Poll: If you were to become a character in any book which one would it be? Vote Now!
Author has written 5 stories for Artemis Fowl, Maximum Ride, Warriors, and Star Trek: 2009.
Hey all! This is Owly speaking! yeah, I've just re-organized my profile, deleting a lot of stuff and starting anew...fun, right? You know how long it took me? An hour...yes, I know, very sad. But what can I say? I'M SOOO BORED!!
So first, a little bit about me:
My name is confidential.
My age is somewhere between 5 and 83. (Why 83? BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE IT!!) No, really. I could be six for all you know, just really really smart. (Or 83 and really young sounding...)
I am an INTP according to the Meyer Briggs test (which I've taken many many times, always with Introverted iNtuitive Thinking Perceiving. I am part of the 1 of the population who are like me, or something. Cool, huh?)
I love to read and write.
Figure skating is my sport. It's one of the only sports I'm actually good at (the other being horseback riding) and not to blow my own horn, but I'm pretty good. Only problem: It's expensive and I don't have the money to actually get better. :( I suffer from FSWS. Figure skating withdrawal syndrome. Why? Because my rink only has two hours of skating for figure skaters a week. NOT enough to satisfy my skating needs.
I absolutely positively love science and math too.
Have you ever felt that your life is boring? Like, if you just daydreamed enough, you might wake up one day in your favorite fandom? I dunno. I think that's why I started writing fanfiction in the first place: because I really can't stand my life. Anyone wanna commiserate?
LEGOLAS IS AWESOME!! AND SO IS WILL TURNER! IT'S ALMOST LIKE THEY'RE THE SAME PERSON...wait...
List of ten guys better than Edward Cullen (in no particular order):
1. Spock (or Zachary Quinto)
2. Chekov (or Anton Yelchin)
3. Legolas (or Orlando Bloom)
4. James T. Kirk (or Chris Pine)
5. Jesus Christ (AKA God)
6. My best friend, Boaz
7. Percy Jackson
8. Jack Sparrow
9. Jeremy Abbott (sp?)
10. Hikaru Sulu
11. Evan Lysacek
15. Harry Potter
16. Johnny Weir (even though he's weird...)
17. Adam Rippon
18. My friend from school, Quint
Oops. I went over 10. See? This proves that Edward Cullen isn't everything. Some of the guys on my list were even real!! -gasp- :)
Ok, just a quick rant on something here:
I'M A NERD AND PROUD OF IT!!
I'm obsessed with Star Trek. I know. You have a point?
I have a fictionpress account, but i'm still working on the beginning of an original story for it. :D
About all the stories that I've written: I'm really sorry they're not finished. You have no clue. I just don't know where to go. I really don't. :(
Flames usually upset me. Constructive criticism is much nicer. If you hate my story, please be nice about it. Haha, who am I kidding? If you hate my story, you're probably goign to flame it. Just remember: If you flame it, please tell me what you're flaming: whether the story line itself, the characters, or my writing. It would be most helpful. :) What I'm saying: PLEASE FLAME. Or if not flame, PLEASE CRITICIZE!! (But be precise. K thanx bai.)
I'm really hyper a lot, and can be really serious a lot. Depending on who you are and what I've eaten that day, you all know a different me!! :D
Ok, so now a little about my stories:
So, right now I've only got a few things written. And the few things I have written are hopelessly messed up, horrible, and incomplete. I'm sorry. Right now, they just don't talk to me. Ya know? It's like one of my favorite authors said once (It was Rick Riordan.) "You have to write a story that tells itself." So, those stories used to tell themselves, but right now they don't. I'm sorry!! On the bright side, I'm working on two fanfics that ARE writing themselves. So for anyone out there who (by some miracle, and probably a lot of head damage) likes my writing, here is the stuff I'm working on right now:
Star Trek: Girl thrown into the future, yada yada yada...Only problem: she believes everything is a hallucination. Why? Well, she has an unknown and possibly terminal disease, and had been suffering from frequent hallucinations from the medication. Funness ensues! Not sure if it's gonna be lighthearted or not, not sure if it's going to be 2009 Trek or TOS. I'm leaning towards TOS.
