YoullNeverCatchMeAliveSaidHe
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Joined 02-21-19, id: 12058842, Profile Updated: 06-11-19
Author has written 4 stories for Harry Potter, and Lord of the Rings.

I love books, and writing.

I like writing about Harry Potter (and some times LOTR's)

I am Australian, I use Australian english spelling and probably some Australian idioms and slang.

User name is a reference to one of Banjo Patterson's works. He's one of my favourite poets. Points if you know which one it's from.

I am dyslexic, so my spelling is not great but I make up for it though a passion for what it do.

Blanket Disclaimer. Unless specifically stated otherwise, none of the work I post here is truly mine, it's all FanFiction. If you recognise it, it's not mine. Books used as a base for my fan fictions herein are not, they are the belong to their true and original authors (mostly JK and JRRT) who I acknowledge to be literary genius's.

Also found of Archive of Our Own under same Pen Name, and Wattpad under 'NeverCatchMeAlive'

No Flames please

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Outrage by puppy-on-crack reviews
Sequel to Rage. Fourth year is finally over and Harry can relax. Things are starting to look up, right until they aren't. Fifth year is coming and with it does a new villain, dressed in pink and hellbent on making Harry seem a liar. Under her draconian rule Harry will have to balance his own mental health, a headmaster ignoring him, and old/new friends. This is bullsh*t Snape/OMC
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 11 - Words: 41,203 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 840 - Follows: 1,418 - Updated: 5/9/2019 - Published: 11/24/2017
That Dreaded Puppy Story by puppy-on-crack reviews
In which Alex Dawsen gets into a bar room brawl over puppies. Severus watches on because, really, it is so much fun. A snippet from my Rage series, a bit of a prequel. Just a short look into their life.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,472 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 27 - Published: 4/1/2017 - Severus S., OC - Complete
Harry Potter with the Power the Dark Lord Knows Not by BakenandEggs reviews
After a summer spent attending Quidditch World Cup games and tutoring sessions, Harry returns to Hogwarts for his fourth year of schooling with plans to study hard, have fun, play Quidditch and become an animagus. Too bad there's a Tournament that gets in the way. The fourth (and final) part in my series, 'Harry Potter in the Claw of the Raven'.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Adventure - Chapters: 51 - Words: 184,027 - Reviews: 2149 - Favs: 4,059 - Follows: 2,746 - Updated: 2/13/2017 - Published: 7/18/2016 - [Harry P., Daphne G.] Draco M. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Interlude by BakenandEggs reviews
As Harry gets used to living with Sirius and Remus, he, along with his friends and family, must deal with the knowledge of Voldemort's return. What will this mean for Harry's friendship with the Most Ancient and Noble House of Malfoy? The third part in my series, 'Harry Potter in the Claw of the Raven'.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 38,068 - Reviews: 359 - Favs: 2,570 - Follows: 1,298 - Updated: 7/18/2016 - Published: 5/17/2016 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Harry Potter at the Knees of the Marauders' by BakenandEggs reviews
Harry returns to Hogwarts for his second year. A year that will be filled with books, good friends, basilisks, quidditch, prattish friends, horrible dreams, and pranks.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 27 - Words: 99,434 - Reviews: 789 - Favs: 3,830 - Follows: 2,400 - Updated: 5/17/2016 - Published: 12/2/2015 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Harry Potter in the Claw of the Raven by BakenandEggs reviews
When a more studious Harry Potter entered Gringotts with Hagrid, the Goblins managed to talk to him privately - Dumbledore never saw that one coming. A Ravenclaw Harry story. Warning: child abuse, character bashing, and pureblood society.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 56,257 - Reviews: 625 - Favs: 6,064 - Follows: 3,205 - Updated: 12/26/2015 - Published: 9/8/2015 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Discovering Magic by The Artistic Fool reviews
At dinner before the World Cup, Bill does something strange that shocks and angers Molly. What did he do? Why does it make Ron think he's a Dark Wizard? Harry asks these questions and more as he slowly learns things he never knew about Magic, and comes to know and count on Bill during his trying 4th year, and beyond.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 31,945 - Reviews: 469 - Favs: 1,414 - Follows: 1,874 - Updated: 5/20/2015 - Published: 7/20/2012 - Harry P., Bill W.
