Author has written 16 stories for Warriors, House of Night, Twilight, Vampires, and Vampire Academy.
I am in DESPERATE need of a Beta. Please help )=
Fav. color: hot pink, lime green, and orange.
What i like: Books. Boys. Typical nerdy teenage stuff =P
My favorite books: Gosh..incredibly hard to say..I'm really into paranormal romance stuff right now.
Fav. Tv shows/movies: Twilight, Gossip Girl, Corner Gas, and random other shows/movies
Religion: I don't have a religion. Shocking I know. But I really just don't believe. Pm me if you would like to know more.
A little bit about me: I have a tendancy for sarcastic remarks and I am brutally honest. I also tend to randomly disapear for amounts of time.. I also would have no problem helping review your stories. I'm addicted to books and music. I'm only 15 so between school and all the drama -_- that involves I may not be able to update as much as I would like. I also LOVE reviews, they're usually my inspiration to continue updating (= I love giving them too!
Bella's Crest hoodie (Twilight I now, but I had to okay?)
Bella's... not sure what to call it. (the one that she didn't know what it was)
Bella's Green nailpolish
Twilight Without one black
Chapter 12: Painting
My opinion on warrior characters.
Leafpool. I mean really who wouldn't love a smart medicien cat?
Sandstorm. GIRL POWER!!
SpottedLeaf. She loved firepaw/heart/star and was devoted to being a medicine cat
Yellowfang. I love her attitude
Tigerstar. I mean really he would do ANYTHING for power and he's evil.
OK warrior characters:
Firestar. I mean he lost his spunk in the second series.
Nightcloud. She fought against her Clan mates and then took a mate in Crowfeather?
My fave Silverwing Characters
Carnassial. My evil side again. He rocks. (darkwing)
Panthera. like sandstorm she wanted to be loyal to her leader and Carnassial. (Firestar) (darkwing)
Goth. He is so cool.
Fav. Inkheart/Inkspell/Inkdeath characters
Farid. he is so sweet...Meggie was stupid to reject him
Meggie. She rocks. Is better in Inkspell than Inkheart...and totally sucked in Inkdeath
Dustfinger. AWESOME CHARACTER
Basta. I hate him for what he did to Dustfinger but other than that...
Resa and Mo. ...I like them but...
Roxane. She is sweet
Twilight Characters. I love em all...exept for a certain Werewolf. CoughJacobCough
Edward: ...I'm all for Edward Cullen. Whoots!
Bella: I really wish i could be Bella i love her, but I don't want her happy ending. She can have it. I'll just have to find my own...sigh
Alice: I love Alice Cullen!
Emmet, Jasper and Rosalie: I love them all
Esme, Carlisle: they're awesome
Jacob Black: I HATE with with a passion in the books! But the movies...
Victoria, James: I love them, exept for the whole want to kill Bella part...
Laurent: oh my!! he is totally right for his part!
Seth: Aww, Seth.
Leah: I really like Leah
Quil, Embrey, Paul, Jared. And other members of pack: I like all WereWolves exept one CoughJacobCough
Sam: I really like sam
Kim: Don't know much about her to like her or hate her...
Reenesemey?: She can go sleep in the dog house with her stupid old Werewolf. Yeah that's right!
Fav. Warrior pairs
LeafxCrow: they'd be perfect
SquirrelxBramble: i mean really two cats that STarClan aprove of
SandxFire: Perfect pair
Fav. Silverwing/Darkwing pairs
CarnassialxPanther: it sad that they had to die.
Fav Inkheart/Inkspell/Inkdeath pairs
FaridxMaggie:they are perfect together
ResaxMo: again ...
RoxanexDustfinger: they are perfect
MeggiexDoria: I do not like him
Fav. Twilight pairs
BellaxEdward: perfect for each other
JamesxVictoria: they totally go together...it's a shame they had to die...it would be really if they didn't threaten Bella i would feel sad for them
Now that Vancouver will host the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions people from all over the world are asking.
Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? ( England )
Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? ( USA )
Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto - can I follow the Railroad tracks? ( Sweden )
Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada ? ( Sweden )
Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada ? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto , Vancouver , Edmonton and Halifax ? ( England )
Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? ( USA )
Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? ( USA )
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada ? ( England )
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )
Q: Do you have perfume in Canada ? ( Germany )
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada ? ( USA )
Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? ( Italy )
Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada ? ( USA )
Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. ( USA )
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )
Please send this on to any Canadian (or others) who you think will enjoy it as much as I did.
ADog's Purpose(from a 6-year-old).
Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.
I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.
As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.
The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.
The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives. Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, 'I know why.'
Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation.
He said, 'People are born so that they can learn how to live a good Life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?' The Six-year-old continued, 'Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.'
Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.
Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.
On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Never pretend to be something you're not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.
Mentally ill test:
x You have screamed at an inanimate object for 'hurting you.'
x You know that it IS possible to lick your elbow.
TOTAL : 10
You have seen the Matrix and still don't get it.
x You have fallen asleep in class.
x You use your fingers to do simple math.
You have posted bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen if you don't.
GRAND TOTAL: 28 , O.o
NOW, take your total, and multiply it by 4.
-I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS!
-If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
-Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
-Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
-Guns don’t kill people. Bullets kill people.
-You can shatter my heart but I will love you with all the little pieces.
-Trying is the first step toward failure
-A friend would bail you out of jail. A best friend will be sitting next to you in the cell saying "That was fun"
If you think that Twilight is the best book known to woman (and man)...copy and paste this onto your profile.
I hate school shootings so here. . .
Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school
He told his friends that it was cool
And when he pulled the trigger back
It shot with a great crack
Mummy I was a good girl
I did what I was told
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold
But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye
I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry
When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another
And all because he got the gun from his older brother
Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much
And please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush
And tell my little sister that she is the only one now
And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best
Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest
Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class
And never to forget this and please don't let this pass
Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this
Mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss
And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try
I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry
Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest
But mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest
Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack
Mummy listen to me if you would
I wanted to go to college
I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with daddy
On that trip to the new zoo
I wanted to get married
I wanted to have a kid
I wanted to be an actress
Mummy I wanted to live
But mummy I must go now
The time is getting late
Mummy tell my Chris
I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date
I love you mummy I always have
I know you know it's true
Mummy all I wanted to say is "Mummy I love you"
In memory of the Columbian students that were lost
I went to a party,
My name is Chris
My daddy so mad?
Her name was Auroura
Her dad was a drunk
Her only friend
She always talked to it
Until her parents
A bruise on her leg
But she grabs her bear
She sits in the corner
Such a bad life
Then one night
Then her mom suddenly
She thrust the blade
The mom walked out
Police showed up
One officer slowly
It must have been bad
10 Commandments of a Teenager
1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
A simple friend wonders about your romantic history. A real friend could blackmail you with it!
My best friends are the kind that if my house were on fire, they'd be roasting marsh mellows and flirting with the firemen
comebacks to crappy pickup lines!-(Hilarious)
Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy:
Man: "Your body is like a temple."
Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you.
Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Man: "Your place or mine?"
Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Man: "But I don't know your name."
Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Man: "Is this seat empty?"
One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the local church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem: my husband keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing. What should I do?"
"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at specific times. When I motion, you give him a good poke in the leg."
In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mrs. Jones.
"Jesus!" Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the hatpin.
"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr. Jones nodded off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning towards Mrs. Jones.
"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.
"Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long, Mr. Jones had winked off again. However, this time, the minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few motions that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her husband with the hatpin again.
The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"
Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You stick that goddamned thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it up your ass!"
"Amen," replied the congregation.
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
19. My mother taught me ESP.
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
What a guy means, when he says some stuff-
“Oh, don’t fuss, I just cut myself, it’s not big deal.”
"It would take too long to "
9 Things I Hate About Everyone
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time…. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.
