Author has written 13 stories for Naruto, Fruits Basket, Twilight, Bleach, Total Drama series, Avatar: Last Airbender, Inuyasha, Ouran High School Host Club, Fullmetal Alchemist, Yu-Gi-Oh, and DRAMAtical Murder/ドラマティカル マーダー.
Hi my name is Jesica A.K.A. Kalypso Fox, previously Tomi's Little Jenna, previously Jasper's Calming Nature, previously Akatsuki's Cherry Blossom but some people call me Sachiko because of these anime people I made with my friend, and my name was Sachiko Satomi, or Jenna May; another character created by me and my bestie/sis. I kind of want to change my name to Kalypso, Makayla, or Janessa; but, whatever. :3
I am currently 19 and I'm also Bi; deal with it. ;]
I have 13 stories up so far and ten of them are still in progress while three are completed, two one-shots with sequels in the works and one 2-shot on FanFiction.
PS. I am also a registered beta reader, take a look at my beta profile and please do consider me as a your choice in a beta. :3
All of my stories from FF will be transferred to Archive of Our Own (AO3) soon, I have first transferred my two one-shots just as a precaution, seeing as how they are my most graphic and could very well run into trouble here. The rest of my stories will soon follow:
Check out some original stories I'm currently working on at my FictionPress account: https://www.fictionpress.com/u/732982/Makayla-Marie-Vampire-Queen
1) Midnight Thirsts (Vampire Fic)
Check out my fanfiction characters, and possible fanfic info at:
Add me on:
Twitter:(RP Fan account)
Tumblr:(RP fan account)
"Yes, I am bisexual. I can't help who I fall in love for, or that I think both girls and guys are hot. I have many Bi friends. Yeah. It does say in the bible something about being gay is a sin, but do ANY of you truly, truly believe God is against being with the one you love?" - Chidori Rage
"I don't care if you're black, white, straight, bisexual, gay, lesbian, short, tall, fat, skinny, rich or poor. If you're nice to me, I'll be nice to you. Simple as that." -Eminem
An Ode to Yaoi
If yaoi were vodka
And I were a duck
I'd swim to the bottom
And drink my way up
But Yaoi ain't vodka
And I ain't a duck
So give me some yaoi
And shut the fuck up
You are an Innocent Uke!
Hmmmmm... I don't believe this... I am NOT uke! I am kind of innocent though... sadly... But; other then that! NONE of this is true! xD
Rekindling an Old Life Outfits:
(Chapter 4-look for the Hitachiin twins pic)
"Every year pit bull terriers are responsible for the death of 3 people. 40 children a year drown in 5 gallon water pails, in your lifetime you are 16 times more likely to drown in a 5 gallon water pail then be killed by a pit bull. Pit bulls were known as the number 1 family dog in the 20th century, but the very same qualities that make this breed such a wonderful pet, are also valued by those who use them as fighting dogs, training them in brutal methods, some even going as far as to sew bottle caps under the dogs skin to ensure they're in constant pain, to make then more aggresive. 150 people a year are killed by falling coconuts, making you 60 times more likely to be killed by a palm tree then by a pit bull. Pit bull puppies, ones that have never fought before are often killed because their parents were fighters, since when did it become guilty until proven innocent? According to the American Canine Temperament Testing Association, 82.5% of the American Pit Bull Terriers that took the temperament test passed, compared to a 77% passing rate for all breeds on average. In the test a dog is placed in a series of confrontational situations. The first sign of aggression or panic is a failure of the test. Pit Bulls have achieved the fourth highest passing rate of all 122 breeds tested.
It is more then half a million times more likely that a human will kill a pit-bull then the other way around. For every pit bull that kills, there are 10.5 million that don't. Most pit bulls are killed by they're owners because they REFUSE TO FIGHT in dogfights. So millions of pit bulls are being blamed for the actions of .94% of the breed."
Copy and repost this if you think the banning/killing of pitbulls is wrong
Tokio Hotel is officialy my fvorite band! Tom Kaulitz is so HOT! Toio Hotel is such an awesome band, i love german, and their music is so cool! Go Tomi!!
1. Real TH fans know more songs than Monsoon.
XXXPUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE IF YOU ARE A REAL TH FANXXX
God wanted Tom to be the hottest guy on earth (and he still is!) But then...Bill was born. ( Though to me will always be second to my Tomi! )
I love Bill's cute front teeth.
1. G: orgeous!
1. T: otally hot!
1. B: estest sexiest talented singer!
1. G: reat!
I Pledge Allegiance, To Tokio Hotel of Germany.
You say pink, I say black.
God had a perfect plan, he wanted TOM to be the most beautiful guy in the world...his plan was a success for 10 minutes but then FAILED when BILL KAULITZ was born!
YOU KNOW U R OBSESSED WITH TOKIO HOTEL WHEN...
It takes a minute to like their looks.
It takes a song to like their music.
It takes an hour to fall in love with them.
It takes a day to become obsessed with them.
But it takes a lifetime to forget them.
(Copy this on your channel if you're a TH fan!)
