Jasper's My Name
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Joined 03-09-08, id: 1519984, Profile Updated: 05-12-09
Author has written 3 stories for Twilight.

YIPPEE!! I'm Married!!

Ummmm...

Hey there! Bubbly722 reminded me to update my profile! I'm in Mali doing some peace corps work there. We're building wells in some of the villages and making homes for those who have none. It really hot here. And i hate that everything is in Bambara (the language they speak here). The only things in french and English are the news and the soap operas. The internet here is really crappy and works at most once a day...

I don't really know why anyone would really give a damn who I am... I mean, you're all here for the stories aren't you?

For those people who really do give a damn to know that the author of their story isn't a rapist, or a ninja, or a vampire...here's a bit about me.

My name REALLY is Jasper. I'm tall, I'm blonde (naturally), but my eyes aren't a stunning topaz, instead they are a dull green. I was living In California and Having a hell of a good time at the beaches because its a good place to read (and swim...), and My twin shares an appartment with me. The sad thing about me and my twin is that we were separated at birth. He was raised in Germany, me in France. Our parents are divorced and they each took one of us (this happens in real life too ya know...) so there would be no fighting fo custody and whatever. Since we're both 19, we decided to go against our parents wishes and met. I speak french, he speaks german. He really gets on my nerves sometimes but I like him enough to live with him so...

Those of you who want to read my avatar and see just how darned cute our favorite vampires are, here's the link-

Here is some stuff to amuse you after having to endure my boring life's story..:

A good or best friend!

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. A best friend will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you.

A good friend will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. A best friend will throw you a tampon and push you in.

A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool!

-He who laughs last thinks slowest

-If two wrongs don't make a right, try three

-1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you.

-One day we're going to look back on this, laugh nervously and then change the subject

-We're best friends. You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You just off a bridge, damn, I'm gonna miss your dumb ass

-Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. Either it's my mom or my dad. Or my older brother Collin. Or my other brother Ho-Chan-Chu. I think it's Collin. (Not mine)

-A good friend will bail you out of jail, a great friend will be sitting next to you in your cell going "We fucked up, huh?"

-Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't

-I can only please on person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow's not looking good, either.

Last night i looked up at the stars and matched each star to a reason i love you. I was doing fine until I ran out of stars.

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Life was so simple when boys had cooties.

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, geez!

Emmet Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843

Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916

Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You since 1901

Bella Swan: Clumsier than you since 1989

Carlisle Cullen: Smarter than you since 1640

Esme Cullen: More motherly than you since 1908

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as they go by.

Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic...

Whose cruel idea was it for the words 'lisp' to have an 's' in it?

Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, and then kill them.

Don’t mess with me I've got a stick

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

Boys are like Slinky's, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs. (hah, I haven been pushed down the stairs yet...)

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love. (Not me...fiancee)

If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving.

"Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else"

"Real girls aren't perfect, perfect girls aren't real."

"Why is it that people are fine with everyone having a different job or going to a different school, but if you say you follow a different religion, you are weird?"

"A good friend bails you out of jail. A great friend is sitting there next to you saying 'Man, that was fun!'"

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

When you fall: A friend helps you up; a best friend keeps walking and says,"Walk much dumbass?"

People often ignore the simple things in life. If someone really annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown. On the other hand, it only takes 4 muscles to reach over and bitch slap that mutha fucker upside the head.

Music is like candy-you throw away the rappers

He Said:

I don't know why you wear a bra, you have nothing to put in it.

She Said:

You wear pants don't you?

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse

Dresses for Chapter five of Mans Lust for a Woman

Rose-

Bella-

Alice- Imagine it in red though,

My name is Chris.

I am three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren't ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can't do a wrong

I can't speak at all

Or else im locked up

All day long.

When im awake im all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren't home

When my mommy does come home

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe i'll just get

One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie's bar.

I hear him curse

My name is called

I press myself

Against the wall

I try to hide

From his evil eyes

I'm so afraid now

I'm starting to cry

He finds me weeping

Calls me ugly words,

He says its my fault

He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And run to the door

He's already locked it

And i start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken,

"I'm sorry!", I scream

But its now much to late

His face has been twisted

Into a unimaginable shape

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

O please God, have mercy!