3. When people say “Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too”. Damn right! What good is cake if you can’t eat it?
4. When people say “it’s always the last place you look”. Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you’ve found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!
5. When people say while watching a film “did you see that?”. No Loser, I paid 12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.
6. People who ask “Can I ask you a question?”…. Didn’t really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
7. When something is ‘new and improved!’. Which is it? If it’s new, then there has never been anything before it. If it’s an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn’t be new.
8. When people say “life is short”. What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that’s longer?
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks “Has the bus come yet?”. If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?
A Twilight Survey
Which book in the series is your favorite?
uh, book one of Breaking Dawn! Well, besides the whole preg. part...
Eclipse...no Twilight it has almost no jacob freaking black
How long did it take you to read the books?
hmm, I read Eclipse, New Moon and Twilight in the course of 5 days. Breaking dawn 1 day.
Who introduced you to the books?
A Lady at the bookstore! I was getting other Vampire books and she recomended them!
Did you buy them, borrow them, or have them given to you as a gift?
bought em all.
Are you most looking forward to: Breaking Dawn, Midnight Sun, or the movie?
Midnight Sun. Breaking Dawn is out...or does New Moon count as the movie? Cuz if it does then that one.
What's your dream ending to the series?
Bella bights jacob freaking black and then kills reneseme
Who's your favorite vampire?
Who is your favorite werewolf?
SETH, Or LEAH
What's one of your favorite quotes from the stories?
Any part where Edward threatens to kill jacob freaking black.
What was your favorite Bella and Edward moment?
hmm, I liked dinner one in Twilight, When Edward comes back (Bella's house) in New Moon, When Edward tells Bella about his favorite nights Eclipse, and all of book one in Breaking Dawn
What was your favorite Bella and Jacob moment?
hmm...I don't know! Oh wait! When Bella punchees jacob freaking black!
How about your favorite Bella and Alice moment?
all of them I love Alice (in like well, a sisterly way
What was your favorite adventure/battle?
Whenever Edward threatens to kill jacob freaking black
Which book cover was your favorite?
Are these books among your favorite books of all?
This or That?
Twilight or New Moon?
New Moon or Eclipse?
Eclipse or Twilight?
Are you more excited about Breaking Dawn or Midnight Sun?
Midnight Sun or the Twilight Movie?
Midnight Sun, unless New Moon counts as the movie. then its the Movie
The Twilight Movie or Breaking Dawn?
Who do you want to see Bella with most: Edward or Jacob?
have you noticed I absolutly hate a certain Werewolf? so Edward
Who do you like more:
Bella or Edward?
Bella or Jacob?
Bella or Alice?
Alice or Jacob?
Rosalie or Alice?
Jasper or Alice?
Jasper or Edward?
Carlisle or Esme?
Emmett or Jasper?
Emmett or Jacob?
Bella or Rosalie?
Esme or Charlie?
Charlie or Carlisle?
Charlie or Billy?
Jacob or Sam?
Sam or Quil?
Quil or Embry?
Who's the better villain: James or Victoria?
Victoria. James goes and dies in the first book!
Werewolves or Vampires?
How did you first find out about the movie?
Are you excited?
Yeah! I totally was
What do you think of the casting so far?
they were awesome
Are you going to go see it?
me did me did
Planning on going with anyone in particular?
Do you think it will stay true to the book?
Breaking Dawn Speculation:
Are you planning on buying this book as soon as it's out?
Do you think Bella will be turned into a vampire finally?
Do you think she and Edward will get married?
Do you think Jacob might imprint in this book?
he did, now him and reneseme can go die
Who do you think Bella will end up with : Edward or Jacob?
she ended up with Edward.
Do you think it will be a happy, sad, or shocking ending?
Happy. Damn happy endings, though in this one I wanted a happy ending
Who do you think will be the villain(s) of the book this time?
the Volturi duh!
