Author has written 7 stories for Calvin & Hobbes, Twilight, Gundam Wing/AC, Inuyasha, and Naruto.
This is my universal disclaimer so it's the only one you're ever gonna see.
I DO NOT own the caracters/plot/books/anthing else of the already existing stories I use to write fanfics (meaning Harry Potter, Calvin and Hobbes, Gundam Wing/AC and/or Twilight are you insane?!).
The only thing I own (and sometimes not even then) is the plot of the fics and the words that are in the story itself (and those belong partway to whoever the fic is about).
Here's a bit about me.
I'm female. Black. Have 2 little sisters and my second language is french and I'm fluent in english. I am also a fan on poste-ons (as you will see) lol . (27661128)
My favorite shows/books/movies are (not in any specific order)
-Pirates of the Caribbean
-The devil wears Prada.
-LORD OF THE FLIES (by William Golding) (OMFG!! It ROCKS! GO READ!)
- The Giver (Same as the above)
-STAR TREEEEEKKKK!!! (TOS thank you very much! I'm a proud trekkie ^^)
OMFG SUPER FUNNY QUOTE BY MY 11 year old SISTER (who is the middle child):
"Gee thanks mom. I really feel loved. Cristalake [that's me] gets 14 000$ for Uni. L [that's the youngest] gets 300$ a month topay for her future school and me... Me I get a lollypop." -_-
OMFG ROTFL LOL!!! ^^ cuz its so true!
really REALLY good fics/ authors/ communities you should DEFINITELY go check out!! Sadly, theyre not on FFNet.
According to authorities around the world, there are five different kinds of health that human beings strive for: Physical, Mental, Emotional, Spiritual and Social. A healthy, happy life results from keeping all these elements in balance.
A truly awesome Hikaru no Go fic. It's complete, long, well-written, has a plot, is yaoi (always a plus ;-)), is a HikaruxAkiraxHikaru fic, their relasionship is very realistic (everyone doesn't just miraculously accept that they're gay for each other... they have to fight for it!) Sai kinda-sorta-not really comes back (Hikaru gets closure at the least...), its original, it's has a wonderfully well-written lemon every chapter, there is actual ROMANCE (not just some senseless PwP) and did I mention it has a PLOT!?
I don't think I would know love if it wore a name badge and hit me with a mallet." Akira x Hikaru
When Shindo Hikaru was fourteen years old, Touya disappeared from the go world. And then his life fell apart. Years later, he finds Touya again, but going back to the world of professional go may just prove impossible...for more than one reason. Yakuza AU
GW/AC fic. Pairings are 5x2 3x4 Duo is your average, run of the mill, low-salary, part-time worker at a gaz station. The only special thing about him (beside his meter long brain and purple eyes) is that he's a Clairvoyant. Not a physic. A Clairvoyant. He can read anyones mind whenever he wants to, or so he thought. When mysterious new neighbors move in and all his attempts to read their mind results in massive nose bleds, Duo finds himself getting in over his head. Now he's tangled in a messy affair of love, death, magic, blood, werewolves and murders.
(Two parts to the Story. Part 1: Blood or chocolate, is COMPLETE. Part two: Blood in Siberia is W.I.P
The Devil made me do it by Isabella Kraft
Quatre Winner, also known as Satan, decides to do something particularily evil. In comes Trowa Barton. An innocent mortal priest with a pure soul. Quatre decides to play the ultimate prank on Heaven by having someone (namely Trowa) enter with a record for murder, rape, thievery... all those evil crimes, by playiong on Trowa's naiveté and Heaven's " if you didn't know it can't be used against you " clause but finds himself falling in love. What's the Devil to do to protect his endangered reputation while keeping his love/sex toy Trowa.
Trial and Error
A funny as hell Gundam Wing story with Heero/Duo, Trowa/Quatre and Wufei/Relena pairing. Let's just say, Heero is trying to find his comrades a significant other...
You know you have a bad story when...
- you have more than one grammar/spelling error in summary. This includes all caps lock / no capital letters. (my storie ist the bestest Bcause it has yaoi! TWO GUYS POKE EAHC OHTER WITH FUNNIE STUFT! READ MY TSORY!11!)
- you have six chapters in 2,000 words. It just doesn't work.
- you have 8 chapters in 1,000 words. (I've seen it before)
- the author includes the words "because I'm that evil" more than once a chapter. Hell even once in a story is too much. (Jonny Pimpin crashed into a wall that crumbled. A brick hit him in the face. Then another one hit him because I'm that evil.)
- the author switches between tenses every paragraph. (She is running to the store to buy food. She bought food because she was hungry).
- the author switches between views every paragraph. (She ran down the hall. The I took a left. then you ran into a dead end and turned around.)
- the summary includes words of encouragement for people to read it. (Jonny Pimpin becomes a rebel! Better than summary! Please read! Don't forget to review!)
- the summary includes words of discouragement. (Don't like, don't read. I don't want flamers!) Ever think that maybe there is a reason they flame?
- the summary includes the authors opinion of things. (Jonny Pimpin finally finds his true love in the form of Katie Rocker. Jonny/Katie. YAH! JONNY4EVA!1!)
- the story is seen as the final test for the decoding class. (Jonny desIded 2 hav fuhn bi goeen 2 teh movee thEatuhr. He mett Katie they'er.. Thei kieD wen teh lites went aut. HEHE!) (Fred "Well George, I believe the first line translates to Jonny has fun by being a bisexual." George "No chance, it means Jonny had fun moving to Theador's Bisexual Sister's, Katie's, hehe house." Fred "By god George, I think you got it! Now whats a hehe house?")
