The Lime-Wielding Ninja
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Joined 03-05-08, id: 1517276, Profile Updated: 03-24-11
Author has written 25 stories for Harry Potter, Misc. Cartoons, Twilight, Reboot, NCIS, Toy Story, Star Trek: 2009, and Doctor Who.

I have pretty much given up writing. It's a somewhat shocking realisation to come to.

I still appreciate reviews. I will respond to them.

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Mirror, Mirror by loveislouder94 reviews
Various characters look into the Mirror of Erised. / 44: This is the story of an almost-orphan who defied and exceeded all expectations to become a brave and loyal leader. His name is Neville Longbottom, and he is extraordinary.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 37 - Words: 35,013 - Reviews: 406 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 11/13/2013 - Published: 10/3/2008 - [Lily Evans P., James P.]
Missing Moments by Kaira77 reviews
Did they really fall asleep holding hands? Why were they skulking in the doorway at Shell cottage? And WHAT happened in The Chamber of Secrets? Ron and Hermione's missing moments from DH! Now complete and in the correct order!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 22,603 - Reviews: 222 - Favs: 182 - Follows: 120 - Updated: 6/17/2012 - Published: 7/17/2008 - Ron W., Hermione G. - Complete
The Adventures of Emmett Cullen by Spidergirl93 reviews
The title pretty much explain it all. Lets just say that Emmett finds duck tape... Rated T just cuz I'm paraniod. My first fan fiction, so don't hurt me. Anyways, READ!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 5,953 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 7/7/2010 - Published: 4/28/2008 - Complete
Midnight Conversations by msof57 reviews
Fyedka and Chava are alone in a room in Russia on their way to Krakow. A conversation stirs, and Fyedka is left wondering...
Fiddler on the Roof - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 943 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/5/2010 - Published: 10/21/2009 - Complete
The Voldy Letters by sick-atxxheart reviews
Random letters from the Harry Potter characters and the Dark Lord, discussing evil plans, candy, feelings, and much more. Randomness and fun ensues! May contain OOC-ness and scary randomness. Current: Harry, Hermione, Voldemort, and counseling. Oh no.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 25 - Words: 12,228 - Reviews: 276 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 6/27/2010 - Published: 7/25/2008 - Voldemort
Stuff Happens by NotWhoYouThinkThisIs reviews
AU: All human. When six college students from rival Chicago boarding schools accidentally find themselves sharing a run-down condo for a semester, stuff happens. AxJ, EmxR, ExB... eventually...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 44,856 - Reviews: 310 - Favs: 147 - Follows: 242 - Updated: 5/31/2010 - Published: 3/27/2008
Purple by merlinhelz reviews
Remus comes home to the shock of his life. 600 word Tonks/Remus drabble
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 735 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/8/2009 - N. Tonks, Remus L. - Complete
Have You Heard the One About? by nerdielady reviews
Spock is trying to understand jokes.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,060 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/7/2009 - Spock, N. Uhura - Complete
Muffin Man by Blinguist reviews
Nyota loved seeing Spock squirm like this. She was having a bit of sport with him, but he secretly enjoyed their “playtime” as much as she did—simply because of the enjoyment she derived from such folly. A fluffy, Spock/Uhura oneshot.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,412 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/17/2009 - Spock, N. Uhura - Complete
Not her Mother by clumsy.carrie reviews
Ginny Weasley is a "cool mom"... she doesn't hesitate to let her children do most of what they want and isn't afraid to give them a little space. But is she giving them too much? Family Moment between Bill and Ginny... ONESHOT
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,929 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/1/2009 - Ginny W., Bill W. - Complete
Stuck! by Annilaia reviews
1 new text message: ALICE HELP ME! I'M STUCK IN THE ELEVATOR WITH SOME REALLY HOT GUY I DON'T KNOW!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 11,759 - Reviews: 1404 - Favs: 1,994 - Follows: 730 - Updated: 7/11/2009 - Published: 4/16/2008 - Complete
Feminine Products by siriuslives394 reviews
James is sent to purchase Lily certain… feminine hygiene products. As a male, he’s hesitant. Of course, Sirius accompanies him, and takes advantage of the situation.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,507 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/25/2009 - James P., Sirius B. - Complete
Jellybeans by snapmagic reviews
JamesxLily. Fluff. Prompt: Jellybeans. "James Potter, you eat far too much junk food!"