O please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door

While i lay there motionless

Brawled on the floor

My name is Chris

I am three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me.

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILDABUSE, COPY THAT POEM INTO YOUR PROFILE!!

Mommy.. Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did What I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

But Mommy, when I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye,

I'm sorry Mommy, I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, He hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, Got the gun from his older brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Trevor; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now,

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best;

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest.

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass.

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one deserves this,

Mommy, warn the others, Mommy I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know they really did try,

I think I even saw a doctor, Trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, With a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest.

Mommy I ran as fast as I could,

When I heard that crack, Mommy, listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new,

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo.

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, Mommy, I wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Trevor, I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know; you know it's true,

And Mommy all I wanted to say is, "Mommy, I love you."

In Loving Memory of The Columbine Students Who Were Lost

Please if you would,

Pass this around,

I'd be happy if you could,

Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as "Try Not To Cry" 2)
Don't send it, and you have just proven how cold-hearted you really are

NEW QUOTES! From iSeddie (check out the stories if you watch iCarly)

"People used to call me names, but thats ok, they're dead now."

"I don't want your soul, but I like your heart. Can I eat it?" (lol...my favorite one XD. Thanks iSeddie!)

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Excruciating by eloquentlyinsane reviews
"Jasper Hale is staring at you," Jessica hissed in her ear. AU. JxB. REVISED.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,205 - Reviews: 154 - Favs: 195 - Follows: 150 - Updated: 8/20/2011 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Bella, Jasper
Betrayal by Chedea reviews
Fate pushes Bella into a tangle of an arranged marriage, an affair, werewolves, vampires, deceit, loss, pain, but most of all love. Does love really over come all obstacles or are some things simply not meant to be? Can Bella take fate into her own hands
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 143,831 - Reviews: 688 - Favs: 361 - Follows: 248 - Updated: 5/29/2011 - Published: 12/13/2007 - Complete
The Foreign Hottie by blackxout reviews
Edward Cullen is a foreign exchange student from London who comes to live with the Swans for a whole year. Bella Swan couldn’t be anymore upset over the fact that a boy has to share a room with her. Could her feelings toward him ever change? OOC.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 46,181 - Reviews: 4989 - Favs: 2,631 - Follows: 2,774 - Updated: 8/12/2010 - Published: 4/5/2008 - Bella, Edward
Humanity by NiceIceEdward reviews
When Isabella Swan comes to Forks High School, Edward feels forced to leave, leaving the Cullens in a quandary, and bringing the new girl into the Cullen family’s notice. A Jasper/Bella fic.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 30,093 - Reviews: 201 - Favs: 212 - Follows: 294 - Updated: 8/1/2010 - Published: 9/16/2008 - Jasper, Bella
Becoming A Cullen, Jasper's story by KelliNew reviews
Canon, pre-Twilight. Alice and Jasper joined the Cullens a few weeks ago. Jasper is struggling to become a member of this peculiar family, but he's having problems adjusting to a life so different from anything he's known.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 17 - Words: 36,967 - Reviews: 400 - Favs: 288 - Follows: 249 - Updated: 7/31/2010 - Published: 3/8/2009 - Jasper, Edward
Midnight Desire by Twilightzoner reviews
An All Human parody of Midnight Sun. AH, AU and consequently OOC. No blood lust - just uncontrollable human lust. Smut filled fun . . .
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 89,654 - Reviews: 5365 - Favs: 6,886 - Follows: 3,328 - Updated: 7/1/2010 - Published: 7/13/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
I Hate Myself For Loving You by halojones reviews