- the author asks readers if they should continue the story and the majority answers no. (Well this story isn't looking like I wanted it to. Should I continue it?) ( FunLuva "No, delete this." Hater2004 "the summary had potential, but after that... shrugs" HappiAngel "GO KILL URSELF! YOU SUCK AT LIFE AND UR STORY IS A REFLECTION OF THAT!")
- the author updates slower than me and yet only 1,000 words at a time. (I seriously don't know what to say to that.)
- when you say "I suck at summaries." People who put that always have a sucky story accompanying it. I have to see a good story with a "suck at summaries" addition to the summary.
THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF FAN FICTION WRITERS By Twila Starla, which was taken off of Instant Coffee's profile, which was taken off of Mary Grayson's Little Robin's profile, paraphrased:
1. There is no limit to what can happen in life, just as the possibilities are endless in what can occur in a story.
2. Speaking on character - flaws rock! A character that can kick butt AND get their butt kicked is (Insert adjective here) It's a character everyone will love because they can relate to it. NEVER create a character that no one can relate to, at the least, on an emotional level. You WILL get flamed and I WON'T be horrible enough to not sign in, like many other flamers out there. (BTW - if flamers can't sign in and state their opinion, chances are they're too scared of your retaliation and weren't worth listening to.)
3. Stand out. Why take an idea already formed when you have the power to create a situation not yet inferred? Take advantage of the possibilities your mind can produce, and make something out of it.
4. Detail is the reader's way of seeing what you wish to depict. Why express what your characters are feeling with _ and @_ etc.? There is no harm in spoon feeding your audience with imagery.
5. Plagiarism does not make you a better writer. It makes you an imbecile for discrediting another person's work, and a writer whose passion is not to be taken seriously any longer.
6. Never be afraid to start over! There are many instances in which something will not work right the first time. If so, why keep things that way? After all, if you do not like what you wrote, yet insist on keeping things so, chances are your readers will not like what you wrote, as well, and may question your ability and talent as an author.
7. Smugness does NOT work in the writing field. Take the initiative to review another story that may interest you, and chances are, you will be repaid just the same. ALL stories are review-worthy.
8. The summaries and titles of a story are just as important as the story itself. It is the reader's first impression of what they are about to read. Often I find myself reading summaries and then reading the story to find it enchanting, and worthy of my favourites' list.
9. Do not write for reviews, for if you do not write for the enjoyment and experience of writing, then you are writing for a lost cause.
10. Lastly: Writing is an art; treat it as such. There is no shortcut to producing the best type of art imaginable. There is only producing the best type of art imaginable with one's heart, soul, and imagination.
MURPHY'S LESSER-KNOWN LAWS:
1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong.
7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.
I pitied him in his blindness but can I boast, "I see?" Perhaps there walks a spirit close by, who pities me.”
"Never argue with an idiot, for they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience."
THE ONLY GOOD IS KNOWLEDGE AND THE ONLY EVIL IS IGNORANCE.
History is written by the winners. (The is not right side or wrong side in war, there's only whos's left)
-I don't know
The reason why life sucks so much is beause there must be a balance of hapiness and sadness. If everyone had a perfect life, there would be one person out there to whom all the shit happens. As that person wouldn't be willing to live past the age of 5, we all get a bit of the pain so everything works out but when things go wrong we only see the bad parts of our life and the good parts are totally ignored!
The soul is like a glass prism. With it, you can draw anything who's on your mind on a canvas. If you take away the prism, there is no color and as such, the canvas is useless.
-Me. (I thought of this last night (June 11th 2008))
Love isn't wild and thrilling and dangerous. You don't notice when it happens. You just realise one day that the other person is the most beautiful being in the world (even all their disfigurements look perfect) and that there is nowhere else you'd rather be then spending time with them. It's a myriad of pinks and golds and soft summer sunsets on a canvas of Time.
-Me. (Once more, last night. I had lots of inspiration. lol )
I believe that being an eviromentalist will not save the world. Let's face it... There aren't enough people recycling to save the Earth. The only way recycling will help is by soothing my conscience and giving me the right to say that I tried when the world crumbles to dust around us.
-My pessimistic thoughts
An optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds. A pessimist fears that THIS IS TRUE.
- James Cabbel
Is it possible for someone to become addicted to therapy, and if so how would you treat them?
Copied this and made my own version from some else’s profile. It amuses me :)
List twelve of your characters from your fandom, in no particular order.
1.Voldemort 2.Coleen lamb 3.Harry Potter 4.Ron Weasly
5.Hermione Granger 6.Fred Weasly 7.Patroculus Nott 8.Scorpius Malfoy
9.Aunt Petuna 10.Miss Figg 11.Stan Shunpike 12.The Sorting Hat
1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Fred/Stan No I haven't... I don't really see how it could happen but it might be interesting.
2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Not realloy. I love redheads but Ron's overall attitude is a major turn-off .
3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
The Sorting Hat got Scorpius Malfoy pregant...? WTF! O_o That's... not possible. Even for wiizards. And now I'm disturbed.
4. Can you recall any fics about Nine?
Yes actually. Several really good ones i.e An Aunt's Love
5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?
I suppose. You don't really see Collen Lamb a lot so it's up to the author to imagine her personnality (besides the fact that she's shy) so I guess it's possible for her to be with Fred.
6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Why?
Hermione/Petunia Dursley VS Hermione/Miss Figg Both are distrbing to the extreme but I guess I'd pick HErmione with aunt Petunia cuz you know, Petunia's not like 80...
