Tatooine92
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Poll: Which of the LONG stories--not one-shots--currently on my page do you like best? You may choose up to three, and be honest! Vote Now!
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Joined 03-26-07, id: 1246089, Profile Updated: 04-28-13
Author has written 18 stories for Star Wars, Star Wars, Maximum Ride, Mass Effect, Elder Scroll series, Dragon Age, and Ironman.

Kaysh meg miit'gaana, oyacyi — Who writes, remains.

Nu kyr'adyc, shi taab'echaaj'la — Not gone, merely marching far away.
(In memory of all the American soldiers who have given their lives in the name of freedom.)


ABOUT ME: I'm Tatooine92, and I write fanfic! (Duh, right?) A lot of it involves the Knights of the Old Republic game series and my two characters based off of them: Lire Dakaar (KotOR 1) and Metarie Keno (KotOR 2). Most of these KotOR tales are one-shots or short stories, but there are a handful of long stories. I may not put my one-shots here, but you may find them at

Now, we shall get to what you need to know about me in order to get along with me.


LIKES

- Carth Onasi
- Scorch (Delta 62/RC-1262)
- Atin (RC-3222)
- Boromir
- Kaidan Alenko
- F!Shenko fics
- FemRevan fics
- JaxSolo (http://www.fanfiction.net/jaxsolo, - She's mah bestie!)
- JS's Iron Man fic (Please read: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4614902/1/Iron_Bonds)
- writing (Why else would I be here?)
- video games


DISLIKES

- people who leave rude comments and insults
- improper grammar
- fics that have poor grammar, excessive spelling errors, and poor sentence structure.
- fics that don't maintain the canon characters' original personalities.
- "I Love Lucy"
- SLASHFICS. I don't care if it's M/M or F/F; it's all unacceptable to me. Don't like that? Tough.


FANDOMS

- Star Wars
- SW: Knights of the OldRepublic
- Republic Commando (game and the books)
- The Chronicles of Narnia
- Maximum Ride
- Indiana Jones
- "Firefly" (and Serenity the BDM)
- Marvel movieverse
- Lord of the Rings
- Elder Scrolls
- X-Men


STORIES CURRENTLY IN PROGRESS — Enjoy as chapters come!

Laurels: A collection of related one-shots/vignettes featuring the adventures of the Nerevarine in Cyrodiil, where she is bestowed a new title, to her chagrin: the Heroine of Kvatch. Just when she was getting ready to retire, she becomes a hero again. Oh well. Life happens. Martin/OC fluffles, too!

Legacy: Iron Man movie-verse AU. See full description below!


COMPLETED STORIES — Enjoy them all over again!

Project Delilah: A "Maximum Ride" tale that takes place approximately four years after Saving the World and Other Extreme Sports—or approx. 2011. With the Flock still "on the loose," the Director of Itex has concocted a new plan of attack against them: one of their own kind. (A bit of OC X Iggy fluff, as well as OC X OC. Does not take The Final Warning into account and is thus written as if that book did not exist.)

Fett'ad: A girl is raised by Jango Fett, eventually becoming a bounty hunter herself and falling in love with an ARC trainee in the days before the dawn of the Clone Wars.

Memory (Fett'ad II): Rogue's adventures continue as she finds herself locked in a battle against losing the two things that mean everything to her: love and memories.

Jorad (Fett'ad III): Rogue returns, seventeen years older and seventeen years wiser, as a hunt saboteur who's gotten cozy with her life as it is... until an series of unexpected events turns her life upside down.

Parenthood: Delta Squad is faced with an unlikely assignment when they find a little girl and must learn the finer tricks of parenting. Not only are they faced with the struggles of such a task, but they are confronted with the difficulty of learning to say good-bye.

Finding Hawk: Revan's daughter embarks on a journey of selfdiscovery upon learning of her mother's past for fear of following in those footsteps.

A Tale of Two Cuties: Long one-shot. Parody. Combines elements of both KotOR games to make something so stupid it's hilarious.

Dark Day: A Knights of the Old Republic tale. It's just an ordinary day on Korriban, and it's just an ordinary plasma mine. But one wrong move that would ordinarily be easily forgiven brings with it horrible consequences, leaving Carth to struggle with a new affliction: blindness. (Uses my FemRevan, Lire Dakaar, a scout from Ord Mantell. Pre-Leviathan fiasco.)

