Author has written 15 stories for Twilight, and Hobbit.
2016: I'm obviously not on here anymore, nor interested in any of these stories anymore. I've grown as a writer and a person, and this just is not me anymore. Sorry for anyone that was waiting for more, it's not coming. However, I will leave these up because I know people enjoyed them, and I think being able to look back at where you came from to where you are now is important. Take care, everyone!
If you are here, you are either
A) extremely bored
B) extremely curious about that crazy person whose stories you like
C) a stalker of the scary variety
D) a stalker of the friendly variety (aka: SOMEONE I KNOW SOMEWHAT WELL)
E) other/none of the above/lost/confused
MY SONG OF THE MOMENT: Song of the Lonely Mountain - The Hobbit Soundtrack. (Or, equally loved but much shorter, is Far Over the Misty Mountains with the dwarf cast and Richard Armitage's gorgeous voice that sends chills to all the way down to my toes...)
TO ALL MY READERS (11/12/11): I apologize for not having updated in ages. RL has been incredibly overwhelming and when I do have spare time I tend to just zonk out in my bed or on the couch doing basically nothing of incredible effort. Don't worry, I'm not abandoning any stories, and I have been working on them. For LLS, the next chapter is partially written (and has been rewritten so many times I've lost count) and as for B&D, Irritable Grizzzly and I have sketched out the next chapter and she's been working on her part. I'll update when I can, but I suggest not expecting anything until mid-December or later. I hope you understand and I thank you all for your patience. (EDIT: 4/11/12 - I'm still here. Two and a half more weeks of school before summer, and hopefully some serious downtime that includes writing for you all. Three English classes plus three Education classes plus two jobs... Yeah. I'm eager for summer. And writing. EDIT AGAIN: 3/7/13 - I really do mean it when I say I'm not going to abandon anything. I promise. But right now is Student Teaching and I'm finishing up my Teaching Event which means my PACT is due in two weeks plus I'm taking FOUR COLLEGE CLASSES LIKE SOME CRAZY PERSON ON TOP OF THAT and I'm changing my whole plans for the future that I had in mind which is exciting but exhausting and I don't get a spring break and I graduate the first week of May and omfg LIFE.)
I solemnly swear that Fred never died and George wears blue boxers! I am a member of the Twin Exchange.
Pixie Dust Lovers Blog - It's like flying off to Neverland. Only instead of Peter Pan, we have Assward. Like it's a competition over who's better?
I just passed the CSET: English - all four subtests in one go... first time. Like a boss...
I live in the sunny state of California. But before you start thinking sunny beaches and movie stars (I wish), let me remind you of this little place squished between the mountains...it's called the Central Valley. In other words, Boring Central. Or the Dent. I live in the little vineyard-surrounded town of Lodi. About fifteen minutes away from Stockton, the second most crime rated place in CA. Or something or other like that. The two are complete opposites, which you would know if you lived in the area.
Disclaimer for All my Works: Anything that I write on here that is recognizable as a published, copyrighted work is not mine, I'm just messing around with it. On the flip side, all unrecognizable characters/plots/etc ARE mine. The end. Nothing to add.
The Princess Bride - "Inconceivable!"; "Yes, you're very smart, now shut up." ; "Is this a kissing book?" Wizard of Oz - "If I only had a brain!" The Lord of the Rings (though it doesn't exactly follow the books...) - "You can keep your nasty chips!" Dances With Wolves - "It was only my idea to steal the horse. Not to fall." The Bourne Movies -"You have ID?" "Not really." The Pirates of the Carribean - "I got a jar of dirt, I got a jar of dirt!" Gone in 60 Seconds -"You look like a little ghetto smurf." Rocky Horror Picture Show - "Janet!" "Dr. Scott!" "Janet!" "Brad!" "Rocky!" The Prince and Me - "I still think we should have stopped by that biker bar." Miss. Congeniality - "I am in a dress, I have gel in my hair, I haven't slept in two days, I am armed; don't mess with me." -trips- Die Hard with a Vengeance - "But that was MY gold bar!"; "I think I made it angry." Overboard - "No...I don't want to go back in the water barrel!"; "I think we can take Olav."; "I got the part of Tiny Tim in the school play!" "I got an A in English!" "I'm flunking math."; " Dr. Corman, Grant's having another nervous breakdown. He thinks he's God." Secondhand Lions - "The kid gets it all. Just plant us in the damn garden... with the stupid lion." ; "I wonder if traveling salesmen sell school supplies...?" Confessions of a Shopaholic - "I did. I googled." ; "Don't you think it's not the best situation for someone to give advice on debt when they have VISA bills hidden under their bed?" "That's irrelevant." Twister - "Cow. ... 