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 Author has written 29 stories for Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Just Add Magic, Alexa & Katie, Misc. Plays/Musicals, Mortal Instruments, and Greek Mythology. Hola amiga! MY TUMBLR: CHOCOCHIPREADER MY PINTEREST: WIZARDSHIPPEROFCALEOANDPERCABETH Hi! If you want me to beta your stories just shoot me a PM or review and I'll get back to you. • . * :. . . . :. . • . . . . • . :. . • * . … . * . . . . . * . … . . • . * :. . . . . . :. . • :. . • :. . • . . . :. . • . * . . . . * . . . :. . • . * :. . . . :. . • . . . . • . :. . • * . … .ENJOY READING MY PROFILE * . . . . . * . … . . • . * :. . . . . . :. . • :. . • . • . . * . . :. . • . . . :. . • . * . . . . * . . . :. . • . * :. . . . :. . • . . . . • . :. . • * . … . * . . . . . * . … . . • . * :. . . . . . :. . • :. . • :. . • . . . :. . • . * . . . . * WHICH I STOLE FROM OTHER WRITERS. . . :. . • . * :. . . . :. . • . . . . • . :. . • * . … . * . . . . . * . … . . • . . * . … . . • . * :. . . . * . …. . :. . • . * . . . . * . . . :. .. • . * . . . . * . . . :. ... *...*• :. . •:..*..•..*...*.• ...*... * . … . . • . .:. "A reader lives a thousand lives before they die but the man who never reads lives only once." My absolute favourite songs who everybody needs to know hence the reason I'm putting the lyrics: Help, Oh Well by SomethingElseYT: Help I don't own these stories: 24. 'Return of the Messiah' by Huntfrog In the year 2026 the Messiah came back down to Earth. She performed miracles and cured the sick. There was no doubt as to her authenticity. She appeared to all nations at once. All believed. All worshipped her. Some time later, after this period of our history known as the Age of Peace, She dropped a bombshell on us. She warned us that Heaven was almost full. Nobody had gone to Hell during this Age. There were a fixed amount of spots left. Paradise would be closed to all who died after the Gates close. That is when the Mass Suicides began. Taking your own life, She had told us, was not a sin if you died a pious man. The race was on! She looked on and was pleased. She returned to her home, to her throne of fire and flames, and greeted all with a nod of her wicked horns. Song: Fingers Down My Spine (Moriah Elizabeth), Do what ya gotta do, Did I mention, Night falls, it's going down, what's my name (All From Disney Descendants), Teenage Lullaby by Oyyy catchphrase: ooh thee la-la Favourite pjo, hoo characters_ Girls (least to most; though I like them all) #3. Annabeth #2Piper #1. Hazel. Favourite boy is Leo In mark of athena, I cried when percy got angry with Leo. Leo is mah life. 98 per cent of authors confuse "you're" and "your". If you're one of the 2 per cent who knows how to tell them apart, copy and paste this into your profile.( YOU'RE IS YOU ARE AND YOUR IS THIS BELONGS TO YOU.) See that boy doing his homework in homeroom? Last night he talked his friend out of suicide. See that young boy you had made fun of for always being sick? He has to walk home in the snow cause his family is too poor. The girl you just called fat? She is overdosing on diet pills. The girl you just called ugly? She spends hours putting makeup on hoping people will like her. The boy you just tripped? He is abused enough at home. See that man with the ugly scars? He fought for his country. That guy you just made fun of for crying? His mother is dying. Put this as your profile if you're against bullying. I bet 95% of you won't put this on your profile, but I'm sure the people with a heart and backbone will I think I wrote this when I was eight or somethings, so here you go! Chapter 1. THE MONITORS “ And the monitors are-” mira was trembling so bad, anybody looking at her would think that she was sitting in Antarctica wearing no more than just a thin summer frock. Yesterday she had raised her hand for ten long minutes when Nidhi ma’am asked who all wanted to be a monitor. Sure, her hand ached for the whole day after that but it showed nidhi ma’am how desperate she was to be a monitor. “ please let me be one of the monitors.” Chanted Mira under her breath. “ so the electricity monitor is Anika. Come here please. Whenever the class goes out, it is your job to switch off all the lights” Anika nodded. Mira and her best friend Shruti exchanged angry looks. Anika was their nemesis. The two fourth - graders hated Anika with all their heart. Shruti clutched the first pencil she saw and scribbled a note to Mira: “ Anika looks like a pig” accompanied by a drawing of a pig with two braids. “Shruti “ said Nidhi ma’am. “You are the lunch monitor. Kindly make sure nobody wastes their lunch. “ -” Yes ma’am.” “ Mira, you are the class monitor. Take this key and never forget to lock the doors when the class is gone. We do not want to come back to find stray dogs in our class! I have faith that you will keep the class as quiet as a village at midnight when the teachers are not present in the class.” Saying that, the bell rang and Nidhi ma’am quickly gathered her books as Shweta strolled into the classroom to conduct the maths lesson. FANFICTION- UNITED NATIONS!! Has anyone else noticed how a lot of us get along and make friends on here and we can be from completely different countries? WTH!? We're here making world peace on the INTERNET and we have all those ambassadors and senators and whatever struggling with it!! If you realize this (or read this and agreed) copy and paste this and add your name and country (country is optional) to the list. SPREAD THE PEACE!!: Naruto-fan-Okami-chan (USA), NaraTemari011 (Puerto Rico), Lala girl in Lalaland (USA), Kakashi Forever (England), ChiyoChiyamamoto (USA), Crazy-Monkey13 (USA) Mittensx7768 (USA), Darkness Incarnated (USA), monkeygirl77 (USA), Secret (Scotland UK), dragonswoe (England), just a tad bit insane(USA), WritingGoddess12 (USA), Olympus Angel (England), IAmTheUltimateFangirl(India), Alexandra Goddess of Heroes(USA)Skyatnight13(INDIA) Favourite quote: when life gives you lemons, spray them into someones eyes (i made this following one up: when life gives you bullies, be mean to them) Favourite cartoon: My Little Pony, Teen Titans GO Favourite youtbe channel: RyanCOMEDY, Random zodiac compilitions, TikTok compilitions, Moriah Elizabeth, Project Nightfall favourite TV Show: Alexa and Katie ; Just Add Magic Mystery city; Bizaardvark Favourite Color: BLACK Bullies...they're tough to handle. Feel free to say this to your bully: WHEN THEY SAY YOU SHOULD BE GLAD THEY ARE POINTING OUT YOUR MISTAKES (MEAN COMMENT BULLYING) OR BE SASSY. #PER-SASS-Y JAAAAACKSON If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? I would change it to MeHasAPen Last story you favorited? It's Just A Date by Jonathan Priest And author? Percyjackson3 Are you friends with anyone on this site? Of Course! I'm good friends with LOBlack, Annabeth McGrace and Beardedragonlover One neccessity in life? Clean bathrooms What are you most proud of yourself for? My hair. Who do you love most? My little brother. Last Emoji you used? (pleading eyes) Describe yourself Sarcastic, smart, nurturing, pretty, confident? Describe your friends in emojis. Annabeth McGrace- ️ *facepalm, heart, books, unicorn* Beardedragonlover-*dragon, heart, heartface, chocolate, books* Describe yourself in emojis- ️*too many* Here are some letters from the gods to Annabeth on her birthday... Zeus- Happy birthday. Hera- I hate you, you little B- *Ahem* Athena- Annabeth dear, you are my favourite daughter and are yet another year older. You are getting so old... Mother loves you.