HP-Love and Smut Stories
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Joined 02-25-07, id: 1228011, Profile Updated: 03-26-09
Author has written 4 stories for Harry Potter.

Updated: 6-15-2007

Setsuna-X:
This is an account where different type of Love and Smut summaries are written for very odd and never existant couples in the Harry Potter series. Anyone is welcome to take a summary and write a story for it (let me know if you have!), and if you need any help please email or message me.

Background Note/Disclaimer/Whatever--

tami3: These were done all in good digusting fun when we bored in class and felt like mocking/parodying the terrible randomness of pairings in the HP fandom. coughDracoRon! We were also having a discussion about how HORRIBLE fanfiction still got good reviews; thus we came up with our mission statement. Flood the net with such AWFUL, UNGODLY, VOMIT-INDUCING fanfiction that reviewers are FORCED to speak up!

None of us consider any of these pairings to be serious, so don't bother telling us we're sick. We know. That's the point. :-) All of us behind this account like fanfiction and in no way wish to cast a negative light on it. (Life would be just so boring without people's strange taste in matchingmaking.) Nor do we sincerely endorse nonconsensual (or hell, consensual) couplings between/with magical beings/flora/fauna/paraphenalia. Do not note us how Ginny/Dumbledore/the whomping willow are not even anatomically suited for such acts, because we're challenging your imagination! XP

New!! --
Now See Here-
Chapter 3 up!!
Multiplier of Love- Chapter 3 up!!
_
Story Ideas:

The Next Great Adventure-Harry Potter (2nd year+) Ford Angelina is bored of all the trees in the Forbidden Forest and goes after the only one willing to put up a fight. Ford Angelina x Whomping Willow (smut) General/Romance

I Wanna go to Hogwarts too!-Harry Potter (2nd year+) Dudley wanted to know what was so special of Harry's school so he convinced his father to take him there. Who knew that creatures in the Forbidden Forest were so beautiful? Dudley x Unicorn x Vernon (smut) General/Romance

The Need to Hold-Harry Potter (2nd year) No longer able to love from afar, the squid from the lake sees his chance and takes it, no matter what the odds. Petrified Hermione x Squid from the Lake (smut) General/Romance

Last Chance-Harry Potter (7th year) Dumbledore's death was hard on the Wizarding World, but a ritual found by both Voldemort and Harry might be able to save them all or will the darkness consume everything? Dead Dumbledore x Harry x Harry's wand x Voldemort (plot/smut) Drama/ Angst/ Action

Midnight Stroll-Harry Potter (3rd year) Hogwarts always seems cold, quiet, and lonely for Mrs. Norris as she tries to help her master catch the trouble makers after hours, but not after she met another night strolling creature. Mrs. Norris x Sirius (as animagus) (smut) Romance/General

Or I’ll Eat You-Harry Potter (4th-5th year) Winky goes to her old masters’ house, Mr. Couch, when she stumbled upon a most gruesome, yet alluring scene. Nagini, the Dark Lord’s familiar, was devouring the remaining house elves that resided in the manor. “Come to me…” hissed Nagini as Winky found her little feet moving on their own. Winky x Nagini (smut) Angst/Romance (Prologue up!!)

Metal and Nature-Harry Potter (Beginning of 5th year) Voldemort finally finds a way onto Hogwarts grounds; through the Whomping Willow. He notices a motorcycle leaning against the trunk. Before he could even take one step further a branch wraps around his waist and he’s in for a long night with the two animate objects. Voldemort x Motorcycle (Sirius’) x Whomping Willow (plot/rape) Angst/General

Wounded Heart-Harry Potter (2nd year +) After being rejected by yet another girl for the school ball Neville runs back to his room in tears. There on his bed he spots his only and always best friend, Trevor, who knows exactly how to heal Neville’s heart. Neville x Trevor (smut) Romance/ slight Angst

Big and Small-Harry Potter (Beginning of 5th year) In a detention with Hagrid, Draco is to help the ‘big oaf’ with his even bigger oaf of a brother, Grawp. When Hagrid is called away to the castle for an emergency meeting, what else were two beings to do to pass the time? Draco x Grawp (smut) General/Romance (Chapter 2 up!!)