So, in this section we're going to have a bunch of funny little blurbs and stuff like that...enjoy!!
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was
born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When
I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you
go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism
15 Things to do when you're in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
15. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"
If you think that Twilight was horrible, but still think it'd be cool to have those special vampire powers, repost this. :)
This is Kitty. Copy and paste Kitty into your
Ways to know you are obsessed with PJO:
When its thundering, you wonder what Zeus is mad about.
you read all of Demigod Files the night it came out.
You have read the preview of the last olympian at least five times.
You think you are a demigod
when you get a sunburn, you blame Apollo
you have actually sworn on the river Styx
you have tried to explain greek mythology to small children.
you have corrected your social studies teacher during a unit on ancient greece.
you blame Hermes when your computer crashes
you will never go to Canada because you don't want to be eaten by Laistrygonians.
you say things like " oh my gods" or "go to tartarus"
You think you know who your olympian parent is.
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
This has got to be one of the most clever
THE MORSE CODE :
ELECTION - RESULTS:
A DECIMAL POINT:
ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
1. When you are sad, I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry!!
2. When you are blue, I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3. When you smile, I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.
4. When you are scared, I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
5. When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
6. When you are confused, I will use little words.
7. When you are sick, stay the heck away from me until you are well. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall, I will point and laugh at your clumsy butt.
This is my oath. I pledge it until the end. "Why?" you may ask. Because you are my friend. Friendship is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can truly feel its warmth.
When life gives you lemons, make grapefruit juice, and let life wonder how the heck you did that!
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?
Why is dyslexic so hard to spell?
Why is verb a noun?
Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we're already there?
Why is it called after dark when really it's after light?
Here's a joke...
there are 3 men who need to get across a lake...
the 1st one prays to God asking for the strength to get across...
he gets big muscles and swims across...
but almost dies 5 times...
the 2nd 1 prays to God for the strength and the tools he needs to get across...
he gets his big muscles and boat and rows across...
but he almost dies 3 times...
the 3rd 1 prays to God, for the strength, tools, and the brains...
he turns into a woman...
walks 4 yards...
and crosses the bridge
Ways to Annoy people at the cinema:
Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"
Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.
Clap when the good guy gets killed.
During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"
Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!"
Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.
Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.
Yell out what is going to happen.
Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.
Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is.
Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row.
Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are.
Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.
Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.
Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming.
Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...)
Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.
Try to start a wave.
Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first.
Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window.
Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"
Sing with the theme music.
Bring and use your own air freshener.
At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."
Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off.
Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.
Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.
Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!"
Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.
Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen.
Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late.
When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"
Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.
Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?"
Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie.
Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.
Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat"
Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head.
Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.
When someone walks by you in the aisle scream, "Ahhhhhh! Bad Touch!"
Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself.
Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle.
During a love scene, stand up and run to the screen shouting "Hooters!"
Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room.
Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!"
Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!"
Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"
Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can here it, like when the killer’s name is going to be said.
Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones.
Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one.
Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes.
Pass by a room that’s showing a movie you’ve already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the ending
Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who's drinking my water!
Ten things to see before you die
1. A vegitarian be eaten by an animal.
2. An emo kid talk about happy bunnies.
3. Homer say somthing intellegent.
4. Taxes disaper.
5. Voldemort destroy one of his Horcruxes.
6. Micheal Jackson be stalked by children.
7. Children take over class and teach teacher in child subjects, such as: armpit farts, skate-boarding, real music, ect.
8. Wrestling people forget their moves.
9. The coyote catch the road runner.
10. The reation of the teen population if abercombie was closed and it was illegle to wear thier clothing.
Ten Signs of Obsession with a Book (Series) or Movie
10. You are constantly thinking about it.
9. You have at least a billion characterizations and opinions about it and want to discuss it 24/7.
8.You are thinking of parodies for it and posting them in fanfiction.net.
7.You have a billion questions you want to ask the author (e.g. Does Annabeth have a bellybutton? How does Edward react when he hears sixties' music?).
