Fatality of Mortality
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Joined 02-05-08, id: 1493267, Profile Updated: 03-11-10

The Flaming Capacity

Greetings, my friend. Allow me to introduce myself: My name is Fatality of Mortality, previously known as Ghost of Beethoven, and I'm a no-bullshit flamer.

If you wish to bitch and moan about how I conduct myself, please do not hesitate to PM me. I love showing off your stupidity to the rest of the site. ;) If you'd rather brave a public confrontation than a private one, feel free to do it here. It's a forum I visit from time to time and any and all crybabies are welcomed.

The Reviewer Revolution

I have joined the review revolution, post this in your profile and join the revolution!

I, Fatality of Mortality, do solemnly swear to review every story I read, both enjoyable and atrocious. I will give credit where it is due and will never leave a review that reads like "gr8 job! i luv this so much so plz update asap!11". I recognize my right of freedom of speech, and I acknowledge that I am entitled to my honest opinion - not that of the majority of your readers. I also promise to enforce the rules of this site and will not hold back on reminding you that by posting your work on this site for everyone to see, I am allowed to review how I see fit and if you do not like it, you can either leave the site or limit the viewing of your work to only your friends and family.

The Writing Rules

- Use correct spelling like you actually graduated first grade. (Or that you at least know how to use a spellchecker.)

- Use correct grammar/punctuation/capitalization like the intelligent person you're supposed to be.

- Write a correct summary. ("I suck as summaries" is not a summary, dipshit.)

- Write a Mary-Sue. (I dare you.)

- Give your story a proper title. ("Untitled" or improper capitalization will not tolerated.)

- Do not abuse the emphasis tools (Bold/Italics/Underline/combination of the three). (I will rip you a new one for attempting to blind me.)

- Do not come into my fandom, thinking you can get away with your shitty attitude or pathetic, half-assed attempt at fanfiction.

- Do not blatantly disregard the site's more-than-obvious Rules/Guidelines. (No one is above them, including you.)

- Take/decline Constructive Criticism maturely or you'll be shown to be the ungrateful little shit that you are.

- Do not try to take me on for you will fail miserably. (I'm a Flamer, therefore my common sense and ability to catch you in your lies and bluffs are much more superior to your own.)

- Do not write about sex if you have no idea how a penis works or which hole the vagina is.

- Do not write Slash if you can't even keep the characters in-character in a normal romance fic.

- Do not act like you're the hottest thing to ever enter my selected fandom because you're not; I am. (And I do not plan on stepping down from my throne any time soon.)

- Do not demand reviews in exchange for updates. (Prostitution should be confined to street corners and away from our respectable fandoms.)

- Do not attempt to scare me with your crying to the administrators, thinking you're the first or last to do so.

- Instead of raping my eyes with poorly-written PMs and thus proving to me just how completely useless you are, actually listen to me when I explain why I flamed you.

- Do not listen to your Troll 'Viewers unless their praise is actually constructive and not "omg this was grate!" or "update soon!1!"

- Do not immaturely question my motives for you will not be able to fully comprehend the depth of my reasoning (i.e. "omg why did u flaem me?!1 ur so meen u no that!?1!").

- Mind your own business. (And that includes letting your BFF or favorite author fend for themselves. You insult them when you stand up for them because it then leaves me questioning if the author is mentally retarded or is just too much of a coward to confront me themselves.)

- Do not bait me with your "NO FLAMMZ ALOWD!!11" (I consider it a direct challenge.)

- Keep your ego in check or get out.

- Your feeble arrogance makes my much more powerful arrogance laugh, so you can stop lying to yourself when you think or say you're better than me.

The Blocking Rules

I make it a point to let those I tear down defend themselves with their usual whining. In fact, I expect it. However, I will not stand for trolling. Do not PM or spam me, acting like an immature dumbass who thinks it's cute to be annoying and childish. (i.e. Narakus-Unseen-Mistress:"Yawn! Bore me... blah blah blah!")

I'm mature when I PM you, so the least you can do is attempt the same. If you can't, especially if I've warned you a first time, then I'll block you and move on. I have more important things to do than to waste my time on teens/adults who want to act like seven-year-olds.

If you happen to be a friend or a fan of an author I've flamed and you're coming to express your outrage, I will respond with something similar to "mind your own business" and then block you. You were not the one I flamed, therefore what you have to say is of no importance to me.

The Reiterated

"u hav know lyfe!!"
Yes, I have no life.

"how cann u flaim meh win u oviuosly cant writte urself?!1 were r UR stroies!?"
Do you honestly think I would be stupid enough to post anything under this account? That I'd be stupid enough to not realize the repercussions of flaming? If you do, then you're just hopeless. I already know that all of you want the opportunity to "give me a taste of my own medicine", but because you can't, saying something like "he can't write stories" to your BFF is apparently the best thing you can come up with.

"itz ovious u hav deppresion issues!1!"
The only thing that saddens me is how thoroughly ruined this site is due to the extreme neglectfulness/laziness of its staff. Most (if not all) of you have reported me to the administrators and yet I'm still standing. Your haughty threats of reporting me, truly thinking that the staff has your back, makes me laugh so hard that it actually brings tears to my eyes. That's how "poor" my self-esteem is. However, I appreciate your concern over my well-being nonetheless.

"ur juz jellous!!"
I'm never jealous of those I flame because those I flame are shitty writers.

"u looser! u r juz sum droppout hwo oviously fialed n stuff!!"
Yes. That would probably explain why my grammar and syntax are better than a good two-thirds of those on this site.

"u r juz a bullie!! leeve meh aolne u bullie!!"
I've never physically or mentally abused anyone in my life. If you sincerely believe that that's what I'm doing to you with my no-bullshit reviews, then you might want to rethink me being the one who has a self-esteem issue. By posting your work on this site, you've allowed any and everyone to comment (unless you've disabled Anonymous Reviewing) on it, including Flamers. And because I flame for a reason, if I've brutally knocked your story down, then you deserved it for one or more previously said reasons. You've posted your story on this public site for a reason: to be recognized and to get lots of awesome reviews. If this is not the case, then you shouldn't have any complaints when I suggest that you keep your work private. After all, not once did it say in the site's Rules/Guidelines that every review has to kiss your ass and love your story.

"im knot a torll! UR a trolll!"
In order to be a troll, I would have to be sitting on my ass all day long, flaming random stories with things like "this sucks!", and just being an overall irritant to everyone. The last I checked, I only flame on request and when I have the time, use personalized flames, and I'm an overall irritant to those who consider me a troll.

"butt dis iz my 1st stroie!!1!"
Then congratulations on receiving your first flame.

"im a foreigner! giv meh a brake!!1"
There are enough Americans who can't write simple, average stories as it is, so I would really appreciate it if you didn't contribute to it. Get a Beta-Reader, study harder on the English language, or just write in your own language, please.

"I'm in Spacal Ed in other words I'm bad at Grammer and spelling" (copied and pasted from inudemon02's profile)
I don't care if you're missing both eyeballs and half your brain. Get a a goddamned Beta-Reader or stop posting your awful shit.

"i dnt hav spel chek so leev meh alone!11!"
FF.net already provides one for you. Use it, dipshit.

"o yea?! wel, mi frends leik mi storie!1"
And as you can see, I am not your friend, therefore I have the balls to tell you that you can't write for shit.

"i waz depresed wen i rote dis!!"
Then get put on Prozac and hire a therapist. Clearly, writing isn't helping your emo problems.

"What do you know? I'm the one who has thirty degrees from ten different colleges!"
Am I supposed to be impressed with your memory capacity and your stamina to read long, boring books on the social culture of humans? Well, I apologize, but I'm not. Book smarts are not, and never will be, the equivalent of pure, "natural talent," so you can kindly take your thirty degrees and shove them up your ass. Writing is for those who do not ever need to spout out their education level as a way of defending themselves.

Rules/Guidelines of Fanfiction.net (copied and pasted directly)

Entries Not Allowed:
- Non-stories: lists, bloopers, polls, previews, challenges, author notes, and etc.
- One or two liners.
- MST: comments inserted in between the flow of a copied story.
- Stories with non-historical and non-fictional characters: actors, musicians, and etc.
- Any form of interactive entry: choose your adventure, second person/you based, Q&As, and etc.
- Chat/script format and keyboard dialogue based entries.

Writer's Responsibility:
Spell check all stories and poems.There is no excuse for not doing this. If you do not have a word processor that has the spell checking feature, use a search engine such as Google.Com to find one.
- Proofread all entries for grammar and other aspects of writing before submission. 'Hot off the press' content is often riddled with errors. No one is perfect but it is the duty of the writer to perform to the best of his/her ability.
- Respect the reviewers. Not all reviews will strictly praise the work. If someone rightfully criticizes a portion of the writing, take it as a compliment that the reviewer has opted to spend his/her valuable time to help improve your writing.
- Everyone here is an aspiring writer. Respect your fellow members and lend a helping a hand when they need it. Like many things, the path to becoming a better writer is often a two way street.
- Use proper textual formatting. For example: using only capital letters in the story title, summary, or content is not only incorrect but also a disregard for the language itself.

