Bar Sira
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Joined 06-19-07, id: 1304534, Profile Updated: 11-26-17
Author has written 20 stories for West Wing, Harry Potter, Where on Earth is Carmen Sandiego, X-overs, Left Behind, Chronicles of Narnia, Thor, Misc. Tv Shows, DC Superheroes, Inside Out, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, TV Commercials, Avengers, Misc. Books, NCIS, My Little Pony, and Monty Python.

I awaked up last of all, as one that gathereth after the grape-gatherers: by the blessing of the Lord I profited, and filled my winepress like a gatherer of grapes. Consider that I laboured not for myself only, but for all them that seek learning. -Ecclus. 33:16-18

Backup account for Qoheleth.


A. Historically extant persons who figure as characters:

-Roger Ailes, founder and C.E.O. of Fox News ("Rogers", N.M.F.)
-AngelAmore, Fanfiction.Net author ("Popped Into", B Minor)
-Berathoralghoul, Fanfiction.Net author ("Poll", Aeolian Mode)
-Colin Boswell, canon of Croydon Minster ("Minister", B Minor)
-Mark Hanna, G.O.P. doyen and U.S. senator from Ohio ("Hannah", B Minor)
-Lothar Hutzler, kitchenwares manufacturer (posthumously; "Greater", B Minor)
-Jean A. Levesque, mayor of Salem, Massachusetts ("Either", B Minor)
-Mary I, queen of England ("May", B Minor)
-Ok Taecyeon, lead rapper of 2PM ("OK", B Minor)
-Philip II, king of Spain ("May", B Minor)
-Alan Turing, cybernetics pioneer ("Naval", N.M.F.)
-John Wesley, founder of the Methodist communion ("Weasley", B Minor)

B. Texts, not fandom or quote sources, from which invented elements or extensive passages are incorporated:

-Kokin Wakashu no. 176 ("Lady", B Minor)
-"On Dress (Sermon 88)", John Wesley ("Weasley", B Minor)
-"A Planet Named Shayol", Cordwainer Smith ("Exuded", B Minor)
-Principles of Greek Etymology, Georg Curtius ("Cruciatus", B Minor)
-"Serpents of the World, Unite!", text by Mark Gruenwald, images by Paul Neary et al. ("Discreet", B Minor)
-"The Shadow over Innsmouth", H. P. Lovecraft ("Swearing", B Minor)
-The Sixth Satire of Decimus Junius Juvenalis ("Satyr", Aeolian Mode, alt.)
-Star of Gypsies, Robert Silverberg ("Exuded", B Minor)
-The Time Machine, H. G. Wells ("1946-47", B Minor)
-"To Build a Fire", Jack London ("Summary", B Minor)


If you're the Dark Side, why should I believe that you'll share your cookies?

Luke 15:9 - Jesus foresees Facebook.

Ever notice that even the Coexist bumper sticker puts Christianity and Islam as far apart as possible?

Black lives matter. J. K. Rowling shouldn't have killed off Sirius.

Gender Consciousness: The quality that keeps you from following the Pope to Cuba and trying to sell T-shirts that say, "I Saw the Potato!"

If mathematics is a language, how come you can't translate Shakespeare into it?

This media pandering to Islam is getting out of hand. They tell me now that ABC plans to replace Once upon a Time with It Is Said, Though Allah Is Wiser.

The Motto of All Clowns: If you're not stepping on somebody's toes, your shoes aren't big enough.