6. Your friends and immediate family notice that this book (series) or movie is all you ever talk about.
5. You daydream about it when you are bored.
4.You are constantly thinking of sequels or prequels and putting them on fanfiction.net.
3. When you doodle, it happens to be one or more characters or a symbol in the book (series) or movie.
2.You reread/rewatch the book (series) or movie on a daily basis.
1. You think about it every night before you go to sleep.
LEXOPHILES (LOVERS OF WORDS):
1. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.
2. A will is a dead giveaway.
3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
4. A backward poet writes inverse.
5. In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.
6. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
7. If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.
8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
9. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat miner.
10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
11. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
12. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.
13. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
14. Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.
15. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
16. A calendar's days are numbered.
17. A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine.
18. A boiled egg is hard to beat.
19. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
20. A plateau is a high form of flattery.
21. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large.
22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
23. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.
24. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.
25. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
26. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
27. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
28. Acupuncture: a jab well done.
29. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet
When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crud out of them.
The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not
Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?" That's a really good question...i wonder...
Really Dumb Store labels:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Too late!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (As night follows day . . .)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope.)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I gotta admit, I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash.)
On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". (So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon.)
A True Boyfriend =
When she walks away from you mad
When she stare's at your mouth
When she pushes you or hit's you
When she start's cussing at you
When she's quiet
When she ignore's you
When she pull's away
When you see her at her worst
When you see her start crying
When you see her walking
When she's scared
When she lay's her head on your shoulder
When she steals your favorite hat
When she teases you
When she doesnt answer for a long time
When she look's at you with doubt
When she say's that she like's you
When she grab's at your hands
When she bump's into you
When she tell's you a secret
When she looks at you in your eyes
When she misses you
When you break her heart
When she says its over
When she repost this bulletin
Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.-
When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go-
When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you-
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her-
Call her before you sleep and after you wake up-
Treat her like she's all that matters to you.-
Tease her and let her tease you back.-
Stay up all night with her when she's sick.-
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.-
Give her the world.-
Let her wear your clothes.-
When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.-
Let her know she's important.-
Kiss her in the pouring rain.-
When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
I love funny quotes. Here are some that I absolutely love!
"Hi Christopher. I'm Nero." -Nero from Star Trek 2009.
"You greenblooded hobgoblin!" -McCoy. (!!)
"Out of the chair." -Spock
"Live long and prosper." -Spock and pretty much every other dang Vulcan in Star Trek.
Jack: "MY PEANUT!!"
Chekov: "Nine-four- weector- weector- two."
"I can do zat! I can do zat!" -Chekov.
McCOY: Permission to speak freely, sir?
"You're from the future. That's brilliant! Do they still have sandwiches there?" -Scotty
"Numb tongue? I can fix that!" (McCoy hypos Jim). "DANG IT!!"
"I had a seat...in the bathroom!" -Bones
"I suffer from aviophobia...the fear of dying in something that flies!!" -McCoy
Pike: "Any one here have any hand to hand combat training?"
Elizabeth: "There will come a moment when you will have the chance to do the right thing."
Jack: "Gentlemen! I wash my hands of this weirdness."
Jack: "Why would he do that? Because he's a lummox, isn't he? Well, we shall have a magnificent garden party and you're not invited!"
"The cow says moo." (visit my school chorus for an explanation, or just Pm me. either one works. :)
"We must fight-to run away!" Captain Jack Sparrow
"I've got a jar of dirt, I've got a jar of dirt, and guess what's inside it!" Captain Jack Sparrow
"Where is it? Where is the thump-thump?" Captain Jack Sparrow
Me, I'm dishonest. And you can always trust a dishonest person to be dishonest. Honestly. But it's the honest ones you have to look out for, because they're the ones who will always do something stupid. - Jack Sparrow
"You forgot one very important thing: I'm Captain Jack Sparrow"-um, If i have to tell you who said that, you need to go get your head checked.
