alice and edward cullen
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Joined 10-07-07, id: 1393445, Profile Updated: 04-12-08
Author has written 3 stories for Twilight.

WARNING: RATED V. FOR VAMPIRE.

some of the following content may be unsuitable for humans.


STORIES:

KINKY - He took one look at its red eyes and snow-white fur and screamed like a girl, “Oh My God! It’s a vampire!” he screeched, “Alice, is that even allowed?” he asked in a hushed tone, staring intentionally at their surroundings.' REVIEW!

LOVE LETTERS? PSSH MORE LIKE SIBLING RIVALRY - Edward and Alice battle it out as they write and respond to witty letters from each other -well WE like to think they are witty- and aim to outsmart each other... R&R

PLEASE DON'T SLEEP ON MY JASPER! - The love-hate relationship between our two favourite vegetarian vampires.. ALICE WHITLOCK and EDWARD CULLEN.. dun. Dun. DUNNNNNN.. VIA EMAIL -insert crazed laughter here- :D

COMING SOON STORIES:

KILLING ALICE - A series of diary entries as Edward fantasises the many possible ways there are of killing, exterminating, extinguishing, disposing, farewelling his favourite sister Alice when she decides to use her visions against him. Traintracks, electric currents and a whole lot of other disasters.

SECRET NOTES IN HISTORY - When Alice and Edward sit next to each other in Modern History, only they know how to transform historical events into humorous stupid affairs that, of course, involve a certain two writers of secret notes. "What makes you think I like your 'special eyes'? They worked wonders on Rasputin, however you Edward- well I forget you are the one and only."


The name's Cullen, Alice and Edward Cullen -strikes James Bond poses-

-bursts into hysterical laughter-

ABOUT US:

Team: VAMPIRE!

Age: Edward: "oh i've lived a fair few years..."

Alice: "haha we're so old that if someone told us to act our age we would die." =P

Height: Edward: -laughs and points at Alice- "ohh dear sister i heard theres a midget convention in Seattle next week..."

Alice: -GLARES-

Eye Colour: Edward: "pure golden" -smug look-

Alice: "psshh dont flater yourself brother, MY EYES ARE RAINBOW! every colour of the rainbow (except red)

im oh so mythical..."

Blood Type: "blood?! what? where?" -licks lips yummo-

Mental State: -hears ambulance sirens-

Alice: -crazed eyes-

"YOU"LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!"

-draws out axe and smashes window-

-runs into the sunset laughing like a crazy person-

Edward: "ummmm honey... you're already dead."

Alcohol Level: Alice: -coughEdwardYouAlcoYou-

Diet: Edward: "unfortunately BOML is not on the cafeteria menu."

Alice: "BOML?? as in blood of mountain lion. jeez you are like two years too late in rad abbreviations."

Edward: "RAD?? now who's abbreviating. what does that stand for?? rent-a-dinosaur??"

Alice: "no little bro. as in rad is the new way of saying cool because its not cool to say cool."

Edward: "and i thought I was the mind reader. well my talents competely r-a-d."

Alice: -death stare- "you could at least try to fit in!!"

Edward: "we ell elllllll sorry miss i-sneak-into-the-cupboard-with-jasper-lucky-edwards-not-here-to-read-our-minds..."

-pauses-

"cane toad??" -interested expression- "how does that work??"

Talents: Edward: - reads alice's mind- "no alice, that is not appropriate to mention here."

Alice: -huffs- "fine. spoilsport." -sees edward sniffing bellas underwear in the near future-

"and you think i'm kinky? "

Edward: "kinky?" -eyebrows furrow- "refresh my memory.."

Alice: "Edward! or should i say, Sex Ed!

YOU ARE SUCH A PRUDE YOU KNOW THAT??

I HEARD THERES A PRUDE CONVENTION IN TOWN!

Occupation: Edward: - evil chuckle-

Alice: "ohh you will never guess. it is the perfect buisness for us type.

-insert dramatic pause- "an underground abitua."

Edward: -licks lips- "the cash flow is amazzing." =)

Tattoos: Edward: -awkward silence-

Alice: -disturbed look- "you should have relised that you cant keep secrets from me, for my sake at the very least."

