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Joined 03-21-21, id: 14856894
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Accidental Apotheosis by Saphroneth reviews
Ash Ketchum was most of the way through his Johto Pokemon Journey when he tried out a magic potion intended to let him understand Pokemon better. It certainly did that. Now in a new body as a Pokemon that nobody can quite recognize, Ash is going to work out how to carry things and then continue his journey to be a Pokemon Master. There should probably be more steps there.
Pokémon - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Spiritual - Chapters: 148 - Words: 369,824 - Reviews: 1354 - Favs: 1,439 - Follows: 1,477 - Updated: 6/20 - Published: 12/22/2022 - Ash K./Satoshi, Arceus
Leopard's Choice by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU, gen, sequel to Wolf's Choice. Harry enters his fifth year with the Ministry demanding he retract his stories of Voldemort's return, his allies demanding sacrifices he may not want to make, and the world becoming sharper with every breath.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 57 - Words: 182,538 - Reviews: 390 - Favs: 703 - Follows: 993 - Updated: 6/19 - Published: 7/13/2020 - Harry P., Sirius B., Severus S., Theodore N.
Harry Potter and the Prince of Slytherin by The Sinister Man reviews
Harry Potter was Sorted into Slytherin after a crappy childhood. His brother Jim is believed to be the BWL. Think you know this story? Think again. Year Four starts on 9/1/20. NO romantic pairings prior to Fourth Year. Basically good Dumbledore and Weasleys. Limited bashing (mainly of James).
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 168 - Words: 1,472,152 - Reviews: 19948 - Favs: 20,828 - Follows: 22,500 - Updated: 6/12 - Published: 4/17/2015 - Harry P., Hermione G., Neville L., Theodore N.
Feather and Glass by Lomonaaeren reviews
HPBZ, AU. Harry isn't the Boy-Who-Lived, just a lonely orphan who goes to Hogwarts interested in making friends. But Harry can make few friends when he has to conceal his snake familiar and his Parseltongue—and that he seems capable of bringing small animal constructs to life. Blaise Zabini is one of the few people invited into Harry's secrets.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 123,807 - Reviews: 286 - Favs: 925 - Follows: 1,103 - Updated: 6/10 - Published: 8/5/2022 - [Blaise Z., Harry P.] Severus S., Padma P.
Deadly Belladonna by AppoApples reviews
Harry was rather content with his life, but when his lover, Andromeda finds a way to rewrite the war, well, let's just say that the Dark Lord was not expecting to deal with two Harry Potter's and the loss of his favourite lieutenant. Sirius Black might not be the only Black with a cleared name and dark past. Yet for younger Harry, the future has never been brighter. Slow updates.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 22 - Words: 82,321 - Reviews: 1654 - Favs: 4,104 - Follows: 5,233 - Updated: 5/27 - Published: 1/12/2021 - [Harry P., Bellatrix L.] Luna L., Newt S.
Harry Potter and the Weasley Seer by Sarcasm Dragon reviews
A prank in Professor Trelawney's class leads to Ron being hailed as a seer. But nobody could predict how that would change Harry's fate. AU, starts 3rd year. Powerful!Harry. Adventure/Humor. [Complete]
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 43 - Words: 140,101 - Reviews: 1015 - Favs: 2,693 - Follows: 2,738 - Updated: 5/26 - Published: 2/24/2012 - Harry P., Ron W., Albus D., Sybill T. - Complete
The Guise of Loyalty by berkeleyjake reviews
[Sequel to The Guise of Family] - Following the death of the King, Harry returns to Hogwarts as the new Guardian still sleeps below. While shadows of the past stalk Harry and his sister; they will delve into the secrets of warding, dark creatures, and ritual magic. New teachers arrive at Hogwarts in preparation for a gathering of epic proportions.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 27 - Words: 196,186 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 536 - Follows: 713 - Updated: 4/25 - Published: 11/27/2022 - Harry P., OC, Arcturus B., Newt S.
Pride & Humility by AppoApples reviews
Auror Draco Malfoy's ongoing rivalry with Potter has not ended in the decade or more since the end of the war. It isn't until an accident of time travel, does Draco realise how cursed Potter's life has been. Hopefully, a Death Eater kidnapping the Boy Who Lived won't cause too many problems. Or, perhaps, hopefully, it will. No Paradox, Time Travel!
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 15,473 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 177 - Follows: 297 - Updated: 2/28 - Published: 8/9/2023 - Harry P., Draco M., Severus S., Theodore N.
But He Didn't Want the Moon by theowritesstories reviews
A long-form Marauder fic about Remus Lupin and the first girl he ever loved, set against the backdrop of the First Wizarding War. Marauders Era, post-Hogwarts with the first Order of the Phoenix. Based on and (mostly) following the events of canon. RemusLupin/EmmelineVance SiriusBlack/MarleneMcKinnon JamesPotter/LilyEvans.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 64 - Words: 184,547 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 192 - Follows: 209 - Updated: 12/27/2023 - Published: 3/26/2018 - [Remus L., Emmeline V.] [Marlene M., Sirius B.]
Harry the Hufflepuff 5 by BajaB reviews
Lazy!Harry is back, although he has lost his way a bit.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 16,912 - Reviews: 354 - Favs: 1,070 - Follows: 1,405 - Updated: 12/23/2023 - Published: 7/14/2021
I See No Difference by maschl reviews
With Professor Snape's hateful and cruel words towards her, Hermione's trust in authority figures comes crashing down for good. She begins to question the adults' response to Harry's forced entry into the Triwizard Tournament and concludes that it's up to her to keep him safe. And if they have to leave the country to escape the madness of Hogwarts and Magical Britain, so be it.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 92,559 - Reviews: 1047 - Favs: 3,067 - Follows: 4,816 - Updated: 12/16/2023 - Published: 10/17/2020 - [Hermione G., Harry P.]
Proud Parents by RobSt reviews
Despite how impossible it seemed, Harry was sure his dad had saved the three of them from the dementors. After Hermione's time turner took them both back three hours, he was desperate to discover if who he'd seen casting that patronus was truly his dad. Harry certainly wasn't disappointed when his mum turned up instead, and changed the entire course of his life. Harry/Hermione
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 37 - Words: 259,899 - Reviews: 6590 - Favs: 8,444 - Follows: 11,021 - Updated: 11/10/2023 - Published: 3/25/2018 - [Hermione G., Harry P.]
Horcrux by LienaSha reviews
The summer before 5th year, Dudley Dursley successfully kept his cousin's wand from him. He was subsequently Kissed. As was Harry Potter, leaving a horcrux in possession of his body.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 76 - Words: 235,346 - Reviews: 402 - Favs: 499 - Follows: 570 - Updated: 9/28/2023 - Published: 6/8/2021 - Hermione G., Ginny W., Luna L., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Storybook Hero by dogbertcarroll reviews
Harry is sure he's living in a fairy tale with himself as the hero. Really, what else makes sense?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 23,435 - Reviews: 1619 - Favs: 4,695 - Follows: 5,151 - Updated: 8/6/2023 - Published: 11/30/2011 - Harry P.
Twisted Mirror by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU, HP/HP. Devastated in the aftermath of Sirius's death, Harry goes to the Room of Requirement and asks for someone who will understand him. Why he then gets delivered a copy of his alternate dimension, much scarier self will remain a mystery.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 9 - Words: 36,406 - Reviews: 91 - Favs: 511 - Follows: 521 - Updated: 7/20/2023 - Published: 6/22/2022 - Harry P.
A MODern Man by dogbertcarroll reviews
Harry takes advice he shouldn't, to do something he really should have known better than to try. Still, all's well that ends well, right?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 29 - Words: 71,209 - Reviews: 1294 - Favs: 3,389 - Follows: 3,887 - Updated: 7/14/2023 - Published: 3/16/2014 - Harry P.
