escape artists
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Joined 04-28-07, id: 1266539, Profile Updated: 04-09-08
Author has written 2 stories for Artemis Fowl.

some things you should know about me...

Pen Name: escape artists (only plural 'cause the the singular was taken).

Series I like/read:

Twilight, Artemis Fowl, Harry Potter, Series of Unfortunate Events, Warriors, The Tales of Rowan Hood, Fablehaven, Maximum Ride and many more that I can't think of now/don't have time to name...

Authors that rock:

Jerri Spinnelli, Neal Shusterman, Eoin Colfer, Erin Hunter, Clay Morgan, C.S. Lewis, Lemony Snicket, James Patterson. and lots more...

favorite book (for now)

Animal Farm (sorry I don't remember who it's by).

I write fanfiction for:

Artemis Fowl, nothing else...

Pairings I support:

Artemis Fowl:


Harry Potter:



Danny Pantom:


Tucker/Valerie is Ok, sort of.



The Uglies


Maximum Ride

Max/Fang- awesomeness!

Nudge Iggy- I am not crazy about it, but oh, well.

Plus a few others that I forget as soon as I finish the book.

Pairings that should be trampled by a heard of wild zebra:

Slash Pairings

Artemis Fowl:




Harry Potter:



Bella/Jacob the whole point of the book is that she loves EDWARD, or well close. If she didn't, there wouldn't be a story.

The Uglies,


Stories I have written/am writing

Artemis Fowl and the Mask- always waiting for reviews, but I've recieved a lot lately, so I'm happy.

Coming Eventually:

For A Dancer- oneshot songfic, I've got it up on the internet, but it needs some serious tweaking... let's just say I wrote it at a sleepover at about 2:00 in the morning so it isn't my best work.

Kryptonite- Oneshot, Songfic, and AH, song by three doors down, already written, I'll post it after AFATM is finished.

An Artemis Fowl Christmas Carol- POSTPONED... I have been working ona few other projects... and with school... I might finish it, I might not... as much as I'd like to, I can't seem to find the time.

probably a threeshot you know past, presant, yet to come. already written, I'm waiting for Christmas time. AH duh, I can sort of give you a cast. remember, I've never read the book, only seen a Christmas Carol play three times and watched the muppets version a million times (I can quote the entire thing).

Ebineezer Scrooge- Artemis Fowl

GO Jacob Marley- Julius Root

GO Christmas past- Mulch Diggums

GO Christmas presant- Domovoi Butler

GO Christmas YTC- ??

Belle- Holly Short

the other characters from the books are in there, and I think some of the other CC charachters are there too, but I am not telling.


This is Bunny. Copy and paste this bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have cookies.)

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, so weird is good because unique is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your butt off.

If you think that those stupid kids should just give that poor Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (i find that i am a very tough opponent). So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile. (except I'm not crazy, I'm INSANE!)


The Princess Diaries

The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all

In some movie

no one gets out of life alive

At the end of KH2:

Sora and Riku are sitting on a beach, a bottle washes up on the shore with a message in it.

Riku: (opens bottle, takes out note, reads note. turns to sora) Sora... I think it's for you.

Me being stupd

Me(trying to make conversation with mom): what colors do cars come in? Mom: Lots of colors. (rapidly) but that's stupid I don't want to talk about that.

Conversation w/ my brother about polotics...

John: Now I see that your stupid, so I will have to restate everything I say to you.

John: ...


Me: Aren't you going to restate everything now?

John: No, I have nothing more to say to you...

Me: But restating what you said would not be saying anything more to me.

John: What??

Me: By saying the same thing to me again, you would not be saying anything more, just restating what you've already said...

John: Now you're just confusing yourself.

Me: No I am not. I am just restating everything I say to you because you are too stupid.

Announcements at my school

Yesterday is money already spent, tomorrow is a promisary note, today is the only cash you've got... spend it wisely.

that is all for now I guess...