'Nother cow." "Actually, I think that was the same cow." 0.o Sweet Home Alabama - "So I can kiss ya anytime I want." Breakfast Club - "You're just a neo-maxi-zoom-dweebie." ; "If he gets up, we'll all get up. It'll be anarchy!" Ferris Bueller's Day Off - "Bueller...? Bueller...?" ; "You killed it."; "Ferris Bueller, you're my hero." SAVE FERRIS Adventures in Babysitting - "You want me to sing? -turns to kids - They want me to sing." Finding Nemo - "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."; "Fish are friends, not food." Shrek - "I mean, of COURSE you're a girl dragon, you're just reeking of feminine beauty." ; "Nobody move! I'm a donkey on the edge!" Field of Dreams - "What're you grinnin' at, you ghost?"; "I'm melting, I'm melting!"; "It's the place where dreams come true." A Knight's Tale "Oh, God; I'd rather you were blind."; "Are you a woman or a blacksmith?" "Sometimes I'm both." The Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood "...I'll knock you into next week!" "Then I'll kick your ass on Thursday." Who Framed Roger Rabbit? "But the liquor store guy... he knew."; "That lame-brain freeway idea could only be cooked up by a toon." Alice in Wonderland - "Curiouser and curiouser."; "You're all late for tea!" Easy A - “What ever happened to chivalry, does it only exist in 80s movies? I want John Cusack holding a boombox outside my window. I want to ride off on a lawnmower with Patrick Dempsey. I want Jake from 16 Candles waiting outside the church for me. I want Judd Nelson thrusting his fist into the air because he knows he got me, just once.”
(Though it's not a movie, I'd have to include NCIS, because that show rocks. Gibbs, Abby, Duckie. McTattle/McGeek/McGrumpy. Heh. "Maybe I did die." "Feel that?" "What?" Gibbs' slap "You're alive." Also - while not AS amazing - NCIS: LA is pretty good too. Makes me laugh; G and Sam are a hilarious duo. Though, I miss Dom terribly. More than I thought I would. It made me cry...! "Is that a casual turn away or a I see two guys who might be law enforcement turn away?" "I might look like law enforcement." "What about me?" "You look like you grew up here."
There's more, I just can't think of them right now.
Black Dagger Brotherhood: By J.R. Ward. Genius woman. My friends and I bow down to you, especially Batgirl. She is obsessed, and wants to start a cult. Not that any of us are objecting... My fave? Zsadist. Completely badass, but so sweet at the same time... And Rhevenge. Then Rhage. Wrath. Thorment. Vishious. John Matthew. Butch. Phury. "You. Thor. Brittany Spears. It's all the same to me." ; "Well you freakin Friday-the-Thirteenthed me!"
Immortal After Dark: By Kresley Cole. Genius woman. Friends with the lady below, too... Came out with Murdoch a few months ago. Most recent fave - Garreth. Oh Lordy, those last few chapters... loved 'em! Before that, Rydstrom. sigh Flowers likes Cadeon better; I told her it worked out perfectly. She could have one brother, I the other, and we'd be legally sisters! And no fighting over them! The sorceress might be an evil b!tch, but she's my evil b!tch. And I'll have no other. - Rydstrom's epigraph, Kiss of a Demon King "Gotcha thinkin' about it, didn't I?" - Cadeon
Lords of the Underworld: By Gena Showalter, whom I want to ask to marry me. Though, I often want to ask Kresley Cole to as well... Their characters are HOT! Speaking of... fans self These guys bring us hell on earth and we don't care. LOVE THEM. I think I like... gah, Paris, Gideon, Amun, Strider... I can never decide. I loved Paris, but he's so sad right now... And apparently not single, not really. Gideon... the man cracks me up. I know he hates Lies, but... gah, I just laugh every time he says something. Honest. Let's see, there's Maddox/Violence, Lucien/Death, Anya, Reyes/Pain, Sabin/Doubt (haha, they're a hilarious duo), Amun/Secrets, Strider/Defeat, Kane/Disaster, Paris/Promiscuity, Torin/Disease... And William. Can't forget WILLIAM. > "Anya was the reason the Titanic sank! She was playing chicken with the ice bergs!" ; "We could have pleasured them for information.
