rated T for language.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,469 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 3/30/2008 - Published: 7/5/2007 - Hidan, Sasori
The Prettiest Princess by Ninjagrrl reviews
When Akatsuki have to go undercover at a beauty contest, they will stop at nothing to win. Crackfic.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,367 - Reviews: 236 - Favs: 665 - Follows: 46 - Published: 3/28/2008 - Deidara, Itachi U. - Complete
Watch by firefly reviews
A collection of frames and events, the ones that shaped his definitions of the human eye, and the ones that changed them. Itachi coming to terms with the end of it all. Introspective.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,259 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 190 - Follows: 13 - Published: 3/16/2008 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Nightmares by Mazuku reviews
A brief moment of terror leads to something Kisame never expected. ItaKisa, oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,475 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/13/2008 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
So Delicious by Farawen reviews
The Naruto gang visits a karaoke bar, and the only song available is Fergalicious. Under the influence of Red Bull, everyone makes up their own version. First up is Gaara. Special appearance by Akatsuki.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,638 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 3/4/2008 - Published: 6/21/2007 - Gaara, Sasuke U. - Complete
Bluescreen by Orm reviews
Deidara–centric Akatsuki fic set in a cyberpunk/sci–fi AU. Contains made–up slang, cyborgs and swearing. Mostly gen but hints of SasoDei if you're looking for them.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 12 - Words: 21,224 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 2/27/2008 - Published: 6/12/2007 - Deidara, Sasori
Dawn by allurement reviews
AU. Multiple pairings. “This is what remains of the great Uchiha, little brother. Take a good look, because tomorrow, it’ll be like they never existed.” This is for those who fall.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 12,364 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 2/26/2008 - Published: 12/20/2007
Another Day by Muria reviews
A glimpse into Todd's life between all the fights and before mutants made headlines...Contains a series of one-shots that shift style, intent, and secondary characters by chapter...
X-Men: Evolution - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,532 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 4 - Updated: 2/17/2008 - Published: 12/29/2007 - Toad/Todd T.
Shikamaru Plus Glasses Equals by therealesther reviews
Shikamaru could never have imagined the consequences of such an image change...dedicated to phishychan EPILOGUE NOW UP! THANK U AND GOODNIGHT!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 27,068 - Reviews: 488 - Favs: 628 - Follows: 274 - Updated: 2/15/2008 - Published: 2/15/2005 - Shikamaru N., Sakura H. - Complete
Thicker Than Water by ckret2 reviews
When a clan has a kekkei genkai, it goes to extremes to maintain it. Even if a child becomes a slave within his twin's body. Will Ukon end up just Sakon's tool? How can the bond between brothers rise above a clan's oppression? Sakon and Ukon's childhood.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 10 - Words: 30,141 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 2/4/2008 - Published: 3/14/2007 - Sakon, Zetsu
A Guide to Shinobi by Muria reviews
In the course of his information-collecting, Jiraiya's encountered a variety of characters around the world, keeping many as contacts. But now, an odd contact needs his help... to write a guide book on shinobi?
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,507 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/30/2008 - Published: 1/9/2008 - Jiraiya
Forty bucks and a foot rub by Sake Bottle Swing reviews
Envy X Pikachu X Shopping cart yields one cracktastic pairing. FMAPokemon crossover. Envy makes a bet with Greed, and soon needs help getting out of a tight situation.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,733 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/2/2008 - Envy, Greed - Complete
Felix Culpa by Ninjagrrl reviews
The felix culpa, or blessed fall. An attack from the Kyuubi leaves Itachi blind, his mind shattered and memories gone. Meanwhile, Kakashi is still recovering from the aftermath of a mission gone badly wrong.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 10 - Words: 30,828 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 1/1/2008 - Published: 8/24/2007 - Itachi U., Kakashi H. - Complete
Once Upon a Franchise: An ANTI Harry Potter xover by Farawen reviews
The gang for no reason ends up at Hogwarts and crazy crap happens. From the author that brought you So Delicious and Romeo and Juliet: Sasuke's Solution comes a completely new OOC crack fic, and the guyliner returns!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,790 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 12/18/2007 - Published: 7/9/2007 - Naruto U., Kabuto Y.