The Shit List

- BestWriter2004 (Troll)
- Blackhorse1 (Troll 'Viewer/Liar)
- Chezara (Suethor/Deluded)
- CFighter (Retarded Troll 'Viewer/LMAO-worthy)
- Corona 1 (LMAO-worthy; Fucktard)
deepblue1028 (Suethor/Fucktard)
- DragonSpawn2183 (Fucktard/Utter Fanboy)
- ForeverMegatron's (Suethor)
- futurcag (Fucktard)
- Gaara's-pandachan101 (Suethor/Fucktard)
- Helena-Vasquez (Troll/Crybaby)
- Hiruma'sgirl101 (Suethor/Shameless Self-Inserter)
- inudemon02 (Shit-Writer/Troll/Rule-Breaker)
- jetfiregirl (LMAO-worthy/Fucktard/Retarded Troll 'Viewer)
- Lightchild12 (LMAO-worthy/Retarded Troll 'Viewer)
- M.Seijin (LMAO-worthy/Fucktard)
- Miss Claire Cullen (Attention Whore/Rule Breaker/Crybaby)
- Narakus-Unseen-Mistress (Canon!Suethor)
- Nola1 (Retarded Troll 'Viewer)
nothing for nothing 1 (Fucktard/Shit-Writer/Troll)
- OptimusDaughter (Fucktard/Anti-ConCrit)
- OptimusxElita4ever (LMAO-worthy/Silly Fucktard)
- Phoenix13 (The "Transformers/Beast Wars" fandom's obvious Snob)
- quitter (LMAO-worthy; he left because he couldn't take the flames)
- RubyXRaven (Suethor)
- SkYzLiLLGuRLiEE (Plagiarist; Troll)
- ShadowShock (Coward/Fucktard)
- stained pearls (Fucktard)
- Storm Blue Lightning Saix (Retarded Troll 'Viewer)
- Taki-kun (Plagiarist)
- Terra and Bouldarian AHEM j00 (Fucktard/LMAO-worthy)
- The-I-Hate-Club (Troll Flamer)
- The Real Optimus Prime (Suethor/Shit-Writer)
- Unique Cullen o.O (Fucktard/Troll 'Viewer)
- Valamon (Suethor)
- Vanny Pegasus-Ketchum (Fucktard)
- XXXbloodyrists666XXX (Troll)
- xLadyxFelinex (Fucktard; Anti-ConCrit)

Fucktarded In-Depth

- Came into the Transformers/Beast Wars fandom and started Troll 'Viewing, particularly attaching themselves like a leech to the author, scienceteacherSE. They show their true Troll 'Viewing skills by kissing the author's ass, saying "Well, we were all warned about the beginning in the descript" when said author thought she could get away with breaking the rules by posting graphic scenes of rape and violence under a "T rating." They also like to talk big, but they have yet to actually grow a pair and confront me with their beef like everyone else. Talking shit in their profile, but not answering my PMs proves that they are a coward at best, only showing their face when their favorite author and I get into an arguement.

- Bashes pairings and certain characters in the Naruto fandom, going into detail on how this couple will never work and how that character is stupid. Fanfiction is fanfiction. As long as it's well-written and related somehow to the fandom its listed in, it doesn't matter what it's about. It's one thing to say you don't like a certain pairing or a certain character, but it's another to outright disown them as possible, likeable fanfiction material. That's not an opinion; that's just ignorance.

- Says this at the bottom of her profile about Flamers, "I am tired of the immature attitudes of the people on this site that seem to get their kicks and thrills by flaming other writers and causing arguments both here on the boards and through personal emails." She has convienently forgotten to mention that she, a "mature" 34-year-old, was flamed because she posted a long note (not a story, like it should have been) in the Transformers/Beast Wars fandom, telling everyone that she and Mischievous Crystal were on "good terms" again after some big blow out over their less-than-desirable story ideas. She learned the hard way that no one (not even her) is above the rules, and that no one rightly gave a shit about her problems.

- Has twenty-two stories, all in the Inuyasha fandom, and all of which are distasteful, plot-less, rushed, and boring. In her story "Escape", she tells her readers in her author's note about how said story was written for an anonymous "flamer" who had claimed that they had read all of her stories and had said that "they were all the same". While I seriously doubt that that anonymous reviewer was a Flamer (merely someone who didn't leave her praise, thus she must have figured that they were a Flamer because of it), I do agree with what they had said about her work. In her stories, Kagome is constantly depicted as either a foul-mouthed whore who has sex at least fives times in each chapter, or is shown to be a submissive whore who allows herself to be molested by any character, and then has sex with them . . . at least five times in each chapter. The sex, while it is not written so horribly that it makes me second-guess my own sex life, is painfully boring and hardly varied, and because of how frequent it happens, I've reason to believe that it's just the author's way of venting her own sexual frustrations and fantasies. I've also come to learn that when she gets a review that isn't worshipping her, she makes it a habit of posting another poorly written story in "dedication" to that reviewer. (She dedicated the one-shot "Sin" to me, but I feel cheated because it wasn't personally written for me, but merely an "old" story she managed to dig up from her pile of refuge.) In the end, this author is a Canon!Suethor, cruelly stripping Kagome of everything in-character and making every Canon male in the fandom fall instantly in love with her in stories that are clearly written with no direction or point.

nothing for nothing 1:
- Not much is quite known about this troll, but it is clear that she is incapable of writing decent fanfiction, doesn't possess even the basic levels of human intelligence, and is need of real friends rather than her imaginary ones. Her recent profile update is laughable at best being that it's all about "the flamers she wants to get rid of", including myself. It's quite curious as to why she hates me seeing as the others listed on her profile have actually flamed her whereas I have not. In actuality, I didn't even realize she was plaguing this site until she took it upon herself to troll me with spam. All I did was simply, and rightfully, brush her off as a retarded child in need of special attention. It's clear that she didn't appreciate it when I blocked her for being a waste of my time and a waste of inbox space when she continued to be a dipshit. Also in her profile, she has responded to her flames with things like this: "Shut up, You troll. Let's see if you can do any better. If you stink, too bad. Don't babble about how bad i am. Shut your diarrhea mouth or i'll sew it up, you little stupid puppet." She also stupidly believes that respectable, intelligent critics/flamers like myself would actually bother ourselves into making a forum about her in retaliation when she created a member-less forum against us flamers, also known as "I Hate Flamers! Club". Someone kindly needs to inform her that she is being delusional into believing that she is actually a force to be reckoned with when the cold, hard facts actually speak that she is just an immature child who is not, and never will be important enough for that kind of attention. She is merely a troll with shitty stories and has yet to out-grow the censorship of profane words, likely taught to her by her parents like usual.

- Has some sort of mental problem and an ego the size of the planet. After kindly requesting that she properly format the title "I'll watch over you tonight" (because I wanted the Transformers/Beast Wars fandom to look tidy), she PMs back with the most unbelievably hostile response that not even any of my flames have received before. What was really entertaining was that after she was flamed in response to her unwarrented hostility, she took down both her stories in order to save face after I told her that people would now see how horribly messed up she really was. She then posted this at the bottom of her profile: "Also, I fear to tell you this in case some cold-hearted people choose to use this to their advantage, but I am a highly-sensitive person and can be hurt easily. My only request in this matter is that if and when you ever give me any constructive criticism, that you are gentle when telling me what you do and do not like about my stories and where you believe I need to make improvements. I appreciate all negative and positive feedback, as long as it's honest, but please be gentle as I am very sensitive."

I do not believe that she is "sensitive" but more that she is a psycho. She is so full of herself that instead of admitting that she was wrong, she lies in an attempt to make me out to be some sort of monster, claiming that I was not gentle, "constructive", or "honest" in my first review. "Highly-sensitive" couldn't be farther from the truth unless I tacked on "in the head" at the end.

- It would seem cowardliness is quite a common trait here on FF.net. Allow me to explain myself: I received a message a while back, asking to check out and review a story that was promoting a message against Mary-Sues, clichés and Cybertronian/Human romance fics. I supported the formers, but not the latter, and that was the whole reason why I was asked to investigate in the first place, as well as give my opinion on the author's skills. Plot-wise, I thought it was all right; grammar-wise, it needed a bit of improvement, and I said so in my review. ShadowShock is quite a shock indeed, for she left a large, praising review that was basically telling the author to ignore all of her critics while kissing her ass the whole time. I particularly enjoyed this last bit at the end of her review, "And finally, please don't take Fatality of Mortality to heart. If one cannot write a critique without oozing poison, they really weren't trying to write an honest critique. Those who can, write. Those who can't, flame."