Cry: A Mass Effect Shenko one-shot. Andromeda Shepard mourns the death of Corporal Toombs.

Five Minutes: Another Mass Effect Shenko one-shot. Very short. Andromeda Shepard and Kaidan share a fuzzy moment before Ilos. Pure fluff. I won't deny it: it's sweet enough to make one puke candy corn.


NOTES

Many, MANY thanks to JaxSolo http://www.fanfiction.net/jaxsolo or for allowing me to use her characters in my Fett'ad trilogy. I don't even want to know how stupid the story might be if some parts weren't a bridge to her Zero Line. Hugs!!

Another thanks to JaxSolo for helping me concoct a plot for Project Delilah. She's the one who created Derek, not to mention RPed him for me. Dang, I dunno what I'd do without my author friend. (showers sisterly love upon her)

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

A Paragon of Virtue by Sia Later reviews
Avery Shepard and Kaidan Alenko pick up the pieces after ME2. Rated M for language, violence and more later.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 36 - Words: 67,176 - Reviews: 216 - Favs: 182 - Follows: 151 - Updated: 2/9 - Published: 5/17/2010 - Shepard (F), Kaidan A. - Complete
Truth and Lies by Joisan reviews
KotOR 1: Ensign Andra Gelan has it all figured out... or so she thinks until a simple mission gets a lot more complicated than she expected.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 32 - Words: 113,179 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 8/8/2015 - Published: 6/8/2010 - Revan, Carth O.
50 Things That Tony Stark Is Not Allowed To Do by SilverHeart09 reviews
Pepper writes a list of all the things that Tony Stark isn't allowed to do. He finds it, hilarity ensues.
Ironman - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 10,391 - Reviews: 350 - Favs: 329 - Follows: 372 - Updated: 4/18/2014 - Published: 12/13/2009 - A. E. Stark/Tony, V. Potts/Pepper
How NOT to write Titanic fanfiction by Fomalhaut reviews
A bunch of craziness I wrote for fun, not to be taken seriously. I added a second chapter of insanity, please forgive me...
Titanic - Rated: T - English - Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,143 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 1/19/2013 - Published: 7/23/2008
Hell and Back by Jax Solo reviews
Iron Man 2 REMIX! Andy Stark is back, and this time her life's starting to fall apart: Tony's a jerk, the government wants their suits, and the reactors are failing. Of course, it's just the time when the past decides to rear up from the shadows...
Ironman - Rated: T - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 47,998 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 8/29/2012 - Published: 7/13/2010 - A. E. Stark/Tony, J. R. Rhodes/Rhodey - Complete
Sea Foam by silmelinde reviews
Childhood flashback. James' final moment. Character Death.
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 967 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/27/2012 - James N. - Complete
Bridge of Dreams by tehPrincess reviews
Lady Hawke/Sebastian Vael collection of one-shots. Silliness, smut, fluff, angst, and anything else my muse can dream up. Rated M for sensuality and sexual content.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 21,180 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 7/23/2012 - Published: 4/13/2011 - Hawke (F), Sebastian V.
Mass Ethics by AugustinianFrog reviews
A rather clueless Shepard and his crew are suddenly facing several minor problems that are doing a number on their sanity. Several dilemmas for future chapters are now being explored. Suggestions welcomed.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 59,219 - Reviews: 133 - Favs: 111 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 3/25/2012 - Published: 5/18/2008 - Complete
How to Keep a Toddler Locked in a Tower: A Guide by KingofJesters reviews
Frollo and Gothel's guide to keeping a child locked in a tower for fifteen years or more!
Crossover - Hunchback of Notre Dame & Tangled - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 2,976 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 4/4/2011 - Published: 3/25/2011 - M. Gothel - Complete
Still Warm Ashes by Clover64 reviews
Some people are meant to be in your life, for better or worse. Two years after the events of Kirkwall, Sebastian believes that chapter of his life closed - until a woman from his past resurfaces seeking refuge and forgiveness. Sebastian/F!Hawke.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,703 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 4/1/2011 - Published: 3/30/2011 - Sebastian V., Hawke (F)
Left Unfinished by Clover64 reviews
Not every story gets a happy ending. Per her final request, Varric tells Hawke about one that does. Set post-game, but no real spoilers. Sebastian/F!Hawke
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 789 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 7 - Published: 3/27/2011 - Hawke (M), Varric T. - Complete
All She Wants by Jax Solo reviews
For Andy Stark, Christmas was ruined when she was six years old. Post-IM2/Hell and Back, Tony/Andy bro/sis fluffle.
Ironman - Rated: K - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,568 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/25/2010 - A. E. Stark/Tony
Holiday Distortion by Invaderk reviews
Tony is a master of holiday mischief. Pepper isn't sure whether to laugh or cry.