Third Corridor-Harry Potter (3rd year) While running away from the shrieking fat lady, the portrait guardian to Gryffindor Tower, Sirius ends up at the forbidden third corridor, where he encounters his greatest challenge after twelve years in Azkaban. Sirius x Fluffy (smut) Drama/General

Charms and Plants-Harry Potter (2nd year) Professor Flitwick traveled one afternoon to retrieve something for Madame Pomfrey, but Professor Sprout was no where to be seen. He looked around for a bit until his eyes fell upon one of the plotted mandrake plants. He could not take his eyes off it and soon found himself entranced by the crying, little fauna. Prof. Flitwick x Mandrake (smut) Romance

The Death Seer-Harry Potter (5th year) One day while wandering Hogwarts grounds Luna finds where the Threstals are being kept when they’re not pulling the carriages. Drawn in by their extraordinary demeanor, Luna gets in for a closer look and soon can’t escape them. Luna x Threstal (smut) General/Romance

I’ll tell You a Secret (Ear Whisperer/Here’s More Dirt)-Harry Potter (5th year) Draco heads off for his weekly report to Rita Skeeter, reporter for the Daily Prophet, in an abandoned classroom, but the constant transfiguration spell Moody had placed on him hadn’t worn off yet. Well, might as well make the most of it. Draco (as a Ferret) x Rita Skeeter (as a beetle; animagus) (smut) Romance

You Can’t Keep That Here! (Now See Here!)-Harry Potter (4th Year) After the second event of the Triwizard Tournament Percy wanders into the Forbidden Forest for more dirt on Dumbledore, but ends up getting lost instead. He continues to travel further in until he reaches the grove where many eight-legged creatures reside, and they aren’t about to let him go. Percy x Aragog (smut/rape) Angst (Chapter 3 up!!)

Inner Eye (Inner Eye Leads to Love)-Harry Potter (5th year) Crying her eyes out at being replaced by a centaur, Firenze, Trelawney runs to the new Divination classroom to give the beast a piece of her mind. Upon arrival Trelawney takes a second glance at the majestic creature before her, and instead of her mind she gives him a piece of her heart. Trelawney x Firenze (smut) Romance

My Master (Rise and Shine)-Harry Potter (any year) Delivering a letter to her master on early Saturday morning was always her favorite time. She would end up connecting with her master on a whole new level, closer than any other pet and owner. Hedwig’s beak x Harry’s scar (smut) General

Dangling Attraction-Harry Potter (summer of 5th year) Bill was visiting the Weasley home after an Order meeting and opted to take a nap before anyone else arrived. Pigwidgeon, or Pig for short, was the only other living creature left in the house for emergencies. When Pig heard the door open he fluttered down to greet the guest, only to find them asleep. He was then distracted by something glimmering in the sunlight…a very alluring something. Pig x Bill’s earring (smut) Romance/General

Taking Your Soul (To Take Your Soul/” …” and Your Heart)-Harry Potter (3rd year/or beginning of 6th) After inspecting Azkaban prison himself, Fudge makes a wrong turn and ends up face to face with a menacing Dementor. Whenever he tries to get away something always pulls him back, is it the dark magic of a Dementor, or his own heart? Fudge x Dementor (smut) Angst/Romance

Gambling Away Love (Drunken Love/Love’s a Game)-Harry Potter (4th year) A night of heavy drinking and much gambling with his fellow mates, a Leprechaun and a Goblin, not only leave Ludo Bagman broke in his pockets, but also broken hearted. Ludo x Leprechan x Goblin (smut) Romance/Angst

Slimy, yet Satisfying (To Love a Magical Creature)-Harry Potter (2nd year) After regurgitating the slugs from his own rebounded curse, Hagrid instructs Ron to feed them to the Blast Ended Skrewts. Not wanting anyone to see, Ron decides to go alone. If he thought that Blast Ended Skrewts were hard to handle, he hadn’t seen anything yet if the slugs had anything to say. Ron x Blast Ended Skrewts x Slugs(smut) General/Romance

