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Joined 04-28-07, id: 1266557, Profile Updated: 06-30-08
Author has written 2 stories for Jake 2.0.

I love stories. I love to read them from books, I love to listen to books on tape and I love reading the fan fiction here. When I was little my sisters asked me to tell them bedtime stories. It was part of being the older sister and I enjoyed it. In elementary school I told stories for “Show and Tell” and discovered I could make other kids laugh. My first big written story was for a ninth grade class assignment. It was fun to write, got laughs from my classmates and a good grade from the teacher. (And, contrary to my niece’s belief, I did not chisel it on a rock by the light of a cave fire!)

Other than the advertising copy I wrote to pay the rent, I haven’t written stories for a long time, but I thought I might start again. This site looks like a great place to begin, lots of nice company here. I am hoping to tap into the insight and advice of the writers and readers here to become a good story teller.

I have lived long enough to find out these things:

One: ‘What goes around, comes around’…Not necessarily

Two: ‘The meek will inherit the earth’…Not unless their lawyer is a pit-bull

Three: ‘If I’d known when I was younger that old bodies ache, regardless of previous good care, I’d have taken more chances when I was younger.

Hypothesis: The fastest way to a man's heart is through his stomach.

Conclusion: The fastest way to a man's heart is the fourth intercostal space between the ribs with force sufficient to penetrate three inches with whatever object you have in your hand.

Experiment Notes:

A TV remote control device requires more force than a kitchen knife, but less force than a Callaway driver--that object being more effective inserted into an orifice anyway. These findings have been confined to a single case study.

Attempts at repeated trials have failed as I am having difficulty obtaining further test subjects. Contrary to commonly held opinion, there are some things you can’t dare a drunk-off-his-ass college student to try, apparently. However, word of my experiment has spread to female relatives and has generated some interest in further clinical trials.

Bleed Into Me by Tiefling Zhai reviews
Lucy and Desmond try to dismantle Abstergo from the inside. However, their efforts are thwarted as they realize just how much of Altaïr bled into Desmond ... and Desmond bled into Altaïr.
Assassin's Creed - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,299 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 11/16/2008 - Published: 4/21/2008
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Plausible Deniability reviews
Plausible deniability. Despite sounding like something to avoid stepping into at a dog park everybody wants it, even Jake Foley.
Jake 2.0 - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,363 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 9/10/2008 - Published: 9/3/2007
Drop the Gun, Jake reviews
Those four words. Simple words. A command, a silent plea. But, what if they are said to a man on whom the world has turned it's back?
Jake 2.0 - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,954 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Published: 6/1/2008 - Complete
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