Ironman - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,540 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 4 - Published: 12/17/2010 - A. E. Stark/Tony, V. Potts/Pepper - Complete
The Foolish Fancy of a Naive Boy by Aeowynn reviews
Cullen/Surana one shots. Written after getting inspired by Cme's ongoing Cullen Romance Mod. First fan fic piece I've ever written so constructive criticism is appreciated.
Dragon Age - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,520 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 17 - Published: 11/1/2010 - Surana, Cullen - Complete
From Her Eyes by Jax Solo reviews
Movieverse REMIX! Iron Bonds AU: Andy arrives in Malibu a few weeks before Tony's trip to Afghanistan. Can she face her demons in the treachery of Stane? Will she ever trust herself to tell Tony just what is wrong?
Ironman - Rated: T - English - Family/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 29,318 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 6/28/2010 - Published: 4/14/2010 - A. E. Stark/Tony - Complete
When She Needs Him by Hermia S reviews
Anders always seems to be nearby whenever Elissa Cousland finds herself in trouble. He does not entirely mind, and neither does she.
Dragon Age - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,394 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/27/2010 - Cousland, Anders - Complete
Waiting for First Light by Maeve's Child reviews
Just something sweet to read with your coffee.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 5 - Words: 9,127 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 1/14/2010 - Published: 11/20/2009 - Alistair, Cousland - Complete
He Knew by just ahlia reviews
F!Aeducan/Gorim drabble reflecting on their relationship after exile.
Dragon Age - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 236 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 6 - Published: 12/23/2009 - Aeducan, Gorim - Complete
Nights that matter by Lady Shandara reviews
A very short story about Lady Anya Aeducan and Gorim. Contains love and cuteness. Reviews are welcome.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,332 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 15 - Published: 12/13/2009 - Aeducan, Gorim - Complete
A Drink Too Far by Clover64 reviews
Alistair can't hold his booze. And neither can Bann Teagan, apparently. How do men settle their differences? Why, by a drinking contest, of course. Alistair/Fem!Cousland, implied possible Fem!Cousland/Teagan.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,344 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/24/2009 - Alistair, Cousland - Complete
Anyone can Listen by Zerbinetta reviews
What happens when our very own Mary Sue is given a chance to join the Dark Brotherhood by a very edgy and deadly yet somehow ruggedly handsome Speaker? Can she do it? Can Lucien remain in-character and sane? Can he stop Mary before she romances him? Hm.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 41,341 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 8/31/2009 - Published: 6/4/2008 - Lucien L. - Complete
The Fellowship Cooks Dinner by Nari-chan SND reviews
After a hard days worth of travelling, the Fellowship needs to make the most important descicion of their lives... who will cook dinner and what will they have? Rated what it is to be safe. Please R&R!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 17 - Words: 31,795 - Reviews: 184 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 8/7/2009 - Published: 10/11/2006
Xun by sinvraal reviews
The Normandy's outspoken pilot has an unexpected run-in with the other side. Post-game.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 9 - Words: 33,095 - Reviews: 106 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 7/30/2009 - Published: 6/1/2009 - Joker - Complete
More Days of Our Normandy Lives by R-I-C-A-R-D reviews
Another series of unconnected scenes with a view to showing the wackier side of life aboard the galaxy's favourite fastest ship in the fleet. In this series, Shepard receives the shock of her life, Liara learns how to throw a punch and more. Now updated.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 31,956 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 7/22/2009 - Published: 9/6/2008
Random Acts of Virmire by R-I-C-A-R-D reviews
Another take on 'the choice' and my first attempt at a parody. Special thanks to Knightfall whose recent fic on the subject put an idea in my head.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,193 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 10 - Published: 7/16/2009 - Shepard (F) - Complete
False Dilemma by Knightfall1138 reviews
Shepard holds the lives of two squadmates in his hands, but only has time enough to save one. Which one will he literally be forced to save?
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Parody/Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,145 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/20/2009 - Shepard (F) - Complete
Domus by sinvraal reviews
A sort of homecoming. Post-game Shenko fluff.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,707 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 11 - Published: 4/16/2009 - Shepard (F), Kaidan A. - Complete
Elder Scrolls Jokes by AdrianPetersonFan113 reviews