I've quite a lot of problems with this author. For one, her account is quite old, but disturbingly she still hasn't mastered the ability to leave real reviews or figure out what is constructive criticism and what is a flame. For the former, I enjoyed in her review how she didn't mention all the things that needed to be fixed - things that are universal, no matter where the hell you live, like needing to use proper punctuation. It would seem that because she can read it just fine, it must mean there are no grammar mistakes being made. How horribly conceited of her. I know someone who can read things in all bold format and another who has no problem reading massive, single blocks of text . . . but that doesn't mean it's correct.

For the latter, I would love for her to point out where my review turned into a flame because I know I could sounded much worse. She must have read my profile first, realized I was a flamer and instantly became another biased twit before she reviewed, so I'm guessing I could have been praising the author and I still would have been seen as a nasty flamer. As for not being allowed to express my opinion because I don't have any stories published on the site . . . quite curious. I believe I'll post one so that I can then put this ignorant thought to rest. Because according to the wonderful ShadowShock, only the opinions of those who have stories can be taken into consideration. Never mind if the story is a piece of shit, just so long as you have one, right?

I also want to point out that she is a coward for she has blocked me, possibly immediately after she published the review. Why? Because she felt I was going to retaliate? Well, I would have, but not in the way she has clearly assumed. I wouldn't have touched her stories, but she's biased, so of course she would have thought as much. I can still put her in her place because I have over ten accounts at my disposal. But I'm lazy and I'm not exactly in the mood to explain myself to such an ignorant person. I don't believe she deserve such enlightenment, actually. She can remain in the dark while the rest of continue to grow in our maturity and intelligence.

- I'm quite disappointed in someone as moralistic as this woman. Despite how open-minded she is about issues that shouldn't be issues in the world, she is quite repulsive and immature toward the rules of this site, her reasons for writing and any form of con-crit she gets. I should have realized that I was dealing with a childish woman when she had boo-hoo'd in her A/N about someone like me putting her on my Favorite Authors list. What adult does that, complaining when someone they dislike likes them? She sounds very much like a girl in first grade whining, "STOP IIIIT!" to a boy who keeps staring at her because he knows she doesn't like it. Not to mention, for someone who abhors my style of reviewing, she has made sure to make me popular (in a good way, probably much to her chagrin) by going on about horrible I am in her A/N, telling her readers to not visit my page . . . and then gives out my profile name. It's obvious that she was hoping to get her dedicated fan group to rise up like an insane mob and attempt to force me off the site all because she was offended that I was impressed with her morals. Apparently they didn't agree because the ones who did contact me were supportive of my reviewing methods.

Out of sixty-four chapters, I have counted six that are just massive Author's Notes and thirteen where a third of the content is an author's note, including her recent one where she childishly dismisses my 'flame' on her need of a reality check. She has recently agreed to take them down due to another reviewer's words, but says it may take a while because she's "rather busy". The last I checked, deleting chapters takes only a few seconds, and if the woman can write massive chapters, she can take a few minutes to delete shit that she already knows is against the rules.

OMGLMFAOWTF?-ing Moments

"Jazz gets spanked. don't say this story sucks beacause you all know I am better than half the writers on here! Including technostatic07 and HopelessRomantic17! they're both trolls! and they both suck at writting unlike me! ."
- WEALLSCREAM4ICESCREAM's story summary.

"I will NEVER. And I mean NEVER Flame anyone for writing a Mary Sue. They're an important part of writing as far as I am concerned."
- piece from Gaara's-pandachan101's profile.

". . . for all the assholes hating on my story, GET OVER YOURSELVES. You know this fic is kickass and that you’re so damn envious that you can’t find anything better to do than insult me. Y.D.I.W., you need to get a life. Don’t bother reviewing my fic again or I’ll block your dumb ass. Don’t read my fic if it’s not to your liking. I’d really like to see you come up with something better than I have. My fic is entirely original, dickweed. Quit hating on it. I also don't see how my love for Ash Ketchum has anything to do with this fic. If anything, it would have something to do with my fantastic Pokemon fic, not this one."
- Author's Note from Vanny Pegasus-Ketchum.

"Ok what the hell are you talking about your pyhco and yeas my story was sick in the beggin but if you would of read the end you would of saw the rrason why he married his mom.Now my storys gone I don't know why"
- BestWriter2004's review reply to his own story.

"yes, i did ask for NO FLAMMERS so i would call that ABUSE, yes i reported the flammer and i am letting all the PPL no i AM GOING TO KEEP WRITING AND THERE MIGHT EVEN BE A SEQUEl. I DIDN"T RIGHT THe STORY FOR SPECIFiCLY U ( the person who flamed me.) so really idc wat you say and am going to finish my story. idc wat ppl think of my story i just care wat i think about it and LOVE it so far, thanks 4 giving me some pointers but you don't have to be so mean about it. just letting people no i a going to keep writing this story!"
- Barbarolover122293's review reply to her own story.

"shut yer fat round (mystery curse word) up merrypissmeoff! just because you can't write or submit a story doesn't mean you can make fun of others who actually have some writting talent. your nothin' but a scared little whimp who has nothin' better to do than to make others feel lower than yourself. i'm very sure that you bashed my oneshot because i bashed YOU!"
- Maiko-DarkAngel's review reply to her own story all because of this review: "Even your own writing needs work."

"WOO-HO GO ME FOR WRITTING THE BEST FIC IN THE U.S. REIGION! (in my opinion of course.)"
- Maiko-DarkAngel's review to her own story.

"Okay, first off, if you steal ANYTHING from my fanfics, I swear I'll f@ing kill you. I HATE theft, and I won't let you off the hook easily, if at all."
- Chezara's statement of delusion in her profile.

"Don't you dare make up a I Hate Nothing For Nothing 1 club, or i'll report you. If you want banned, go ahead. You'll see you made the wrong choice."
- piece from nothing for nothing 1's profile, believing that anyone would actually consider her a threat.

- nothing for nothing 1's review to her own story when she was rightfully flamed. Her age shows, and I'm quite sure she's not thirteen, the age requirement that's mandatory for registering. If anyone needs to be banned, it's this little brat, for she shouldn't even be here.

"Please stop flaming me. I'm only young and i'm trying to inprove. Please stop. I know i'm not good, but i need your help. Please."
- nothing for nothing 1's sudden change of heart after I flamed one of her stories, partly because it was a piece of shit, but mostly because
she was being a little shit.

"Fatality Of Moratily: I'n not a brat, or a troll, or a retard, or anything else you called me. How dare you list me on your list! I have blocked you and don't whine to me to tell me to unblock you because i won't. Ever."
- piece taken from nothing of nothing 1's profile. Irritating little shit, isn't she? I sense hitting a nerve somewhere.

"Watch out, you flamers, because you might be on my flamers list, too. Let's see if your the cake for the flamers list."
- from nothing for nothing 1's profile, because she's really 'got us on the run now' . . .

"If you want lyrics, you've come to the right place. You have a request, send me a PM and i will look it up and copy and paste it into my profile. I don't do rap, or mean music."
- from nothing for nothing 1's profile, because she believes everyone is a dumber shit than she is and that we can't possibly know how to just google the song title ourselves and simply copy the lyrics from one of the thousands of sites it'll list for us.

"It's funny how you flamers reply to me on your profile. I laugh so hard i choke. I will annoy the heck out of you flamers as much as i want, and all you can do is get over that i blocked you."
- from nothing for nothing 1's profile. As you can see, I'm allowing her to assume that I can't get around the block she has on this account when I've about ten more at my disposal. I do believe it's going to be a lovely day when I decide to finally pop her little bubble of arrogance by PMing her and flaming her other shitfics. I'd have done it already, but I'm extremely lazy, and so far she's yet to do anything that would rouse me off my ass to do said flaming. She continues to remain only an irritating roach.

The Bitching and Moaning

Author: Mrs. Charles Lee Ray (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1513781/)
Words of Stupidity:
"Dear Ghost of Beethoven, You have no idea who you're f.u.c.k.i.n.g. with, do you? Well, now you are being politely informed that you are dealing with a serial killer. I am going to claw your throat open, grab your internal organs, and hang them by miscellanious hooks on the ceiling. All while singing "The Dead Body Man" by ICP. Best Regards, Your Favorite Serial Killer, Mrs. Charles Lee Ray"

My Response:
Dear Mrs. Charles Lee Ray,


Ghost of Beethoven

P.S. It's wannabe-juggalos/juggalettes like you that make the genius of ICP look like a joke to the rest of the world.

Author: -XcarlieX- (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1819689/)
Words of Stupidity: I thank you for your review. harsh maybe but completely down to freedom of spech. This little flaming session has inspired me, so please keep reading and reviewing a story you hate Report it some more I'm not that bothered. Your times being wasted. My emo outburst was that an emo outburst and im actually laughing at it my self, I was annoyed now I'd didn't realise people that much without a social life exsisted. Finding your little statment really gave me a laugh so please continue! God klnows I could do with it. Actually one of your little friends posted that outburt on his/her page. Which resulted in ALOT more people reading it. You people seem to be under the impression that our works(the people that you flame) actually care. Its a WEBSITE! not reality, I believe you are the confused one. A few sucky words about a crappy story that I don't care if gets taken down from a bunch of sado's telling me how much I suck at writing. Hahaha, really funny.I do you post this on your own site with the rest. I will give you something to do. thank you for honestly making my day and please tell all you our flamers, I'm looking forward to wasting their obviously valuable time. PFFT. HAVE A NICE DAY!(OH NO CAPITALS, GRRR!)

My Response:
Dear -XcarlieX-,

I highly doubt that the reason you decided to take down that non-storychapter had anything to do with you realizing how much an "emo outburst" it was. If that were true, you would have taken it down when "flameplz" had responded to it. You took it down to save face, and probably with the hope that it would remove our flames at the same time.

Your "logic" and "understanding" equals that of a mental patient or a rabid rat, my dear. If they don’t, then you surely act like they do.

For one, I don't believe for one instant that you're eighteen (or nineteen, as you've suddenly changed it in your profile). It can't be possible that a sane, legal adult would act like a six-year-old little girl throwing a public tantrum after being denied a new toy. If it IS possible, then you should know that you are a disgrace to your age group and that you are insulting another UK individual on this site who is merely SIXTEEN and has the maturity level of three times that. Not to mention, her work is truly spectacular. I even hear that she is working on a book with the intentions of publishing it. You can't even dare to say the same, can you? You, who can't even follow simply-formed rules or write in proper story format rather than chat/script format (also against the rules and have been reported for).

There is something not quite right with you. You're a very mentally unstable and it shows in your work and how you conduct yourself with others. Not to mention that your attempt to sound intelligent has fallen way off its mark.

Yes, this IS a website. Which resides in reality. Not in your fantasy land, where little Carlie can get away with anything and everything she does, especially breaking any and all of the rules, and not even get a slap on the wrist. In reality, however, you are required to follow those rules that you enjoy ignoring. You are no more special than anyone else here, despite how much you clearly think otherwise.

You should also know that bluffing with things like "I'm leaving these flames up so everyone can see how much a dumb@ss you are" makes us more experienced members laugh, for you clearly haven't realized (or maybe you have?) that you can't remove signed reviews unless you actually delete the whole story. We flamers know this site like the back of our hands, and for you to assume that you do as well is outrageously hilarious. If anyone is having a good time here, it's us. We are masters at creating games around your mind, constantly experimenting and seeing what words will bring about which reactions and vice versa.

For most, we're here to help. For the few like you, we're here to have fun.

Fatality of Mortality

P.S. Until you can at least MATCH your maturity level with your supposed age level, please stay in your own country. We Americans have much bigger problems to deal with than to have childish nineteen-year-olds coming over here and giving us more grief.

P.P.S. I am immune to blocking, my dear.

Author: Heartstones (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1845263/)
Words of Stupidity: Fatality of Mortality, You have no life at all, if all you do is flame selected people for their bad grammar and storylines. I haven't written a story, but you've flamed stories that I've liked. If you can't see past your own nose and actually know what humor is, then I sugested you stop being a fucking retard, think about the people you're hurting and getting a life with real friends that you can tell your problems to. Really, it will seriously help if you get off that high pedistal you call 'natural talent', and realise that not everyone can be as smart as you. Do you enjoy hurting people? Think a bit before you answer that queation. Heartstones.

My Response:
Dear Heartstones,

I need to inform you that the opinions of a biased little twit who wouldn't know quality writing if it slapped her across the face are not taken seriously by me. You're thirteen and probably haven't read anything outside the Twilight and Harry Potter fandoms. If you did, you would have realized that Twilight, itself, is a piece of shit.

I would also like to point out that you don't have to be a genius to write lovely work. If you believe otherwise, then you are a dipshit, my dear.

With that said, I would also like to say that you are a dumbass, period, for assuming that I flamed those stories because of their quality. If you had actually READ what I said in my flames rather than immediately jump to conclusions at the first curse word you saw, you would have noticed that I flamed her because she was breaking the rules by posting non-story chapters.

Please mind your own business if you can't even get your facts straight.

Fatality of Mortality.

Author: Erica Snape (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1650987/)
Words of Stupidity: if you are such a smart ass then were is your story? or are you afraid that nobody will like it?

My Response:
Dear Erica Snape,

I must inform you that trolling me with your ignorance is unacceptable. You have been blocked. I understand that it might be dreadfully difficult for you to spare a few minutes of your busy life to do so, but please, actually read what's in my profile before you go bothering me and wasting my time with your low-leveled intelligence.

Fatality of Mortality.

Author: ginny'snumber1fan (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1777370/)
Words of Stupidity:
okay, i am fine with flaming in reviews. you are so ignorant, and then you accuse other people of being ignorant! ever heard the phrase...don't like don't read? you should take that advice, unless flaming is your only hobby.

My Response:
Dear ginny'snumber1fan,

I apologize for your incompetence and the lacking ability to at least sound intelligent. I ask that you please refrain from bothering me further with your childish ignorance if this is the best you can offer. The "don't like, don't read" argument shows me just how shallow your reasoning is as well as gives me an idea of your mental capacity. It's not flattering.

You've read my profile and I'm assuming you've read my flames, and clearly they bother you, so allow me to speak in your own words: If you don't like it, don't read it.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: ginny'snumber1fan (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1777370/)
Words of Stupidity: you're a jerk, enough said.

My Response:
Dear ginny'snumber1fan,

You have been declared a troll by resorting to immature, pitiful responses to a fight you initiated. "You're a jerk" - What are you, five? Grow up, kid. Don't pick fights with those who are obviously more intelligent than you. You have been blocked for wasting my time.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: nothing for nothing 1 (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1509409/)
Words of Stupidity: I'm flaming you for flaming other pepole.
Number 1: I'm giving you a dose of your own medicine. Let's see how you like
getting flamed.
Number 2: Just because you don't have a life does not mean you can just bop
with pepole whenever you want.
Number 3: You don't derserve good reviews. I will never give you a good
review because you don't give good reviews enough.
Number 4: I hate your story. You can just get over it because your so-called
flamer friends can just get a life. I give you a one fat star because your
story is stinky.
Number 5: Don't you dare flame my fics or i will report your butt to
fanfiction. Your sorry fat flamer head will be as sad as a big pile of trash.
Number 6: Your stories stink like garbage. What did you have to join
fanfiction for? Go back to english class and learn your head off. And don't
ever write your garbage again and leave us alone, you fat butt-head hardcore

My Response:
Dear nothing for nothing 1,

You have been marked as an obnoxious troll in need of friends and more love from Mommy. Please grow up and find your purpose in life. Being a wannabe flamer by using a "copy and paste" flame against someone better than you with its contents ragging on stories I don't even possesses is proof that you're mentally retarded. Please enroll in Special Ed before you hurt yourself by thinking too hard. :)

Fatality of Mortality.

Author: I troll with flamers (nothing for nothing 1) (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1509409/)
Words of Stupidity: You remember me? I was only pretending to be sorry. Let's jsut say that you need to stop babbling about your sockpuppets, trying to showoff. No one gives a shit about your sockpuppets. Hi, my name is Fatality of Mortality, and I have no life at all, and everyone rejects me. Sucks to be you, ne, ugly poohead?

My Response:
Dear I troll with flamers,

You have been blocked for being a waste of my time and a complete annoyance. I suggest that you please get some help because your mental instability and utter incompetence are getting on my nerves, and for you to believe that you are actually a force to be reckoned with is hilarious at best.

Fatality of Mortality

P.S. I apologize for using so many big words. I know how difficult it is for you to understand them, but unlike you, my intelligence is just too great to be controlled.

Author: Screw You Flamers The Second (nothing for nothing 1) (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1946862/)
Words of Stupidity: Hi, there. You thought you could block me? Well, think again. This is my sockpuppet accont, and thier's nothing you can do to get rid of me. Everytime you block me, I will create another sockpuppet. How do you like those apples?

My Response:
Dear Screw You Flamers The Second,

It takes maybe ten minutes to go through the process of creating a new e-mail to create a new account on this site, and then to find me and e-mail me a message that I just delete after I'm done using it.

At the same time, it only takes me ten seconds to copy and paste your account's ID number into the Block User box and hit the button. By all means, spend your clearly bored life creating new accounts over and over again. You're doing nothing that would ruin my life. The difficulty level of dealing with your obnoxiousness is non-existent.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: White-Rose09 (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1969783/)

My Response:
Dear White-Rose09,

Your PM sent to my main account, Fatality of Mortality, shows just how immature you are. The abuse of the capslock key and explanation marks are used only by those who are so unintelligent that they're unable to express their emotions through larger words and wit.

Please refrain from harassing me with your stupidity. I don't waste my debate skills on ignorant children.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: Unique Cullen o.O (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1798390/)
Words of Stupidity: YOU NEED TO GROW UP, she does not put authors notes througout the story only at beggining and end. and there are other words out there instead of sware words, because there are very young children on this site, you for example, GROW UP!

My Response:
Dear Unique Cullen o.O,

For one, please improve your ability to spell before you decide to argue with someone more intelligent than you. "Througout" is "throughout", "beggining" is "beginning", and "sware" is "swear".

And please, don't try to fight me on the rules of this site because you're only making yourself look like more of an idiot.

In my review, I copied and pasted the rules directly from the site's guidelines. Of course one can put notes at the beginning and end of each chapter because it says you can, dumbshit.

If you had actually pulled your head of your ass and read more carefully (but I'm assuming your reading skills equal that of your writing skills), it said author notes are "never (to be) as individual chapters." Your drama whore author has broken this rule multiple times, including telling people of her 'current stats', which are laughable, and then crying about the flames.

If this is all you can offer me as a fight, then please, go back to your hole and mind your own business like you should be doing. I profoundly hope that your boast about "being at war" with two flamers doesn't include me because you're ridiculous, as are your attempts to insult me.

Come back when you have something that isn't at troll-level intelligence. Until then, don't waste my time.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: Unique Cullen o.O (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1798390/)
Words of Stupidity: those author notes as chapters is to say SORRY FOR NOT UPDATEING READERS THE

My Response:
Dear Unique Cullen o.O,

. . . Your absolute incompetence is offensive beyond belief. My dear, that's what the goddamn PM system is for, as well as her fucking profile. If she is so worried about her readers throwing a fit about her lack of updates, then she should send a note to everyone who has reviewed it/favorite it/put it on alert (or, if there are readers who are truly concerned, they will message HER). If she doesn't want to do that, then she should do what every other author does and just put a note in her profile. I promise you, little girl, anyone who truly gives two shits about her 'story' and why it hasn't been updated will go there and look.

Now, allow me to explain why it's against the damn rules to put author notes as separate chapters: it's unfair to the fandom's other authors and it's deceiving to those who have been waiting for real updates.

Everyone deserves maximum spotlight time on the front page because they worked hard to earn it with their new chapter (though not Miss Clair Cullen and anyone else who writes in script format - it takes little talent to write just dialogue), but if everyone thought like you and your selfish bitch friend, then no one would have even an HOUR on the first page of any fandom because everyone would be 'updating' their stories with author notes, pushing down onto the next pages the stories that have been updated with actual chapters.

Not to mention, people who have been waiting (and possibly for a long time) to read the next installment of a story feel cruelly deceived, their hopes and excitement up high when they see that it's updated, only to learn that it was just an author's note as to why the author is basically taking their sweet ass time updating.

Anything else that you would like to be thoroughly educated on?

Fatality of Mortality

Author: Unique Cullen o.O (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1798390/)
AGRADECIDO USTED DON' T ME CONOCE PERSONALMENTE!! good day, or should i say encima el suyo más flojo Unique Cullen o.O P.S. encima el suyo más flojo means UP YOURS LOOSER!

My Response:
Dear Unique Cullen o.O,

Vous n'êtes pas le seul l'un qui peut parler une langue différente, enfant stupide.

Grow up, brat. I've every right to call you 'little' because that sums up everything about you: you have little intelligence, little common sense, little maturity, little reasoning and little respect for spelling. "Looser" only has one 'o', fucktard.

You have now been blocked for being a waste of my precious time. I've other things to do than to put up with your silly tantrums. Getting offended for being called 'little' is hilarious in spite of everything else that I have used as insults. Either you are looking for any excuse to back out of this because you clearly underestimated me, or you're so outrageously stupid that 'little girl' was the only thing you could comprehend in my past replies.

Fatality of Mortality

Anonymous: On Your Side (http://www.fanfiction.net/r/4948621/2/1/)
Words of Stupidity: Interesting. Interesting. Fatality of Mortality seems to be a slight variation of the typical flamer. You'll have to be on the look-out for their type from now on. Obviously, they’ve yet to write a single fic, but still feel entitled to dish out insults and foul language to other authors. In addition, they’ve failed to notice that you didn’t name the name(s) of any or all flamers. You could have received the flames via PM.

Ignore or report this uninformed/abusive fool (who is unfortunately one of many) and carry on with the story.

My Response:
It is clearly unfortunate that in this world, dipshits will encourage others to also be dipshits. All I can say is that while I may not have a story to show that I am capable of using basic grammar (though I would think that those who possess even a pinch of intelligence would notice that I can due to my well-written reviews), at least I'm registered with an account one can respond to, rather than being a coward and hiding behind the Anonymous status where one can't give you a proper ass kicking for your ignorance. :)

Also, no flamer sends their flames via PM. How moronic and uniformed you are, On Your Side. It is obvious you didn't read her A/N thoroughly, nor did you bother to actually read past my real flame to see the other comments. She quoted things from the reviews of her critics, which she calls her 'flamers'. In short, I know who and what she's talking about, and you are just speaking out of your ass. Please keep your stupidity to yourself from now on.

Author: JadeTarma (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/38672/)
Words of Stupidity:
If you are, truly, a 'good' critiquer, and not just an avid flamer, then I challenge you to prove it. Write something, a story, either true or fiction. Prove that you do actually know what you are talking about. In your profile, I saw plenty of favorite authors, but not a piece of work that was written yourself. I firmly believe that one cannot offer truly constructive criticism unless one has actually written a piece of work oneself (pages of picking at another author's works do not count). ~JadeTarma

My Response:
Dear JadeTarma,

Allow me to first inform you that "critiquer" is not a word. It's "critic" in the sense that you wanted to use.

Also allow me to inform that I have written something for the Transformers/Beast Wars fandom back when scienceteacherSE had nothing else to use against me except for the simple fact that my account was absent of fanfiction, but I had made the decision to not submit it. All I would receive would be biased reviews. (Example: You. You're going to be looking specifically for errors rather than enjoying the story, so what is the point? I don't purposely seek out horrible fiction. I just happen across them and therefore if I think it's bad, I will exercise my right to tell the author exactly that.)

I don't wish to put her down now because we are finally on agreeable terms with things, but I will tell you the same thing that I've kept telling scienceteacherSE: I don't need to write a story to prove that I can do just that: write. I am allowed to voice my opinions on any story here, whether I'm encouraging, neutral, harsh or flaming, without needing to back myself up, just as I am allowed to voice my opinion on a film or someone's cooking skills. Do you mean to tell me that you can't say a movie sucked because you, yourself, haven't produced one yet? Or that you're not allowed to be a food critic until you've created a certain dish perfectly yourself?

Do understand how ignorant and blatantly stupid you are, yet? Because that's the logic you're trying to use here - one can't ever be opinionated unless they can create something similar and better.

Come back when you've something more original to use against me, and I implore you, try to come up with something that hasn't already been thoroughly explained in my profile.

Fatality of Mortality

P.S. Those who are on my Favorite Authors list are not there because they've written something I've enjoyed (most of them have blank accounts as well). They're there because they are either flamers, critics, or people who support me. Maybe you should have visited a few of them to figure out such a simple, common link.

Author: JadeTarma (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/38672/)
Words of Stupidity:
Dear Fatality of Mortality,

I apologize, as I had not seen your first review of "Mary, Quite Contrary." And, no, I am not "On Your Side." When I review, I always either am signed in or at least leave my pen name so that the author has a chance of finding me to contact me if necessary.

As for "Mary, Quite Contrary," I originally read it over on MariaShadow's live journal where the formatting separating the paragraphs looked fine to me. I had no problems following the story, nor telling when different characters were speaking. So the clumping that you pointed out, I think, is more the result of an ongoing problem here on FF.N. I've experienced this formatting problem myself (everything looked just fine in Word, but looked like crap after I uploaded it), and I've seen many authors complain about it as well.

However, I do object to the name-calling that many flamers use. I understand that you will disagree on this point, but I find calling people ignorant, stupid, or any variation there of both rude and offensive, and often counterproductive. If that makes me thin-skinned, then so be it.


My Response:
Dear JadeTarma,

Blaming the poor formatting on the site is a pathetic excuse and one I refuse to acknowledge as a pass.

One, if it truly is the site's fault (which I doubt it is - it is probably with converting certain files from certain programs because with livejournal, you have to copy and paste the story whereas you have to upload the file here), then it's not something so major that every other story here is suffering from it and in which case is not an issue so severe that the staff wouldn't have immediately tried to fix already.

Two, there is a tool called "Live Preview", where it shows you immediately and exactly how the story looks on the site before it's ever loaded into the fandom. This is meant to be used to catch and correct any mistakes such as haywire emphasizing (where the chapter might have ended up in all bold or italics), bad formatting and spacing, noticeable grammar/spelling errors, etc.

Three, even after being notified that there was something wrong with the formatting, MariaShadow has yet to fix it and has even had the audacity to pass it off as something "they're taught in New Zealand" where scienceteacherSE has gone back, researched it and found it to be a lie.

So please, my dear, don't make excuses for a lazy author. I know this site and how it functions very well. MariaShadow deserves everything she gets at this point because she's a little snot who can't turn down con-crit maturely and has to make a big deal out of it and spew out lies. So, I refuse to be 'productive' with such a person.

Fatality of Mortality

P.S. You may find name-calling offensive, but I find lazy and arrogant authors offensive. We can leave it at that.

Author: ChaosHex (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1017768/)
Words of Stupidity:
Wow for such an interesting name you do like to talk a lot of shit.

Are you compensaiting for some deep emortional scar, or are you the arrogant reperessed, stressed bitch you love to appear as? Let me give you a tip get laid; you deffinatly need it!

What is with the whole I'd be stupid to post under this name, well if your not courageous enough to post your own work in the forum of your own making your a coward.

As for the bad spelling and grammar, not everyone absorbed the ditionary and memorises book on the construction of a sentance. Yeh i disslike the spelling errors and grammar mistakes, yet litracy has this niffty idea called constructive critacism, you may want to try it after you have been laid. Just a thought, since I don't your Nobel prize. You probably have studied the works of william shakespere at school at some point. You know the dead english dude from elizabethan england. He is accredited for bad grammar, spelling and ten's of made up words yet we reguard him as one of the best writers of all time...

As for my own work if you want have at it, its all old and I will rellish anything you can dish out. Might be nice to hear a new point of view.

Oh and before you reach for your moral soap box I was merely browsing authors names and looking at the cool ones. Yours is the title of a poem by bipolar friend wrote to pass his A levels. Thought it could be interesting to see what you loked to read... I found an arrogant represed blatant challenge. After all if you think your that good you wont mind a little return for such a colourful profile.

One last thought for some one who likes their english you may want to chand yor wording from 'Fucktard' makes you seem imature as well as angry, atleast use a vocabulary to back up all those strong words of yours.

caio Chasohex

My Response:
Dear ChaosHex,

Because my time is limited these days, I'm going to make this quick, though with your limited intelligence, this will probably be a waste anyway.

It is very obvious that some people 'don't absorb the dictionary' because you are clearly one of those said people. However, you should know that this site provides a unique tool called "the spellchecker". It's quite amazing, really.

It corrects your spelling errors.

Unbelievable, isn't it?

Also, along with your inability to use a simple spellchecker, you don't seem to know basic grammar, either, especially certain punctuation, including the comma ( , ), the semi-colon ( ; ), or colon ( : ).

In the end, you are an audacious little twit for even DARING to reprimand me on ANYTHING when you cannot even spell your own user name right.

Please take your ignorance elsewhere because I only explain my reasoning behind flaming to those who are at least of average intellect and have some ounce of common sense. Based on your PM, you haven't met such simple requirements.

P.S. Here are your spelling and grammar corrections:
compensaiting (compensating)
emortional (emotional)
reperessed (repressed)
deffinatly (definitely)
ditionary (dictionary)
memorises (memorizes/memorized)
sentance (sentence)
Yeh i disslike (Yes/Yeah/Yea, I dislike)
litracy (literacy – though, in this sentence, it's 'literature')
critacism (criticism – please do not give me lessons on con-crit when you can't even spell the word)
william shakespere (William Shakespeare)
elizabethan england (Elizabethan England)
reguard (regard)
rellish (relish)
loked (liked)
represed (repressed – I enjoyed how you spelled this word two different ways, and each time was incorrect)
english (English)
chand yor (change your)
imature (immature)
atleast (at least)
Chasohex (ChaosHex)

Stay in school, dumbshit. You 'deffinatly' need it.

Author: ChaosHex (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1017768/)
Words of Stupidity: "Ohh sorry sugah, dont mean to intrude on your on your bitching.

Some of us have something called ADHD my particular type means that my spelling and grammar arn't quite perfect: and you will find that their isn't a spellchecker on a PM. You my need to brush up on your computer skills there. Also please don't correct my english spellings you do realise that they are more correct than the distorted americanism that you corrected too.

Still think you need to get laid though!!

May help your angar issues and abrasive personality.

Try to work on your grammar and punctuation also because no matter whick side of the Atlantic you are on "you don't seem to know basic grammar, either, especially certain punctuation," does not work you have an extra comma between grammar and either. Any other way and your flow is all wrong. William Sakesphere and Oxford university are either and example off, or have studied the art of the English language. They tell us that no matter what the content of your writting as long as you have propper punctuation and flow even the worst spelling ever can be accepted.

For your refrence my user name is only capitalised in the middle to ephisise and the true actual spelling is Chaoshex as cited by the British museam and Bambridge Scollars in refrence to the cures upon the temple of Sekhesh, Abydos. If you even realise who that is with your limited scope of the world.

As for school I'm in the top percentile and achiving a first. Thanks for your support.

You may want to actually spell your swear words, to do otherwise is quite childish.

oh i wonder if you learn to spell in english would you mind cheacking my essays over you seem to be quite good at it."

My Response:
Dear ChaosHex,

You seem to have a fixation with my sex life. Are you attracted to my 'arrogance'? Sorry, my dear, but I'm happily taken. And my libido is satisfied nearly every night. Thanks for your concern though. :)

As for being "ADHD" . . . unless you have a parasite eating your brain, there's no reason for you to not spell better than a seven-year-old unless you didn't get the proper education or you just don't give a shit. A few mistakes might be one thing, but this is ridiculous. If you're so weak that you have to defend your shortcomings with something that a good portion of the human population has, some more severe than others, then you need to know that I don't believe such a bullsht story that you are "in the top percentile and achiving a first". You cannot have it both ways.

And please, don't talk to me about how this site works when you clearly don't know that there is a profanity filter that prevents swearing and crude words, thus I have to use the "" to get around said filter. Some people have theirs turned off, but most don't, so I just generalize that everyone has their filter turned on. Also, you need to get out past this site and learn a few things yourself, such as figuring out that there are internet browsers, including Mozilla Firefox and Safari, that have an automatic spellchecker built into them when you type.

The commas before and after "either" are correct seeing as it was used in the form of "as well" and "too", and correct grammar asks that you bracket those in commas when they're interrupting the flow of a sentence.

I don't know what you're on, my dear, but you are living in a time where English, grammar and syntax have changed dramatically, and it's still evolving. We are taught to read and write a certain way just as Shakespeare was taught another in his lifetime.

Intelligence is based on your common sense and ability to communicate properly. Current correct spelling and grammar is proper communication.

And you seem to have skipped over the fact that you still misspelled your own username. I didn't ask to know the meaning behind it, nor did I ever give you the impression that I care as to why you "captialise" the 'h' in hex. It has nothing to do with your issues with me or my issues with your ignorance.

So, instead of trying to impress me with sht you're interested in and trying to fashion the idea that because I'm not interested in the same things, it must mean I'm incompetent, actually understand that you're an idiot.

Fatality of Mortality

your an idoit for believing me in the first place i dont care anymore. i am
not getting this site kicked off the internet anymore. i dont about what your

Author: The Real Mrs. Optimus Prime (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2180032/)
Words of Stupidity:
hay I Did not tell my friend to right you she did that her self But you must under stand that it's a story that is just a story and it's not real !! People right things like this all the time, But i am not trying to be mean. But we have a right too wright any thing we want !! But hun my real name is Bonita Prime and i only think of Optimus as a husband in a fantcy that's it... And if you don't care if you don't like me or my story then stay off my page and leave me alone and Pleaes take me Off your Profile... that is all i ask...Thank You for your time and i am sorry you didn't like my story...THE REAL MRS. OPTIMUS PRIME...

My Response:
Dear The Real Mrs. Optimus Prime,

You've the right to write whatever you want, but once you post it here, a public site.. it's everyone's game. I've the right to speak my opinion of your writing skills and the content of your story, and both are absolutely terrible. You can't even muster the ability to use correct grammar and spelling in your reply to me.

Leave you alone? Stay off your page? My dear, grow up. I've been told that you've received 'flames' and concrit before, but you keep deleting your stories and ignoring the advice handed to you. This is what you get for being a stupid and arrogant and why the only review you have now is mine.

If you can't handle being told the honest, brutal truth, then stay away from this fandom. Even more, this site.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: The Real Mrs. Optimus Prime (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2180032/)
Words of Stupidity:
Look the reason i deted the stories is i was editing them and replaced them and I am not geting off of there and to let you know ( Mrs. Optimus Prime is my friend) and I well leave you along...thank you for your time , The Real Mrs. Optimus Prime out...