How would you feel about a possible vampire / werewolf cross?
hmm, as long as no jacob freaking black is invlolved I'm all for it!
Will Charlie find out Edward is a vampire?
he did! kinda.
Will the vampires and werewolves continue the truce they had in Eclipse?
If anyone, who do you think will die in this book?
I want...jacob freaking black to die
For a twist: what would you think if Edward was somehow turned human?
um...how could he?
Do you think Jacob will be over Bella by the end of the book?
ugh, yeah! He needs to stop living in the past
What do you most want to happen in Breaking Dawn?
jacob freaking black and renesme to die
What's your dream ending?
same as above
(A Few Last Things:)
In which book did you like Bella's character best?
How about Edward's?
um, I don't know
Twilight cuz he was hardly in!
All of them!
If it were possible...who would you most want to meet in person?
1.YOUR REAL NAME: Sianna
4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, and current street name): Paige (No street name!)
5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of mom's maiden name): Moesiski
6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink): Orange Blackcherry
7. YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd letter of your dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, last letter of your moms middle name): Iegyeke (?)
16 ways to maintain a Healthy level of insanity.
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars, see if they slow down.
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."
FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"
FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.
BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.
FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"
FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.
BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.
FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.
BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.
FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.
BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"
FRIENDS: Will help you move.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.
FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.
FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up!
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.
FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!
FRIENDS: Would read ignore this.
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this crap!
Jacob Black glared at the children dressed as vampires and he knew it wasn't right when he lied and told them there was no candy left.
OMC-Since Edward is a perfict angel, and God created angels, and Carlisle created Edward, into a vampire, so God is Carlisle. that and every one of us woke up, saw Carlisle, and thought he was God.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. But if the doctor is cute, screw the fruit! (OMC! Carlisle!)
Officer, I swear to drunk I'm not God!
Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee getting bigger?" Then it hit me.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
"A conclusion is the part where you got tired of thinking."
"At my lemonade stand I used to give away the first glass for free, and charge five dollars for the refill. It contained the antidote."
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
"Don't criticize my mess unless you'd like to become part of it."
"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as they fly by."
Fake is the new trend. I guess everyone’s in style.
I didn’t say that it was your fault…I said I was going to blame you.
Copying from a single source is called plagarism, copying from multiple source is called research.
"Maybe this world is another planet's hell."
"To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit, the target."
Do not run in the school hall, gliding is more fun.
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.
I had a friend once. Then the rope broke and he got away.
I like you. When I rule the world, your death shall be quick and painless.
Isn't it funny that the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'?
The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.
I used to care, but I take a pill for that now.
Always forgive your enemies- nothing annoys them so much.
Of course it's in the last place you look for it. Why in hell would you keep looking for it if you already found it!?
Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."
The problem with political jokes is that very often they get elected.
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.
Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.
Did you just call me a bitch? Well a bitch is a dog, and dogs bark, bark is on trees, trees are part of nature, nature is beautiful. So yeah, thanks for the compliment.
I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.
I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends.
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.
When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.
There are three kinds of people in the world; ones that can count and ones that can't.
I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.
They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.
If your heart was really broken...you'd be dead, so shut up.
-Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS
"Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss."
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?!
The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.
I'm not ALWAYS late. Sometimes i just don't show up.
You're not yourself today. I noticed the improvement immediately.
When there's a will, I want to be in it.
I'm not prejudiced. I hate everyone equally.
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean that they're not out to get you.
Remember what you just said, because tomorrow I am going to have a witty and sarcastic comeback and you'll be devastated then!
WHAT TO DO IN AN EXAM YOU KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO FAIL ANYWAYS:
1. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"
2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
3. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.
4. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.
5. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.
6. 15 min. into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every 15 min.
7. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.
9. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.
10. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.
11. Every 5 min. stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.
12. Turn in the exam approx. 30 min. into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.
14. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (ie. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink.)
15. Show up completely drunk (completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).
16. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.
17. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 min, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.
