Hide my bio thing NOW if you don't like long profile bio thingys.

Don't worry, nobody's perfect... well, there was this one guy, but we killed him.

Hi! I'm the Little Cog Girl, I'm the Girl Genius equivalent to the little Match girl. (I should probably write a fan fic about that...)

Here is a link to Girl Genius the web comic. Its a good comic to start on if you don't usualy read comics. http:///

Another awesome web comic is Brat-Holla. http:///

I am dyslexic. I write for fun, but my spelling level is below 5th grade so spell check is not all that useful for me. I find it empowering to write what I want, spell phonetically, and post. I'm not interested in correcting my spelling. I'm just interested in writing what I want and sending it out into the world. You are not going to shame me, or change me, for doing something I find empowering. If you don't like what I write, and don't like how I spell, don't read what I post.

Height: Short

Eyes: Myopic

Hair: Dyed

Age: depends on your definition of "age".

Birthday: Too far away to be excited about too soon not to think about. (common people, don't you think its weird we have our friends celebrate the countdown to our death?? I mean, they've got to be plotting something...)

Location: Lets put it this way, I'm to the left. But which left it is I'm not telling you.

Brand New sparkling motto: Be nice to the pervie mined idiots. They out number the rest of the population 3 to 1 (Just look at our represation in the government).

I thought that I would like to post this here sence it's been ratteling around my head for such a long time...

Logic is boring.
What people need to use is anti logic. Or 'Carly' logic as my friends dubbed it.
In anti logic the Theory of Education it states that everyone is in a train for education. The better you do the higher class cars you get. The more education you have the farther up the train you are. The educators are the people who run the train. Within this system there are a select few who are not in the train but in a sail boat being pushed in front of the train.
In order for this to make sense you must know that it is the middle of winter. The people in the train have heaters and are quite comfortable thank you very much. The people in the boat are in life jackets and swimsuits and are waiting for it to rain. They are content to wait for the rain and have so far refused all hats and scarves offered.
Following so far? Good, because it's about to get complicated.
So the train goes on. In this little hypothetical world of the Ed. train it has never been spring (or any other season for that matter) only winter.
The people on the boat are insain arn't they? Waiting for it to rain and not getting in the train!
Eventually the train will go over a large bridge spanig between a cliff face and a mountan and over a vast lake that's fed by a underground river with a trecherous current for swimmers. In the middle of the brige their is a large bump. The train being unable to sworve hits the bump and falls over the edge tugging the boat with it. By the time the boat and the train hit the water all the people on the train are terrified. Their trying to escape the sinking train or climb onto the boat and not succeding or their the smarter ones with philisophic training and are swiming over to the shore of the lake wondering about the workings of the univerce and if they should have payed more attecnchen to Dugles Adems.
The people on the boat by contrast are quite happy. They always said that their boat would come in handy. It's also just started raining (January requierd the train to be on the track in this little hypothetical world to keep it's grip on the weather. April was elected by the other mounths to take over and brought it's showers with it) and a brisk wind has started up tword shor.
There for what this means is that if you ever meet someone who doesn't seem to be doing anything remotly usefull in school it's just because their in the boat and your on the train and you should get a life jacket on and get up front in the boat alredy.
Anyways it would make more sence than logic, or time for that matter. Time doesn't make much sence eather. I'll think up some thing for time using antilogic sometime soon. (I think I've had too much Terry Prachett resently. I'm over my quota for this month...)

This is a poam my Grandpa made me memerize-

Two dead men got up to fight,

One was blind and the other couldn’t see,

A zombie jumped up and said “I’ll be refery!”

They fased each other back to back,

Drew their sords and shot each other,

A deaf poleceman heard the noice,

And came and killed thouse two dead boys.

This is another version-

"One Fine Day In The Middle of the Night"

One fine day in the middle of the night,
Two dead boys got up to fight,
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other,
One was blind and the other couldn't, see
So they chose a dummy for a referee.
A blind man went to see fair play,
A dumb man went to shout "hooray!"
A paralysed donkey passing by,
Kicked the blind man in the eye,
Knocked him through a nine inch wall,
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all,
A deaf policeman heard the noise,
And came to arrest the two dead boys,
If you don't believe this story’s true,
Ask the blind man he saw it too!

Here's a link to find out more- http:///Onefineday.htm

Beawhere of the Woolwolfs!! There what your socks turn into at night, they howl when washed, and they're the reson your socks go missing. It's because when Woolwolfs fight they end up eating the loser but if they can't digest each other they end up hacking each other up behind the washer. Bewhare the Woolwolfs!!

Fave stuff...

Anything pro Russell/Sherlock. I don’t mind Sherlock/Watson slash (pre-Russell, Doyal Cannon, or Sherlock)

Fruits Basket (Kyo/Touru, Yun-Yun/Machie, etc. but out of book couples are usualy realy funny)

I Love Stephanie Plum! (pro Ranger but I don't hate Joe)

Twilight and sequels out and coming (I hate any out of book crosses (that arn't crack of course)... and I started reading fan fiction and found this site because of this sears). I'm now old enough to realize how embarrassing this admittance is. Unfortunately post 50 Shades of Gray I guess Twihards are useful for getting bondage erotica out there! Even their shitty versions of it...