That Glorious Strength by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU, gen. Instead of becoming Voldemort, Tom Riddle established a school of "secondary importance" for Muggleborns, half-bloods, and Squibs. Since the school frees Hogwarts to continue drifting more towards the purebloods' whims, they haven't raised any large fuss. Besides, everyone knows that half-bloods and Muggleborns don't have any real power...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 43 - Words: 202,060 - Reviews: 1553 - Favs: 3,015 - Follows: 4,001 - Updated: 4/16/2023 - Published: 9/6/2020 - Harry P., Hermione G., Lucius M., Tom R. Jr.
The Grim of Azkaban by berkeleyjake reviews
Sirius grinned as he was thrown into the black spindling tower of Azkaban, and looked upon the rows of empty cells that would soon be filled with Death Eaters. He still wanted revenge for the Potter family. Peter's death wasn't enough, it was hollow. He wanted all the Death Eaters dead. He would use this time in Azkaban well.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Crime/Tragedy - Chapters: 20 - Words: 47,111 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 450 - Follows: 601 - Updated: 12/13/2022 - Published: 6/13/2022 - Sirius B., OC
Harry the Foul by BolshevikMuppet99 reviews
After an aborted, poorly planned attempt at running away from the Dursleys, six-year old Harry is found and taken in by the last person anyone would expect. Crackish
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 9,521 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 158 - Follows: 206 - Updated: 11/30/2022 - Published: 7/25/2022 - Harry P., Severus S., Albus D., Herpo the Foul
The Guise of Family by berkeleyjake reviews
Thrown out of the Dursleys before his 11th birthday and sent off to places unknown, Harry's journey leads him astray from the path we know and towards learning archaic magics, bonding with strange creatures, and gaining a little sister with a new family. When his past comes looking for him, he will need new allies as he sets out on a hunt for a tyrant. (very slow build/burn)
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 105 - Words: 793,949 - Reviews: 638 - Favs: 1,914 - Follows: 1,913 - Updated: 11/27/2022 - Published: 3/25/2021 - Harry P., OC, Arcturus B., Newt S. - Complete
Lord Voldemort's Life Consists of What? by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU. Even if Voldemort is keeping his presence secret from the British Ministry, it's known to Dark-aligned groups on the Continent. Voldemort receives a letter from a powerful vampire lord offering a political and personal alliance, by having Voldemort's "heir and Horcrux" betrothed to the vampire lord's grandson. Voldemort has no idea what he's talking about, but he will find out.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 18,632 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 319 - Follows: 358 - Updated: 11/14/2022 - Published: 7/14/2022 - Harry P., Voldemort, Nagini
The Task of Being Emerald by Lomonaaeren reviews
Harry/Salazar. After the Battle of Hogwarts, the school isn't healing well. Harry, having been told by Dumbledore's portrait of a ritual that might summon a Founder back and repair the physical and mental cracks, undertakes it. Dumbledore believes he might summon Godric Gryffindor. Harry, deep in his bones, knows better.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Fantasy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 9,490 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 508 - Follows: 364 - Updated: 11/9/2022 - Published: 7/9/2022 - [Harry P., Salazar S.]
The Creature That Crawled Chaotically Out of Space by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU of HBP, Cthulhu mythos influence. Turns out there are worse things than Voldemort. Like what Harry summons to defeat him. And what Harry becomes in the process of defeating him. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,290 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 178 - Follows: 86 - Published: 10/31/2022 - Harry P., Severus S., Voldemort, Albus D. - Complete
Coping with Consequences by ulktante reviews
Sometimes people take actions or do things because they are unaware of the possible consequences. Sometimes they do because of those possible consequences. Sometimes even despite the possible consequences. But all of the time if they don't want to run forever they have to cope with those consequences. Started during NaNoWriMo2019 read "One Night Stand" first.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Family - Chapters: 42 - Words: 181,369 - Reviews: 428 - Favs: 610 - Follows: 675 - Updated: 8/12/2022 - Published: 4/18/2020 - [Lily Evans P., Tom R. Jr.] Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
Music Beneath the Mountains by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU. Little Harry Potter wanders away from the Dursleys one day and is found by a goblin on a mission from Gringotts. Harry grows up in the goblin deeps. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 36 - Words: 183,994 - Reviews: 1661 - Favs: 4,645 - Follows: 4,141 - Updated: 7/30/2022 - Published: 12/4/2018 - Harry P. - Complete
Lawful Evil by Lomonaaeren reviews
Harry/Horcrux, HPLV, AU. After Voldemort possesses Harry in the Department of Mysteries, the Horcrux in Harry's head awakens. While it's grown closer to Harry over the years that it shared his soul, it's still a piece of Voldemort. And this piece of Voldemort doesn't see any reason it shouldn't have everything it wants: Harry seduced the Dark side and under its control. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,248 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 280 - Follows: 134 - Published: 7/20/2022 - [Harry P., Voldemort] - Complete
Sleeping Dogs Lie by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU, HPDM. Harry has received comment after comment on his mother's eyes during his first year at Hogwarts, but almost no one tells him he looks like his dad. When he opens the photo album Hagrid gives him at the end of the year and sees a man who looks like him standing with his parents in one picture—a man named Sirius Black—he begins to understand why. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 6 - Words: 30,722 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 498 - Follows: 317 - Updated: 7/15/2022 - Published: 7/10/2022 - [Harry P., Draco M.] Sirius B., Narcissa M. - Complete
Seventh Horcrux by Emerald Ashes reviews
The presence of a foreign soul may have unexpected side effects on a growing child. I am Lord Volde...Harry Potter. I'm Harry Potter. In which Harry is insane, Hermione is a Dark Lady-in-training, Ginny is a minion, and Ron is confused.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 22 - Words: 104,285 - Reviews: 2082 - Favs: 12,223 - Follows: 5,906 - Updated: 7/12/2022 - Published: 9/7/2014 - Harry P. - Complete
Retreat by Lomonaaeren reviews
HPLV, AU after HBP. Harry didn't understand why Voldemort had suggested their marriage as a solution to the war. He didn't understand why his friends were supporting the suggestion. But he goes into it, trying to be as numb as possible, trying to retreat into his mind and just let the world play out around him—no matter how difficult that is.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 17 - Words: 84,574 - Reviews: 195 - Favs: 1,180 - Follows: 829 - Updated: 7/8/2022 - Published: 11/4/2020 - [Voldemort, Harry P.]