18. If the exam is math/sciences related, make up the longest proofs you could possible think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.
19. Try to get people in the room to do a wave.
21. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.
22. Puke into your exam booklet. Hand it in. Leave.
23. Take 6 packages of rice cakes to the exam. Stuff at least 2 rice cakes into your mouth at once. Chew, then cough. Repeat if necessary.
25. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About 5 min into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"
26. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up!
27. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.
28. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"
29. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.
30. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.
31. In the middle of the test, have a friend rush into the classroom, tag your hand, and resume taking your test for you. When the teacher asks what's going on, calmly explain the rules of Tag Team Testing to him/her.
32. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."
33. Stand up after about 15 minutes, and say loudly, "Okay, let's double-check our answers! Number one, A. Number two, C. Number three, E..."
35. Wear a superman outfit under your normal clothes. 30 minutes into the exam, jump up and answer your phone, shouting "What? I'm on my way!!". rip off your outer clothes and run out of the room. strike a pose first for added effect.
36. Tailgate outside the classroom before the exam.
38. Bring a giant cockroach into the room and release it on a girl nearby.
39. Complete the exam with everything you write being backwards at a 90 degree angle.
40. Bring one pencil with a very sharp point. Break the point off your paper. Sharpen the pencil. Repeat this process for one hour.
41. Make Strange noises... get people to stare... look at the person next to you as if heshe did it.
42. Dress like the professor.
44. Use Invisible Ink to answer the whole exam.
45. Order catering. The catering company should come in about halfway through the test, and should include at least three waiters, eight carts of food, and five candelabras.
Random Funny Junk (well it's funny to me)
When life hands you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.
When life hands you lemons, throw 'em back and demand Edward (or Jasper lol)
Don't try anything, oboists carry knives
Save the orchestra...tune the oboes
Forgive your enemies - it messes with their heads :P
If all the world's a stage, then why do I keep falling in the orchestra pit?
I wouldn't have OCD if everyone else would just do things the right way.
Your shin (n): a device used to find furniture in the dark
Alice in Wonderland Oh! Is that the story of Alice before she went into the Asylum?
People that don't know me think I'm quiet. People that do wish I was.
Sarcasm. It's easier than actually having to deal with stupid people.
If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
Pointless Things to Copy and Paste into your Profile!
If you think that TWILGHT is the best book known to woman (and man)...copy and paste this to your profile.
If you try to control your thoughts because Edward might hear them, copy and paste to your profile.
If you are a walking, talking Twilight series encyclopedia and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have spent a whole day reading Twilight/New Moon/Eclipse, without any food, copy and paste this to your profile.
You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volturi" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done just that, copy this into your profile.
If you have so many dreams about Twilight that you have lost count, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever burst out laughing about something in a book, and people look at you wierd, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have a tendency to talk/sing to yourself copy and paste this to your profile.
Have you ever tried having a thumb war with yourself?? I have. (I found that I'm a very tough opponent.) If you have just tried having a thumb war with yourself, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you find Spongebob funny SOMETIMES, but most of the time he is SO annoying you want to throw the TV out the window, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you absolutely are TERRIFIED of spiders, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever pulled on a door that said push, or vise versa, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever stayed up past 2 in the morning reading, copy and paste this on your profile. (More like all night! :D)
If random songs pop into your head for no apparent reason, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan fictions, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you think that Writer's Block blows, copy and paste this to your profile.
Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
People say that I'm weird, but I think that weird is strange, and strange is odd, and odd is different, and different is unique, and everyone is unique, so unique is normal, so therefore I am normal. If the same is true for you, copy this onto your profile!
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this to your profile.
If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this to your profile.
If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile XD
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you are reading this line, copy and paste it in ur profile.
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.
If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you are not sure if you find these 'copy and paste things' annoying or if you love them, copy and paste this on your profile.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Say the word "cow" before each word:
Now say the word "cow" after each word:
Now say the word "cow" before and after each word:
Now read from the bottom up:
Why America has some Issues
1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'
10. Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering.