Princess Princess! (T/Y!)

Ouran Hich School Host Club (I love Tamma-chan/Kyoya and I don't mind any other pairs except when they break up Hunni/Mori)

Maximum Ride ROCKS!! :flips out: (I like Fang/Max so far. Haven't read much fan fic yet though...)

Discworld IS THE BEST SEARIES EVER!! .:is not just saying that:. (even though I haven't finished it yet or started on the fan fic.)

LotR!! (Frodo/Sam Pippin/Merry!!)

Good Omens!! (!!)

Fave quot to be updated whenever...

Fav. quote(s):

"..." The best line in the world.

"Yam!!" The second best line in the world.

01-11-11-11-1(for Ashly of the Tuesday Next Books)

I'm thinking of letting my charecter Pink run around in the public view. Although I'm not sure I want to pay the property damage...

My Favorite series include-

(books) The LofR, the Stephanie Plum Series, The Artumas Fowl Series. I also enjoy the work of Philip Polmen, Darth Nix, And of course anything by Jasper FFord, Stardust is cool too! I love Fruits Basket! and Moonlight Meow and 11th Cat, Lorie R. Kings Marry Russell searies, The Meloncoly of Suzumia Haruhi, Harry Poter, Down the Rabbit Hole and sequils, Almost all Diana Wynne Johns especily Howls Moving Castle and all the Chrstomancie books with Cat, Fruits Basket, Bleach, Ouran High School Host Club, Girl Genious, Anonci Boys, The Barumaus Trilogy, Wizards, The Push Cart War, Princess Princess, His Dark Materials Trilogy, the Sherlock Holmes short story's, Falling Up, Vampire Knight, The Hitch Hikers Gide to the Galexy, The Princess Bride(witch I would have wrote if the auther of it hadn't beat me to it...) The Tooth Fairy, Vampire Loves, almost everyting I've read, etc., etc.

(movies) I LOVE the Pirates Movies! When I was in 3ed grade I loved the first movie sooooo much I watched it (or the extra DVD) every day after school for half a year... The other half of a year I watched the second Harry Potter DVD (or extra disk).

(TV) House, Sherlock, Bones, Spy, Doctor Who, Castle, Psych, Mongrels, Suits, The Glades, Rookie Blue, Warehouse 13, 30 Rock, Scandal, Revenge... In no particulare order.

He glanced up sharply when Holly entered through the pneumatic double doors. “Anybody see you come in here?” Holly thought about it. “The FBI, CIA, NSA, DEA, MI6. Oh, and the EIB.” Foaly frowned. “The EIB?” “Everyone in the building.” Holly smirked. --Artemis Fowl, page 42

To Whoever- IF the EIB saw you rading this you can send my minischule army of miny-mamoths, villigers with pichforks, villigers with rotten veggies and chebi people after the organization.

I looovvveee black! Who could not like the color black? Exept if I you like green... I like green! Hmmmm, green or black? (chebie face scrunched up in consintration trying to deside...)

Usagi, Mechi, Mechi, Usagi!

I LOVE TO PASTE AND COPIE THINGS! (I'm so addicted that I actualy forget that I've alredy pasted and copied something and past and copie it again...)

1.If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

2.If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

3.If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

4.If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

5.If you've ever read started to read a chapter in a fanfiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile.

6.For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (I find that I am a very tough opponent). So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

7.A true friend is someone who will try to answer the "eraser bits" question and have a long conversation about it. A friend is someone who wont say anything when you cry for no reason, but will start sobbing to, just help you cry. If you have a true friend, copy and paste this in your profile.

8.If you go to File insted of Edit rutenly copie and past theis into your profile

9.Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929,SweetNCrazieSugarmuffin,The Komodo Dragon Phoenix,Bust_A_Groover, Tecna, Novemberscorpion110388, WriterGirl3000, tietum,dragon of spirits, Himano, Phantomofthebasket, The Little Cog Girl

10.Homophobia and You: They're people too! Stop the hate and spread the love!

11.If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

12. 98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.

13.If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

14.If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

15.If you've ever copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

16.If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

17.If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

18.Beware the Ides of March, ye fools. Copy this into your profile, or I will slice through thy neck like a machete through a banana.

19.If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.

20.I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy this into your profile!

21.If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

22.If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!

23.If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

24.If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

25.If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

26.If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

27.If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile

best friend is insane! If you agree, or if you have an insane friend, then copy this to your profile.

29.If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.

30.Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song, Ba Ba Black Sheep, and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.

31.If you've ever wondered if you were adopted because of your sibling, copy this into your profile.

32.If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

33.If you have 5 or more imaginary boyfriends put this on your profile.

