blondie AKA robin
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Joined 01-25-08, id: 1484456, Profile Updated: 05-10-12
Author has written 15 stories for Twilight, and Charles Dickens.

Rejection is harsh:
"Strawberry Blonde - not at all my type."
Eclipse, page 194

You can follow me on twitter in TWO places:

@blondieakarobin and @RobinDeJarnett

You can also find me at RobinDeJarnett.com and find out about my debut novel, Whirlwind.

A note about my stories:

I have to confess, I don't get to all my reviews any more. So to those I don't get to:
Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read my stories, your reviews are great!
And of course, all things twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer, no copyright infringement is intended with any of my stories.


Printable copies and kindle/mobipocket compatible copies of some stories will be available on mediafire.com (all absolutely FREE, of course). What's currently available:

first light(also available on iFic as an audio podcast) (

Dark Side of the Moon (


Dark Side of the Moon
Since Stephenie Meyer will be doing twilight from Edward's POV, I thought I would take a stab at new moon, EPOV.

WINNER: The BELLIES Best Missing Moment (Canon Award) Thanks to everyone who voted!

For your convenience, I've made a PDF version and ebook version available at:
Dark Side of the Moon

Thanks to everyone who's come along on this sad, sad journey!

There's a discussion thread for the story over on twilighted.net

Check out the videos that have been made for this fic:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-ETlZD0U4Y
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-v0eonIh2Y
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrxYNjyBLtk

And this one is just cool: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9FMYKa_IsY

Several readers have offered to translate DSotM into various languages, as I get the links, I'll post them here!

- Portuguese (thanks nnfarias)
- Bulgarian (thanks thgiliw)
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5952076/1/Dark_Side_of_the_Moon# - French (thanks Lilouand)

- Swedish discussion about Dark Side

THANKS SO MUCH TO ALL MY FABULOUS READERS! I'm blown away by the response to this story!