Stronger Than Sunlight by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU. Everything goes smoothly with Harry's Hogwarts letter, enough that Dumbledore never needed to send Hagrid to escort Harry to Diagon Alley. But things stutter to a halt for several observers when Harry arrives at Hogwarts for his Sorting.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,165 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 424 - Follows: 226 - Published: 6/21/2022 - Harry P., Severus S., Albus D., Minerva M. - Complete
Who Dares Wins by OlegGunnarsson reviews
A Harry Potter who grew up studying military tactics and strategy uses the attack on the Ministry as an opportunity to lay an ambush of his own - only to learn that his parents are still alive, as well as a twin brother whom Dumbledore calls the true boy-who-lived. And then, things get complicated. Military!Harry. A subversion of DZ2's Prodigal Son Challenge.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 32 - Words: 183,705 - Reviews: 3270 - Favs: 9,900 - Follows: 12,616 - Updated: 4/25/2022 - Published: 1/19/2019 - [Harry P., Susan B.] OC
Ignore the Dementor by NinjaPandaScholar reviews
"Ignore the dementor; really, it's fine. There are no monsters here. It's just me…Harry." When things go very wrong before his fifth year, Harry Potter tries to pretend everything is normal…while also taking care of his Harry-suit so that it stays healthy and alive and learning to reign in his new powers, yeah everything is definitely normal. Creature!Fic
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Horror/Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 133,619 - Reviews: 447 - Favs: 2,137 - Follows: 1,410 - Updated: 3/10/2022 - Published: 7/5/2021 - [Harry P., Luna L.] - Complete
Back to Black by Speaker-to-Customers reviews
The Cursed Child's messing with time sends 17-year-old, sane, Bellatrix Black six years forward in time and gives her a glimpse into her future. Naturally she's not keen on that fate and decides to avert it by becoming an Auror instead of a Death Eater. When Harry enters the Wizarding World he'll find some things significantly different from the original time-line...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 41,686 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 352 - Follows: 570 - Updated: 2/23/2022 - Published: 6/1/2019 - Harry P., Severus S., Bellatrix L., N. Tonks
Kairos Amid the Ruins by Lomonaaeren reviews
Harry's attempt to time travel and fix the past went badly awry. Time shattered, and the various pieces of the universe clung to each other as best they could. Harry finds himself in 1961, with Albus Dumbledore the Minister for Magic, Gellert Grindelwald his loving husband, Voldemort newly defeated…and Severus Snape being proclaimed the Boy-Who-Lived. HPOB, ADGG. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 37 - Words: 118,469 - Reviews: 616 - Favs: 988 - Follows: 1,016 - Updated: 1/29/2022 - Published: 10/3/2019 - [Harry P., Orion B.] Severus S., Albus D. - Complete
The Crack Pot by maschl reviews
My collection of silly HP one-shots. Mostly HHr. Now with Chapter 5: "Do You Know Who?": During their first meeting, Hagrid didn't want to speak of the past and only told Harry that he's famous because of "you know who". But Harry doesn't know who. During his first trip on the Hogwarts Express, he tries to find out more. This turns out to be much more difficult than expected.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 9,154 - Reviews: 136 - Favs: 318 - Follows: 233 - Updated: 1/22/2022 - Published: 12/8/2019 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Harry Potter, et al, and the Keystone Council by OlegGunnarsson reviews
All his life, Harry Potter had heard voices inside his head. He never expected to learn that the voices were his own. Five different Harry Potters, from five different worlds, must work together to survive life, school, and the second war.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 59 - Words: 221,546 - Reviews: 1155 - Favs: 2,116 - Follows: 2,752 - Updated: 11/30/2021 - Published: 6/23/2018 - Harry P.
Mirror of a Thousand Shadows by Lomonaaeren reviews
Pre-HPTMR, GWBL. AU. When the Dark Lady Firebrand tried to kill Harry Potter, she didn't manage it. Harry survives, goes to Hogwarts, and befriends Ron Weasley despite being Sorted into Slytherin. Ron's younger brother Tom starts at Hogwarts the next year, in possession of a mysterious diary from which a sixteen-year-old witch who calls herself Ginny speaks... COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 25,134 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 11/30/2021 - Published: 11/27/2021 - [Ginny W., Bellatrix L.] Harry P., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
The Answer Is Silence by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU, implied time travel. Lord Voldemort might have been the first to know it, but others learned, including the Dursleys, the Hogwarts professors and students, and the Death Eaters: Harry Potter is terrifying. Seven parts. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 42,192 - Reviews: 416 - Favs: 2,990 - Follows: 1,421 - Updated: 11/9/2021 - Published: 11/3/2021 - Harry P. - Complete
A Black Hound at Death's Right Hand by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU. Harry knew that the Dursleys was wrong about magic not being real, because of the ghostly man who would visit him every time the moon was full. However, it took growing older to learn about what Harry had to do to get his godfather, whom he had fallen in love with, back among the living. Based extremely loosely on the fairy tale "Godfather Death." COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 14,960 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 252 - Follows: 152 - Updated: 11/1/2021 - Published: 10/31/2021 - [Harry P., Sirius B.] Luna L., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Cold blood by DerLaCroix reviews
Sometimes, the tide of events really changes a person.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 234,393 - Reviews: 4042 - Favs: 10,114 - Follows: 7,634 - Updated: 9/12/2021 - Published: 3/2/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Harry Is A Dragon, And That's Okay by Saphroneth reviews
Harry Potter is a dragon. He's been a dragon for several years, and frankly he's quite used to the idea - after all, in his experience nobody ever comments about it, so presumably it's just what happens sometimes. Magic, though, THAT is something entirely new. Comedy fic, leading on from the consequences of one... admittedly quite large... change. Cover art by amalgamzaku.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 102 - Words: 735,308 - Reviews: 3880 - Favs: 6,819 - Follows: 6,119 - Updated: 7/4/2021 - Published: 3/10/2019 - Harry P. - Complete
Courage Is by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU. In the chaos after Sirius is taken to Azkaban, Peter Pettigrew tracks down Harry Potter and snatches the child from the Dursleys' home. He tells himself that he's raising Harry so that the Dark Lord may have the honor of killing him when he comes back. So he tells himself. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 33,891 - Reviews: 142 - Favs: 390 - Follows: 239 - Updated: 6/30/2021 - Published: 6/25/2021 - Harry P., Sirius B., Peter P. - Complete
An Altar to an Unknown God by Lomonaaeren reviews
Harry/several pairings. Harry, restless and dissatisfied with his life as he approaches the end of his eighth year, hears of an altar in the Forbidden Forest that can show him several glimpses of possible futures. He can't resist approaching it. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,174 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 202 - Follows: 116 - Published: 6/23/2021 - Complete
Boggarts and monsters by The madness in me reviews
Remus thought teaching his students to fight boggarts would be a great idea, that is until the older muggle born students got their shot and the unfortunate werewolf suddenly got a crash course in muggle movie monsters.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 30 - Words: 21,175 - Reviews: 1123 - Favs: 2,054 - Follows: 1,864 - Updated: 5/23/2021 - Published: 9/23/2017 - Remus L.
Eyes in the Cupboard by berkeleyjake reviews
Dudley Dursley is the perfect child of a perfect family. Nothing like his mum's sister and her son, Harry. Everything is normal. Until it isn't. Strange things begin to happen around Dudley and he gets blamed for them. He's nothing like Harry, so he makes sure he is always in his cupboard, but strange things still keep happening.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Mystery/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,456 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 29 - Published: 3/8/2021 - Petunia D., Dudley D. - Complete
Princeps by Lomonaaeren reviews
Gen, AU. Harry has worked for years as an Unspeakable to identify the best point where he might go back in time to change the impact of Voldemort's war. Now he knows: he will have to return to his parents' Hogwarts years and encourage the Slytherins to stand on their own instead of following a leader. Surely nothing can go too wrong. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 77,337 - Reviews: 571 - Favs: 2,635 - Follows: 1,384 - Updated: 12/17/2020 - Published: 11/22/2019 - Harry P., Severus S., Regulus B. - Complete
Harry Potter's New Mother by FestiveBoi reviews
By some twist of fate, the Hungarian Horntail takes an interest in Harry Potter, and thus, it decides to become his new mother, after hearing how badly he was treated at the Dursley's and also at Hogwarts. Nothing will ever make him feel unwelcomed or unwanted again. Not on her scales, and she would make sure of it! [Mother-Son Relationship between Harry and the Hungarian Horntail]
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 34,146 - Reviews: 130 - Favs: 1,038 - Follows: 865 - Updated: 11/23/2020 - Published: 10/12/2020 - Harry P. - Complete
101 ways by The madness in me reviews
101 ways to weaponize potions previously thought to be harmless. As discovered by Neville Longbottom and compiled by Severus Snape.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,486 - Reviews: 180 - Favs: 664 - Follows: 630 - Updated: 11/2/2020 - Published: 2/2/2020 - Severus S., Neville L.