34.If you have ever had a crush on a fictional character, copy and paste this on your profile and add your penname and the name(s) of the characters you have crushed on: The Little Cog Girl;Gill! Sherlock Hound The anime carictore HE IS A DIFERNT PERSON THAN THE BOOK CARICTORE, who doesnt like Joe and Ranger and Yuki and Kyo and Artimus and Cat and Howl and Gur-kun and Chibie-suke and, and, and, ohhhhh the're just soooooooo many...

35.If you think that those stupid kids should just give that poor Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile.

36. 92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breath. Copy this into your profile if you'd be part of the 8 percent laughing your ass off.

37.If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

38.If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

39.Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

40.If you're stalking a fictional character copy this to your profile. (who could resist going after some of them?)

41.If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile

42. I'm bored... Their aren't any intergliatic space ships to hich a ride on and my cats won't tell me where they hid their death ray. If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

43.If you can read this message, you are LITERET.

44.Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, watching-waiting-wishing, 100-percent-Harry-Potter-obsessed, iluvdavidwright45, dianeandnumairareahotcouple,windsoftiti, Ilovethelittletacos...Ilovethemgood, i-have-issues-deal-with-it, Ninja of the Flames, Spuffy is a -gasp- XemoX, Kiki Lelsissia, The Little Cog Girl

45.If you think Daisy should burn in HellClan, copy&paste this in your profile.

46.If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy & paste this into your profile.

47.If you love rain, copy & paste this into your profile.

48.If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, then copy & paste this into your profile.

49.If you know an anime character who should be real, then copy & paste into your profile.

50.If you have a mad laughing fit for no reason, then copy & paste this into your profile.

51.If you have ever read ANY Girl Genious copie and past this into your profile

52.If you LLLLLLLOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVEEEEEE fics where they do randum things to the caricters cut and past this into your profile

53.If you have ADD, ADHD, Dyslexia or some other thing like that and are proud of it copie and past this into your profile

54.If you forgot what you were just about to do copie and past this into your profile.

55.If you have ever axidentily copied and pasted something twice copie and past this.

56.If you are bord of reading this profile cpie and past this into your profile...

57. Pay No Mind To Those Who Talk Behind Ur Back Because It Means that Your 2 Steps Ahead...

58.Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.

59.hyper = me...

60.

(V)

(O.o)

( l )

This is an Usagi

61.

(V)

O.o

( l )

This is Usa-chan.

Help Usa-chan and the Usagi take over the web by putting them into all of your prophiles! K?

62. If someone has autism, this can mean:

Their brain works differently than others'. They don't understand facial expressions and emotions, and have a hard time showingtheir own emotions. Other people’s emotions confuse and upset them.

They have some trouble understanding language and instruction...sometimes we have to talk to them like they are younger than they are. They often seem not to be listening to us when we talk to them.

Everything stresses them out (trying to look at people’s eyes, changes in routine and schedule, doing unfamiliar activities) and so they try to stop the stress by trying to be in control of EVERYTHING and EVERYONE around them. Sometimes they might seem rude or bad, but they are really just struggling to understand things around them.

Eventheir own family can have trouble helping them sometimes, but you can help by:

--talking to them using a calm voice

--not making fun of them or teasing them

--realizing that people do their best to help him be calm and do well

--making sure you have their attention before you tell them something

Some of the symptoms or effects of autism can be:

--normal teaching methods don't work

--inappropriate laughing and giggling

--crying or tantrum

--acts as if s/he is deaf

--no fear of real dangers

--is upset by changes in routine or other things

--spins objects or own body

--extreme distress for no known reason

--sustained odd play

--has trouble playing with peers

--not cuddly; might resist touch

--little or no eye contact

--seems standoffish

--inappropriate attachment to objects

--may have trouble understanding language

--sometimes seems overactive, sometimes overly quiet

Copy this into your profile if you know someone with autism, or if you just want to spread the awareness.

63.

If you can read this message, you are literet:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile! (I'm dyslexic and I didn't realise that it was spelled oddly untell I sow the "If your could read that..." thing at the botom and had to re-read it to see what was weird about it... And then I had to read if backwords 'cause rereading didn't help...)

64. PLEASE READ WHAT'S UNDER THIS!!

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight throuth the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital bacause they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken awat from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a come for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rest a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do part to end it.

65. if at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

66.93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen,Laby Anne Boleyn, Wild Shadows, Darkangelkyo101, The Little Cog Girl

67. If you are obsessed with fan fiction copy this into your profile

68. If you ever had a crush on one of your friends copy this into your profile!

69. IF YOU IGNORE THIS WITHOUT READING IT YOU HAVE NO HEART...BUT IF YOU FIND YOU CANNOT STOP UNTIL YOU REACH THE END THEN YOU MUST HAVE A VERY BIG HEART.

Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school
He told his friends that it was cool
And when he pulled the trigger back
It shot with a great crack
Mummy I was a good girl
I did what I was told
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold
But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye
I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry
When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another
And all because he got the gun from his older brother
Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much
And please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush
And tell my little sister that she is the only one now
And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best
Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest
Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class
And never to forget this and please don't let this pass
Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this
Mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss
And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try
I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry
Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest
But mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest
Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack
Mummy listen to me if you would
I wanted to go to college
I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with daddy
On that trip to the new zoo
I wanted to get married
I wanted to have a kid
I wanted to be an actress
Mummy I wanted to live
But mummy I must go now
The time is getting late
Mummy tell my Chris
I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date
I love you mummy I always have
I know you know it's true
Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you"
In memory of the Columbian students that were lost
Please if you would
Pass this around
I'd be happy if you could
Don't smash this on the ground
If you pass this on
Maybe people will cry
Just keep this in heart
For the people that didn't get to say "goodbye"

I would have pasted and copied this entire site into my prophile but then I realsised that would be a wast of time so here's the link to click http:///society/.

I fell off the wagon... hears the PALINDROME I just had to copy from the link above...

Palindrome written by Dan Hoey with a LISP program

A man, a plan, a caret, a ban, a myriad, a sum, a lac, a liar,
a hoop, a pint, a catalpa, a gas, an oil, a bird, a yell, a vat,
a caw, a pax, a wag, a tax, a nay, a ram, a cap, a yam, a gay,
a tsar, a wall, a car, a luger, a ward, a bin, a woman, a vassal,
a wolf, a tuna, a nit, a pall, a fret, a watt, a bay, a daub,
a tan, a cab, a datum, a gall, a hat, a fag, a zap, a say, a jaw,
a lay, a wet, a gallop, a tug, a trot, a trap, a tram, a torr,
a caper, a top, a tonk, a toll, a ball, a fair, a sax, a minim,
a tenor, a bass, a passer, a capital, a rut, an amen, a ted,
a cabal, a tang, a sun, an ass, a maw, a sag, a jam, a dam, a sub,
a salt, an axon, a sail, an ad, a wadi, a radian, a room, a rood,
a rip, a tad, a pariah, a revel, a reel, a reed, a pool, a plug,
a pin, a peek, a parabola, a dog, a pat, a cud, a nu, a fan, a pal,
a rum, a nod, an eta, a lag, an eel, a batik, a mug, a mot, a nap,
a maxim, a mood, a leek, a grub, a gob, a gel, a drab, a citadel,
a total, a cedar, a tap, a gag, a rat, a manor, a bar, a gal,
a cola, a pap, a yaw, a tab, a raj, a gab, a nag, a pagan, a bag,
a jar, a bat, a way, a papa, a local, a gar, a baron, a mat, a rag,
a gap, a tar, a decal, a tot, a led, a tic, a bard, a leg, a bog,
a burg, a keel, a doom, a mix, a map, an atom, a gum, a kit,
a baleen, a gala, a ten, a don, a mural, a pan, a faun, a ducat,
a pagoda, a lob, a rap, a keep, a nip, a gulp, a loop, a deer,
a leer, a lever, a hair, a pad, a tapir, a door, a moor, an aid,
a raid, a wad, an alias, an ox, an atlas, a bus, a madam, a jag,
a saw, a mass, an anus, a gnat, a lab, a cadet, an em, a natural,
a tip, a caress, a pass, a baronet, a minimax, a sari, a fall,
a ballot, a knot, a pot, a rep, a carrot, a mart, a part, a tort,
a gut, a poll, a gateway, a law, a jay, a sap, a zag, a fat,
a hall, a gamut, a dab, a can, a tabu, a day, a batt, a waterfall,
a patina, a nut, a flow, a lass, a van, a mow, a nib, a draw,
a regular, a call, a war, a stay, a gam, a yap, a cam, a ray,
an ax, a tag, a wax, a paw, a cat, a valley, a drib, a lion,
a saga, a plat, a catnip, a pooh, a rail, a calamus, a dairyman,
a bater, a canal--Panama.

Copie&paste Artie Bird book quots: (taken from Hyperhollybrigetpepermint)

"Stay back, human. You don't know what you're dealing with." --Captain Holly Short (Artemis Fowl, page 74)

"Spit out the prisoner." --LEP (Lower Elements Police) Officer (Artemis Fowl, page 167)

"Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist and that I am not a gibbering moron." --Artemis Fowl, pae 64

"Seven and a half hours to save the world. Isn't there some law that says we get at least twenty-four?" --Captain Holly Short (Artemis Fowl: The Opal Deception)

Put this in your profile if your trying to be an Author(ess).

Unknown Speaker-

You're only young once; you can be immature for ever.

Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.

Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.

Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.

When life give you lemons, make apple juice then laugh as everyone tries to figure out what the hell you did.

PEANUTBUTTER: duct tape of food.

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

WARNING: keep out of children. (translation on Korien Knife box)

Anyone who says "Easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried it.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

SHIN - A device for finding furniture in the dark.