"but GOD Edward, bella tattoed across your-"

Edward: -hastily changes subject-

Fears: Edward: -quievers in corner- "mortein..its just.. scary alright.. the way they spay it on the floor.. (mumbles of into distance)

Alice: "I AM FEARLESS. wait.. there is one thing." -looks from left to right- (wispers) "what edward does when he thinks he is alone." -twitch- "but he seems to always forget that i am ALWAYS watching.. whether i want to or not." -shivers from memory-

Greatest Achievment: Edward: -glances at Alice's smug look- -rolls eyes- "she rekons she inspired The Scream"

Alice: "psshh.. inspired? I WAS THE SCREAM. (and for all you un artistic folks out there, The Scream, by Edvard Munch, was inspired by a REAL event, "and i sensed an infinite scream passing through nature"(Munch's diary) well i was at the crazy home near by, well screaming, just like a crazy person should and TADA i get a famous masterpiece painted about me.

"and so what have YOU done edward?"

Edward: "well Alice i have a bone to pick at you.

"because infact I WAS THE SCREAM!.. or more the deliciously delicious lama i was eating at the time nearby the incedent..."

-drools-

Alice: -EVIL EYES- "TAKE. THAT. BACK." -fumes-

"or else i shall just have to tell everyone about how in your human life you were RASPUTIN. thats right "-snaps fingers in Z formation- "THE ONE AND ONLY EVIL RASPUTIN."

Edward: -unintentionally does EVIL RASPUTIN EYES-

Alice: "aha dear brother you just proved my point." -smugness-

Edward: -growls- "ok moving on...

"i may hath giveth a feweth suggestions to shakespeare...

as well as

playingg the piano with my toes while piggy backing bella (without her permission i must add) to romantic tchaikovsky"

Alice: "pffttt dont flatter youself. you will always be RASPUTIN to me."

LINKS:

(edward with his magic stick heee heee)

/albums/t133/Anthea_bucket/Edwarddwithwand2.jpg

(THE jasper couch.)but -tear- they changed the discription.

http:///contemporary/jasper.html

add us on myspace -glares- OR ELSE! (you don't know how much we love talking to randoms)

Edward (Victoria) : /victorrrriiiiiiiiiaaaaaa

Alice (Anthea): /thisisantheasspace


This is Bunny. Copy and paste this bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination.

SUPPORT THE VAMPIRE BUNNY!

-red eyes glisten in the bright light-

-emmett runs away screaming, scared of the albino VAMPIRIE rabbit-

-looks around pointedly and wispers in a hushed tone-:

"But alice, is that even allowed?"

just gotta go. VAMPORTO.