blood limit by paws-bells reviews
ItaSaku. Look at me, he whispered fiercely. I want you to look at me. Don't turn away.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,226 - Reviews: 161 - Favs: 392 - Follows: 47 - Published: 12/18/2007 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
Under the Snake's Skin by ckret2 reviews
Ever since he was a little boy, Orochimaru felt different, and it showed. Called many names by many people, most unpleasant, the one he most longed to hear was girl. Unfortunately, he'd rather die than let anyone know, and this tore her apart.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,032 - Reviews: 153 - Favs: 131 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 12/14/2007 - Published: 6/21/2007 - Orochimaru, Hiruzen S.
Of Sand and Sermons by Diamond Mask reviews
Hidan realises that perhaps a practical demonstration of his religious beliefs isn't the best way to convert someone. Hidan x Temari. Crackfic.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,427 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 155 - Follows: 14 - Published: 11/24/2007 - Hidan, Temari - Complete
The Mating Frenzy by MSkyDragons reviews
After the attacks by Orochimaru and the Sand, Konoha’s population is dangerously low. Desperate times call for extreme measures, and Tsunade issues a priority S class mission to every Leaf ninja: to pair off and start making babies!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 33 - Words: 70,171 - Reviews: 6934 - Favs: 5,140 - Follows: 2,087 - Updated: 11/22/2007 - Published: 7/24/2006 - Naruto U. - Complete
A Mutual Understanding by firefly reviews
In which Hidan plays the empathetic ear to Hinata's lamentations in the middle of the night, in the cafeteria, over ice cream and chocolate. AU RP based crackfic.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,128 - Reviews: 314 - Favs: 758 - Follows: 61 - Published: 11/22/2007 - Hinata H., Hidan - Complete
Afterwards by Mazuku reviews
ItaKisa, oneshot. Kisame wonders why Itachi finds intimacy so awkward.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 468 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 6 - Published: 10/27/2007 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
Wonder by ckret2 reviews
Itachi tries not to think about his massacre. He doesn't even remember why it happened. But now Itachi must find out why Tobi reminds him of the Uchiha clan, unless he wants to relive the massacre. This time, he and Tobi might not survive it. [Tobito fic]
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 15,372 - Reviews: 264 - Favs: 300 - Follows: 153 - Updated: 10/26/2007 - Published: 3/25/2007 - Itachi U., Obito U./Tobi - Complete
Enigma by Mazuku reviews
Kisame knows he will never understand Itachi. ItaKisa, oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,153 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/8/2007 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
Paying A Compliment by firefly reviews
It was a fact of life Kakuzu had come to accept. When you were as good looking as Hidan, people tended to treat you like a god. Funnily enough, Kakuzu couldn't recall ever getting the same treatment.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,912 - Reviews: 249 - Favs: 825 - Follows: 69 - Published: 9/27/2007 - Kakuzu, Hidan - Complete
Rendezvous Point by firefly reviews
You shouldn't be over self confident with your first impressions of people. Common advice for most, but for Temari, that truth only comes through with a series of firsthand experiences. HidanTemari friendship. AU.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,943 - Reviews: 177 - Favs: 354 - Follows: 33 - Published: 9/22/2007 - Hidan, Temari - Complete
Questionable Alliances by screamin-psiren reviews
I'm the little girl, who protects the monster. GaaraO.C., TemariShikamaru, NejiHinata.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 75,109 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 87 - Updated: 9/11/2007 - Published: 1/31/2006 - Gaara, Naruto U.