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 356 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/25/2009 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
A Chronological Account by Erra reviews
Over their seven years at Hogwarts, Scorpius Malfoy and Rose Weasley have met every so often by chance.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 18,945 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 3/22/2009 - Published: 6/30/2008 - Scorpius M. - Complete
Draco’s Gigantic Imperfection by From Spark to Flame reviews
Draco. He’s always been a perfect hottie with a perfect face. Yet, Hermione kept rejecting him. Unfortunately, the day that Draco finally gets to go on a date with his beloved, he discovers something terrible! Something horrifying! A zit.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,322 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 2/11/2009 - Published: 2/5/2009 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Child's Play by Aquila1 reviews
Ziva stopped short, entranced by the sight in front of her... Just where does Tony go every Thursday night? TIVA
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,634 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 128 - Follows: 18 - Published: 2/9/2009 - Ziva D., Tony D. - Complete
One Wrong Step by 88Keys reviews
Tony and McGee must work together when one of them is badly injured while pursuing a suspect through the woods. Tim/Tony friendship. Rated K plus for a rather gruesome injury and mild swearing.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,047 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 1/25/2009 - Published: 1/14/2009 - Tim M., Tony D. - Complete
Purification by Jo. R reviews
The team investigate a serial killer.
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Drama/Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,787 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/23/2009 - Complete
I'm Yours by ShelbyElizabeth reviews
While working on a case, Tim is sent to work with Abby to help catch the killer. Love blossoms in the lab. McAbby one-shot. My first NCIS fic. Please R&R.
NCIS - Rated: K - English - Romance/Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,830 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/16/2009 - Abby S., Tim M. - Complete
Shaken, Not Stirred by mamapranayama reviews
Just a silly little story that proves Tony has seen way too many James Bond films. Rated 'T' for terrible puns and ridiculously crude double entendres.Tiva
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,186 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/13/2009 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
Cheese and Mozart by Miriamimus reviews
Ron and Luna are investigating why Dean and Hermione are spending so much time together, Ginny's running a babysitting service, Harry's spent all day in front of the mirror, Seamus is singing and Neville and Parvati are writing a letter... RHr, HG plzR&R
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,103 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 1/1/2009 - Published: 8/9/2008 - Ron W., Hermione G.
Bad Hair Day by Maths Is Immortal reviews
Few people know Lord Voldemort’s secrets. Only his most trusted followers are told that he’s half-blood, that he’s experimented with ways to obtain immortality, and that he’s actually bald by choice…
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 755 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/29/2008 - Voldemort, Albus D. - Complete
The Annual Death Eater Beach Trip by Professor Cassandra reviews
You probably think of Voldemort and his Death Eaters as terrible, heartless people, and you are normally correct. But for one week every year, they are able to escape the stress of the wizarding world by going on vacation…the muggle way!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 24,698 - Reviews: 239 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 12/14/2008 - Published: 9/13/2008 - Voldemort, Bellatrix L. - Complete
I'm not a muggleborn? by Someone aka Me reviews
Hermione learns a startling secret about her parentage. Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,923 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 12/8/2008 - Published: 11/9/2008 - Hermione G., Sirius B. - Complete
SPARKLE by theessenceofsyd reviews
Oneshot Parody: Edward's sparkle ablility is not up to par.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 365 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/6/2008 - Edward - Complete
Buzz's Good Fortune by MeganKoumori reviews
One Shot. Buzz visits a "psychic." What could his future hold? Takes place one month after "Toy Story 2."