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

How to Hide IT by Make A Choice reviews
This is why secrets are born. 1. Out of jealousy, 2. Out of fear, 3. Out of love. Is that why it hurts so much when a secret gets out? Maybe it depends on the secret and what happens after it's out...or maybe it's finding out the truth. Human.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 36,442 - Reviews: 622 - Favs: 154 - Follows: 254 - Updated: 8/29/2015 - Published: 6/1/2008 - Bella, Edward
An Introduction to Swirl and Daisy by m81170 reviews
A first kiss, a first dance, a first curse word shared between best friends. This is the tale of a boring, young geek and the social pariah who thought the world of him. A tale of growing up. A tale of a Non-Romantic Romance.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 212,915 - Reviews: 14983 - Favs: 7,942 - Follows: 7,036 - Updated: 1/4/2015 - Published: 1/4/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Sacrifices by Enthralled reviews
When Edward left Bella, he did so in the hopes that she would have a happy, human life. What would happen if she did just that, but it turned out that things didn't go as either of them planned? Edward & Bella AU
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 59 - Words: 322,466 - Reviews: 6070 - Favs: 4,347 - Follows: 3,042 - Updated: 12/22/2013 - Published: 12/10/2007 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Dead Confederates by goldenmeadow reviews
Sultry, scary, Southern Gothic. A good ol' vamp with bad intentions, Eddie lives large as ever on the down-low, down South. Always under his skin, Bella's just sass in a frosty glass. **INSPIRED AWARDS WINNER Best Vampires & Best Bella** AU/M
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 38 - Words: 338,303 - Reviews: 1882 - Favs: 1,568 - Follows: 947 - Updated: 6/14/2013 - Published: 6/2/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Puppet Master by Glitch in the System reviews
What's eating Paul? What's with that flame on the water? What was Laurent doing just standing in Edward and Bella's meadow? Why does Edward care about Mike's car? Why doesn't Alice know about her past? Cammy knows.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 86 - Words: 459,087 - Reviews: 4762 - Favs: 1,990 - Follows: 1,649 - Updated: 12/13/2012 - Published: 3/24/2008
The Inevitable by Endlessly Drowning reviews
It's been seventy five years since Edward left Bella in Forks. Now the family has decided it's time to return. What will they find when they get there? And how will Edward deal with the pain?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 43,921 - Reviews: 2200 - Favs: 2,421 - Follows: 952 - Updated: 4/24/2012 - Published: 10/29/2007 - Complete
How My Life was Ruined in 14 Days by moon.witche reviews
Bella has a plan. It's a detailed plan for her whole life. But in her quest for perfection, she has skipped certain high school experiences. With graduation fast approaching, Bella concocts a new plan – a plan to lose her virginity. BxE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 62,366 - Reviews: 3804 - Favs: 3,933 - Follows: 3,279 - Updated: 2/3/2011 - Published: 9/15/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Tie Me Down to this World by Struck Upon a Star reviews
AH/AU. Alice and Jasper awake in the same hospital, scarred, broken, and searching for meaning. She gives him peace; he gives her joy. They are each other's hope.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 23 - Words: 163,005 - Reviews: 1868 - Favs: 1,122 - Follows: 947 - Updated: 1/20/2010 - Published: 2/1/2009 - Alice, Jasper
Epitaph for an Empty Grave by Struck Upon a Star reviews
Rosalie Lillian Hale. Born: 10 October, 1915. Died: Unknown. Beloved daughter, devoted sister, cherished friend. 'Non lugenda est mors quam consequitur immortalitas.' Canon, post-Breaking Dawn. Rated M for mature themes. Detailed warning inside.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,188 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 142 - Follows: 16 - Published: 1/3/2010 - Rosalie, Emmett - Complete
Consummation by Mizra reviews
Edward's perspective during the events of Breaking Dawn. From Isle Esme up to Bella's change. 95% Canon, 5% My Own Ideas
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 43,029 - Reviews: 237 - Favs: 412 - Follows: 277 - Updated: 12/18/2009 - Published: 9/9/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Well, This Sucks: Life According to Seth by Krum Cake reviews
Peek into the intimate pages of Seth Clearwater's man-journal as he complains about life, love, and teenage shape-shifter angst. Post BD, canon-compliant, rating for language and sex humor...because Seth is a teenage boy.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 12 - Words: 53,039 - Reviews: 1123 - Favs: 929 - Follows: 798 - Updated: 12/4/2009 - Published: 9/1/2008 - Seth
The Men of Twilight: Twilight TwentyFive by goldenmeadow reviews
Stories written to one-word prompts for the Twi 25 contest. Peek inside the minds of Edward, Jasper, Carlisle, Peter and more. Both AU & Canon in settings and pairings. Love, lust, loss, larking. Each story rated separately. DIVE IN!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 106,456 - Reviews: 460 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 12/1/2009 - Published: 9/15/2009 - Complete
The Lucky Charm by bethaboo reviews
Edward Masen, Boston Red Sox player, meets Bella Dwyer, a reporter assigned to cover the Sox. Edward hates reporters; Bella loathes baseball. Then, the Sox begin to lose. Can she convince him she isn't his unlucky charm? On permanent hiatus.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 28,777 - Reviews: 273 - Favs: 303 - Follows: 383 - Updated: 11/22/2009 - Published: 9/28/2009 - Bella, Edward
We Were Nomads, Bathed in Concrete by Oxymoronic8 reviews
She left before her time. Four years later, he can't let go of what he never had. Oneshot. B/E. Rated M for language & dark themes.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,228 - Reviews: 339 - Favs: 762 - Follows: 135 - Published: 9/28/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Cullenary Educaton: Forks Sex Ed by MarcyJ reviews
Set at the End of Bella's Junior Year. Hilarity ensues when the Forks Gang is forced to endure Sex Education class with Coach Clapp. Chapter 1 is Jasper POV, and each subsequent chapter is from the perspective of a different character.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,726 - Reviews: 2145 - Favs: 3,579 - Follows: 1,669 - Updated: 8/28/2009 - Published: 4/2/2007
The Wild and Wacky Adventures of Edward in PE! by LindaRoo reviews
Hilarity ensues when Edward comes back at the end of New Moon and he and Alice get Mrs. Cope to change their schedules to put them in Bella's gym class. How can they appear human when their superhuman athletic aptitudes keep getting in the way?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 12 - Words: 74,371 - Reviews: 1984 - Favs: 2,252 - Follows: 1,685 - Updated: 3/9/2009 - Published: 2/27/2007
May the Best Date Win by amomof5 reviews
After Twilight, Bella spends the happiest summer of her life with Edward. What did they do? Lots of dating!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 32,861 - Reviews: 222 - Favs: 179 - Follows: 190 - Updated: 10/23/2008 - Published: 5/2/2008
Twist of Fate by IsabellaMCullen reviews
What if fate took a different course for Bella Swan? What if, after Edward left her to keep her safe, the wolves were just a minute too late to save her from Laurent? Would she eventually find her way back into Edward's arms? Co-written with TotalEclipse
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 17 - Words: 81,919 - Reviews: 784 - Favs: 458 - Follows: 519 - Updated: 8/23/2008 - Published: 4/29/2008
Pregnant Vampire Bella Joins the Army by MarcyJ reviews
The ultimate combination of horrific AU plotlines. Cowritten with the hilarious lindaroo! We are writing this a breakneck speed, so look for updates often!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 16,505 - Reviews: 251 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 153 - Updated: 6/21/2008 - Published: 3/1/2008
This is My Beloved Son, in Whom I Am Well Pleased by Minisinoo reviews
Why, after more than two centuries alone, did Carlisle break down and turn a 17-year-old boy? He told Bella it was because Edward's mother had demanded it, but in all his years of life, surely she wasn't the first. Why did this boy get under his skin so?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,799 - Reviews: 139 - Favs: 358 - Follows: 50 - Published: 3/17/2008 - Complete
My Immortal by Somigliana reviews
Bella wakes to immortal life
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,591 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/21/2008 - Complete
Dear Diary by Alice laughed reviews
Quil gives a diary to Claire for her 10th birthday. What's it like growing up with a werewolf protector? See their relationship grow through her eyes. Now complete.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 26 - Words: 53,578 - Reviews: 1478 - Favs: 1,046 - Follows: 278 - Updated: 10/27/2007 - Published: 10/6/2007 - Complete
Quiet Lamentations by MarcyJ reviews
What are the minor characters of the story feeling and thinking during pivotal scenes? Get inside their heads and hear the unsung sorrows and joys that percolate there.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,270 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 6/18/2007 - Published: 5/2/2007
Alice and Renee go to Big Lots to buy Gnomes by LindaRoo reviews
“Spending eternity with a bad flashlight is not something to be taken lightly,” Alice said, her words riddled with cryptic vampirish meaning. “Forever is a long time to be stuck with a cheap LED light, especially when you’re awake at night a lot.”
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,676 - Reviews: 105 - Favs: 126 - Follows: 22 - Published: 4/30/2007 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Dark Side of the Moon reviews
New Moon from Edward's POV. Witness how Edward agonized over leaving Bella, hunted for Victoria, faced the Volturi, and came to realize that with Bella was where he was meant to be.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 176,408 - Reviews: 2600 - Favs: 3,507 - Follows: 1,552 - Updated: 2/26/2010 - Published: 5/23/2008 - Edward - Complete
A Dickens of a Dream reviews
A fanciful twilight crossover with 'A Christmas Carol' co-written by NoMoreThanUsual and blondie
Crossover - Charles Dickens & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 19,645 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 2/19/2010 - Published: 12/24/2009 - Bella - Complete
Seduction reviews
Bella was intent on seducing Edward, but somehow he managed to get a ring on her finger. His side of the story may surprise you - or maybe it won't! Chapter 20 "Compromise" of eclipse from EPOV.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,917 - Reviews: 169 - Favs: 501 - Follows: 103 - Published: 5/20/2009 - Edward, Bella
Fruit Cots and English Cucumbers reviews
My own crazy crackfic. A silly drabble about Esme and banana hammocks. Posted by request of Alice Laughed, in honor of Admittedly Obsessed.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 724 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 10 - Published: 2/12/2009 - Esme, Bella - Complete
With Great Restraint reviews
A Breaking Dawn Missing Moment - At the wedding reception, Bella and Jacob discussed her honeymoon plans. At the same time, Edward dances with Tanya...and the same subject arises. This one-shot parallels pages 61-66 in Breaking Dawn.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,405 - Reviews: 113 - Favs: 228 - Follows: 51 - Published: 12/3/2008 - Edward, Tanya - Complete
A Changing Heart reviews
Edward's experience during Bella's change. Parallels pages 355-378 in Breaking Dawn.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,793 - Reviews: 273 - Favs: 617 - Follows: 96 - Published: 8/19/2008 - Edward, Renesmee C./Nessie - Complete
Music Lessons reviews
SPOILERS FOR BREAKING DAWN. A missing moment from the book, some fatherly bonding time. Fluffy one-shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,152 - Reviews: 200 - Favs: 382 - Follows: 53 - Published: 8/8/2008 - Edward, Jacob - Complete
As Bella Sleeps reviews
A Midnight Sun-like one-shot. Edward hears Bella say 'I love you' for the first time. In his words.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,266 - Reviews: 234 - Favs: 556 - Follows: 98 - Updated: 5/23/2008 - Published: 1/31/2008 - Complete
first light reviews
Bella and Edward face what may be their greatest challenge: Marriage. One threat still stands between the couple and their fairy tale ending. Bella is the key to protecting the Cullens; but can she find enough control in time to save them?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 23 - Words: 68,543 - Reviews: 487 - Favs: 745 - Follows: 173 - Updated: 5/23/2008 - Published: 1/28/2008 - Complete
Brotherhood reviews
The Cullen boys go hunting. Jasper can't stop quoting the Princess Bride, Emmett can't stop quoting Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and Edward, rather put out, responds with Shakespeare. Hilarity ensues! Cowritten with the awesomely funny LindaRoo!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,198 - Reviews: 192 - Favs: 288 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 4/13/2008 - Published: 3/31/2008 - Complete
Totality reviews
Various stories from Eclipse written in Edward's POV. Newest addition: Spontaneous Combustion.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,277 - Reviews: 285 - Favs: 410 - Follows: 188 - Updated: 3/20/2008 - Published: 3/5/2008
Verbal Engagement reviews
Bella and Edward tell Charlie and Renee of their wedding plans. One-shot, could be considered an extra to 'first light'
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,825 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 25 - Published: 2/25/2008 - Complete
The Souvenir reviews
During his time away from Carlisle and Esme, Edward encounters someone famous, well infamous. A darker side of Edward... Response to sillybella's President's Day Challenge.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,738 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 7 - Published: 2/18/2008 - Complete
Phoenix Rising reviews
Edward races through Phoenix to save Bella. Midnight Sun-like double shot. Parallels 'Hide and Seek' and 'Angel' in twilight.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,852 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 201 - Follows: 50 - Published: 2/10/2008 - Complete
Drastic Measures reviews
What if Bella HAD to be changed due to dire circumstances? A study in the form of an alternative ending to Eclipse. One-shot
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,178 - Reviews: 107 - Favs: 195 - Follows: 36 - Published: 2/7/2008 - Complete
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