Author has written 21 stories for Discworld, Lord of the Rings, Star Trek: 2009, and Good Omens.
Greetings, O hapless Visitor, and beware the Grue!
Since I've Officially Posted Two Pence, I feel justified in writing an actual profile. It's very informative.
Order of Business #1:
Seven Haikus: Or, An Ode To The Art Of The Disclaimer
It has come to my
Attention that my fanfics
Are all undisclaimed.
Yet I am lazy;
Too lazy to fix each one
Hence the haikus I
Now present to you, reader.
Facts are as follows.
Discworld, alas, ain't
Mine. You can tell because I
Do not have a beard.
If I was bearded,
It might have been. But I don't.
This is my sorrow.
All that belongs to
Me are a few flat OCs
And some of the words.
One final note, dear
Reader. If you really thought
This mine - you are dense.
Order of Business #2:
Statistics, except not really, since there are very few numbers involved.
My name is not, alas, Schlodenbert Roxeim III. It kills me, but sometimes people just have to own up.
I did not just burn down the White House.
I completely failed to gain possession of weapons of mass destruction.
I own not even one single cherry tree.
I can't speak German.
I am not out of high school yet.
I do not have red hair.
I never ate a butterfly.
While these are just a few selected facts out of the many, I hope they will help you form a clear picture of various persons I ain't.
Order of Business #3:
Credits for the avatar to Marionette, x672, Emily, Debbie, Talia, Claire, or whatever it is she's calling herself today. I appreciate the most accurate rendition of my brain yet very, very much. Without it, who knows how far into the depths of iniquity I would have sunk?
Also, you can find the exact same fanfiction as is list below at the Archives of Excellence, because I am, obvs., excellent even in the my current dormant state. OBVS.