Curious Itachi Meets The Friendly Puppy by Ninjagrrl reviews
Extremely cracky, Akatsuki centric humour, in which Itachi meets his new guide dog, Mr Whiffles. May possibly be some sort of cry for help.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,313 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/31/2007 - Itachi U. - Complete
The Jailer by coalesce reviews
[SasuHina] Obsessed with reviving his clan, Sasuke kidnaps Hinata and imprisons her. She is to give birth to his children, the hybrids of the Byakugan and Sharingan. What he didn't call for, however, was falling in love with his prisoner.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,239 - Reviews: 326 - Favs: 272 - Follows: 285 - Updated: 8/24/2007 - Published: 5/7/2007 - Hinata H., Sasuke U.
Three Kisses and other cliches by deaka reviews
Luke & Mara one shot AU, following the Thrawn trilogy
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,319 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/11/2007 - Luke S., Mara Jade - Complete
Face Value by firefly reviews
In the three days she has remaining to dispose of her target, Temari has to make a choice: stick to protocol and accomplish the mission, or sate her fascination with a certain missing Falls nin. Kakuzu x Temari.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 19,952 - Reviews: 219 - Favs: 348 - Follows: 27 - Published: 8/4/2007 - Temari, Kakuzu - Complete
Shellshock by Ayumi Elric reviews
Some people can enter a war and simply kill people with no effect.Others can't pull the trigger until they see their lives at stake.And others still can't learn to kill until it's too late, and they lose someone before they can fight.Ed's one of them.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 5 - Words: 9,799 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 7/14/2007 - Published: 3/6/2007 - Edward E.
Violet Skies by katiekitten reviews
It was at that moment she felt certain, no, absolutely positive of one single thing: Kankuro must die. HidanTema AU fic. Rated T for language.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,518 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 26 - Published: 6/26/2007 - Hidan, Temari
The Future is Right Here by SWaddict1986 reviews
Jaina and Zekk realize that being Joined means more than it seems. This opens up a new turn for their friendship.
New Jedi Order - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 5,440 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 6/25/2007 - Published: 5/28/2007 - Complete
Leader! by Emerald707 reviews
In which, the Akatsuki must perform an embarrassing ritual they know all too well.
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 431 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 8 - Published: 5/30/2007 - Deidara, Sasori - Complete
Role Reversal by Muffytaj reviews
When Inner Sakura and Itachi clash in Tsukuyomi the results are... interesting. After all, Inner Sakura is the ultimate seme.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 298 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 270 - Follows: 23 - Published: 4/14/2007 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
Oh, Brother! by Sanarina reviews
There's something wrong with Itachi! Besides being a mass murderer, that is...
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,139 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/14/2007 - Sasuke U., Itachi U. - Complete
Sundried Palaver by firefly reviews
It was incredibly rare to find a person so pathetic and deprived of love and affection that they’d turn to someone like him for comfort. Love, Zetsu realized, and humanity’s selfish desire for it, had bestowed him with a sense of normalcy.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,185 - Reviews: 256 - Favs: 621 - Follows: 49 - Published: 4/7/2007 - Zetsu - Complete
Religious Artwork by ckret2 reviews
Hidan's obsessed with Jashin. Deidara's obsessed with explosions. But they can still share a hobby. Of course, that's bad news for anyone around them. [Oneshot, crackfic.]
