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Joined 01-05-08, id: 1465581, Profile Updated: 07-17-10
Author has written 7 stories for Transformers/Beast Wars, Aliens/Predator, and Transformers.

Time to edit the bio a bit. What a drag.

My new motto is: Be reasonable and do it my way.
I lurk as mdnytryder on many fan sites. In case you were wondering, my name is a twisted version of the Allman Brothers song, ‘Midnight Rider’.

Sorry, but I am a very slow story updater. I know it is annoying as all-get-out, but that’s just the way it is. I do the best I can.

If you want to see what I envision Killer from ‘Planet Mudball’ looks like, go here:

I live in western New York State. My pack includes a Lab named Harley and two rescued cats - Ratchet and Bluestreak. I own a log home (please don’t call it a cabin – it pisses me off), a truck named Ace, and a Harley named Heartbreaker.

My official job title is Assistant Manager. I am part of an editorial staff for a medical journal. We proofread medical reports, journal entries, letters to the editor and book reviews. I am also in charge of the bookkeeping; I have a B.S. in Accounting. During the tax season, I work for H&R Block. This will be my 22nd year doing taxes.

I read constantly and almost always have a paperback in my purse. Although lately, I have been using my nook more and more. An e-book reader. What a great invention!

I must have over a thousand boxed books in my garage, barn, basement and scattered throughout the house. Some of them I’ve had since the 1970’s, I reread them over and over. Unfortunately, I would rather read crap books than non-fiction. Steven King wrote in one of his early novels, reading rots the mind. Well, my brain became rancid sometime around 1978.

Other interests include the Buffalo Sabres, photography, deer hunting, sci-fi, fantasy, motorcycles, old muscle cars (although right now I have a serious hard-on for a new yellow Camaro), Predators (those masks are sexy), and Transformers. In fact, I must admit I am dangerously obsessed with Transformers, both G1 and the movieverse. I hate the 1986 movie and prefer to ignore it entirely. Transformers is the only fandom I really follow closely. I don't have time for any others.
I finally made it to my first Botcon this year in Orlando. What a fun time, I wish I had known about this fandom a long time ago. I am older than your average Transformer fan. To give an example, if I were a banana, my skin would have brown spots. Hey, wait a minute – my skin does have brown spots! Oh yeah, those are freckles. That’s OK. Never mind then.

I admire everyone who has the imagination and talent to put their thoughts into words or pictures. I try to leave reviews, usually at the end of a story. I also enjoy reading writer’s bios, especially if they include quotes. And I will never nag you to update sooner – that would make me a hypocrite!

Here are some quotes that I particularly enjoy, for one reason or another.


"Starscream Philosophy
A philosophy in which a recipient keeps a particular resource (object, another person, etc.) around and at their disposal despite having a very good reason to rid themselves of that resource because the resource in question provides some sort of valuable fringe benefit for the recipient. The term has it's origins in the science-fiction epic ‘TransFormers’ in which Megatron, the evil leader of the Decepticons, keeps his cohort Starscream around despite the threat Starscream poses to Megatron's iron-fisted rule of his subjects because Starscream apparently does his job so well. The term can be used to apply to a number of different situations.

EXAMPLE 1: "Though he knew that the alcohol he was drinking to excess would eventually do him in, Starscream philosophy kept him from flushing it all down the nearest toilet."

EXAMPLE 2: "She could barely stand to be around him because he was an over-emotional idiot, but she kept living with him for the great sex and the financial security he provided. Starscream philosophy was clearly at work here."
Posted by Kirk Bradford Myers, 12/29/06”

WhenI use a word, it means just what I choose it to mean—neither more nor less.
Humpty Dumpty in Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll

Look, I can’t be any clearer than how crystal clear I am being.
Sam Witwicky in Transformers (2007)

Dear Confused Teen Girls: someone who sparkles and won't have sex with you isn't a vampire; it's a gay guy.
Jim Butcher on Twitter