God made Coke, God made Pepsi
God made Coke, God made Pepsi
God made Coke, God made Pepsi
God made Coke, God made Pepsi
TH FANS FIGHT FOR THEM AGAINST HATERS AND MAKE TH EVEN MORE POPULAR SO THEY CAN BECOME A LEGENDARY GROUP! PASTE THIS ON YOUR CHANNEL IF YOU AGREE! TH FANS STICK TOGETHER FOREVER!
I pledge allegiance to the music, of sexy Germans of Tokio Hotel.
100 Percent Tokio Hotel Fan
100 Percent Bill Kaulitz Lover
100 Percent Tom Kaulitz Lover
100 Percent Georg Listing Lover
100 Percent Gustav Schäfer Lover
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Man: Is this seat empty?
Man: Your place or mine?
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together.
Man: Your eyes, they're amazing.
If you repost this you will get a phone call 37 minutes after you repost
GIRLS REPOST THIS AS "female comebacks"
Jasper Hale is AWESOME!! Jasper, Yay!!
Deidara x Gaara
Sasori x Deidara
Sasori x Gaara
Sasuke x Gaara
Sasuke x Naruto
Itachi x Sasuke
Itachi x Deidara
Kakashi x Sasuke
Kakashi x Naruto
Jiraiya x Naruto
Kiba x Naruto
Kiba x Shikamaru
Asuma x Shikamaru
Hidan x Shikamaru
Kakuzu x Hidan
Pein x Itachi
Pein x Naruto
Yondaime x Naruto
Kakashi x Iruka
Iruka x Naruto
Sasori x Sakura
Sasuke x Sakura
Itachi x Sakura
Deidara x Sakura
Naruto x Sakura
Hidan x Sakura
Kiba x Sakura
Neji x Sakura
Kakashi x Sakura
Shikamaru x Ino
Shikamaru x Temari
Naruto x Hinata
Neji x TenTen
Neji x Hinata
Sasuke x Ino
When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and bitch slap the asshole upside the head for annoying you in the first place. (so many ppeople deserve this, it's not even funny)
"If you love someone put thier name in a circle, instead of a heart, because hearts can break, but circles go on forever"
No means No
Guy: "Can we have sex right now?
Girl: "Can we do what?"
Guy: "You know, can I be your first, finally?"
Girl: "Because, 1. you have a girlfriend, who happens to be my friend..."
Guy: "So, if you don't tell, I won't tell."
Girl: "Besides that, I'm waiting for someone special. Someone that I want to be with for the rest of my life to be my first."
Guy: "I'm not special to you?"
Girl: "You're my friend. That's all."
Guy: looks forward and keeps driving.
5 minutes pass...
Guy: starts to run his hand up the girl's thigh.
Girl: moves his hand, "Don't touch me.".
Guy: tries to kiss her.
Girl: screams, "Would you stop."
Guy: continues trying.
Girl: moves to the back seat
Guy: parks on an abandoned street and gets in the backseat with the girl. Starts to kiss her.
Girl: pushes him off and scoots over, "Please, don't do this."
Guy: "Don't do what, I know you want it, I can see it in your eyes." Moves over to her and starts to unbutton her pants.
Girl: pushes him harder and says, "No, don't."
Guy: getting aggravated, punches her and tells her to stop "playing hard to get".
Girl: crying, continues to fight.
Guy: punches her harder, pulls her pants off, and holds her down.
Girl: screams as he penetrates her, "NO, please don't do this to me!"
Guy: puts his hand over her mouth.
An hour passes...
Guy: pulls back and wipes himself off.
Girl: sits on the corner of the seat, crying.
Guy: looks at her and says, "You better not tell anybody about this. If you're really my friend, you won't tell anybody about this. You know I love you." He reaches out his hand to touch her cheek.
Girl: pulls back, "Just take me home, now."
Guy: says, "Alright." Gets in the front seat and drives her home.
2 months later...
Girl: "Doctor, what's wrong with me. I haven't had my time of the month in 2 months."
Doctor: looks at her, "You haven't been having your "time" for a reason."
Girl: looks at him and says, "Why?" dreading the answer that she was sure to receive.
Doctor: "You are pregnant."
The story gets out that she is pregnant, and people start looking to the Guy. He claims that it isn't his because she was sleeping with every guy in the school(which was a lie). He goes to her and tells her, "I'm telling you, if you lie to people and say that I raped you, I'll kill you."
The Girl is completely devastated. First, he took her virginity and got her pregnant...then he lied about it. So completely depressed...the girl commits suicide by drug overdose...
