Spiffing Repartee
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Joined 10-13-07, id: 1397577, Profile Updated: 12-26-08
Author has written 6 stories for Harry Potter.

About me:

I am multilingual.

Bad grammar makes me (sic).

I adore sexual banter.

OOO

Hyperbole is my best friend.

Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.

No you cannot go out with me, as I'm currently engaged in an amorous liaison with the semi-colon.

OOO

I recently began writing fanfics after realising the truth of the idiom, 'if you want it done properly, do it yourself.'

Enjoy.

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Still Loved By All by Lilith1631 reviews
Draco, Champion of Muggles, is continuing his quest to be Loved By All - sequel to LBA
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 18,318 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 3/4/2010 - Published: 12/26/2008 - Harry P., Draco M.
A Stranger Garden by jamie2109 reviews
Draco Malfoy was never very fortunate when it came to bringing pain and misery to a certain Mr. Potter. His latest plan is no exception. Or is it?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 59,717 - Reviews: 128 - Favs: 213 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 2/5/2009 - Published: 12/2/2008 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
The Same Species As Shakespeare by Lomonaaeren reviews
HPDM slash, AU after HBP. Harry and Draco have a mutual fascination. Name it obsession and add a mystery, and suddenly things are so much uglier. COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 34 - Words: 142,080 - Reviews: 533 - Favs: 343 - Follows: 149 - Updated: 12/21/2008 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Hephaestus by Lomonaaeren reviews
HPDM slash. After Harry returned from torture horribly scarred, Draco rejected him in revulsion. But in the years since, Harry has prospered- and Draco may have a chance to learn that more than beauty matters.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 9 - Words: 43,445 - Reviews: 346 - Favs: 885 - Follows: 268 - Updated: 12/4/2008 - Published: 11/4/2008 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Hissy Fit by Cheryl Dyson reviews
Harry is an under-utilized Auror and Draco is an auditor for Gringotts. He lives to torment the Ministry and, of course, Harry Potter. He is also a Registered Animagus. This fic contains MATURE adult content.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 29,447 - Reviews: 798 - Favs: 1,701 - Follows: 321 - Updated: 6/26/2008 - Published: 6/17/2008 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Time of Day by TorringMay reviews
H/D...Harry hated Thursdays, and as he stepped out of the floo to be greeted by a rather harassed looking Narcissa Malfoy, he knew this day wasn’t going to get any better.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,959 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 109 - Follows: 11 - Published: 5/9/2008 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
A Certain Kind of Memory by jamie2109 reviews
What would you do if you were given less than a year to live? An uplifting Harry Draco story.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 96,105 - Reviews: 731 - Favs: 1,298 - Follows: 283 - Updated: 5/7/2008 - Published: 1/29/2008 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Summer of Emerald silk and Black lace by Bitter Red Irony reviews
[COMPLETE] A summer between two enemys, the thrill of Hermione's final summer, the lessons that Draco teachers her and the world he shows her. M for content.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 19 - Words: 46,620 - Reviews: 447 - Favs: 326 - Follows: 130 - Updated: 8/25/2007 - Published: 12/15/2004 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Loved By All by Lilith1631 reviews
Draco wants to do the London Marathon... Crack!fic, humour, NOT technicalsporty stuff, COMPLETE!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 31,971 - Reviews: 172 - Favs: 223 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 8/15/2007 - Published: 7/16/2007 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Please Don't Ask Me by jamie2109 reviews
Post War. Harry is married to Ginny, but one night he kisses Draco.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,141 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 198 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 11/13/2006 - Published: 11/9/2006 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Love, I'll See You Later by Mia Fitzpatrick reviews
Draco and Hermione bond over their mutual hatred for one exasperating redhead.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,236 - Reviews: 121 - Favs: 751 - Follows: 79 - Published: 8/14/2006 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Bond by Anna Fugazzi reviews
Yet another one of those Harry And Draco Are Forced To Be Together By Something Beyond Their Control And Then Stuff Happens Leading To Twoo Wuv stories. Because every HD writer has to write at least one. [Finished]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 204,036 - Reviews: 3659 - Favs: 9,248 - Follows: 2,127 - Updated: 3/30/2006 - Published: 7/20/2005 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Silent I by Bitter Red Irony reviews
First installment of the Silent Trilogy. They came in everyday, ordered the same drinks and sat in silence... HGDM
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,323 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 16 - Published: 2/13/2006 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
Onnagata by Dark-Kingdoms reviews
Shiro, an onnagata, has to meet an unusual guest. What had to happen, happens. But more slowly than one would expect. Yes, Kunzite and Zoisite ARE the main characters of this story. Trust me. And it's finished. 9 chapters, all done.
Sailor Moon - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 16,621 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/19/2004 - Kunzite/Malachite, Zoicite/Zoycite - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Forsaken reviews
Harry has forsaken Draco to a dank hell-hole, and it will take all his Malfoy wit and charm to get out. SLASH. Crack!fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 670 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/10/2008 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Male Model reviews
After a years hiatus Hogwarts is reopened, but things have changed. Draco Malfoy has a dazzling new life as a male model, but is everything really as beautiful as it seems? He and Harry are still enemies, right? Set after DH. SLASH
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,727 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 5/1/2008 - Published: 4/21/2008 - Draco M., Harry P.
The Four Loves of Harry Potter reviews
BANK: There is no such thing as true love. There is only: fleeting love, deluded love, gratuitous love and monotonous love. Harry Potter experiences them all in this quartet of one shots. HHr, HD, HR, HG.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,074 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 11/12/2007 - Published: 11/2/2007 - Harry P.
And so it is, just like you said it would be reviews
BANK: A scintillating tale of libidinous trysts, hatred, revenge, façades, and love, which according to Draco is just, “Something fools swindle themselves into believing so they can get laid.”
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 23 - Words: 28,196 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 11/11/2007 - Published: 11/2/2007 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
I’d sell my soul, for those beautiful seconds reviews
BANK: Dramione Simply put, the most beautiful thing you will ever read under six hundred words. Three chapters from three perspectives.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 598 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/3/2007 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
A Midsummer Night's Dream reviews
BANK: Wherein Hermione and Draco engage in sexual banter.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 754 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/2/2007 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete