Ginormous Funtastic Everything
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Joined 06-06-07, id: 1294604, Profile Updated: 06-29-10
Author has written 2 stories for Twilight.

Name: Caty Jo

Live: a little hick town somewhere in Northern America.

Age: 16

Gender: Female

Height: 5 even

Eye color: mostly green.

Hair color: Very light blonde.

Schooling: 12th.

Classes: Summer vacation!!

Sexual Orientation: Straight

Personality: ... however you interpret it I guess... I'm usually described as random, hyperactive, annoying, obnoxious, short, bitchy, mean, fun, loud, wierd, creepy, dangerous, and diabolical, . in my own world sorta thing... but also fun, cute, charming, abstract, a blast, and stupendous...

Loves: Kent, Ramen, Anime, Manga, Hot Asians boys, Hot Austrailian boys, reading, beta-ing, fights, being lazy and having a good time with my friends. pandas, and foxes. :D

Dislikes: Whores, Jocks, Preps, loud noises, southern accents(super sorry if that offends you! I have traumatic memories of my cousins from Mississippi) , sunlight, fresh air(I can't help it, I think it stinks...) and MANY other things...


I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had.
I wish they could adopt me.
I am not one of the lucky ones.
I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school.
It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the Realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised.
The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the woman who died when the EMT s stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn't have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. I am the person ashamed to tell my own friends I'm a lesbian, because they constantly make fun of them.
I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men wanted to "teach me a lesson"

Controversial Issues:
1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.
2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans...
Re-post this if you believe in legalizing gay marriage


1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that
hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy
behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has
legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed
at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites,
and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were
allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun
marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay
couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to
marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs
more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight
parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like
ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country.
That's why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model
at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents
to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could
never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to
cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans...

Copy this to your profile if you believe in legalizing gay marriage!

"i live in a small rural town in the middle of the U.S. and i watched as a two men were forced out of town when someone arsoned their house, i laughed when the arsonist was arrested.

i am one of the few that have seen true malicious hate towards homosexuals. Its really sad actually one person in town says "Oh that person is Homo" suddenly their house was torched and their lawn had "gay" burned into it.

the arsonist was a year younger than me...he was 14." - keaton dar on Gaia about homophobia.

Read this till the end till you pass judgement on me.

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.

I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.

I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.

I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.

I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.

My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.

I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.

I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!(Sort of an albino... I'm really pale...)
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.

I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.

I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.

I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST like to talk about crushes, dolls, not getting dirty, and parties.
I'm FEMALE, so I MUST have long hair.
I don't STUDY much but still get STRAIGHT A's, so I MUST be cheating
I an friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.

I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I ENJOY ANIME, so I MUST be a basement-dweller.
I like to READ, so I MUST do nothing except read.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems

are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree


getting HIGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was COOTIES?
'm 0 m' (was your hero)
and 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMIES were your siblings
and RACE ISSUES were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do

Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now

You're a 90's kid if:

You can finish this 'ice ice _'
You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, Bobby's World, Felix the cat, The Tick...AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!
You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"

You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."
You remember TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.

You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not
If you remember seeing hot tub bubbles make bubbly sounds before every music video on VH1.

when everything was settled by rock paper scissors..or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish...eeny meeny miney mo...and even better daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.
You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.

"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.
Captain Planet. He's a Hero.

You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together.
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.

You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.
You remember watching Home Alone 1, 2 , and 3 . . . and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"
You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.

You remember those Where's Waldo books.
You remember eating Warheads.
You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.
You remember Ring Pops.

You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.
If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"

When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.

Making those little paper cootie-catcher things, and then predicting your life with them.
You played and/or collected "Pogs"

You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere.
. . . Furbies
Saved By The Bell was the coolest show ever!
You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.
And Windows 95 was the best.
You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.

Michael Jordan was a king.
YIKES pencils and erasers were the stuff!

All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.
You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out.

You collected those Beanie Babies.
Mortal Kombat was awesome--the game and the movie

Gak was the coolest stuff invented.
Lambchop's song never ended.
The old dollar bills.
Silver dollars, which were cool to have.
You remember a time before the WB.

You collected all the Troll dolls
You had to read Weekly Reader's in class.

If you even know what an original walkman is.
You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.
You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
You know the Macarena by heart.

"Talk to the hand" . . . enough said
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it?!"
You remember trying to collect all 150 original pokemon cards but never could and if you did you thought you were all that!
You remember Highlight's magazine.
You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.
You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.
Before the MySpace frenzy . . .
Before the Internet & text messaging . . .
Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .
Before MIKE JONES . . .
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .
Before Spongebob . . .
Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was The new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs.
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off of our walkmans.
When gameboy was a brick.

You did MASH to figure out your future
When you weren't cool unless you had a Starter jacket.
Way back.

Before we realized all this would eventually disappear.
Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!!
Post this in your profile if you remember these days . . . .
or if you smiled at one of these things.

Hi, my name is Kazu. I like Writing and I like Athletics. I am running down the road I suddenly tripped over. I come home with a scatch on my knee. My mummy begins to worry. I tell her I am fine. She sighs and says ok. I am at school. When suddenly I fall and hit a tree. I am sent to the sickbay. Then I am sent home. Mummy takes me to the doctors. The doctors tell mummy something. Mummy starts to cry. I tell her it's ok. I'm not going to die. She tells me I am starting. Starting to be slower. I don't know what it means. But I have become sick. I tell mummy it's ok. I will become better. Mummy starts to cry. Do I have cancer? Mummy says no. Then what do I suppose. As a year had past. I struggle to walk. My speech is getting slower. It's hard for me to talk. My friends like to help me. My classmates like to run. But I have to sit down. And watch them have fun. Then one day my teacher. Comes to see mummy.Daddy comes out. And starts to get all snotty. The teacher tells my parents. I can no longer go to school.My motion is too slow. I ask the teacher slowly. I am sorry I am useless. I start to cry and beg her. I want to go to school. The teacher gives a smile. And tells me she is sorry. The school cant really help me. The words were so cruel. The day I had to leave. My friends and classmates cried. The boys upon the windows. Wave to me goodbye. I smile and sit in the car. I am taken to a school. A school with special people. Just like me and you. I start to have some fun. I made a lot of friends. As many years passed again. I talk too slow to understand. I cannot run anymore. And I struggle to even stand. I cannot write in my diary. My motion is too slow. Then one day I am sent. To the hospital again. Now many years have passed. I lie in a warm bed. I cannot move my body. I cannot move again. I talk very slowly. I cannot move my head. My mummy sits there crying. My daddy looks depressed. I ask my mummy sadly. Am I going to die. My mother holds my hand. Yells and starts to cry.

A few more years later.

I have to shut my eyes. I cannot talk or move. I seem to have died.

Copy and Paste this story about Kazu who was diagnosed with a rare uncurable disease, Spinocerebellar Degeneration, in your profile. This disease causes a failure of muscle control in their arms and legs, resulting in a lack of balance and coordination or a disturbance of gait. Support and send the message worldwide.

pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer.

Her name was Auroura
She was only five
This is what happened
When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic

Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair

She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound

Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endore

A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear
And softly crys
She loves her parents
But they want her to die

She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
"God, why? Why is
My life always sinking?"

Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did

Then one night
Her mom came home high
The poor child was hit and slapped
As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made

She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest,
" You deserve to die
You worthless pest! "

The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying

Police showed up
At the small little house
They quickly barged in
Everything was as quiet as a mouse

One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the sad little girl
Lying on the floor

It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms

Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!

Copy and paste this poem in your profiles if you are against child abuse:

My name is Sarah

I am but three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren't ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong

Or else I'm locked up

All the day long

When I awake I'm all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll get just

One whipping tonight

Don't make a sound!

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse

My name he calls

I press myself

Against the wall.

I try and hide

From his evil eyes

I'm so afraid now

I'm starting to cry.

He finds me weeping

He shouts ugly words,

He says its my fault

That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And I run for the door.

He's already locked it

And I start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream

But its now much too late

His face has been twisted

Into unimaginable hate.

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

Oh please God, have mercy!

Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door,

While I lay there motionless

Sprawled on the floor.

My name is Sarah

And I am but three,

Tonight my daddy,

Murdered me.

If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.

The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy,

it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are,

the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef,

but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?

Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile!


1. If you taken an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

2. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

3. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

4. If a pig loses its voice, is he disgruntled?

5. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

6. Why is the man who invests your money called a broker?

7. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?

8. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist when a race car driver is not called a racist?

9. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

10. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced "onety one"?

12. "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

13. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then shouldn't electricians be delighter, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models

deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

14. What hair color do they put on the driver's license of bald men?

15. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, and so I wonder if Chinese mothers use toothpicks?

16. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they put their pictures

on postage stamps so postmen can look for them when they deliver the mail?

17. Why don't you ever really learn to swear until you learn to drive?

18. Why doesn't anyone say "It's only a game" when their team is winning?

19. Last night I played a blank CD at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.

20. Ever wonder about those people who spend 3 on a bottle of Evian water? Try spelling "Evian" backwards...

21. Isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant about the same as having a peeing section in a pool?

22. If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea, does that mean that 1 person out of 5 enjoys it?

Glazed Over

A cop pulls over a guy.
"Your eyes are awfully red. Have you been drinking?"
"Gee, officer," the man says. "Your eyes are awfully glazed -- have you been eating doughnuts?"

The Living Statues

Two statues stood in a city park: one female and the other male. These statues faced each other for many years.

Early one morning, an angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you your greatest wish. I hereby give you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire."

And with that command, the statues came to life. The two statues smiled at each other, ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling, and twigs snapping.

After fifteen minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling.

Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, "You still have fifteen minutes. Would you like to continue?"

The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?"

Smiling, the female statue said, "Sure. But this time YOU hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on its head!"

Hung Like a Horse

There was a chicken and a horse playing together on a farm one day. The horse fell into a mud pit and yelled to the chicken to run to the house and get the farmer. The chicken ran to the house and the farmer was nowhere to be found. So, it got into the farmer's BMW and pulled the horse out with it.

The next day the chicken and the horse were playing on the farm again. This time the chicken fell into the mud pit and yelled to the horse to get help. So, the horse stood over the mud pit and told the chicken to grab on to his penis and he'd pull him out. The chicken grabbed on and, indeed, the horse pulled him out.

The moral of the story: If you're hung like a horse, you don't need a BMW to pick up chicks

I passed!!

You Know your obsessed with Naruto when . . .

-Live by a strict diet of only ramen.

-Dye your hair blond and try to walk up a tree.

-Call your semester exam a chuunin exam.

-Start using 'un', 'hn', and 'dattebayo' several times a conversation

-Trade in your favorite hat for a forehead protector.

-Roll your eyes back in your head and shout "Byakugan".

-Copy every thing a person does and claim it's your bloodline.

-Tell your friends about your dream to become Mizukage (believe it!)

-Stay up all night waiting for the release of the next manga chapter.

-Start adding the words chan and kun on the end of your friends' names.

-Paste a piece of paper that says "Icha-Icha paradise" on the front of adult books.

-Keep all your money in a frog shaped wallet.

-Memorize the 64 points of Ninpou.

-Stick your hand in a electric box and scream "Chidori" as you pass out.

-Start to call your teachers Sensei.

-Claim your going to kill your best friend so you can have a better Sharingan.

-Sit in your local book store and read the manga all day.

-When someone asks you who your dream girl is and you say Ino.

-Agree to stay up and write this list so you can be added to the staff of Naruto Central.

-Spend your week searching down Naruto sites.

-Refuse a date because you're saving yourself for Gaara.

-Graduate high school and proclaim yourself as an Anbu.

-Yell at Sasuke to poke Itachi's head and see how HE likes it.

-Tell your teacher that you didn't fail your test because you didn't study but because it was too troublesome

-Put a picture of Kakashi/Anko in your wallet and tell your friends it's your boy/girlfriend.

-List Anbu as current occupation on a job application.

-Can spout out a random character quote on command.

-Draw symbols on a scroll and try to seal a whole in a wall with it.

-Wake up in the middle of the night and scream "Itachi, why?!".

-Eat all day and all night, and then try to roll into a ball and run someone down.

-Get bit by a snake and decide stabbing the wound is a good idea.

-Draw a fanart for the fanfiction of a fanart just because you saw the word SasuNaru in it somewhere

-Read manga 24 hours non stop just so you can read more.

-Start referring to your crush as your 'Cherry Blossom of Eternal Youthfulness'

-Decide to call your moral code your "ninja way".

Fav pairings

For Naruto...

Naruto/Sasuke(they offset each other so perfectly)
Gaaraxnaruto (They are so perfect for each other! Its fantastic)
sasukexitachi (The Uchicest is the best!)
kakashixiruka ( They are just cute...)
kibaxshino ( I'm not sure where this pair came in...)
leexsakura ( Just because I can't see anyone else with lee or Sakura.)
shikimruxtemari ( They are so compadible 'How toublesome...-yawn-")

Ouran High School Host Club.
HikaruxKaoru (1 word... TWINCEST!! Its super cute!)
HunnyxMori (Its true, Hunny is the oldest...)
HaruhixTamaki (fdjaterjidklrgjeaiol)

that about it... I don't really complain about other couples that much...