️ Aphrodite- omg! Happy birthday! we should go shopping for your birthday at the Pacific mall! ️ Hades- Congratulations. you are another year closer to your death at age 99. The Percy Jackson Pledge I promise to remember Percy Whenever I'm at sea I promise to remember Annabeth Whenever a spider comes at me I promise to protect nature For Grover's sake of course I promise to remember Luke When my heart fills with remorse I promise to remember Chiron Whenever I see a sign that says ''Free Pony Ride'' I promise to remember Tyson Whenever a friend says they'll stick by my side I promise to remember Thalia Whenever a friend is scared of heights I promise to remember Clarisse Whenever I see someone that gives me a fright I promise to remember Bianca Whenever I see a sister scold her younger brother I promise to remember Nico Whenever I see someone who doesn't get along with others I promise to remember Rachel Whenever a limo passes my car. I promise to remember Hazel Whenever I see something gold I promise to remember Frank Whenever I see a boy with a lady who is old I promise to remember Octavian Whenever I see a teddy bear I promise to remember Reyna Whenever I see someone who is always fair I promise to remember Jason Whenever I see someone on a missing list I promise to remember Leo Whenever I'm aboard a ship I promise to remember Piper Whenever I see a dove I promise to remember Percabeth Whenever I'm in love I promise to remember The Stolls when my home is beginning to unsettle. I promise to remember Beckendorf whenever I see someone working metal. I promise to remember Silena whenever a friend takes one for the team I promise to remember Michael Yew whenever I see a smile that gleams. I promise to remember Briares whenever I see someone playing hand games. I promise to remember those lost in the Battle of the Labyrinth whenever I see a cloth in flames. I promise to keep people included For Hestia when she was banished from the gods. I promise to remember those campers who fought against Kronos whenever I see someone go against the odds. Yes I promise to remember PJO Wherever I may go... 93% of American/Canadian teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If your part of the 7 that would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Deidara's Manialoll 4 Ever, Edward's One True Love, ANBU Inu, oceaneyes85253, MaybelleDragon-chan, TheEmoSideOfMe, ChristinaAngel, EdwardlovesChristyalways, Shoelacey, KlutzyBurnette, CrazyHorseNinja, xxIxAMxTHExPIExx, Mamoru4ever, SilentWhiteRose, Velgamidragon, One Crystal Rose, Huskylover94, Darkfang323, Emotive Gothika, CarmelColoredDreams, 00GIRL'SNIGHTOUT00, TheSoulAlchemist, Leenaluvsanime4eva, Mrs Old Gregg, Agent Striker, TheOriginalAussieNinja, The Aussie Rose, CameronR.Goode, Shimmery Diamond, CammieZachZammie, , CaptainBrieOnToast, Summertime15, miaadventure, BookGuru101, BookNerd101010101, FandomQueen713, A very obsessed fangirl, Glitterbutt23, CrystaltheBookworm, skyatnight13 NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG! PJO FANS: say OH MY GODS! NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or I'll tell on you! NORMAL PEOPLE: think PJO fans are stupid NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!!! NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunder storms NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation NORMAL PEOPLE: don't have this on their profile! See that girl you just called fat? She is starving herself. You know that girl you just called ugly? She spends hours putting on make-up hoping people will like her. That boy you just tripped? He is abused enough at home. See that old man you made fun of cause of the ugly scars? He fought for our country. See that young boy you just made fun of for always being sick? He has to walk home in the snow cause his family is too poor. That guy you just made fun of for crying? His mother is dying. Re-Post this if you are against bullying. I bet many of you won't. Your life is probably not as harsh as theirs, or you're just too lazy. Take it as a challenge. You'd be surprised how many people this affects, positively and negatively. A few clicks of your mouse may just save a life, or bring a smile. People call another guy fat. No one knows he has a serious disease causing him to be overweight. People call an old man ugly. No one knew he had a serious injury to his face while fighting for our country in the war. People call a woman bald but they don't know she has cancer. Put this in your profile if you are against bullying and stereotyping. I bet 95% of you won't do Sweetness This is really sweet... When a girl is quiet, a million things are running through her mind. When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply. When a girl looks at you with her eyes full of question, she is wondering how long you will be around. When a girl answers "I'm fine." after a few seconds, she is not fine at all. When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying. When a girl rests her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be her's forever. When a girl wants to see you everday, she wants to be pampered. When a girl says "I love you." she means it. When a girl says "I miss you." nobody could miss you more than that. Life only comes around once, so make sure you spend it with the right person. Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, and calls you back when you hang up on him. The guy who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead, Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats. The one who holds your hand in front of his friends and is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you there for him. The one who turns to his friends and declares "That's her.". If you read this, you have to repost it, guy or girl, or you will have bad luck for the rest of your life. If you repost this, in five minutes your true love will call or message you. Tonight at midnight, they will realize that they love you. Something good will happen at approximately 1:42 pm tomorrow, and it could happen anywhere. So get ready for the biggest shock of your life. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno’t mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset cna be a taotl mses and yuo cna sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the hmuan mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! Fi yuo cna raed tihs add tihs to yrou’e porflie. Can you read this too??? Here is some random stuff I stole off LOBlack's profile: Survey Who's the last person you talked to and what did you say? Me: Hi Bubby. Brother: Hello. Where are you? The dining table Look up, now look back. What did you see? My spanish notebook, water bottle, science textbook, dad's notebook and my brothers bottle What's the last thing you ate? Ham sandwich What's your personality like? Sarcastic, smart, dramatic, creative, introverted, talkative more mature than I should be. (LOBlack, I know this is what you wrote and I only wrote introverted and talkative. I'm sorry. But we are very similar, OK?!) Who do you have a crush on? Not anybody. Had a crush on Leo Valdez till about two months ago, though. What was the last thing you thought? Wut. You have a million dollars. What do you do? Save it for Harvard. What are you eating/drinking RIGHT NOW? Butter Cookies. What are you thinking RIGHT NOW? What to put as an answer. What's it like being you? Wake up. Take a bath. School. TV. Reading. Art. Evening shower. Dinner. TV. Sleep. What are your thoughts on writing? It's amazing. How tall are you? 5". As of 2022, I am going to be 11 years old. What book are you currently reading? My science textbook. I have a test on Southern Plateau's and bones and muscles on Monday the 15th of November 2021. What music are you listening to? Nothing. Last music was ROAR by Katy Perry. Yep, I've been influenced. What was the last website you visited before fan fiction? Tumblr. What was the last thing you cooked? Instant Noodles. What color are the walls of the room you are in? Peach. Do you know who the governor of your state is? It's not on my test, so why would I? How many different programs are open on your computer right now? One. Have you ever been water-skiing? Yes. What is the weather like? Sunny, but cold. It's November, It's India. Please read-true story (This did not happen to me, I copy/pasted it.)I was walking around in a Target store when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back.The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.The Cashier said, 'I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.'Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.'It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas.She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.'I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.'His eyes were so sad while saying this. 'My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''My heart nearly stopped.The little boy looked up at me and said: 'I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.'Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me 'I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.''I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.'Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. 'Suppose we check Again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'''OK' he said, 'I hope I do have enough.' I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money.The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money!'Then he looked at me and added, 'I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!'''I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'''My mommy loves white roses.'A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started.I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma.Was this the family of the little boy?Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away.I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine.And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Kids Are Quick TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ? CLASS: Maria. TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?' GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' TEACHER: No, that's wrong GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it. TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? DONALD: H I J K L M N O. TEACHER: What are you talking about? DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O. TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have fifteen years ago. WINNIE: Me! TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty? GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. ' MILLIE: I is.. TEACHER: No, Millie... Always say, 'I am.' MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.' TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him? LOUIE: Because George still had the axe in his hand. (Viking-style logic) TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook. TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? HAROLD: A teacher Copied from Noureen A The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... teacher has assigned a partner project, and a young girl approaches him, glancing hopefully at two girls chatting excitedly. "Sir," she asks hopefully. "Can we work in groups of threes for this project?" Seeing the glance, the teacher says yes. The girl scampers off. Later, the girl comes back, looking beaten. Her eyes are watering. "Sir," she says, trying not to look at the two girls, who are still chatting. "Could we work alone on this project?" (\ _ /) Girls are like Eve was not taken out of Adam's head to top him, neither out of his feet to be trampled on by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected by him, and near his heart to be loved by him. Matthew Henry If a girl looks swell when she meets you, who gives a damn if she's late? Nobody. -J. D. Salinger Six truths in life 1. You cannot stick your tounge out and look at the ceiling at the same time: a physical impossibility 2. All idiots, after reading this will try it 3. And discovering that it's a lie 4. You are smiling now, because you are an idiot 5. You will soon post this on your profile for other idiots to see 6. There is still a stupid smile on your face If you count as an idiot, post this on your profile! Just telling you guys, I totally fell for this. =) (= '.'=) This is bunny. ('')_('') Copy and paste bunny onto your profile to help him gain world domination. These are actual labels on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair). On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)? On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...) On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?) On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...) On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?) On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.) On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere) On a hair straightener: "Do not use in water." (Yes, because I always straighten my hair when I'm taking a bath.) On a package of pasta after the cooking insturctions: "Put on fork and eat." (...I thought you used a spoon...) On a can of bug spray:“Harmful to bees”. (I thought I was harmful to ants) On a life-saving device: “This is not a life-saving device”. (Note to self, don't buy from this company) On a TV remote control: “Not dish washer safe”. (So that's why it won't work anymore...) A New Zealand insect spray "Not tested on animals." (Obviously.. you tested it on insects, duh!) A Television Owner’s Manual "Do not pour liquids into your television set." (People really get payed for writing this??) A VCR box says "Instructional video on hooking up your VCR included." (How can you watch it????!!!!!) A can of self-defense pepper spray "May irritate eyes." (Really???) A can of windscreen de-icing spray "Spray works in sub-zero temperatures." (That helps a lot) A cardboard sunshield that keeps sun off the dashboard "Do not drive with sunshield in place." (Well, that explains a lot.) A cartridge for a laser printer "Do not eat toner." (Awww... but it tastes good) A computer mouse "Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers." (Where did they get that idea...) A dishwasher carries this warning "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher." (Oh...Sorry kids can't play in there anymore...) A popular manufactured fireplace log "Caution - Risk of Fire." (What's it supposed to do...play music?) A rubber ball toy "Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball." (Isn't that why I'm buying it?) A sharpening stone "Knives are sharp." (You don't say!) A snowblower warns "Do not use snowthrower on roof." (And how exactly am I supposed to get a snowthrower on the roof?) A baby stroller "Remove child before folding." (Oh. Better go get little Bobby out...) A pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists "Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover." (Aww, man.) An electric router made for carpenters "This product not intended for use as a dental drill." (Shoot. There goes my