hide bio
Poll: NCIS or CSI? Pick your favorite...yeah, I'm that bored. Vote Now!
PM . Follow . Favorite
beta: β Beta Profile
Joined 12-20-07, id: 1449320, Profile Updated: 06-20-08
Author has written 17 stories for NCIS, and Final Fantasy XII.

About me

First of all, yes. I know I spelled "caffeine" wrong on my username, get over it and stop PMing me!! I could change it, but I won't.

Age: None of your business! Never ask a girl that, unless you want slapped; if you guess, guess low!

Hobbies: FanFiction, reading, shopping of craigslist (don't you love that site?), and watching brainless movies

If you ever need advice, someone to pray for you, or just someone to vent to, I will always listen (or read)! You may be half a world away, I probably have never met you, but I'll be there for you if you need someone! ;)

Anyone need proof of Global Warming?

A little personal pick-me up for anyone who stresses over their weight For all those people out there, other teenage girls especially, don't let anyone tell you how you should look. Be happy with the way you are, okay? If you're fat, be the best fat person you can be! If you're skinny, be the best skinny person you can be!

For years, I was the fat kid. Picked last for sports, cut first in dance. I couldn't shop for clothes with my friends, because we weren't even close to the same size. Then I got really sick, and went from 130 down to 99lbs, and people accused me of being anorexic. Trust me, you can't please people. Its not even worth trying, so don't stress over it. Find whats healthy for you, and as long as you're happy and healthy, that's all that matters, okay? My dad would always tell me "illegitimi non carborundum"; meaning "don't let the bastards get you down." ;)

If any of you are those f@#ing aholes who've ever made fun of someone for their weight, or who thinks fat is ugly, take a look at this, and I dare you to tell me this is how a human being should look!

Also, find out the truth about weight and your health!

Favorite Quotes

"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."

"Whenever a man does a profoundly stupid thing, it is always from the noblest intentions."

"The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is at all comprehensible." -Albert Eintein

"See, the problem is that God gave men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."-Robin Williams

"When it is dark enough, you can see the stars." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"History repeats itself because no one was listening the first time." -Anonymous

"All generalizations are dangerous, even this one." -Alexandre Dumas

Favorite Proverbs

You always learn something even if you don’t know it.- Jewish proverb

Baka wa shinanakya naoranai. There is no cure/medicine for an idiot.- Japanese proverb

Wanting is more pleasurable than having - Vulcan proverb

Zevel ze zevel. Crap is crap.-Hebrew saying

Favorite TV Shows

NCIS, Mythbusters, Big Bang Theory, Penn and Teller: Bulls...

Favorite Movies

Four Rooms (poor Ted), Sweeney Todd: Demon Barber of Fleet Street, Pulp Fiction

You know you live in 2007 when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did

Nerds like comics and card games. Geeks like trig and reading. If you are one or both, copy this and paste it into your profile

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile. If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile! If you have ever run into a wall, copy this on your profile! If you've ever fallen UP stairs, copy this on your profile! If you've ever forgotten to know what to do.

If you've ever copied and pasted from someone's profile, copy this into your profile

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing maniacally, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever stayed up for over 40 hours continuously just because you stinkin' COULD, copy this into your profile.

If you believe that preps travel in packs then place this on your profile.

If you have sibling(s) that drive you crazy then copy this onto your profile.