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Crazy Cullen Chronicles by twilightnite reviews
The Cullens can be strange, but just how strange? Series of strange, stupid, random, and mainly funny stories, all coming out of the thing that's known as Kate's brain. Chapter 48: Sunday with the Pack. /Holy Moley, Kate updated! I thought she died!/
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 48 - Words: 56,717 - Reviews: 802 - Favs: 240 - Follows: 149 - Updated: 12/7/2011 - Published: 7/1/2007
How by theallpowerfullme reviews
Sasuke obsessing over Naruto's ass. sasunaru
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,342 - Reviews: 237 - Favs: 873 - Follows: 124 - Updated: 9/6/2010 - Published: 3/4/2008 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Happy with Edward by Amber Cullen reviews
This is a short fanfic about Bella and Edward. Be competly honest any advise is allways welcome. please read and review you wont be sorry.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 2,444 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 6/18/2010 - Published: 5/2/2007
Mythical Fusion by EdwardIsMyLover reviews
Bella is something special. She's known ever since she was 13, though she's never told anyone. What happens when she's sent to Forks and meets another mythical creature, a vampire, Edward.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 34,513 - Reviews: 1256 - Favs: 1,161 - Follows: 1,276 - Updated: 2/15/2010 - Published: 6/1/2007
To Admire the Sinful by Yellow kiwi reviews
Sequel to 'To adore the Hellish'. Will getting back together with Gaara only cause the same problems Naruto had to deal with in high school? Oh no, these problems are on a much bigger and public scale! GaaraNaru yaoi
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 82,318 - Reviews: 780 - Favs: 505 - Follows: 307 - Updated: 1/1/2010 - Published: 3/9/2008 - Gaara, Naruto U. - Complete
Gym Class Woes by Stella Ann reviews
Bella and Edward are in gym class together when they discover they will be going on a field trip where Bella will be armed. But with what? And what will this fatal day bring?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 12,165 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 111 - Follows: 132 - Updated: 12/31/2009 - Published: 3/28/2007
Stay Away by RebelAngel2011 reviews
Bella's a shy. She's friends with Angela and Rachael. Jessica & Lauren are Queen Bees. The Queen Bees get what they want and they want Edward and nobody else can have him. But then the Cullens start talking to Bella. What do Jessica and Lauren do. IM BACK
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 30,136 - Reviews: 599 - Favs: 258 - Follows: 284 - Updated: 11/4/2009 - Published: 7/7/2007
Never Again by TwilightsVampyre reviews
Edward left Bella...again. Now, 40 years later, Edward finds time to pop in and check up on Bella. Jacob says Bella's gone...for good. Oh goody! Edward's upset that she's gone, time to go upset the Volturi! But guess who part of the Volturi NOW...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 26,975 - Reviews: 383 - Favs: 268 - Follows: 298 - Updated: 7/20/2009 - Published: 5/24/2007
What Would the Neighbors Think? by Point of Reason reviews
What WOULD the neighbors think if they lived next to Bella? Just for fun, completely not serious. Still. Read and Review! Over 5,800 hits.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 8,065 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 4/17/2009 - Published: 6/19/2007
To Warm The Coldest Of Hearts by NaruSasuNaruLover reviews
Naruto is popular; Sasuke is a geek. They hate each other, but what happens with a make over, tutoring and a whole other side of the geek is shown? After all that is just at school. NaruSasu
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 26 - Words: 78,671 - Reviews: 554 - Favs: 472 - Follows: 209 - Updated: 4/9/2009 - Published: 2/3/2008 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Pranks! by Endless Dawn reviews
A random story including pranks, and your friends in the book, TWILIGHT.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 978 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 3/11/2009 - Published: 3/25/2007
The Village of Tenshi's by LisaJaneM reviews
Please read, not a chapter.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 147 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 3/11/2009 - Published: 3/16/2008 - Sasuke U., Naruto U.
Edward's Date Night Extravaganza by Skipper Pompeii reviews
During the summer between Twilight and New Moon Bella and Edward share many days and nights together. In these up coming chapters we explore the possible scenarios that might take place if Edward were to plan all the dates. Rated T for safety.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 18,019 - Reviews: 239 - Favs: 427 - Follows: 186 - Updated: 3/9/2009 - Published: 3/12/2007 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Angel and The Devil by NeonHemp reviews
On his first day at a new school, Gaara meets Naruto and gang. Later that day, Gaara talks to his on-line best friend. What will happen when Gaara discovers that he's been talking to the person he just met? GaaNaru
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 22,538 - Reviews: 145 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 79 - Updated: 1/25/2009 - Published: 4/26/2008 - Gaara, Naruto U.
Mute Return by Kara Hitame reviews
ChihiroxHaku Chihiro falls into a depression when her parents, schoolmates, and her brother abuse her and Haku has not shown up yet... full summary inside Much better than it sounds!
Spirited Away - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 10,388 - Reviews: 178 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 113 - Updated: 1/18/2009 - Published: 1/20/2007 - Chihiro O., Kohaku N. - Complete
Notes by Llama Mama23 reviews
Edward and Bella are caught passing notes in class. The teacher has the note read to the class. A series of embarassing events ensues, including Edward in a trunk, Bella in a gas mask, Carlisle as Tarazn, and Emmett with blue hair.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 25,990 - Reviews: 2874 - Favs: 2,063 - Follows: 979 - Updated: 12/29/2008 - Published: 5/14/2007 - Complete
Sprited Away 2 by Shessy Girl reviews
This is mostly a seguel to the movie. The promise between Haku and Chihiro comes true, when a 16 yearold Chihiro stumbles upon the Door to the Spirit World for the second time...
Spirited Away - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 22 - Words: 15,773 - Reviews: 395 - Favs: 251 - Follows: 216 - Updated: 12/14/2008 - Published: 2/11/2006 - Kohaku N., Chihiro O.
Nothing Wrong With Us by fowl68 reviews
Don’t treat me like I’m any better than you are.” “Yeah you are, teme. You saved me.” NasruSasu
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,095 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/24/2008 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Homework Break by TheUchihaRaven reviews
Naruto is bored while doing homework and decides to text his boyfriend Sasuke with unexpected results. NaruSasu
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,420 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 10 - Published: 10/20/2008 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
from hell to heaven by Porsche-Cash reviews
Gaara and his siblings run to Konoha boarding school to escape their abusive father and Gaara ends up with Naruto as his roomate. Needless to say cute yaoi/shonen-ai ensues. Yaoi/shonen-ai, AU, NaruGaa
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 12 - Words: 14,168 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 10/9/2008 - Published: 8/31/2008 - Gaara, Naruto U. - Complete
The Great Escape by Brittneys.Perspective reviews
Edward Is Trusted to Complete an Important Job for the Volturi, But It Wasn't Exactly In His Plans To Fall In Love With His Assignment CURRENTLY UNDERGOING EDITS.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 25 - Words: 46,130 - Reviews: 949 - Favs: 602 - Follows: 407 - Updated: 9/24/2008 - Published: 3/19/2007 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Stained Glass Windows by BlueBlood359 reviews
A sequal to The Seduction of Edward..... When Edward finally gives in will Bella finally get what she wants or will the road she's taken lead only to heart ache?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 53,597 - Reviews: 2191 - Favs: 1,053 - Follows: 671 - Updated: 9/22/2008 - Published: 7/19/2007 - Complete
The Seduction of Edward by BlueBlood359 reviews
Alice gets a vision about Bella that leaves Edward stunned. Will he get what he has secretly wanted. Or will he be too stubborn to do something for himself for once. But when Alice tells Bella of her vision, Bella becomes determined to make it happen.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 13 - Words: 27,903 - Reviews: 912 - Favs: 1,281 - Follows: 487 - Updated: 9/22/2008 - Published: 3/30/2007 - Complete
New Beginnings by Nigellica reviews
Team 7 is under cover as high school students. Under the careful supervision of Iruka and the... supervision of Kakashi. The team's very core is disrupted with Naruto suddenly Mr. Popular and the Ice Prince is left out in the cold. SasuNaru KakaIru
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 40 - Words: 69,265 - Reviews: 666 - Favs: 869 - Follows: 389 - Updated: 9/17/2008 - Published: 8/29/2007 - [Naruto U., Sasuke U.] [Iruka U., Kakashi H.] - Complete
Twilight Fanfiction Etiquette by Insanity's Partner reviews
Everything--And I mean EVERYTHING--there is to know about writing a Twilight fanfiction. I've got it down from Planning, to Summaries, to Grammar, to Other Characters, to Research...and even what to do when you get a writer's block! -Version 3.0-