Girls, if this story touched you, put this on your profile under "No means no"
Guys, if this story pisses you off, put this on your profile under "I'll kill any fucker who does this to my girl or any girl"
THE WE HATE KARIN CLUB:If you hate Karin from NARUTO, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Pink Crescent Moon, Kinomi-chan, EstherAngelofDeath, GaaSakuforever, missladylaura, SakuraPetals14, Tomi's Little Jenna
Is it just me or is Gaara really hot? If you think he is copy this and put it into your profile and add your name to the list. UNITE GAARA LOVERS!!GaaraandAikoforever, LoveShinobi4eva, Silver Element, BlueSkyHe, Gaara's Sand Angel, aven, Ketsueki Senshoku, Gaara's Pyro RACCOON, Gaarasminestayaway, .Faking.This.Smile, Lilly, Jay Jay, StormofSilver, inspired122, Katsumi18, Rawr I'm Gonna Eat You, Missyserena214, GaaraIno4ever, sasukerules.org, Chibi PO'd Hiei, XiaBubbleQueen, Tomi's Lttle Jenna
If you think that Sasuke from Naruto completely has to have the nick-name 'Chicken Butt Hair Dude', copy this to your profile while laughing your ass off.
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile (I am a Narutard and proud of it! That and my obsession with Gaara scares people...)
Even when you can’t see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile
If you are an absolute anime freak then copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you draw anime/manga paste this onto your profile.
if you like writing paste this onto your profile.
If you like reading, copy and paste this into your profile.
If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you or your best friend is insane copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile
If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy this into your profile
If you have ever had a dream about being the coolest and most skilled person in a movie you just saw copy and paste this to your profile
If you zone out during the day imagining that same dream continuing on then copy and paste this on your profile.
If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.
If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!
If you have ever wished you could materialize a hammer/spade/frying pan/giant fan out of thin air to beat someone with, put this intoyour profile.
If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.
If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile.
My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend than copy this to your profile.
If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
If you think you should be able to watch what you want on TV without being called immature, copy and paste this in your profile
If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile.
If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile
If you have your own world, copy and past this to your profile
This is Kitty. Copy and paste Kitty into your
If you dont care if your not popular, you're just who you are.copy and paste this onto your profile and add your name: Gaara's weakness, Vampire-Gaara-and-Sasuke-girl, darkpeatle202, Tomi's Little Jenna
If you have ever been so wrapped up in thinking about anime,anime fanart or anime fan fictions that you zone out and come back to reality 5 minutes or later with no idea whats going on,copy this onto your profile and add your name: Tomi's Little Jenna,
If you have ever said comething that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy this to your profile and add your name: Akatsuki's Cherry Blossom,
If you hang out with emos,punks,head bangers,skaters,tweakers,rockers and sometimes populars that are your friends but never hang out with jocks,preps,or bimbos,copy this to your profile and add your name: Tomi's Little Jenna,
This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murderer chanted," Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiilling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
God made me pretty.
WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU?!( One of my favorite poems!)
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo
92 percent of American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their heads off at the others.!
If you have told at least 5 people that you are in love with your favorite character from Naruto paste this on your profile
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list.
_ If you're a girl and you've ever
You know that every night before you go to sleep there is a person of the opposite sex who is thinking about you. They want to kiss you, they want to be with you, they are always thinking about you, this is all true, not fake. If you post this within the next 5 minutes the person that is longing to be with you will approach you within the 1 month and ask you out and grab you and kiss you but if you bread this chain, no one will like you or ask you out for the next 5 years...
Pick the ones that fit you (Mine will be italizied)
I'M SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.
I'm JAMAICAN, so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN, so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I must have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terriost.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convienance store.
I'm NATIvE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big DICK.
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER AND ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.
I have BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I must be ugly...or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I must love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm BI so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm ASIAN, so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7.
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be fucked up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in a BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA.
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect.
I'm WHITE and have black friends so i MUST think I'm black.
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I love SHOPPING, so i MUST be rich.
I'm an OG so I must be mexican.
20 Things to do at Wal-Mart
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
9. Look right into the security camera; & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "go, pikachu, go!"
17. Challenge people to duels in the back aisles with wrapping paper tubes.
18. Have a conversation with yourself loud enough so that people in the other aisles can hear you.
19. Throw things over one aisle into another one.
20. Mark out price tags with a sharpie
6 things to do to annoy your friends/roomates
6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.
5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.
4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.
3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich?" Complain loudly that you are hungry.
2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"
1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."
There's a 13 year old girl, and she wished
I'm Katie and I'm 20 and I've been
My name is Ann and I am 45 years
What a great email it was!!
Just scroll down to the end, but
Go for it!
Congratulations! Your wish will
Now follow this carefully...it
If you repost this within the next 5 min.
This is scary!
The phone will ring right after you repost!
:Your One and Only Wish
Do it one by one. Don't look ahead!
1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.
2.Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?
3.Your first initial?
4.Your month of birth?
5.Which color do you like more, black or white?
6.Name of a person of the same sex as yours?
7.Your favorite number?
8.Do you like California or Florida more?
9.Do you like the lake or the ocean more?
10.Write down a wish (a realistic one).
Are you done?
If so, scroll down.
1. You are completely in love with this person.
2.If you choose:
Red: You're alert and your life is full of love.
Black: You are conservative and aggressive.
Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.
Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you
Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are
3. If your initial is:
A-K:You have a lot of love and friendship in your life.
L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to
S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks good.
4. If you were born in:
Jan.-Mar.:The year will go by very well for you and you will discover that you
fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
Apr.-June:You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but
the memories will last forever.
July-Sept.:You will have a great year and experience a major life
changing experience for the good.
Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great but you'll eventually find your
5. If you choose:
Black: Your life will take on a different direction,it will seem hard at the time
but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.
White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do
anything for you, but you may not realize it.
6. This person is your best friend.
7.This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.
8.If you choose...
California:You like adventure
Florida:You are a laid back person.
9.If you choose...
Lake:You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean:You are spontaneous and like to please people.
10.This wish will only come true if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday
If you think Deidara is cooler than Itachi paste this to your profile.
The Deidara is a fucking man, so fuck off with your "Deidara's a girl!" bullshit club. If you know Deidara's a man and will kick anyone's ass if they say he's a girl copy and paste this onto your profile.
92 percent of American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their heads off at the others!
Copy and paste these smilies onto your page to help the Akatsuki take over the world! O/_\o = Itachi! O_V = Deidara _ = Sasori! ( ) = Tobi £_£ = Kakuzu X_x = Hidan -;_;- = Pein!
If you ever had a mad laughing fit for no apparent reason, paste this to your profile.
If you hate those obnoxioussnobby people, PLEASE copy this onto you profile.
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If your one of the two percent who hasnt , copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be somebody they're not, copy this onto your profile.
If you think that those god-forsaken kids should just give that Trix rabbit some Trix then copy this onto your profile.
If you wish to see the Akatsuki take over the world at the end of Naruto, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you don't have a problem with homosexuality, copy this into your profile.
If you think that Sasuke should have died along with Deidara... (not that Deidara should have died in the first place...) paste this into your profile.
If you think it's perfectly okay for Sasuke to argue with himself and lose, copy and paste this in your profile
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
If you hear the characters from Naruto in your head, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you believe the characters from Naruto in your head are real, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you believe the characters are real permanently, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you believe Itachi has secret laughing fits when no one is watching, copy and paste this in your profile.
You know what Mommy
You went to the doctor today.
I can hear that doctor again.
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
If you're against abortion, re-post this
I got this of of another profile if you take the time to read anything let it be these three poems.
My name is sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren't ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long
When I awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren't home.
When my mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll get just
One whipping tonight
Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie's Bar.
I hear him curse
My name he calls
I press myself
Against the wall.
I try and hide
From his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm sradishing to cry.
He finds me weeping
He shouts ugly words,
He says its my fault
That he suffers at work.
He slaps me and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And I run for the door.
He's already locked it
And I sradish to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall.
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken.
"I'm sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into unimaginable hate.
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
Oh please God, have mercy!
Oh please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor.
My name is Sarah
And I am but three,
Tonight my daddy,
Put this in your profile if you think that child abuse is wrong.
Her name was Auroura
Her dad was a drunk
Her only friend
She always talked to it
Until her parents
A bruise on her leg
But she grabs her bear
She sits in the corner
Such a bad life
Then one night
Then her mom suddenly
She thrust the blade
The mom walked out
Police showed up
One officer slowly
It must have been bad
If you hate child abuse, post this on your profile!!
IF YOU IGNORE THIS WITHOUT READING IT YOU HAVE NO HEART...BUT IF YOU FIND YOU CANNOT STOP UNTIL YOU REACH THE END THEN YOU MUST HAVE A VERY BIG HEART.
Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school
Now you have two choices
Friend: calls your parents by Mr. and Mrs.
Friend: has never seen you cry. Best Friend: has always had the best shoulder to cry on.
Friend: comes and visits you in jail.
Friend: never asks for anything to eat or drink
Friend: picks you up when you fall
Friend: asks you to write down your number.
Friend: borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
Friend: only knows a few things about you
Friend: will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing
Friend: would delete this letter
Number your twelve favorite Naruto characters (in no particular order) and answer the following questions:
2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
3. If Twelve got Eight pregnant?
4. Do you recall any fan-fics about Nine?
5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?
6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten?
7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
8. Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fanfic.
9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort fic.
11. What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to de-flower One?
12. Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
13. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
14. Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
15. What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
16. If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?
17. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?
18. What might be a good pick-up line for Ten to use on Two?
19. How might Eleven describe a relationship between Two and Eight?
20. How emo is Seven?
A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
Copy this onto your site and help stop racism!
If you have a wild imagination and it seems that no one appreciates it or doesnt have an imagination for squat, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you believe that preps travel in packs then place this on your profile.
If you hear voices in your head and know that they are real put this on your profile.
If you think that being unique is better than being cool then put this on your profile.
If you have mean teachers who you think act like idiots sometimes and make stupid jokes,copy and paste this into your profile
If you hate homework,copy and paste this into your profile.
SPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! If you are really random put this on your profile.
If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!
If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile:D
If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile
If you hate those obnoxious preppy people PLEASE copy this in your profile
If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever busted a move/ burst into song, copy and paste this into your profile.
IF your family memebers are really really retarded, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you agree that I have way to many of these, copy and paste this in your profile.
You know you live in 2007 when...
1.) You accidentaly enter your password on a microwave.
2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years
3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have MSN or Myspace
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV
6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) You were too busy to notice number 5.
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.
11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.