FOOT: The other device for finding furniture in the dark.

HEALTH: The slowest possible rate of dying.

LIFE: The slowest possible rate of dying.

DEATH: The slowest possible rate of living.

SUSHI: Known to the rest of the world as 'Bait'.

KARAOKE: A Japanese word meaning tone deaf.

PHILOSOPHY: A study that lets us be unhappy more intelligently.

SLEEP: A poor substitute for caffeine.

SLEEP: That fleeting moment just before the alarm goes off.

I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.

This would be really funny if it weren't happening to me.

Everything is possible, except skiing through revolving doors.

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.

Most people learn by observation, and there are the few who learn by experimentation. And then there are those who actually TOUCH the fire to see if it's really hot.

I just found a dark humer site. Does it show?

Inscription on a tombstone:
"I TOLD YOU I WAS SICK" Seen in Ashland, New Hampshire

You all know about the Darwin Awards -- It's an annual honor given to the person who did the gene pool the biggest service by killing themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid way. Last year's winner was the fellow who was killed by a Coke machine which toppled over on top of him while he was attempting to tip a free soda out of it. (viset the Darwin awords!! They ROCK!! http:///

All extremists should be taken out and shot.

The greatest lies of all time:

I love you

This won't hurt a bit

The check is in the mail

I was just going to call you

We have a really challenging assignment for you

I'm from the government, and I'm here to help you

Of course I took the garbage out

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - moving on from lies...

Obviously the only rational solution to your problem is suicide

The quickest way to a man's heart is not through the stomach but through his chest, with an axe.

The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlamp of an oncoming train.

Blow your mind -- smoke gunpowder.

Keep Sweden tidy, shoot a tourist.

Never hit a man with glasses. The blow torch will work just fine.

We, the unwilling,
led by the unknowing,
are doing the impossible
for the ungrateful.
We have done so much,
for so long,
with so little,
we are now qualified to do anything
with nothing. (Ahhhhh... It's the GOVERMENT!! RUN!! FAST!! NOW!! Unless you want to dye...)

Do you think sheep know when you're pulling the wool over their eyes?

Schizophrenia beats being alone.

Excuse me, I have to recharge my flamethrower.

I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.

Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie!" ...until you can find a rock.

What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull.

Old MacDonald had an agricultural real estate tax abatement.

Today is the last day of your life so far.

I'd insult you, but you're not bright enough to notice.

"You don't have to be mad to work here, but it helps." Graffiti

"We are the people our parents warned us about."
Graffiti

"For those who think life's a joke - just think of the punch line!"
Graffiti

"The meek shall inherit the Earth - they're too weak to refuse."
Graffiti

"Death is the greatest kick of all. That's why they save it for last."
Graffiti

"Cancer cures smoking."

Graffiti

"Sky-diving: good till the last drop."
Graffiti (Rosovelt was the first person to use the slogan "Good to the last drop" to endorce Maxwell House Coffee)

"There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another which states that this has already happened."

Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's
Guide to the Galaxy"

"For thousands more years the mighty ships tore across the empty wastes of space and finally dived screaming on to the first planet they came across--which happened to be the Earth -- where due to a terrible miscalculation of scale the entire battle fleet was accidentally swallowed by a small dog"

Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's
Guide to the Galaxy"

In an atomic war, all men will be cremated equal.

DROP THE SCYTHE, AND TURN AROUND SLOWLY.

If rabbits feet are so lucky, what happened to the rabbit?

"Let's just say that if complete and utter chaos were lightning, he'd be the sort to stand on a mountain in a thunderstorm wearing wet copper armor and shouting 'All gods are bastards'."

"The Color of Magic"

Terry Pratchett

If you want your name spelt wrong, die.

Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.

Don't Panic. The Earth is just being demolished for a hyperspace bypass.
The Hitchhiker's
Guide to the Galaxy

"The story so far:

In the beginning the Universe was created.

This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move."

Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"

I'll never get off this planet.

"You know the oxygen masks on airplanes ? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams."
Rita Rudner

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it."
George Bernard Shaw

I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face."

I said, "You'll be sorry."

He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?"

I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."
Emo Philips

One student fell into a cycle of classes, studying, working and sleeping. Didn't realize how long he had neglected writing home until he received the following note: "Dear Son, Your mother and I enjoyed your last letter. Of course, we were much younger then, and more impressionable. Love, Dad."

"The brakes were useless, the car was wandering. The rear end was coming around. I jammed it down into Low, but it made no difference so I straightened it out and braced for a serious impact, a crash that would probably kill me.

"My heart was full of joy as I took the first hit, which was oddly soft and painless. No real shock at all...

Yes. These huge white lumps were not boulders. They were sheep."
Hunter S. Thompson

Warning: Do not drink the battery acid. It doesn't taste good and will hurt you. Also do not bite the tires, especially while the bike is moving.