Take Care of You (Potions and Magical Creatures/Never Listen to Dumbledore)-Harry Potter (3rd year) Why did he end up taking care of the wretched hippogriff while it was on death row? How is it that he could never say ‘no’ to Dumbledore, especially when he knew that anything the ‘old coot’ asks of him always ends up as a disaster in some way? And what is it about Buckbeak that makes his heart beat faster? Snape x Buckbeak (smut) Angst/Romance

Forever Memories-Harry Potter (summer of 5th year) Cho Chang’s uncle is an Unspeakable from the Department of Mysteries in the Ministry of Magic. After the fiasco about Voldemort’s resurrection he’d been instructed to do research on the brains that had attacked Ron and was allowed to do them in his nieces’ home. Curiosity got the best of Cho as she found herself wrapped within the brains’ binds. ­Cho Chang x Brains from the Ministry (smut/rape) Angst/Action

A Day in Hogsmeade-Harry Potter (5th year) Lucius was taking a stroll in the Hogsmeade village, wishing to get away from his troubles for the moment. He spotted the famous store: Weasley’s Wizarding Weezers and decided to drop in and see what that blood-traitor Weasley and his sons were up to. Not seeing anyone in the shop Lucius spots a fluffy puffball on the counter. He slithers over and snatches the poor creature and walks briskly over to the infamous Shrieking Shack, with its rickety stairs and moldy wood. This combination of exhilaration of stealing in broad daylight and hiding out in a filthy shack oddly heightened his spirits. Lucius x Pygmypuff (Ginny’s) x Shrieking Shack (smut) General

Multiplier of Love-Harry Potter (3rd year +) Ginny tries to brew an obscure Love Potion to make Harry fall in love with her, but manages to botch it up and have it explode on her. Now there are multiple Ginny’s running around Hogwarts and they fall in love with whomever they meet! Can someone actually turn down the loving, little red head? Ginny x Everyone (smut) Romance/Humor (Chapter 3 up!!)

Roaming the Field-Harry Potter (4th year) Fenir stalked the forests near the Weasley home during the summer, hoping for some prey to wander by, when something came flying toward him and hit his head. Upon inspection he found out that it was nothing more than a Garden Gnome, which, when he thought about it, would be a wonderful stress release. Fenir x Garden Gnome (smut) General

The Flower GardenHarry Potter (3rd year) A fight between Slytherin Pansy and Gryffindor Lavender over a found Time Turner in the Library ends up taking the two girls to a new place and way back in time where other flower maidens lived. Lavender x Pansy x Lily (Evans) x Petunia (Evans) (Time/Place Travel)

Weasley Tricks (“ “ Lead to Love)-Harry Potter (Summer of 4th year) After the twins gave Dudley the Ten Tongue Toffee, Dudley has been in want of something friskier. The twins popped back for another visit with their newest creation: The Wambobate! Dudley x Ten Tongue Toffee x Wambobate (smut) Humor/Romance

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Multiplier of Love reviews
Ginny tries to brew an obscure Love Potion to snag Harry, but it explodes. Now multiple Ginny’s are running around Hogwarts, falling in love with whomever they meet! Can someone actually turn down the lovable little red head? Ginny x Everyone [smut]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,194 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 6/15/2007 - Published: 3/13/2007 - Ginny W.
Now See Here! reviews
During the Triwizard Tournament Percy wanders into the Forbidden Forest for more dirt on Dumbledore, but ends up getting lost. He reaches the grove where many eightlegged creatures reside, and they aren’t about to let him go. Percy x Aragog [smut]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Horror - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,061 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 6/15/2007 - Published: 3/17/2007 - Percy W.
Big and Small reviews
Draco is to help the ‘big oaf’ with his even bigger oaf of a brother, Grawp in a detention. When Hagrid is called away to the castle, what else were two beings to do? Draco x Grawp [smut]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,389 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 4/18/2007 - Published: 3/25/2007 - Draco M., Grawp
Or I'll Eat You! reviews
Winky goes to her old master Mr. Crouch’s house where she stumbles upon a gruesome, yet alluring scene: Nagini, the Dark Lord’s familiar, devouring the remaining house elves... “Come to me…” Nagini hisses…Winky x Nagini [smut]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,211 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/18/2007