12.) Now you are thinking, "I have to put this on my profile!"
13.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.
-If you're gonna be two-faced, sweetie at least make one of them pretty.
-All work and no play means you will die in seven days... dun dun duuun
-I run with scissors; it makes me feel dangerous
-Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
-they say "guns dont kill people, people kill people.' Well, i think the gun helps, cuz if you just stood there and yelled BANG I dont think you'd kill too many people.
-so, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil?
-yeah, Im a loser. but the coolest loser you'll ever meet
-save the earth. it's the only planet with chocolate.
- I've heard that its possible to grow up. I've just never met anyone who's actually done it. (Besides, whats the fun in that?)
- No I won't go to hell! it has a restraining order against me
- You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me
-when Life gives you lemons, throw them back, because I mean really? Who likes lemons?
-when Life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.
-when Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then.
- love your enemies. it pisses them off
- oops! did my sarcasm hurt your feelings?
- i used to have an open mind, but my brains kept falling out
-I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind! but not my brain. I need that.
-life isnt passing me by; it's trying to run me over
-smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to
- i talk to myself because my answers are the only ones i accept!
- therapy is expensive. popping bubble wrap is cheap... you decide
-i like the idea of karma. you can go around and do bad things to people all day assuming they deserve it
- excuse me, have you seen my sanity? I think I lost it
-how long a minute is depends on which side of the bathroom door you're on
-if superman is bulletproof why does he duck when you throw the gun at him?
-if asteroids are in the hemisphere, and hemroids are on your ass, why are they named the way they are?
-if olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
-i live in my own little world. but it's ok, they know me there
-money can't buy happiness. it just buys everything you need to acheive it.
-three wise women would have stopped to ask for directions, got to the stable on time, helped deliver the baby, cleaned the stable, cooked the dinner, and there would have been peace on earth
-the dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide
-your weirdness is creeping out my imaginary friend
-tell the truth and run
-if electricity comes from electrons, where do you think morality comes from? (Hehe MORONS! For those of you who didn't figure it out)
-Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking creatures?
-if everything seems to be going well, you've obviously overlooked something
-you cry, i cry. you laugh, i laugh. you jump of a cliff, i laugh even harder
-a good friend will always bail you out of jail. a best friend is sitting there next to you saying 'man that was fun!'
-education is important. school however, is another matter.
-i used to be normal... until i met those freaks i call my friends (true, true)
-it's not just your family. It's the whole idea of... you know. they're always telling you what to do and what not to do, and its not conductive to a creative atmosphere!
-Joey ate my last stick of gum. So I killed him... do you think that was wrong?
-all right, all right. If you have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timings right... and thats what deathbeds are for
- the man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on
- I got you a present; it's a CD. I hope you haven't got it, because I don't have a receipt... and I didn't exactly buy it
"I am disinclined to aqquest to your requiest"- Captain Barbosa, "pirates of the Carribean
MURPHY'S LESSER-KNOWN LAWS:
1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright
until you hear them speak.
4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something
right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong.
7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be
stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the
11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12
people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
Why don't you ever see the headline: "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
Why is the name for the fear of long words, hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia, so long?
Why Doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating student as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear it up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, "oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you."
Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
Best Friend: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions
Friend: Will help me learn to drive
Best Friend: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance
Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away
Best Friend: Won't let me go away
Friend: Will help me up when I fall down
Best Friend: Will point and laugh because she tripped me
Friend: Will go to a concert with me
Best Friend: Will kidnap the band with me
Friend: Hides me from the cops
Best Friend: is probably the reason they are after me in the first place
Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public
Best Friend: Is up there with me making an idiot out of herself too.
Best Friends: Are 4 Ever
"Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?” Anonymous
"Heaven doesn't want me and hell is afraid I'll take over." Anonymous
"When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back." Anonymous
"Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it." Anonymous
"Sometimes, people just build walls up not to keep others out, but to see who cares enough to break through." Anonymous
"I'm the kind of person that walks into a door and apologizes." Anonymous
"Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door..." Anonymous
"Most people learn by observation, and there are the few who learn by experimentation. And then there are those who actually TOUCH the fire to see if it's really hot." –Anonymous
"Never explain--your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway." -Elbert Hubbard
364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that?
"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes."
"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most."
Friends will always be like "well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days"
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!
Charm is a way of getting the answer yes without asking a clear question.
All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as they go by.
Whose cruel idea was it for the words 'lisp' to have an 's' in it?
How is it possible to have a civil war?
When French people swear do they say pardon my English?
If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?
One way to figure out how things work, push all the buttons!
When I say LOL I'm not laughing out loud. I just have nothing better to say.
When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Sing "I'm Off to See the Wizard" when sent to the Headmasters office.
I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.
You're just jealous because we act retarded in public and people still love us!
I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.
I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
'If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.'
'I can picture in my minds eye a world without war, a world without hate, and I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it-...'
'I believe everybody in the world should have guns. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket launchers too. I believe that all citizens should have their weapons of choice. However, I also believe that only I should have ammunition. Because frankly, I wouldn't trust the rest of the goobers with anything more dangerous than string.'
-Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!
-The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.
-Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe.
-Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.
-What happens if you get scared half to death twice? That's a really good question...i wonder...
-I was thinking, while I was running...
About not hitting trees, I hope.
-The key to getting your mother to shut up!! IT'S BEEN SOLVED!! Here it is:
Roses are red,
If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
-I had a friend once, but then the rope broke and he got away.
A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much?"
A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.
A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run -bitch - run!"
A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.
98 percent of teenagers have or are smoking. If you are part of the 2 percent that are not.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. - Unknown
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." Douglas Adams
"The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing." - Dizzy Dean
don't regret doing things, regret getting caught
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach him how to fish and you get rid of him all weekend. - Zenna Schaffer
Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried. - Mae West
If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.
The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!
If you can read that please put it in your profile.
Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers from the people that got there first?
If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?
Can a fire truck park in the fire lane?
"Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute?
Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time?
Are marbles made of marble?
Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?
If you pay for a vacation and your plane crashes on the way there, do you get you money back? (Granted you lived)
Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"? xD
Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"? xD
Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
Can you get cornered in a round room?
Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?
Why don't the hairs on your arms get split ends?
Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?
In that song, she'll be coming around the mountain, who is she?
How come we say 'It's colder than hell outside' when isn't it realistically always colder than hell since hell is supposed to be fire and brimstone?
Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it becomes extra tempting to eat?
Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?
Wouldn't it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?
Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable but not on regular television? Don't they want the people without cable to buy the cable?
"Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?"
What happens if you put this side up face down while popping microwave popcorn?
Why is chopsticks one of the easiest songs to play on the piano, but the hardest thing to eat with?
How come you play at a recital, but recite at a play?
If heat rises, then shouldn't hell be cold?
Why is there that little space inside strawberries, as if it was meant for a pit, and then the seeds are on the outside?
Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa
Do they have girl’s bathrooms in gay bars?
Why is toilet bowl cleaning liquid only blue?
Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?
Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?
Why can't you get a tan on your palms?
If your sick for one week and on one of those days they had to cancel school because of snow, do you have to make up that day in June?
Why do dogs sniff other dog’s bottoms to say hello, why don’t they just bark in their face or something?
Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been
If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it?
You know the expression, "Don't quit your day job?" Well what do you say to
Which way does a compass point in space?
Why are people allowed to put naked statues outside but why can't we run outside naked?
Why do all superheroes wear spandex?
If mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?
If a missing person sees their picture on a milk carton that offers a reward, would they get the money?
If the president were gay, would his husband be the first man?
If you were a genie and a person asked you this wish, "I wish you would not grant me this wish" what would you do?
Why aren't safety pins as safe as they say they are?
Can bald men get lice??
Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the Universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a chair has wet paint on it, and he'll have to touch it to be sure.
If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
WHO DOES THE WORK??
Who's working anyway?
The population of this country is 300 million.
160 million are retired.
That leaves 140 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school.
Which leaves 55 million to do the work.
Of this there are 35 million employed by the federal government.
Leaving 15 million to do the work.
2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama
Which leaves 12.2 million to do the work.
Take from that total the 10.8 million people who work for state and city
And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals.
Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work.
You and me.
And there you are,
At your computer, reading jokes.
"What the duece?" Stewie Griffin(Family Guy)
-Stupidity killed the cat. Curiousity was framed.
-Some people are alive today, simply because it is illegal to kill them.
-I used all my sick days, so I called in dead...
-The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese!
-When in doubt, make up words!
-Home is not where you live, but where they understand you.
-If at first you don't succeed, Then skydiving isn't for you!
-You say I'm not cool. Cool is just another word for cold. If I'm not Cold then I'm Hot. I know I'm Hot. Thank You for embracing it!
-Come to the dark side, we have cookies!
-One day we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject
-Give a person a fish and feed them for a day, teach them how to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks!
-the statistics of insanty is that 1 of every 4 people have a mental illness. Look at your three best friends, if they're ok, then it's you! (...No, we're all insane. They made me that way!!)
-When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.
-A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work.
-There is no "I" in team but there is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM...
where we are headed...
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
Why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows 98?
Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
Why the man who invests all your money is called a "Broker"?
Why there isn't mouse flavored cat food?
Who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?
Why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?
Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the indestructible black box?
Why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?
Why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?
- Draco Malfoy the amazing...bouncing...Ferret.
- Remus Lupin does NOT want a flee collar
- I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his time of the month.
- Dear Harry, I hate you, Love Voldy
-Professer Flitwick's name is not Yoda
-I will not bring a magic eight ball to Divination class
-If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of the situation and draw a Dark Mark on their arm
-Neville: OMG I killed Harry Potter
(somewhere in the distance)
Voldemort: Nooooo! I wanted to do it! sob
-I stalked a death eater and all i got was this lousy potions master!
-I am not allowed to make lightsaber sounds with my wand
-I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing
-I will not follow potions intstructions in reverse order just to see what happens
evaded death eaters...
killed by drapery.
A good friend helps you up when you fall down. A best friend laughs and trips you again. Or sits on you back and forces you to stay down...
