hide bio
Poll: Should the Commentator remain to be featured in 'Philosopher's Stone with a Difference' as well as his assistants? Vote Now!
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 11-29-07, id: 1432963, Profile Updated: 01-05-13
Author has written 41 stories for Harry Potter, Star Wars, Bleach, Fullmetal Alchemist, Naruto, Yu Yu Hakusho, Heroes, Doctor Who, Pokémon, Spider-Man, Lost, Hunger Games, Frozen, Divergent Trilogy, Disney, Family Guy, and Once Upon a Time.

Hey everyone,

just wanted you to all know that I have set up my own twitter account. So to keep up with all the recent fanfiction writing activity, check out my account at!/Anonymius1

Commentator: Well. This has been a rather disappointing Christmas.

Professor: How so, Sir?

Commentator: With Anonymius promising to publish a new chapter or story every day from Christmas Day, and instead not only posting them on different days, but only getting up to eight!

Professor: Personally I don't think it's been too bad, Sir.

Commentator: -You don't?

Professor: Not at all, Sir. Personally, I was surprised that he managed to get one up, let alone eight!

Commentator: - Your confidence in our creator is very reassuring, Prof.

Professor: Thank you, Sir.

Commentator: But what about all those people he promised?

Sammy: Cheer up, Boss! Most people probably didn't even see his message on his profile!

Commentator: -Thank you Sam, that has definitely cheered me up!

Sammy: You're welcome, Boss!

Professor: Still, though, he could get it up to nine today!

Commentator: Hmm. You're right! That's not so bad at all! I declare this glass of milk to be three quarters full! Which is one quarter less to my liking!

Professor: Of course Anonymius is still bound to get up to twelve soon!

Commentator: Yes, but it will be passed Twelfth Night by now, won't it? We can't keep pretending that we're still within the twelve days after twelfth night!

Professor: Fair point. But there is still one way we can continue the whole 'Each day of christmas we get something that's themed to that day in the 'Twelve Days of Christmas' song!

Commentator: ...How?

Anonymius presents:

The Twelve Days - I mean, um- The four remaining days of Christmas!

On the Ninth day of Christmas my true love sent to meeeeeeeeeeeee-

Ballet Instructor: And a one, and a two, and a three, and a four-

(Her and eight other dancers are practicing Ballet)

Commentator: Okay when did my hall double as a place to practice Ballet?

On the tenth day of Christmas my true love sent to meeeeeeeeeeee-


Commentator: Now who could that be?

(Goes to open the door. In come ten Michael Flatley look-a-likes Irish dancing. They leap over the Commentators, before leaping over them again and exiting)

Commentator: Hehe. Ten lords were leaping.

On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love sent to meeeeeeeeeee-

(Eleven pipers are playing their pipes)

Commentator: This is actually quite soothing.

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love sent to meeeeeeeeeee-

Commentator: ALL RIGHT THAT'S IT! I WANT ANSWERS! WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL THIS? Who keeps sending us birds and milk maids and dancers and pipers and the like? WHO? WHO I ASK YOU, WHO?

Sammy: Doctor Who?

(The Commentator kicks him)

Commentator: Not in the mood, Sammy!


Commentator: Fine! Let's get this over with!

(As he goes for the door, twelve drummers drum their drums)

Healer: Merry Christmas, Bro.

Commentator: DARREN!

Healer: Yeah. I thought that while you were celebrating your Christmas I send you a gift for each day.

Commentator: So you're the one responsible for sending us all of this? And adding scenery to my fortress?

Healer: Yeah. Heh heh. Ain't I a stinker?

Commentator: Yes. Yes you are. (Puts his arm around the Healer's shoulders) But I wouldn't have you any other way!

Healer: Wow. I didn't know you cared, bro.

Commentator: Well just for the Christmas season. Tomorrow I'll go back to hating your guts.

Healer: That's fine by me. By the way, the calling birds wanted to let me know that they thought you were a little rude the way you shouted at them when they were only wishing you merry Christmas.

Commentator: -Is that what they were saying? Forgive me, I don't speak squabblehawk outside of my canary form.

Healer: Fair enough. I'll let them know that.

Commentator: As for the rest of you-

(All the Anonymius characters gather)

Anonymius characters: We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, and a happy new year! Good tidings-

Professor: (Sir, isn't this song out of place now?)

Commentator: (What, it's still technically Christmas!)

Professor: (I know but the whole 'new year' thing!)

Commentator: (Just go with it, Prof!)

Anonymius Characters: We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, and a happy new year!