Liquid Season by Humbuggy reviews
"Care to join?" Charlie asks, holding the bottle out in easy invitation. Harry shrugs in a parody of careless movement, "Why the hell not?" He said. It is a small exchange but what it causes is not, and there is no going back for either of them. Charlie/Harry, Slash, Idiots falling in love and not telling each other. Some under-age with consent.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 37,916 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 110 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 5/17/2015 - Published: 3/17/2015 - Complete
Gray Skye Mourning by KneazleGriff reviews
As Severus Snape lay dying on the filthy floor of the Shrieking Shack, bleeding in the arms of Harry Potter, a profound, devastating realization awakens a long lost love, latent for years and torn asunder by time's cruel fate. Is love strong enough to overcome the pain from the past and ensure Severus' survival? Time-Travel fic. SSHP - COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 19 - Words: 183,486 - Reviews: 996 - Favs: 2,508 - Follows: 1,377 - Updated: 12/24/2013 - Published: 7/13/2012 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Love In the Dark by Hecateslover reviews
Growing up on the streets did not prepare Harry for magic school. Then again, Hogwarts isn't prepared for him either. HPSS, many other pairings. SLASH, HET, FemSLASH, Dark!Harry. Rated M for a reason. Harry/Dean friendship. Deleted last chapter, will be continuing story after long hiatus!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 49 - Words: 217,168 - Reviews: 1749 - Favs: 1,768 - Follows: 1,403 - Updated: 5/29/2012 - Published: 12/24/2010 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Holly by Hecateslover reviews
After Voldemort is gone, Harry struggles to find himself in a world with too many expectations. He just wants to be happy, is that too much to ask? Slow moving HP/SS. More warnings inside. Rated M for a reason. Complete!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 33 - Words: 124,945 - Reviews: 863 - Favs: 1,769 - Follows: 667 - Updated: 10/5/2011 - Published: 7/30/2011 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Daughter of Time by wednesday-mc reviews
Very AU & Alt Reality. Legolas never left Middle-Earth, but stayed behind to look after Aragorn's children--most specifically the first-born daughter of each generation. This generation's daughter was never prepared to believe in Elves, much less Legolas.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 45 - Words: 184,054 - Reviews: 1467 - Favs: 904 - Follows: 597 - Updated: 6/25/2009 - Published: 5/18/2008 - Legolas
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Harry Potter gets smart and takes control - the goblet reviews
Harry's name comes out of the goblet and he's had enough, he's sick of pretending to be stupid and constantly fighting against the whole world. It's time to step up. This is a long and a slow build though, spanning most of the fourth year. There will be no over night changes, trauma recovery takes time, months. He's not going to wake up and start ass kicking the next day.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 91 - Words: 476,491 - Reviews: 1843 - Favs: 2,820 - Follows: 3,587 - Updated: 6/4/2021 - Published: 6/11/2019 - Harry P.
Harry has a twin reviews
Harry has a twin, she's very smart, but she grew up seperate from Harry, in a not so great upbringing. She is also not biologically James' daughter. She to struggles navigating the wizarding world as not only a Muggle-raised Slytherin but also while blind. Will Hogwarts provide an escape from her horrible Muggle life or will it be even harder? and will she find family there?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 22,095 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 2/16/2021 - Published: 6/11/2019
Harry Potter gets smart and takes control - out-take chp 11 reviews
This is part of my Harry gets smart series. It is an out-take of chp11. After Filius talks to Harry, he goes to see Lily's old friend in order to help her son.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 957 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 23 - Published: 7/26/2019 - F. Flitwick - Complete
An Ordinary Day for You
This is a Short Story Loosely connected to Modernday MiddleEarth Written from a Writers Prompt back when I was in school, years ago. Nothing serious. "A knock at the door catches you off guard. Upon answering it, you are greeted by a man who says he's from the future and he can prove it. Most importantly, he has information that could save your life."
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 995 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/11/2019 - Complete