Over 600 veiwers! Yeah baby! I do need to stress, I can't do this without you guys. I am finite. I need your guys' jokes, and complaints telling me I suck. Switching over to new name : Elder Scrolls Jokes. Formally known as MURPHY'S LAW OF OBLVION.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,733 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 3/22/2009 - Published: 2/11/2009
Pazaak by tehPrincess reviews
KotOR 2: LSF Exile/Atton. Atton teaches the Exile how to play pazaak in her head.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,961 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/19/2009 - Atton R., Exile/Meetra Surik - Complete
Finding the Lost by CatsbytheGreat reviews
As Susan becomes more distant, her siblings are more determined to find out what is wrong, and get back the Susan who was a Queen of Narnia. A series of one-shots. Eventual spoilers for 'The Last Battle'.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Angst - Chapters: 16 - Words: 28,152 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 2/9/2009 - Published: 8/15/2008 - Susan Pevensie, Aslan - Complete
Nexus by tehPrincess reviews
LSF Revan and Carth. The defining moment in KotOR, choosing redemption over damnation, with Carth fluffiness included.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,571 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 18 - Published: 2/5/2009 - Carth O., Revan - Complete
Alas, Alas' cried Legolas by True Colours reviews
“Alas, alas,” cried Legolas:“My quiver, it is missing! I must have lost it when I saw Strider and Arwen kissing!" Updated with Author's Note that I really need read! There will be acknowledgments for those who help me out.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,780 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 1/3/2009 - Published: 12/7/2008 - Legolas - Complete
A Very Mass Effect Christmas by R-I-C-A-R-D reviews
It's Christmas Eve on the Citadel and an extremely unenthused Shepard is dragged off to sing Christmas carols by Chief Williams. Will the Commander embrace the spirit of the occasion?
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,400 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 5 - Published: 12/18/2008 - Complete
Mass Effect: The Choices We Make by R-I-C-A-R-D reviews
A fanfic attempting to reveal the thoughts, feelings and motivations Shepard may have had regarding certain plot points during the campaign - I wanted to try to 'get inside' Shepard's head and explore why and how certain choices were made.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,637 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/12/2008 - Complete
Mass Effect: Old Soldiers by R-I-C-A-R-D reviews
Twenty years after the defeat of Sovereign, Shepard is forced out of retirement when a criminal group threatens the one closest to her.
Mass Effect - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 10,831 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/4/2008 - Complete
Forgiven by Jax Solo reviews
She's an exiled Mandalorian, Jedi, and infamous general. He's a scoundrel with a dark past but a heart of polished gold. Their fates are tied together in more ways that one. Can she forgive him...before it's too late for the Force? LSFE/Atton.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 55 - Words: 129,048 - Reviews: 245 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 12/4/2008 - Published: 10/8/2006 - Complete
The Gift of Change by CatsbytheGreat reviews
Father Christmas has a conversation with the Pevensies when he visits them during their first Christmas at Cair Paravel.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: K+ - English - Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,671 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 8 - Published: 11/26/2008 - Father Christmas, Lucy Pevensie - Complete
Chuck and Sarah Watch a Porno by Sophisticated.Simplicity reviews
I have never, never seen a woman do that with her body." Chuck and Sarah watch some porn-- for God and their country, of course .
Chuck - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 993 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/15/2008 - Sarah W., Chuck B. - Complete
Identity Thieves of the Old Republic by Kendoka Girl reviews
Someone gets ripped off. Hee hee hee.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Parody/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,249 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 10/26/2008 - Published: 5/14/2006 - Complete
An Honor? by Cylka reviews
Shepard and Alenko will finally get to spend some time together away from the Normandy. Now finished. Please R&R. I'd love to hear what you think.
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,872 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 10/22/2008 - Published: 10/8/2008 - Complete
Mass Effect: Elevation by R-I-C-A-R-D reviews
A series of scenes mostly revolving around the many and long elevator rides in Mass Effect.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,508 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 13 - Published: 10/2/2008 - Complete
Why are Humans Smarter than Quarians? by Wraithfighter reviews
It's a horrible, offensive, speciest and specious joke. But, as Commander Shepard will soon realize, the tiny bit of truth behind it can, in fact, be hilarious. One-shot, no romance, just a bad joke that's left the writer giggling like a schoolgirl...