Sit next to the boy you think is the cutest.
Karen Pomeroy in Donnie Darko

Your mouth says no but your beard says yes.
Mr. Crepsley to Madame Truska in The Vampires Apprentice – Circus de Freak

I want a biker who reads poetry, who drinks beer and who lowers the toilet seat, understands the perfection of 90 feet between the bases and appreciates the running game. He hates talk shoes, reality TV, loves and misses Johnny Carson. He likes to vacuum and change the sheets. A guy who sleeps in, jogs, and smokes. He likes a good bar fight. And he likes to kiss as much as he likes to make love.
Sara Pezzini to Lee Woo when asked what kind of boyfriend she would order in Witchblade, Lagrimas

Punctuality is for people with nothing better to do.
Harry Dresden in Small Favor by Jim Butcher

We’re gonna need a new plan.
Royce in Predators

A lady always makes a man want to be better than he is.
Truth in The Harlequin

Never bathe in hot oil and Bisquick.
Kowalski in Madagascar Penguins in: A Christmas Caper

There is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness.
Po in Kung Fu Panda

Your kids aren't that cute.
Alexa Woods in Alien vs. Predator

There’s no place for truth on the Internet.
Howard Wolowitz in Big Bang Theory, The Vegas Renormalization

Respect my authority!
Eric Cartman in South Park

I’m not even supposed to be here! I’m just ‘Crewman Number Six’. I’m expendable. I’m the guy in the episode who dies to prove how serious the situation is. I’ve gotta get outta here!
Guy Fleegman in Galaxy Quest

Oh crap.
Hellboy in Hellboy

Death by teacup. Why didn’t I think of that.
Jack/Kyra in Chronicles of Riddick

There is always time for another last minute.
Death in The Hogfather

Remember, with great power, comes great responsibility.
Uncle Ben Parker in Spiderman

Are you kidding? I’m William Shatner, I can score anything.
William Shatner in Fanboys

Oh yea. I’m surrounded by morons.
Alexis in Transformers Armada, Episode 24, Chase

You aren’t too bright. I like that in a man.
Matty Walker in Body Heat

They don’t call him Starscream for nothing.
Powerlinked Prime and Jetfire in Transformers Armada, Episode 26, Link Up

Active evil is better than passive good.
Hector Mobius in Witchblade, episode 1.01 Parallax

You want to feel my spatula!
Mr. Ghoshdashtidar in Run Fat Boy Run

Wow! That was tingly!
Ratchet in Transformers (2007)

It’s all about rhythm.
Glitch in Tin Man

Have you got your processor up your exhaust port?
Ratchet in Transformers: Animated, Nanosec

I love the smell of bananas in the morning.
Horton in Horton Hears a Who

Last time you zapped me someplace, I didn’t poop for a week!
Dean Winchester to Castiel in Supernatural, Free to be You and Me.

Remember, no matter where you go, there you are.
Buckaroo Banzai in The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension

Well, this sucks.
Kowalski the penguin in Madagascar

I never look back darling, it detracts from the now.
Edna In The Incredibles

If I have to explain, you wouldn’t understand.
Harley Davidson T-shirt

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Diego Diaries 4 by arctapus reviews
This is a continuation of Parts 1, 2 and 3. The site punishes me for making long stories so here we go. This continues part 3 of the hilarity that is RvI, P&OP and the rebuilding of their civilization since the Fall. This is in anticipation of retrieving Cybertron and offing Megatron once and for all. Welcome aboard. Bookmark or whatever because here we go...!
Transformers - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 610 - Words: 1,512,785 - Reviews: 1688 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 23h - Published: 4/19/2014 - [Ratchet, Ironhide] Optimus Prime, Jazz
Enemy Friendship by Thunderstarwarp reviews
Transformers Animated: After a strange set of circumstances, Starscream starts to actually question his methods/reasons and his outlook on the human race. More imperticular of the girl Sari. Starscream X Sari Friendship.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 30 - Words: 56,386 - Reviews: 173 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 97 - Updated: 8/26 - Published: 6/2/2008 - Starscream, Sari S.
Masks by L. Mouse reviews
After Egypt, the Autobots cannot remain a secret. Can they make a new home for themselves on Earth? Can they defend Earth from a new threat? Ensemble cast, with numerous mechs imported from G1. Note warnings.
Transformers - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 113 - Words: 913,629 - Reviews: 1496 - Favs: 560 - Follows: 453 - Updated: 3/6 - Published: 7/14/2009 - Bumblebee
Coming to Terms by Bibliotecaria.D reviews
The Decepticons decide to do their part to cement the fragile peace. Now the Autobots have to come to terms with culture clash, interfacing kinks, and rubber chickens. Jazz can only hope these things aren't somehow connected.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 30 - Words: 234,345 - Reviews: 193 - Favs: 136 - Follows: 161 - Updated: 2/23 - Published: 3/26/2012 - Jazz, Starscream
Cover Me by Black Dragon Queen reviews
SLASH! MPREG An injured Barricade goes to Sam with an odd request-a truce between himself and the Autobots. But with the other Autobots inbound what will happen to our favorite interceptor? - NC17 Version on LJ, AFFnet & AO3! '07 Movie verse ONLY. This was started before the sequential movies so this is not compatible to either RotF/DotM/AoE. 9/11-Found 1/2 my notes... eh-heh
Transformers - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 199 - Words: 864,552 - Reviews: 4724 - Favs: 1,311 - Follows: 1,126 - Updated: 9/10/2014 - Published: 3/3/2008 - Barricade, Bumblebee, Sam W.
Quietus by ShyLight reviews
G1: Something went wrong, Sideswipe realized. He just wasn't sure what, and nobody would tell him.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Family - Chapters: 8 - Words: 43,159 - Reviews: 195 - Favs: 212 - Follows: 257 - Updated: 4/7/2013 - Published: 2/22/2010 - Sideswipe, Sunstreaker
The Diego Diaries Part Two by arctapus reviews
This is the story of Ratchet and Ironhide's prank war which goes global and intergalactic. It is essentially a humorous/dramatic love story. This is the second part because the first part is giving me fits for uploading. How's that for a crappy summary?
Transformers - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Humor - Chapters: 623 - Words: 1,387,315 - Reviews: 2380 - Favs: 111 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 9/8/2012 - Published: 1/20/2011 - Ironhide, Ratchet
Semantics by The Starhorse reviews
Prowl says 'potato', and Sideswipe says 'potahto'. You may guess where this is going.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 25,967 - Reviews: 207 - Favs: 379 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 1/20/2012 - Published: 5/1/2007 - Sideswipe, Prowl - Complete
Deviant by Taipan Kiryu reviews
After making amends with his origins, Thundercracker is forced to deal with long hidden doubts that will lead him to question the Decepticon cause and look for his true identity. The biggest transformations happen inside. Sequel to my fic "Purple rain".
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 40 - Words: 144,550 - Reviews: 709 - Favs: 136 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 8/2/2011 - Published: 5/3/2009 - Thundercracker - Complete
Monkey by Nightwind reviews
Without him, I was nothing. Without me, he was a monster. Sideswipe and Sunstreaker, Nightwind style.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 16,752 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 8/12/2010 - Published: 6/5/2010 - Sideswipe - Complete
Partners by Demyrie reviews
TFA. Lockdown offered him selfish solace in exchange for his values. What if Prowl had said yes? A piecemeal look at Prowl and Lockdown's inter-galactic life in all its odd, sweet and dangerous moments. LockdownxProwl. 'What-If' sequel to 'Deadlocked'.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 70 - Words: 269,288 - Reviews: 712 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 116 - Updated: 3/16/2010 - Published: 8/26/2008 - Lockdown, Prowl