Our lawyers made us put these warnings in.
An Australian motorcycle manual

A lot of people I know believe in positive thinking, and so do I. I believe everything positively stinks.
Lew Col

When you are in it up to your ears, keep your mouth shut.

"You are a fluke of the universe... You have no right to be here. Whether you can hear it or not, the universe is laughing behind your back."
National Lampoon, "Deteriorata"

"If we do happen to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do?"
"Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 feet in the air and scatter oneself over a wide area."
Somewhere in No Man's Land, BA4

Life is a sexually transmitted disease, and it's 100 fatal.

Why keep sane in a sick world?
Graffiti, N ckstr msgatan, Stockholm

Mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to extinction. Let us pray we choose correctly.
Woody Allen

"Son, I just want you to know: life is a black, sucking, vortex of anguish and despair, filled with brief moments of false hope and empty joy, all the while dragging you inevitably closer to final, absolute, and eternal death."
"thanks dad.."

"...A life that is clean, a heart that is true, And doing your best, that's success."
Clifford Olson, semifinalist in
the 1995 North American Open Poetry Contest.
Disqualified upon finding that in 1982 he was
convicted of killing eleven children.

"Don't close your eyes for the crash; you'll miss the best part"
Bruce MacInnes, Skip Barber
Driving School instructor

"We live in cheap an twisted times.
Our leaders are low-rent Fascists and our laws are a tangle of mockeries. Recent polls indicate that the only people who feel optimistic about the future are first-year law students who expect to get rich by haggling over the ruins... and they are probably right."
Hunter S. Thompson, "Songs Of The Doomed"

Order is for idiots, genius can handle chaos

The question is not if you are paranoid, it is if you are paranoid enough

Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you recognize a mistake when you make it again.
F. P. Jones

I either want less corruption, or more chance to participate in it.
Ashleigh Brilliant

I'm not in denial I'm just selective about the reality I choose to accept
Calvin and Hobbes

Among modern occupations, only cult leaders and TV weathermen rival the technological visionary's ability to retain credibility despite all evidence to the contrary."
Nathan Myhrvold

He who knows and knows that he knows is a master.
He who knows and does not know that he knows needs a teacher.
He who does not know and knows that he does not know, needs love.
He who thinks he knows and does not know, is lost.
Ancient proverb

A critic is a legless man who teaches running.

Solution to two of the worlds major problems: Feed the homeless to the hungry...

1. Get a LOT of explosives. The more the better.
2. Hook up a detonator to an altimeter. Set it for 100-200 feet. That will give you good dispersion.
3. Mix Vaseline and gasoline in a bucket.
4. Find a really tall building. Something like the World Trade Center is perfect and is in a sufficiently crowded area to generate the proper sized crowd.
5. Get an extra large trench coat, ski mask, duct tape and a lighter.
6. Bring your materials to the top of your building. Liberally apply the Vaseline-gasoline mixture to your entire body. Duct tape the explosives around your legs, arms, head and torso. The more you use the better. You cannot overdo this. Attach the altimeter to the explosives.
7. Put on the trench coat and mask so that the explosives are not visible.
8. Start ranting and throwing things so that you are sure to attract notice. Drag this part out as long as possible. Say anything that comes to mind but try to stay away from real problems. Your love life DOES NOT make for a good sound bite. Ask for news cameras from the major networks. Pace around a lot while waving your arms.
9. DO NOT let on that you have explosives on your body. The police will clear the area and you definitely don't want that.
10. When you've gotten the crowd to a fevered pitch, when the helicopters are hovering like vultures, whip off the jacket and set yourself on fire.
Wait until you are completely engulfed in flame then jump.
Try to steer yourself towards the crowd. That way flaming falling body parts will pelt the fleeing onlookers when you explode.

Congratulations! You've just made history.
Cool Ways to Kill Yourself (Difficulty level 7)

From an actual newspaper contest where entrants age 4 to 15 were asked to imitate "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey":
My young brother asked me what happens after we die. I told him we get buried under a bunch of dirt and worms eat our bodies. I guess I should have told him the truth -- that most of us go to Hell and burn eternally -- but I didn't want to upset him.
Age 10

By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.

The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983.

Discharge status: Alive but without permission. The patient will need disposition, and therefore we will get Dr. Blank to dispose of him.

The patient refused an autopsy.

The patient has no past history of suicides.

She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December.

Patient's journals

According to the 2000 year old Mayan prophecies, the world will end on the 21st of December 2012 (the winter solstice). This is the date where the very sophisticated Mayan calendar ends and the human race will perish. Earth will rebel against mankind which have turned arrogant, ignoring the holy values and disturbing the balance of nature.
Historical facts

Up to 30 times more people are buried in the earth than presently living.

It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail.
Gore Vidal

Life is pain. Anybody that tells you differently is selling something.
William Goldman, "The princess bride"

"Veni Vidi Exii - I came, I saw, I Left!"