quick fix to this cavity.) An "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter "Do not use near fire, flame or sparks." (Okay... then how am I suppose to use it?) A rock garden "Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." (Ah.) A Fruit Roll-Up snack "Remove plastic before eating." (That's why it doesn't taste good...) On a bag of Marshmellows: "Flammable" (Really? I thought they were fire resistant...oops...) REVIEW AND YOU YES, YOU WILL RECIVE ONE FREE SHOUT-OUT! YOU DONT EVEN HAVE TO PAY SHIPPING AND HANDLING NORMAL PEOPLE: Rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast PJO FANS: Will tell Zeus to make it rain NORMAL PEOPLE: Say OMG! PJO FANS: Say OH MY GODS! NORMAL PEOPLE: Go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings PJO FANS: Won't go to one because they will take away their awesome demigod powers NORMAL PEOPLE: Say shut up or I'll tell on you! PJO FANS: Say shut up or my godly parent will vaporize you! NORMAL PEOPLE: Think that PJO fans are stupid PJO FANS: Know that normal people are stupid NORMAL PEOPLE: When being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY! PJO FANS: When being chased use their demigod powers NORMAL PEOPLE: Get nervous/scared during thunderstorms PJO FANS: Yell at Zeus to calm down NORMAL PEOPLE: Would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation PJO FANS: Would try and find Camp Half Blood NORMAL PEOPLE: would run if the were being chased PJO FANS: would say 'I have a pen!' NORMAL PEOPLE: Don't have this on their profile PJO FANS: Would have this on their profile already!!!! Random Break In The Line Named Addiso Dear math, I am not your therapist. It is time for you to grow up and solve your own problems. Also, stop asking me to find your X. She is NOT coming back to you. Don't ask Y, just accept it. COPY AND PASTE THIS IF YOU AGREE ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... sSs ... ... ... ... s.. ... ... ... ... ... if you're a girl, and you've ever ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... sSSS? ... ... .s..sS ... ... ... ... ... . beaten a guy in an arm wrestle, ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ..sSSS. ... .sS.. sSS.. ... ... ... ... ... ... . copy the Flaming Heart ... ... ... ... ... ... ..sSSSS.. ... .sS.. .SS . ... ... ... ... ... ... ... into your profile! ... ... ... ... ... ... . SSSSS... ... ... sS... S.. ... ... ... ... ... ... . (sorry guys, girls only) ... ... ... ... S. ... .SSSSSSs ... ... .sS... , ... ... ... ...sS. ... SSSSSSSs. ... .SSS.. ... . ... ... ... ... SS ... .SSSSSSs.. ... SSs , ... ... ... ...S. ... .SSSSSSSs .sSSS.. ... .. ... ... ... ... SS... ... SSSSS..SSSS... s ... ... ... ... SSs ... ...SSSSSSSSS ... sS ... ... ... ... .SSs... ... ..SSSSSsSSSS ... sSS ... ... ... ..s...SSSS ... ..sSSSSSSSS. ..s SS ... ... ... .SS.. sSSSS..sSSSSSSSSSSSSS S ... ... ... sS.sSSSSsSSSSSSSSSSSSSS S ... ... ... .sSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS ... ... ...sSSSssssSSSSSSSSSSsssssssSSS ... ... SSssSSSSsSSSSSSSSSsssssssSSSSS ... ...sSsssSSSSsSSSSSSSSSssssssSSSSSs ... .. sSSsssSSSSSSSSSSSSSSssssSSSSSSs ... ... sSSSssSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSsssSSSSSs ... ... .ssSSsssSSSSsSSSSSSSSSssssSSSSs ... ... ..sSSSSsSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSssSSSSs ... ... ... .sSSsSSSsssSSSsssSSSsSSsSss ... ... ... ... ..sSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSs ... ... ... ... ... ..sSSSsSSSSsSsSSSSSs ... ... ... ... ... ... .sSSSSSssSSSSSs ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .sSSSSsSSSs ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .sSssSs ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .sSs If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile. (we do this ALL the time...im sooo not kidding) "Most people learn by observation, and there are the few who learn by experimentation. And then there are those who actually TOUCH the fire to see if it's really hot." -Anonymous (Haven't done that, but I stop writing for a while because of a bad burn...you'll know why.) If you lack common sense, copy and paste this onto you're profile. If you ever wondered who made up all of the 'copy this into your profile' things then copy this into your profile. If you hate Luke and you want to be the one to push him off a mountain, copy and paste this into your profile. If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your If you want to be a writer someday, copy and paste this into your profile. If sarcasm is your first and favorite language, then copy & paste this into your profile. If you have ever had done something or said something that made perfect sense to your real friends and only caused your "peers" to look at you strangely and roll their eyes, copy and paste this into your profile. If you repeatedly read page 203 in The Battle of the Labyrinth, copy and paste this in your profile.!! If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get, like, two reviews, copy this into your profile. If you are that person who, after they post a story, check their stats minute after minute and shout for joy when you get ONE review... copy and paste this on your profile! If Fanfiction to you is what Facebook is to other people, copy this to your profile. if you only read PJO fanfiction stories if the summary says PERCABETH, copy and paste this into your profile If you really, really hate when people tell you to read stupid books when you could be reading PJO, copy this into your profile. If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile. Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia: the fear of long words. Now what SmartAss came up with that? If you think that is really funny, but can't pronounce it, copy and paste this into your profile. If you Yell at people who think PJO is stupid copy this to your profile If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile. If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile. If your reading fanfics when your supposed to be studying for a major test the next day, and telling your parents your studying, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile. When life gives you lemons, make apple jucie and let life wonder how the heck you did it! If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile. If you don't review, I won't write. If I don't write, you won't review. If you think people should review after they read, copy and paste this on your profile. Chocolate chip cookies are the best!! If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile!! If you're easily confused or confuzzled add this to your profile. I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you!! When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them. i wish i had a boyfriend that would do these things... What a TRUE boyfriend would do for you: When she walks away from you mad When she stare's at your mouth When she pushes you or hits you When she start's cussing at you When she's quiet When she ignore's you When she pull's away When you see her at her worst When you see her start crying When you see her walking When she's scared When she lay's her head on your shoulder When she steal's your favorite hat When she tease's you When she doesnt answer for a long time When she look's at you with doubt When she say's that she like's you When she grab's at your hands When she bump's into you When she tell's you a secret When she looks at you in your eyes When she misses you When you break her heart When she says its over When she repost this bulletin - Stay on the phone with h er even if shes not saying anything. - When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go - When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her - because 10 yrs later she'll remember you - Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her - Call her before you sleep and after you wake up - Treat her like she's all that matters to you. - Tease her and let her tease you back. - Stay up all night with her when she's sick. - Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid. - Give her the world. - Let her wear your clothes. - When she's bored and sad, hang out with her. - Let her know she's important. - Kiss her in the pouring rain. - When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; If you post this in the next 4 minutes you crush will: Awww...luv this. Natural Highs 1. Falling in love. ~Facts~Of~Life~ Being mature is overrated. Being weird is like being normal, only better. I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me. Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright. One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject. It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone. I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life? As you make your way through this hectic world of ours, set aside a few minutes each day. At the end of the year, you'll have a couple of days saved up. Silence is golden, duct tape is silver When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world wonder how you did it. Life is like a pack of gum . . . I've yet to figure out why. Be insane . . . because well behaved girls never made history. If your name is Mr.Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch? My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil. Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out. To the world, you are just one person, but to one person, you are the world One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions. It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I’ve found it? Person #1: Happiness is just around the corner! Growing old is mandatory . . . growing up is optional . . . We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But we teenage girls are good at 2 things: Staying Strong, and Being Ourselves. Life was so simple when boys had cooties! Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young. I'm not random, I just have many thougt- OH! A SQUIRREL! uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food. REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food. FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong. REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn… we really messed up … but that sure was fun!” FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry. REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you. FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back. REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it’s yours. FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you. REAL FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you. FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you. FAKE FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door. REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!” FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile. REAL FRIENDS: Are for life. FAKE FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world. REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what’s wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better! FAKE FRIENDS: Make you say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours. REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out. If you think moustache smileys shall dominate the smiley world, copy and paste this onto your profile If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you carry a pen in your pocket all day and think it might turn into a sword when you uncap it, copy and paste this onto your profile If you think Annabeth is watching you under her magical Yankee's cap, paste this into your profile If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile if you are on team Leo, copy and paste this into your profile If you really, really hate when people tell you to read stupid books when you could be reading PJO, copy this into your profile If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile. If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile. If there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile. If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile. If you have dreams where you are taken to Camp Half-Blood and you are claimed, copy and paste this onto your profile If you have friends that fit the description of satyrs or children of gods, copy and paste this onto your profile If you think that girls are equals to boys, copy and paste this on your profile. If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile If you think the Cocoa Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to Arkham Asylum, copy this into your profile. Some people are like slinkies...they're really good for nothing...but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs! If you agree with this, copy and paste this into your profile If you've ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile If you've ever randomly fallen out of your chair, copy this into your profile If you've ever fallen going up the stairs, copy this into your profile If you think girls are awesome and don't have to LOWER their standards to be EQUAL to men, copy this into your profile. Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which makes weird good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy paste this onto your profile If you think that explaining your music style to someone is like teaching a foreign language that doesn't exist, copy and paste this into your profile lets eat kids! Lets eat, kids! Commas save lives. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile If you have the emotional turmoil of shipping yourself with a fictional character but also shipping that fictional character wit another fictional character and realizing that you can never actually meet that fiction character you're in love with in real life, so you buy a bunch of cats and name them after all of the fictional characters your in love with and... Just copy and paste this into your profile if you feel my pain. If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever thought of something funny, started laughing, and fell hit your head on something hard, and ended up laughing harder than you were before, copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever just burst out laughing at something you thought of in a quiet room and everyone turns to look at you, copy and paste this into your profile Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?" If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly stupid, copy and paste this into your profile If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile If you copy and pasted most of your profile from one person, copy and paste this into your profile. If your a Demigod copy and paste this into your profile IF YOU HAVE SPELLED YOUR NAME WRONG PASTE THIS IN YOUR PROFILE If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile. If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. WHETHER IT'S BETWEEN TWO MALES, TWO FEMALES, OR A MALE AND A FEMALE, LOVE IS LOVE!! ...if you agree, put this in your profile When Drowning… Mortal: LIFEGUARD! PJO fan: PERCY! When rain suddenly comes… Mortal: Damn it! PJO fan: Grab a tissue Zeus! Exclaiming… Mortal: Oh My god! PJO fans: Di Immortales! Love is Love :) Important Things I Learned From Rick Riordan: Even cat goddesses like growling at birds. Underwater kisses are way better than normal ones The five elements are earth, air, fire, water, and cheese. Children of rival gods can fall in love. No one really knows why the Egyptians wrote without vowels. Nemean lions can be defeated with freeze dried ice cream. Eating fruit bats is bad for your health. Contrary to popular belief, hellhounds can be domesticated. The Set animal does not appreciate being named Leroy. Yes, that twelve year old wearing a silver jacket is a goddess. Jackal headed gods can be very attractive. Math teachers really are evil. Set's secret name is Evil Day. It's not easy to insult a daughter of Athena. Elvis was a magician. No, really. Do not trust the bald man who wants to sell you a water bed. Hieroglyphics are fun to read. A god of toilet paper can actually be really cool. Demons will give you free samples if you ask nicely. Favorite quotes and lyrics: "It takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart" -Finnick Odair "When your gone I'm a match that's burning out" - ALL TIME LOW Maybe I'm too emotional But your apathy's like a wound in salt Maybe I'm too emotional Maybe you never cared at all Maybe I'm too emotional But your apathy's like a wound in salt Maybe I'm too emotional Maybe you never cared at all ~Olivia Rodrigo When you carry a holy book, the devil gets a headache When you open it, he collapses When he sees you reading it, he faints When he sees you living it, he flees Just when you try to re-post this, he will try to discourage you. Hear that voice that says you are stupid and this is silly? Why do we SLEEP in church, but stay awake for the two-hour MOVIE? Why is it so HARD to talk about God, but so EASY to gossip? Why are we so BORED when we look at a Christian magazine, but find it EASY to read Playboy? Why is it so easy to IGNORE a Godly Facebook post, but we REPOST the nasty ones? Why are CHURCHES getting smaller, but BARS and CLUBS are growing? repost if you truly believe in GOD. per perc percy percyj percyja percyjac percyjack percyjacks percyjackso percyjackson percyjackso percyjacks percyjack percyjac percyja percyj percy perc per pe p a an ann anna annab annabe annabet annabeth annabethc annabethch annabethcha annabethchas annabethchase annabethchas annabethcha annabethch annabethc annabeth annabet annabe annab anna ann an a t th tha thal thali thalia thaliag thaliagr thaliagra thaliagrac thaliagrace thaliagrac thaliagra thaliagr thaliag thalia thali thal tha th t j ja jas jaso jason jasong jasongr jasongra jasongrac jasongrace jasongrac jasongra jasongr jasong jason jaso jas ja j p pi pip pipe piper piperm pipermc pipermcl pipermcle pipermclea pipermclean pipermclea pipermcle pipermcl pipermc piperm piper pipe pip pi p l le leo leov leova leova leoval leovald leovalde leovaldez leovalde leovald leoval leova leov leo le l h ha haz haze hazel hazell hazelle hazellev hazelleve hazelleves hazellevesq hazellevesqu hazellevesque hazellevesqu hazellevesq hazelleves hazelleve hazellev hazelle hazell hazel haze haz ha h f fr fra fran frank frankz frankzh frankzha frankzhan frankzhang frankzhan frankzha frankzh frankz frank fran fra fr f c cl cla clar clari claris clariss clarisse clarissel clarissela clarisselar clarisselaru clarisselarue clarisselaru clarisselar clarissela clarissel clarisse clariss claris clari clar cla cl c n ni nic nico nicod nicodi nicodia nicodian nicodiang nicodiange nicodiangel nicodiangelo nicodiangel nicodiange nicodiang nicodian nicodia nicodi nicod nico nic ni n b bi bia bian bianc bianca biancad biancadi biancadia biancadian biancadiang biancadiange biancadiangel biancadiangelo biancadiangel biancadiange biancadiang biancadian biancadia biancadi biancad bianca bianc bian bia bi b g gr gro grov grove grover groveru groverun groverund groverunde groverunder groverunderw groverunderwo groverunderwoo groverunderwood groverunderwoo groverunderwo groverunderw groverunder groverunde groverund groverun groveru grover grove grov gr g j ju jun juni junip junipe juniper junipe junip juni jun ju j s sa sal sall sally sallyj sallyja sallyjac sallyjack sallyjacks sallyjackso sallyjackson sallyjacksonb sallyjacksonbl sallyjacksonblo sallyjacksonblof sallyjacksonblofi sallyjacksonblofis sallyjacksonblofi sallyjacksonblof sallyjacksonblo sallyjacksonbl sallyjacksonb sallyjackson sallyjackso sallyjacks sallyjack sallyjac sallyja sallyj sally sall sal sa s p pa pau paul paulb paulbl paulblo paulblof paulblofi paulblofis paulblofi paulblof paulblo paulbl paulb paul pau pa p When you were 5, your mom gave you a ice cream cone. You thank her by yelling at her that it's the wrong kind. A poem about Child Abuse My name is Lucifer I am three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see, I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad? I wish I were better I wish I weren’t ugly, Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me. I can’t do a wrong I can’t speak at all Or else im locked up All day long. When im awake im all alone The house is dark My folks aren’t home When my mommy does come home I'll try and be nice, So maybe ill just get One whipping tonight. I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie’s bar. I hear him curse My name is called I press myself Against the wall I try to hide From his evil eyes I’m so afraid now I’m starting to cry He finds me weeping Calls me ugly words, He says its my fault He suffers at work. He slaps and hits me And yells at me more, I finally get free And run to the door He’s already locked it And i start to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken, "I’m sorry!", I scream But its now much to late His face has been twisted Into a unimaginable shape The hurt and the pain Again and again O please God, have mercy! O please let it end! And he finally stops And heads for the door While i lay there motionless Brawled on the floor My name is Lucifer I am three, Tonight my daddy Murdered me Now i roam the underworld, to help those in need. I may seem evil, but i'm not. And if you read this and don’t pass it on I pray for your forgiveness Because you would have to be One heartless person To not be effected By this Poem And because you are effected, Do something about it! So all i ask you to do Is pass this on! Month One Mommy, Month Two Mommy Month Three You know what Mommy Month Four Mommy Month Five You went to the doctor today. Month Six I can hear that doctor again. Month Seven Mommy Every Abortion Is Just . . . One more heart that was stopped. It's OK to be a glowstick. sometimes, we have to break before shining. I'm that girl The one that likes books more than boys. The one who pretends not to be sad, just to make others happy The one who always wonders what she did wrong The one who just wants to help The one that really wants to make a difference The one that sticks to her values The one that refuses to believe that this is it The one that will do anything to make a better tomorrow The one who won't give in The one who won't give up" -By linguisticsrock, Copy and Paste if you can relate to this Ask yourself about your OTP (which happens to be Caleo from HOO). I think this is called an OTP meme. Which one hogs the blanket? LEO! Which one cuts the other hair? CALYPSO CUTS LEO'S HAIR. ("LEO VALDEZ, YOU WILL LET ME CUT YOUR HAIR RIGHT NOW OR WE ARE GETTING A DIVORCE!) Which one makes coffee for the other each