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,792 - Reviews: 214 - Favs: 195 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 8/30/2008 - Published: 6/30/2007 - Complete
Self Tanner by Insanity's Partner reviews
I pivoted in the mirror, staring at my naked, orange body. Maybe this wasn't such a great idea, after all. [Edward ponders the effects of Self Tanner on a vampire.] [Oneshot]
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,458 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 8/30/2008 - Published: 4/22/2007 - Complete
Paradox by Insanity's Partner reviews
We were nothing more than a paradox. It was as if Life, Death and Fate were trying to keep us from ever being together, and pushing us at each other at the same time. BxE AU 1674
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 18 - Words: 30,447 - Reviews: 337 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 8/30/2008 - Published: 4/22/2007 - Bella, Edward
Blood Sugar by Insanity's Partner reviews
How do you get a vampire hyper? With blood sugar of course! [OneShot]
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,083 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 8/30/2008 - Published: 5/16/2007 - Complete
Absolutely Ghastly by Insanity's Partner reviews
I felt something at the back of my head, smoothly working the knot, and then tugging it off. Then the feel of his hands were gone, and the blindfold fell off. Then I saw three people I'd only previously seen on television. [Humorous two or three shot.]
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,311 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 8/30/2008 - Published: 7/2/2007
A Strange Encounter by Insanity's Partner reviews
Remember how on Stephenie Meyer's website she talked about the uncanny similarities she found when she visited Forks? Well, what if one of those similarities happened to be that she found two certain people in a certain meadow...? AU OOC Oneshot
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,441 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 8/30/2008 - Published: 4/30/2007 - Complete
Dead but Not Gone by Simply Emma reviews
AU: The wolves didn't do their job. Victoria found Bella, presenting her with a fate worse than death, forever alone. Bella has to learn to survive alone in a world she never thought she would face alone. Perhaps fate will intervene, perhaps not.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 43,829 - Reviews: 582 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 179 - Updated: 8/22/2008 - Published: 7/25/2007 - Complete
Oranges by Prism0467 reviews
Naruto opened the door to his small apartment, only to be hit with a very familiar scent. One-shot. NaruGaa AU Yaoi
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,526 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 22 - Published: 7/27/2008 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
Accidents Happen by reviews
Edward drinks from a human. He and Bella then get in a fight and he leaves her alone, with Victoria still on the loose. Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or New Moon. I've changed the summary.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 13 - Words: 15,997 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 7/19/2008 - Published: 7/8/2007 - Complete
How to Make Love: The Wonders of Wanking by Edlama reviews
Thanks to sharing a tent with Naruto, Gaara now knows what a 'boner' is... and promptly decides that he'd like to have one too. Will Naruto be able to overcome his embarrassement and help his friend? Warning: Fluffy Porn.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,683 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 256 - Follows: 37 - Published: 7/3/2008 - Gaara, Naruto U. - Complete
I Want You by holaliljazzy reviews
A silly arguement...Who wants who? What do they really want? More than one person's heart will be broken in this heartrenching story of love, unrequited.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,090 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 6/29/2008 - Published: 6/10/2007
xPapercut: by JaylenPanic reviews
Soubi is sick and is unable to tell Ritsuka.
Loveless - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,529 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 6/25/2008 - Published: 11/25/2007
A Question of Love by tsusami reviews
An interesting question pops up between the Jinchuuriki. Naruto is straight, right? One-shot. Naruto x Gaara
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,673 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 207 - Follows: 26 - Published: 6/17/2008 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
What Is Love? by shounenai4life reviews
Gaara wants to know what love is. Slash. Gaara/Naruto.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,440 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 5/24/2008 - Published: 3/26/2008 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
Get Some Sleep by Balloon Animal reviews
The night before Naruto's team returns to Konoha, Gaara has one last request.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,197 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 326 - Follows: 40 - Published: 5/15/2008 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
What Just Happened? by iluvEdo reviews
Naruto and Sasuke were friends for some time, now they're boyfriends. But somehow, people keep getting in the way of their relationship. Can they work past this...?Or should they just call it quits. Epilogue is up! .:COMPLETE:.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 94,432 - Reviews: 376 - Favs: 252 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 4/27/2008 - Published: 10/24/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Swapped by mcr-addiction reviews
A little diddly about if Bella was a vampire and Edward was a human, If you have already read, you should reread because I have made some changes.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,248 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 3/25/2008 - Published: 6/28/2007
Savior by Death Phoenix reviews
Naruto always had been the one to save him, had always been his savior. So why would now be any different? Oneshot.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,847 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 7 - Published: 3/15/2008 - Gaara, Naruto U. - Complete
All My Heart by LadydemonLyn reviews
Better Summary inside.High School Fic. Mostly SasuNaru other pairings inside. Naruto and Sasuke's last year of high school. Love is stalking everyone. LEMONS Cussing Currently editing all chapters
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 41,101 - Reviews: 373 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 170 - Updated: 3/6/2008 - Published: 9/28/2006 - Sasuke U., Naruto U.
To adore the Hellish by Yellow kiwi reviews
Naruto can't stop thinking of the schools outcast. It'll be hard enough to get to know him, even harder to get him to love him, but none of it will be has hard as staying together in a school that is trying so hard to tear you apart. AU, yoai, GaaraNaru
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 114,302 - Reviews: 1254 - Favs: 848 - Follows: 360 - Updated: 3/5/2008 - Published: 12/7/2006 - [Gaara, Naruto U.] - Complete
Television by martinique reviews
Sasuke invites Naruto over to watch TV. Naruto has certain regrets. Limeish. SasuNaru, NaruSasu. Vague attempts at humour. Chapter 3 - waking up to Naruto.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,896 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 115 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 3/2/2008 - Published: 4/16/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Someone Special by Tamachi-neesama reviews
A oneshot story Of SasuNaru. WARNING: YAOI, LEMON M for Sexual content. SASU SEME NARU UKE
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,132 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/1/2008 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Valentines Day Special by CaramellDansen reviews
In short, it's a Valentines Day themed PWP with SatoshiDaisuke Yoai. Some mild language, and lemon, and a bit of fluff. Enjoy!
D N Angel - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,213 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/14/2008 - Satoshi H., Daisuke N. - Complete
Carnal Attraction by SerenNoir reviews
Gaara can't help the way he feels around the kitsune. How can Naruto make his socially reclusive friend realize that he needs to learn the art of discretion? Oh, and that he's not gay.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 39,153 - Reviews: 205 - Favs: 199 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 1/25/2008 - Published: 10/14/2007 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
The Love Found In Between Breaths by Kamisado reviews
A silly little hurt comfort story I came up with. Gaara's hurting inside and Naruto is there to help. I suck at summaries, just look inside. YAOI. NaruGaa.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,385 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 8 - Published: 1/3/2008 - Gaara, Naruto U. - Complete
Tremble For My Beloved by Solemnly.Swear reviews
What if, on that first day in Biology, Edward left his cell phone behind? When Bella goes to his house to return it, Jasper loses control, and life as Bella knew it is changed forever. BellaxEdward. Please R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 14,555 - Reviews: 177 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 178 - Updated: 12/30/2007 - Published: 2/17/2007
An Almost Kiss by yang003 reviews