7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
Well... We don't really know PAtroculus Nott so possible reactions are: 1. WTF!! O_O 2. YES! YOU GO GIRL! or 3. DAMN! I KNEW we should have let up on the crucios a bit.
8. Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
Harry has never been shown love by the Dursleys so when he goes to be babysat by Miss Figg for the first time, he cannot help but pledge his undying love to her and she, seduced by his childish innocence, tries her best, but fails to subdue the growing attraction she feels for the green-eyed boy. lol (Ewwww)
9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
If there is I havn't seen it yet... blinks Bu compared to some of the stuff I've crossed on FFNet, I wouldn't be shocked.
10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
Ascending Darkness (Sorting Hat sees into a tortures/abused Patroculus Nott's mind and sees his drab and dark future as a Deatheater before placing him in Slytherin.)
11. If you wrote a songfic about Eight, what song would you choose?
"I Feel Pretty" I don't know... lol. We don't really know anything about him do we?
12. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?
Rape fic, innapropriate use of inanimate (sentient) objects
13. When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Ummm. 10 minutes ago?
14. "(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (7) runs off with (4). (1), brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3).”
Voldemort and Patroculus Nott are in a happy relashionship until Nott runs off with Ron weasly. Voldemort, brokenhearted, has a hot one-night stand with Stan Shunpike and a brief unhappy affair with the Sorting Hat then follows the wise advice of Hermione Granger and finds true love with HARRY POTTER!?
Now I'm not sure if I'm more disturbed because a) read the above summary and tell me what you think... or b) It actually makes SENSE!? Kinda... You'd have to use an aging postion, a time-turner, a few illegal spells cough imperiuscough and have such add in such an awesome orgasm you'd forget the Sorting Hat is NOT as wash-cloth but it could work... maybe...
God gives man instincts,
The Devil (Al Pacino) - The Devil's Advocate
So, let me get this straight," Ron scratched his head and narrowed his eyes at Harry, whom was seated in the armchair across from himself and Hermione. "You’re a seer, but you didn't get discovered early on because your parents were in hiding, you gave that reading on me earlier on complete accident and it may not even happen, you speak with the Goddess of Chaos and Destruction regularly, and no one can read your mind because a goddess gave you a special power I reckon no one has ever heard of?"
"Sounds about right, yeah." Harry winced and looked down at his hands. There was a silence for a moment and he could feel his friends’ eyes burrowing into him.
"Well, as long as it wasn't something unusual." said Hermione.
"Yeah," joined in Ron, "we'd have been worried if it was something weird."
Chaos: Destruction: My work here is done by: TheBonnie
If you can't beat them, confuse them then run away.
"With God and black magic on my side, I can't lose!"
Adrienne, quoting MTV.
Prisoner: I've heard stories about the Black Pearl...they leave no survivors.
Professor Lupin: Severus, don't be a fool.
"No, mademoiselle, I would not like to see the childrens menu. I have no doubt that the children's menu itself tastes better than the meals on it"
If homosexuality is a disease, let's all call in queer to work: "Hello. Can't work today, still queer."
"Casualties many; Percentage of dead not known; Combat efficiency; we are winning."
"Oops. My sword slipped."
Hiei, destroying the Chapter Black video.
"YUSUKE YOU IDIOT! So tough! For freakin' BAD-Ass... AND YOU DIE IN TRAFFIC! That's a wimps death! I didn't raise no WIMP! moron."
Yusuke's caring mother, Atsuko.
"I don't want a shot! I don't want a shot!" cowers behind Chichi
"We all have sufficient strength to endure the misfortunes of others."
-François, duc de La Rochefoucauld
Show me a woman who doesn't feel guilty and I'll show you a man.
--Fear of Flying
Fiction reveals the truth that reality distorts
Want. Take. Have
"If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my children may have peace,"
"There's no such thing as a stupid question. (someone asks question) I stand corrected."
"Disturbing? Who am I disturbing? This is a coma ward! Don't you WANT them to wake up?"
"No, I don't have a gambling problem. I'm winning, and winning is not a problem. That's like saying Michael Jordan has a basketball problem, or Def Leppard has an awesomeness problem."
Earl (My Name is Earl)
“They’re there for us to try and overcome.
~Dreaming-of-A-Nightmare's best friend, Laur-Bear (said at 1:00 a.m. on Friday, August 15th)
There's much more. There's all that goes beyond- all that is Elsewhere- and all that goes back, and back, and back.- Lois Lowry (the Giver)
-I don't see you making yourself useful. Why don't you go fetch a space heater or something?
-Go fetch a space heater. I'm not a St. Bernard.
-Edward Cullen and Jacob Black. Eclipse p. 489.
-You know Jacob, if it weren't for the fact that we're natural ennemies and that you're trying to steal away the reason for my existance, I might actually like you.
-Maybe... if you weren't a disgusting vampire who was planning to suck the life out of the girl that I love... well, no, not even then.
Edward Cullen and Jacob Black. Eclipse p.503.
"I made the cowardly lion look like the terminator."
"How..." he cleared his throat as he realised it had came out as a whimper, “How painful?"
"Two words," Naruto growled, freeing his legs from the blanket, "Painful."
Sasuke’s eyes sought the door as she walked closer.
"And the other one?"
Her mouth suddenly appeared right next to his ear, the last word only breathed.
"We are born wet, naked, and hungry. Then things get worse. ~LIFE IS THE MOST DANGEROUS THING ON EARTH, NO ONE HAS SURVIVED~" - I don't remember where I found this.