Night Huntress novels: By Jeaniene Frost, the one who sold me on vampires being kickass. Halfway to the Grave If you run, I'll chase you. And I'll find you."Ugh, God, Bones is sexy... "Love to do it in a truck."/ One Foot in the Grave Once you go dead no one's better in bed! /At Grave's End I started loving all the characters - Bones, SPADE, heck even Ian - even more, and definitely am head-over-heels for Vlad. He's awesome (not as much as Bones, but def top three) "You brought the showhound?"/ Destined for an Early Grave "The shit's gonna splatter, start buggin' yo." ; 'A slumber party with Dracula? All things considered, why not?'
Night Huntress World books: A series of side-stories from the Bones' books. First up - Spade in First Drop of Crimson. Ian gets high... sorta. And he sings the Major General song. Why is it that basta... uh. -censors self- Why is it that buzzard makes me like him more with each book he's in? Course... he just sang one of the songs I LOVE from my sixth grade childhood...! Eternal Kiss of Darkness is Mencheres and Kira, who is a pretty kick ass heroine. And I still love Vlad. (WHO, BTW, IS GETTING HIS OWN SIDE-SERIES!!!!)
Mercy Thompson series: By Patricia Briggs, who sold me on werewolves - yummay! Moon Called Heh, Mercy is awesome... it starts out deceptively slow, but picks up and then you can't put it down./Blood Bound "Go Adam!" /Iron Kissed "ChEEZ-zes crusty. Got Al-musty. Got DAMp on the StoneofapeaCH." /Bone Crossed / Silver Borne
Alpha and Omega: Also by Patricia Briggs, a sub-series to the Mercy novels, about Charles and Anna Cry Wolf/Hunting Ground - (takes place just before Blood Bound)
Blood and Chocolate Great story. Really. I hoped whoever had lent them the CD had been forced to listen to them practice. / "Once upon a time, I killed the girl I loved." Can never stop rereading. I do it every couple of months. THAT. AMAZING.
Psy/Changeling series: by Nalini Singh, who has me wishing California was like it is in her books...! :D This is a really great series I've recently gotten into, the writing is wonderful and the plots fun. Plus, her Changelings own me. ;D I love the DarkRiver pack, and of course the SnowDancers too... but I think I've got a thing for the Leopards! ;D
Midnight Breed series: by Lara Adrian. Very much like the Brotherhood but just different enough that I'm happy. :) And I found my favorite... Hunter. WANT. ;D
Dark Hunter series: by Sherrilyn Kenyon also owns me. Acheron broke my heart and Vane's book made me smile and I want my very own Simi. Anything Simi says or does is hilarious. Particularly her love of barbeque sauce and hatred of the Heifer Goddess.
The League series: also by Sherrilyn Kenyon very much makes me happy. It's scify, and exciting. I haven't managed to read the most recent one yet, but I'm DYING to get my hands on it!!! Sherrilyn Kenyon really is the Author Goddess...
Kate Daniels series: by Ilona Andrews. Fun, shorter books about a kick-ass heroine in a twisted version of the modern world... Plus, I love the Pack. ;) Particularly one young sexy wolf...
Date me Baby One More Time Laugh your socks off funny. Satan's sooo funny in this. Like a kid, really. All about...glances around clears throat...um, having fun. (and people, don't read this unless your definitely over 13...or, like, 15...or, maybe even 18...heh)"Hot damn girl. He's totally gorgeous." "You do realize that means I'm definitely going to have to end up killing him?" "Yeah. Bummer." / Must Love Dragons HA! This one's funny, too. Obsession over Vick's Pretzels and a dragon slayer. "I'm really sorry I have to do this," she said, "But I promise to visit you in the afterlife with pretzels, okay?" / He Loves Me, He Loves Me Hot Very funny... Again, Satan makes me like him... lol.
Harry Potter: by J.K. Rowling. I live in denial of Fred ever dying. He didn't. Not really. As a kid, I watched the skies the summer after my eleventh birthday waiting for an owl with my letter - and I'm still half convinced it just got lost. Anyhow, this has to be the best series ever written (and the Brotherhood, once again, is in a category all it's own) and my eternal favorite. "Blown up a toilet? We've never blown up a toilet." "Great idea, though, thanks, Mum." (Fred and George); Where's the fun without a bit of risk? (Fred);
Broken Heart, Oklahoma series by Michele Bardsley "Don't grex, you witling!"
All American Girl God, Meg Cabot is a genius! I love the lists of ten... /Ready or Not This is the sequel of AAG and even more funny... One misunderstanding after the other. "...Parcheesi." or however you spell it...
Divorced, Desperate, and Delicious Ha, I loved this. Read it in five hours, can't put it down, hilarious good. "And I wish you were ice cream." /Divorced, Desperate, and Dating The hilarious sequel, which finally includes the tampon/gun scene. /Divorced, Desperate, and Deceived Funny great conclusion. I laughed almost the whole way through.