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,282 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/19/2008 - Complete
Dreams by Auralee reviews
A little random LSFRevan/Carth fluff I came up with after playing KOTOR1: Aliana Calion has an unusual dream. Rated for language. My 1st KOTOR fic. ONESHOT!
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,483 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/27/2008 - Carth O., Revan - Complete
Ten Songs by Illucian reviews
A song can set a mood and cue a memory. Movieverse: Ten musically-inspired ficlets about Tony and Pepper.
Ironman - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,072 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/25/2008 - Complete
Persephone by Arae Arca reviews
The Alliance thought their secret shame was dead and gone. However, Cerberus' experiments are only just beginning. Post-game. OCs, with some familiar faces.
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 9 - Words: 8,424 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 8/19/2008 - Published: 5/23/2008
Of Cotton Swabs and Infirmary Floors by bronzeraven reviews
Oneshot, written from prompt: 'Q-tips smell funny.' Mal can't find any band-aids in the infirmary, but he does find a small white box.
Firefly - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 471 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Published: 8/7/2008 - Mal, Inara - Complete
Iunctio by sinvraal reviews
Explorations, variations and off-camera moments from the main storyline. Shenko, multiple character POVs.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 25 - Words: 61,185 - Reviews: 246 - Favs: 339 - Follows: 76 - Updated: 7/29/2008 - Published: 4/22/2008 - Complete
All in a Day's Work by impsy reviews
Or, "Five injuries Shepard suffered through and one she didn't." The development of Shepard and Kaidan's relationship shown through Shepard getting wounded. Oneshot; spoilers for entire game; Shenko.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,846 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 7 - Published: 7/25/2008 - Complete
All Joking Aside by The Fico reviews
A Shepard and Joker story. Why can't the pilot get some love?
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 24,950 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 7/11/2008 - Published: 4/5/2008 - Shepard (F), Joker - Complete
Hollywood by chocolatemooses reviews
Just plain silliness. "Hmmm. An Iron Man movie." Tony continued reading. "Who the hell is Robert Downey Jr.?"
Ironman - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 743 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 9 - Published: 7/11/2008 - A. E. Stark/Tony, V. Potts/Pepper - Complete
The Prince of Egypt: REEEMIX! by roxypony reviews
Undergoing renovations. I'm actually gonna make it not-retarded this year. Thanks for the great reviews, more than I expected! Haters can suck it.
Prince of Egypt - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 601 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/9/2008
The Correspondence of the Fellowship by TheLeef reviews
When the members of the Fellowship get separated in The Two Towers, what would they say if they wrote to each other?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,670 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/29/2008 - Complete
Reflecting by Minty-Nutmeg reviews
Kaidan and Shepard have a small talk after Virmire. Can Kaidan handle talking to her without making a fool of himself? Short and sweet fluffiness. A Shenko fanfic. Oneshot.
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 852 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/12/2008 - Shepard (F), Kaidan A. - Complete
Good Taste by JustShotMarvin reviews
He doesn't understand what the big deal is about this 'pizza' stuff. -Slight GarrusxFem!Shep, if you squint.-
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 830 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 12 - Published: 5/21/2008 - Complete
Tears on a Sleepless Night by Lilliwyn reviews
After the loss of a friend, Kaidan helps Shepard sort through her grief over a midnight snack. Shenko! Please read and review!
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,219 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/29/2008 - Kaidan A., Shepard (F) - Complete
Oblivious by impsy reviews
Or "I Only Have Eyes For You." As the Normandy approaches Ilos, Liara, Garrus, and Joker muse about their feelings for Shepard. Oneshot. Spoilers for whole game. Onesided Liara x FemShep, Garrus x FemShep, and Joker x FemShep; overall Kaidan x FemShep.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,367 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/23/2008 - Complete
Rivendell International Airport by Primsong reviews
A bit of humor considering what might have happened if the Fellowship had decided to take a plane instead of walking all that ways - would Anduril make it through security?
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,638 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 121 - Follows: 13 - Published: 3/1/2008 - Legolas, Gandalf - Complete
Wabbajack by AngelOfGeeks reviews
Why quietness at Cloud Ruler Temple is never a good thing.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,024 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 15 - Published: 2/23/2008 - Complete
Tracers by Uilleand reviews