Paltereth the Seeker, Nevermore! by R. Herring reviews
A dark parody of The Raven, by Edgar Allan Poe. A tragedy of lost love and a spiraling descent into madness. Megatron/Starscream.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: M - English - Parody/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,104 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/7/2010 - Megatron, Starscream - Complete
Grease Monkeys by chaitea16 reviews
09 Movie verse with other continuity undertones - Mikaela’s love life hits the road block from hell while Ratchet is left fuming over having committed Wheeljack inspired malpractice. Mikaela/Ratchet with mocking of Sam/Bee; Nothing for, or against, slah
Transformers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 18,958 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 10/3/2009 - Published: 8/19/2009 - Mikaela B., Ratchet - Complete
Staying Alive: A HowTo by The Starhorse reviews
Rule Number One: Don't ever, ever, EVER stab your commanding officer in the back. Rule Number Two: On the off chance that you ignore Rule Number One, you better run like hell. Far, far away.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 17,699 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 506 - Follows: 40 - Published: 8/9/2009 - Sideswipe, Sunstreaker - Complete
Honour the Canon by FanfictionWriter83729 reviews
A Sue parody. 07Movie, not 09 compliant. From ‘verse to ‘verse, Bots change, Cons change, humans change, but one great evil remains constant. And now she is in Movieverse.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,068 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 6/30/2009 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Complete
My Madness, My Saving Sanity by NightElfCrawler reviews
Beaten, broken and humiliated, revenge is the one thing that kept Starscream going. But is revenge enough to live on? And when the only place to turn to is your enemies, how long an a lie be convincing? How long can a charade be maintained?
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 25 - Words: 91,428 - Reviews: 371 - Favs: 318 - Follows: 116 - Updated: 12/1/2008 - Published: 7/23/2008 - Starscream - Complete
all your hidden faces by Carmilla DeWinter reviews
It turns out that getting Starscream to move in with him was the easy part. Slash StarscreamxPrime and a direct continuation of 'two worlds apart, two together'.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 32,812 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 10/14/2008 - Published: 9/4/2008 - [Starscream, Optimus Prime] Jazz, Thundercracker - Complete
Small Problems by Ghost of the Dawn reviews
G1: Megatron has a ray gun that shrinks Autobots, leaving them two and a half feet tall and very far from home.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 8 - Words: 65,306 - Reviews: 347 - Favs: 568 - Follows: 168 - Updated: 7/17/2008 - Published: 10/14/2007 - Prowl, Grimlock - Complete
Beware the Fangirls by Kenya Starflight reviews
A teleportation accident lands Thundercracker and Skywarp in a weird alternate universe. Now Thundercracker must face the most terrifying creatures of all... fangirls.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,204 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 10 - Published: 5/16/2008 - Thundercracker, Skywarp - Complete
Could Be, Might Be, A Possibility by Macx reviews
moviefic, Imperfection Deviation 'verse. An accident puts Will Lennox in a situation he hadn't signed up for when he became commander of the human unit of the Autobot base. It changes his life forever.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,991 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 5/9/2008 - Published: 1/20/2008 - Captain Lennox, Ironhide - Complete
Twisted by OKami-hu reviews
BarricadeBumblebee. One death paves the road for two more... 'Cade and Bee both fall deeper into madness, hating each other with passion but that isn't the only emotion their sparks hold.
Transformers - Rated: M - English - Drama/Tragedy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 27,384 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 84 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 4/2/2008 - Published: 10/20/2007 - Barricade, Bumblebee - Complete
Shoo Fly, Don't Bother Me by plunger02 reviews
2007Movie:OneShot: Ironhide runs into a small problem dealing with a small organic being, will this event change his life forever? Read and find out! RELOADED
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,378 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/18/2008 - Complete
Behind The Mask by AutobotV reviews
Behind his Battlemask, Optimus Prime hides a terrible wound to remind him of the pain and suffering Megatron gave to him and the innocent lives lost. Based on mmmmmr's Beyond his Battlemask on deviantArt. Never Forget, never forgive.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,818 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 10 - Published: 2/9/2008 - Complete
Flames to Dust by Paleodex reviews