Toy Story - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 669 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 24 - Published: 11/28/2008 - Buzz Lightyear, Jessie - Complete
Anti Insanity by Rucasofcamelot reviews
Neville learns a new potion has been developed which could save his parents. But what else could this potion do? Neville/Luna
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 3,527 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 11/28/2008 - Published: 10/5/2008 - Neville L., Luna L. - Complete
10 Things You Didn't Know by FredWeasley'sCutiePie reviews
10 things you didn't know about the Harry Potter characters. I love reading these so I decided to give it a try.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 13,716 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 11/27/2008 - Published: 3/18/2008
Taking Control by fake a smile reviews
It's the summer before Harry's 6th year, and Harry is wracked with grief. But what happens when Harry makes a vow to himself to take control of his life? Harry's life takes a sharp turn when he gets an unexpected visitor one night. HPGW Independent!Harry
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 28 - Words: 523,307 - Reviews: 2741 - Favs: 4,723 - Follows: 2,557 - Updated: 11/15/2008 - Published: 5/23/2006 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
The Truth behind the Freckles by Reader-Writer reviews
“Sometimes, he wishes he was more like Fred and George.” Facts about Percy, the often forgotten Weasley.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 845 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/9/2008 - Percy W., Audrey W. - Complete
50 Things to Remember When Raising a Monster by dogstar-ebony reviews
- #23- Do not tell Rosie that pressing Uncle Harry’s ‘magic scar’ will make sweets come out of his belly button, as he doesn't find it amusing to have an over-excited four-year-old prodding his forehead." Sequel to "...When My Wife is Pregnant". Funny.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,575 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 200 - Follows: 10 - Published: 11/8/2008 - Ron W., Rose W. - Complete
Play That Funky Music White Boy by TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel reviews
The Doctor finds himself sharing a cell with the Master and the Master's iPod. It goes downhill from there. Oneshot.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,604 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 143 - Follows: 7 - Published: 11/8/2008 - 10th Doctor, The Master - Complete
The Day Job by superficialcynic reviews
short little oneshot about Abby and McGee's child. What happens when she brings McGee to school? R&R
NCIS - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 905 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/30/2008 - Abby S., Tim M. - Complete
50 Things To Remember When My Wife Is Pregnant by dogstar-ebony reviews
-"18. When Hermione is having a Hormone, do not anger her. Do not speak to her, do not breathe in her direction." Ron Weasley has written a list of Do's and Do NOTs to remind himself how to behave whilst Hermione is pregnant with Hugo. Silly oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,205 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 225 - Follows: 10 - Published: 10/28/2008 - Ron W. - Complete
Hogwarts Chat Rooms by siriuslives394 reviews
Hogwarts gets a budget raise. Because of this, they decide to modernize! A bunch of teen students and teachers, each with their own Internet connection. Not a pretty picture. The story says complete, but it doesn't end till I run out of ideas.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 15,289 - Reviews: 227 - Favs: 110 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 10/19/2008 - Published: 7/22/2007 - Complete
Snow by violet-phoenix-rose reviews
A few random moments involving Luna and snow. Challenge oneshot. Slight Luna/Neville at the end.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 724 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Published: 9/26/2008 - Luna L., Neville L. - Complete
The Harry Potter Convention by Memories-of-the-Shadows reviews
What if there was a place where all the Harry Potters the fanfiction world has to offer had a place to meet? What would happen there.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 321 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/9/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
The Wedlock Law by GENIPHIR DAE reviews
Imagine that the Wizarding population is depleating. Imagine that the numbers are now unbelievably low. After the war the magical world realized that they had lost great numbers. It is now up to the young population to repopulate the threatened community.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 41,236 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 101 - Updated: 8/6/2008 - Published: 4/12/2008 - Hermione G., Draco M.
Potter Puppet Pals: Where is Snape? by DarkLordKardos reviews
Harry and Ron just want to bother their least favorite professor, but he is nowhere to be found. A quest across Hogwarts begins! And now, ends.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,941 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/1/2008 - Published: 7/28/2008 - Complete
Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual for SNAPE by twilightm00n reviews
Your prayers have been answered! You are the proud recipient of your very own SNAPE unit! To make the most of this cynical Slytherin Potions professor who is quite fond of double crossings, please read the following instructions carefully.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,848 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 20 - Published: 7/28/2008 - Severus S.