Too Many Champions by maschl reviews
Harry and Hermione decide to help Fred and George to enter their names into the Goblet of Fire. Then, they enter some more names. Chaos ensues... A story that combines humour, logic, canon concepts, and some unique plot bunnies into a 4th-year tale that's hopefully different. COMPLETE
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 82,506 - Reviews: 946 - Favs: 4,044 - Follows: 2,423 - Updated: 10/17/2020 - Published: 1/24/2020 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] - Complete
What's In A Name? by Speaker-to-Customers reviews
Silly drabble. In one universe Harry gave his second son a different set of names...
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 205 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 7/27/2020 - Published: 6/30/2020 - Harry P., Ginny W., Albus S. P. - Complete
Wolf's Choice by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU of GoF, sequel to Other People's Choices. Harry begins his summer with horrific visions that come true much faster than he was expecting. He'll have to rely on his circle of friends, both his guardians, and all his allies to cope with the results. COMPLETE. The sequel, Leopard's Choice, is now up.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Adventure - Chapters: 60 - Words: 194,304 - Reviews: 1266 - Favs: 1,682 - Follows: 1,949 - Updated: 7/6/2020 - Published: 7/23/2018 - Harry P., Severus S., Blaise Z., Theodore N. - Complete
Forget-Me-Not by Lomonaaeren reviews
HPTN, AU. Harry isn't the Boy-Who-Lived, but his parents still died, and Albus, concerned that Death Eaters might find him, cast a powerful charm on him to make wizards ignore him. Except, with the Elder Wand in play, the charm was too powerful, and made people forget about Harry when not directly interacting with him. Harry is content...until the charm breaks. 7 parts. COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 53,159 - Reviews: 289 - Favs: 1,746 - Follows: 805 - Updated: 7/2/2020 - Published: 6/26/2020 - [Harry P., Theodore N.] Remus L., Neville L. - Complete
Dear Professor Lupin by A Bean reviews
It comes to the attention of the students of Hogwarts that their favorite werewolf is in need of a boost of self-esteem after he receives an unfriendly Howler at breakfast one morning.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,387 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 17 - Published: 6/11/2020 - Harry P., Remus L. - Complete
Luna Lovegood and the Dark Lord's Diary by The madness in me reviews
Tom Riddle's plans fall through when Ginny Weasley loses his diary shortly after starting her first year and it is found by one Luna Lovegood. A series of bizarre conversations follow. Luna? - Yes Tom? - I've been giving this a lot of thought...and I believe you may be insane. (Not crack. Plot takes a while to appear but it's there) See last chapter for fan art and translations.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 101 - Words: 72,373 - Reviews: 4507 - Favs: 5,284 - Follows: 4,117 - Updated: 5/27/2020 - Published: 3/16/2017 - Luna L., Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Secret potions club by The madness in me reviews
Side story to Luna Lovegood and the Dark Lords Diary. Snape starts a secret potions club with himself, Luna Lovegood and the Weasley twins. Chaos Ensues.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,006 - Reviews: 242 - Favs: 678 - Follows: 713 - Updated: 2/1/2020 - Published: 5/4/2018 - Severus S., George W., Luna L., Fred W.
Itachi, Is That A Baby? by SpoonandJohn reviews
Petunia performs a bit of accidental magic. It says something about her parenting that Uchiha Itachi is considered a better prospect for raising a child. Young Hari is raised by one of the most infamous nukenin of all time and a cadre of "Uncles" whose cumulative effect is very . . . prominent. And someone had the bright idea to bring him back to England. Merlin help them all.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 102 - Words: 314,960 - Reviews: 8327 - Favs: 12,934 - Follows: 13,123 - Updated: 1/21/2020 - Published: 11/25/2015 - Harry P., Albus D., Itachi U.
Saved By The Boggart by Right What Is Wrong reviews
[AU] Boggarts behave a little differently than in canon, and matters go south very quickly for a certain treacherous rodent. [Oneshot.]
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 741 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 270 - Follows: 91 - Published: 12/4/2019 - Sirius B., Remus L., Peter P. - Complete
Harry The HufflePuff 4 by BajaB reviews
Not going to school would have been way too much effort, and besides, Harry had promised that since last year was a bit boring, he was going to not try to avoid everything this year..
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 26,753 - Reviews: 765 - Favs: 3,708 - Follows: 3,830 - Updated: 10/14/2019 - Published: 3/10/2018 - Complete
Dementors are born freezing by The madness in me reviews
Dementors are born freezing. From the moment they enter the world in some twisted form of infancy they are cold.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,070 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 31 - Published: 10/10/2019 - Luna L. - Complete
Benefits of old laws by ulktante reviews
Parts of souls do not go on alone. When Voldemort returns to a body he is much more sane than before and realizes that he cannot go on as he started. Finding some old laws he sets out to reach his goals in another way. Harry will find his world turned upside down once more and we will see how people react when the evil is not acting how they think it should.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 109 - Words: 878,803 - Reviews: 6682 - Favs: 7,533 - Follows: 6,862 - Updated: 10/3/2019 - Published: 10/3/2015 - Harry P., Severus S., Voldemort - Complete
Harry Potter and the Dogfather II: Chamber of Secrets (ON HIATUS) by LadyClassical reviews
Harry learns before second year that he can speak Parseltongue and he has a rather disturbing inkling of why; Regulus remembers how much family means to him; Sirius enters fatherhood, trying to leave his demons behind him. But when horror, pain, and crushing loss threaten it all, they learn that leaving the past where it belongs is not so easy. (year 2 AU, Draco and Lucius bashing)
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Family - Chapters: 58 - Words: 188,487 - Reviews: 468 - Favs: 571 - Follows: 864 - Updated: 9/30/2019 - Published: 2/8/2018 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] Sirius B., Regulus B.
Again and Again by AtherisHiss reviews
The Do-Over Fic - a chance to do things again, but this time-To Get it Right. But is it really such a blessing as it appears? A jaded, darker, bitter, and tired wizard who just wants to die; but can't. A chance to learn how to live, from the most unexpected source. slytherin!harry, dark!harry, eventual slash, lv/hp
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Supernatural - Chapters: 44 - Words: 335,972 - Reviews: 6308 - Favs: 14,014 - Follows: 13,470 - Updated: 10/7/2018 - Published: 5/25/2012 - Harry P., Voldemort, Tom R. Jr.
Blindness by AngelaStarCat reviews
Harry Potter is not standing up in his crib when the Killing Curse strikes him, and the cursed scar has far more terrible consequences. But some souls will not be broken by horrible circumstance. Some people won't let the world drag them down. Strong men rise from such beginnings, and powerful gifts can be gained in terrible curses. (HP/HG, Scientist!Harry)
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 38 - Words: 324,281 - Reviews: 6118 - Favs: 19,884 - Follows: 16,638 - Updated: 9/25/2018 - Published: 1/1/2015 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Other People's Choices by Lomonaaeren reviews
AU. The Sorting Hat doesn't just let the Sword go when it falls on Harry's head in the Chamber, but also Sorts him again, this time into Slytherin. Harry is furious and terrified, and the adults aren't helping much. COMPLETE, sequel to come.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 61 - Words: 191,253 - Reviews: 2702 - Favs: 4,748 - Follows: 4,207 - Updated: 7/23/2018 - Published: 12/12/2016 - Harry P., Severus S., Sorting Hat - Complete
One Night Stand by ulktante reviews
Two people struck with frustration search out a way to relax. All starts from there. This is a sketch of a beginning to a story. It's finished and intended to spark your imagination! AU James Potter is not Harry's father Links to stories inspired by this one in my profile!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,494 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 349 - Follows: 303 - Updated: 3/30/2018 - Published: 3/29/2018 - [Lily Evans P., Voldemort] Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Harry the Hufflepuff by BajaB reviews
Luckily, lazy came up in Petunia's tirades slightly more often than freak, otherwise, this could have been a very different story. AU. Not your usual Hufflepuff!Harry story.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 29,190 - Reviews: 1666 - Favs: 10,834 - Follows: 3,922 - Updated: 3/12/2018 - Published: 11/10/2010 - Harry P. - Complete
Harry the Hufflepuff 3 - Harry's Year off by BajaB reviews
Sequel - Read the others first, of course. Lazy!harry is back for another year of doing nothing. This will not be a long story. Sorry for the wait.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 23,981 - Reviews: 756 - Favs: 4,249 - Follows: 1,922 - Updated: 3/10/2018 - Published: 11/23/2014 - Complete
Harry Potter and the Dogfather by LadyClassical reviews
What if Sirius rescued Harry before Hogwarts and took him under his wing? What if Sirius taught Care of Magical Creatures and ended up starting a Defense Against the Dark Arts club? What if Hermione chose Harry? What if Sirius reunited with someone special he thought was gone forever...and they got a second chance? Read on to find out! (Harry POV, year 1 AU, slight Dumblebashing)
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Family - Chapters: 75 - Words: 168,128 - Reviews: 785 - Favs: 1,745 - Follows: 1,442 - Updated: 2/9/2018 - Published: 6/29/2017 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] Sirius B. - Complete
Onward and Upwards by MarieKavanagh reviews
Jack and Rose both believing the other to be dead, are overjoyed to be reunited on the Carpathia and begin their new life together. Where will their life take them? What adventures lie in store? And are they truly out of danger?