Chuck Eby

If a turtle loses his shell is he naked or homeless.
Jameson Forney

If voting could change something, it would be illegal.
Graffiti on a Montreal building

Earth First! We'll strip mine the other planets later.
Bumpersticker

Love is a perky little elf dancing a merry little jig and then, suddenly, he turns on you with a miniature machine gun.
Matt Groening, creator of the Simpsons

My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.
Steven Wright

Magic embodies the concept of lying turned into an art form.
Teller of Penn & Teller

When we remember that we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
Mark Twain

Smile. Tomorrow's going to be worse.
Frost

The secret to life is that there is no secret at all and you don't get your money back.
Faith Hill Country Music Song

Boy Scout: Kid dressed like an idiot led by an idiot who's dressed like a kid.
Devils Dictionary

A rebel with a cause is a hero; a rebel without one is stupid.
Jason Wells

Without this great land of ours, we would all drown.
Professor Irwin Corey (comedian)

Once I tried to kill myself with bungee cord. I kept almost dying.
Stephen Wright

Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere is the fact that none of it has tried to contact us.
Calvin & Hobbes

Open-minded people must accept the possibility that being closed-minded is better. Close-minded people can take comfort in knowing that they are right.
Steve W.

"Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups."

If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error.
John Kenneth Galbraith, printed in Money magazine the week after JFK Jr.'s death

Save a tree... Eat a beaver

It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters whether I win or lose.

Laura, a good friend of mine, pointed out to me recently that half of humanity has an IQ of less than 100. Facts like that tend to draw things into sharp focus quickly. Keep it in mind. (mail and thank him)
Harvey Rowe

Mmm... caffeine pills. The midnight snack of champions.
Hawkeye Pierce

History repeats itself. It has to, no-one listens.

I choose to live forever, or die trying too.
CrabulaS

The worst part of winning a rat race is not that you win, but the fact that you're still a rat.

Evil spelled backward is live

Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but so would an 80lbs. carrot.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day, teach a man to fish and he will spend all day in a boat drinking beer.

Jury: Twelve people who determine which client has the better lawyer.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Just when you think you've hit rock bottom, someone goes and throws you a shovel.

The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

Some people are alive only because it is illegal to kill them.

The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

If necessity is the mother of invention. Then laziness must be the father.
Troy D. Bryan

PESSIMISM: Every dark cloud has its silver lining, but lightning kills hundreds of people each year who are trying to find it.
T. Shirt

PESSIMISM: Every dark cloud has its silver lining, but lightning kills hundreds of people each year who are trying to find it.

If you're arguing with an idiot make sure he isn't doing the same thing.

A man being admitted into a mental institution: "They called me mad. I called them mad. And them they outvoted me."

This planet is obviously being used as an insane asylum by other planets.
George Bernard Shaw

Remember, it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4 to pull the trigger of a decent sniper rifle. -

I was walking down the street when this man hammering on his roof called me a paranoid little freak... In Morse code.
Emo Phillips

The reason attempted suicide is illegal: The government can't tax you if you're dead.

The best way of dealing with the insane is to pretend that you are sane
Hospital Charge Nurse

I remember reading that scientists once believed the universe was made of hydrogen, because it was the most plentiful ingredient found. If that theory holds any truth, then I believe it to be made of stupidity.
Frank Zappa

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
Mark Twain

Due to management cuts, the light at the end of the tunnel will now be switched off.
Graffiti

Realism is just an excuse for pessimism.
Rebecca Schoen

Friends come, and friends go, but enemies accumulate. Illuminati

It's not America I have the problem with, it's the Americans.

PHILOSOPHY, n. A path of many roads leading from nothing to nowhere. Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

The game of life has three rules:

1. You can't win.

2. You can't break even.

3. You can't get out of the game.

Always borrow money from pessimists, they never will expect it back.

What color does a smurf turn when you strangle it?

If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax? Gregory Santo

When asked how old he was "Old enough to know better, but young enough to not give a damn anyway." Jarvis Black

If you wont more of the above pessimistic quotes go to http:///entertainment/coolquotes/cool_quotes.htm

"'The idea of having an empire is that occasionally, other people do things for you!'

'I know that. But there are some things only I can do.'

'Like what?'

'Like fight a war.'

'YOU ARE A TERRIBLE PATIENT!'"

Girl Genious (Or However You Spell That...) From Klaus in his walking hospital bed to his doctor, Sun Jen-djieh.

“Oh, don’t worry about me, Adults don’t need to eat. You see, children, when you grow up, your body creates food for you, but the only catch is, you need to be in the sun.”

Shiggie-san from Chap. 53 of OffBalance by RollingOffHeads

"Imagining yourself dead is the cheapest sleaziest and most satisfying form of self-pity." -Don Delillo.

"It's not that I want to kill her, it's just I don't want her to live anymore"

"'There you are, then. I knew the two of you would get along like a house on fire.' Screams, flames, people running to safety..."

I just want to tell you that MeGoobie former beta person and Hiperhollybrigerpepermint number one fave auther and loretta537 thank you for all the revews! and RandomnessUnleashed curent beta person are rrrrreeeeellllllllyyyyyyy good authers... they rock!