The Desk by GeminiScorp reviews
Hermione finds that Severus' desk holds interesting secrets
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,233 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/28/2008 - Hermione G., Severus S. - Complete
Racing the Summer Moon by sciathan file reviews
The Marauders decide to see the moon...in vehicular style. Gen, One shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,746 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 14 - Published: 7/26/2008 - Sirius B., Remus L. - Complete
Just a Kiss by Hubard reviews
A short comical story set in HBP about Harry and Ginny and a trap that locks them together.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 12,945 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 7/26/2008 - Published: 7/21/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
You're On by Artful Loser reviews
You and Hermione are always attacking each other on the couch! I bet I could go longer without kissing Harry than you could without kissing Hermione.” “Okay, you’re on.” :: PostDH, one-shot, H/G and R/Hr, hopefully funny
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,254 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/24/2008 - Harry P., Ginny W. - Complete
On the Platform by Luanne reviews
Just how Victorie and Teddy ended up like that on the platform...
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,657 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 18 - Published: 7/23/2008 - Teddy L., OC - Complete
The New Year by know-it-all-bookworm reviews
Sequel to "The First Date". Revenge is a dish best served cold...even better when revenge involves embarassment. Charlie and Hermione's wishes for the future are revealed.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,922 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 14 - Published: 7/20/2008 - Hermione G., Charlie W. - Complete
Dear Journal by The Plot Bunny Whisperer reviews
CrackFic. Dear Diary sister/sequel. "Dear Journal, Got an interesting owl from Malfoy's mum today. Apparently, Voldemort tried to kill Malfoy so she sent him to Anger Management Therapy."
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 21 - Words: 2,899 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 163 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 7/19/2008 - Published: 6/29/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
The Dark Lord's Blog by Schmerg The Impaler reviews
It's Lord Voldemort's blog, complete with comments from his most loyal Death Eaters. Voldy dispenses advice on everything from germ prevention to murder methods to shoes to Power Rangers... but is he posting too much personal info online?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,317 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 7/18/2008 - Published: 4/23/2007 - Voldemort
Voldemort and the Sandwich by LovesReading2 reviews
This is a short story written by my 10 year old son. This is another way that Voldemort could have met his downfall. Its funny and both my son and I would like to hear what you think..... be kind and review!
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 373 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/14/2008 - Harry P., Voldemort - Complete
The Luckiest Survivors In History by Mezzanottex3 reviews
..."So let's say my bad luck did crash the plane. What exactly were you going to do about it?"... Bella and Edward find themselves in a rather ironic situation. ::edward x bella oneshot::
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,321 - Reviews: 267 - Favs: 583 - Follows: 66 - Published: 7/9/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Regrets by Ange LeNoir reviews
He loved her with everything that he had and that was exactly why he had to leave her. Now years later he meets her at a party only now she hates him. How will he react? Not as bad as it sounds.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,403 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 6 - Published: 7/5/2008 - Remus L., OC - Complete
Spare Me the French by painted.inkblot reviews
In which James Potter II attempts to impress his cousin Dominique with French. Is anyone else thinking 'failed plan? Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 873 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/4/2008 - James S. P., Dominique W. - Complete
When It Rains by Missy Padfoot reviews
One-Shot: Time are tough for Alice and Frank Longbottom.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 800 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Published: 7/3/2008 - Alice L., Frank L. - Complete
Unhappy Birthday by eruthiel reviews
Oneshot for Maggoty Anne. It's Sam Vimes' f-something birthday, and everyone seems determined to remind him of it. Will he last the day? And just how old IS the Commander? It doesn't actually say how old he is, I just said that for effect. XP
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,295 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 2 - Published: 6/12/2008 - Complete
Do Not! Do Too! by omfgwtflmao reviews
Marauders passing notes during a very boring lesson. RLSB. SLASH. ONESHOT. Don't Like? Don't read!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,227 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 6/7/2008 - Published: 6/6/2008 - Sirius B., Remus L. - Complete
Beware of by M-Dub 720 reviews
Prongs, Moony, and Padfoot take a trip to the hardware store and begin a list of things to "beware of". If only Padfoot paid attention to his madness.... Very short. Kind of sad at the end.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 337 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 5 - Published: 6/3/2008 - Sirius B., James P. - Complete