Happy Twelfth Night, everyone! So sorry I couldn't keep my promise! But at least I did better than Naruto the Abridged movie, or even screwattack with Goku vs Superman!

Of course I can respect those guys wanting their vid to be as great as possible and why it will take longer! I myself wanted to post a good chapter tonight, but I think I may need more time.

I will publish four new things as soon as I can! I am a man of my word!

Commentator: This coming from the guy who said he would post something new each day for twelve days of Christmas?

- Okay I am a man of my semi-word!

And still feel free to check out the Commentator's blog at

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Inside the anime by Kurisuta1 reviews
Our favorite characters explore their time inside the anime with a little inside help. Its a comedy people. mangaverse/anime
Fruits Basket - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,308 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/25/2008
Ginny Weasley and the Deathly Hallows by twilighthp95 reviews
Ginny's starting her 6th year at Hogwarts. Exciting, right? Normally, yes. But this year, it is the last place she wants to be. Her brother, best friend, and exboyfriend are all risking their lives, but no, it's too dangerous for Ginny! What will she do?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 53 - Words: 77,254 - Reviews: 153 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 4/24/2008 - Published: 11/18/2007 - Ginny W., Luna L. - Complete
From the Ashes by memories of pain reviews
Harry and Ginny story. After part four. Harry dies in order to save Cedric. But when the whole wizarding world suffers from the fight against Voldemort, school goes on. And who will turn up?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 17 - Words: 29,492 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 3/12/2008 - Published: 10/23/2007 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
Our Family Tree? by Da Phoenix 13 reviews
The Weasley clan reacts to the crappy family tree J.K. Rowling recently pulled out of thin air. The link's inside for anyone who hasn't seen it yet. I don't know about the rest of you, but it left me enraged... this is me ranting.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,779 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 7 - Published: 12/30/2007 - Harry P., George W. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The War of the Five Cities reviews
It's been a year since the events of 'Allegiant'. Tobias is still grieving over what happened to Tris. While trying to get on with his life, a former member of the Bureau of Genetic Welfare approaches him, asking for assistance in stopping an ongoing war in the last active experiment of the bureau, where the equivalents of the factions each have their own city.
Divergent Trilogy - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 60,590 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 10/1 - Published: 8/14/2016
Follow a number of students across the factions as they make the choices that will define them for the rest of their lives, and the consequence of that choice as they go through initiation, whether it be for Abnegation, Amity, Candor, Dauntless, or Erudite.
Divergent Trilogy - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,652 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/11 - Published: 5/14/2016
How Once Upon A Time Should Have Ended reviews
Parody of Once Upon A Time in the style of the HISHE videos. There must have been an easier way for Rumplestiltskin to get to the Land Without Magic without resorting to the convoluted means the whole series relied on? Oh wait! There was! Actually several emerged over the course of the series, but there was one in particular that I could think of from Season 1.
Once Upon a Time - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 841 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/3
Did you ever see?
Did you ever see the movie 'Contact? Cos I didn't. But I'm sure there are PLENTY of other examples that would get the same reaction from Stewie as Annie Wilkes in that Misery bit with Brian as Paul.
Family Guy - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 264 - Published: 4/17
Divergent Abridged (With Commentary)
The film abridged, parodied, and commentated on by an inter-franchise entity, his professor assistant and a giant talking slug.
Divergent Trilogy - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,657 - Published: 4/15
Divergent Disney XD
In a world divided into factions where you must choose where you belong, familiar looking characters from different backgrounds must make their choice and get through initiation in the midst of a conspiracy that threatens everything they know. Featuring characters from series including 'Phineas And Ferb', 'Gravity Falls', 'Wander Over Yonder' and 'Star Vs The Forces Of Evil'.
Crossover - Disney & Divergent Trilogy - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,486 - Published: 3/26
Doctor Who Abridged reviews
Doctor Who abridged and parodied.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 12 - Words: 34,696 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 4/18/2016 - Published: 5/22/2009 - 9th Doctor, Rose T.
Frozen: What Could Have Happened reviews
What if Anna had never gone after Elsa? What if she was never found by Hans and his volunteers? Then we might have gotten a very different (and yet familiar) story.
Frozen - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 22 - Words: 89,924 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 1/12/2016 - Published: 10/4/2015
FMA Abridged With Commentary: Season 3 reviews
The third in the 'Fullmetal Alchemist Abridged With Commentary ' series.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,357 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 1/5/2016 - Published: 1/11/2009 - Edward E., Alphonse E.
Force Awakens: The Reaction reviews
