onpermanenthaitus
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Joined 03-12-08, id: 1522919, Profile Updated: 07-22-11
Author has written 5 stories for Twilight.

a little bit about myself;

name: Nicole

Nickname: Nigel

Age: between 14-25

live: in Ontario, Canada

Oh The Irony

Rosalies dress in chpt 3

http://www.cynthia-styling.com/images/200706/1182796521338101823.jpg

copy and pastes

( there were way too many so I got rid of most of them...)

If you play operation and scream when the buzzer goes off copy and paste this into your profile!

If you are an amzing multi tasker copy and paste! (tehe, reading ff, writing ff, watching tv, playing x-box, listening to music, talking to friends, day dreaming, eating AND talking to my parents ;))

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. (only ALL THE TIME)

Even when you cant see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you don't have a myspace and you don't want a myspace, copy this into your profile.

If you always end up falling in love with people in books or movies that aren't the main character then copy and paste (Jasper and Seth and Damien and...)

If you love God with all your heart, and are not afraid to tell the world. and are 100 percent proud of it. copy this into your profile.

If you have an incredibly long profile that no one will read, copy and paste this into your profile

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

If you have ever cried when your favorite character in a movie, T.V show, or book died, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!

If you have ever stayed up for over 40 hours continuously just because you frickin' could, copy this into your profile.

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

Be a loser! Because being cool is so overrated!

It's always the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would I keep looking after I found it?

Tu madre! Yes, you just got burned in spanish. Would you like some ice for that spanish burn?

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.

Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures. Remember, when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, BUT it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and b--slap them upside the head.

When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back

music is like candy. you HAVE to throw the rappers out. End of story.

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean that they're not out to get you

~A day without sunshine is like...night.

~On the other hand, you have different fingers.

~The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.

~When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

~Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.

~Why do psychics have to ask your name?

~Just remember, if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you

Remember what you just said, because tomorrow I am going to have a witty and sarcastic comeback and you'll be devastated then!

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up

"I know water doesn't bite! What a stupid thing to say! Water doesn't have to bite you! You drown in it you moron!" -stewie griffin

A friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"

A friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "RUN, FORREST RUN!"

A friend wipes your tears when your rejected. A best friend goes up to him and says, "It's because your gay isn't it?""

A friend will always be like "well you deserve better". A best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days".

there are 3 men who need to get across a lake...

the 1st one prays to God asking for the strength to get across...

he gets big muscles and swims across...

but almost dies 5 times...

the 2nd 1 prays to God for the strength and the tools he needs to get across...

he gets his big muscles and boat and rows across...

but he almost dies 3 times...

the 3rd 1 prays to God, for the strength, tools, and the brains...

he turns into a woman...

walks 4 yards...