Titanic - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 40 - Words: 97,415 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 134 - Follows: 111 - Updated: 1/14/2018 - Published: 5/18/2016 - Rose D., Jack D.
Whelped by Casscade reviews
Professor Snape is tasked with delivering the letter to the boy nobody has set eyes on in ten years... Horror Oneshot: Pretty messed up.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,733 - Reviews: 113 - Favs: 491 - Follows: 176 - Published: 10/18/2017 - Complete
What If by Fyreheart reviews
This is a series of one-shot stories and miscellaneous scenes about what if Harry had responded differently to key events in his life.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 14 - Words: 47,732 - Reviews: 1450 - Favs: 3,318 - Follows: 2,815 - Updated: 8/21/2017 - Published: 5/25/2015 - Harry P.
Trolling the Toad by Akela Victoire reviews
If his life at Hogwarts was going to be a living hell, then so was hers. She wouldn't know what hit her.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 53 - Words: 86,140 - Reviews: 923 - Favs: 2,265 - Follows: 1,854 - Updated: 8/11/2017 - Published: 8/12/2016 - Harry P., Dolores U. - Complete
The many Deaths of Harry Potter by ShayneT reviews
In a world with a pragmatic, intelligent Voldemort, Harry discovers that he has the power to live, die and repeat until he gets it right.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 78 - Words: 242,571 - Reviews: 4477 - Favs: 8,809 - Follows: 5,404 - Updated: 6/14/2017 - Published: 3/1/2017 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Mr Chicken and the Chamber of Secrets by Revliledpembroke reviews
Harry's looking for a place to teach the DA Defense. He needs someplace large, hidden, and it can only allow access to certain people. What better place than the Chamber of Secrets? Ron and Ginny do not agree with him.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,018 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 5 - Published: 5/21/2017
Amalgum – Lockhart's Folly by tkepner reviews
Death wants free of its Master and proposes sending Harry back in time to avoid the unnecessary deaths in fighting Voldemort. Harry readily accepts, thinking he'll start anew as a Firstie. Instead, Harry's soul, magic, and memories end up at the beginning of Second Year — in GILDEROY LOCKHART!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 31 - Words: 192,977 - Reviews: 2423 - Favs: 8,777 - Follows: 5,049 - Updated: 2/20/2017 - Published: 4/24/2016 - Harry P., Hermione G., Gilderoy L., Bellatrix L. - Complete
3 Slytherin Marauders by severusphoenix reviews
Harry & Dudley flee an abusive Vernon to Severus Snape. Severus finds a new home for himself & the boys with dragons and hunt the Horcruxes from there. The dragons, especially one become their allies. Tom R is VERY different.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 144 - Words: 582,712 - Reviews: 6811 - Favs: 5,840 - Follows: 4,291 - Updated: 7/31/2016 - Published: 3/14/2009 - Harry P., Severus S. - Complete
What It Takes by Aimless Gallifreyan reviews
She can accept the fate of losing her partner in crime and time in order to save everyone she knows and the town she grew up in. She can screw fate and be with her bluenette lover at the cost of losing everything she had in Arcadia Bay. Or...she can make a risky, stupid gamble just to save both at once...and maybe more. (AU, Pricefield and possibly others too, Rated M for Language)
Life is Strange - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 13,996 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 6/28/2016 - Published: 11/10/2015
The Handbook of Elf Psychology by evansentranced reviews
Sequel to Fantastic Elves and Where to Find Them! Harry is captured by wizards and brought to a castle. The wizards are obnoxious, but there's a lovely wood nearby which is quaintly named the "Forbidden" Forest. Harry thinks that's adorable.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 99,261 - Reviews: 2713 - Favs: 7,457 - Follows: 6,796 - Updated: 6/21/2016 - Published: 9/8/2012 - Harry P., Draco M., Severus S., Luna L. - Complete
Severus Snape and the Toddler-Who-Lived by nicnac918 reviews
No, Dumbledore did not use a picture of Severus Snape to teach little two year old Harry to call the man 'Da.' That is a ridiculous accusation and it will not be stood for!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,278 - Reviews: 248 - Favs: 2,267 - Follows: 581 - Published: 4/17/2016 - Harry P., Severus S., Albus D. - Complete
Magical Relations by evansentranced reviews
AU First Year onward: Harry's relatives were shocked when the Hogwarts letters came. Not because Harry got into Hogwarts. They had expected that. But Dudley, on the other hand...That had been a surprise. Currently in 5th year. *Reviews contain SPOILERS!*
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 71 - Words: 269,602 - Reviews: 6224 - Favs: 8,008 - Follows: 9,490 - Updated: 3/9/2016 - Published: 3/18/2007 - Harry P., Dudley D.
Harry Lovegood: Saves the Sorcerer's Stone by SovereignChild reviews
What if, while Hagrid was flying with little Harry on that fateful night, he dropped him? What if Harry Potter was spotted by one Estelle Lovegood while she was out stargazing, and saved just in time? How will Harry's life change, with two loving parents and a sister from a very 'different' family? How will his first year be now? Ravenclaw!Powerful!Happy!Harry, Dumbledore bashing
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,507 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 310 - Follows: 446 - Updated: 12/7/2015 - Published: 7/21/2013 - Harry P., Hermione G., Luna L., Xenophilius L.
Protector by Foxwithgrayeyes reviews
Dumbledore urges Snape to look after Harry after witnessing the Dursley's abuse and Snape reluctantly becomes parent figure to a very small Harry Potter. Please r&r! : Do it, you won't regret it. No slash. at all.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 35 - Words: 47,190 - Reviews: 1527 - Favs: 1,514 - Follows: 1,713 - Updated: 11/4/2015 - Published: 2/21/2011 - Severus S., Harry P.
Goblin Communications by afish.2far reviews
What if the goblins wrote to Harry on his eleventh birthday? Dursley treatment not physical abuse just neglect and completely uncaring about him - how would this change him? What would this mean for Hogwarts? Dumbles bashing. Goblins/ Lord Potter story.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Family - Chapters: 14 - Words: 29,823 - Reviews: 402 - Favs: 2,063 - Follows: 1,362 - Updated: 10/10/2015 - Published: 9/7/2015 - Harry P., F. Flitwick, Griphook - Complete
Potter Ever After by Kevin3 reviews
Between marriage contracts, soul bonds, angry fathers, wandering eyes, backstabbing women, and defiant house elves, Harry has a feeling that 'True Love' isn't in the cards for him in this story. Which is just fine by him, as it turns out. A depressing walkthrough of the current state of HP Fanfiction.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 19,696 - Reviews: 266 - Favs: 856 - Follows: 420 - Updated: 8/4/2015 - Published: 3/24/2015 - Harry P., Hermione G., Ginny W., Susan B. - Complete
Teenage Mutant Ninja Kneazles by Manatocfox reviews
Growing up as a Kneazle is tricky, especially when you realize you might be human, too. Add in posessed professors, sinister snakes, and more detentions than he can count, and Harry's Hogwarts career has certainly been memorable. What will he do when he faces his biggest challenge yet? Being a teenager isn't easy no matter what species you are. Sequel to 'Growing Up Kneazle'
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 155,973 - Reviews: 713 - Favs: 858 - Follows: 1,156 - Updated: 7/29/2015 - Published: 9/19/2012 - Harry P., Ginny W.