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Inevitable by Endlessly Drowning reviews
It's been seventy five years since Edward left Bella in Forks. Now the family has decided it's time to return. What will they find when they get there? And how will Edward deal with the pain?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 43,921 - Reviews: 2220 - Favs: 2,553 - Follows: 1,008 - Updated: 4/24/2012 - Published: 10/29/2007 - Complete
Boarders by Fictionfanatic666 reviews
Modern'What if Darcy and Elizabeth were roomates and saw each other every day, no matter how they felt about each other?
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 32,403 - Reviews: 218 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 203 - Updated: 9/5/2010 - Published: 10/3/2006
I'm the One You Love to Hate by Juuromaru reviews
Liz and Jane are 1st years at College, Will and Charlie 2nd years. Their sisters are now their apartment mates. Mrs. and Mr. Bennet are now their pushy R.A. and her goofy boyfriend. Watch as Fate wickedly throws our favorite pair together again and again.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 28 - Words: 208,580 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 220 - Follows: 191 - Updated: 9/3/2010 - Published: 6/29/2006 - Complete
Breaking Dawn by du1387 reviews
Set after Eclipse. While planning the wedding the Cullens discover a sinister plot involving a vampire takeover. Meanwhile, a new character is introduced, and an old one finds new purpose.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 26 - Words: 42,511 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 11/29/2009 - Published: 9/16/2007
Waiting for Dawn by Alice laughed reviews
Post Eclipse, my version. Now complete. Second place at the Twilight Awards for best alternate Breaking Dawn. Y'all are the best.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 73,561 - Reviews: 2435 - Favs: 3,015 - Follows: 1,093 - Updated: 11/11/2009 - Published: 9/3/2007 - Complete
White Rhapsody by Ryuko Ishida reviews
A pure, white piece of composition. Different themes, different emotions. All written in mere one hundred words. Various pairings. PROMPT 20. GIFTS
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 13,819 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 9/21/2009 - Published: 2/18/2007
Cullenary Educaton: Forks Sex Ed by MarcyJ reviews
Set at the End of Bella's Junior Year. Hilarity ensues when the Forks Gang is forced to endure Sex Education class with Coach Clapp. Chapter 1 is Jasper POV, and each subsequent chapter is from the perspective of a different character.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,726 - Reviews: 2151 - Favs: 3,622 - Follows: 1,678 - Updated: 8/28/2009 - Published: 4/2/2007
AB Type by Kingfishers reviews
The Greatest Story Ever Told, by the Greatest Historian of the World. Aro has lived, figuratively speaking, for three thousand years. Have you ever wondered what he has seen and done? -PENULTIMATE CHAPTER UP-
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 21 - Words: 62,909 - Reviews: 128 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 8/20/2009 - Published: 6/1/2007 - Aro
The Shadowed Veil by Heart.and.Empire reviews
Edward has been acting strange lately,and Bella knows that something is up. Edward dissapears and comes back with mysterious character. She immidiately wins the hearts of the Cullens. Will this new vampiress come between Bella and Edward? Who is she? RXR
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,381 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 7/24/2009 - Published: 12/28/2007
Always Sundown by Heart.and.Empire reviews
Bella is unable to forget about Jacob. She goes through a traumatic state and maybe making the biggest mistake of her life, leaving Edward. She rebels against everyone and everything she loves. Will she be able to pull it together?Or is this the end?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,720 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 7/24/2009 - Published: 12/27/2007
Devestated Devotion by Heart.and.Empire reviews
Bella learns what devestation and deprivation can do to ones heart. What lengths would one go to in the search of happiness? Is a MUST READ. This is a story taken place in the midst of New Moon Before the jump .
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,180 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 7/24/2009 - Published: 3/4/2008
You Change Your Mind, Like A Girl Changes Clothes by Werehoturnot reviews
In this short story, you get a look inside Lizzy's journal. Her romance with the one and only, Will Darcy. Her embarrassing moments, and her life, rolled into one. Modern P&P.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,006 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 10/10/2008 - Published: 9/4/2008 - Complete
Attack Of The Cliches! by NotToBeMessedWith reviews
Sick of overly cliched Twilight fics? Well, here's your chance to laugh at exactly how stupid they are! A new cliche whenever I can! Now featuring cliches written by our readers! I do love being cruel... T for some swearing. And remember to hate on Jake!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 24,727 - Reviews: 1068 - Favs: 321 - Follows: 205 - Updated: 8/20/2008 - Published: 10/21/2007 - Complete
Being Sane in Insane Places by BurningIce22 reviews
Alice had existed for just over four years when she began to frighten her parents. She knew things. Things she shouldn’t know… couldn’t know. And she was locked away for it. ,,,continues through vampire years,,,