Because I know what a migraine really feels like. Kaidan oneshot.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,024 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/27/2008 - Shepard (F), Kaidan A. - Complete
Boromir and the No Good, Very Bad Day by Hosanna reviews
I went to sleep with my dagger at my side, and now there's a scratch on my arm, and when I got out of bed this morning I tripped on my bow... Boromir tells of his terrible, horrible day, in which no one understands him... except for Mother.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 795 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 20 - Published: 12/23/2007 - Boromir, Denethor - Complete
Gossip by impsy reviews
Joker has an important role in making sure the secrets of the Normandy's crew are protected. Unfortunately, he accomplishes it by listening in on all of them.
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,313 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 11 - Published: 12/10/2007 - Complete
Thinking Too Much by impsy reviews
One shot, Shenko, spoilers Virmire and beyond, full summary inside.
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,432 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/3/2007 - Complete
Strange, Stranger and Downright Unsettling by Abbeygirl1 reviews
After a fall, Mal's world changes dramatically.
Firefly - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,332 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 11/21/2007 - Published: 11/12/2007 - Mal - Complete
The Secret Journal of Hieronymus Lex by JawsOfOblivion reviews
An insight into the private life of everyone's favourite pompous goofball, Hieronymus Lex. Find out about his heroic deeds in the Imperial City, his lovelife, and his vendetta against the Gray Fox all in this exclusive extract from his own journal!
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K - English - Humor/Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,937 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/2/2007 - Complete
The Lover's Curse by amonitrate reviews
It all started because Kaylee was in love. Hijinks ensue. KayleeSimon, WashZoe, hint of MalInara.
Firefly - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,085 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 10/28/2007 - Published: 10/21/2007 - Zoe W., Kaylee - Complete
Jayne's Turn by starry-oblivion reviews
Jayne attempts to cook dinner. Chaos ensues.
Firefly - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,816 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 9 - Published: 8/19/2007 - Complete
The Quest for a Coat by FebruarySong reviews
When Frodo horribly tears his coat, the Fellowship is forced to enter the deep darkness of...the local mall. There they face fangirls, coatracks, and other angsty evils. Oneshot.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,230 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/17/2007 - Complete
You Know You're Obsessed When by WanderingPirate reviews
Is there anyone left that isn't sick of lists that mock the movies and books we all love? I guess we'll all find out by seeing how many people click on this...You know you want to.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 946 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 9 - Published: 7/7/2007 - Complete
The Council of Pippin by Earendilion reviews
What would have happened if Elrond was late for his own council? Something disastrous, no doubt. Nominated for 2007 MC Awards.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,334 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/9/2007 - Complete
Hogan Takes a Holiday by L J Groundwater reviews
Complete. If he was commanding the 504th Bomb Group, he'd get a furlough. But what does Hogan do when he needs to get away from a POW camp? The answer affects more than just the Colonel himself. Please read and review.
Hogan's Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 35,319 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 12/10/2006 - Published: 8/4/2006 - R. Hogan, R. Crittendon - Complete
There's a Wampa Ice Creature in my Fridge by DWH reviews
The heater on the Ebon Hawk is broken, and people are cold. Except for Carth, apparently. An ode to my house's heater. :P
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 711 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/23/2006 - Complete
Who Stole Heinrich Oaken Hull's Family Jewels? by M'aiq the Liar reviews
M'aiq answers the question of what happened the night someone stole the Nordic sailor's family jewels.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,448 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Published: 9/10/2006 - Complete
The Lusty Argonian Maid by M'aiq the Liar reviews
M'aiq presents The Lusty Argonian Maid. The Khajiit writes in the previous parts to that provocative and cheesy, yet surprisingly popular, love play found in shady bookshelves throughout Cyrodiil. Originally written by Crassius Curio.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 686 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/13/2006 - Complete
Arwen's Vision by Galenfea reviews
Remember Arwen's vision from RotK? What if it had continued a bit further and shown something she did not want to see: the kid's mother? AU, Movieverse, rating for a bit of language. NB: not supposed to be true to Tolkien in any way, shape or form.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 376 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 6 - Published: 6/9/2006 - Arwen U. - Complete