G1 Even Lamborghinis don't last forever.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,947 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 108 - Follows: 9 - Published: 2/6/2008 - Sideswipe, Sunstreaker - Complete
Rhapsody in Black and White by OKami-hu reviews
Megatron has been capturing civilian bots and Autobot soldiers to literally breed his own army of Decepticons... and when a certain musician becomes his latest captive, Soundwave is unusually intrigued to find out what all the fuss is about. SWJazz
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,752 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 12 - Published: 12/24/2007 - Jazz, Soundwave - Complete
Yummy by Crooked reviews
"You give a new word to torture," Starscream growled. "And what's that," Megatron whispered into his ear. Starscream arched his back as he panted, "Yummy." Smut. MegaxStar.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,501 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 12 - Published: 12/2/2007 - Complete
Beautiful Day by Aspirare reviews
Bee muses. Some minor BumblebeeSam. Fluff.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,085 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 178 - Follows: 10 - Published: 11/27/2007 - Complete
Armistice Day by Mystic-Nin reviews
Mikaela has a request, and Bumblebee learns the significance of a certain day. Oneshot. Moved from Transformers/Beast Wars to Transformers
Transformers - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 946 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/11/2007 - Published: 11/10/2007 - Bumblebee, Mikaela B. - Complete
Pieces of the Dead by David Hines reviews
Sam and Optimus take a road trip. Movieverse, with some tips of the hat to other formats.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,462 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 257 - Follows: 12 - Published: 11/8/2007 - Complete
CSI: Ark by MoonMadKitty reviews
Oh no! Someone's murdered Bluestreak! Well, not really No problem, Jazz is on the case! Can he solve the Murder Mystery before Prowl forces him to attend staff meetings for the rest of the month? COMPLETE.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 24,513 - Reviews: 128 - Favs: 351 - Follows: 28 - Published: 8/29/2007 - Complete
Harry Potter and The Big Scary Metal Things by Spawn Guy reviews
A crossover fic that is more than meets the eye. Absolutely no apologies for character death.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 960 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 8 - Published: 7/1/2007 - Complete
Rain Over Blue Water by The Starhorse reviews
Some days you just lose your cool and bite some heads off. Sideswipe is no exception.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,567 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 266 - Follows: 22 - Published: 6/6/2006 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Kiss Me, Then Let's Rock & Roll reviews
Ratchet had to leave the Twins behind when he volunteered to follow Prime in the search for the Allspark. How did their romance ever come about, and what will happen when the Twins finally arrive on Earth? Rated M for later chapters.
Transformers - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 12,139 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 7/16/2010 - Published: 6/22/2009 - Ratchet
Planet Mudball reviews
Crashing on an unstable planet, our heroine needs help getting home. Will playing a Good Samaritan to a Predator get her any closer to home or just closer to death?
Aliens/Predator - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 19,164 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 2/15/2009 - Published: 6/1/2008
Oreo reviews
Jazz and Prowl and Oreos. For a LJ challenge. One-shot.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 232 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/11/2009 - Jazz, Prowl - Complete
Vanilla Becomes Spicy reviews
Warning: rated M for a reason. Slash/bondage/discipline/dark/graphic descriptions. Don't like, don't read. G1 - Where Prowl gets his revenge on Jazz - or so he thinks.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,692 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/26/2008 - Prowl, Jazz - Complete
Chocolate and Vanilla reviews
Warning: rated M for a reason. Slash/bondage/graphic descriptions. Don't like, don't read. G1 - Jazz shows Prowl a new way to have a good time.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,236 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 9 - Published: 11/12/2008 - Jazz, Prowl - Complete
Mechanoid vs Monster Worm: A Scientific Abstract reviews
Dr. Michael Avery was lost to the far reaches of space and unable to publish his research paper. Transcribed from Sector Seven's records, here is his abstract. Giant Sentient Mechanoid Battles Monster Worm on Alien Planet.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 451 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 6/6/2008 - Complete
MP3 on Parade reviews
Ten songs, ten shorts. My first posting.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,071 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/22/2008 - Complete
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