If You Only Knew by NLaddict reviews
Neville is the way he is for a reason.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 837 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 10 - Published: 6/2/2008 - Neville L. - Complete
I AM Silent by Child-Of-God13 reviews
Bella is vampire that moves to Forks with her vampire "parents". She can see all of your past thoughts and whole life in a single touch. The catch: she hasn't spoken since her change. Can the Cullens get her to speak? ExB First chap a double chap
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 32,448 - Reviews: 1468 - Favs: 956 - Follows: 439 - Updated: 6/2/2008 - Published: 2/14/2008 - Complete
Love, Ron by acciohagrid reviews
Half a year after the Battle of Hogwarts, Hermione is back at school and Ron is working at the Ministry with Harry. Ron has a special surprise planned for his girlfriend.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 2,212 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 4/21/2008 - Published: 4/10/2008 - Hermione G., Ron W. - Complete
Coloured Pencils by foxtrot run reviews
Hermione knows that something is strangely wrong when a Weasley boy hauls her into the linen closet with him at the Burrow. And that something happens to be coloured pencils. FWHG
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 716 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/2/2008 - Fred W., Hermione G. - Complete
Clueless in the Library by Dibss reviews
Next generation: A small Lily Scorpius oneshot because I think they are the CUTEST pair ever! Reviews are read, replied to, loved and cherished!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 784 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/13/2008 - Scorpius M., Lily Evans P. - Complete
Finding Neville by nevillesgirlfriend reviews
Set shortly after the final battle at Hogwarts. It's Neville's first visit to his parents since the battle. Bellatrix LeStrange is dead. How does he tell his parents? Will they even understand? Based on characters created by J.K. Rowling. I own no rights.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,174 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/7/2008 - Neville L., Alice L. - Complete
Cold Sunshine by painted.inkblot reviews
And suddenly she realizes, it's all wrong - the sunshine is cold. Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 661 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 3 - Published: 1/25/2008 - Alice L., Frank L. - Complete
Fox Ears by The Starhorse reviews
The Weasley family is deep in mourning after the battle of Hogwarts, but George has better ideas than to sit around and cry about something he'd rather just fix. And Charlie believes he can do it. Post DH, Charlie's POV.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,648 - Reviews: 465 - Favs: 1,157 - Follows: 85 - Published: 1/13/2008 - George W., Charlie W. - Complete
Ultimate Ending! by Pirate Bo reviews
The real ending of Harry Potter. Total Crack fic. Somewhat spoilers for DH. Expect randomness, werewolfsturnedbulls, dancing hats, crazy stabbing ghosts, etc.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,627 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/19/2007 - Harry P.
Never Tickle a Sleeping Draco by GinnyWazlibRocks reviews
An expedition journal and audio recording of Fred and George's adventure into the Slytherian House. Target: Malfoy. Why: Why not? And what will happen when they stumble upon a surprising secret? Rated for mild language. No ships. Final chapie up!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,317 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 11/12/2007 - Published: 4/7/2007 - George W., Draco M. - Complete
Sirius' Shiny Teeth by SilverwingsJP reviews
Sirius sings while brushing his teeth...the possibilities with that...
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,114 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/10/2007 - Sirius B. - Complete
Not On My Watch by siriusly klutzy reviews
A very pregnant Lily has to pee, but Sirius isn't having a good hair day and has locked himself in the bathroom.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 609 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 112 - Follows: 10 - Published: 10/27/2007 - Lily Evans P. - Complete
The Shower Cap Of True and Utter Evilness by siriuslives394 reviews
No one messes with Sirius's hair. No one.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,040 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/18/2007 - Sirius B. - Complete
Dealing with Phlegm by herecomesthesuntherain reviews
Fleur has come to visit the Weasleys before she and Bill get married. How do Ginny, Fred and George deal with her? Set in sixth book time, before Harry gets to the Weasleys at the beginning.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,118 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 13 - Published: 8/28/2007 - Ginny W., Fleur D. - Complete
The Original Naked Quidditch Match by Evilgoddss reviews
When a Magical game of Truth & Dare goes wrong, the Gryffindor Quidditch team must 'bare' up and face the consequences. And as the news spreads like wildfire in mmail things get quite out of control.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 22,510 - Reviews: 742 - Favs: 2,811 - Follows: 402 - Published: 7/29/2007 - Harry P. - Complete
Blindfolded by siriuslives394 reviews
An all dialogue oneshot. James has blindfolded Sirius, Sirius wants to know why. Not slash.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,652 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/24/2007 - James P., Sirius B. - Complete
I Am Lord by Visible reviews
Tom Riddle, as a teenager, is trying to name himself. How did he get the name Voldemort anyways?