Hey look! You finished reading my profile to the end! You must be relay patient... Even I haven't read the whole thing through! (It was written in short segments over LOTS of time and then the rest was pasted and copied from... every where it was copied from...)

If I offend you or anger you or do anything elce along those lines pleas just tell me. I think so differently from convention that I need people to be blunt. Seriously, I might not notice that I did something wrong. So don't be afraid of being rude, I'm too thick headed to notice.

I have REVIEWS! My story's have been been favereted! I think all my writing is horrible (it was all done in 10 minnints or less...) and people actualy read it! Tank You all of you who bother to read any of what I have writen! I'm amazed that you botherd!

Its been two years now sence I've had this acount. I'm still not bord with it... Thats inpressive... And just look at how long my prophile is!

(\_/)
=(0.0)=
(")_(")

I was bored and copied and pasted my prophile into a word document... it's currently 27 pages...

And the prophile-biothingiy GOWWWWWWS (mawahahahahahah ha ha :cakelingcontinues:)

This is a REALY GOOD IDEA!!

ALL FRUBA FANS SHOULD COPIE THIS!! (taken off of Kyki- The Late Night Writer's prophile... Sorry...)

A Furuba Version of this

Number your 12 fave Furuba characters (In no order) and answer the questions!!

1. Shigure

2. Kyo

3. Hatori

4. Uo

5. Hana

6. Manabe

7. Hiro

8. Kyoko

9. Kazuma

10. Haru

11. Akito

12. Tohru

1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fanfic before?

Manabe/Akito... I dunno... Probably not... but maybe I should write some as a crack fic...

2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?

Maybe not Hot but difinetly cool. WAY COOL Uo rocks.

3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?

Ummm... Eight was pregnant with twelve... So... Um... Ja...

4) Do you recall any fics about Nine?

Ja!! The milk sean!!

5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?

Kyo/Manabe?? Hell no but it would be a freaking halarious crack fic!!

6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten?

Five and Nine. But five and ten would work as long a Haru was always black. Hana has a thing for black.

7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?

.:laughing:. He wouldn't be able to do anything but wach and be horified. Even his sharp tung wouldn't be able to say anything. Poor Hiro... Always walking in on things he shouldn't. Someone should teach him to nock on doors before he enters.

8) Make up a summary of a Three/Ten Fanfic.

Docter and pationt. Snow meats split personality pashen. Pain meets pain. Crack. Rated M for a reson people. HaruxHatori. Yaoi

9) Is there any such thing as a One/Eight fluff?

No, but I could write some 'bout them getting drunk together.

10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort fic.

Smart Ass To Dumb Ass, Do You Copie?

11) What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to de-flower One?

Street flower meats dog boy. Dog boy doesn't know about it. Street flower likes dogs so she doesn't give a damn and its all OK.

12) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?

Um... You ask them. I dunno.

13) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?

Again, I dunno. You ask them. It would be funny to read.

14) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five ?

Kyo/Uo/Hana?? God... .:starts laughting at thought:. Maybe I can get rebelliousangel94 to.

15) What might ten scream at a moment of great passion?

RIN!!

16) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?

Not Dead Yet by The Weepies

17) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?

Warning: M for your safty 'cause this is more crack fic then was ever intended to be taken by a human in one sitting. Shigure/Manabe/Tohru

18) What might be a good pick-up line for Ten to use on Two?

I dunno... I think it would be more along the lines of picking up eachother to through in a fight than actualy saying anything... Or maybe stoping the others wedding (I have a fic like that on my fave thingy. The Shreck head thing was a nice tuch)... Not much speeking for them.

Do not meddle in the affairs of slash writers, for you are cute, and would look good with another guy! -- signature on a long-dead forum. --I found somewhere and pasted and copied.

I love Macs. I hate PCs. If you agree copy and past.

Sometimes he would scribble something on a sheet of paper by his side. It was covered in symbols only eight other people in the world would have been able to comprehend; two of them had won Nobel prizes, and one of the other six dribbled a lot and wasn't allowed anything sharp because of what he might do with it.--Pratchett and Gaiman, about Aziraphale's mathematical skills in Good Omens.

"Fangirls like you are rising into positions of power. I fear for the future."
--my friend George-- from the bottom of Confessional by Niteshayde copied just 'cause I liked it.

Haven't messed with this lately. I got too busy with other things. Its a funny thought to think people actually look at what I've writen... (not verry often, but occationaly according to my traffic counter). Its been at least three years... Thats a long time to maintane a prophile... I wonder how long the pursen with the oldest active account has been on here?

Copie and paist if you can't spell due to dyslexai too.

Its going on year four or five... I'm a lot older. I read less fan fic... :( It is sad, depressing state to be in.

I do forensics/debate. Copy and paste if you do too.

Wow, its been about 6 years.

Thinking about it, I think I have had this account over 7 years...