Daughter by BookWorm37 reviews
This is 'Count of Monte Cristo' BOOK BASED! Children can change the heart so much. Oneshot. Be kind, please, and reviews are always welcome. COMPLETE
Alexandre Dumas - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 281 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 8 - Published: 3/15/2006 - Complete
Superray Eowyn and Faramir by Nina aka The Author reviews
Peter Jackson messed up with not showing us enough EowynFaramir scenes, so I have taken the liberty to take my Superray gun and fix that little error.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,297 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/7/2006 - Eowyn, Faramir - Complete
What I Like About by The Green Pilgrim reviews
The Fellowship members are all at each other's throats when Pippin suggests a game that forces them to say nice things about each other...
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,510 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/27/2006 - Boromir - Complete
Pink Banthas by Lady Revan reviews
SW: KOTOR: Sometime during the events of KOTOR, HK47 begins acting strangely, and Revan has to figure out why... and how to get him back to normal.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,373 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/25/2006 - Complete
The Fords of Isen by LadyBranwyn reviews
Do the bonds of friendship endure beyond the grave? A Rohirric ghost story, written for annmarwalk's birthday.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,438 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/21/2005 - Boromir - Complete
CAPTAIN MALCOLM REYNOLDS: User's Guide and Manual by lalaithien reviews
The evil technical advisor returns! In honor of Serenity the company presents yet another entirely twisted User's Guide, this time to everyone's favourite Manly and Impulsive Browncoat, because he is So...Very...Pretty. PG for mild innuendo.
Firefly - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,369 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 30 - Published: 9/21/2005 - Mal
Revenge of the Writters by DWH reviews
Revan recieves the script for KOTOR 3, and her worst fears are confirmed: that her worst fears aren't nearly as bad as reality...
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,061 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/24/2005
Upstaged by Amateurs by DWH reviews
The real reason why KOTOR 2 wasn't complete as sold to the general public...
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,581 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/22/2005 - Complete
MarySue Dies by Cheez Socks reviews
This is just a short little oneshot inspired by all of those long, drawnout, dramatic MarySue death scenes.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 541 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/5/2005 - Complete
OBI WAN KENOBI Owner's Guide and Manual by lalaithien reviews
The Owner's Guide goes Geek! Includes handy tips and specifications for the highly-anticipated OBI-WAN unit, Mk II. With thanks to Theresa Green. :)
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,556 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/1/2005 - Obi-Wan K.
BOROMIR Owner's Guide and Manual by lalaithien reviews
The Owner's Guide series continues! Technical specs and handy user tips for the BOROMIR unit - slashfree. With thanks to and permission from the brilliant Theresa Green. :)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,968 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/28/2005 - Boromir
The Secret Diary of Boromir of Gondor by lalaithien reviews
At last, another entry in my secret diary series. Had to upload it again to get the pagination to work right. Nothing nasty, just good fun. Enjoy!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 642 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/1/2003 - Boromir
Boromir's Sorrow by lalaithien reviews
The meeting with Galadriel from Boromir's perspective - drawing from both the book and the film.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,040 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/23/2002
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LEGACY reviews
Being a billionaire's daughter has its perks. But when your dad AND your aunt are superheroes? Then it gets weird-and everybody expects you to be the same. Movieverse. Does not include IM3. Tie-in to Jax Solo's IRON BONDS. Andy belongs to JS, and Toni belongs to me.
Ironman - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,859 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 5/3/2013 - Published: 4/21/2013 - A. E. Stark/Tony, V. Potts/Pepper
Regret reviews
After the events of DA2, Lady Hawke finds herself regretting her decision to side with the Templars and keep Sebastian at her side. Warning-much angst and sorrow compressed in few words.
Dragon Age - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 567 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Published: 5/22/2011 - Hawke (M), Anders - Complete
Martin and the Terrible Very Bad Day
