ElvishKiwi
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Joined 08-17-07, id: 1353471, Profile Updated: 12-09-09
Author has written 3 stories for Lord of the Rings, Peter Pan, and X-Men: The Movie.

I ain't gonna bore you all with excuses. I'm afraid that life has finally caught up with me, however, and is swiftly pulling me under. Hence fanfiction has been forgotten for the moment, as I do all I can to keep on top of it all. I figured I should inform you all, as life doesn't look like letting up anywhere in the near future. You needn't lose hope altogether; my fanfiction is still my delight and the moment I catch a fair chunk of elusive spare time I'll be back with a vengeance.

Simply put, I am here to bid adieu to you all and put my account on hiatus. Yes, the dreaded words...

--waves forlornly--

A BIT ABOUT ME:

First and foremost I am a Christian - yes, one of those scary ranting Bible toting people. We tend to have a reputation for being stuffy, close-minded wackos, and while I cannot really blame anyone for thinking me wacko, I'd protest that I'm anything but stuffy.

I live in a small town in the heart of New Zealand. Yes, you may feel free to envy me - if you know where it is. Despite its being one of the most awesome places in the world, a whole lot of people don't know where it is, Americans being especially bad. When I was over there earlier this year several people thought it was somewhere near China, one woman thought in was in Africa, and another guy told me it was beside Greece. But the worst of the lot were those who thought it was a state in Australia. Can you imagine anything more insulting? If you think New Zealand is part of Australia, go away and look up a map. Then, and only then, will I speak to you.

I don't read Slash. Yes, I have a minor case of Homophobia, by the true definition of the word. Just the summaries are scary enough, let alone the pairings, which are often the stuff of nightmares these days. I am very, very afraid.


MY TAKE ON FLAMES, FLAME RISING AND THE FORUM WARS:

When I first got here and saw flames I thought What jerks! and felt righteously indignant that anyone would treat any author that way. Then I discovered the screeds of Mary-Sues and horrible writing littering this place and decided that Flamers might have a point, after all. Then I stumbled across The Fireplace and discovered Flame Rising.

Believe it or not, the Flamers are usually really, really nice people when you get to know them, and they flame for a good reason, and a completely understandable one. Most of them are very good writers themselves, and they are as fed up as I am over the garbage filling our fandoms. Through lurking in the Fireplace I've developed a lot of respect for Flame Rising and many of his lackeys, as well as many of his arch enemies.

Yet while I sympathise with their motivations, I will never be a flamer. The line between Flames and Harsh Constructive Criticism is a fine one, but I believe there is a definite one, and it lies in the subject of the criticism. Constructive criticism, however harsh, is criticising the story, while flames are criticising the author. I can see the value in harshly criticising a story; things here are published to the public and must have a decent amount of effort put into them, and the authors must be willing to receive criticism if they open their work to the public. On top of this this is a fanfiction website, one must respect the canon of the fandom one is writing for if one hopes to be taken seriously. We have the right to pull people up about these things. But I can not see any reason why the criticism should be directed at the author rather than the faults in the story.

As for the Forum wars, I explored the forums for about a month, just lurking and watching the various parties and people. A lot can happen in a month, and I think I've become well acquainted with the things going on around there. I've seen a whole lot of great friendships grow, I've seen people helping new writers and sharing tips things they've learned over the years here, I've seen a lot of laughter and fun and friendship. I've also seen people hurt and made fun of, friendships broken, and a whole lot of immaturity and snarkiness. And in the end, I spent hours and hours online and neglected my writing. I wouldn't call that time wasted - I've learned a lot! But in the end I decided that I came here to write, and the forums aren't going to help me do that. So I'm not going to get involved.


Snippity snip goes the rest - If you're part of the small minority who have time for reading random stuff, your time would be better spent reading my story, and if that doesn't appeal to you, one of the ones on my favourites list. They're all very good, and there are a whole lot of different genres there, from humour to romance to angst. There are some great stories here, however difficult to find they may be!