"BLEEEEAAAAAAARGH!" -me, waking up in the morning to find out that it really is monday and that I need to learn to count the days of the weekend.
"GOOD GRIEF ALAN!" my science teacher yelling at one of my friends.
"SHARKS WITH LASERS!" my ancient history teacher.
"Power corrupts, but absolute power is kinda cool." some sign i saw somewhere.
"What the heck is filaful" my teacher. I don't know about the spelling there.
"Skating comes first, food comes second. Wait...did I just say that?" -a coach i knew once.
The fool appears wise until he opens his mouth. The Bible
I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge. J.R.R Tolkien
I am told that I talk in shorthand and then smudge it. J.R.R Tolkien
It is the job that is never started that takes longest to finish. J.R.R. Tolkien
"hahahahaha (Just FYI it's hysterical laughter right there.) OH LOOK A DOGGGIE!!" -me on a sugarless sugar high. :D
And now for some fun copy and pasty-thingies!!
If you want to talk to Voldemort through the Diary Horcrux, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever tried to perform "accio" or any other spell with a stick, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you secretly believe (and hope) that J.K.R. is really a Hogwarts alumni pretending it is fictional, copy this into your profile.
If you are in lala land most of the time copy this into your profile.
If you don't have a myspace and you don't want a myspace, copy this into your profile.
if you're different in a good way put this in your profile.
If every time you hear the word rum, you automatically think of Captain Jack Sparrow, copy and paste this into your profile!
If, for some odd reason, you noticed that it was a miracle that something from the ship didn’t conk Lord Beckett in the noggin when he was about to die, copy and paste this to your profile.
A large percent of authors do not know the difference between 'your' and 'you're'. If you do know the difference, copy and paste this to your profile
If you ever wanted to be a hero from Greek mythology, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever tripped over a "Watch your step" sign, copy and past this into your profile.
Everyone is out there, swooning over McCoy or Kirk or Spock. Anyone else think Chekov is adorable?! Copy and paste if you do!
If you HATE twilight except for the fact that the special vampire talents are AWESOME, repost this.
If you know some people that deserve to be run over by a bus, copy and past this into your profile.
If you LOVE Orlando Bloom, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you know that PIRATES are indeed better than ninjas, please copy. (No offense to Ninja people out there)
If you feel that classical music is AWESOME, but under appreciated by others, copy this.
If you wish you can enter the world of POTC and make differences in that world, copy this.
If you had that urge to want to sing "I Got a Jar of Dirt", copy this.
If you are addicted to Fan-Fiction, copy this.
If you are obsessed with Pirates of the Caribbean, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with Pirates of the Caribbean, copy and paste this into your profile. (hums "Yo Ho Yo Ho A Pirates Life For Me")
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have the most RANDOM dreams, copy this.
If you daydream 24/7, copy this to your profile.
If you were the girl who dreamed of a Starfleet captain while the other girls were dreaming of a vampire, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
Ninety-Five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, and put it in your profile
98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you are one of the two percent who haven't, copy and paste this into your profile.
92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing your butt off.
If you are so obsessed with POTC, that you want the movies to be based off of true events, copy this.
If you can go on a sugar buzz without even eating sugar, again, join the club and copy and paste this to your profile.
If you are completely and without a doubt random, copy and paste this to your profile. THIS IS SPARTA!!
If you've ever accidentally spoken in chatspeak, copy and paste this into your profile.
If sometimes your fanfics seem to write themselves, copy this into your profile.
If sometimes your fanfics seem to write themselves, copy this into your profile.
If you're looking at these copy and paste things and thinking: I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE!, copy and paste this into your profile!
If you ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile.
If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get like two reviews, copy this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!
If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile
Well, that's the end of my profile. Did you enjoy it? Any suggestions? Well, if there are, I hope you PM me and tell me. Don't worry, I dont' bite. I'm pretty friendly most of the time!! :)
P.S. I'd really appreciate it if you'd read my stories and leave a constructive comment or two. Not too harsh, please, i'm sensitive. :D
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