Bella's ready to bust out of her shell in college with roomie Alice. She meets the dazzling but rakish Edward, but is warned of his less than angelic ways. Will B/A be just another notch in the belt for J/E, or will they teach the boys a lesson or two?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 60 - Words: 239,525 - Reviews: 10021 - Favs: 7,435 - Follows: 6,120 - Updated: 4/19/2010 - Published: 3/28/2008
Just Say by reincarnatedcrazybutterfly reviews
NOMINATED at the Indie Twific Awards.“What if we’re not meant to be with each other as well?” Bella asked. “So?” Jasper replied. “Um…” “Then make a mistake with me.” He whispered. Complimentary Story to the oneshot songfic, SAY ALL I NEED.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 25 - Words: 53,492 - Reviews: 496 - Favs: 395 - Follows: 120 - Updated: 2/4/2010 - Published: 6/21/2008 - Bella, Jasper - Complete
Anything for You by Lady Saruman reviews
Alice and Jasper have been best friends ever since they were babies. They trust each other with everything. However, they discover in high school that they want to be more. But after college, Alice is about to marry another. What happens then? AU/AH.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 38,408 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 12/31/2009 - Published: 8/27/2008 - Alice, Jasper
Trapped in Heaven by lovedforeternity reviews
Bella, an outgoing advertising executive finds herself in a compromising position with a sexy man as the elevator in her office building breaks down. As she fears death, will this be the final chapter of her life, or will they save each other? All human
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 21 - Words: 58,200 - Reviews: 1067 - Favs: 1,714 - Follows: 942 - Updated: 10/6/2009 - Published: 8/26/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
You're the Closest to Heaven I'll Ever Be by Phantom of a Rose reviews
“Before Edward left, I couldn’t imagine living without him...I thought I would die...and when he did leave, I almost did. I never thought anyone would take his place in my life; even begin to fill his shoes....but now here you are." TotallyAU. BellaJasper
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 14 - Words: 41,274 - Reviews: 292 - Favs: 240 - Follows: 251 - Updated: 9/18/2009 - Published: 8/27/2008 - Bella, Jasper
Nerd by Says The Schizophrenic reviews
AU:Edward is a nerdy dork. And human. He is being abused by his military father, and his monster of a mother just died. Bella is a happy, beautiful free spirited Vampire, living with the Cullen family. Some Humor. BXE. GIVE IT A SHOT! You wont regret it!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 83,691 - Reviews: 1108 - Favs: 617 - Follows: 710 - Updated: 7/27/2009 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Bella, Edward
Beating Bella by robbiee reviews
When Bella goes to live with Charlie nothing goes how she expects. Will things work out for Bella? Read and find out! R and R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 38 - Words: 53,728 - Reviews: 384 - Favs: 140 - Follows: 126 - Updated: 7/2/2009 - Published: 8/22/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Masquerade by dream-a-lot reviews
I pulled open the door only to be slapped.“Edward…how could you?”Alice said.“Alice…what are you talking about?”“You never gave a f- for Bella!What are you doing?”she screamed.“I’m fixing this mess!I didn’t even write that stupid thing!”I yelled.AH w/twist
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 41,604 - Reviews: 590 - Favs: 325 - Follows: 279 - Updated: 6/22/2009 - Published: 9/6/2008
Happily Ever After by AnnaOtaku reviews
Sequel to Our Favorite Year. It's been two years since Edward and Alice Cullen changed the lives of Jasper, Bella, Rosalie, and Emmett. But now, the drama they thought was gone from their lives has returned. Will things ever be the same again? J/B J/A B/E
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 24 - Words: 33,307 - Reviews: 511 - Favs: 142 - Follows: 135 - Updated: 5/30/2009 - Published: 8/23/2008 - Jasper, Bella - Complete
Making Love Out Of Nothing At All by ashel-13 reviews
Edward thought of Bella as just a friend, but Bella always felt more.That was 3 years ago and now she's ready to make Edward Cullen fall in love with her and make this the best summer of her life. All Human OOC Lemons Gall-lore! WARNING: NC-17
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 77 - Words: 291,632 - Reviews: 11629 - Favs: 8,552 - Follows: 2,583 - Updated: 5/22/2009 - Published: 2/8/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Found by dreams of bubbles reviews
Bella is Jasper's younger sister. After discovering the news of her missing brother, she runs to the forest where she is found by a vampire and changed. Now, years later, she is in Forks, and she finds the person she thought she had lost forever.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 38,328 - Reviews: 1112 - Favs: 1,000 - Follows: 1,027 - Updated: 4/20/2009 - Published: 9/3/2008 - Bella, Jasper
Starting Over by Poo2110 reviews
Bella's back in Forks after 7 years. Can she and Edward resolve their past differences? All human, normal pairings. CHAPTER 20 IS NOW UP!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 21 - Words: 40,325 - Reviews: 184 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 4/17/2009 - Published: 6/6/2008
Alter Ego by BookMe reviews
Something different from my other stories. By day, Bella is a student in school, neighbour to the Cullens but Bella is a little hard on cash, so, by night she does what she must to attain some money. All Human. Better than it sounds.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 19,282 - Reviews: 297 - Favs: 147 - Follows: 264 - Updated: 4/14/2009 - Published: 10/1/2008 - Bella, Edward
Only Time Will Tell by Emmett-Cullen-Lova-01 reviews
Bella goes to the Cullen's and see's Edward and Alice half naked on top of each other. What's going on with Edward and Alice? More importantly what's going on between Jasper and Bella? This is a Jasper/Bella story!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 42,141 - Reviews: 992 - Favs: 442 - Follows: 376 - Updated: 3/29/2009 - Published: 1/7/2008 - Complete
Bad Fanfiction by yayme2012 reviews
Funny fanfic telling what you SHOULDN'T do in Twilight fanfiction... Includes JacobXBella, EmmettXBella, and my personal fave: BananasXBella! New chapters include The Movie, Yum Lemons, and 2008. Curing Twilight fanfiction, one parody at a time.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 66 - Words: 51,675 - Reviews: 2796 - Favs: 569 - Follows: 331 - Updated: 3/2/2009 - Published: 11/14/2007 - Elizabeth, Aro
Last Kiss Goodbye by GippalGurl reviews
NEW STORY! ALL HUMAN Bella Swan, slave to her job,leads a very boring life in NYC. She meets Edward Cullen the smooth,gorgeous criminal. What has he been sent to do, and why? What will Bella do when she finds out? EDWARDxBELLA
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,972 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 2/15/2009 - Published: 9/9/2008 - Edward, Bella
Strange Change by mrs.edwardcullen9090 reviews
A wish on a shooting star causes Edward an Bella to end up in each others bodies! What will happen? will they be able to change back? First fan fic! Review please! Placed after new moon but before eclipse.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 8,837 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 2/6/2009 - Published: 7/21/2008 - Bella, Edward
Adopted by a Vampire by CharmedMilliE reviews
Bella is adopted by a vampire at the age of five and knows all about vampires when she meets Edward and his family. How does this change things?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 17 - Words: 24,208 - Reviews: 580 - Favs: 549 - Follows: 318 - Updated: 1/30/2009 - Published: 7/2/2008 - Complete
My Happy Ending by twirlonwater reviews
Post-Eclispe Bella's happy ending turns sour when she stumbles into troubles while Edward is gone before the wedding. The effect is diabolitical, and Bella might have to be changed now to save her very life. Rated M for Rape, Language, Sex! Please, R&R!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 15 - Words: 35,682 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 1/16/2009 - Published: 5/4/2008
Stranded by staceygirl aka jackbauer reviews
Bella gets stranded in a small town during a record storm. She meets Edward whom she is immediately attracted to and befriends, but why is it that everyone in the town seems to treat him like some sort of monster? Can she help him find peace again?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 38 - Words: 112,808 - Reviews: 1527 - Favs: 1,483 - Follows: 497 - Updated: 1/9/2009 - Published: 9/29/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Butterfly Effect by The-Bat-Girl reviews
Its funny, isn't it, how one tiny thing that happens diffrently in the past could change the path of destiny . What happens when Bella's vampire love is not who its ment to be and his old lover is back for more? JasperxBella! RATED T JUST IN CASE!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 18,390 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 97 - Updated: 12/21/2008 - Published: 3/19/2008 - Jasper, Bella
California, Here I come by Twilight Halo reviews
Bella is forced to move to California since her parents are unable to take care of her. Child Society puts her in with one of the richest families in the OC- the Cullens. Bella has to deal with peer pressure, and stuck up player Edward Cullen. ALL HUMAN!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 37,667 - Reviews: 821 - Favs: 431 - Follows: 561 - Updated: 12/13/2008 - Published: 7/15/2008 - Edward, Bella
Pens & Sharpies by pleasebiteme reviews
Let the Cullens pass notes! I find it hilarious. Maybe you shall, too. ;D
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 100 - Words: 18,268 - Reviews: 1440 - Favs: 298 - Follows: 164 - Updated: 12/7/2008 - Published: 1/27/2008 - Complete
On the Mend by xiao chan reviews
FINISHED AU: After the brutal murder of her parents, Bella's sent to live in Forks under the Witness Protection Program. Her will to live dwindles with each passing day...but can a sympathetic Edward convince her that life is worth living after all?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 17 - Words: 67,343 - Reviews: 344 - Favs: 218 - Follows: 127 - Updated: 11/22/2008 - Published: 6/11/2008 - Complete
Druidess by Wonderfall reviews
A story about how breaking up with Harry Potter can change your life for the better. Hermione's life is hectic, and it only seems to be getting worse with each passing day. But things will get better. Right? Dramione.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 40,049 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 11/21/2008 - Published: 7/27/2008 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
Blind by babysis reviews
A tale as old as time about best friends who can't see that they're made for each other. Will they realize it before it's too late? It's better than it sounds, I promise. At least, I hope...Usual couples, rated for some language and suggestions. R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 18 - Words: 32,399 - Reviews: 407 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 11/16/2008 - Published: 8/11/2008 - Complete
Something's Going On by NiceIceEdward reviews
There are things going on in the Cullen house, Emmett's confusion leads the story.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 13,952 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 11/13/2008 - Published: 10/11/2008 - Jasper, Bella - Complete
Kill Or Be Killed by Clarissa Frey reviews
She’s a lone vampire slayer, paid to keep the supernatural world a secret and wipe out vampires. He’s a hunter who deals with slayers. She's hired to kill Him. He’s to kill Her. What happens when they’re forced to work together for the safety of society?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 39,693 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 190 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 11/7/2008 - Published: 10/13/2008 - Bella, Jasper - Complete
Babysitting Bella by GoldenEyes4 reviews
What will happen when Emmett and Jasper are left to watch over Bella when the Cullen's go on a four day hunting trip? Only a hilarious disaster that will cause them to be chased and hunted down.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 22 - Words: 34,750 - Reviews: 634 - Favs: 377 - Follows: 178 - Updated: 11/5/2008 - Published: 8/19/2008 - Complete
Twisted Bliss by Lady Loser reviews
Lust. That's all it was for Jasper and I. Nothing more. I shifted my gaze from the ground, and looked into his eyes, telling myself that I was happily married. But I melted under his gaze, weak at the knees, "Jasper, I love you." J/B, E/B. Breaking Dawn.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 9,763 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 10/27/2008 - Published: 10/4/2008 - Jasper, Bella
Side Effects by Bubbly722 reviews
What if Bella's only side effect after being bitten by James wasn't only a scar. What if she had a few more things to worry about? The writing gets better in later chapters. R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 27,749 - Reviews: 211 - Favs: 106 - Follows: 125 - Updated: 10/26/2008 - Published: 3/3/2008 - Bella - Complete
Number 473 by DelilahTCullen reviews
Bella works for the government and her job is to find out info bout mythical creatures and how they became. What happens when they get a particularly stubborn vampire? Can she make him crack?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 19,168 - Reviews: 130 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 10/22/2008 - Published: 8/2/2008 - Complete
Fiddly Dee Revenge by punkchick99 reviews
James Potter is going to pay. I swear on everything I know and love, that boy is going to pay. It's revenge time, baby.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,273 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 10/20/2008 - Published: 9/28/2008 - Lily Evans P., James P.
Last Wish by Hyper Blood Pixie reviews
Jasper killed Bella, Bella has another chance to make Edward love her, to finish her life. She has till her 18th birthday, or she is sent back to heaven, forever. Oh, and Then, there's Amber who will stop at nothing to make Edward her own. Full Sum. Insid
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 18,311 - Reviews: 254 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 10/12/2008 - Published: 8/12/2008 - Bella, Elizabeth
PS I Love You by DrowningxInxSapphire reviews
Bella sees Edward and Alice together. One night, someone unexpected shows up outside her window. Will 2 broken hearts learn to mend each others? JASPER/BELLA! Yaaay! R&R! Don't like Jasper and Bella? Then don't read it. Simple.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 13 - Words: 19,191 - Reviews: 732 - Favs: 543 - Follows: 286 - Updated: 9/28/2008 - Published: 8/6/2008 - Jasper, Bella - Complete