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Nope by Rachelfairynose reviews
One-shot. What a sarcastic, proactive and more confident Harry should have done when his name came out of that thrice damned Goblet. Strong language.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,231 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 6/21/2015 - Published: 6/20/2015 - Complete
A Crack Slash Epilogue by alexanderwales reviews
Six years after the events of Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality, Hogwarts is a changed place, and a long-ago prophecy has reared its head.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,037 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 56 - Published: 6/4/2015 - Complete
Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality by Less Wrong reviews
Petunia married a biochemist, and Harry grew up reading science and science fiction. Then came the Hogwarts letter, and a world of intriguing new possibilities to exploit. And new friends, like Hermione Granger, and Professor McGonagall, and Professor Quirrell... COMPLETE.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 122 - Words: 661,619 - Reviews: 37105 - Favs: 31,161 - Follows: 22,596 - Updated: 3/14/2015 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Redoing it Voldemort Style by severusphoenix reviews
Fanfiction has sent nearly everyone back to 'fix' things except for the Dark Lord. So this is very AU and the 'fates' or whoever decide that Tom should have a try at it. To Voldemort's dismay he must try to save both the wizarding world and the muggle one as well. Don't really know what pairings I'll try for this time, the characters will likely let me know.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,014 - Reviews: 155 - Favs: 184 - Follows: 284 - Published: 1/26/2015 - Albus D., Tom R. Jr.
Harry Potter and the Boy Who Lived by The Santi reviews
Harry Potter loves, and is loved by, his parents, his godfather, and his brother. He isn’t mistreated, abused, or neglected. So why is he a Dark Wizard? NonBWL!Harry. Not your typical Harry’s brother is the Boy Who Lived story.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 147,796 - Reviews: 4880 - Favs: 14,208 - Follows: 13,995 - Updated: 1/3/2015 - Published: 9/3/2009 - Harry P.
Harry's Wand Gets Around by Kevin3 reviews
Harry's Wand just can't seem to make up its mind on who it belongs to... resulting in a world where Gilderoy Lockhart stops Pomona Sprout from ruining Albus Dumbledore's chances of killing Lord Voldemort. Humor one-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,427 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 16 - Published: 10/3/2014
Constant Vigilance by Kevin3 reviews
What? Why was Amelia snickering? Surely it was a good thing to have such a legendary auror like Alastor Moody as a mentor... right?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,865 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 238 - Follows: 85 - Published: 10/3/2014
Harry Crow by RobSt reviews
What will happen when a goblin-raised Harry arrives at Hogwarts. A Harry who has received training, already knows the prophecy and has no scar. With the backing of the goblin nation and Hogwarts herself. Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 106 - Words: 737,006 - Reviews: 29835 - Favs: 33,278 - Follows: 20,321 - Updated: 6/8/2014 - Published: 6/5/2012 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] - Complete
Screw Them! by White Angel of Auralon reviews
Harry Potter had enough of the stupidity of the Wizarding World. If they all believed that he was a dark wizard, just because he could talk to snakes, screw them! He didn't need them. And who ever said that all prophecies did come true? (No horcruxes).
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 13,910 - Reviews: 655 - Favs: 7,706 - Follows: 2,585 - Published: 5/4/2014 - Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
Dobby the Almost No Longer Free Forest Elf by evansentranced reviews
Short companion piece for the Handbook. This was written for the Fandom For Leukemia & Lymphoma Society as part of last year's compilation. It's exactly what it says on the tin, set after Harry's freed Dobby and they're out roaming the countryside again, but before the events of third year.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,381 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 258 - Follows: 104 - Published: 4/27/2014 - Harry P., Dobby - Complete
Narration Irritation by Kevin3 reviews
This is it. The summer where Harry is no longer the world's pinata... the only problem is, the young man can't quite get what he's expecting from a young junior auror named Tonks. Parody/Romance/Humor.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,108 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 37 - Published: 4/17/2014 - [Harry P., N. Tonks] - Complete
Wait, What? by Publicola reviews
Points of divergence in the Harry Potter universe. Those moments where someone really ought to have taken a step back and asked, "Wait, what?" An ongoing collection of one-shots. Episode 16: Why I Like You.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 16 - Words: 31,551 - Reviews: 1447 - Favs: 2,165 - Follows: 1,956 - Updated: 4/6/2014 - Published: 7/9/2012 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G., Albus D.
Raised by Darkness by apple2011 reviews
After years of abuse by his uncle a seven year old Harry Potter is rescued from the Dursleys by a Dementor who senses his pain, Raised in Azkaban with a strange but caring family and new powers how will Harry react to the revelation he is famous, a wizard and has the power to speak to Dementors. Powerful Harry, manipulative Dumbledore, Weasley bashing and Caring Dementors.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 55 - Words: 120,493 - Reviews: 2166 - Favs: 5,604 - Follows: 3,657 - Updated: 8/10/2013 - Published: 9/30/2012 - Harry P. - Complete
Out of the Fire and into the Cupboard by HalfASlug reviews
There's a reason that adults don't usually play hide and seek - especially when they are nothing more than overgrown children.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,731 - Reviews: 236 - Favs: 1,742 - Follows: 359 - Published: 7/24/2013 - Harry P., Ron W., Hermione G., Ginny W. - Complete
Reunion by Rorschach's Blot reviews
It all starts with Hogwarts' Class Reunion.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 61,134 - Reviews: 2057 - Favs: 7,842 - Follows: 4,813 - Updated: 3/2/2013 - Published: 11/14/2008 - Complete
Allure Immune Harry by Racke reviews
Harry had no idea why the boys in the Great Hall drooled over themselves as the students from Beuxbatons made their entrance, but he knew better than to let an opportunity slip. He hurriedly stole Ron's sandwich. It tasted gloriously.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,628 - Reviews: 792 - Favs: 12,749 - Follows: 3,988 - Published: 12/29/2012 - Harry P., Fleur D. - Complete
Fantastic Elves and Where to Find Them by evansentranced reviews
After the Dursleys abandon six year old Harry in a park in Kent, Harry comes to the realization that he is an elf. Not a house elf, though. A forest elf. Never mind wizards vs muggles; Harry has his own thing going on. Character study, pre-Hogwarts, NOT a creature!fic, slightly cracky.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 38,289 - Reviews: 998 - Favs: 5,868 - Follows: 2,388 - Updated: 9/8/2012 - Published: 6/8/2012 - Harry P. - Complete
Stages of Hope by kayly silverstorm reviews
Professor Sirius Black, Head of Slytherin house, is confused. Who are these two strangers found at Hogwarts, and why does one of them claim to be the son of Lily Lupin and that git James Potter? Dimension travel AU, no pairings so far. Dark humour.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 32 - Words: 94,563 - Reviews: 4618 - Favs: 10,623 - Follows: 4,672 - Updated: 9/3/2012 - Published: 4/10/2011 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Growing Up Kneazle by Manatocfox reviews
On the cusp of Harry's third birthday an impressive display of accidental magic will change his life forever. When Harry is rediscovered nearly nine years later, what will become of our intrepid hero when he finally attends Hogwarts? Sequel now posted!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 40 - Words: 217,803 - Reviews: 1273 - Favs: 2,148 - Follows: 1,441 - Updated: 8/28/2012 - Published: 1/27/2011 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
My Nephew Harry 2: The Hogwarts Years by Lucillia reviews
After spending a few years in the care of his Aunt Marge, it is now time for a Harry to go to Hogwarts.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,231 - Reviews: 260 - Favs: 1,456 - Follows: 2,234 - Published: 8/25/2012 - Marge D., Harry P.