As far as Daisuke is innocently concerned, Satoshi is just a good friend. But Satoshi seems to be planning for so much more...and the only one who knows is Dark, who got Daisuke's Almostkiss. Daisuke X Satoshi yaoi. Rated for later lemon. COMPLETE!
D N Angel - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 9,416 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 12/26/2007 - Published: 9/26/2007 - Daisuke N., Satoshi H. - Complete
Orphan by Maxride102607 reviews
Bella is an orphan who lives in the most cruel horrible orphanage ever and is constantly beaten and worked to death but may a guy named Edward change all that? They are not vampires in this story.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,885 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 117 - Updated: 12/25/2007 - Published: 6/29/2007
Belladona by Swissa reviews
I suck at summarys,theres no good way 2 describe my story. It's very unique! But ppl have told me they love it and have never read ne thing like it. So give it a shot. It's Edward, Bella, and the Volturi, o my! Unfortunately there r no ruby slippers
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 26,529 - Reviews: 318 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 111 - Updated: 12/5/2007 - Published: 1/19/2007
Smooth by Kiri-Kiri-chan reviews
Sasuke just cant keep his eyes and hands of a certain blond haired boy who knows just how to move his hips. ONESHOTYAOI
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 830 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/30/2007 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
The Masquerade by Dazzled by toppaz reviews
1890's She is free spirited, a daughter of a rich merchant. He is a mysterious vampire. They meet at masquarade and fall in love. What happens when a jealous sister is your worst enemy? When a fire breaks out in Swan mansion Edward only has one choice...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 13 - Words: 18,088 - Reviews: 369 - Favs: 122 - Follows: 207 - Updated: 11/28/2007 - Published: 4/16/2007
The Bachelor's by BloodyRose1918 reviews
They were the towns most eligible men until four she vampires moved in next door.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 23,265 - Reviews: 393 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 151 - Updated: 11/20/2007 - Published: 6/17/2007
Being Schooled in Love by Nollie Marie reviews
Bella is the new girl on campus, Edward the big guy on campus. And when they meet, Bella will do everything in her power to stay OUT of Edward's bed while Edward wants to get to know her better. What will happen? Read 2 find out. Please R&R! No Vamps here
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 36,521 - Reviews: 2324 - Favs: 1,555 - Follows: 539 - Updated: 11/20/2007 - Published: 8/4/2007 - Complete
Benedicto by 716799 reviews
[Oneshot, RitsukaSoubi] These days, when Soubi kissed him, it didn't just make him blush, it made him feel things, in his head and in his heart and in his... other places.
Loveless - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,595 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 116 - Follows: 7 - Published: 11/15/2007 - Ritsuka A., Soubi A. - Complete
Fresh Blood by BellyGnomes reviews
Taking off where New Moon ended. Bella and Edward explore their physical relationship while outside forces attempt to pull them apart. Sex, Comedy, Drama, Romance, and Adventure all mixed into one titillating story.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 33 - Words: 75,616 - Reviews: 871 - Favs: 510 - Follows: 451 - Updated: 11/12/2007 - Published: 6/3/2007
Piano Lessons by Goldilox07 reviews
When Edward teaches Bella a few things on the piano, how does she react? This story takes place right after Edward leaves Bella. Will she ever find Edward's love again through the piano? Rated T for heavy romance, drama material, and some adult themes.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 10,815 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 11/9/2007 - Published: 6/19/2007 - Complete
Molitors haunted acres by ThePuppetMaster reviews
Halloween has come around and Naruto decides he wants every one to go on the haunted hayride togther. But Sasuke may have other ideas for him when they get into the dark haunted house. Warning Yaoi Pairings sasunaru nejigaar sakulee kibahina and KAKAIRUK
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 22,001 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 10/30/2007 - Published: 10/18/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Interupting Bella by Klutzzy55 reviews
Origanilly a oneshot, but it was hard to resist! How does doghnuts, Rosalie, and hair mix? What is Emmett's blinky thing? Why does Alice despise McDonalds? How can Jasper be a life gaurd? What is Esme better at doing than Carlisle? LOVE REVIEWS!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 42,466 - Reviews: 253 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 10/30/2007 - Published: 6/28/2007
Can't Stop by reviews
After a evening with Soubi, Ritsuka seriously starts to question his feelings towards Soubi. Warning: Yaoi lemonylime goodness.
Loveless - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,883 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/23/2007 - Complete
When we meet by Crystal blue eyes reviews
Bella is already a vampire when she goes to live with the Cullens. Edward and her seem to have a connection right away. Does he love her? Does she love him? A suprise later on in the story.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 15,865 - Reviews: 213 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 124 - Updated: 10/11/2007 - Published: 5/26/2007
A Surprise For You by SandmanAndKitsune reviews
Sequel to ‘We Belong Together’. Three months after their confession, as promised, Naruto visits his Kazekage more often. But Naruto have an idea that would please the Kazekage… NaruxGaa! Smuts and Lemons!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,533 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 13 - Published: 10/9/2007 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
Edward's Bicycle by Ocher Eyes reviews
Set between the summer of Twilight and New Moon. Edward decided to take Bella for a bike ride on a sunny day. But with Edward's vampire speed, Bella better hold on tight! Please read and review.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,379 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 9/24/2007 - Published: 7/6/2007
SuperEmmett! by ohxmyxria reviews
One fateful night, Bella stumbles along a Cullen Family secret no one ever wanted to know. And of course all the Cullens have to get in on it!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,659 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 9/23/2007 - Published: 6/26/2007 - Emmett - Complete
Country Charm by twilightfanatic reviews
Edward's hired as a farmhand for the Swan's. Their in desperate need of help after Charlie's stroke and Renee dying just a few years ago. But the story changes as these two are thrown apart and they fight to get to each other. ExB present day
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Tragedy - Chapters: 38 - Words: 58,791 - Reviews: 712 - Favs: 182 - Follows: 117 - Updated: 9/10/2007 - Published: 6/9/2007 - Complete
The Hospital by reviews
What would happen if Harry didn't die? What if he held on just a bit longer? Edward thinks that Bella's in the hospital, and that it's all his fault. What will he do? Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or new Moon.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 9 - Words: 7,944 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 9/9/2007 - Published: 6/6/2007 - Complete
Picture Perfect by ToriMiu reviews
After a night of hot sex, Naruto finds a picture of... himself? Under Sasuke's pillow? Naruto's not about to let this opportunity to tease Sasuke pass, and Sasuke's revenge is all the more sweet and spiteful. Warning: SasuxNaru, Lemon, Slash
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,372 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 379 - Follows: 48 - Published: 9/3/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
We Belong Together by SandmanAndKitsune reviews
Years after they first met at the chuunin exam, Gaara and Naruto couldn’t take their minds of each other, and finally meet again after Akatsuki kidnapped Gaara. Can they express their feelings? NaruxGaa! added with LEMONS!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,767 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 15 - Published: 9/3/2007 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
Naruto Sleep Over! by E-finch reviews
Naruto decides it's time for a brake and plans a sleepover for everyone. What will happen when it goes out of control and totally insane? Answer: ANYTHING! Warning: containts craziness, Yaoi,booze, and mature content! You've been warned! rated M to be saf
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 19,605 - Reviews: 281 - Favs: 184 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 9/1/2007 - Published: 5/7/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Meet Me at Twilight by Werewolf hunters reviews
What happens if Bella and Edward's love gets broken by a terrible mistake that Bella makes? Oh and I still like Edward more that Jacob, don't get me wrong! Just look at my name! this story used to be called A Mistake That Should Never Be Made fyi
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 28 - Words: 24,254 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 8/31/2007 - Published: 5/5/2007
The Chase by Katluva0323 reviews