"Everything is always okay in the end. If it's not okay, then it's not the end.
-I don't know
" The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on."
- Robert Bloch (I agree! Evil little sisters mumbles)
"Time is a great teacher, unfortunately it kills all of its pupils."
-Louis Hector Berlioz
(Fiona) - If God had wanted Man to fly, he would have given us feathers.
(Mark) - If God had wanted Man to go on water, he would have given us fins and a tail.
Touching Wild Horses
Before you critizise someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you critisize them, you're a mile away and have their shoes. ~Frieda Norris
Fallen leaves can never return to where they came from. That's why they're so beautiful. ~Anonymous
It is a scientifically proven fact that love comes from the same part of the brain as hunger and thirst. It is also a well known fact that most of the worlds population is starving. ~Anonymous
The questions we may never answer or avoid may be the very reason we live - to prove that fate is what we make of it, to prove that the end is not near until we decide not to continue. ~Anonymous
It matters little how we die, so long as we die better men than we imagined we could be - and no worse than we feared. ~Drago Museveni
I don't lie. I carefully ommit and selection the truth.
There may be plenty of fish in the sea, Wufei, but they are not all created equal. That’s why men risk their lives to fish Alaskan Salmon, and Tuna comes in a can.
-Trowa Barton, Carpe Diem (a fic from Dentelle-noir)
I frankly felt like the reception we received on the way in from the airport was very warm and hospitable. And I want to thank the Canadian people who came out to wave -- with all five fingers -- for their hospitality.
Britain has invented a new missile. It's called the civil servant - it doesn't work and it can't be fired.
Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
I dropped the shield, ran to the door and gave the secret, prearranged signal for Loor to do her thing.
"Open the damn door!" I yelled as loud as I could. How's that for a secret signal.
Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.
-- Mae West
Sometimes I feel like the whole world's against me. Then I remember that that isn't true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.
"So in the end, my girlfriend became my archenemy, my archenemy became my best friend, and my best friend became my girlfriend. But hey, that's high school." ~Will Stronghold from Sky High
Gaara secretly believed that Shukaku was a closet romantic. ~Behind the Sun by QueenTigris
"There's a fine line between insomnia and insanity." ~CollaneR
“RikuyougotmepregnantandnowI’mgoingtohaveababyandit’syourfaultsotakeresponsibility!” ~ 9-year-old Sora to Riku after Selphie told him where babies come from (which she said was when people 'kiss and stuff' )
“It was an idiotic joke,” Gaara told Naruto bitterly. “It came from me. Did you really expect it to be genius?” Naruto asked with a smile. ~ A Blessing by thattreevesgirl
"One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject." ~Unknown
"Oops, I appear to have fallen on your lips." ~Unknown, but that's genius as hell. I have got to use that sometime!
“Hey baby, I noticed you noticing me, and I just wanted to put you on notice that I noticed you, too.” ~Will Smith, The Fresh Price of Bel-Air
Pudding: "Wh-who are you?" Kisshu: "I am... an angel." Pudding: "That's a lie! Angels don't have evil faces like that!" Kisshu: " =.= " ~Tokyo Mew Mew (episode 7)
Jack: "...Why is the rum gone?" Elizabeth: "One: it is a vile drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels. And two: that signal is over a thousand feet high; the entire Royal Navy is out looking for me; do you really think there is even the slightest chance they won't see it?!" Jack: "Yes, but why is the rum gone?" ~Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl
“Keh! I’m not saying she’s a bad Kage,” Naruto shot defensively, “She’s just a psycho nutter.” ~Naruto talking about Tsunade in Optimism by torture-insanity
“You are going to die a virgin!” ~Shukaku to Gaara in Trapped in Closet: No ramen, believe it! by Flyflew
When he said 'hot,' of course, he didn't mean hot like 'oh, these noodles sure are hot.' Or even 'damn, it sure is hot today.' No, he meant hot like 'wishing the right amount of chakra could destroy the sun because it's melting off my face and I think I'm going to die a very dry and lonely death.' ~Desert Storm by pellaz
"Hear my faith, I shall show eternal loyalty towards your soul." ~Forgot, sorry. But I love that quote
"Call me that one more time... and I won’t hesitate to scrape out your insides with a rusty soup spoon." ~Naruto to Sasuke referring to the nickname 'dobe' in Never Bet Against A Lucky Bastard by Queen Tigris
“Naruto,” Sasuke said after a bit. “I know you’re not gay. What I do know, however, is how extremely easy it is to mess with you.” ~Reasonable Madness by Silentz
'A small chuckle broke out, before Sasuke restrained himself. “That, my friend, was a serious burn. Even I felt the heat.” ' ~Reasonable Madness by Silentz
"Gaara...its snow. I swear it won't hurt you." ~Naruto from Snow Day by cneko2
Gaara: "...I'm teaching her how to write 'ai' tomorrow if it kills me." Naruto: "Huh? Why?" Gaara: "Hearts," he said with conviction, "are not manly." ~from Snow Day by cneko2
Then Gaara blushed. ‘HELL MUST HAVE FROZE!!’ ~Great Kazekage! by xxtaragonxx
'Breathing was overrated, after all. ' ~For the love of the Hat! by Konpeitou
'Internal dilemma: to move or not to move? Lose the happy hugging feeling or lose all feeling in his legs? Huh…' ~For the love of the Hat! by Konpeitou'
“I’m so glad you’ve been paying attention, Axel.” Zexion said in monotone. “Well, you know, I always pa-- OMG IT’S SOMETHING SHINY!” Axel ran off quickly in a different direction.' ~Out of Context by YourConscience813
“Yes. Bastardly things. Like, you know, practicing his glare, growling, scaring small children, stealing Christmas from the Whos, the usual.” ~Naruto explaining Sasuke's behavior to Sakura in Baby Blues by blizzie8826
"Are you insane?!" "Only on days that end with 'y'." ~Unknown, but that's funny as hell for obvious reasons
"I was in the park, staring and wondering why the Frisbees were getting bigger. Then, it hit me." ~Unknown, but i've seen it on a t-shirt
"I dream in darkness, I sleep to die. Erase the silence, erase my life. Our burning ashes, blacken the day. A world of nothingness, blow me alway." ~i forget, sorry...