And crosses a bridge

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Edward Vs the Toddler by Butterscotch82 reviews
Ch.1: Edward faces his toughest--or at least, his most annoying--adversary yet, in the form of a two-year-old. Post Twilight . Ch. 2: Find out how Edward and Bella handle Nessie when she takes on some of Eddie's less charming traits. Post Breaking Dawn .
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,870 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 564 - Follows: 96 - Updated: 12/26/2012 - Published: 6/28/2007 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Twilight Spoof by BabyYoureMyOxygen reviews
One day, Alice decides to make a small spoof dedicated to their suddenly soap-opera resembled lives. How will it turn out when she sits the entire family down to watch it? With an embarrased Bella, a frustrated Edward, and a booming Emmett, the fun is endless for an entire laugh-filled night.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 5,302 - Reviews: 191 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 6/19/2010 - Published: 10/28/2008 - Alice - Complete
Blog of ONLY the Cullens by Shipper Friendly reviews
Carlisle starts a blog. This is the blog.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 33 - Words: 14,940 - Reviews: 716 - Favs: 161 - Follows: 113 - Updated: 6/1/2009 - Published: 10/9/2008 - Complete
Do Not Walk Gently Into The Night by Tiro reviews
Harry is sick of life, and writes his final letter… to Voldemort. However, Voldemort will not let the teen die. So what happens afterwards? Slash-fic.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,652 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 2,161 - Follows: 317 - Published: 5/18/2009 - Voldemort, Harry P. - Complete
Overcoming Fears by EllaAngel reviews
Bella has been a foster child since she was 5 yrs old and life has not been easy for her. After one particular instance, Bella becomes afraid of men and can not stand being touched by one, so when she moves in with the Cullens, what could become of her?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 9 - Words: 18,048 - Reviews: 221 - Favs: 129 - Follows: 217 - Updated: 3/15/2009 - Published: 4/18/2008 - Bella, Edward
All the Difference by Struck Upon a Star reviews
Pre-Twilight, in canon. Chapters alternate between APOV and JPOV. Fic handles lots of back story from before they met, but also includes their first meeting, their first three years together, and the beginning of their time with the Cullens.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 22 - Words: 54,198 - Reviews: 267 - Favs: 230 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 1/24/2009 - Published: 1/5/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
Rose Thorns by Lily Turtle reviews
Because sometimes, love hurts. Because it can challenge. Because it can turn on itself. Because love is a force and a superpower, and not an option. And because it will test Edward and Bella to their utmost limits. Even roses have thorns...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 50 - Words: 147,827 - Reviews: 1652 - Favs: 505 - Follows: 260 - Updated: 10/7/2008 - Published: 2/24/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
50 Pranks on Carlisle Cullen by Hauptmann Holmes reviews
The STORY version of 50 Ways to Annoy Carlisle Cullen. From Alice's POV. Hope you like it. Rated T for... strange things. COMPLETE!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 35 - Words: 14,595 - Reviews: 716 - Favs: 308 - Follows: 137 - Updated: 6/9/2008 - Published: 10/11/2007 - Complete
Tyler's Tricks by Child-Of-God13 reviews
Sequel to 'Impressing Bella.' Mike wasn't the only one who had his eyes on Bella...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,054 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 18 - Published: 4/26/2008 - Complete
Don't You Ever Leave Me Again by The Dark Lord Drama el Llama reviews
This was enough; kissing her hair, her neck, and occasionally her soft lips." My perspective on Jasper's feelings during and after Alice comes back from the near disaster that was Italy. AxJ. Rated T for slight Jasper angst. ONESHOT.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,276 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 13 - Published: 4/21/2008 - Jasper, Alice - Complete
Impressing Bella by Child-Of-God13 reviews
This is for Irish Froggy s Mike challenge. Mike tries to use his 'skills' to impress Bella. T for mild cussing. one shot
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 899 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 22 - Published: 3/28/2008 - Complete
Raining Hammers by little miss laugh alot x reviews
Third place winner in Irish Froggy's THE MIKE CHALLENGE. Mike has a plan to steal Bella's heart. One-Shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,629 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 11 - Published: 3/19/2008 - Complete
Home Improvement Cullen Style by hellopants reviews
This is what My-Bella and myself think would happen if The beloved Cullen's had to go to a home improvement store. Oh for the love of a toilet! what will we do with our dear sweet Emmett.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,518 - Reviews: 206 - Favs: 257 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 2/15/2008 - Published: 2/11/2008 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Uncovering the truth reviews
Bella was in an accident that leaves her with temporary amnesia.She remembers everything except what had happened to her. Full Summery inside! Rated M for safety and for reference to rape. All Human!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,246 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 7/6/2009 - Published: 3/5/2009 - Bella, Edward
The Mystical Cullen Diaries! reviews
Mwhahaha the cullens get online diaries! rated T because I have recently found out it is against my very being to write a child appropriate story, there is some swearing and suggestive themes. you've been warned... R and R please
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 10 - Words: 8,815 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 3/31/2009 - Published: 12/21/2008
Oh the Irony reviews
Rated T for cursing and slight suggestive themes... CHAPTER THREE 3 IS NOW UP! after a very very long wait itys up * thx to a new computer ; please r & r. **now partially edited
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 19,503 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 1/1/2009 - Published: 6/17/2008 - Complete
Randomness The Story reviews
please read!check out my other stories too!my poll too if you want princess twilight to continue.this story is only here because i wanted to tell you guys stuff but i hate just posting authors notes and i refuse to post 3 in a row. rated T. R and R please
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,002 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 11/27/2008 - Published: 9/29/2008
Princess Twilight reviews
Its the Princess Bride but with Twilight twist Please R&R! dont let the name fool you.... it will be good! T for minor language oh and all human except for jacob who cames back as a RAT! he-he mental image :p
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 11,348 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 8/22/2008 - Published: 4/18/2008