Cold is Relative!
60 above zero: Floridians turn on the heat.
50 above zero: Californians shiver uncontrollably.
40 above zero: Italian & English cars won't start.
32 above zero: Distilled water freezes.
20 above zero: Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
15 above zero: New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
Zero: People in Miami all die.
10 below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico
25 below zero: Hollywood disintegrates.
40 be low zero: Washington DC runs out of hot air.
100 below zero:Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
459.67 F below zero (absolute zero, Zero on the Kelvin scale): ALL atomic motion stops
500 below zero:Hell freezes over
TWILIGHT THINGS! XD
I have OCD: Obsessive Cullen Disorder.
I thought I had found my Edward Cullen... but it was just another idiot with fangs.
TWILIGHT: noun, 1. period between afternoon and nighttime 2. the first textually transmitted disease.
Edward Cullen killed Bambi's mom.
I like my men cold, dead and sparkling.
Twilight, twilight, twilight, twilight, twilight, twilight. What obsession?
Oh, for Fork's sake.
YOU REALLY KNOW YOU'VE REACHED THE POINT OF NO RETURN, AND ARE TOTALLY OBSESSED WITH TWILIGHT, WHEN YOU WATCH WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, JUST IN CASE SOMEONE CAN HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS.
Lessons Learned in Twilight:
CULLENISM: my new religion.
WIWAVS: Wishing I was a vampire syndrome.
7 Reasons Not to Mess with Children (small children)
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
Live as you want to be remembered, for people remember how you treated them more than anything else.
Love knows no gender, age, or color. If you believe this, copy and paste this into your profile.
Racism is wrong and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image - five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message.
I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: Iheartjake1220, FaerieRose13, Dancer4Life15,Marigold Winters, SparklingTopazEyes, chocoholic4eva, Kyleena
List ten Twilight characters in no particular order.
1. Seth Clearwater
2. Leah Clearwater
3. Alice Cullen
4. Demitiri? of the Vultrui
5. Bella Swan/Cullen
6. Jasper Cullen/Hale
7. Edward Cullen
8. Rosalie Cullen/Hale
9. Emmett Cullen
10. Charlie Swan
1. Have you read a five/ten fic before?
uh, well Charlie is Bella's dad...
2. Do you think three is hot? How hot?
Uh, Alice...I'm female and am not gay or lez or anything like that so no.
3. What would happen if six got one pregnant?
Jasper getting Seth pregnant would probably be hard...and with the fact that jasper is a vamp and seth is a wolf..
4. Do you recall any good fics about nine?
5. Would seven and two make a good couple?
Ed ward and Leah? Well, sure
6. Four/eight or four/nine?
I'd have to say Dimitri and Rose
7. What would happen if seven discovered three and eight in a secret relationship?
ooooh... that would not be good.
8. Make a summary of at least twenty words for a two/six fic.
Leah and Jasper...
Coming to their senses and ignoring the tension between their races Leah and Jasper discover love
9. Is there such a thing as a four/ten romantic fluff story?
Not that I've heard of
10. Suggest a title for a one/five Hurt/Comfort fic.
11. What kind of plot would you use if four wanted to seduce one?
that is not something I want to read or discuss...EVER
12. Does anyone on your friends list read number seven/nine slash?
not that I know of
1.Do not introduce self as roleplaying character in public.
2.Do not talk to fictional characters in public.
3.Do not answer fictional characters in public.
4.Do not talk to inanimate objects in public.
5.Do not go out in public.
6.Disregard above note.Perform numbers 1 to 4.
8.Don't die alone. Take many people with you.
9.Floor is slippery when wet.
10.Lake is slippery when dry.
11.Only talk to strangers you know.
12.Strangers you don't know are spies... Kill them all.
13.For legal purposes be sure to delete above note.
14.Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you.
15.Kill them for security purposes.