morning?LEO FOR CALYPSO Which one picks up the pizza? BOTH (DATE WITH FESTUS) Which one likes their music on full volume? LEO Which one complains about the crumbs in the bed? CALYPSO Which one is ticklish? CALYPSO. (I SURRENDER, LEO!) Which one sings and which one plays the music? CALYPSO IS SAID TO HAVE A BEAUTIFUL VOICE IN THE BOOKS, SO SHE SINGS AND LEO PLAYS SOME CRAZY INSTRUMENT HE INVENTED Which one proposes? LEO! (TAKES CALI ON A WILD FESTUS RIDE. SHE PUNCHES HIM BUT THEN SEES THE BOX AND KISSES HIM) Ask yourself about your OTP (again) (which happens to also be Sizzy from TMI). Which one hogs the blanket? Izzy Which one cuts the other hair? Simon cuts Isabelle's Which one makes coffee for the other each morning? Simon Which one picks up the pizza? Simon Which one likes their music on full volume? Izzy Which one complains about the crumbs in the bed? Simon Which one is ticklish? Izzy Which one sings and which one plays the music? Isabelle sings and Simon plays the music Which one proposes? OK, I've written a one-shot for this and it explains EVERYTHING. Check it out. I, as a reader and fanfiction author, find it increasingly infuriating that stories can get thousands of hits yet only a few reviews. What could take you five or ten minutes to read could have taken someone several hours to write and a lot of planning. Reviews encourage people and make them feel good about the STORY So what? While I hole myself up in a good story, you're off frying your brains. While I lose myself in unknown worlds, you're off playing Minecraft or Warcraft or something. While I learn things you cannot imagine, you're off failing school and your teachers and family. I know more about some characters than I do myself— characters you will never know. I can survive my whole life in a world— a world you will never see. I know the secrets of people, places, and creatures— all of which you will never meet. I could ruin your life if I had the heart to and if you and I were in one of the worlds I know— and you would never tell the difference. I create worlds, people, creatures, but most of all lives with my words that you call another boring subject— something you will never experience the joy and pride of. I have ridden on dragons, outwitted darkness, eluded death a thousand times . . . I have saved lives, used magic, unraveled deathly secrets that could start wars . . . I have swum with the serpents, flown with the pegasi, howled with the wolves . . . I have stood upon the moon, fought in great battles, discovered new universes . . . I have relived long-gone lives, shaped new destinies, guided the paths of others . . . I have stepped into other worlds, become other creatures, experienced unimaginable things . . . I have lived through wars, living nightmares, the worst of tragedies . . . I have felt the joy, pride, and elation of just—knowing. Knowing the fact that you would never learn what I have. And never have I moved a single inch, as long as I read. I have traveled universes while sitting in a corner with a book For you, one glance is what it took To say it was useless and stupid But you can never experience time travel or falling again and again, You can never live the life of the first daughter who hates it or experience victory over dictators, And other things I have, Yet you claim that all of this is boring— Boring, stupid, sad, uncool, dumb, even embarrassing. You say that this is something no one can like. And yet, here I stand, holding a book. If you agree with what I have written, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to make our voices heard: Crystal Silvera, Akronite, Jasminehoran, Anjali Roongta, BlackCatzCorgiz13, Annabeth McGrace, Skyatnight13. Annabeth: It's hard to believe you can teleport using a stick. Hermione: This isn't a stick. It's a wand. You're the one to say. A cap that makes you disappear? Annabeth: It's simple physics. Now tell me what is the science on the splitting of souls. Hermione: Only after you explain to me the lack of DNA in all of you guys. Annabeth: After you explain how to make things float with words and a wand. Hermione: After you explain how a watch can become a giant shield. Annabeth: Hermione: Annabeth: Hermione: Annabeth: Hermione: At least our boyfriends don't sparkle. Annabeth: Right! Bella: HEY! Rearranging The Letters ;) DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters: DIRTY ROOM PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters: BEST IN PRAYER ASTRONOMER: When you rearrange the letters: MOON STARER DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letters: A ROPE ENDS IT THE EYES: When you rearrange the letters: THEY SEE GEORGE BUSH: When you rearrange the letters: HE BUGS GORE THE MORSE CODE: When you rearrange the letters: HERE COME DOTS SLOT MACHINES: When you rearrange the letters: CASH LOST IN ME ANIMOSITY: When you rearrange the letters: IS NO AMITY ELECTION - RESULTS: When you rearrange the letters: LIES - LET'S RECOUNT SNOOZE ALARMS: When you rearrange the letters: ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S A DECIMAL POINT: When you rearrange the letters: IM A DOT IN PLACE THE EARTHQUAKES: When you rearrange the letters: THAT QUEER SHAKE ELEVEN PLUS TWO: When you rearrange the letters: TWELVE PLUS ONE AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE: MOTHER-IN-LAW: When you rearrange the letters: WOMEN HITLER The 27 Commandments of Fanfiction (a few of which I have blatantly ignored in the past) 1. Thou shalt not post a fic until it has been checked for grammar and spelling errors. The fanfiction gods hath given you a spellchecker on the computer for good reason. Use it. Unless it's a glitchy mobile device. 2.Thou shalt not post a chapter of less than 100 words, unless it is a drabble. This displeases the masses. 3.Thou shalt not put author's notes in the middle of the story. 4.Thou shalt NEVER use text-speak in a fic, unless the characters are actually texting. 5.Thou shalt keep to one tense, and only one, throughout the story. Do not switch randomly. 6.Apply the above number 5 to POVs as well. 7. Thou shalt not get offended when someone makes fun of the crack pairing featured in your fanfiction. It probably is rather hilarious. 8.Thou shalt not use :), ;l, or :( or any other variation in a fanfic to show the emotion exhibited by a character. 9.Thou shall try-eth to keep characters in character! 10.Thou shall not treat every criticism as a flame. 11.The author's note is not a spot for your personal drama, and thou shalt not make it so. 12.Thou shalt not put any form of the phrase "first fic" in thy summary. 13. Thy created characters must not have names that exceed five syllables in length. Nor shall thy name have more than five words in length. 14. Thou shall not insert thyself into the storyline as thyself or as a character- yes we know that you are in love with yourself and are very narcissistic, we just don’t want to read about how you end up with the main character. 15.If thou art writing a story that does not follow the original storyline, point it out in the beginning. 16.Thou shall not make a person randomly smart or powerful unless stating a reason for the change (a good reason). 17.Thou shalt show and not tell. 18.Thou shalt not EVER use the phrase "I suck at summaries" in-est thine summary. This annoys thine readers. 19.Thou shalt not write the same way thou speak-est- writing is an art. 20.Thou shalt ALWAYS spell the word "okay" correctly. Using the letter "K" is an unacceptable compromise. 