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Joined 11-26-07, id: 1430262, Profile Updated: 03-27-08
Author has written 2 stories for Harry Potter, and Princess Diaries.

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which means that weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

A Few Random Facts You May Or May Not Have Wanted to Know About Me

Name: Guess.

Age: 214. Yes, I'm older then you. Get over it.

Things I Love:

The Harry Potter books

LilyJames fanfiction


The Marauders (except Wormtail the Beeep)


Things I Hate:

People who think they're always right

People who tell me I'm wrong

People who tell me I'm a dirty hypocrite (I already knew that. Thanks.)


Cleaning my room (but then again, who doesn't?)

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile.

Don't think of yourself as an ugly person. Think of yourself as a beautiful monkey!

If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy this to your profile.

Silence is golden...But Shouting is FUN!

If you're Defying Gravity, and no one can pull you down, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

92 percent American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their butts off .

I, Weird and Happy, solemly swear that I would rather eat a pile of toasted, smelly socks owned by the hobo around the corner than go my life without a series based on The Marauders. Therefore, I, Weird and Happy, declare that if JKR ever wanted to write the series, I would back her up with all my will.


0. Skip random numbers when numbering something, and always start with 0.

1. Avoid using punctuation

3. Have your co-workers address you as you wrestling name, Rock Bottom.

4. When someone invites you to a party, tell them a week in advance that you can't attend because "you're not in the mood".

5. When you go through a drive through, specify that your order is "to go".

6. When you go out to eat, order a diet water with a serious face.

7. At a store, set all clock radios to a polka station, turn the volume all the way up, then set them to go off all at the same time.

9. Decorate your office with mosquito netting and toucans and seashells and play tropical music all day.

10. At the zoo, exit while screaming, "They're loose, run for your lives!"

11. Run around with a lamp shade on your head yelling, "the sun!! it's dying!!"...

12. Switch the light button on and off for a while. then say, "ooh... I get it!!"...

13. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training"

15. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment

16. Change channels five minutes before the end of every show

18. Light road flares on a birthday cake.

19. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.

20. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks

21. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling as they read.

22. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

23. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day

24. Change your name to "John Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."

25. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

26. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

27. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

29. Make appointments for the 31st of September.

30. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."

31. Honk and wave to strangers.

32. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.

33. Tell people their accent isn't fooling anyone.

35. Learn Morse code and have conversations with friends in public consisting of "Beeeep bip bip beeeep bip.."

36. Leave your Nine Inch Nails tape in Great Uncle Ed's stereo, with the volume properly adjusted.

37. Pay for your dinner with pennies

38. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

39. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador."

40. Drive half a block

41. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains, such as "Feliz Navidad," the Archies' "Sugar," or the Mr. Rogers theme song.

42. Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."

44. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, pronouncing the results

45. Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice.

46. As people talk, smell their shoulders.

48. Call into work and tell them you have something better to do today.

49. Sample every flavor of ice cream and tell the clerk what you don't like about each one.

50. Learn "Ice Ice Baby" by heart and recite it endlessly

51. Phone McDonald's and try to make a reservation for that evening.

52. Phone random numbers and tell them you are holding their daughter hostage.

53. Pretend you have gone completely deaf.

54. Walk into people's houses, go straight to the fridge without saying hello, and help yourself to their food.

56. Play the electric guitar very loudly and badly, then when the neighbors ask you to turn it down, play even louder. When they come round to complain again, say, "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you asked me to turn it up."

57. Try to fit the word "cornucopia" into every sentence you say.

58. Secretly learn to play the piano, then go to a friend's house who has a piano. Claim you've never played before then play Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring perfectly the first time. Then say, "I guess I must kinda be a natural."

59. Bark like a dog whenever anyone says the word "the."

60. Ride a unicycle to work.

61. Stare at people for about five minutes, making sure they know you're staring at them. Then, slowly sneak up to them while humming the Mission: Impossible theme. Sniff their head, then run away. Repeat.

63. Walk up to someone eating. Lean over and stare at them intently until they notice. Continue to do so until they ask what you're doing. Reply, "I've been watching you eat for the last 30 seconds. You're weird!" Leave the restaurant.

65. Go to a gum ball machine insert coins until you have a matching pair of fake eyeballs. After attaining these, record the theme song of The Twilight Zone over and over again. Drive down the street wearing the eyeballs and playing The Twilight Zone theme very loud. When you get pulled over, leap into the passenger's seat and claim, "He was here a minute ago, officer!"