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,233 - Reviews: 160 - Favs: 598 - Follows: 51 - Published: 4/7/2007 - Hidan, Deidara - Complete
A Natural Progression by desolate butterfly reviews
[KisaIta, drabble] Itachi finds nothing particularly enthralling about masturbation until Kisame starts watching him do it.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 500 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 11 - Published: 1/18/2007 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
Piano Man and Church Boy by firefly reviews
Hidan and Itachi have to work together to assassinate their target, and due to circumstaces beyond their control, have to crash a wedding to do so.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,946 - Reviews: 623 - Favs: 1,601 - Follows: 131 - Published: 12/5/2006 - Hidan, Itachi U. - Complete
Coffee Table Talk by firefly reviews
Meet Hidan, the religious fanatic. Meet Temari of the Sand, the no nonsense sister of Kankuro and Gaara. Watch what happens when they both happen to run into each other. Crackfic.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,721 - Reviews: 223 - Favs: 565 - Follows: 55 - Published: 11/30/2006 - Temari, Hidan - Complete
Carry On Dancing by firefly reviews
If Hidan ever found himself capable, he was totally going to sacrifice the Leader to his God for making him dance. Crackfic!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,930 - Reviews: 229 - Favs: 590 - Follows: 59 - Published: 11/5/2006 - Hidan, Obito U./Tobi - Complete
How Neji Got His Groove Back by Lady Silvamord reviews
[part two of two] So, Neji's got game. It's undeniable. After drinking Shikamaru and Sakura under the table, he's managed to blackmail Sakura into dinner with his family...which is not a date. It is complete, utter, shameless blackmail...right?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,295 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 216 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 10/10/2006 - Published: 10/4/2006 - Neji H., Sakura H. - Complete
Methods of Persuasion by firefly reviews
Tobi glanced around, noticing that the Leader, Deidara, and Kisame were watching Hidan as though he was about to put on a show. He didn’t understand why, since Hidan was merely conversing with the cable man about the TV. Warning: extreme profanity ahead!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,840 - Reviews: 343 - Favs: 1,167 - Follows: 99 - Published: 10/6/2006 - Hidan, Obito U./Tobi - Complete
Ruth by firefly reviews
Hating one person, truly hating one person, he learned, required hating everybody else. Sasuke tried to early on and failed miserably.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,292 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 331 - Follows: 27 - Published: 9/23/2006 - Sasuke U. - Complete
The Idiot's Guide to Rescue Situations by afrai reviews
Renji's had better days. IRR, AU.
Bleach - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,553 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 227 - Follows: 18 - Published: 8/25/2006 - Renji A. - Complete
Cause for Conversation by firefly reviews
Hinata has always been intimidated by Sasuke, but when she serves as a substitute for Sakura on a mission, she comes to learn that the stoic Uchiha is not so bad after all.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,866 - Reviews: 279 - Favs: 836 - Follows: 76 - Published: 8/1/2006 - Sasuke U., Hinata H. - Complete
Long Live the Queen by The Hart and Hound reviews
Sing a song of sixpence, a pocket full of rye...[The matriarch of the Uchiha clan is not blind to her son's intentions. A story of Mikoto's joining the clan and her perpetual stumbling to the end before her. Onesided ItachiMikoto, Uchihacest.]
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 13,611 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 242 - Follows: 17 - Published: 7/23/2006 - Mikoto U., Itachi U. - Complete
Confessions of an Avenger by sharingank reviews
In which the mighty heir of Uchiha keeps a journal...Language, spoilers...oh yes. Chapter 2 is up! Even more spoilers, so watch out!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,502 - Reviews: 237 - Favs: 342 - Follows: 209 - Updated: 7/14/2006 - Published: 8/11/2005
Genshi by lastyearsthing reviews
Continuation of the story Loophole Three years have passed and Sakura is still in Konoha with a new occupation. Hunternin. Even though an enemy, Itachi is still in her mind.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 24,169 - Reviews: 1169 - Favs: 1,735 - Follows: 363 - Updated: 6/27/2006 - Published: 5/6/2006 - Sakura H., Itachi U. - Complete
I Feel Pretty by kasey8473 reviews
Anakin dons a frilly ballgown as a disguise on assignment. The usual sort of mishaps occur. A companion piece to 'The Long Road Back'. Story complete.
