Malum
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Joined 09-08-07, id: 1371772, Profile Updated: 02-24-08
Author has written 3 stories for TV Commercials.

Wow...they really just let you go to it here, don't they? Ah... I suppose the easiest way to go about this is to put up some FAQs. Right then.

WHAT'S YOUR NAME?: My name is irrelevant, but you can call me Malum.

WHAT'S YOUR GENDER?: I'm a woman.

WHERE ARE YOU?: I live in a dorm in a place that is much more of Southern United States than I would like it to be. This does not mean that I am anti-American, only that I wish to live somewhere else.

HOW OLD ARE YOU?: Age is a box (bonus points to you if you can tell me what book that came from).

LIKES?: Yes

DISLIKES?: That too.

WHAT'S YOUR CURRENT OCCUPATION?: I'm a student at the university level.

OH COOL! WHAT'S YOUR MAJOR?: I'm double majoring in English Literature and Global Studies Chinese focus.

...WOW...WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH THAT?: Graduate.

WHAT KINDA THINGS DO YOU LIKE TO WRITE?: I write pretty crappy things. I don't write poetry unless forced. I like humour.

SO WHAT ELSE DO YOU DO?: I take pictures. I have a deviantART account, and bonus points if you can find it.

WHAT'S WITH "BONUS POINTS"?: For every review you give me, I'll give you 1 point. If the review is a constructive review or very funny, you'll get 3 bonus points. If you do the various other things I mention, you'll get varying amounts of bonus points. Finally, if you get enough points, you can send away for a very special Malum Cookie.

(NOTE: Points only redeemable if submitted in writing at least 5 weeks before time of intended use. Malum reserves the right to eliminate points or Malum Cookies at any time. Please allow 8-45 years for delivery.)

WHERE ARE MY KEYS?: I don't know. Super bonus points if you know where mine are, though.

ARE YOU CRAZY?: Not certifiably...yet.

ARE YOU DEAD: Most of the time.

WAIT, IF YOU'RE DEAD, HOW CAN WE BE HAVING THIS CONVERSATION?: We can't.

BUT...YOU JUST SAID...: I know.

And that's pretty much me. I'm a tad more problematic, though. Just ask my roommate. Or my friends. Or my doctors. Or...anyone really.

Hade!

Blue by MizzMarvel reviews
Sixteen year old Jeff Schafer returns to Stoneybrook under less than happy circumstances, and discovers a few things about himself. SLASH if you don't like it, don't read, don't review. Newly Updated, Chapter 13.
Baby Sitters Club - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 62,895 - Reviews: 352 - Favs: 153 - Follows: 121 - Updated: 11/15/2009 - Published: 5/23/2004
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Activio reviews
I should be studying, I should be studying" 4 bonus points if you get this . Rated K for weirdness, and stuck in the "Drama" genre because there is nothing more dramatic than irregularity.
TV Commercials - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 452 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 3/8/2009 - Complete
PSAs Throughout Time reviews
NOT INTENDED TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY! These are just some things that I come up with randomly, especially in class. Don't expect these to be connected, they are only grouped together because they will all be faux-PSAs if that's even a word . Enjoy!
TV Commercials - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 538 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 3/6/2008
Home Insurance reviews
It's 2AM, and you're flipping through TV. What do you come across? A commercial for house insurance!
TV Commercials - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 501 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/24/2008 - Complete