67. After visiting the local donut shop, sit on the floor cross-legged and insist in a childish voice that you haven't received enough chocolate sprinkles.

68. Spread fertilizer on half your neighbor's lawn.

69. Wash and scrub the trees in your front lawn.

70. Throw newspapers back at paperboys

If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and

lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit

a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod

as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile!

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English" .

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20 shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as
replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl!

If you have a really long profile, copy and paste this to your profile to make it even longer.

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Commentarius by B.C Daily reviews
Lily has always considered herself ordinary. But as she enters her 7th year, things start changing and Lily starts going a bit mad. Suddenly, she's Head Girl, her mates are acting strangely, and there's a new James Potter she can't seem to get rid of. PRE-HBP
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 32 - Words: 739,666 - Reviews: 3270 - Favs: 4,534 - Follows: 4,032 - Updated: 8/20/2013 - Published: 1/3/2007 - James P., Lily Evans P.
The Attic by Kaitipoola reviews
A modern-day Romeo and Juliet story, set in Seattle. Assassins, forsooth.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 60,920 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 7/24/2010 - Published: 1/1/2009
Penmanship Smitten by HeyLookTheSnitch reviews
There were four things that I was incredibly certain of— 1. Prongs was a troublemaker. 2. He very well could be lying and really was a female. 3. I had no clue who he was. 4. I one hundred percent fancied the pants off the bloke.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 97,919 - Reviews: 973 - Favs: 957 - Follows: 416 - Updated: 1/4/2010 - Published: 6/17/2008 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
The Devil Wears Quidditch Gear by HeyLookTheSnitch reviews
Darn those bloody Quidditch robes. For all Lily Evans cared, Quidditch could be chucked into the next century. In fact, the stupid sport should just be outlawed all together. Come to think of it, so should the game of Truth or Dare. LJ 7th year.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 105,890 - Reviews: 1049 - Favs: 1,153 - Follows: 458 - Updated: 3/24/2008 - Published: 1/4/2007 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
Haggis from Algernon by Rude Gus reviews
The fic about nothing. Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 93,200 - Reviews: 295 - Favs: 561 - Follows: 117 - Updated: 1/16/2008 - Published: 7/28/2007 - Lily Evans P., James P. - Complete
Mothers by Winterlude reviews
A series of oneshots focused on mothers in HP. Among them there are Molly, Lily, Dora, Mrs. Creevey, Mrs. Diggory, Mrs. Granger, Ginny and others. COMPLETE! Translated into French and Spanish. Go check the translations among my favourite stories!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 12 - Words: 16,177 - Reviews: 376 - Favs: 201 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 11/18/2007 - Published: 10/28/2007 - Complete
Conversation in C Minor by Rude Gus reviews
I’m so clever, said James Potter, letting out an elitist laugh. No one else would ever have thought of this ingenious plan. He rocked his chair back onto two legs, and almost fell, but didn’t.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,054 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 247 - Follows: 19 - Published: 1/23/2007 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
Bloody McLaggen by Elizabeth90 reviews
This is a missing moment of HBP. What really happened when Ginny visited Harry at the hospital wing after his Quidditch injury? Ginny and Harry's musings on their hidden feelings for each other.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 11,166 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 6/5/2006 - Published: 5/11/2006 - Ginny W., Harry P. - Complete
Soundly Asleep by Elizabeth90 reviews
Harry has wanted to tell Ginny how he feels for a long time. He doesn't have the courage to do it when she's awake, but one night when he finds her asleep he begins to talk. HG Fluff - Complete!
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,877 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 155 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 9/8/2004 - Published: 9/5/2004 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Tall Drink of Water reviews
A song which M. Moscovitz wrote to M. Mignonette Grimaldi Thermopolis Renaldo. Or maybe he didn't actualy write it. Or maybe... he did?
Princess Diaries - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 256 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 3 - Published: 5/13/2008 - Complete
The Crazed Story Monster reviews
Warning: This story has no plot whatsever, includes a Character-bashing, and laughs endlessly about James Pothead's brain captivity. In other words, you definitely shouldn't read this. But you will anyway. Right?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,243 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Updated: 11/30/2007 - Published: 11/29/2007 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete