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Why Homosexual Marriage should be made illegal
1) Being homosexual is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction, and air conditioning.
2) Homosexual marriage will encourage people to be homosexual , in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3) Legalizing homosexual marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks are still slaves that can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if homosexual marriages were allowed; the sanctity of those 55-hour just-for-fun marriages, the marriages you get into while in a drunken stupor, the ones the end would be destroyed.
6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Homosexual couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7) Obviously homosexual parents will raise homosexual children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8) Homosexual marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10) Homosexual marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans...
SUPPORT HOMOSEXUAL MARRIAGE!!
All those who play on the field will have tasted defeat.
There's no player in this world who has not lost before.
However, the best players will give everything to stand up again.
Ordinary players take a while to get back on their feet.
While losers will remain flat on the field
- University of Texas Longhorns Headcoach, Darrell Royal