Bella is being chased by both the Volturi and Victoria. Edward and her are engaged and Edward has to change her in order for the Volturi to leave Forks, but the agreement was Aro had to kill Victoria. Will the agreement work? R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 15,329 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 8/29/2007 - Published: 6/25/2007 - Complete
Moon Shadow by Octavia Deveraux reviews
What happens when disaster struck when Edward and the family were forced to stay home because of the sun? What if this disaster could mean the end to our favorite couple?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 10 - Words: 8,662 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 8/26/2007 - Published: 7/30/2007
MsSwan by jWhitley reviews
Edward never comes back.Victoria bites Bella.Then Bella becomes a teacher.What happens when she finds out who her students are?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 6,589 - Reviews: 324 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 126 - Updated: 8/22/2007 - Published: 6/18/2007 - Complete
My Inspiration by Cold Static reviews
When Seji and Shizuku both start high school, will new experiences and people cause them to split or will love prevail? Starts about a month after movie ends. Seiji x Shizuku and maybe Yuko x Sugimura. 1st fan fic, please review or flame! Ch. 6 now up!
Whisper of the Heart - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,924 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 8/13/2007 - Published: 6/14/2006
Clothes Off! by ohxmyxria reviews
/TwoShot/ Edward just wanted to spend an innocent day with Bella in the meadow. But what happens when Bella falls asleep in her clothes? Poor Edward is left to help her out of her jeans. But a hilarious misunderstanding occurs! Rated for Safety.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,064 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 36 - Published: 8/13/2007 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Confusion by YoolieYick reviews
What would have happened if Bella was still convinced that Edward came back to her out of guilt... Bella is trying her hardest not to fall for Edward again, while Edward is trying to get her to do the opposite... Picks up from the bedroom convo in NM. ExB
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 26,205 - Reviews: 309 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 108 - Updated: 8/8/2007 - Published: 7/2/2007
HEY HEY YOU YOU, I Don't Like Your Girlfriend! by HEY YOU with the glasses reviews
Bella is changed by Laurent out of want, not by being attacked and three years later, While she and Jacob are at a movie theatre there she spots Edward. Wait! Who's the Blonde that's holding his hand? FUNNY humor & Romance. Disclaimer: Do not own Twilight
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,997 - Reviews: 263 - Favs: 129 - Follows: 153 - Updated: 8/8/2007 - Published: 6/23/2007
Taking the Sun From the Sky by LadydemonLyn reviews
SasuNaru, yaoi, lemons, drama, etc. Sasuke can't seem to deal with his past and Naruto won't even think of his. Can these too heal each other? Or will both their pasts destory them? Horrible summary...
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,794 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/8/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U.
Amor est vitae essentia by La Tua Cantante737 reviews
this story takes place after twilight... edward changes bella after prom and bella is toying with her new found abilities and beauty...not to meantion bella's and edwards's love for eachother is stronger than ever. CHAPTER 11 NOW UP! finally
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 17,965 - Reviews: 202 - Favs: 76 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 8/6/2007 - Published: 9/13/2006
He tatses like you but sweeter by bertmccrackennme reviews
Bella and Edward have beenf reinds their whole life. But, a year after it turned into more then a freindship what happens? I wasnt sure what to put as the summary, so just read the story. Rated T for safety later on.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 5,694 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 8/6/2007 - Published: 8/2/2007
Passion For Eternity by Kipz56 reviews
What could Bella come up with that will make Edward see her point and change her? Age? no.. eternal life? no... sex? hm... maybe... lemons in the story!.. rated M!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 14,797 - Reviews: 289 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 208 - Updated: 8/1/2007 - Published: 6/30/2007
His Lips Caught My Fall by wanderlustlights reviews
After Potions class one day, when Draco “trips” Harry, he falls on top of his victim and kisses him. Ever heard the saying “Did you trip and her lips caught your fall?” Well… switch the ‘her’ to him’ and there ya have it. Bottom!Harry
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,564 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 7/31/2007 - Published: 7/27/2007 - Draco M., Harry P.
La Tua Cantante by lorrenlikespie reviews
Cocky, funny, Bella. Clumsy, Embarrassing Edward. They fall in love. Edward's POV
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 17,404 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 7/28/2007 - Published: 7/26/2007
Cullen's Cash Cab by teenprodigy reviews
The Cullens take Bella to New York... will get funnier, start mostly a filler. read and review!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 7,720 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 7/28/2007 - Published: 7/9/2007
The Birds and the Bees by Tee2007 reviews
Carlisle has The Talk with Edward so things are sure to go awry! The new chapter is finally here, thank you for waiting so patiently. Coming up next is Alice and Rosalie having The Talk with Bella, so stay tuned! Rated T for suggestive situations!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,989 - Reviews: 359 - Favs: 429 - Follows: 417 - Updated: 7/27/2007 - Published: 4/2/2007
Shopping Fun by EdwardCullenOwnsMySoul reviews
Alice and Bella take Edward shopping, 2 words, poor Edward. Please read and review, promise you'll like it, It's my first fic so I want opinions!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,371 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 12 - Published: 7/26/2007 - Complete
If Only by Moonlight Hanyou Girl reviews
ON HOLD! Young Love accidentally reunited after 7 long years. Chihiro's best friend, Diarsi, has come in contact of the Spirit World and unknowingly brought despair to her. Why did things work out the way they did? Who does Haku's heart belong to?
Spirited Away - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,297 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 7/21/2007 - Published: 4/9/2007 - Kohaku N., Chihiro O.
An Angels Song by omgoshxitsxmeg reviews
Why is Bella so mature? How at 6 or 7 years old did she make sure her mom paid the bills? This is my theory. She has a memory she doesnt even know about. Until the eve of Edward's birthday........DISCLAIMER: I dont own yada yada yada.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Supernatural - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,850 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 7/20/2007 - Published: 7/9/2007
Bella andthe Rocking Horse original by Natty-TrinityBlood-4-Life reviews
6 IS UP! WOOT!, anyways rated M for sexuial contact and language..... Bella Dirty LITTLE SECRET!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,232 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 7/19/2007 - Published: 5/6/2007
Thanks For the Memories by wanderlustlights reviews
ON INDEFINITE HIATUS AU story... Bella and Emmett have been together for about two years now, but could Emmett be rethinking their relationship and wanting someone else, aka Rosalie Hale, who is dating Edward Masen? What will Bella do now? Chapter 8 up n
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 21,568 - Reviews: 160 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 7/15/2007 - Published: 4/6/2007
Emmett Needs a Babysitter by LittleShortGirlFromOuterSpace reviews
Emmett is getting into trouble way too much, Alice thinks he needs a babysitter, and he will get one if he is caught messing up one more time. So the question is... will he get caught? oh my... IT HAS A MORAL! GASP
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,744 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 7/14/2007 - Published: 7/1/2007 - Complete
Why Vampires Should Use Sunscreen by Kirbiness reviews
The Cullen's rent a private island off the coast of California for the Summer, and they take Bella with them. Find out what happens to the Cullens when they don't use UV Ray protection. Rated T to be safe. CHAPTER 3 IS UP!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,731 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 7/13/2007 - Published: 7/8/2007
How To Plan a DA Meeting by Ocher Eyes reviews
Set in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. There is a lot of planning to be made to make sure that Dumbledore's Army meetings run smoothly. Here's how Hermione did it.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,650 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/12/2007 - Published: 7/11/2007 - Hermione G.
Edward is Pregnant by LittleShortGirlFromOuterSpace reviews
Alice and Jasper play a little prank on Edward. In Jasper's Idea and POV! What is this prank? And why did Edward's Pants get ripped? What Type of undes does Edward wear? Does Edward get his playback with Bella's help? Love ya! DONE!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,655 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 7/11/2007 - Published: 6/30/2007 - Complete
high school romance by darktulip reviews