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 949 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 16 - Published: 7/19/2007 - Tom R. Jr. - Complete
A Tale of Spoinkles by An-Jelly-Ca reviews
“I want my spoinkle, Remmie.”“…”“My spoinkle puff.”“Are you drunk, Sirius?”R&R...pure dialogue. Spoinkles are explained inside.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 816 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 6 - Published: 7/12/2007 - Sirius B., Remus L. - Complete
Hello, My Name Is Fatherhood by Daisy Miller reviews
It felt like someone barged into his house, waving a name tag in his face that said: Hello, my name is Fatherhood. Nice to meet you. [Fremione]
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,974 - Reviews: 128 - Favs: 114 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 6/19/2007 - Published: 10/14/2006 - Hermione G., Fred W. - Complete
How the Brazilian Boa Constrictor Did Not Help by Marauder reviews
Full title: How the Brazilian Boa Constrictor Did Not Help Harry Potter Defeat Voldemort. A crackfic in which Hermione's given Harry an idea about defeating Voldemort but the boa constrictor, an essential part of the plan, has other ideas.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 429 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 9 - Published: 4/10/2007 - Harry P. - Complete
Pi Day by Queen of Duct Tape reviews
Harry and Ron wonder just what, exactly, Pi Day is.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 869 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/14/2007 - Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
Professor, I think I'm dying by Samantha Anne Green reviews
“Ms. Granger!” Snape said loudly. The girl jumped, and spun around, and then to Snape’s surprise, sighed and clutched her stomach as a new expression of relief washed over her face. Oneshot. No flames please.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,807 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 7 - Published: 3/6/2007 - Hermione G., Severus S. - Complete
The Kill by Morvana Du'Miruvor reviews
Oneshot. After Harry failed, Hermione escaped to America, but was admitted to a psych ward for witches. After a hard week, her doctor wants to know what her problem is and why the treatments aren't working. What he finds is terrifying and extraordinary.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,581 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/13/2007 - Hermione G. - Complete
A Sirius Detour by RemusSiriusJames reviews
Oh boy. James is driving a car. Join him, Sirius, Lily and Remus on a thirty mile journey home which contains of firstaid kits, traffic jams and a very bored Sirius. James may be driving the car, but Sirius is driving too Driving everybody absolutley mad.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,877 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/5/2007 - James P., Sirius B. - Complete
The Unsaid Words by DarkObsessor reviews
[One shot] Morwen cares for the injured Telemain, and has some slight reflection on the past few days before Telemain asks her a question. This one is set in a small space of time we were not privy to in Talking To Dragons.
Enchanted Forest - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,345 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/29/2007 - Complete
Home Security by Kairi 'Shadow Sage' Taylor reviews
Dr. Claw decides the only way to take care of Gadget will be via taking care of Penny first. But sometimes, things don't go the way we expect them to.
Inspector Gadget - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,589 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 5 - Published: 10/7/2006 - Complete
A DADA Interview by The-Caitiff reviews
Dumbledore interviews the new Defense instructor. Perhaps he should have asked to see some ID...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 952 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 148 - Follows: 32 - Published: 6/10/2006 - Complete
Mistaken Identity by Silver Pard reviews
Will the real Boy Who Lived please stand up? Snape is convinced that the second Potter twin is the one to worry about. Too bad no one else seems to agree. Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,341 - Reviews: 212 - Favs: 1,337 - Follows: 228 - Published: 3/27/2006 - Severus S., Harry P. - Complete
Dear Professor Dumbledore by Glorious Clio reviews
Someone writes a letter to try and get past their grief.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 919 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/10/2005 - Albus D. - Complete
Birth of a Name by nonjon reviews
COMPLETE. OneShot. 1943. A Slytherin prefect on the brink of a series of lifechanging events, needs to settle on a secret identity that will inspire fear in the hearts of the weak... You didn’t think 'I am Lord Voldemort' was his first choice, did you?
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,535 - Reviews: 457 - Favs: 1,440 - Follows: 183 - Published: 10/15/2005 - Complete
Made With Our Love by Marauder reviews
Harry knows what he has to do tell Draco that he's pregnant with their child.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 545 - Reviews: 433 - Favs: 722 - Follows: 69 - Published: 2/7/2005 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Crossword Puzzles by Trinity Day reviews
Lily, James and Sirius take the time to attempt to do the crossword. Also featuring Baby Harry.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,405 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 147 - Follows: 11 - Published: 6/9/2002 - Sirius B., James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
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Your Biggest Fan: A Ballad reviews
So, the universe is falling apart. Who do we need? THE DOCTOR! Whichever Doctor you think fits best, though I've listed it as 11th. No ships, but there is the TARDIS. Not really a crossover, but kind of. One-shot.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 887 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 7/11/2010 - 11th Doctor, TARDIS - Complete
Journal, Property of J Potter reviews
James Potter's journal. He's decided to document his final year at Hogwarts. Marauder era. I don't own any characters you might recognize. JP/LE, naturally.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 7,715 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 4/18/2010 - Published: 9/15/2008 - James P., Lily Evans P.
The Two Additions reviews
James and Lily Potter live in the same apartment as Alice and Frank Longbottom. Harry Potter and Neville Longbottom were born around the same time, weren't they? What if there had been two Aurors to fight off Voldemort? I don't own.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,381 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 11/18/2009 - Published: 9/20/2008 - Lily Evans P., Alice L.
The Disney Sell Out Incident reviews
A Hallowe'en at NCIS headquarters. Inspired by something Abby said about costumes being banned because of McGee in skinny jeans. This is that story. I don't own anything. Really subtle McAbby. Like, REALLY subtle. Work in progress.
NCIS - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,156 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/31/2009 - Tim M., Abby S.
Parchment Letter reviews
What would have happened if Harry had not brought the Hogwarts letter to the table at breakfast, but had hidden it in the cupboard under the stairs? I don't own. It's all JKRs. Genres may change. Warning! Abuse!
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,177 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 10/11/2009 - Published: 11/16/2008 - Harry P.
One Last Bit of Fun reviews
Fred and George are in a retirement home, and haven't had a proper laugh in a decade. And who knows when they're going to kick the bucket? So they decide to have one last bit of fun. Slight crackfic. I don't own. AU, Fred's not dead.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,106 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 10/2/2009 - Published: 3/8/2009 - Fred W., George W.
The Veil reviews
Harry refuses to believe that Sirius is dead. He therefore tries to find a way to get him back. The genres may or may not change, all depends on how this fic works out. I don't own the characters.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy/Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,519 - Reviews: 10 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 9/22/2009 - Published: 6/15/2008 - Harry P.
Mum and Dada? reviews
Harry wakes up in the middle of the night to find that he is on a doorstep, wrapped up in a very warm blanket, holding a piece of parchment. Where did his mum and dada go? He's going to try and find them, but who will he meet on the way? I don't own.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,093 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 9/8/2009 - Published: 1/10/2009 - Harry P.