The Seduction of Edward by BlueBlood359 reviews
Alice gets a vision about Bella that leaves Edward stunned. Will he get what he has secretly wanted. Or will he be too stubborn to do something for himself for once. But when Alice tells Bella of her vision, Bella becomes determined to make it happen.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 13 - Words: 27,903 - Reviews: 911 - Favs: 1,260 - Follows: 474 - Updated: 9/22/2008 - Published: 3/30/2007 - Complete
The Cullen Family Chronicles by nomad of the north reviews
Chronicles of the Cullen Family's adventures, starting in 1933, leading up to the present. What happens when a NEW vampire is adopted? Focuses on each of the Cullens' stories and personalities, and how they all ended up in Forks, WA. LOTS of drama.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 28,676 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 9/18/2008 - Published: 7/22/2008
Major Jasper and Blackbird by Calendulam reviews
Bella talks in her sleep. Emmett gets an idea. Jasper/Bella bonding ensues.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,389 - Reviews: 391 - Favs: 1,191 - Follows: 178 - Published: 8/20/2008 - Jasper, Bella - Complete
History With Jasper by kentuckydreamer6 reviews
Its just an ordinary day in history class with Edward and Jasper,but what happens when the teacher insults the Confederate army?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,671 - Reviews: 176 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 8/18/2008 - Published: 6/16/2008
Obsession by JoonBug reviews
Mike has been obsessed with Bella since her arrival to Forks. He has tried to be patient and understanding, passing the time being a friend to Bella. Mike has finally snapped, will Edward be able to save her this time, or will his obsession be the death
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 23,872 - Reviews: 702 - Favs: 194 - Follows: 274 - Updated: 8/17/2008 - Published: 12/8/2007
When We Were Young by Fall Down Again Bella reviews
Edward and Bella have been friends since they were toddlers. When they grow older, will their friendship become something more? Stories from when they were little, through teen and adult years. Modern day. T for later chapters.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 46 - Words: 132,723 - Reviews: 5718 - Favs: 3,001 - Follows: 925 - Updated: 8/11/2008 - Published: 6/15/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Part One: Boogers, Part Two: FLushed New! by Vampire Crayons reviews
Part 1:An Emmett, Jasper and Bella incident. Part 2: A mood spoiler for Edward and Bella.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 787 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 8/3/2008 - Published: 6/22/2008
13 Things I've Never Done by Rosalie McCarty reviews
Sequel to How to Lose a Vampire in 10 Days. While playing a game the gang realizes that Edward and Bella have done hardly anything. So they are trying to expand their horizons by making them do thirteen things they've never done.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 25 - Words: 37,261 - Reviews: 928 - Favs: 221 - Follows: 177 - Updated: 8/3/2008 - Published: 5/14/2008 - Complete
Cows by Ein Kampf kann eine Lebenszeit reviews
Edward and Bella go on a road trip before their marriage. Bella finds something out about Edward that makes her laugh.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,416 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 6 - Published: 7/23/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
One In A Million by Cinnamint Kitty reviews
Edward left Bella, leaving her heartbroken. Soon after, she began to fall in love with her best friend. How will Jacob and Bella's romance turn out? And how will the pack react to Bella's shocking news? JxB: lemon eventually
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 31,979 - Reviews: 453 - Favs: 363 - Follows: 153 - Updated: 7/18/2008 - Published: 1/1/2008 - Jacob, Bella - Complete
Blush in a Box by A. Lincoln reviews
Bella conspires with members of the Cullen family to make Edward blush. It's all in the name of science, of course... and maybe just a little hormonal curiosity.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,067 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 7/15/2008 - Published: 7/2/2008 - Bella, Edward
My half Vampire and half Human life as it happens by missbella92 reviews
Liz is the offspring of Bella and Edward, she has a perfect life and a perfect home, but is also 50% vampire and might have troubles coping. When she and her best friend head to Port Angeles she finds the man of her dreams! Up for Adoption!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 24,814 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 7/3/2008 - Published: 3/21/2008 - Complete
Confederacy Victory by Tassel630 reviews