16.Crying does not solve anything. Try violent mood swings.
17.Make a scene whenever humanly possible.
18.The men in white coats are not your friends.
19.Ask them for a room with lots of sharp, pointy objects.
20.When that doesn't work, ask for a designer jacket.
21.Chicken soup, although good for colds, is not the best cure for drowning.
22.Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing.
23.Unlike fine wine, milk does not get better with age.
24.Always remember, um... um... Damn.
25.Train army of flying monkeys.
26.Goldfish don't like milk.
27.Do not maim people. If you already have, kill them to avoid lawsuits.
28.Find out who invented the word "pianist".
29.People are staring at you.
30.So act insane.
31.People are weird, but not as weird as me.
32.Do not taunt animals at zoo. They have feelings... And teeth.
33.Little people are aggressive. Stay away from little people.
34.Going through other people's stuff is a bonding experiance. Do this as much as possible.
35.You'll sometimes notice shadows late at night. Don't worry. It's only me... Bonding.
36.Never pet a burning dog.
37.Never make eye contact with a naked man. Especially if you are wearing a parka.
38.Naked men dig parkas.
39.Beware the naked man who offers you his parka.
40.You know what would look good on you?
42.Don't worry. It's only a harmless pimento bug.
43.The size of Danny DeVito.
44.Making an amusing facial expression. Like this.
45.Numbers are evil. Count in clovers.
46.Stalking is fun. Do it more.
47.Make a large sign saying, "Look at me, I'm a gumnut tree!"
48.No matter what anyone says, there is a way to get to your fantasy world.
49.That way is rum.
50.Constipated people don't give a sh-t.
52.You cannot kill the snow.
53.The snow can kill you.
54.Grass can also kill you.
55.The leprechaun on the cereal box said I can't get his lucky charms...
56.Catch and castrate leprechaun.
57.HE is real... No matter what the men in white coats say.
58.Staple paper in the middle of the page.
59.In case of blank looks, laugh maniacally.
60.You are not haxxor l337 or an uberhacker or anything like that.
61.Pretend to be so around teh n00bs.
62.Do not go out with voice #7. He is a sadistic, soul sucking demon.
63.Disregard last note. Go out with demon. Who needs a soul anyway?
64.Ask Senior Diablo for a bigger pitchfork.
65.Remember to kill HIM...
66.Tell the small children in Toys 'R' Us that the dolls have an insatiable thirst for blood.
67.Note reactions. Avoid parents.
68.The blood of infants gives unholy superpowers according to Jhonen C. Vasquez. Test theory.
69.Scream, the doctors don't like it, they'll give you a shot of something nice.
70.Hide the bodies, otherwise peole ask embarressing questions.
71.Eat the evidence.
72.But not if it's broken glass.
73.When in the presence of someone much wiser than you, point in a random direction and yell, "Look, a distraction!" Then run.
74.Do not tell children that Santa is fat because he eats kids.
75.Disregard last note.
77.On average, 100 people choke to death on ball point pens every year.
78.Stock up on ball point pens.
79.Learn to fly. Tell no one.
80.The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing.
81.Do not stick fingers into blender.
82.Blender... Bad... Ouch.
83.Blood loss is bad.
84.Find way to re-attatch fingers.
85.Scream as much as humanly possible at 2AM.
86.Answer every question with a question.
87.Ask people what gender they are.
89.Refer to people as "mortal".
90.The Seagull From Hell is out to get me.
91.Kill all enemies in most disturbing way possible.
92.Start by drowning them in fire ants.
93.Find the creators of pop-up messages.
96.Teachers don't like finding notes on world domination.
97.Dunk head in boiling water.
98.Disregard last note. Was written by Voice #7.
99.Gullible IS written on the ceiling!
100.Investigate this whole "critical mass" thing when the klaxon dies down...
1) Repost this message IF YOU HATE DRUNK DRIVING!!. 2) Ignore it as if it never touched you. have a heart
A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love