"Get inside my mouth if you want to live." ~that one pellucan from Finding Nemo...
"Cripes, Ichigo, if you want another kiss just ask." ~Kisshu to Ichigo from Tokyo Mew Mew
"If the other side is greener... fertilize." ~Uknown
"I have very little patience and I can't hardly wait to get some more!" ~Uknown
"If yaoi is a sin, then won't hell be one mass orgy?" ~Unknown
"Stupid is as stupid does." ~Forrest Gump
"...The universe just loves proving me wrong, doesn't it?" ~Sokka from Avatar: The Last Airbender (season 3, episode 1: The Awakening)
"I Became Insane with Long Intervals of Horrible Sanity." ~Edgar Allan Poe
"Somehow, I feel confused about eating myself." ~Naruto (episode 159)
"Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid." ~Jack Sparrow, POTC 1 (and pretty much anything else he says...)
"We have just witnessed a classic example of what I like to call 'misdirected rage.' I believe the technical term is 'being an ass.'" ~Shigure from Fruits Basket
(Claire)- Did you know that Vanessa went to her friend's house and got drunk?
(Theo)- So she finally gave into the pressure.
(Claire)- What pressure?
(Theo)- By seing you, mom and dad, and everything you've fufilled, everyone expects us to do better. Since there is no better, we can only do worse.
-The Cosby show.
My sources are unreliable, but their information is fascinating.
Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.
You know what charm is: a way of getting the answer yes without having asked any clear question.
There cannot be a crisis this week; my schedule is already full.
You'd think getting chopped up into a million pieces and cast into the darkest part of the Underworld would give him a subtle clue that nobody wanted him around. But no.
-Percy Jackson (The Sea of Monsters)
(Percy)- Well, we kind of tried to kill each other in a duel to the death.
(Hermes)- I see. You tried the diplomatic approach.
-Percy Jackson and Hermes God of Thieves
(The Sea of Monsters)
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams
Do or do not. There is no 'try'.
If at first you don't succed, destroy all evidence that you tried. If at first you do succed, try not to look too astonished.
Be yourself-everybody else is taken.
How sweet of you to offer your opinion. Now watch as I totally disregard it.
-House, Pills, shots and a broken piano (House MD fic)
I'm a dishonest man. Honestly. It's the honest ones you have to watch out for.
I know as much of games as hugs and puppies, and care for them even less.
I'm always in shit, it's just the depth that varies.
If something can go wrong then it will do so, usually in the worst way possible. If nothing can go wrong, it will anyways. If everything seems to be going right, then you are obviously overlooking something.
He resisted asking the question for as long as he could, knowing it wasn't even in the same country as politically correct, but in the end it popped out under its own volition. "How did you die?"
Duo Maxwell (Tomb of Memory by hoshi-tachi)(wich STILL ISN'T UPDATED!! GRR!)
"I don't know the key to success but I know the key to failure is trying to please everybody."
If you're going to do something wrong, at least enjoy it.
-Leo C. Rosten
"People always say life's not fair. But think of how much worse it would be if life was fair, and all the awful things that happend to us happend because we actualy deserve them. I for one take great comfort in the completly impersonal hostility of the universe..."
"A photogragh is my way of saying that you were important enough that I paused my world to stop and watch."
- Jodi Picoult
"Those who believe in telekenisis, raise my hand."
-I don't know
"You know you need to get some sleep when the sheep you're counting are running into the fence."
-Duo Maxwell (?)
"Don't make me come down there!"
"Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away."
-Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
If you can't convince them, confuse them.
-Harry S Truman
Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecst and economists?
Speak the truth but leave immediately after.
My parents kept aking how school was. It's like saying, '' How was that drive-by shooting?'' You don't care how it was, you're lucky to have gotten out alive!
"When they took the Fourth Amendment, I was silent because I don’t deal drugs. When they took the Sixth Amendment, I kept quiet because I know I’m innocent. When they took the Second Amendment, I said nothing because I don’t own a gun. Now they’ve come for the First Amendment, and I can’t say anything at all."
-Tim Freeman (reminds me of a child's story book I read with the same moral)
If you can't change it, don't worry about it. If you can change it, then just fix it.
Be good, and if you can't be good, be good at it."
-I. Sally Wilde, AKA- Mom. 2007, Juneish.
"I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three."
"It's the Dark that makes the Light seem brighter."
--Elizabeth Dobbs: 5ive Girls (and the Light that makes the Dark seem darker)
"The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it's their fault."
"..we may experience some slight turbulence, and then- explode."
"Though we adore them individually, as a group we agree that they're rather stupid."
"Not all who wander are lost."
"The world is a dangerous place to live; not just because of the people who are evil, but because of the people that don't do anything about it."
"I reject your reality, and substitute my own."