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The World From My Porch by Linxcat reviews
Dill has returned to Maycomb after nine years. Scout already has someone chasing her. Will she choose Dill, her childhood love, who still makes her go weak at the knees, and move to New York, or will she choose her dashing, rich, suitor?
To Kill a Mockingbird - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 12,238 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 106 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 3/31/2008 - Published: 12/27/2007 - Complete
We Are by Princess Tyler Briefs reviews
Ben reflects on Riley and family on a not so lazy Sunday afternoon. [BenAbby and BenRileybrotherly fluff]
National Treasure - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,464 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 9 - Published: 11/17/2007 - Complete
When Life Is Lemony by Maran Zelde reviews
Is one of the Baudelaire parents alive? Where are the Quagmire triplets? What's in the sugar bowl? Lemony discovers the answers to these questions and more. [Oneshot]
Series Of Unfortunate Events - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,872 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 8 - Published: 10/11/2007 - Lemony S., VFD - Complete
The Stars Dancing in her Eyes by Xx Artemis Rox mi Sox xX reviews
The Orionids danced in the sky that night. But he wasn't watching. He was watching her, the light of his dark and lonesome night... AH
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,155 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/1/2007 - Complete
English Room 3 by Ciiirce reviews
Ignatius Borlock, or Ig, moved to England four years ago. He is a tough guys, one of a gang, until he meets Miss Caraway. The English teacher helps him to become himself again but could it be possible that his father and his teacher have met before...?
Stargirl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,822 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 9/29/2007 - Published: 6/12/2007
Hold Up by save changes to normal reviews
All they wanted was a couple of cheeseburgers. But with Ben and Riley, is it ever that simple?
National Treasure - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,490 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 159 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 9/19/2007 - Published: 8/28/2007 - Complete
The Taming Of Cerberus by Ms. Marla reviews
How far would you go to save the one you love most? Would you lay down your life? Or maybe your freedom? In any case, some people are just not worth letting go. [AH]
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,301 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 9/15/2007 - Published: 8/19/2007 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
Kryptonite by Ms. Marla reviews
Every superpower comes with a weakness. Every weakness is different. [AH]
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,935 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/26/2007 - Holly S., Artemis F. - Complete
Artemis Fowl: Somewhere In Between by toranspitfire reviews
A boy genius, an elf, a dwarf, a pro wrestler and a centaur all walk into a bar... Artemis, Holly and Mulch have been gallivanting around town in an ignorant bliss, but now something evil is coming. Is it a new foe, or one they had thought long defeated?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 26,182 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 8/18/2007 - Published: 2/12/2006 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
Fragile Cliche by XxTotallyObsessedxX reviews
Love is a war. War is a game. And Artemis Fowl knows how to play. [AH? Sure, why not. If not, then you can insert the characters of your choice] R&R, please.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 432 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/1/2007 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
Legend, Alive by Ms. Marla reviews
Something thought to be only of nightmares has turned up, and is much too real. Only Holly and Artemis can save the world...again. But is their new connection a gift? Or a burden?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 28 - Words: 29,669 - Reviews: 151 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 7/17/2007 - Published: 6/18/2007 - Complete
11:30 at the Ancient Oak by XxEviexX reviews
What happens when Holly and Artemis agree to meet at that special oak tree? Will anything...happen? TLC spoilers AH
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,073 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 9 - Published: 5/18/2007 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
Artemis Fowl : The Wedding Documents by Aquarico reviews
When Holly Short is charged for a crime she did not commit she is forced to marry to clear her name. The only problem is that her husband to be is a nineteen year old Mud Boy with marriage plans of his own. AH
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 19,011 - Reviews: 167 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 5/7/2007 - Published: 1/28/2007 - Artemis F., Holly S.
Now or Never by hollybridgetpeppermint reviews
When human and fairy admit love For one another, Then, and only then, will the Destroyer stop destroying, Then will the spell be broken, And few will remember what has transpired.” AH, rating for some violence
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 37,559 - Reviews: 264 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 4/6/2007 - Published: 3/19/2006 - Artemis F., Holly S.
ArtemisHolly thing by hollybridgetpeppermint reviews
This one has no official title, but no number either, so it's just ArtemisHolly thing right now. Artemis and Holly older now, don't worry get married. There is one more part of this coming, but I'm not the one writing it, so I don't know when I'll have i
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,723 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 7 - Published: 3/17/2006 - Artemis F., Holly S.
Wintergreen by Evilism reviews
Welcome to the Cliches Compendium. I've covered everything, from Mary Sues to Crossovers. Rated for outrageously mushy, tragic and cliched scenes.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 8 - Words: 16,878 - Reviews: 201 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 9/13/2005 - Published: 5/11/2004
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Artemis Fowl: A Christmas Carol reviews
Four years after the Opal deception, My version Of the Christmas Carol with Artemis Fowl playing Scrooge AH fourshot? sorry it's late for Christmas.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Parody/Supernatural - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,973 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 1/3/2008 - Published: 12/31/2007 - Artemis F.
Artemis Fowl and the Mask reviews
3 years after TLC. Ark Sool is trying to take over the world. Artemis & friends, have to save the world. but Artemis' emotional mask is deteriorating, and he is discovering emotions that he did not know he had AH rated for safety.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 23 - Words: 24,410 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 10/24/2007 - Published: 5/4/2007 - Complete