Yaoi. Naruto is now a junior in highschool. He and his friends go through love and lost. Who will they eventually end up with? twist and turns will occur. GaaraNaru, kibahina shikaino zabuhaku and others
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 23,580 - Reviews: 198 - Favs: 98 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 7/10/2007 - Published: 3/17/2007 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
Spring Cleaning With The Cullens by thesunshinekid reviews
Exactly what kind of skeletons will Bella find in the Cullens' closets on the annual Spring Cleaning Day? Or, even worse, how far will the Cullens go to get rid of things?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 9,073 - Reviews: 158 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 7/9/2007 - Published: 6/12/2007 - Complete
Sneeze by VampireApple reviews
Hold your horses. I'll tell you why I've been asking all these questions in a minute. Complete. Slight ExB
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,043 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 7/9/2007 - Published: 6/14/2007 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Dancing with Edward by Blahboredom123 reviews
Just a little fluffy dancing oneshot.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 240 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/8/2007 - Complete
The Jar by Organic Banana reviews
There is more fluff in this oneshot than in my entire furby collection. and that's a lot of fluff. 218 furbys worth.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 434 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/6/2007 - Complete
The Rest of Eternity by Twilight-Temptation reviews
Bella and Edward lemon its my first so please review
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,351 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 7 - Published: 7/6/2007
Bored On A Sunny Day by Bella Masen Cullen reviews
It's a sunny day, and the Cullens are stuck inside with nothing to do. They're all bored, and soon Edward is the only sane one left! How does he survive the craziness? Okay, the summary sucks. Just read the story!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 12,181 - Reviews: 195 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 7/6/2007 - Published: 4/30/2007
Nightmare Reality by Kara Hitame reviews
[PreHawksong OneShot] Danica has dreams days before Vasili's death. He tries to comfort her, but nothing works. Then, Danica's nightmares become her reality. Rated T for fighting, DanicaVasili implied.
Kiesha'ra - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,524 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/6/2007 - Complete
Rosalie's New Car by theenvylover reviews
Emmett buys Rosalie a new car and she automatically suspects foulplay. But is it?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 354 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 7 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
My Date with Edward and Jacob by theenvylover reviews
Bella tries to make Edward and Jacob get along for a night at the movies. Finally completed just for you! :D
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,250 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 8 - Published: 7/2/2007
Bella Gets Hiccups by theenvylover reviews
What happens when Bella gets the hiccups at the Cullen household?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,017 - Reviews: 113 - Favs: 167 - Follows: 31 - Published: 7/1/2007 - Complete
You Know you want me by shattered-picture-frame reviews
Edward goes hunting, so he’s going to be absent for 2 days. Mike uses this as the perfect time to make a move on Bella. Edward comes back a day early. What will he think of Mike’s flirting? How will Jessica take advantage of this situation?FUNNY!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,410 - Reviews: 147 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 7/1/2007 - Published: 5/24/2007
Don't mess with Edward! Or Bella! by Endless Dawn reviews
This is what you get when you mix me, a lot of sugarchocolate bars, and lots of free time, and writer's block on my other stores. You get….RANDOMNESS! Like this… Oneshot.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 258 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/1/2007 - Complete
Walk It Out by ileamc reviews
What happens if Edward does the Walk It Out and its put on youtube and the whole school saw it? My first humor fanfic
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,406 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 9 - Published: 7/1/2007 - Complete
Can't Touch This by KismetHappens reviews
Edward is grounded and Bella decides to have a little fun with him. Was formerly oneshot.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,810 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 6/29/2007 - Published: 6/28/2007
Cullen Lightsaber Fun! by TwilightsVampyre reviews
What happens when Emmett comes across George Lucas' [creator.director of Star Wars] yard sale! ::insert giggles here:: Read, laugh a little, and leave a pretty review!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,398 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 10 - Published: 6/28/2007 - Complete
Busted by ohxmyxria reviews
Takes place shortly after New Moon. It's the week before graduation. Bella and Edward decided their relationship is ready for a new level. But what happens when they are caught in the act? And by who! And what will follow that fateful night?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 39,674 - Reviews: 760 - Favs: 830 - Follows: 308 - Updated: 6/26/2007 - Published: 6/12/2007 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Bella, Edward, and the Twenty Q Ball by YoolieYick reviews
Bella and Edward playing with a Twenty Q ball and trying to make it guess vampire... This is completely random... Oneshot... Takes place any random time after New Moon, it doesn't matter. Bella is NOT a vampire! Cute, funny, a little fluffy.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,097 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 21 - Published: 6/24/2007 - Complete
I Swear: A Oneshot Twilight FF by newsjukie20 reviews
BxE fluff. One shot. :]
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 649 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/24/2007 - Complete
A Misunderstanding by Jennala reviews
What if Alice saw something Bella never intented for anyone to see? What if Edward thought it was something a lot worse than it was? Will Edward still trust Bella? [ Was once a oneshot. ]
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,434 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 6/23/2007 - Published: 5/5/2007
All I Wanted Was Some Damn Cereal! by EdwardIsMyLover reviews
Oneshot about a morning at the Cullens. Title says most of it. Enjoy!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,137 - Reviews: 302 - Favs: 470 - Follows: 84 - Published: 6/23/2007 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Medicine by Vampire Kisses 54 reviews
Bella and Edward are in biology. He uses the smolder eyes on her when she's keeps a secret from her, but they don't work. Bella decides its time for him to get a taste of his own medicine.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,273 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 6/22/2007 - Published: 3/22/2007
Willing to Die by angelvamp1623 reviews
Naruto X Gaara fanfic, takes place postShippuuden. When Naruto is sent on a mission to protect the Kazekage, can he keep his emotions hidden? And when the time comes, will he choose his love, or his destiny?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,410 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 13 - Published: 6/22/2007 - Naruto U., Gaara - Complete
The Morning After by Bella Sangue reviews
New Moon Scene. Edward POV. Begins with Alice showing him all that Bella and Charlie told her, continues onto when Bella wakes up after she gets home, and talks to Edward. Read and Review, Please!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,841 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 6/21/2007 - Published: 6/12/2007
Edward's Very HumanLike Birthday by wanderlustlights reviews
It's Edward's birthday! Woot woot! Sure, the rest of the family gets Edward presents, but... what will Bella get for him? And why is Edward acting so strange?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,459 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 18 - Published: 6/20/2007 - Complete
Summer Lovin' by Kiri-Kiri-chan reviews
It's summer time! Sasuke's parents take him and his brother to the beach for [AU] [Jealous Sasuke]FIXED! finally
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 14,845 - Reviews: 135 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 6/18/2007 - Published: 5/23/2007 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Carlisle's Father's Day Experience by wanderlustlights reviews
It's Father's Day...! Of course Bella gets her own father, Charlie, something, but... what will she get for Carlisle...? Read to find out! R&R please...!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,304 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/17/2007 - Complete
The Magical Effects of Alcohol! by HolliiiCruiser reviews
Someone contaminated the lakes and rivers outside of Forks with alcohol, and it just so happens Edward is out hunting. This is totally random and RETARDED! Ever wondered if Edward wears boxers or briefs? Read chapter three to find out!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 8 - Words: 5,334 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 6/16/2007 - Published: 5/31/2007
Flabbergasted by Isabelle Evans reviews