While everyone seems excited for the new Star Wars film, there's an inter-dimensional entity who's actually dreading this film coming out!
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,319 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 12/22/2015 - Published: 12/16/2015
The Hunger Games: You Win Or You Die reviews
Having been caught in 'The Hunger Games' craze, I've decided to write my own story about a Hunger Games of an unspecified date. Who will win and who will die? Read and find out. By the way excuse me 'Game of Thrones' fans for using that famous line but I found it illustrates the Hunger Games perfectly. Also there's another reason for me using it to be discovered later on.
Hunger Games - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,230 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 8/9/2015 - Published: 5/4/2013
Heroes Abridged: With Commentary, Season Three reviews
The third season of 'Heroes' shortened, mocked, and commented on.
Heroes - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 17,116 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/24/2013 - Published: 8/1/2010 - Peter P., Hiro N.
Goblet of Fire: A Different Kind Of Dark Lord reviews
Sequel to 'Chamber of Secrets: A Different Conclusion' and the third in the Tebadam Nargoa series. During his fourth year, Harry will come face to face with the dark wizard who tried to kill him thirteen years ago.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Horror/Suspense - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,474 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 1/5/2013 - Published: 8/1/2010 - Harry P.
Harry Potter and the Blood Traitor reviews
Sequel to 'Philosopher's Stone With A Difference'. Harry Potter returns to Hogwarts this year, but he's not the only one. An infamous serial killer known as the Blood Traitor is back, declaring war on all the Slytherin students.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 7 - Words: 20,926 - Reviews: 1 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/2/2013 - Published: 6/26/2009 - Harry P., Ron W.
Amazing SpiderMan: The reaction reviews
While Sammy The Slug is excited about the upcoming Spider-Man movie, the Commentator however is alot more pessimistic...
Spider-Man - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,315 - Reviews: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/8/2012 - Published: 7/2/2012
The Amazing SpiderMan' Trailer Abridged reviews
A parody of the second trailer of 'The Amazing Spider-Man'.
Spider-Man - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 738 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/2/2012 - Peter P./Spider-Man, J.J. Jameson
Pokemon The Movie: The Shadow Of The Dictator reviews
When inter-dimensional entity the Commentator is feeling bored, he decides to relive his greatest adventure.
Pokémon - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 14,366 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 4/1/2011 - Published: 4/28/2010 - Ash K./Satoshi, Jimmy/Kenta
Star Wars: The ReImagining reviews
If someone was to re-imagine 'Star Wars', it would probably look something like this...
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,735 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/8/2011 - Luke S., Han S. - Complete
Harry Potter Abridged, With Commentary reviews
All seven Harry Potter installments to be shortened and incidentally to be humoured as well. What is meant by 'Commentary' Read and find out.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 10 - Words: 63,990 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 1/6/2011 - Published: 8/22/2008 - Harry P., Ron W.
Spiderman: The TV Series reviews
When the Commentator decides to create a clone of 'Smallville', sap it of everything about Superman from it, replacing the essence with Spider-Man instead, this is what he gets.
Spider-Man - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,528 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/6/2011 - Peter P./Spider-Man, Gwen S.
The Second SpiderMan reviews
Watch as the First Spider-Man regenerates into the Second Spider-Man in preparation for his new movie!
Spider-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,562 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 7/19/2010 - Peter P./Spider-Man, Mary Jane W. - Complete
Lost: The Reaction reviews
The Commentating Trio watch the final episode of 'Lost'.
Lost - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,285 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/17/2010 - Jack, Christian S. - Complete
Spiderman Abridged With Commentary reviews
Spiderman movies shortened, parodied and commentated on.
Spider-Man - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 9,385 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 4/30/2010 - Published: 3/19/2010 - Peter P./Spider-Man, Mary Jane W.
Spiderman The TV Series: Trailer reviews
Teaser for an upcoming fanfic, based on an idea of removing everything Superman from Smallville, retaining the original framework, but having it being about Spiderman instead. Trailer based on Watchmen trailer. Enjoy.
Spider-Man - Rated: K - English - Drama/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 364 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 4/3/2010 - Peter P./Spider-Man, Gwen S. - Complete
Heroes Abridged: With Commentary, Generations reviews
Sequel to Heroes Abridged: With Commentary, Genesis. Season Two of 'Heroes' abridged and parodied, with commentary by the Commentator, Professor and Sammy the Slug.
Heroes - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,941 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 2/27/2010 - Published: 1/24/2010 - Peter P., Hiro N. - Complete
Pokemon: The Movie Trailer reviews
Teaser for a Pokemon story I came up with years ago, and only now have been able to start uploading it on this website.