Avalon High by Meg Cabot. Really funny, and I love it. Seriously. One of the few teen books I still go back to reread often.
Aisling Grey, Gaurdian novels: By Katie MacAlister Amazing. She's frickin hilarious. And Jim; have to love the wisecrakin demon (or... sprite thrown out of court of Divine Blood, thrown out of Abaddon). And Drake. He's more delicious than chocolate (and that's sayin' something). "It was pretty. I liked it. It's mine."
Playing with Fire / Up in Smoke (the Silver Dragons novels, a sub-series-thingy of the Aisling Grey novels): Gabriel gains some points in my score book in these stories, but Drake is still my fave. Oh. and I hated the ending of the first. I wanted to seriously throw a heavy rock. I was all "This book is so Arg-er-GRR!!" Ask Flowers or Julie. And the second? Can you say, strangle that damn Maggot? "It is unthinkable to imagine I could steal from him," Drake agreed."Completely unthinkable." "...Unless it was gold." "Yes, gold is another matter entirely."
A Bite to Remember Hehehe... I love Vincent. Thanks Vanessa for turning me onto these books! Bite me if you can; The Accidental Vampire (and I love Victor as well);Vampires are Fovever;Vampire, Interrupted; Single, White Vampire; Love Bites A Quick Bite; Tall, Dark, and Hungry
The Goblin Wood Sad ending, really. But good story. Go, goblins!
Undead series Yep. Betsy is hilarious. He was sin in a suit. / One day the devil got bored and decided to posses a not-very-nice pregnant woman and have a baby... See?
The Naming (It's actually pretty good, as in, better than I thought it would be.)/The Riddle/The Crow (Sad, end made me cry a bit... poor Hem!)/The Singing
Maximum Ride series Yeah, who can resist Fang and Iggy and all the cute little kids. And Max's stubborn, sarcastic attitude. She's a role model for all. Bombs are good. I love bombs./ Your soul for a cookie./ I vill now destroy de Snikhurs bahrs!/ Oh, good. Yoda captured us.
Young Wizards series They can't get them out fast enough. Who wants to be left in suspense waiting to find out about Roshaun? "Don't forget the overlays or you'll wind up in the middle of the Atlantic." "So? We have friends there." / "What is it with these Callahan women always yelling?" / "Tomatoes are just happiest on Earth!"
Bartimaeus trilogy yeah, I think I misspelled that. Oh well. Love the little foot notes. I hit my head on a pebble. That's once each on five different pebbles. Just thought I'd clear that up for you. You humans can be so dense.
Like I said, lots more. I'm just not going to put them all down.
I found this on one of my reviewer's profile, and it made me smile hella much and laugh even more, so I just had to put it up! TRUE 90s KIDS RULE!!
That 90s Kid
Just because you were born in ’97 doesn’t mean you’re a 90’s kid
You’re a 90’s kid if:
You’ve ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You just cant resist finishing this "In west Philadelphia born and raised"
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early to watch Saturday morning cartoons in your PJ's still wrapped up in your TMNT, Power Rangers, Barbie, or Fairy Princess comforter
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular
You remember The Original Game Boy
You know the profound meaning of "Wax on, wax off"
You always wanted to send in a tape to America’s Funniest Home Videos but never taped anything funny
You remember watching
-The 1st Batman
-The Magic School Bus
-Step by Step
-The original Power Rangers
Who could forget Snick? & Nick @ Nite with Bewitched, I Dream of Jenie, The Facts of Life & I Love Lucy.
Where everyone wanted to be in love after watching The Wonder Years.
You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey from "Blossom" and that "How Rude!" comes from Stephanie from "Full House"
You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
You have pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
You danced to "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls, Females: had a new motto, Males: got a whole lot gay-er. (so tell me what you want, what you really really want.)
You remember the craze, then the banning of slap bracelets and slam books.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence...Not...
Where in the world is Carmen San Diego? was both a game and a TV game show.
You had a favorite song of ALL TIME
Then, You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time on a tape
You remember watching home alone 1, 2 , and 3...and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"
"I've fallen and I can't get up"
Two words... Trapper Keeper.
You never got injured on a Slip 'n' Slide
You wore socks over leggings scrunched down
When everything was settled by:
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players
You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By The Bell"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet or Nano and brought it everywhere
You remember playing Four Corners, Capture the Flag, Wiffleball, Mother may I?, and Linkin Logs
You watched the original Care Bears, My Little Pony, and Ninja Turtles
NANCY DREW AND THE HARDY BOYS WERE THE BEST MYSTERY BOOKS
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand. (pencils.notebooks.binders.etc.)
You remember when the new Beanie Babies were always sold out.
You used to wear those stick on earings, not only on your ears, but at the corners of your eyes.
When everyone watched the WB.
You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand" ... enough said
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"
You remember when everyone went slinky crazy.
You remember when razor scooters were cool.
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs & paid 3.50 for a movie.
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off our walkmans.
When the Chicago Bulls were the best team ever.
Get Over Here!! means something to you.
Hide-n-Go Seek at dusk.
Red Light, Green Light.
Heads Up 7 Up.
Playing Kickball & Dodgeball until your porch light came on.
Running through the sprinklers.
That "Little Mermaid"
Crying when Mufasa died in the Lion King.
Happy Meals where you chose a Barbie or a Hot Wheels car.
Getting the privilege to sit in the front seat of the car.
Drinking Squeeze It "Squeeze The Fun Out Of It"
Kool-Aid was the drink of choice.
Wearing your new shoes on the first day of school.
Class field trips.
When Christmas was the most exciting time of year.
When 5 dollars seemed like a million, & another dollar a miracle.
When Toys R Us overuled the mall.
Go back to the time when: Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming 'do over!'
'Race issue' meant arguing about who ran the fastest.
Money issues were handled by whoever was banker in 'Monopoly.'
It wasn't odd to have two or three 'best' friends.
Being old referred to anyone over 20.
Scrapes & bruises were kissed & made better.
It was a big deal to finally be tall enough to ride the 'big people' rides at the fair.
When playing Nintendo was the hardest thing ever.
When Ninja Turtles ruled the world.
Another Baby Sitter Club and Little Sister (Karen) book came out and you put your name on hold for it at the library.
When Aladdin was new, before the trilogy was complete.
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool
You remember those Where’s Waldo books
You remember eating Warheads and Splashers Gum
You remember Ring Pops
You remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"
Making those little paper fortune cookie things, and then predicting your life with them
You played and/or collected "Pogs"
Silver dollars, which were cool to have
If you even know what an original walkman is
You went to McDonald’s to play in the playplace
Before the MySpace frenzy
Before the Internet & text messaging
Before Sidekicks & iPods
Before PlayStation3 or X-BOX 360
When we were younger:
Before we realized all this would all eventually disappear.
You're a true 90's kid if you smiled at least more than 10 times. . .
Random things from my friends and I
"Piggies! Piggies, piggies, piggies! Piggies fly over the rainbow!" - my old GS troop
"I want an elephant, I want a elephant!" - Bus
"Once upon a time, there was a magical place where it never rained and I hated the Dewbery boys. The end." - my little sister, Lauren, and I (we combined the "story-telling" from Holes and Because of Winn-dixie)
"It's just a jump to the left. And a step to the right. Put your hands on your hips. And bend your knees in tight. But it's the pelvic thrust...that really drives you insa-a-a-a-a-ane. Let's do the Time Warp again!!" - April, Batgirl, Bus, me
Lock of Axygen - Bus
"GET BACK TO WORK!!" - Batgirl, April, and I
"So what is occurring in your life that others might find intriguing?" - Turtle
"That is a bunch of lies and slander." - Batgirl
"Fang, he can change my mind anytime, about anything." - Fareeda and I
"I get Edward, Mouagoleah can have Jasper, Fareeda gets Jacob, and you can have Emmett." - Ana
"But, Fareeda, I can get Emmett to beat any of you up, so I can flirt with Jacob or Edward, and if any of you try to get revenge, Emmett will kill you for me." - me (hehehe)
"Crazy bitch" (only, bus and I sign this in ASL)
"We're all going to Hell." (also signed by bus and I)
"I curse you from ever being happy, then" - me
"I curse you from ever reading." - Micheal (and this didn't work. so he said, well, it will happen about half a second before you die.)
"Cause, dammit, Janet, I love you." - Bus, Batgirl, Lisa, and I (Rocky Horror. again)
"That's not a tiger. That's a horse having a bad hair-day." (turtle apparently can't draw...)
"Sure, sure." Batgirl, I, Ana, Fareeda (I say this the most, without even really realizing it until AFTER I say it.)
High on Life - bus and I
We kissed every frog in Big Lots. - bus and I
"Literary analysis isn't black and white; unless it's the benchmark assessment." - Mrs. G.
"The scandal!" - Batgirl
"I got high off a lollycane!!" - Me (I called a candy cane a lollicane... 0_o)
"Marry me again." - Bus
"Shut up, I can fly." - bus (there's a big long story behind this... short version? We were joking about being supernatural creatures - her a vampire, me a werewolf - and which was cooler. That was her retort when I said said why I was coolest.)
"I'm humble, and modest, and beautiful." - Ana (she was high on sugar)
"I can't believe we came all this fuckin way for fuckin nothing!" - Ana (same day as the above thing... she was copying what some random guys walking by were saying...)
"I'm sorry, I'm from Stockton!" -Ana (she ... well... long story.)
"I hate it when my blood vomits vaginas." -April (and yes, she is this weird...)
"I prefer the term Caucasian." - Lauren (my little sis,... and did I spell that right??)
"Oh my God; it's a dead guy!" - Ana (there was a motorcycle-er with a skeleton bandana masky thing...)
"You want to go to -" :vague nonsense hand gestures: - Ana (we were leaving campus... to go to the starbucks!)
"It's a big yellow twinkie." - Lisa (referring to a school bus... during SLEWS)
"Speed safely!" - The SLEWs team of 2007/08 (But Turtle said it first.)
"I'm lonely." - Cindi (she said this to our W. Hist. teacher... we didn't let her forget it for a few days... and it's a class joke...)
"Just kidding." - Ana
"I was testing you." - Bus, Ana, I
"Tu Madre" - Dylan and most of the guys. But mainly Dylan
"It's the bionic man" - Dylan
"Rofl" - You don't say the letters, you like sound it out...
"NO TOM CRUISE. You get BACK on that BOAT." - Amanda, April, Batgirl, and I
"I'm dating a midget." - Ana (this was, for a time, her answer to any question... no offense to any short people out there!)
"Excuse me, where are the stripper boots?" - Ana (you don't want to know... long story.)
"I'm not touching it..." - Ana and I
"The guy on the bike." - Ana and I (we were wandering Lodi late at night, and this guy - I swear he was high - was from "fin Montana, blah blah. ... he was kinda scary, but in a funny way. Like a "are you kidding me?" kind of way.)
"Pork Fried Rice." - Ana
"Not even cute." - Ana (yeah, she says a lot of funny things...)
"Do you like crytal gel?" - Ana, Batgirl, April, and I
"Chocolate covered strawberries and whip cream..." - Lisa, Batgirl, April, Angelica, Ana, Kelsey, anyone else that my sleep deprived brain can't remember from Lisa's 16 b-day party... (you don't even want to know...)
"Yo; I'm a ho; don't'cha know? We gotta go!" - This started as Bus and I when walking at night on Halloween to "protect ourselves" from the "gangs", but now Ana and I say it just randomly; it started on the Guy on a Bike night... LOL.
"My boyfriend with curly hair, in a green shirt, in a white ruck; he's looking for me." - Ana (Lisa, Ana, and I saw this cute guy in a truck while crossing Pacific Ave one day; within the five minutes it took us to cross the street again and walk into B&N's, he'd gone from "OK" to "OMG, he's so F'in hot!")
"Drums." - Lisa's 16 party-group. (April loved the drums, I am sure. Didn't you April?)
"Faceplants!" - Batgirl, April (Again, you might not want to know... oh, and girls? Don't get lost down there!)
"I've taught you plenty of useful things!" "Besides sarcasm?" "I regret the day I taught you sarcasm." - My cousin, Jeff, and I.
"This is Candy from last night... I've been thinking about you all day." - Ana's party
"I thought your name was Jennifer?" - Ana's party
"Partners in Crime." - Ana's Party. Sorta.
"Asta la pasta." - Sara, my older sister.
"I need help! Somebody help me!" - Aaron (this guy I went to grade school in... he said this when the classroom was working on fractions, dead quiet... actually, he whined it. We never let him live it down, not even when we were all in sixth grade... if I still went to school with him, I would still tease him.)
"That's us Hiltons. If you're not ready when we are, we'll leave without you, yet we always manage to be late." - me to my general family the summer before Bobby left for Iraq.
"Blasphemy!" - Batgirl
"Smack a bitch." - Ana
"If they're normal, what are you?" "Smart." - Me and Ana
"I wonder if you can juggle sand?" - Ana
"Always check for squirrels." - Ana and Lisa
"Tarzan... it's me; Jane. I have a vagina." - Ana
"Cars." - Marissa, Fareeda, and I
"Shut up! Nobody likes you!" - V
"Wow!" - V, Fareeda, I, and the rest of Mr. Hastings Summer Chem class.
"There was a lotta people. Like, a lotta lotta lot." - Ana and I (we went to WARPED TOUR! YESES!!)
"Sketchy." - Haseeb, Dylan, Adel, Patrick, Jeremy, most the other guys (all twelve of them...)
"C" - You don't WANT to know.
"Yeah, but we're the good kind of weird." - flowers and I
"My karma will understand; I need to get into a good college." - Nohemi, when our 3B AVID class was talking about lying on college apps.
"So; soda machines are like strippers. They get a lot of dollar bills throughout the day!" - Ana
"Go to your corner!" - Katie J (she's all kinds of awesome)
Rerun and Whore Lord. - my special little group...
"Pretzels." - Blame Car and IEWIS. It's all her fault!
"I like being a felon." - Katie
"Hello, the other half of my brain." - Katie and I. (we share a brain. I got math, she got history. I had the felon side, but she stole it. She can keep it.)
"Yeah, and SO. In Chemistry we learned about the Phlostigon Theory and the Oxygen Theory..." - Rosie.
"Go subterfuge yourself." - Jeremy (when speaking to me. rolls eyes)
"Did the Golden Retriever seriously just pat me on the head like I was a Golden Retriever?" - me to flowers when we were at UC Davis
"She called you a dog. A stupid dog!" - me
"Maybe they're having an affair." - me to Katie referring to AJ and flowers.
"Get your mind out of the gutter!" "I'm sorry, I slipped." - Me and Lauren.
"She forced me!" - AJ
"Does Crystal know?" - flowers (snickers)
"Flowers said she's dead." "So is she a vampire now? Or a zombie or a ghoul?" "Well, considering she called during the day, and isn't all mindless, she must be a ghoul. Wonder how that new diet is working out for her." - me and Katie. ;)
"Brotherhood should be required reading for all the girls in the class. Oh, Rhage." - Batgirl (I concur!)
"Ngoc as president. Oh god." - me
"AJ. Juliann's gonna kidnap us a kid, so we'll need you to fake some adoption papers okay?" - Katie
"I want a kid." "Juliann's stealing me one. She can get you one too." - Bus & Katie (Apparently, I'm the go-to for theft of all sorts.)
"Damn those green dragon tendencies." - Katie and I
"That was all you!" - Katie (well she should just stay out of my mind then! It's dangerous in there... However, that one WAS my fault... snickers Oh, god. Testing... hehehe...)
"And if you don't call us back soon, we'll hate you. So call us back. Okay. Bye." - Ngoc (I miss one day of school and within two hours, I'm getting threats. Gotta luv my friends...)
Irritable Grizzzly: Hasn't your brain tried to ooze out your ears or something? me: I shove it back in and apply earplugs. (Chat and mentioning my school-obsessions)
"Brittany, you're my favorite. But don't tell Mai - she'll kill us. It'll be our secret."- Me to Brittany (Honeybunches, flowers, and Brittany all "fight" over me; it's a constantly shifting order of things)
(Next morning after above quote) "No, no. Your just faking it. We know what you said." Mai (in reference to above quote... oops?)
"See, this is why I love Brittany more. And Honeybunches, she'd have come with me!" - me to flowers. lol.
"MOM, May is touching me!" "MOM, Julie hit me! The other Julie hit me! BOTH JULIES ARE HITTING ME! Why'd you name them both Julie?" "I'm not touching you, I'm not touching you!" "Poke!" "MOM, tell Julie to stop it!" "MOM, Brittany is making fun of me!" - May, Julie, me, and Brittany while in Mai's car. Mai/Honeybunches was driving... and she was all (Earlier) leaning halfway over her seat asking "So what do you all want?" in that impatient mom-tone... so she became MOM. lol
"Oh, let's rap it! ... Doe. A deer. A fe-male deer." - May (she wanted to rap the song...)
"We're like that movie Enough with Jennifer Lopez! Waiting with the getaway van..." - May
"Where's Brittany?" "I don't know!" "Maybe we should kidnap her straight out of the classroom!" "Yeah! Mai can race onto campus with her van, and we'll grab Brittany. She can run out and dive in through the door and we'll be all "get in, get in!" and then race off of campus! ... ... Let's do it!" "...I can ACTUALLY see us doing that, too." - Julie, Mai, Julie again, May, me. (We had an interesting free period, can't you tell?)
"Plan B, Mai, let's do Plan B!" - May (in reference to the above idea...)
"You're van is just like mine!" -magical door closes on it's own- "Never mind, no it's not." - May (Honeybunches's van has a button that opens and closes the side door... it's AMAZING!)
"You implied that I'm dumb!" "No I didn't, I wasn't paying attention!" "Doesn't matter, I still hate you today." - Me and Honeybunches.