"'Tell me one last thing," said Harry. "Is this real? Or has this been happening inside my head?" Dumbledore beamed at him, and his voice sounded loud and strong in Harry's ears even though the bright mist was descending again, obscuring his figure. "Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?'"
-Albus Dumbledore and Harry page 723, 'Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows'.
"The darkest hour is just before the dawn."
"You mock me because I am different. I mock you because you are all the same."
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling but rising every time we fall."
"I'm not racist, I hate everyone."
Avery Clark, Parkside H.S., room 105, Nov. 19, 2007.
"Diplomacy is the art of saying 'nice doggy' until you can find a rock."
"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats."
- Albert Schweitzer.
A free society is a place where it's safe to be unpopular. (Here here!)
I disapprove of what you say, but will defend to the death your right to say it.
"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, prepare to die."
-Klingon Proverb, Star Trek
If the whole world depends on today's youth, I can't see the world lasting another 100 years. (lol. That sounds like somehing my dad would say)
"Don't worry. I can see them, too. You're just as sane as I am."
-Luna "Loony" Lovegood, Harry Potter (OotP Film)
I had become one with the plumbing. (The context makes it super-funny)
-Percy Jackson and the Olympians (LT)
You know. Prince Charming isn't all that great. He screwed with Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Belle, The Little Mermaid and countless others. Do you think he's a pimp? (LOL )
-Duo Maxwell (a fanfic I read)
The world has to suck otherwise we would all fall off.
High heels are a man's invention to prevent women from running away.
-I don't know
(My amazing friend-I'm such a suck up-Pearledtears told it to me GO READ HER FIC (Electricity) IT'S AMAZING and on my favs lol XD)
-Which pants do you think I should wear to go hunting?
-Imagine you're a deer. You're prancing along in the forest and you get a little thirsty so you put your little deer lips to a brook to drink some water... then BAM! smacks forehead A fucking ball rips your fucking head off and you're brain's lying in little bloody pieces on the ground! Do you really care about the pants on the guy that fucking killed you!?
-Conversation between Vinny and Lisa in ''My Cousin Vinny'' (super funny... Go watch.)
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
- HL Mencken
Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from a religious conviction.
- Blaise Pascal (1623 - 1662)
This is the crack team that foils my every plot! I am deeply shamed.
When someone tells you nothing is impossible, ask him to dribble a football.
Once I had a handle on life; then it broke
Hi….Welcome……Please don't kill me.
So he's a humanitarian bomber.
Mr. Freeman: Why not spend that time on art: painting, sculpting, charcoal, pastel, oils? Are words or numbers more important than images? Does algebra move you to tears? (Hands raise, thinking he wants answers.)
Normal is just a setting on your dryer.
I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that I failed math, history and english. The good news is that I'm out of bad news.
--Zack, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody
Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
'Don't laugh in the face of death. It won't appreciate your sense of humor.'
Words can't hurt you unless the person saying them writes them on an anvil and drops it on your head.
"Your halo's falling down."
"I write for the same reason I breathe - because if I didn't, I would die."
I am more afraid of an army of 100 sheep led by a lion than of 100 lions led by a sheep.
Always plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.
He was so narrow-minded that he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.
People are very open-minded about new things - as long as they are exactly like the old ones.
"Luck is my middle name," Rincewind indisctincly. "Mind you my first name is Bad."
Whoever said sunshine brings happiness never danced in the pouring rain.
Books are always better than real, live boyfriends any day of the week. They don't talk back and they're always there for you. You can have as many of them as you want and they won't complain.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?
The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his.
" Veni Vidi Vici"
"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later. "
~ Mitch Hedberg
"The supreme irony of life is that hardly anyone gets out of it alive."
"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."
Magic: Doing the same thing over and over again and obtaining different results.
"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me."
~Hunter S. Thompson
"I really don't trust a sane person."
"...it takes quite a lot of good deeds to make people love you. But it only takes one lousy error for them to hate you." -authoress-next-door
"Because she'd rather you become one of the eternal damned than get married."
-edward cullen, new moon
"...why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer? ... ... because it feels so good when I stop."
-meredith grey, grey's anatomy
"If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure?"
~ Harry Shearer
"Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat."
... fiction never exceeds the reach of the writer’s courage.
- Dorothy Allison
... in nine out of ten cases the original wish to write is the wish to make oneself felt. The non-essential writer never gets past that wish.
- Elizabeth Bowen
... no writing is a waste of time,—no creative work where the feelings, the imagination, the intelligence must work.
- Brenda Ueland
... writing is not a performance but a generosity.
- Brenda Ueland
A good writer does not receive anywhere near the number of poison-pen letters that is commonly assumed. Among a hundred jackasses there are not ten who will admit to being jackasses, and at most one who will put it in writing.
- Karl Kraus
A writer is unfair to himself when he is unable to be hard on himself.
- Marianne Moore
A writer never reads his work. For him, it is the unreadable, a secret, and he cannot remain face to face with it. A secret, because he is separated from it. -
And if nobody reads me, shall I have wasted my time, when I have beguiled so many idle hours with such pleasant and profitable reflections?
- Michel de Montaigne
The public is the only critic whose opinion is worth anything at all.
- Mark Twain
All our lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher. -Ambrose Bierce
Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes. -Walt Whitman
Acting provides the fulfillment of never being fulfilled. You're never as good as you'd like to be. So there's always something to hope for. -Washington Irving
Pay no attention to what the critics say; there has never been set up a statue in honor of a critic.
- Jean Sibelius
"What a wonderful thing it is to do nothing at all, and after having done so, to rest."