Star Wars - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,222 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/15/2006 - Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan K. - Complete
Brain Freeze by sharingank reviews
Among other things, Gaara is protective of his ice cream. Sand sibs oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,531 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 177 - Follows: 25 - Published: 6/5/2006
sensus tactilis by icefalcon reviews
Uchihacest. [Kisame POV] Itachi didn't touch people.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,303 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 155 - Follows: 9 - Published: 5/14/2006 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Loophole by lastyearsthing reviews
Sakura formulates her own plan to get Sasuke back. Unfortunately, using Itachi as part of the plan is a huge gamble. Itasaku. Spoilers up to manga 235
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 86,457 - Reviews: 3368 - Favs: 3,688 - Follows: 937 - Updated: 2/8/2006 - Published: 6/9/2005 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
Inside Out by Sintari reviews
Some things endure through ash and fire. NejiHinata.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,743 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 112 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/25/2006 - Neji H., Hinata H. - Complete
And Dream Skies Darken by ShisoLoveli reviews
Sasuke isn't the only one who has nightmares. Hints of HinataxSasuke.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,171 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 11 - Published: 10/30/2005
Rosemary For Remembrance by Sintari reviews
Hyuga is a house with many rooms. A Neji & Hinata centered fic. Expect madness, love, sex, and murder. This is the story of two lives and as such the parings will change. NaruHina, NejiHina. COMPLETE. Part One of the Invictus Arc.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 40,119 - Reviews: 522 - Favs: 782 - Follows: 98 - Updated: 10/18/2005 - Published: 1/11/2005 - Neji H., Hinata H. - Complete
OBI WAN KENOBI Owner's Guide and Manual by lalaithien reviews
The Owner's Guide goes Geek! Includes handy tips and specifications for the highly-anticipated OBI-WAN unit, Mk II. With thanks to Theresa Green. :)
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,556 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/1/2005 - Obi-Wan K.
How & Why by randomsomeone reviews
A psychological war gets completely out of control. Lust doesn't cut it and love doesn't just happen, so how else can it work? GaaSaku, Finished!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 25,088 - Reviews: 768 - Favs: 2,072 - Follows: 234 - Updated: 2/20/2005 - Published: 11/2/2004 - Gaara, Sakura H. - Complete
Star Wars Summer School by Vegesa SSJ Jedi Knight reviews
Hey, wouldn't it be great to live in the Star Wars Universe? Better yet, go to school in the Star Wars Universe? Well, here's what happened when someone did! Screeming, detention, Cheerios, and force choking shall ensue!
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 28,780 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 14 - Updated: 3/30/2003 - Published: 8/21/2002
JHS Ba-By! by bluwitch reviews
Stuff I have discoverd in band. Go Lady Tromboners!!! Oh yeah, and some things are not from my own brain (Most of the director stuff isn't) Don't hurt me! *cringes* And there is bad language!
Marching Band - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 551 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/20/2001
Be Evil by Sugar Orion reviews
Xanatos offers some advise for the grads
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 995 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/21/2001
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Curiouser and Curiouser reviews
Tasked with preventing the Uchiha Massacre, the Hokage does the only logical thing: arrange a marriage between the heirs of their two biggest clans. This is the aftermath. Non-Massacre AU, eventually ItaHina. Incomplete.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 60 - Words: 28,041 - Reviews: 634 - Favs: 253 - Follows: 367 - Updated: 3/18 - Published: 3/31/2011 - Itachi U., Hinata H.
The Deal reviews
Karin found out the hard way that double crossing an Uchiha never added up to any good. AUish, Itachi/Karin. Incomplete.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 910 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/13/2013 - Karin, Itachi U.
Blindly reviews
Rewrite! AU-ish, pre-timeskip. ItachixOC. One informant is not worth a pair of Akatsuki, they realized. Incomplete.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,250 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 7/11/2012 - Published: 3/31/2011 - Itachi U., Kisame H.