A good freind never asks for anything to eat or drink. A best freind Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.
A good freind Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. A best freind Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!
A good freind Asks you to write down your number. A best freind Has you on speed dial.
A good freind Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. A best freind Loses your junk and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
A good freind Only know a few things about you. A best freind Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
A good freind Would knock on your front door. A best freind will Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."
A good freind is only through school/college. A best freind is for life.
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer
Drugs are bad news. Spread the word.Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy this into your profile
Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile.
If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever shouted out the first thing that comes to mind, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever shouted out random thing and then gotten glared at copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have sudden mood changes out of nowhere copy and paste this into your profile.
98 percent of teenagers drink or have been around alcohol, put this in your profile if you like MUFFINS!
If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
"It'll take time to restore chaos."(well, if you wanted to do it properly...)
"I know that human beings and fish can co-exist peacefully."(well, we have been for centuries, we catch them , and put them back, or eat them. let's keep up the good work, we could win a medal!)
"I won't be a lame duck unless of course Cheney shoots me in the leg."(no, you'd be a lame president, not a duck.)
"It's a one fingered victory salute."(okay, just out of mild curiosity, who flips a camera the bird? espacially while said camera may be rolling, LIVE)
If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similiar, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you have ever slapped your self on the head and/or banged your head on a table for no reason put this on your profile
If you have siblings that drive you crazy then copy this onto your profile.
If you think that if girls should rule the world and it would be a better place then copy this onto your profile.
Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them as much.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?
Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
There are three sides to any argument: your side, my side and the right side.
An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance?
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
I like work. It fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.
If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
Where there's a will, there are five hundred relatives.
Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die
I don't care if you're gay or straight, everybody needs love.
Good FRIENDS are hard to find,
Harder to leave,
And IMPOSSIBLE to forget,
is like a four-leaf clover,
Hard to find,
And lucky to have,
Are the sibilings,
God forgot to give us,
True friendship NEVER ends,
Friends are FOREVER,
Most people walk in and out of your life,
But only TRUE FRIENDS leave footprints in your heart.
Think About It...
if you blow in a dogs face he'll get mad at you, but take him for a car ride, and the first thing he does is stick his head out the window!
if two wrongs dont make a right, try three
apparently 1 in 5 people are chinese, there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. it's ether my mum or dad. or my older brother steven. or my younger sister ho-chan-chu. but i think it's steven.
there are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & and those that cant.
if quitters never win, and winners never quit, how can it be good to 'quit while your ahead?'
if a fork were made of gold would it still be called silver ware?
Can you make a candle out of your earwax?
If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.
I hate cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.
If you've ever read or started to read a chapter in a fanfiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
If you ever forgot your name, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc, and the people who kill the animals but don't use the meat, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you secretly believe (and hope) that J.K.R. is really a Hogwarts alumni pretending it is fictional, copy this into your profile.
If you blame a failing grade on A) the teacher hating you, B) being Confounded, C) anything but the fact that you didn't study, copy this into your profile.
If you live in an imaginary world where Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, Sirius Black, Fred Weasley, Hedwig, Albus Dumbledore, Cedric Diggory, Mad-Eye Moody, Severus Snape, Colin Creevey, Dobby, and hey, while I'm at it, Lily and James, did NOT die and they lived forever and ever and ever and were always happy and were finished with anguish, turmoil and agony, then copy and paste this into your profile!
If you wish you were the creator of Harry Potter, copy this into your profile.
If you wish that your name was as interesting as Scorpius Malfoy, Sirius Black, Gellert Grindelwald, Lavender Brown, Ginerva Weasley, Albus Severus Potter or anything like Nymphadora, Andromeda, Narcissa or Bellatrix, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile. (from the profile of xNymphadoraxTonksx)
SEVERUS SNAPE IS GOOD! I STAND BY MY GREASY HARIED POTIONS MASTER! POST THIS IN YOUR PROFILE AND SPREAD THE TRUTH!
(') This, over here, is my amazing candle. I am lighting it to commerate the deaths of those 32 lives that were lost at Virginia Tech(from the profile of An-Jelly-Ca)
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuudge! If you are really random put this on your profile.
"I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better." - A. J. Liebling
"I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters." - Frank Lloyd Wright
"Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse." Thomas Szasz
"There is a fine line between genius and insanity I have erased this line." - Oscar Levant
"Public speaking is the art of diluting a two minute speech with a two hour vocabulary." - Evan Esar
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." - Thomas Alva Edison
"I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx
"We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time." - Vince Lombardi
A Dads Poem
Her hair was up in a pony tail, her favorite dress tied with a bow.
Today was Daddy's Day at school, and she couldn't wait to go. But her mommy tried to tell her, that she probably should stay home.
Why the kids might not understand, if she went to school alone.
But she was not afraid; she knew just what to say. What to tell her classmates of why he wasn't there today. But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone. And that was why once again, she tried to keep her daughter home.
But the little girl went to school eager to tell them all. About a dad she never sees a dad who never calls. There were daddies along the wall in back, for everyone to meet.