Jessica's thoughts after rejection from Edward Cullen. PreBella.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 712 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/14/2007 - Complete
Washroom? by BloodyRose1918 reviews
What if Bella couldn't find her way out of the airport? end of TWILIGHT oneshot
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 401 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Published: 6/13/2007 - Complete
All Male by ToriMiu reviews
It started out as an argument about who was more manly... SasukeXNaruto Warning: slash, lemon
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,280 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 11 - Published: 6/3/2007 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Kamiyasuri by Doombuggy reviews
Gaara of the Desert visits Konoha to greet the new Hokage. Little does he know that Naruto is the new Hokage. What will this do for Gaara’s plans for the blond and will Naruto get to have his one night with the Kazekage before a marriage is planed?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,885 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 166 - Follows: 19 - Published: 5/7/2007 - Gaara, Naruto U. - Complete
When Sounds Become Visual by VanityWantsYou reviews
He was abused, made fun of, picked on... It was about time he was given the happiness he deserved. [SasuNaru] You've seen Naruto as an angel, but what about Sasuke?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 71,057 - Reviews: 802 - Favs: 638 - Follows: 249 - Updated: 5/7/2007 - Published: 11/16/2006 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Love, Lust, and Scandals in Forks by 4ever1 reviews
Things are heating up with Bella and Edward as they come closer to the date of the change . . .Chapter 7 is up Will Bella tell Edward why she is upset will she forgive him or will his temper get the better of him?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 12,614 - Reviews: 149 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 4/6/2007 - Published: 2/8/2007
Mirror by Stavi reviews
SasuNaru. Lemon. Yaoi. Baby I love making love in front of the mirror... Song: Mirror By: Neyo
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,660 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 184 - Follows: 28 - Published: 1/16/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
I Can't Bleed Fast Enough by Sweet Tragedies reviews
Naruto always wore his mask of happiness... and Sasuke took it for granted... [NaruSasu:Blood:Language]
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,487 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 1/16/2007 - Published: 1/6/2007 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
If you could read my mind, love by Angel of True Hope reviews
Sakura's hairstyle change incident gives her telepathy ability. What would happen if she read our boys, Sasuke and Naruto's mind. Find out yourself. SasuNaru. Major Sakura bashing. Don't read if you are Sakura's fan. A bit of innuendo.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,787 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 329 - Follows: 56 - Published: 1/14/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Ai Shite Imas by AllieSama reviews
Sakura has come to the worst realization of her life.Sasuke and Naruto together as a couple, will Sakura get between them?WARNING: yaoi, angst, mpreg, lemon..DISCLAIMER: I dont own Naruto or any of the characters
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 55,201 - Reviews: 137 - Favs: 318 - Follows: 84 - Published: 1/12/2007 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
A slow love confess itself by bevino reviews
In which Sasuke is visiting Naruto. [Beta'd.]
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,500 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 8 - Published: 10/28/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Twitch by LadydemonLyn reviews
Naruto is the only one who can get Sasuke to react. SasuNaru
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 725 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 12 - Published: 9/25/2006 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Water Conservation by desolate butterfly reviews
[NarutoGaara fic] The people of Konoha take their water for granted. Gaara shows Naruto how Suna practices water conservation with surprising results.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,789 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 145 - Follows: 18 - Published: 9/4/2006 - Gaara, Naruto U. - Complete
A Ghost Without Regret by Unfortunately Freckled reviews
A supposed moaning ghost is plaguing Konoha and Tsunade is forced into sending a team to investigate. What they find, however, is entirely different and it just might traumatize them. [SasuNaru]
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,038 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 343 - Follows: 36 - Published: 7/21/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Battle for Dominance by Charlie911 reviews
[COMPLETE] Naruto just started Konoha High School A.K.A. HELL. He catch the attention of K4, a ruthless bunch of bratty kids who enjoy tormenting others. Can he survive the peer pressure of high school? [COMPLETE]
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 122,227 - Reviews: 1095 - Favs: 1,133 - Follows: 295 - Updated: 6/6/2006 - Published: 1/15/2006 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Return of a Stranger by monkan reviews
Naruto isn't a member of team 7, he disappeared when he was a baby and no one knows what happen. Now there is a stranger at the Chuunin exam that will take it together with the Konoha rookie's. Final Chapter.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 17 - Words: 63,497 - Reviews: 444 - Favs: 446 - Follows: 169 - Updated: 5/29/2006 - Published: 3/23/2004 - Naruto U., Itachi U. - Complete
Rock Against the Window by Kankurolover88 reviews
On a lonely night Sasuke wanders to Naruto's house. He desperately wants to tell Naruto something but will Naruto understand?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,489 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 12 - Published: 5/12/2006 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
My Atrophied Heart by CyanideSlavery reviews
Sasuke has found a way to deal with the darkness within, something which Naruto understands all too well. Cutting, shounenai, one shot.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,117 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 8 - Published: 4/5/2006 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Crazy For You by Maruading Storyteller reviews
The NineTailed fox is in heat and Naruto only has eyes for Sasuke. Will Sasuke be able to tame the beast or will he break under the pressure? NarSas Yaoi, threeshot.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 9,871 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 192 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 3/5/2006 - Published: 2/19/2006 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Itchy Butt by Ryu-Ruyi reviews
Sasu X Naru. What has Naruto's Itchy Butt to do with Sasuke. What makes their sensei places bet on them. Who will win the jackpot?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,333 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 20 - Published: 2/28/2006 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Angels Refuse to Die by lunabasketcase reviews
Naruto tries to hide his cuts and bruses from team 7.Who is doing this to Naruto?How far will they push to uncover Naruto secret?Or can it push Naruto one step closer to the edge.Based on my childhood
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 11,052 - Reviews: 367 - Favs: 712 - Follows: 206 - Updated: 2/19/2006 - Published: 12/10/2005 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
My Stupid Valentine by Ryu-Ruyi reviews
Kakashi has enough of both Sasuke and Naruto's constant fighting. He gives them a choice. Either showtell each other how much you appreciate each other during this Valentine or else...Sasu Naru
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,284 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 15 - Published: 2/19/2006 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Shinjite, Believe by SpoonNinja reviews
Sasuke realizes how much he loves Naruto and will do anything for him, even if that means settling for a bit of experimenting here and there. Sadly, Naruto doesn't think it's possible for anyone to love him. What will become of these two?
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 38,517 - Reviews: 182 - Favs: 278 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 11/30/2004 - Published: 7/22/2004 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
Underneath It All by Mistiel reviews
[SasuNaru][Yaoi] Naruto always hated his birthday, but after tonight he'll have a reason to enjoy it.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,572 - Reviews: 85 - Favs: 418 - Follows: 50 - Published: 9/30/2004 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
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Escaping reviews
What if Bella was part of James's coven but not accepted by the others? Her solution is to run away from them, but where to go? 3 guesses...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,422 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 7/24/2007 - Published: 7/1/2007
Vampires Kiss reviews
A poem I had to do for English. Please give it a chance! My first FanFic!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 70 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/11/2007 - Complete
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