/Signs: You fingerspells: S-T-U-I-P-D/ "S-t-u- OH. Stupid. You spelled stupid wrong." - my mom and I. lol.
"You're so funny. Sometimes I wish I as a little elf so I could ride around on your shoulder and laugh at you all day." - my mom.
"If you can't tell the other half of your brain, who can you tell?" - Katie.
"EEWW!, you got nose water juice on me! EEWW!" - me. Don't ask.
"What's the bus driver going to do for two hours?" "Get paid." - Brittany and Honeybunches/MOM/Mai
Watching a random movie on the TV; the guy jumps and grabs the hand of a guy hanging on a rope from a helicopter and they fly off over the treetops. "And... they drop him. Oops." "The end. Roll Credits." - me and my dad. lol... we have similar sense of humor.
"Yeah, because that doesn't sound stalkerish." - me to May
"New guy?" "I hope so. New Guy's hot." "New Guy kicks ass." "Yeah." sighs - my mom and I in reference to someone who was on NCIS, lol. We were hoping he'd be a new guy... He was fine.
"He'll be like "Wha...Wha... Wh... Ho... Wha?" and gesturing constantly with his hands! He wouldn't know what to say!" - flowers in reference to Jeremy's reaction to something, haha.
"Hey, at least there will be some eye candy if the movie sucks." - my mom, in reference to New Moon, lol.
"Cream Cheese." - a codeword for Katie and I
"Shakespeare can kiss my poetic ass." - Adel
"I think I just made up a word. Unwiddled. Fuck my life - I don't know! What does it mean? Emotional?" - Adel
Emo Ophelia - the Seniors. ;)
"Thanks for the caring carrot." - Alma
"Son of a reindeer!" - Lauren
"We're having girl talk about boys and boobs." - Katie V.
"I'm adorable!" - Brittany (she's adorable even when she shanks people... yes, that adorable)
"Pushing in a hole, pushing in a hole!" - Brittany (Long story... involving me and flowers making up horrible plots... the best of which was being pushed into a hole, heh)
"I telepathically told the sky to rain this morning but it wouldn't listen!" - flowers
"Someone smells yummy... Oh it's me!" - Mom
"If he weren't such an asshole, I think all the girls would be jumping him." - flowers and I
"One isn't the loneliest number! Zero is!" - Dylan
"Wisconsin isn't that bad." - Cindi
"Fuck snow days, we have rain days!" - Grant (in reference to the fact that the rain knocked the power out on campus, so we got to go home)
"Starbucks is run by the mafia of eight different countries; it should have power!" - Katie... on the same above rain day.
"If I were a guy, I'd totally be into Lisa, too." - me to Katie
"Wow, what good-looking people, they must want me!" - Prof. Dawely (women's hist) talking about how men thought of native women
"Dirty Turtle!" - April, Dylan, a handful of my classmates... Ah, the silly things we did freshmen year...
"It's a Cindi saying." - Cindi gets all these sayings in Mr. V's classes...
"Go die!" - Dylan (to basically everyone)
"Juliann! I need a book!" - everyone to me.
"Juliann, do you have a - wait. This is you. Of course you have a book in your backpack." - Jordan
"My foot looks like a slut!" - Sara
"We get along too well! I'm trying to make you mad and you won't argue with me!" - Ana
Ballistic Ballriders - UOP Freshmen Orientation; the name of my group. (As in the elephants on the huge bouncing balls in the circus... getcha minds outta the gutters people!)
"They were staring at me while I was sleeping, so I turned their heads around, but that made them even stranger." - Lauren
"Standardize YOUR FACE." - Mr. V to Meagan during a debate... lol!
"Pluck you!" - It's not as bad as it sounds! (Mr. K's Eng 12 classes)
"Mr. V we got you a present - it's a dell." out of suitcase pops ADEL; everyone laughs - Talent show Junior year
"Derka derka derka!" - Baggage and America and I
"The College Gods shown a light on me and said "CHILD WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! PARTY IT UP!!!"" - America
"Booga booga booga!" - America
"VAJJ MISSION!" - Valerie, America, Jen, and I
"Shh! I'm on a mission!" - America
"I'm sorry, we can't be friends tomorrow. It's Giants vs. Dodgers." - Valerie to America
"No, I'm aging backwards now. Instead of 57, I'm turning 55." - my dad.
"I didn't know demons had last names!" - Nicole (my creative writing class... we're an interesting bunch, lolol.)
"RECTIFY!" - Chris (English majors have fun with words...)
"It's not stalking if they know about it..." "Yes it is." - Katie V, and then random dude in class.
okay... now that's all. Laughs and Hugs all! Enjoy yourselves!