All a Dream reviews
Harry wakes up in St. Mungo's to find that it was just a dream. But dreams, like myths, often have some truths. Now Harry has to separate the fact from the fiction. DH spoilers! Beware! OCs are mine. Harry is not.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 28 - Words: 25,134 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 9/1/2009 - Published: 6/5/2008 - Harry P. - Complete
Runaway reviews
She could sense the opportunity waving at her...survival was differant than...living." Shannon and Kelly never died. Shannon/Jethro, of course. No other ships yet. I don't own.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Tragedy - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,043 - Reviews: 5 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 7/26/2009 - Published: 2/11/2009 - Leroy Jethro Gibbs
The Search for Better Council reviews
For Celebwen Telcontar's challenge: Harry needs more advice on how to save the wizarding world. He needs to be taught by someone with experience, wisdom and patience. His friends are with him. He wishes they weren't. I suck at summaries. I don't own.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,840 - Reviews: 12 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 6/24/2009 - Published: 12/1/2008 - Harry P.
Just Because I Am Not Smiling reviews
Uhura is mad at Spock. Why can't they be a couple? The reason why occurs every seven years...distinct Spock/Uhura. Set just post-movie. I do not own. Rated T for a reason.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,975 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 5 - Published: 6/22/2009 - N. Uhura, Spock - Complete
The Steps I Took reviews
Tony and McGee meet accidentally in a bar and talk about their relationships with Ziva and Abby. TIVA and MCABBY! Song-fic, oneshot. I don't own. Liable to be re-redited a lot. Happy Valentines Day!
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,829 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/15/2009 - Tony D., Tim M. - Complete
Falling With Style reviews
When Buzz and Woody were flying at the end of Toy story, there were witnesses: the birds on the telephone wire. Toy Story/For the Birds X-over. I don't own. One-shot.
Toy Story - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 336 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/27/2009 - Complete
30 Things to Remember About a Pregnant Ziva reviews
Title says all. I don't own. One-shot. TIVA!
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 446 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 103 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/24/2009 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete
Librarian Plus Janitor Equals WHAT? reviews
Harry Potter was right all along. There IS something between Madam Pince and Filch. What it is, even they aren't quite sure. This proves to bring chaos. Not slash, although it might be hinted at in the future. I don't own the characters.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,486 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/8/2009 - Published: 4/21/2008 - Argus F., I. Pince
Happy Howler reviews
Set during my story, All a Dream. Harry gets a Howler. I don't own. Except the OCs.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 140 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Published: 12/6/2008 - Harry P., OC - Complete
Bob and The Hobbit reviews
A game lands in Mainframe that Bob has never seen before, with graphics that are unheard of. The first things he sees are flowers, bushes and a little round door painted green. I don't own.
Reboot - Rated: K - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 316 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/29/2008
Father's Daughter reviews
What if Hugo were the brains, and Rose was the brave one? I don't own. One-shot...maybe... It says complete, but if I find somewhere to go with this, I'll continue.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 681 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Published: 11/22/2008 - Hugo W., Rose W. - Complete
What Teddy Lupin Was reviews
Remus Lupin was a werewolf. Nymphadora Tonks was a metamorphmagus. What did their son become? I don't own. Probably a one-shot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 394 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/11/2008 - Teddy L. - Complete
Thomas Marvolo Riddle reviews
What would have happened, when he was choosing a new name for himself, if Tom Riddle's full name was Thomas Marvolo Riddle? What would those three extra letters do to the name so many wizards and witches fear? T for politics. I don't own. Two-shot. DONE!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 738 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 10/31/2008 - Published: 7/20/2008 - Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Turning Her Down reviews
See my fic Turned Down first. This is a oneshot in Edward's POV. Jessica asks him to the Spring Dance. I'm horrible at EPOV, so don't kill me, please. R&R I don't own.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 575 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/19/2008 - Edward, Jessica - Complete
Turned Down reviews
A little oneshot I've been thinking of writing since I first read Twilight. Jessica asks Edward Cullen to the Spring Dance. I don't own Edward or any other characters.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 222 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/21/2008 - Jessica, Edward - Complete
Draco's Love reviews
A love letter to Draco's not-so-secret love. It's sort of slash. I actually finished it! Huzzah! I own nothing but the plot. *snickers* there's no plot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 591 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 5/28/2008 - Published: 3/11/2008 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
The Strudel Girl reviews
A one-shot about Mini-Wheats. Laugh at it. Not slash, but you never know with Mini-Wheats. I don't own the mini-wheat.
Misc. Cartoons - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 176 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/14/2008 - Complete