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 43,561 - Reviews: 178 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 8/2/2008 - Published: 1/27/2007
Ask Auntie Carlisle by Jasper-and-Carlisle reviews
Carlisle answers questions! 'Tis fabby. T for some language. Beware of Bella bashing, OOCness, and pro-Jacob!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 14 - Words: 11,448 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 7/20/2008 - Published: 2/16/2008 - Carlisle, Jasper
Nightmares and Silhouettes of Love by Kat06 reviews
I feel everything. Yet, I FEEL nothing. I could be your darkest nightmare." A Jasper and Alice story. Reviews are always appreciated, constructive critism is welcome.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,388 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/13/2008 - Published: 7/2/2008 - Jasper, Alice
Moments with the Cullens by R.Hale reviews
A story about many funny moments with the Cullen family. Bella is a vampire aleady, and new experiences with the family are of course going to be...interesting. Find out what happens, in the moments spent with the Cullens. first fanfic, be nice! R&R
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 7,452 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 6/22/2008 - Published: 2/24/2008
love is truly something by YinDragonVampire reviews
sequal to truth or dare with seducing.bellas pregnant,edward ecstatic,charlies fuming,emmett & jasper teasing continues on,lemons,and everything you loved about the last one times ten!edward gets bella pregant and this is their funny little adventure. R&R
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 13,797 - Reviews: 1237 - Favs: 775 - Follows: 894 - Updated: 6/2/2008 - Published: 9/11/2007
Face Down by Greekchic reviews
Modern P&P. Will Darcy's dare was clear. Within 6 months, he needed to charm, date, and break up with Lizzy Bennet. What wasn't part of the dare, however, was falling in love with her. COMPLETE.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 123,761 - Reviews: 1296 - Favs: 534 - Follows: 315 - Updated: 5/26/2008 - Published: 9/10/2007 - Complete
Second to a Haircut by An LOTR Freak reviews
Small Alice and Jasper centric drabbles about various but important moments in their lives. Originally a one shot...but some stories need to be heard from different ways.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,841 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 5/13/2008 - Published: 1/21/2008
Bonding by IsabellaMarieSwan123 reviews
Edward is away hunting and Bella is stuck with Emmett and Jasper, games begin and truth or dare is one of them. Please Read and Review
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 19,283 - Reviews: 679 - Favs: 477 - Follows: 385 - Updated: 4/10/2008 - Published: 3/23/2007
Beneath the Surface by Bribbie reviews
JacobOC EmbryOC. Pretty much an Imprint story. I'm terrible at summaries, but here it goes. Jacob and Embry run across a two best friends in the woods alone. But Love is complicated, even with imprinting.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 50,082 - Reviews: 196 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 3/27/2008 - Published: 12/5/2007
Surprise by Eowyn77 reviews
Carlisle is taken by surprise by two visitors -- Alice and Jasper.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,885 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 209 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 3/6/2008 - Published: 3/5/2008 - Complete
Empathy by SoEagerForEternalDamnation reviews
What was it like for Jasper while Alice is in Italy? Jasper POV.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 471 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 10 - Published: 2/3/2008 - Complete
Dirty Dancing by iluvcarlisle reviews
This is Carlisle and Esme.... They go dancing. ENJOY! This is for anybody who liked Edward or Bella.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,722 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 12/21/2007 - Published: 9/24/2007
Lost and Found by Incantare reviews
Alice and Jasper's story from the time of their meeting to joining the Cullen clan. Alice's point of view. Please read and review! Complete.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 11,157 - Reviews: 130 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 12/16/2007 - Published: 10/21/2007 - Complete
I like bears by Alice laughed reviews
Emmett in 200 words. I just couldn't leave him alone. I might add other subjects in the future.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 208 - Reviews: 466 - Favs: 441 - Follows: 64 - Published: 11/2/2007
Interupting Bella by Klutzzy55 reviews
Origanilly a oneshot, but it was hard to resist! How does doghnuts, Rosalie, and hair mix? What is Emmett's blinky thing? Why does Alice despise McDonalds? How can Jasper be a life gaurd? What is Esme better at doing than Carlisle? LOVE REVIEWS!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 42,466 - Reviews: 256 - Favs: 98 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 10/30/2007 - Published: 6/28/2007
Summer Solstice by teenprodigy reviews
Leaves off right after Eclipse. WARNING: ECLIPSE SPOILERS!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,633 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 10/9/2007 - Published: 8/22/2007
Edward Cullen by reenastar reviews