-All canon- "Edward beat Alice at chess, and then I played Jasper. He buried me." Bella, Eclipse, Page 57. Exactly how badly did Bella lose during that chess game?
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,243 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 7 - Published: 7/1/2008 - Jasper, Bella - Complete
Serendipity by muggleinlove reviews
Newly single Bella decides to give up on finding a relationship. Only to meet Edward. Edward is sick of meeting women that just want to sleep with him, and is looking for a serious relationship. What happens when there paths cross? All humans, normal pair
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 72,574 - Reviews: 2237 - Favs: 3,186 - Follows: 821 - Updated: 3/23/2008 - Published: 2/20/2008 - Complete
Hitched by Nollie Marie reviews
What happens here, doesn't ALWAYS stay here. It took Bella one cheating ex-boyfriend and a few drinks to find herself married to Edward Cullen, who is handsome, weathly, and isn't about to let her go that quite easily. Please R&R. /Slightly OOC?/
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 29 - Words: 65,289 - Reviews: 3552 - Favs: 4,582 - Follows: 1,258 - Updated: 3/16/2008 - Published: 11/16/2007 - Complete
Death Fairy by Says The Schizophrenic reviews
AU:Twilight There is two universes.Earth and Lunaris.Isabella is a Fairy who has to close the connection and Kill Aro Volturi. Edward is oblivious about magic.He is sad and angry. Will he help her? No flames. It will be worth your time! Promise! *On Hold*
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 16,015 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 96 - Updated: 1/25/2008 - Published: 9/23/2007 - Bella, Edward
Bella and the Beast by Elliptic Lullaby reviews
An AU version of 'Beauty and the Beast' featuring the 'Twilight' gang and their many misadventures. Read AN for full summary. Rated T to be safe. [EB]
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 57,592 - Reviews: 320 - Favs: 186 - Follows: 226 - Updated: 1/4/2008 - Published: 9/15/2006
Truth Or Dare by bleedingblackrosez reviews
what happens when Bella and the Cullens play truth or dare? chaos! my 1st fanfics ever, please PLEASE review!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,118 - Reviews: 452 - Favs: 357 - Follows: 314 - Updated: 9/27/2007 - Published: 8/31/2007
For Rent by me19 reviews
Thanks to Blaise Zabini, 26 year old Draco Malfoy has to pretend to be married to a Muggle-born witch in order to secure a business deal. Who's the best Muggle-born witch for the job? Why, Hermione Granger of course!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 77,846 - Reviews: 1126 - Favs: 784 - Follows: 513 - Updated: 9/7/2007 - Published: 1/4/2004 - Draco M., Hermione G.
101 Pick Up Lines by purtyinpink71121 reviews
This is a collection of the 101 pick up lines and clever asking outs that James used on Lily... and of course her smartass responses.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,947 - Reviews: 1135 - Favs: 1,607 - Follows: 260 - Updated: 12/24/2006 - Published: 12/17/2006 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
Parenting Class by IcyPanther reviews
Complete DHr & HG Sixth years at Hogwarts are now required to take a parenting class, what fun! Hermione, Draco, and Harry are paired up in which they'll trade off being children. Can they live through the class or will being a parent prove too hard?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 38 - Words: 207,405 - Reviews: 6177 - Favs: 4,589 - Follows: 970 - Updated: 9/15/2006 - Published: 9/19/2004 - Draco M., Hermione G. - Complete
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Men's Lust For A Woman: Edward and Jasper's Demise reviews
Man’s Lust for Woman, A story about Edward and Jasper’s lust for one woman, Bella. They both want her bad and they will do anything to get her. Even if it means learning to play the piano, even if it means pretending you’re gay…
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 12,490 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 12/13/2010 - Published: 4/30/2008 - Jasper, Edward
Life of a Suicide reviews
How does it feel to love somone, and not be loved back? Heart breaking? Painful? Jasper deals with it all. His unrequited love goes unreturned by the woman he loves...
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,556 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 5 - Published: 10/16/2008 - Jasper, Alice
Prewedding Jitters reviews
For yayme2012 and IsabellaMarieCullen3214's Quote Challenge. Bella wakes up in the morning and realises shes getting married. Every first time bride gets the jitters. Will Bella be any exception? One-shot.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 736 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Published: 7/1/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
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