Parody of "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day." Used Hosanna's version with Boromir as a model. Young Martin Septim has an awful day! Features Oblivion AU. Parody. Please enjoy! I hope you laugh!
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 993 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/12/2011 - Martin S. - Complete
LAURELS reviews
A collection of vignettes of the Nerevarine's adventures when she visits Cyrodiil and gets involved with the Oblivion Crisis. One-shots probably aren't chronological. IN-PROGRESS. R&R please!
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 24,094 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 5/12/2011 - Published: 6/8/2009 - Martin S.
The Epic Oblivion Alternate Ending reviews
Ever notice how main characters typically recover from a mortal wound or death within five minutes? "I got better!" they say. Except... in Oblivion. That is... UNTIL NOW. Note: It's parody, all right? So laugh. Here, have a sense of humor.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 675 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 9 - Published: 6/8/2009 - Martin S. - Complete
Glitches in Oblivion reviews
We should be grateful that real life doesn't function the way it does in the game... or should we? Martin and the Heroine of Kvatch learn this the hard way.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 305 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 23 - Published: 6/8/2009 - Martin S. - Complete
PROJECT DELILAH reviews
With the Flock still "on the loose," the Director of Itex has concocted a new plan of attack against them. Set approx. 4 years after STWAOES. Project Delilah, AKA Del, belongs to me; everything else to James Patterson. COMPLETED! Please R&R.
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 34 - Words: 158,814 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 3/30/2009 - Published: 2/28/2008 - Complete
Mass Effect: That Mysterious Beat reviews
Mysterious noises on Normandy prompt Lt. Cmdr. Phoenix Shepard to investigate!
Mass Effect - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 959 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 6 - Published: 12/8/2008 - Complete
KOTOR 2: SACRIFICE reviews
Sometimes jealousy and vengeance come with a high price-tag. LSF Exile; DS Atton. Rated T for language and suggestive stuff. R & R, please.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,224 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Published: 10/25/2008 - Complete
Mass Effect: FIVE MINUTES reviews
Shepard and Kaidan have a minute of snuggle-time before Ilos. Shenko one-shot. Pure fluff.
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 838 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 18 - Published: 9/21/2008 - Complete
Mass Effect: CRY reviews
Shepard mourns Toombs' death. Shenko. Two strong insults; otherwise clean.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,202 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/27/2008 - Complete
KotOR: DARK DAY reviews
It's just a routine day, a routine mission, a routine mine. But things go horribly, horribly wrong... Lire Dakaar's personality belongs to me. The rest to LucasArts and BioWare. Completed.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 13 - Words: 40,883 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 7/2/2008 - Published: 5/10/2008 - Complete
A Tale of Two Cuties reviews
Animosity grows between Carth and Atton because of a woman. Parody. This is not meant to be taken seriously. Try to find it humorous if you can. All of this mess belongs to LucasArts, none to me. Yay.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,635 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/8/2008 - Complete
JORAD reviews
Rogue Fett returns for one more adventure in this sequel to Memory and Fett'ad. I OWN NOTHING except Rogue!
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 27 - Words: 108,516 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 5/10/2008 - Published: 11/17/2007 - Boba Fett - Complete
FINDING HAWK reviews
Revan's daughter embarks on a journey of selfdiscovery upon learning of her mother's past. KotOR AU. Hawk and all characters not depicted in either game belong to me, Tatooine92.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 46 - Words: 77,470 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 3/8/2008 - Published: 1/8/2008 - Complete
MEMORY reviews
In this sequel to Fett'ad, Rogue's adventures continue. I OWN NOTHING except Rogue.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 69,428 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/16/2007 - Published: 10/2/2007 - Boba Fett - Complete
FETT'AD reviews
A girl is raised by Jango Fett, eventually becoming a bounty hunter herself and falling in love with an ARC trainee. AU. I own nothing except Rogue. All other OCs belong to JaxSolo, used with permission.
Star Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 84,327 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 9/26/2007 - Published: 8/27/2007 - Jango Fett, Boba Fett - Complete
Parenthood reviews
Delta Squad is faced with an unlikely assignment when they find a little girl and must learn the finer tricks of parenting. I do not own them LucasArts and Karen Traviss do. Completely AU and written for simple entertainment.
Star Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 9 - Words: 7,134 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/27/2007 - Complete