"This is how the world ends, not with a bang, but a wimper"
Confronted by an absolutely infuriating review it is sometimes helpful for the victim to do a little personal research on the critic. Is there any truth to the rumor that he had no formal education beyond the age of eleven? In any event, is he able to construct a simple English sentence? Do his participles dangle? When moved to lyricism does he write 'I had a fun time'? Was he ever arrested for burglary? I don't know that you will prove anything this way, but it is perfectly harmless and quite soothing.
- Jean Kerr
It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms; the great devotions; and spends himself in a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.
- Franklin Roosevelt
Do not put statements in the negative form. And don't start sentences with a conjunction. If you reread your work, you will find on rereading that a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing. Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do. Unqualified superlatives are the worst of all. If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is. Last, but not least, avoid cliches like the plague.
- William Safire
My most important piece of advice to all you would-be writers: when you write, try to leave out all the parts readers skip.
- Elmore Leonard
The problem with America is stupidity. I'm not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don't we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it's limits" (Albert Einstein)
"We guarantee that your hair will be 4x thicker in just 15 seconds, and when you come for your money back guarantee, we're gone just like your hair!"
"All heros are suicidal."
"I'm not lazy, I'm just energetically handicapped. "
"I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals, it's because I hate plants." (found this one on a profile here. Sorry for stealing :P )
"Kinda hard not to be a smartass when you're talking to dumbasses all the time."
"Big Bang Theory: In the beginning there was nothing... which exploded."
"Atheism: The belief that there was nothing and nothing happened to nothing and then nothing magically exploded for no reason, creating everything and then a bunch of everything magically rearranged itself for no reason what so ever into self-replicating bits which turned into dinosaurs. Makes perfect sense."
"Cancer: nature's way of telling people to stop screwing with radiation."
If this is what normal people had to deal with everyday, he'd take being a murdering pyschopath anytime.
Dealing with love was a pain in the ass.
-Gaara, The Great Romantic by: MogTheGnome
Silence is Golden, duct-tape is Silver
"I'm not Crazy. I'm psycotic. There's a difference."
"when you're blue, a good friend will ask what's wrong. A true friend will try to dislodge what's chocking you."
"When you get thrown in jail, a good friend will come bail you out. A true friend will be in there with you going "Damn, we f--d up."
"A good friend will help you up when you fall. A true friend will laugh at you and then trip you again."
"A good friend will keep you secrets when you ask them too. A true friend will keep their mouths shut without you asking them."
"There's nothing that can't be fixed with: ducttape, chocolate, or by running it over."
"My attention span is just short enough to annoy you and ignore you all at the same time. (and if all else fails... Blow it up!)"
I'm awesome. Agree or die.
"You know you're crazy when you know the Men in white by name."
"An essay is an attempt to explain something that could have been said in two sentences"
"Life isn't passing me by. It's trying to run me over."
"your mum is so fat that when God said 'let there be light' she had to move"
"One day, little Johny was out with his mum when he asked 'mum, is God male or female?' she replied, 'I suppose God's both dear.' a bit later he asked 'mum, is got black or white?' again she replied 'God's both dear.' Johny was now confused but he came back a bit later and asked 'mum, is God gay or straight?' his mum was now the one to be confused before answering 'well... I suppose God's both dear.' Little Johny's face lights up before he asks 'Mum, is God Michael Jackson?"
If you get up one more time than you fall,
God is cruel – sometimes he makes you live.
YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN 2008 WHEN...
1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years
3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or my space
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing
the buttons on the TV
6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.
11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.
12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did
Forgive these broken wings
That cannot reach the sky.
I wanted to take you there
But I cannot fly so,
Soar, soar my love,
To the feartest reaches of paradise
And forgive these broken wings
That demand I say good-bye.
- Sub Rosa by Kayura Sanada (pen-name on FFNet)
Some say the world will end in fire, others say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire, I hold with those who favour fire.
But if it had to perish twice, I think I know enough of hate
To say that of destructive ice is also great and would suffice.
-Fire and Ice by Robert Frost
Nature's first green is gold, her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower, but only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf, so Eden sank in grief.
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.
-Nothing gold can stay by Robert Frost
Only when the last river will be poisoned,
Only when the last fish will be dead,
Only when the last tree will be cut down,
Only then will we know that money cannot be eaten.
-I don't know.
Give me a humble heart that I may know,
-A Nurse's Prayer, by: Alwin Law
There are ideas ringing in my mind
Yet there are no words to make them materialize
I want to make them understand
To make them see my heart
The picturesque scene portrayed in the theatre of my mind
Is a play that only I could see
Because the curtains are closed
The words are foreign
Only I could understand
The theatre in my mind.
The Script Writer- Unknown
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, WeaselChick, Celyna, ShadowShapeshifterAndHerCat, Sanoon, Lord Cargyle, Silverlycan, FamilyRose, Kirallie,Cristalake,
98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who haven't, copy & paste this in your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are unconcerned by the dismal state of their education, or the fact that their fanfiction is raping the English language. If you're part of the five percent of fanfiction writers/readers who do care about such things, cut and paste this, and then leave reviews for those poor souls who know not what they do.
97 percent of teens would die if Abercrombie, Aeropostale, Hollister, Victoria's Secret, and American Eagle said it wasn't cool to breath. If you're the 3 percent that would go into hysteric fits of laughter, copy and paste this to your profile. (I probably wouldn't even know about it)
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.
If when people call you a bitch you think 'a bitch is a dog, a dog is an animal, animals are natural, natural things are from nature, nature is like trees, trees are like flowers, flowers are pretty so you just called me pretty, thanks!' copy this into your profile.