Pokémon - Rated: K - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 144 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 2/22/2010 - Complete
Yu Yu Hakusho Abridged: With Commentary reviews
Yu Yu Hakusho shortened and humoured, featuring a few inter-franchise beings making comments when appropriate.
Yu Yu Hakusho - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 23,690 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 11/29/2009 - Published: 2/13/2009 - Yusuke U., Botan - Complete
Heroes Abridged: With Commentary, Genesis reviews
When inter-franchise being the Commentator is told by his assistant the Professor about Heroes, at first he is cynical, believing every Sci-fi-fan series being fated to become really mediocre. Then he realises that it's worth checking out!
Heroes - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 28,690 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 11/18/2009 - Published: 2/13/2009 - Peter P., Hiro N. - Complete
Naruto Abridged With Commentary: Chuunin Exams reviews
The Chuunin Exams' arc As well as the succeeding 'Invasion of Konoha' arc shortened and parodied.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 25,304 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 10/30/2009 - Published: 2/25/2009 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Chamber of Secrets: A Different Conclusion
Sequel to 'Philosopher's Stone: A Different Beginning'. Harry and his friends set out to stop the heir of Slytherin from harming muggleborns. But in an unknown chamber he's going to discover that there's a threat worse than Slytherin's monster!
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 13,077 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 10/29/2009 - Published: 3/5/2009 - Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
Philosopher's Stone with a difference reviews
Same basic plot except a slight alteration concerning one of the characters. And alot of changes extending from that one. What has been changed? Read and find out.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 11 - Words: 36,420 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 3/21/2009 - Published: 1/9/2008 - Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
To Kill a Potter: Philosopher's Stone
AU story in which Voldemort and other characters particularly villains are replaced with new characters, Harry has a brother, and there are dark forces at work that seek to destroy Harry and assure the Dark Lord's supremacy.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,315 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/14/2009 - Harry P., Ron W.
The Potter, the Potions Master, and the Stone reviews
Harry Potter is a boy who discovered that he is a wizard. Eric Eago is the Potions Master at Hogwarts. The Philosopher’s Stone is an object that can create gold and give immortality. This year, the destinies of these three things shall intertwine.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Mystery/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,219 - Reviews: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/11/2009 - Published: 2/3/2009 - Harry P., Albus D.
Cartoon Wars: Episode 1, the avian menace reviews
A Star Wars parody. Gennai Samurai Qui-Gon Genies and his apprentice Obi-Futatsu Kenobies must protect a main character from the Federation of Plankton and come across a mysterious boy from Reboot, whom Genies believe is the subject of an ancient spoiler
Star Wars - Rated: T - English - Parody/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,757 - Reviews: 5 - Updated: 2/10/2009 - Published: 1/13/2008 - Qui-Gon J., Obi-Wan K.
Philosopher's Stone: A different beginning reviews
AU story, with Voldemort replaced and Dumbledore and Hagrid marginalised with brand new characters. Mad, am I? Nothing could be better than Voldemort, Dumbledore and Hagrid, you say? You're probably right, but let's see what you make of it anyway.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 9,893 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/22/2009 - Published: 1/27/2008 - Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
Naruto Abridged With Commentary: Zabuza Saga reviews
First season of Naruto shortened, humoured and mocked all the way through!
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 18,293 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 1/17/2009 - Published: 11/9/2008 - Naruto U., Sakura H. - Complete
FMA Abridged With Commentary: Season 2 reviews
Sequel to FMA Abridged With Commentary : Season 1.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,811 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 1/1/2009 - Published: 12/4/2008 - Edward E., Alphonse E. - Complete
FMA Abridged With Commentary: Season 1 reviews
All At least most of the first season of 'Full Metal Alchemist' abridged and shortened. Introduced, concluded and commented through by an overseeing being and his assistants.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 13,034 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 11/21/2008 - Published: 10/22/2008 - Edward E., Alphonse E. - Complete
Filler reviews
A little songfic tribute to all filler material out there.
Bleach - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 459 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/19/2008 - Complete
I will survive' reviews
AKA a musical monologue from Snape’s point of view of the 'Order of the Phoenix' chapter ‘Snape’s worst memory.'
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 538 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 6 - Published: 12/9/2007 - Severus S., Harry P. - Complete
My hate will go on By Severus Snape reviews
This song was composed and sung by everyone's favourite and least favourite Potions master, after learning that in Deathly Hallows he'd never get the chance to torment Harry ever again.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 241 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/6/2007 - Severus S., Harry P.
Witch08 (11)