This poem tells readers what Edward Cullen means to Bella Swan. POSSIBLE SPOILERS IF U HAVE NOT READ THE TWILIGHT SERIES! i hope u like it!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 160 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/8/2007 - Complete
Playing Dirty by MidnightWalking reviews
Submission to a Challenge. 55 word exactly.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 93 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/1/2007 - Emmett, Rosalie - Complete
In My Eyes: Jasper by enchanted-mind reviews
Oneshot. 'Those criticising eyes stare back at me, the red only all too familiar.' Jasper slipped up and is tormenting himself with relentless self-hatred and disgust - the ultimate price to his satiation. His Conclusion? 'No one will mourn a monster.'
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,991 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/5/2007 - Jasper - Complete
Intoxicated by Eowyn77 reviews
The first kiss, from Edward's perspective.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,025 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 263 - Follows: 39 - Published: 8/6/2007 - Complete
Lidia Rua by Kingfishers reviews
sillybella's July challenge. What passes through Marcus's head when he learns Edward loves a human?
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 976 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 8 - Published: 8/4/2007 - Complete
Dreaming In Pink by gnbrules reviews
Remus talks in his sleep, Sirius overhears him. SiriusRemus FRIENDSHIP, nonslash, Lupin x Tonks
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 779 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 7 - Published: 7/31/2007 - Remus L., N. Tonks - Complete
The Birds and the Bees by Tee2007 reviews
Carlisle has The Talk with Edward so things are sure to go awry! The new chapter is finally here, thank you for waiting so patiently. Coming up next is Alice and Rosalie having The Talk with Bella, so stay tuned! Rated T for suggestive situations!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,989 - Reviews: 359 - Favs: 432 - Follows: 422 - Updated: 7/27/2007 - Published: 4/2/2007
Ron the emo by starryskiesx reviews
Just a humorous parody of ron turning emo. He tries to fit in with the other emo kids at Hogwarts. How will his friends react? Is Ron getting himself into something too deep? What are you asking me wat are you askin me for, read it! slight hhr, pos. RWOC
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,536 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/17/2007 - Published: 4/26/2007 - Ron W., OC
Where's The Love? by MarcyJ reviews
Jasper Hale has been keeping a secret from his family. What happens when the truth comes out in the most accidental of ways?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,008 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 168 - Follows: 34 - Published: 7/5/2007 - Complete
Fire and Ice by Kingfishers reviews
What made Jane and Alec become what they are? Part of AB Type universe. Entry for Amore di Anima Fanfiction Challenge
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,917 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Complete
Trepidation by MidnightWalking reviews
Even as I delighted in the strange sensations his nibbling created in the pit of my stomach, I couldn’t help but worry about how lost and hurt I would feel if I did anything that would displease him and drive him from my side. Rosalie & Emmett.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,890 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/23/2007 - Emmett, Rosalie - Complete
The Birds & The Bees Emmett Style! by UnicornGoddess95 reviews
How does Bella get unglued from Edward? Find out and prepare to laugh! Complete for now...maybe I'll come up with more hilarity.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,515 - Reviews: 723 - Favs: 956 - Follows: 578 - Updated: 5/10/2007 - Published: 3/19/2007 - Complete
Mistakes and Misconceptions by IndependantLioness reviews
Elizabeth lost her heart to Darcy long ago, when she stripped away his proud exterior and found humanity and passion beneath it. And yet...for his own sake...Darcy can never know. Epilogue up! COMPLETE!
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 45,451 - Reviews: 559 - Favs: 614 - Follows: 297 - Updated: 4/28/2007 - Published: 1/25/2006 - Complete
Can't Catch Me by codenamelily reviews
Remus Lupin was nothing if not logical. But she made him forget about the logical. RemusTonks
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,214 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/10/2007 - N. Tonks, Remus L. - Complete
Jasper in Gym by LindaRoo reviews
A PE scene from Twilight, from Jasper's point of view.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,282 - Reviews: 148 - Favs: 225 - Follows: 42 - Published: 2/1/2007 - Complete
Attention, WalMart Shoppers by sillybella reviews
Edward has decided Bella needs protection. What kind ofprotection? The kind you can buy at Walmart. In the pharmacy.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,536 - Reviews: 1744 - Favs: 3,185 - Follows: 677 - Updated: 1/29/2007 - Published: 1/24/2007 - Complete
Directors Cut by Hartabound reviews
Modern P&P. Elizabeth Bennet and Fitzwilliam Darcy are actors working on a 19th Century film adaption, suffice to say all does not go according to plan!
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 21 - Words: 61,768 - Reviews: 332 - Favs: 227 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 11/20/2006 - Published: 5/7/2006 - Complete
