Saltwater Insomniac
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Joined 08-10-07, id: 1348425, Profile Updated: 12-23-11
Author has written 3 stories for Pirates of the Caribbean, and Harry Potter.


To begin with, I'm a dreadful cynic. While I'm not sure if I actually consider this to be a fault or a virtue, my family has made their feelings perfectly clear on that matter.

Secondly, I am terribly lazy. I haven't posted any new fics since sometime last year, though I've had several excellent ideas. It generally takes me about a month to get just one down on paper (or computer screen, be that as it may). I spend a week formulating the idea, two weeks procrastinating, six days poking around with the first paragraph, and then it only takes about one day to write it. Go figure.


-Traveling anywhere and everywhere

-Doctor Who

-Playing soccer



As far as fanfictions go, I usually read Harry Potter.

Wait, I take it back. It appears I really am picky. Funny how that works...xD

There are a few things I hate more than anything else in fanfiction:

1.) Poor grammar and/or spelling. Mistakes now and then are fine. Saying "luv" instead of "love" or not putting dialog on separate lines? Not fine.

2.) Summaries that say "Better than it sounds" or "I suck at summaries." Look, even if your summary sucks, don't admit it! If you don't have the confidence to put a positive summary out there, I'm just going to assume you suck at writing as well. Sorry.

And, finally, a piece of writing advice brought to you by yours truly...

Write about something you'd love to read about. If you hate Snape and Lily pairings, for god's sake, don't write about them! If, deep down, you really love reading about The Giant Squid's digestive system or the mechanics of being a vampire, write about it! Passion always shows.


The Secret Life of Sirius Orion Black--"This is not a happy tale. In this story, no one wins and everyone loses everything they have ever held dear to them. Mothers, daughters, sons, wives, fathers, husbands. All are lost in the end, even the people that are still right in front of you." From his Azkaban cell, a 32 year old Sirius Black tells just how much he lost the night Lily and James Potter were murdered. Rated T for mild language and adult situations. Okay, I admit it, I abandoned this after the first frenzied couple of minutes I spent writing it. However, I've been playing around with it and am currently (as of 2-26-09) bringing it back to life.

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So Much To Learn by AdhesivePrincess reviews
Elizabeth experiences how difficult being a pirate really is. Harsh reality, incredible adventures and subtle magic combine to give her quite an education. And Elizabeth is not the only one with much to learn. AU, whelp-free, J/E. Yes, still in progress, since 2007! It's now 2022, I'm still working on it, and I'm still not dead yet!
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: M - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 118 - Words: 273,423 - Reviews: 1047 - Favs: 561 - Follows: 517 - Updated: 12/15/2022 - Published: 5/23/2007 - Elizabeth S., Capt. Jack Sparrow
The Season Bright by Wild Magelet reviews
Christmas, 1999. Wizarding England, had Voldemort never managed to create the horcruxes but stayed dead and buried after the attack on the Potters. Some events have unfolded a little differently. Some couples are just meant to be. Remus/Tonks AU.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 17,234 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 240 - Follows: 29 - Published: 12/23/2011 - N. Tonks, Remus L. - Complete
A Collection of Lily and James by Queen Nightingale reviews
Why don't you believe in me," Lily said angrily, James smoothly taking the cigarette out of her hand and inhaling the smoke. J: "Because most of the time I'm just wasting my breath." JPLE Three-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,581 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 4/6/2011 - Published: 5/4/2010 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
Glass Hearts: the Sixth Year by coolpearls reviews
In fact, he didn’t know if he had ever felt more alive than when he was kissing her. MWPP, Lily, 6th year.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 95,840 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 12/12/2009 - Published: 2/6/2006 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
New Discoveries by Rosie-not-Rose reviews
Two months after Doctor #2 and Rose are back on the parallel Earth, they spend Christmas morning together, and it doesn't all go entirely smoothly. Not much of a plot, mostly fluff! Oneshot. Can be read as the original Doctor too, really. Prompt from LJ.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,455 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/2/2009 - 10th Doctor, Rose T. - Complete
Hands by bobbymcfoogle reviews
Why does the Doctor always hold hands with his female companions? Does he have more in common with us "apes" than he thinks?
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 471 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 12 - Published: 1/1/2009 - 10th Doctor, 9th Doctor - Complete
Operation Seduce Sirius by Joou-sama reviews
Remus loves Sirius, but Sirius is too dense to realize he loves Remus back. So what better than to make him jealous? With a little loving help from James of course. Main couple: RLSB Other: JPRL JPLE. Slash.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 17,407 - Reviews: 209 - Favs: 306 - Follows: 166 - Updated: 12/26/2008 - Published: 9/10/2005 - Remus L., Sirius B. - Complete
Brothers and Sisters by xXforksndspoons reviews
The world knows them as the Hale twins, but ever wonder how Jasper and Rosalie really see each other? Alice is a pixie compared to Emmett's brawn, but do opposites attract? The summer between Twilight and New Moon. Usual pairings, a toss of Edward/Bella
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,157 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/13/2008 - Complete
A Million Years Ago by freudian fuckup reviews
It was just a physical thing, a boy thing, a sex thing. It had nothing to do with his friend, the one he’d fight and bleed and kill and die for, because friends simply didn’t do the things they were doing except for when they did .
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,225 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 138 - Follows: 18 - Published: 2/4/2008 - Sirius B., James P. - Complete
Sorry I Missed Your Funeral Fred by Kazima Kuwabara reviews
Why God? Why Fred? He had a was all planned out! Why didn't you take me? I didn't know what I wanted to do with my life...I had no plans, no goals! Fred had a life...why him? Why not me?"
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,060 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/20/2008 - George W., Fred W. - Complete
The Interrogation of Lily Evans by Leigh A. Sumpter reviews
Lily and James have been going out for over two weeks now, which is the longest relationship James has ever endured. To ensure that James is making the proper decision, the Marauders kidnap Lily to ask her some questions.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,174 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 128 - Follows: 22 - Published: 12/26/2007 - Lily Evans P., James P. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Secret Life of Sirius Orion Black reviews
This is not a happy tale. In this story, no one wins and everyone loses everything they have ever held dear to them." From Azkaban, 32 year old Sirius Black reveals just how much he lost the night Lily and James Potter were murdered. Rated T for language
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,120 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/14/2008 - Sirius B.
The Tragedy of Remus Lupin reviews
Remus J. Lupin was not a happy man. He did not live a happy life and it was only in death he could find comfort. Reflecting on the 7 tragedies of Remus's life. DH SPOILERS. Oneshot, Complete
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,917 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 10/14/2007 - Remus L. - Complete
The Rum Will Always Be Gone reviews
Contrary to popular belief, Captain Jack Sparrow is not everything you've ever wanted. Elizabeth remembers this while drinking rum one night. Oneshot, Sparrabeth. Rated M for mild sexual content
Pirates of the Caribbean - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,651 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/14/2007 - Elizabeth S., Capt. Jack Sparrow - Complete