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The Awkward Adventures of Meghan Whimblesby by FebruarySong reviews
What happens when a girl who is afraid of blood, thinks Legolas is a complete fruitcake, and knows next to nothing about LotR gets dumped into Middle earth with the Fellowship? Crazy spin on a MarySue fic.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 43 - Words: 134,990 - Reviews: 1885 - Favs: 901 - Follows: 1,001 - Updated: 10/21/2013 - Published: 7/14/2007 - [Legolas, OC]
In His Face A Shining Light by Carryon14 reviews
On a bright day in spring Queen Lothiriel is abducted and taken to Harad so that she might atone for the crimes of Rohan. Back in Edoras, King Eomer finds to his astonishment that his loveless marriage is not what it seems. COMPLETE. Warning: minor character death, angst.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 61,820 - Reviews: 107 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 6/1/2013 - Published: 4/15/2013 - Eomer, Lothíriel - Complete
Playing God by Evendim reviews
Boromir, fresh from leading his first battle as Captain-General, discusses with Denethor the burden of command.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,189 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/14/2010 - Boromir, Denethor - Complete
Strangled Ebb by InChrist-Billios reviews
First person one-shot retelling of The Little Mermaid, written for Elki.
Fairy Tales - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,578 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/27/2009 - Complete
Thwarted Fate, The Book of Descent, Volume II by The Whills reviews
Like fire across the galaxy, the Clone Wars is spreading, and with it grows the strength of the Dark Side. As the lines between good and evil blur, the Chosen One struggles to find the balance between his duty, his conscience and his heart.
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 17 - Words: 96,952 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 79 - Updated: 5/23/2009 - Published: 3/27/2006 - Anakin Skywalker, Padmé Amidala
The Voice of the Sea by poeticmaiden reviews
Ariel struggles with living behind the walls she has built for herself and her daughter. Based on a scene from Little Mermaid 2.
Little Mermaid - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 719 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/20/2009 - Complete
Arranged by Captain Fantastic reviews
It's the tale of two people who almost get married but don't, and how they proceed to slaughter the fairy tale norm with adventures including, but not limited to: greedy kings, deserts, ships, dragons, strange cats, and this girl who talks to herself.
Fairy Tales - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 55 - Words: 186,176 - Reviews: 403 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 4/15/2009 - Published: 12/3/2007 - Complete
The Guardian by acacia59601 reviews
Peter is at university and trying to balance the memories and effects of his life as High King with his life in England. Making this more difficult is the fact the woman he is falling in love with constantly brings out the High King in him. REPOSTED 12/08
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 31 - Words: 118,697 - Reviews: 712 - Favs: 474 - Follows: 160 - Updated: 12/17/2008 - Published: 4/30/2006 - Peter Pevensie - Complete
Okay, NOW Panic! by boz4PM reviews
This is the sequel to Don't Panic! We follow Penny as she journeys with Elrond and Arwen south to Minas Tirith, via Lothlorien and Edoras. She thought Bree and Imladris were bad? She ain't seen nothing yet.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 60 - Words: 465,490 - Reviews: 2358 - Favs: 1,184 - Follows: 433 - Updated: 9/13/2008 - Published: 4/10/2004 - Complete
I Do, But That's It by InChrist-Billios reviews
A story about two sets of lives which go directly opposite of Fairy Tale norm, and how the occupants survive without killing each other... :set in the land of Not All Surprises Are Pleasant:
Fairy Tales - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 38 - Words: 135,582 - Reviews: 521 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 6/17/2008 - Published: 8/20/2007 - Complete
Flowers of the Citadel by SarahBelle reviews
In an AU where Finduilas died when her third child was born her loss sews turmoil in the Steward's family. As her children grow so does the power of Mordor, and their greatest fear is that when the Shadow confronts them they will not be strong enough.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 72,333 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 4/26/2008 - Published: 4/23/2005 - Faramir, Boromir
Peredhel by Epilachna reviews
A half-elven child finds safety and acceptance in Imladris, Elrond suffers the lonliness of being peredhel, and Erestor relives a nightmare from his past. Rivendell and Lothlorien elves will appear. Some cliche breaking within.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 48 - Words: 123,644 - Reviews: 514 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 4/11/2008 - Published: 7/8/2006 - Elrond, Erestor - Complete
O, Cruel Fate! by greywing reviews
A reclusive botanist finds herself unceremoniously whisked into Middle Earth...in the form of the studliest male elf to ever walk the face of Arda. Featuring irritated Valar,fainting ellith, an unscrupulous healer, and a completely clueless Cirdan.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 21,221 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 4/7/2008 - Published: 9/23/2006 - Glorfindel, Elrond
Just A Lifetime Too Late by Fili reviews
One could call the lord Denethor a lot of things, but NEVER irrational...' One of the Tower Guard watches helplessly as Denethor descends into darkness... Slightly AU, NOT slash
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,992 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 2/24/2008 - Published: 10/2/2006 - Denethor
Her Toes by Clar the Pirate reviews
I recently considered becoming the owner of a pair of transparent shoes. This story is dedicated to them.
Fairy Tales - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 499 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 7 - Published: 1/21/2008 - Complete
Fairy Tale Reality Check by trixyflixy reviews
A poem about a modern girl caught in a fairy tale world
Fairy Tales - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 556 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/5/2008 - Published: 8/4/2007 - Complete
The Little Swan by Cressida1 reviews
As a young man, Denethor meets a little girl one day in the White Tower.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,775 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 7 - Published: 12/5/2007 - Denethor - Complete
The March Stepper by Die Schildkroten reviews
An omniscient narrator's eye view retelling of the story of The Three Billy Goats Gruff, with special appearances by a Girl.