Not so Different reviews
"Do you ever wonder if we're in the wrong business?" ItaKisa, KisaIta. Oneshot. Citrusy, more a lemon zing than anything.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 706 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/9/2012 - Itachi U., Kisame H. - Complete
Ministrations reviews
And when he woke up, he stabbed himself. A lot. Written at 2 am in a daze. Crack. Oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 211 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/5/2012 - Hidan - Complete
Apathy is Death reviews
AU. SasuHina. Sasuke investigates the systematic killing of the Uchiha family, and ends up dragged into an even bigger fiasco than he ever imagined. Post-cyberpunk-ish. Incomplete. Warning: mentions of death/suicide.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,655 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 10/2/2011 - Published: 4/17/2011 - Sasuke U., Hinata H.
Dichotomy reviews
AU. ItaSasu in the most messed up way possible. An exploration of the border between love and hate; the line, when it is crossed, and what happens after. Rated for language and a certain level of fridge horror, though YMMV as always. Darkfic. Complete.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Tragedy - Chapters: 16 - Words: 24,135 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 8/2/2011 - Published: 11/23/2010 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Spontaneity reviews
FemshepxGarrus. Shepard gets drunk and has a few stories to tell. Garrus listens. Oneshot, Post Suicide mission.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,678 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 7 - Published: 7/16/2011 - Garrus V., Shepard (F) - Complete
From the Vaults of Musubi No Kami reviews
Pieces of romances great and small. Drabbles, various pairings. Ch3: ItaSaku, Steps.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 339 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 6/29/2011 - Published: 6/7/2011
Hot Sake reviews
The turning point in their acquaintance, Itachi decided, was when she lightly smacked him on the buttocks as he got up to leave. ItaTsu, ItachixTsunade, Pure crack. Oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,757 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/27/2010 - Itachi U., Tsunade S. - Complete
The Tyrant God reviews
Uchihacest, ItaSasu, ItachixSasuke. The rule of silence could never be broken. That was the one rule they had adhered to, and its breaking led to chaos. Rated M for obvious reasons. Oneshot. EDIT: improved upon.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,645 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/16/2010 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Silent Noise reviews
HidanxOC. FRIENDSHIP. A lost girl in a forest, with nowhere to go. Hidan finds her by mischance. Kumogakure spirals out of the Raikage's control. The usual stuff. EDIT: Discontinued.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,310 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 9/3/2010 - Published: 8/11/2007 - Hidan - Complete
Tape and Glue reviews
ItaSaku if you squint. AU. Character study. A chance meeting sparks an unexpected friendship. Oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,457 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/3/2010 - Itachi U., Sakura H. - Complete
Circumstantially reviews
ItaSaku. Sakura decided to follow Sasuke, who went after Naruto, who was with Jiraiya, who was searching for Tsunade, whom they needed to heal Kakashi, who was incapacitated by Itachi. AU. DISCONTINUED.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,724 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 6/8/2009 - Published: 5/29/2008 - Itachi U., Sakura H.
Bruce Wayne: should look before he leaps! reviews
Oneshot, humor. Maybe crack? Anyway, Dr. Crane visits Wayne Manor and gets a little...surprise.
Batman Begins/Dark Knight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 467 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/21/2008 - Bruce W./Batman, J. Crane - Complete
Mirror reviews
SasukexOC. They will save each other from what they fear. Complete.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 6 - Words: 6,939 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 10/2/2008 - Published: 6/3/2008 - Sasuke U. - Complete
Repulsed Fascination reviews
CandyxCarrion. AU. After all, what beauty is there without something hideous to equal that beauty? On Hiatus. Writer's block.
Abarat series - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,816 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 2/2/2008 - Published: 2/1/2008
Monotony reviews
Character Study. Itachi stood over the corpse of his brother, half expecting it to jerk to life and land a killing blow. Oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,092 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Published: 7/30/2007 - Itachi U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Reflecting reviews
I find your lack of Hoole disturbing." /Vader, just a strange free verse poem I wrote for no particular reason. Anybody who's read the Galaxy of Fear series needs no introduction to Mammon Hoole, whose POV I am exploiting.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 175 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 7/6/2007 - Complete