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Silent Night by Trivette Lover Heather reviews
Individual Series of Tags To The Season Six Episode, Silent Night.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 5,130 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 1/3/2009 - Published: 12/16/2008 - Leroy Jethro Gibbs, Abby S. - Complete
My Name by M E Wofford reviews
Very short rumination - TIVA.
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 357 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/15/2008 - Ziva D., Tony D. - Complete
Here for the Party by M E Wofford reviews
What might happen when Ziva loses control.
NCIS - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,551 - Reviews: 133 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 12/1/2008 - Published: 11/29/2008 - Ziva D., Tony D. - Complete
Tornado by vamp926 reviews
There's a tornado on the way, who will save the day?
NCIS - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 655 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 12 - Published: 4/28/2008 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
What That Tells You by DrawMeASheep reviews
Ducky tends to an inebriated Ziva and learns something interesting in the process.
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,738 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/28/2007 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Out of Thin Air reviews
In pursuit of a drug dealer, a plane carrying the team crashes in the rainforest. Mayhem ensues! I own nothing, all hail DPB!
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 22 - Words: 33,265 - Reviews: 233 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 3/27/2010 - Published: 4/20/2008
Never take anything for granted reviews
Sequel to Accidents Happen: Gibbs' rule #8- never take anything for granted... Tiva. Angst, romance, family, even spirituality, a bit of everything. A bit depressing at first, but I promise it'll get better
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 21,116 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 3/27/2010 - Published: 5/20/2008 - Ziva D., Tony D.
untitled for now reviews
When an assassin tries to kill the soonto be queen, the city falls into chaos. If she dies, who will take her place? If she lives, will she be fit to rule? If you'd like to help me come up with a title, PM me!
Final Fantasy XII - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,563 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 1/31/2009 - Ashe
Home for the holidays reviews
After a tough case, the team gathers to celebrate the seasons. Yes, I know its May, Christmas is months away. If you need cheering up, read this! The team congregates at Gibbs' house to at least try to enjoy Christmas!
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 14,416 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 12/28/2008 - Published: 5/21/2008 - Complete
Bad dog, No biscuit! reviews
Is Abby's beloved Jethro the sweet little pup she's convinced he is? What is he really capable of? What has he done and why? Takes place between seasons 5 and 6. Minor character death, some McAbby, later Tiva if you squint. Minor spoilers for 'Dog Tags'
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 7 - Words: 10,261 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 11/15/2008 - Published: 6/14/2008
A Knight's Tale reviews
Basch, a young knight, is sent on a mission to find out what became of Ashe and her party when they go missing after an Archadian invasion. Mystery, drama, adventure, damsel in distress! BaschxAshe. AUish, pre-game. Updates based on whim, school, reviews.
Final Fantasy XII - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,142 - Reviews: 10 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 11/15/2008 - Published: 8/24/2008 - Ashe, Basch
Cave Mode' reviews
An insight into the world of men, no offense if you are one. If you've ever had trouble understanding the opposite sex, this fic is for you! Based loosly off 'Men are from Mars Women are from Venus'.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,099 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/2/2008 - Ziva D., Leroy Jethro Gibbs - Complete
Shanah Tovah reviews
A late Rosh HaShanah fic. Mostly humor and a cultural lesson. 'It's like an apple and an onion had a baby...' Short, but sweet. Read and review?
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 889 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/8/2008 - Ziva D., Tony D. - Complete
Time for some campaignin' reviews
Title taken from a JibJab video,which I encourage you to watch! The team gathers for a tradition they practice every four years:watching the debates,get drunk, and exchange political insults. Makes more sense than the summary implies. Post 6x02
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,090 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/1/2008
Summer Love reviews
A series of one shots, all base on the theme "Summer Love". #5- Cabin Fever- McGee tries to share a childhood pastime with Ziva, but everything doesn't go as planned. McGiva. Story currently on hiatus.
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,772 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 9/26/2008 - Published: 7/4/2008
Silence is golden, ignorance is bliss reviews
Some lessons come easier than others. Vaan learns a thing or two about women, and Balthier learns there are times when its best to just shut up and let things be. A short funny fic about growing up, maturing yes, there's a difference and wisdom
Final Fantasy XII - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,508 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 7 - Published: 8/21/2008 - Complete
Lessons Learned reviews
Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it. Jibbsish I suppose, but more harassment than romance. The Director forces an aptitude test on the agents, and learns that not everyone knows their stuff. Complete for now, but may add to it
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,597 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/15/2008 - Complete
Painful memories reviews
When misery falls on the team, each of them reflects on the past, present, and future. Somewhat angsty. Multi-chapter mini epic.
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 26,537 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 8/9/2008 - Published: 2/10/2008 - Ziva D.
Sexual healing reviews
You asked for it...missing sex scene from fic "Semper Fi?". Tiva love, that's about it. My first attempt at something like this, so please don't make fun of me.
NCIS - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,322 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/21/2008 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
Semper Fi? reviews
Gibbs' loyalties are put to the test when he's torn between his beloved team and a man with whom he served in the USMC. Always faithful? I own nothing, all hail DPB! Adult themes. Tiva
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Drama/Crime - Chapters: 23 - Words: 36,911 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 7/7/2008 - Published: 5/8/2008 - Leroy Jethro Gibbs - Complete
Accidents Happen reviews
Can the team solve a crime against one of their own? Can they do it with two agents in the hospital and a maniac after them? Tiva
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 26,740 - Reviews: 223 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 5/10/2008 - Published: 12/22/2007 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
Misconceptions: begining of a beautiful friendship reviews
An alternate ending to the season 3 episode, Silver War. Angst, friendship, Tiva if you squint, and drama galore!
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,316 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 5 - Published: 4/25/2008 - Ziva D., Ducky M. - Complete
Staff of:
  1. Let the Angells Burn...
    TV Shows CSI: New York