My Nephew Harry by Lucillia reviews
During the two months she had watched her eight year-old nephews, Marge Dursley discovered that Petunia was a pathological liar, Vernon had somehow been brainwashed by that no good b***h, Dudley was the spawn of Satan, and Harry was actually a good kid.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 15 - Words: 21,044 - Reviews: 1094 - Favs: 4,519 - Follows: 3,200 - Updated: 8/25/2012 - Published: 6/25/2009 - Marge D., Harry P. - Complete
Apprentic James by Lil Nezumi reviews
Char. Ooc, AU/AR, still within JK's world - Harry is apprenticed to a Diagon Alley businessman at the tender age of seven. From there the story changes... very mild bashing of some regulars.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 12 - Words: 42,445 - Reviews: 348 - Favs: 2,073 - Follows: 816 - Published: 7/5/2012 - Harry P., G. Ollivander - Complete
A Different Halloween by RobSt reviews
Could a chance meeting change history? What would a different Halloween in 1981 mean for wizarding Britain?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 20 - Words: 124,549 - Reviews: 4970 - Favs: 12,561 - Follows: 6,256 - Updated: 5/26/2012 - Published: 10/31/2010 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] - Complete
Death of an Evil One by Lady FoxFire reviews
How far would you go to save your way of life, your magic and your life and that of your people? - Warning - Character Death
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,154 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 330 - Follows: 102 - Published: 1/21/2012 - Complete
Lessons With Hagrid by NothingPretentious reviews
"Have you found out how to get past that beast of Hagrid's yet?" ...Snape kicks Harry out of 'Remedial Potions', but as we know from The Philosopher's Stone, there is another Occlumens in the school good enough to keep out the Dark Lord. Stupid oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,357 - Reviews: 741 - Favs: 5,203 - Follows: 1,220 - Published: 10/31/2011 - Rubeus H. - Complete
Harry the Hufflepuff 2 by BajaB reviews
Lazy!Harry is back, and not doing very much at all...
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 23,642 - Reviews: 1057 - Favs: 5,847 - Follows: 2,277 - Updated: 10/5/2011 - Published: 8/28/2011 - Complete
Wizard Behind the Wheel by willyolioleo reviews
Who knew that getting a driver's license could be such a hassle? Epilogue fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,975 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 306 - Follows: 189 - Published: 8/29/2011 - Harry P., Ron W.
Wolfsbane by lunakatrina reviews
Harry gets a new pet over the summer before his third year. AU, Gen
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 15 - Words: 30,278 - Reviews: 382 - Favs: 1,453 - Follows: 540 - Updated: 3/16/2011 - Published: 2/13/2011 - Harry P., Sirius B. - Complete
Gryffindors Never Die by ChipmonkOnSpeed reviews
Harry and Ron, both 58 and both alcoholics, are sent back to their 4th year and given a chance to do everything again. Will they be able to do it right this time? Or will history repeat itself? Canon to Epilogue, then not so much... (Reworked)
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 18 - Words: 74,394 - Reviews: 807 - Favs: 4,576 - Follows: 1,574 - Updated: 12/29/2010 - Published: 11/4/2010 - Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
Harry Potter and the Champion's Champion by DriftWood1965 reviews
Harry allows Ron to compete for him in the tournament. How does he fare? This is a Harry/Hermione story with SERIOUSLY Idiot!Ron Bashing. If that isn't what you like, please read something else. Complete but I do expect to add an alternate ending or two.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 109,219 - Reviews: 4792 - Favs: 14,711 - Follows: 6,109 - Updated: 11/26/2010 - Published: 11/1/2009 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
The Strange Disappearance of SallyAnne Perks by Paimpont reviews
Harry recalls that a pale little girl called Sally-Anne was sorted into Hufflepuff during his first year, but no one else remembers her. Was there really a Sally-Anne? Harry and Hermione set out to solve the chilling mystery of the lost Hogwarts student.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Suspense - Chapters: 11 - Words: 36,835 - Reviews: 2070 - Favs: 6,277 - Follows: 2,071 - Updated: 10/8/2010 - Published: 8/16/2010 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
In this World and the Next by RobSt reviews
Not for Weasley fans, dark beginning and rating is for safety. A Re-do with payback on the menu H/Hr Complete
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 26 - Words: 164,711 - Reviews: 5831 - Favs: 16,162 - Follows: 7,149 - Updated: 9/29/2010 - Published: 12/31/2009 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] - Complete
Timely Errors Requiem by Worfe reviews
A collections of unimportant, everyday moments missed from the fanfic Timely Errors...and how they change the world as we knew it. Warning, leaps through time expected.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 16,192 - Reviews: 163 - Favs: 818 - Follows: 803 - Updated: 4/13/2010 - Published: 7/7/2009 - Harry P., James P.
What They Don't Know by Lil Nezumi reviews
Permanently "ON HOLD" - How much does anyone really know about Harry Potter? Things could have been very different if Hagrid... AU, what if type of story.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 142,064 - Reviews: 533 - Favs: 1,127 - Follows: 1,318 - Updated: 3/20/2010 - Published: 9/18/2008 - Harry P.
Hedwig and the Goblet of Fire by Meteoricshipyards reviews
Harry uses Hedwig to test the restrictions on the Goblet of Fire. Obviously, they're not good enough to stop the smartest owl in Britain!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,993 - Reviews: 563 - Favs: 5,435 - Follows: 1,549 - Published: 2/26/2010 - Harry P., Parvati P. - Complete
Oh God Not Again! by Sarah1281 reviews
So maybe everything didn't work out perfectly for Harry. Still, most of his friends survived, he'd gotten married, and was about to become a father. If only he'd have stayed away from the Veil, he wouldn't have had to go back and do everything AGAIN.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 50 - Words: 163,659 - Reviews: 16667 - Favs: 30,006 - Follows: 12,978 - Updated: 12/22/2009 - Published: 9/13/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
Scorpius Malfoy and the Improbable Plot by opalish reviews
Scorpius really should have listened to his father's numerous and dire warnings about the Potter clan. Harry feels his pain. Gen crackfic WIP, yo. Seriously, so cracky.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 47,805 - Reviews: 1463 - Favs: 2,124 - Follows: 1,683 - Updated: 10/31/2009 - Published: 6/29/2008 - Scorpius M., Harry P.