If you think all the good ones are either married, gay, or fictional creatures coughEdwardcough, copy and paste this to your profile.
If Bella leaves Edward in Breaking Dawn, then I'm literally going to hurt something. No offense to all you Jacob loving fans. I mean, I like Jacob to. He's a great character, but Edward and Bella are meant to be!
I'm sort of afraid for the twilight movie. I swear, if any of them have even the slightest hint of a fang, I'm going to punch my tv
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile
If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight that whenever you hear thunder you think of vampires playing baseball.
I'm sort of afraid for the twilight movie. I swear, if any of them have even the slightest hint of a fang, I'm going to punch my tv
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile
If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight that whenever you hear thunder you think of vampires playing baseball.
If you went to sleep at around 2 am reading Twilight and/or New Moon, copy and pastes this onto your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.
If you've ever walked into a wall before copy this into your pro
You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volterra" to your computer's dictionary.
If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!
If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.
If someone tells you they know someone named Edward you think "Vampire" C&P
If you think that all other vampire stories are 'fakes' after you've read Twilight C&P
If you ever collapsed with laughter and couldnt get back up C&P
If you think the Cullens should have their own theme music :o) Copy this to your Profile
PLEASE READ WHAT'S UNDER THIS!! It's actually important.
1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.
If you support gay marriage and want to show it, paste this into your profile.
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
RE-POST THIS IF YOU THINK HOMOPHOBIA IS WRONG! pLEASE DO YOUR PART TO END IT...
I'm INTO THEATRE & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
Stereotypes suck! Copy, paste & add to your profile to help get rid of it!
You know what Mommy
You went to the doctor today.
I can hear that doctor again.
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
If you're against abortion, re-post this
If you've ever forgotten your own name while introducing yourself copy and paste this into your profile.
My name is Sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home.
When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall.
I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry.
He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate.
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy,
Her name was Auroura
Her dad was a drunk
Her only friend
She always talked to it
Until her parents
A bruise on her leg
But she grabs her bear
She sits in the corner
Such a bad life
Then one night
Then her mom suddenly
She thrusted the blade
The mom walked out
Police showed up
One officer slowly
It must have been bad
Child abuse, MAKE IT STOP!
Repost this if you are against child abuse
If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal
pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a
rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't
mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer
be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling
was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool! Poor egsnlinh taeerchs. Teher geos tier lfie's wrok.
If you could read that put it in your profile
To Every Guy:
To every guy that's said, "Sex CAN wait
...This one bulletin is for you...
Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore... And because of this, there are not many left out there...
We interrupt this profile for an important message to one who has passed on. He will be remembered dearly.
OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense,who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion, or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
A moment of silence.
REMEMBER WHEN ..
Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now
You're a 90's kid if:
You can finish this 'ice ice _'
Hi, my name is Kazu. I like Writing and I like Athletics. I am running down the road I suddenly tripped over. I come home with a scatch on my knee. My mummy begins to worry. I tell her I am fine. She sighs and says ok. I am at school. When suddenly I fall and hit a tree. I am sent to the sickbay. Then I am sent home. Mummy takes me to the doctors. The doctors tell mummy something. Mummy starts to cry. I tell her it's ok. I'm not going to die. She tells me I am starting. Starting to be slower. I don't know what it means. But I have become sick. I tell mummy it's ok. I will become better. Mummy starts to cry. Do I have cancer? Mummy says no. Then what do I suppose. As a year had past. I struggle to walk. My speech is getting slower. It's hard for me to talk. My friends like to help me. My classmates like to run. But I have to sit down. And watch them have fun. Then one day my teacher. Comes to see mummy.Daddy comes out. And starts to get all snotty. The teacher tells my parents. I can no longer go to school.My motion is too slow. I ask the teacher slowly. I am sorry I am useless. I start to cry and beg her. I want to go to school. The teacher gives a smile. And tells me she is sorry. The school cant really help me. The words were so cruel. The day I had to leave. My friends and classmates cried. The boys upon the windows. Wave to me goodbye. I smile and sit in the car. I am taken to a school. A school with special people. Just like me and you. I start to have some fun. I made a lot of friends. As many years passed again. I talk too slow to understand. I cannot run anymore. And I struggle to even stand. I cannot write in my diary. My motion is too slow. Then one day I am sent. To the hospital again. Now many years have passed. I lie in a warm bed. I cannot move my body. I cannot move again. I talk very slowly. I cannot move my head. My mummy sits there crying. My daddy looks depressed. I ask my mummy sadly. Am I going to die. My mother holds my hand. Yells and starts to cry.
A few more years later.
I have to shut my eyes. I cannot talk or move. I seem to have died.
Copy and Paste this story about Kazu who was diagnosed with a rare uncurable disease, Spinocerebellar Degeneration, in your profile. This disease causes a failure of muscle control in their arms and legs, resulting in a lack of balance and coordination or a disturbance of gait. Support and send the message worldwide.
pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer.
If you have ever had done something or said something that made perfect sense to your real friends and only caused your "peers" to look at you strangely and roll their eyes, copy and paste this into your profile. (we talk in code. no one knows what we're saying. sometimes I do this with my siblings instead, and then even my freinds don't get it. XDD)
Congratulations on making it to the bottom of my page, wasn't that a lot of scrolling? Here, have a cookie!
(If you actually read all of that, PM/IM me and I'll send you a cake!)
8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.
9. The things that come to those who wait, will be the things left by those who got there first.
10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.
11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
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