"It takes an idiot to do cool things...that's why they're cool. - FLCL

A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step. - Lao Tzu

A single step can crush a man's balls. - Girlfriend.

"If the opposite of Pro is Con then the opposite of Progress is Congress" - random thought.

"Yes!" "No!" "What was the question?" - me

"There is a fine line between sanity and insanity, and I have white out" - me

"In War - Victory, In Peace - Vigilance, In Death - Sacrifice" - The Grey Wardens (Dragon Age Origins)

B.O.H.I.C.A.: Bend Over Here It Comes Again

F.U.B.A.R. : F#cked up beyond all recognition

H.U.M.A.S.: Head Up My @ss Syndrom

S.N.A.F.U. : Situation Normal All F*cked Up

A.D.O.S.D : Attention Deficit Oh Shiny Disorder (Friend says I have this)

F.O.C.U.S. : F*ck Off Cuz Ur Stupid - T-shirt

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F. : Do I Look Like I Give A F*ck! - Necros Chris

F.I.N.E: F#cked IN Extreme - Rachel Morgan "Ever After"

Its's a Stupid idea, I'll go first - Girlfriend to Me

What color is the Sky in your world - Me to friends daughter

The Angel on my shoulder was gang raped by the devil from the other shoulder and the voices in my head - Me to friend about decisions made.

"Madness & Sanity are labels given by society...and I am Anti-Social" - Me

"I am fluent in three languages. English, Sarcasm and Profanity." Girlfriend to me

"I am right 97 percent of the time, who cares about the other 4 percent." - my t-shirt.

Diamonds are a Girls Best friend, Boobs are everybody's friend - Girlfriend to me at the bar.

"It doesn't Matter whose on First, I'm holding a F'n steel bat" - me at bar league baseball game.

"There is no such thing as overkill, there is only open fire and reload" - shirt

Golf is the only game I can legally play and drive drunk - Uncle to Me

NASCAR fans are as violent as any Hockey Game in Canada - Uncle watching ESPN

When did chess become a sport? did I miss it becoming full contact? do the pieces explode - Cousin upon hearing chess declared an "olympic sport"

Follow up statement "What's next Pokemon at the Olymics? Bey Blade?" cousin again

Random Things about me:

1. I am a slacker in some things and highly motivated in others.

2. I'm 39

2a. I live in Wisconsin, USA

3. I've broken nearly every bone in my legs at least twice...and it hurts when it rains or is cold.

4. I have a degree in journalism but I'm to lazy to do anything with it.

5. my girlfriend is the best thing to happen to me and keeps me sane.

5-a. My girlfriend plays video games, loves anime, stands 5'6 110lbs, and her hair is currently black with red streaks.

6. I love Anime and play video games. my screen name is the same as my author name.

10-12-13: I posted NILF on archiveofourown.org under my pen name. if you see my story somewhere other than here, my yahoo group or archive report the person please or let me know. while I have given permission to some to use some of my ideas if you see my story elsewhere without my name its not with permission.