21. Thou shalt only use clichés when thou a) art writing a parody or b) find a new and interesting twist to make such clichés bearable to thine reader. 22. Thou shalt always separate dialogue from two separate speakers in two separate paragraphs. Otherwise, thine readers shalt be confuse-ed. 23. Thou shalt not EVER make a chapter all one paragraph. THIS INFURIATES BOTH THINE READER AND THE FANFICTION GODS. They have given thee an ENTER key with good reason. 24. Thou shalt not write with thy caps lock on, it displeases the masses and causes thy readers to lose their vision and make angels weep. 25. Thou shalt know how to spell the character's names correctly before you writeth the fic. Misspelling the name of the main characters makes readers angry and distracts from the story. 26. Thou shalt not say in thine summary "summary inside". This shows a lack of creativeness and infuriates the masses. The only exception is when a summary is cut short and a continuation of it lies inside. 27. Thou shall use paragraphs and space the story so it is not terrifyingly daunting to thine readers. (Bonus rules-because I can) 28. Thou shall not use links to pictures instead of describing character appearances and scenes. Don't be lazy about this. Please. Links don't always last forever. 29. Thous shalt not add an OC that is overpowered compared to the rest of the characters or that is way too unrealistic (a prime example: a Big Three kid that could do everything Jason and Thalia combined could, plus was so good at self-defense while using electronics and was perfect in almost every way...yeah, no. Been there, seen that, ruined the story for me) 30. Thou shall write thine fanfic as if writing an actual original story, with regards to everything above. 31. Thou shalt not forget the disclaimer. 32. Thou shalt use capitalization. There is a shift key for good reason. Female Comebacks Man: Where have you been all my life? Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Man: Is this seat empty? Man: Your place or mine? Man: So, what do you do for a living? Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Man: Your body is like a temple. Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together Man: Your eyes they're amazing. You know you're obsessed with PJO when: You've read every book in the PJO series at least 5 times You've been caught for reading in class for multiple times Your BFF calls you geek because you sit around and talk about PJO You dream of going to Camp Half-Blood A picture is worth a thousand words. A Percabeth moment is worth 1 billion words. He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Percabeth never dies. To be or not to be? That is the question. The answer? Percabeth. All roads lead to Percabeth. And by the transitive property, total awesomeness. Some people say that Percabeth is a myth. Those "some people" are now dead You just have to research more about greek mythology (Did that. Know almost everything now. :-P) You want to learn Latin You copy/paste this onto your profile Most of your favorite fics are PJO related, even if it is a cross over You have taken every test you can find about what demigodly parent you would/do/should have, and your trying to get your friends to You make sure all of your friends (Or most of them), have an idea about what you say when talking about PJO Your friends (At least one), think you are obbsessed with PJO, and you agree You are planning on adding a lot more things to this list You call yourself a demigod You wish with every fibre of your being that the first page of The Lightning Theif told the truth, and the PJO series is real You find yourself praying to a random god when you didn't study for a math test because you were too busy reading PJO What you call being "too lazy to review" is what we call "a flame to the pages" as the writers. That one minute or two that you felt "too lazy" to review is another minute of creeping discouragement that all writers feel as they begin to think... "Why am I even here…?" "What's even the point of continuing?" "My skills must be terrible…no one cares for my story…" "I'll never be a good writer...I quit." These are only a few thoughts that go through every writer's head- that go through MY head- when we put out a chapter / story with all our heart and soul within, and we sit there…and sit…and wait…and not a single person says even a word. If you're not a writer, you have NO IDEA how much that hurts… If you ARE a writer, then I'm sure you know just how great it feels when someone is kind enough to leave a heartwarming and encouraging review, and you read it, smiling while thinking…"Wow…I did it…" So, why not give fellow writers the same luxury here? Too many times I've seen epic and utterly beautiful works of literary art fall to pieces before finally being abandoned due to the terrible discouragement that the lack of reviews can cause. Sometimes, it is so severe that the very writer himself decides to quit, denying the world his skills of writing that I'm it would have deeply enjoyed. So… Just one minute, that's all it takes. Just a few gentle taps of the fingers on your keyboard, a few seconds or so of your time, and your words can SAVE a writer from a dark demise. Do me a favor: Go find a story, ANY story, anywhere here on Fanfic,net, and see if you can help it. If it has very little / no reviews at all, just check it out, and say whatever comes to mind. And enjoy the thought in mind that you could have just SAVED that story, with just a few taps of the keyboard… If you agree with what I have said then please copy and paste any part of this story you wish onto your profile. A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit She ended up staying longer than As she walked along under the tall elm When she reached the alley, which was a However, halfway down the alley she She became uneasy and began to pray, Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness When she reached the end of the alley, The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and Thanking the Lord for her safety and to She felt she could recognize the man, so The police asked her if she would be She agreed and immediately pointed out When the man was told he had been The officer thanked Diane for her bravery She asked if they would ask the man one Diane was curious as to why he had not When the policeman asked him, he Amazingly, whether you believe it or not, Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! Did you know that 98 teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it? IMPORTANT THINGS MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME! 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. 7. My mother taught me IRONY. 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. 15. My mother taught me about ENVY. 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. 19. My mother taught me ESP. 20. My mother taught me HUMOR. 21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. 22. My mother taught me GENETICS. 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. 24. My mother taught me WISDOM. 25. And my favourite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. GURLZ ROOL! ROK! EVERYTHING NYCE! : {) This is Mr Moustachio. Mr Moustachio feeds of reviews. SO REVIEW! ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ And this is BEAR-BEAR. Copy BEAR-BEAR too! I DON'T OWN ANY BOOK SERIES WITH A DOCUMENT AND SIGNATURE. I OWN THEM WITH MY HEART. That was looooooooooooooooong. Did you read it all? You get this cookie only if you did. (:) (:.) (,;) | |||||||
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