Children squirming impatiently, anxious in their seats. one by one the teacher called a student from the class. To introduce their daddy, as seconds slowly passed.
At last the teacher called her name, every child turned to stare. each of them was searching, for a man who wasn't there.
"Where's her daddy at?" she heard a boy call out.
"She probably doesn't have one," another student dared to shout.
And from somewhere near the back, she heard a daddy say, "Looks like another deadbeat dad, too busy to waste his day."
The words did not offend her, she smiled up at her Mom and looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on.
And with hands behind her back, slowly she began to speak. And out from the mouth of a child, came words incredibly unique.
"My Daddy couldn't be here, because he lives so far away. But I know he wishes he could be, since this is such a special day. And though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know. All about my daddy, and how much he loves me so. He loved to tell me stories, he taught me to ride my bike. He surprised me with pink roses, and taught me to fly a kite. We used to share fudge sundaes, and ice cream in a cone. And though you cannot see him. I'm not standing here alone. "Cause my daddy's always with me, even though we are apart I know because he told me, he'll forever be in my heart"
With that, her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest. Feeling her own heartbeat, beneath her favorite dress. And from somewhere in the crowd of dads, her mother stood in tears. Proudly watching her daughter, who was wise beyond her years. For she stood up for the love of a man not in her life. Doing what was best for her, doing what was right. And when she dropped her hand back down, staring straight into the crowd. She finished with a voice so soft, but its message clear and loud.
"I love my daddy very much, he's my shining star. And if he could, he'd be here, but heaven's just too far. You see he was a fireman and died just this past year when airplanes hit the towers and taught Americans to fear. But sometimes when I close my eyes, it's like he never went away."
And then she closed her eyes, and saw him standing there that day. And to her mother’s amazement, she witnessed with surprise. A room full of daddies and children, all starting to close their eyes. Who knows what they saw before them, who knows what they felt inside. Perhaps for merely a second, they saw him at her side.
"I know you're with me Daddy," to the silence she called out.
And what happened next made believers, of those once filled with doubt. Not one in that room could explain it, for each of their eyes had been closed. But there on the desk beside her, was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose.
And a child was blessed, if only for a moment, by the love of her shining star. And given the gift of believing, that heaven is never too far.
‘They’ say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.
Send this to the people you'll never forget and remember to send it also to the person that sent it to you. It's a short message to let them know that you'll never forget them. If you don't send it to anyone, it means you're in a hurry and that you've forgotten your friends.
Take the time...to live and love. Until eternity. May you be blessed.
Bushisms(or Bush quotes.) If this offends anyone I'm sorry, but I just think Bush isn't a great president, I don't really hate him, but he his kinda... mistake prone. I personally thinks he's a rather funny man( when he says stupid stuff). So, without further ado(or boredom by moi), some hilarious quotes by our funniest president to date.
"A dictatorship would be a heck of a lot easier, there's no question about it." (but aren't you supposed to be ruling a democray...)
"Our nation must come together to unite." (nope, we have to split apart.)
"I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn't here."(ummm, isn't that kinda hard to do, or do you have super extendable ears? ])
"They want the federal goverment to control Social Security like it's some sort of federal program."(okay, maybe the speech writer should be fired.)
"She's a west-Texas girl, just like me."(okay, he's talking about some business assciates wife, who's from Texas, I just didn't know that he was a girl)
"It's your money, you paid for it."(okay, if we paid for it, that would make it someone else's money, not ours.)
"War's a dangerous place."(nope, it's a magical forest filled with bunnies and tea, and cookies.)
"During these last few months, I've been trained by Al Quida"(well, that would certainly explain the lack of catching certain terrorists...)
"I call upon all nations to to do whatever they can to stop these terrorist killers. Thank you, now watch this drive."(ummm, that would sorta defeat the purpose of looking for the terrorists, but dude concentrate on the reporter, not your golf score!)
9/11 changed the United States of America forever. Copy and paste this onto your profile if you agree.
If you are a pscyopath,freak,goth,punk,headbanger,gang banger,skater and/or emo copy this into your profile and add your name: Kalypso0Fox,
If you are crazy and /or insane and proud of it copy and paste this into your profile and add your name: Kalypso-Fox,
If you like the cold and to walk in the moonlight,copy this onto your profile and add your name: Kalypso-Fox,
If you like vampires,copy this onto your profile (WOOH GO VAMPRES!! YEAH!!) and add your name: Kalypso-Fox,
If you are a true klutz and have tripped countless times out of your own stupidity whether it be you tripped over your own two feet or you accidently ran into a wall, copy and paste this in your profile and add you name: Kalypso-Fox,
If you have fallen deeply in love with the name Edward, Anthony, or Masen copy this in your profile and add your name: Kalypso-Fox,
I've probably put a lot of things on my profile on it more then once, maybe even more then twice. If you have ever written or typed something up more then once or twice copy and paste this on your profile.
If you copied so many things off this list that your fingers are tired then don't copy and paste anymore, BAKA!
Yea I know I have alot of things on this. I just cant ignore them!
Anyway, if you took the time to read all this, thank you very much. And enjoy my stories! - Kalypso Fox
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