My Response:
Dear The Real Mrs. Optimus Prime,

Do not lie to me. I am not at your level of idiocy to believe such obvious bullshit.

One: If the story you have up truly was a 'rewrite', then your skills are more horrific than I'd thought.

Two: "The Real Mrs. Optimus Prime is more of an aquantince to me than a friend. We have talked a couple of times but I never saw her more than an aquantince, she said she wanted to be friends. As she has said we are friends I have never felt we really were." - Mrs. Optimus Prime.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: Bumble Bee's wife (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1344396/)
Words of Stupidity:
Ok listen. You need to stop wat your doing and leave other ppl alone. I read one of your reviews that my friend linked me. You just need to grow up and smell the roses. These stories arent real. They are just want ppl want to write down. They arent ment to be real. If you dont stop i will see to it that Fanfiction is kicked off the internet. I will make sure that the ppl on here will blame u for getting it on the internet. If you dont stop i will also get the law involved. You know wat...ppl like you make me sick casue you are making fun of ppls stories. They worked hard on making these stories, and ppl like you have to ruin it for others. I tell you wat. If i hear that you did this to other ppl, i will make sure that Fanfiction is kicked off the internet and you will be the blame.

My Response:
Please tell The Real Mrs. Optimus Prime to confront me herself and to keep her annoying, yappy pet securely locked up in its kennel and hidden away in the basement. It's embarrassing her, giving people the impression that she's a coward and can't stand up for herself.

Thank you.

Fatality of Mortality

P.S. -You'll- be kicked off the Internet long before this site ever sees a similar fate. However, if you're able to pull it off, I will only thank you. A fresh remaking with stricter rules and vigilant administrators is what this forsaken place needs.

P.P.S. Notice how I was able to spell 'people' correctly. Take notes.

Author: Bumble Bee's Wife (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1344396/)
Words of Stupidity:
I will tell them not to take it if...if you stop telling people that they cant write stories. The Real Mrs. Optimus Prime didnt tell me to write it i read it and wrote you. I know what your doing, and its not right. Just tell me that you will stop telling people they cant write and i wont get Fanfiction taken off.

My Response:

Dear Bumble Bee's Wife,

I've the right to speak my opinion. If you or your friend don't like it, then please take your boo-hooing elsewhere.

Fatality of Morality.

Author: Bumble Bee's Wife (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1344396/)
Words of Stupidity:
I dont care if you want to do anything you want. But the stories people write ARE NOT REAL!! Get it through your head. People write them casue they want to. You might not care if it hurts them but they do. I will repeat the stories ARE NOT REAL.

My Response:
Dear Bumble Bee's wife,

I apologize. It would appear your intelligence doesn't seem to sit much higher than your friend's. You see, there is -nothing- simple about writing, especially when it comes to fanfiction. If you consider writing easy, then chances are your work is between sh/t and mediocre.

When it comes to fanfiction, there are many rules you must follow, both written and unwritten (but understood by any respectable author):

1) You must use proper grammar, spelling and syntax (an actual site RULE/GUIDELINE). Please try finding for me a published author where their books read like they're illiterate. You won't. But your friend clearly is.

2) Plot. Your friend's story is so cliché it is actually painful. This is how the plot basically goes: Human girl gets hurt; human girl's future romance interest rescues her and human girl falls in love; human girl gets turned into a cybertronian by unknown reasons and love interest falls in love with smitten girl; they confess their love to one another; both get married; they have a baby and live happily ever after.

And here's the punchline! The author you keep trying to defend did ALL OF THIS... in three, not-so-long chapters. And they were terribly written chapters at that, including bad grammar, misspellings, unrealistic and flat dialogue, and improper paragraph structure.

3) Canon. Your friend RAPES everything canon in her Mary-Sue self-insert about Optimus Prime, and even the other characters who were unfortunately brought into the 'storyline'. I am all for human/cybertronian romance fics, but not if everything that makes up a character's personality is tossed out to follow the plotline the author created for her OC. It's supposed to be the other way around.
- The Autobots do not have, or have any need, for human currency (money), but if anything, they use 'credits' or even energon as a way of currency in their own culture.
- They're robots. They don't 'blush'.
- 'Girlfriend'. This is a completely different race, more intelligent and advanced than our own. 'Girlfriend' would not be in their vocabulary, especially coming from one as mature as Optimus. MAYBE Bumblebee, because he's so young.

So.. has your minimal intelligence grasped what I'm saying? Probably not.

I flame people because, yes, "OMG DAT IZ NOT RITE!! OPTIMUS WOULD NEVAR DO DAT!!1!".. not because I ever thought this fandom was real... but because Optimus truly NEVER would do that.

Fanfiction is not the same as original fiction, dumb@ss. If she wants to write about human/robots falling in love with robots and not even bothering to use the canon already provided for her.. then she needs to write an original story and toss it over at Fictionpress(.)com.

Get it through your head, please. I know more about this fandom and how it should go more than you ever will, and I will not change what I do because YOU don't like it. You seem to have it in your mind that you're more important than everyone else here and that I should listen to you no matter what.

Please busy yourself with kicking this site off the Internet like you kept threatening me you would do. I'm still waiting.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: Bumble Bee's Wife (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1344396/)
Words of Stupidity:
Ok listen. i am not going to get fanfiction kicked off...i just want you to stop hurting people. The Real Mrs. Optimus Prime is redoing her story. And thats what it is A STORY!! Its not real and never will be. Just get it through your head they are STORIES. There not real. They are just stories that people want to wirte. You just have to get it through your head they ARE STORIES NOT REAL. Your just one of those people who like to hurt people. Just think of it this way if i wanted to i could hack you page and get you kicked off. I will if i have to. Now stop telling people they cant write.

My Response:
Dear Bumble Bee's Wife,

You have been blocked for being an obnoxious little child, repeating yourself over and over after I just explained that I realize this fandom is not real, but you must go by its canon or you might as well be writing an original story. You are also blocked for continuing to stick to your massive threat of having the ability to kick this website off the whole Internet, but at the same time you still haven't proved you can and you are actually backing out of it after realizing you underestimated me. You've already been told that it is no skin off my nose if you can pull it off; that I would actually appreciate it if you did.

So therefore, I will continue what I do as I've been doing it for nearly three years, and so long as I've authors supporting me and my reviewing tactics, I will always tell myself that what I'm doing is right and for the better good of this forsaken place.

I'm doing this for the authors who respect their fandoms and respect the art of composing a story. Putting trolls like you in your place is simply a bonus.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: Bumble Bee's Wife (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1344396/)
Words of Stupidity:
your an idoit for believing me in the first place i dont care anymore. i am not getting this site kicked off the internet anymore. i dont about what your doing.

My Response:
I didn't believe you. That's the point, you little dipshit. Try picking fights with those who write PMs as illiterate as yours. You won't win against anyone who can structure sentences properly. :)

Author: OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23 (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2253454/)
Words of Stupidity:
Get one thing straight before you go shooting off your mouth to me get your damn facts straight! First off I am a writer I have three books out magazine articles an e-book and I have a book being made into a movie. Now, these little fan fictions are just that little stupid stories because I like the Transformers. I could care a less about what you think about the fan fiction story but when you start putting me down personally get a clue. Go to my blog all my books are listed there and next time ENGAGE YOUR BRAIN BEFORE OPENING YOUR MOUTH AND PUTTING YOUR FOOT IN IT. Do not and I mean EVER try to embarrass or cause a problem with my stories anymore because your tiny little opinions are starting to annoy me greatly.

My Response:
Dear OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23,

I do not care if you have a planet named after you. I refuse to allow you to disgrace the true professional writers by assuming you can slack off here. You know nothing about writing fanfiction because it is completely different from writing original fiction.

There is a complex thing called "canon" in the fanfiction community, something your simple-mindedness has yet to recognize.

I saw your blog, kid, and it means nothing to me after seeing the shit you put on this site. After all, if you would submit pieces like that, where it reads like you never passed fourth grade, then your original work can't be that far off: Boring with little detail, flat characters and unrealistic dialogue and emotion.

Anyone can get their shit published.

Doesn't mean you can actually write.

You should also know that I didn't find you on my own. I had people send me a link to your profile, requesting that I give you a reality check, which you so dearly needed. So I'm not the only one here who feels the same way about you.

Only one who needs to get a clue is you. Keep you crap off this site until you can actually learn how to write and to stop exaggerating yourself. You're not a professional writer until you can fucking write like one.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23 (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2253454/)
Words of Stupidity:
First off that pairing was the only one I did with the actual humans from the movie the others I did were with my own characters and I had the reviews of people who liked them. So flatly kiss off if I want to write a story with The Transformers I fully intend to do it SO BACK OFF and shut your mouth about my work professionally you know absolutely dick about me and my books. You need to get a clue I am no kid as you so stupidity put. Since I am new to this particular site keep YOUR mouth shut. I was going for something completely different in that story and also to answer your remark that anyone can get their stuff published no that's not true only someone who pays to have their work published can get ANYTHING published. I did not have the money for that when I started as a writer I got in because my work was good not because it was lame or sucked whatever it was you said. Since you never read my books SHUT IT - Since one of them is being made into a movie then that means it was liked and since the paperback has been now made into hardback means its reached the highest peak to be changed from paperback to hardback. So do not attack me without your facts you low class little glitch unless you know exactly what your talking about. And if, I want to write a Transformers fan fiction I will do so so basically what I am saying to your feeble mind is LAY OFF! I noticed you copy and pasted the letter on your profile tell me something who the hell are you that you think you have the right to tear apart anyone stories. This is FICTION people can create any type of story using their imagination that's the whole idea SO BACK OFF!

My Response:
Dear OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23,

I apologize. It would seem you missed the whole issue in my flame where I brought up how you didn't even use correct grammar, spelling, and syntax in your story. A professional writer would understand the very basics of the English language. Not you, of course. You can't even use correct grammar in your username. You even have missing commas and periods in this message. Disgusting.

"... also to answer your remark that anyone can get their stuff published no that's not true only someone who pays to have their work published can get ANYTHING published."

Based on the shit I read, you're either lying to me when you say you didn't have any money.. or you're still exaggerating to the maximum because being 'new' to this site is not an excuse for your pathetic writing. Your 'talent' doesn't just take a hiatus when you start writing fanfiction. You utilize what you have, and this is what I saw: no knowledge in canon, and the work was flat and boring.

Your work is mediocre. Describing it as 'good' is probably pushing along lie. I don't have to read your books to know this based on what I read.

Twilight was a horrible series and yet it's published. Your argument means little compared to what you actually published here.

You shouldn't listen to those who give you asspats. Most of the time their opinions are biased and/or they don't know quality work when they see it.

I know quality when I see it, and I didn't see it here.

Fatality of Mortality

P.S. Empty, childish demands like "keep my mouth shut" and "back off" make me laugh. Grow up.

P.P.S. When did I EVER ... flame you on the 'plot' of your story? I didn't. I flamed you on your terrible grammar and your ignorance when it comes to canon. This is not fiction, little girl, where you so stupidly think anything goes. This is FANfiction. Fiction is original work. Here, good fanfiction follows reasonable canon in the fandom. If we didn't want canon, then we would be reading your damn books. You failed at writing good fanfiction.

Author: OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23 (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2253454/)
Words of Stupidity:
Okay miss I am better than everyone else and can flame anybody and 'think she can get away with it' (which by the way you can't) First off, get a clue stop calling me little girl or stupid jack ass remarks like you made. My books are published by a top notch publisher, I also have an editor and everything to go with it including an agent. I also notice your quick to start bullshit but you yourself haven't written a damn thing let's see could that be because either your afraid of flames yourself? Or let's see perhaps your lacking in the story telling department knowing how much you talk shit it's probably both. Now, understand one thing I will be writing Transformers stories regardless of what you say because pretty much your words and put downs don't mean a whole hell of a lot to me. Oh and one more thing I did not have a planet named after me LUNASTAR is my pen name for that fantasy series it's Italian for Little Moon. You know, I have had a lot of REAL reviewers who loved my Real work and a few negative ones which I can accept because not everyone likes different tastes. What I find completely rude and not necessary are people like you; who think they can tear down others by their words I have seen you do it to other writers and quite frankly I find you obnoxious and condescending.You think you have the right to say whatever you like and you don't; your not even a paid reviewer your so wanna be who has hurt several people on this site. People who I know personally and are friends with and myself frankly I am not hurt I am pissed and that my dear was where you made your mistake. After this last letter do not attempt to write back or review any of my work because I will block your sorry ass.

My Response:
Dear OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23,

I will use whatever name I wish when talking to you. If I want to call you 'ignorant snagglesnatch', I will. But I haven't reached that point yet. Right now, you're just being a bratty child, thinking you can make me change my mind and apologize to you all because you have a few unknown books published out there. And yes, I CAN flame anyone I want. But I don't. I just flame the shit-writers, rule breakers, and trolls. Would you like to know which category you fall in, or can you manage the answer on your own?

'Top notch publisher' ... I highly doubt it. As for having an 'editor' and 'agent': so do most others. You do not impress me, kid. You should stop trying before you hurt yourself. You ruined yourself by that sh/t you submitted here. What, did you think we'd let you slack off all because you have a couple of books out there? Or were you just half-assing it 'cause you were just trying to promote yourself? If you were, then you obviously made a poor choice in promoting yourself with something that wasn't written well. Look at the damn messages you send me. Did your keyboard NOT come with a fucking ENTER key?

As for not have any stories on this account: Please read my profile. I assure that all your answers will be there. I don't bother explaining myself to idiots who like to point out the obvious to me.

Lunastar? ... My dear, I don't care. I'm just awed at how you're so stupid that you couldn't recognize such heavy sarcasm.

'Real' reviewers. You wouldn't know a real reviewer. Meyer has a lot of fans, including middle-aged women and boys, who don't know what quality is. Again, it proves nothing. It's your critics you should be considering. But you're an egomaniac, completely set in the belief that because you're published, it MUST mean you're a talented author.

"You think you have the right to say whatever you like and you don't..."

Oh, I apologize. I thought I was living in the United States of America. You know, with the first amendment being 'freedom of speech', or were you not awake in history class as you weren't in English class? I don't need to be paid to have an opinion, and I don't need to be paid to express it.

"After this last letter do not attempt to write back or review any of my work because I will block your sorry ass."

Again, read my profile. You will learn that I'm immune to blocking. You will soon learn that if you submit anymore terrible writing. :)

By the way, your dear friends can't write for shit because 'good' and modest writers don't end up on my profile. If you think they can write, then you are only proving my point that having fans who say you're good at something really doesn't mean you are. It's the critic's opinion that should always matter.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23 (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2253454/)
Words of Stupidity:
Quite frankly I am finding you a waste of time now I don't give two shits what you feel about me or my writing I know my writing is good I have had celebrities endorse my work and have been on TV shows, so please do not think you are dealing with some little nobody. I did not ruin myself by coming on here if you think your going to 'scare me off' get a clue I don't scare. I will post anytime I want and no one is immune to blocking so put up of shut up

My Response:
Dear OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23,

It doesn't seem me that I'm too much of a waste of your time if you still see fit to continue trying to convince me that you aren't a mediocre writer. And believe me, as far as I'm concerned, I AM 'dealing with a little nobody' because for someone who claims to have so much publicity ... I've never heard of you.

I don't scare you? Well, pardon me and my excellent observation skills. You seemed right quick to take down all of those stories after you read my review, clearly afraid I was going to critique every one of them. Lucky for you, I don't have the patience to read so much crap in one sitting.

And I don't need to 'put up' to an obvious hard-headed idiot. I am immune blocking. Give me a reason to prove you wrong, kid. However, chances are if you do put your stories back up, I won't be the only one flaming you.

Fatality of Mortality

Author: OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23 (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2253454/)
Words of Stupidity:
I am going to stop you right there you wouldn't have heard of me or my work because as I can plainly see you have a pentagram on your avatar which tells me your a witch of some sort. While it is true I write hard fantasy as well as Sci fi I also write Christian supernatural stories which expose Devil worship. So even if you did recognize my name you wouldn't have bought anything of mine because of the subject matter. And actually no my new stories will not be on this screen name purposely because of your bullshit and your little group of flame throwers. I have other stories for the Transformers which only use the robots with my own Characters but if you think I plan on telling you which name I am using think again. You know something I feel sorry for you if all you have time to do is hurt people and act like some know it all instead of doing something constructive with your life than hey more power to ya!
So you just cant stop making remark like kid and whatever else you said let me ask you something how old are you?

My Response:
Dear OptimusPrimesLittleGirl23,

Now allow me to stop YOU right there. I said I haven't heard of you, and when I googled you, half the links that came up were from sites I've never heard of, and the other half said you were removed.

My beliefs do not restrict what I read, and if anything, they would not have stopped me from picking up your book and flipping through a few pages to at least satisfy my curiosity .. had, you know, any of the stores within a fifty-mile radius of my home knew about you, as well.

Up until I was linked to your profile, I've never heard of you. Whether I would buy your book or not doesn't change that.

As for putting your stories on a different account and thinking that I won't ever find you because you won't tell me the new account name: You forget that I didn't find you on my own. Chances are the one who linked me to you will link me again. Not to mention, I've the simple ability to cruise the first few pages and find you myself.

Continue to underestimate me. It's all right.

Fatality of Mortality

P.S. Attempt to use periods and commas, and even the ENTER key, in your next response and maybe I'll allow you the knowledge of my age.

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