Timely Errors by Worfe reviews
Harry Potter never had much luck, being sent to his parents’ past should have been expected. 'Complete' Time travel fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 13 - Words: 130,020 - Reviews: 2444 - Favs: 13,200 - Follows: 4,301 - Updated: 7/7/2009 - Published: 4/15/2008 - Harry P., James P. - Complete
Knowledge is Power by RobSt reviews
When Hermione gets cursed at the Ministry, Harry and the Death Eaters discover the power he knows not. Unleashing this power has far reaching consequences. Weasley and Dumbledore bashing – time travel story that's hopefully different.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 178,331 - Reviews: 4127 - Favs: 13,503 - Follows: 5,864 - Updated: 4/29/2009 - Published: 10/23/2008 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] - Complete
Trigger Happy by Rickysio reviews
Dumbledore, against his better judgement, decided to allow Alastor Moody custody of the Potter scion. Years later, he has to reap the whirlwind. Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,377 - Reviews: 135 - Favs: 1,655 - Follows: 457 - Published: 1/7/2009 - Harry P., Alastor M. - Complete
A Squib Worth by Naia reviews
The day Harry Potter turned eleven was the day he would have re-entered the magical world. But the letter never came; Harry Potter was a Squib. Dismissed by the wizards, he makes a quiet life for himself and will not stand for them to ruin it.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 20,460 - Reviews: 661 - Favs: 4,726 - Follows: 1,356 - Published: 1/5/2009 - Harry P., Hermione G. - Complete
Two Heads Are Better Than One by nonjon reviews
COMPLETE. OneShot. Either Fred and George played a prank on Harry, Harry played a prank on Fred and George, or they're all playing pranks on everybody. Although to be honest, it really doesn't matter how it happened. WARNING: crude, immature, ADULT humor.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,097 - Reviews: 365 - Favs: 1,520 - Follows: 432 - Published: 7/16/2008 - Complete
Harry's Pets by Shadows In The Sun reviews
Adopted by wolfydies.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 25,174 - Reviews: 668 - Favs: 2,357 - Follows: 2,106 - Updated: 5/20/2008 - Published: 4/10/2008 - Harry P.
A Black Comedy by nonjon reviews
COMPLETE. Two years after defeating Voldemort, Harry falls into an alternate dimension with his godfather. Together, they embark on a new life filled with drunken debauchery, thievery, and generally antagonizing all their old family, friends, and enemies.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 31 - Words: 246,320 - Reviews: 6776 - Favs: 20,629 - Follows: 7,866 - Updated: 4/7/2008 - Published: 2/18/2007 - Complete
Beauty in Death by Hebi R reviews
Luna truely loves threstrals.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 402 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 7 - Published: 2/28/2008 - Luna L. - Complete
Oswald the Ottoman by lunakatrina reviews
Voldemort never saw this coming! Harry aquires an ottoman...AU, ignores DH and most of HBP for it's own sanity
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,941 - Reviews: 432 - Favs: 1,696 - Follows: 477 - Updated: 2/18/2008 - Published: 1/31/2008 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
Luna's Hubby by Meteoricshipyards reviews
7 year old Luna wants a husband, and she wants one now. With the unintended help of her befuddled father, she kidnaps Harry Potter. Idea and 1st chapter by Roscharch's Blot
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 195,952 - Reviews: 2645 - Favs: 7,308 - Follows: 3,388 - Updated: 1/14/2008 - Published: 5/2/2006 - Harry P., Luna L. - Complete
The Acceptance by Pan06 reviews
With the Dursleys away in Majorca, Harry gets his first Hogwarts letter. Along with a whole lot of others. Which school will he chose and how will his choice effect the people and events that surround him? How will it effect his own future?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 19 - Words: 50,840 - Reviews: 1906 - Favs: 3,342 - Follows: 3,847 - Updated: 11/4/2007 - Published: 12/12/2006 - Harry P.
Mimbulus Mimbletonia by poggles reviews
Shipping Mimbulus MimbletoniaGinny.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 357 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/22/2007 - Ginny W., Harry P. - Complete
The Hunt For Harry Potter by Rorschach's Blot reviews
A Sequel to Make a Wish: Takes place directly after the events of 'Make a Wish,' Harry Potter is missing and his friends are determined to find him.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 51,144 - Reviews: 1767 - Favs: 6,399 - Follows: 3,029 - Updated: 3/22/2007 - Published: 7/7/2006 - Harry P. - Complete
So Sue Me by lunakatrina reviews
My take on Harry's first year starting with him getting his letters. Add a lot of sarcasm, stir, and serve cold.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 44,383 - Reviews: 2455 - Favs: 5,034 - Follows: 4,200 - Updated: 1/5/2007 - Published: 6/23/2006 - Harry P.
Billywigs by evansentranced reviews
Features: A massive conspiracy orchestrated by Dumbledore, repeated abuse of billywig stings, a nearfatal brush with a werewolf, an intervention, a skeptical Lily, a hotheaded Sirius, an addicted James, a slightly confused Remus, and a pseudogenius Peter.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 48,544 - Reviews: 138 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 11/22/2006 - Published: 11/20/2005 - James P., Sirius B. - Complete
Honestly, Headmaster by Meteoricshipyards reviews
Harry has to explain what happened last night to Headmaster Dumbledore.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,843 - Reviews: 447 - Favs: 3,181 - Follows: 678 - Published: 10/9/2006 - Complete
Just a Random Tuesday… by Twisted Biscuit reviews
A VERY long Tuesday in the life of Minerva McGonagall. With rampant Umbridgeitis, uncooperative Slytherins, Ministry interventions, an absent Dumbledore and a schoolwide shortage of Hot Cocoa, it’s a wonder she’s as nice as she is.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 58,525 - Reviews: 572 - Favs: 2,839 - Follows: 603 - Updated: 10/1/2006 - Published: 8/26/2006 - Minerva M., Dolores U. - Complete
First Encounter by Lyris Malachi reviews
Hogwarts has contracted a disease called loneliness and the giant squid as the only cure. Hogwartsgiant squid
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,180 - Reviews: 599 - Favs: 610 - Follows: 121 - Published: 8/9/2006 - Complete
Make A Wish by Rorschach's Blot reviews
Harry has learned the prophesy and he does not believe that a schoolboy can defeat Voldemort, so he decides that if he is going to die then he is first going to live.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 50 - Words: 187,589 - Reviews: 12129 - Favs: 26,227 - Follows: 9,869 - Updated: 6/17/2006 - Published: 3/23/2005 - Harry P. - Complete
Dimension Hopping for Beginners by nonjon reviews
COMPLETE. In the heat of the battle, he swore a blood oath to defeat Voldemort in every form. But when you factor in his understanding and abilities to travel to alternate dimensions, it presented the sort of problem only a Harry Potter could have.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Parody/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 56,035 - Reviews: 1332 - Favs: 4,372 - Follows: 1,675 - Updated: 3/13/2006 - Published: 3/4/2006 - Harry P. - Complete
The Chamber Strike by evansentranced reviews
Harry is sick of Umbridge and everyone pushing him around. Halfway through fifth year, he decides to Do Something about it. Warning: Contains nuts. And cults, falling sugar bowls, terrible handwriting, and beleaguered caretakers. Crack!fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,110 - Reviews: 318 - Favs: 1,779 - Follows: 468 - Published: 3/5/2006 - Harry P., Argus F. - Complete
Therapeutic Discussion by nonjon reviews
COMPLETE. OneShot. If you take one relatively normal savior of the world and then subconsciously put him through typical fanfiction plots in his sleep, what do you get? A very confused man in desperate need of therapy.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,358 - Reviews: 158 - Favs: 504 - Follows: 146 - Published: 11/26/2005 - Harry P. - Complete
The Marriage by Janara reviews
[Complete] At the start of Harry's seventh year Dumbledore has come up with the perfect way of ending the war. There is only one problem, Harry refuses to play the Headmaster's game. Will Harry be able to avoid the trap set by the aged wizard?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,058 - Reviews: 570 - Favs: 2,505 - Follows: 743 - Published: 6/4/2005 - Complete
Midnight Guardian by ksomm814 reviews
COMPLETE AU Third Year. What if a certain phone call pushed Uncle Vernon too far, changing everything? The truth will be revealed but which version will Harry believe? The past will be revealed along with the introduction of old aquaintances.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 78,560 - Reviews: 1320 - Favs: 5,087 - Follows: 1,401 - Updated: 10/16/2004 - Published: 9/11/2004 - Harry P., Remus L. - Complete
Die, Umbridge, Die by Dragon Mistress reviews
*WARNING: ORDER OF THE PHOENIX SPOILERS!* Who detests Dolores Umbridge? I do, I do! Who loves Sirius? I do, I do! Who loves knives? Sirius does, Sirius does!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,045 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 22 - Published: 6/29/2003