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Minuets in B Minor reviews
What a difference one word can make...
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 24 - Words: 24,203 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 11/26 - Published: 1/18/2016
Minuets Assemble! reviews
The Avengers companion to my Harry Potter collection, "Minuets in B Minor". What a difference one word can make…
Avengers - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,079 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/25 - Published: 4/3
A Royal Heart
Does it still count as an acrostic *sonnet* if the character's name has fifteen letters?
My Little Pony - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 129 - Published: 11/1 - Twilight Sparkle - Complete
Minuets by Brain Matter
The NCIS companion to my Harry Potter collection, "Minuets in B Minor". What a difference one word can make…
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,102 - Published: 9/20
The Queen's-English Version reviews
As an American ff author, I occasionally end up making British characters refer to something of which the British name is more or less completely unknown in the United States. So, rather than needlessly bewilder my countrymen, I have created this compendium, in which the more authentic versions of such scenes and stories may be found. (See my Qoheleth profile for the originals.)
X-overs - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 475 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 8/3 - Published: 6/26/2015
One More Abbreviation reviews
A missing-chapter fic, as it were, for G. K. Chesterton's "Ballad of Abbreviations". Because it rather surprises me that the great man overlooked this one.
Misc. Books - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 79 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 6/22 - Complete
Minuets in Aeolian Mode reviews
The PJO companion to my Harry Potter collection, "Minuets in B Minor". What a difference one word can make…
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,750 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 4/1 - Published: 3/21/2016
A drabble inspired by my local cathedral rector's fondness for mission statements. It takes really determined fuzzy-mindedness to die on the *second* question…
Crossover - TV Commercials & Monty Python - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 150 - Published: 8/17/2016 - Complete
Anatta reviews
A random fragment of a longer story that will probably never be written, exploring what, ontologically, the whole IO setup really implies about humanity - and what it might be like if one of the emotions brought herself to face it.
Inside Out - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 710 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/20/2016 - Disgust
Able Was I… reviews
An abandoned story from my Qoheleth account, reposted here out of sentiment. When Zatanna, on a visit to Gotham City, finds herself suddenly casting dangerous spells without meaning to, she suspects that her power has been cursed - but can she fix the problem without playing into her enemy's hands?
DC Superheroes - Rated: K+ - English - Mystery/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,125 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 7/23/2015
The Generous Miser
*Never* believe what you see on television.
Misc. Tv Shows - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 625 - Favs: 2 - Published: 6/17/2015 - Complete
Occulted reviews
Drabble. Concerning an aspect of Frigga's last trick that easily escapes notice - unless you're Loki, of course.
Thor - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 118 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/15/2014 - Loki - Complete
Out of the Water reviews
This is the story of how a change to the past irreversibly altered the wizarding world's future. It is a story of house-elves and children's tales, of love, loyalty, and innocence; it is a story of wishes made on stars, and a magic older and stronger than that of man. This is the story of Hydra Malfoy.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 9,337 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/17/2013 - Draco M., OC
The Subreality Collection
A series of stories dealing with a strange world between fantasy and reality, where fictives, Writers, and Muses coexist in almost alarming amity.
X-overs - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 15 - Words: 41,281 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/12/2012 - Published: 2/18/2009
Childish Things reviews
It's Peter and Susan's last morning in Narnia, and Aslan has some words of counsel for the High King. My contribution to the Great Susan Debate.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,184 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/16/2011 - Peter Pevensie, Susan Pevensie
The Girl Who Lived reviews
Can a story be about Harry Potter's long-lost American sister without descending into hopeless Mary-Sue-dom? That is what our test subject, Miss Rowena Clay Osborn, will determine for us.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 18 - Words: 35,876 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 7/7/2009 - Published: 7/6/2009 - OC
Vignette. One shall be taken, one shall be left... no matter what the lyrics say.
Left Behind - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 170 - Published: 5/29/2009
From Lilongwe to Tipperary reviews
It's a long way to go.
Where on Earth is Carmen Sandiego - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 202 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 11/6/2008 - Complete
HP goes to ME reviews
it's not what you think trust me
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 138 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/28/2008 - Complete
Stubborn reviews
Drabble. To convince Bartlet to run the first time, Leo had to be persistent, creative, and just a trifle annoying...
West Wing - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 131 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/5/2007 - Leo M., Jed B. - Complete
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