The Untouchable by Marshie12 reviews
There is a girl that has managed to lodge herself in my temporal lobe. Or whatever lobe that it is girls like to take over in your brain. Don't ask me I'm a football player. Not a brain surgeon. Meet Cam and Sean. P&P americanized.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 32,012 - Reviews: 188 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 11/14/2006 - Published: 10/7/2006 - Complete
Never Better by The Brilliant Fool reviews
New preface, please read! An updated P&P story, set in modern Boston. Lizzy drinks vodka, Darcy... hasn't change
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 40 - Words: 96,788 - Reviews: 1056 - Favs: 285 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 10/26/2006 - Published: 6/27/2002 - Complete
Definition Mental State by bibliophyle reviews
Follow Jasper as he assaults Edward and anyone who gets in his way with a plethero of unwanted emotions! Mild language and sexual references. Chapter 2 'ANGST' now here! Review peeps!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,743 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 142 - Follows: 144 - Updated: 10/23/2006 - Published: 10/22/2006
Love and Other Accidents by paperclipz reviews
Done! A modern P and P. Darcy and Bingley are musicians trying to find material for their new album in a rural college town...where they meet the Bennet twins who are surviving college together. Lizzy's a photographer, and Jane's a med student.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 208,718 - Reviews: 776 - Favs: 1,305 - Follows: 320 - Updated: 9/2/2006 - Published: 1/12/2006 - Complete
Just Another Day with my Psychic Wife by PinkPixie019 reviews
Ok this is story 2 in my Who's better in Bed Set. We have Alice and Jasper! Ok so this onis a little more Graphic than EB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,226 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 20 - Published: 8/16/2006 - Complete
A Bit of Advice by DJ Clawson reviews
Three days before his wedding, Bingley goes to the only man who can give him the advice he needs: the unfortunate Mr. Darcy.
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 50,621 - Reviews: 402 - Favs: 632 - Follows: 169 - Updated: 5/3/2006 - Published: 3/11/2006 - Complete
Shine by luna leigh reviews
Beth's last summer before college was going perfectly well until the arrival of Will Darcy threatened to change everything. After repeated misunderstandings, can they ever manage to be friends?
Pride and Prejudice - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 116,436 - Reviews: 857 - Favs: 1,403 - Follows: 229 - Updated: 6/10/2005 - Published: 9/24/2003 - Elizabeth, Mr. Darcy - Complete
Howlite by mercutio-rane reviews
What does it take to infuriate an auror who loves you? Remus finds out the hard way. A Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,692 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 187 - Follows: 14 - Published: 3/6/2005 - Remus L., N. Tonks - Complete
Contemplation by Aegle reviews
A series of vignettes focusing on Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks during OotP. Complete!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 3,383 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 1/30/2005 - Published: 1/20/2005 - Remus L., N. Tonks - Complete
Divine Denial by Diane LD reviews
Thinking is vastly overrated. Denial is divine. Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks, post- OoTP.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,113 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/17/2004 - Remus L., N. Tonks
Mental, Emotional, and Physical State of R Lupin by Elorapid reviews
Remus has a late-night visitor by the name of Nymphadora Tonks. A bit of fluffy TonksRemus interaction.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,393 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 11 - Published: 11/11/2003 - Remus L., N. Tonks
The Vampire by Syrus1 reviews
A little Kinky slash Poem about VAMPIRE!Snape and DONOR! Harry
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 126 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/18/2003 - Harry P., Severus S.
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Please Don't Sleep On My Jasper! reviews
The love-hate relationship between our two favourite vegetarian vampires.. ALICE WHITLOCK and EDWARD CULLEN.. dun. Dun. DUNNNNNN.. VIA EMAIL -insert crazed laughter here- :D
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Crime - Chapters: 20 - Words: 6,870 - Reviews: 239 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 9/4/2008 - Published: 4/4/2008 - Alice, Edward
Love Letters? Pssh More Like Sibling Rivalry reviews
Edward and Alice battle it out as they write and respond to witty letters from each other -well WE like to think they are witty- and aim to outsmart each other... R&R
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,192 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 7/26/2008 - Published: 3/11/2008 - Alice, Edward
Kinky reviews
He took one look at its red eyes and snow-white fur and screamed like a girl, “Oh My God! It’s a vampire!” he screeched, “Alice, is that even allowed?” he asked in a hushed tone, staring intentionally at their surroundings.' REVIEW!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,691 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 3/22/2008 - Published: 3/3/2008