Fairy Tales - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 17,300 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 11/3/2007 - Published: 9/26/2007
Not All Surprises are Pleasant REWRITE SEE PROFILE by InChrist-Billios reviews
COMPLETE: A princess is unwillingly engaged to a duke's son, but no one except the king knows why. A kidnapping, struggle of heart, and many other things combine to make this tale not quite of the normal variety, though it sounds a little cliché to start
Fairy Tales - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 40 - Words: 59,576 - Reviews: 582 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 4/15/2007 - Published: 7/24/2006 - Complete
Immortal Tears by Epilachna reviews
A young Eomer has his first encounter with elves and learns that the Firstborn are not immune to death.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,324 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/25/2007 - Eomer, Theodred - Complete
A Fair Trial by Maeve Riannon reviews
At the end of the First Age, Sauron refused to submit to the judgement of the Valar. But, whose fault was it? And was he really alone in his decision? Maiarin humour.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,314 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 11 - Published: 12/14/2006 - Complete
Denethor's Busy Day by Fili reviews
A random day in the life of Denethor, Steward of Gondor. In between history altering events such as international trade meetings, Denethor is bored. What will he do? Read to find out! oneshot, no slash
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,149 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Published: 11/21/2006 - Denethor - Complete
Not Prisoners by Jaffee Leeds reviews
Feanor and Ingwe have a talk. Before they eave Valinor and after Finwe's death. Please R&R Just a one shot.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,004 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 5 - Published: 9/16/2006 - Complete
The Prince Who Spoke Gibberish by Clar the Pirate reviews
or The Princess Who Overslept
Fairy Tales - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,693 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 8/20/2006 - Published: 8/18/2006 - Complete
Thwarted Fate, The Book of Descent, Volume I by The Whills reviews
A long time ago, in a galaxy that never was... At the end of the Battle of Geonosis, Senator Amidala chooses duty over love and the forbidden marriage never takes place. How strange that a decision so personal could alter the fate of the galaxy forever...
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 15 - Words: 57,841 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 3/24/2006 - Published: 2/22/2006 - Anakin Skywalker, Padmé Amidala - Complete
Don't Remember by Rinse reviews
And Lucy won't remember. Lucy can't remember. Not any longer. The youngest Pevensie deals with leaving Narnia behind, post LWW.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,641 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/17/2006 - Complete
The Magnificent by Capegio reviews
Susan was gentle. Edmund was just. Lucy was valiant. But away from Narnia, how can one be magnificent?
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,017 - Reviews: 140 - Favs: 202 - Follows: 18 - Published: 12/24/2005 - Complete
Theme and Variations by Gandalfs apprentice reviews
Tolkien meets Jane Austen. Marriage is on everyone's mind in Minas Tirith after the war. Told from Faramir's point of view as he adjusts to his new life and gets to know the king. WINNER FIRST PLACE HUMOR GONDOR MEFA 2006.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,919 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/1/2005 - Aragorn, Faramir - Complete
Unknowing, Nerdanel Sells Pearls To A Prince by Nol reviews
The first meeting of Nerdanel and Feanor.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,519 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 14 - Published: 9/2/2004
Reasons 2 by Rosie26 reviews
Forget the other "reasons" This is what really happened. Previously uncovered documentation which tells the true story of the relationship between Denethor and Faramir. My first real venture into humour...please be gentle.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,461 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/7/2004 - Faramir
Redwall Defense Guide by Toboe LoneWolf reviews
Aka, How to Save the Blinkin' Abbey...AGAIN! A guide on how to PROPERLY defend Redwall Abbey!
Redwall - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,400 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 7/24/2004 - Published: 3/23/2004 - Complete
Don't Panic! by boz4PM reviews
Penny is panicking. Where is she? How did she get here? How is she going to get home and whose backside will she kick first when she does? A woman lost in Middle Earth wearing only her pyjamas. This can't be good... (STRONG language; NOT a M-Sue)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 27 - Words: 136,860 - Reviews: 1205 - Favs: 1,564 - Follows: 186 - Updated: 3/27/2004 - Published: 1/17/2004
Aglarond by ErinRua reviews
A dwarf, a cave and a claustrophobic elf. Wherein Gimli and Legolas venture into the Crystal Caves of Aglarond at war's end and Legolas is lost for words. MITHRIL AWARD Winner!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,759 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 111 - Follows: 8 - Published: 3/10/2003 - Gimli, Legolas
The Star in the Ocean by Le Chat Noir reviews
What may have had crossed Maglor's mind as he stood, last of seven, on the Shore, with the Silmaril in his hand.
Silmarillion - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 765 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 4 - Published: 3/2/2002
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Salad days reviews
Does eternal youth ever get old? Peter Pan meets the X-men and has to face what it means to never grow up. Finished in three chapters.
Crossover - Peter Pan & X-Men: The Movie - Rated: K - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,639 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 10/29/2009 - Published: 10/27/2009 - Peter Pan, Cyclops - Complete
Tears reviews
She had been a princess, he just a common boy; yet she had loved him. Now he was the murderer of her family, the enemy of her people, and the Lord of Edoras. And she was doomed to watch her people die. The story of Helm Hammerhand's daughter. Oneshot
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,891 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/19/2008 - Complete
Palantír reviews
Denethor II was undoubtedly among the greatest of Gondor's Stewards, yet also the most hated. Why did he fall so low? Or did he? Set during Return of the King, with flashbacks to his earlier life. Book verse. Canon, or as close as I can make it.
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 5 - Words: 22,322 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/31/2008 - Published: 8/30/2007 - Denethor, Faramir