now for semoehtnig itnresitng...
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
If you could read that put it in your profile.
Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.
Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.
If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile
If you think that TWILGHT is the best book known to man...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think Edward Cullen is hot...copy and paste this onto your profile
If you are a Twilight fanatic put this on your profile.
If you are a Maximum Ride Fanatic, put this on your profile.
If you hope Stephanie Meyer comes out with even more books, put this on your profile.
If you are sad knowing that the Twilight series is coming to an end, put this on your profile.
If you hate these if questions, put this on your profile.
If you live every day to its fullest, put this on your profile.
If you love and I mean love to read, put this on your profile.
If you love writing fanfics put this on your profile.
If you would rather read, or be outside, rather than watching t.v, put this on your profile.
If you love music, put this on your profile.
If you are sick and tired of this, put this on your profile.
A good or best friend!
A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."
A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"
A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.
A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. A best friend will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"
A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you.
A good friend will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. A best friend will throw you a tampon and push you in.
A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"
A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.
A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome!
Let's do it again!"
Some say sex is better than chocolate, but is sex better then chocolate and peanut butter?
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute…screw the fruit
You never die a virgin, because in the end life FUCKS you up!
"Boys are like purses: cute, full of crap and can always be replaced"
"My best friends are the kind that if my house were on fire, they'd be roasting marsh mellows and flirting with the firemen,"
"Good friends will pick you up when your down, BEST FRIENDS will push you back down and laugh"
"Good friends ask why you're crying, BEST FRIENDS already have the shovel ready to bury the bastard that made you cry"
"I live in a world where unicorns eat rainbows and poop butterflies,"
"It takes 46 muscles to frown but only 4 to flip 'em the bird"
"Some see the glass half full, some see it half empty. Me? i just want to know who the hell is drinking my damn beer"
"I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed-reading accident. I hit a bookmark.
"A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking"
"A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read."
"A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice."
"I can resist everything except temptation."
"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes."
"I ain't sleeping. I'm just taking a good look at the insides of my eyelids."
"I forgot to remember"
"I forgot to wake up"
"Friendship is like peeing on yourself, everyone can see it but only you can feeli it"
"Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you."
"Love doesn't make the world go round, Love is what makes the ride worthwhile"
"Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love"
Do you believe there is a guardian angel standing next to you right now?
A conversation between a girl and her boyfriend:
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you think I'm pretty
Girl: Which would you chose me or you life?
Boy: my life
Girl: If I were to walk away would you cry?
Girl: I heard enough
As she turns to walk away her boyfriend grabs her and says:
I don't like you, I love you. You're not pretty, you're beautiful. I would chose my life because you ARE
my life and if you would walk away I wouldn't cry I would DIE!
Everything in this room is eatable. Even I am eatable, but that, children, is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies- Willy Wonka in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freakin' Trix, copy this into your profile.
Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile.
98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile.
92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your arse off.
If you think the Coa-coa Puff Turky-Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.
Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot,
who calls you back when you hang up on him,
who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat.
Or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy that kisses your forehead,
who keeps your picture in his wallet,
who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants,
who holds your hand in front of all his freinds,
who thinks your beautiful without makeup,
one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you,
THE one who turns to his friends and says THATS HER!
If he really exists, then WHY CAN'T I FIND HIM?
Did you know...
kissing is healthy.bananas are good for period pain.it's good to cry.chicken soup actually makes you feel better.94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.lying is actually unhealthy.you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.chocolate will make you feel better.most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.a good friend never judges.a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.boys aren't worth your tears.we all love surprises.Now... make a wish.Wish REALLY hard!!WISH WISH WISH WISH!! Your wish has just been received.
Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and Your wish will be granted
When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.
╚═╩═╩═╝Love vs. Sex
A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit
She ended up staying longer than
As she walked along under the tall elm
When she reached the alley, which was a
However, halfway down the alley she
She became uneasy and began to pray,
Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness
When she reached the end of the alley,
The following day, she read in the
Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and
Thanking the Lord for her safety and to
She felt she could recognize the man, so
The police asked her if she would be
She agreed and immediately pointed out
When the man was told he had been
The officer thanked Diane for her bravery
She asked if they would ask the man one
Diane was curious as to why he had not
When the policeman asked him, he
Amazingly, whether you believe or not,
Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly
Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?
If you love God with your whole heart and are 100 percent proud of it, copy & paste this in your profile
This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this:
What Makes 100? What does it mean to give MORE than 100? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100. How about achieving 103? What makes up 100 in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:
Is represented as:
AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.
"REMEMBER SOME PEOPLE ARE ALIVE SIMPLY BECAUSE IT IS ILLEGAL TO SHOOT THEM."
"BEFORE YOU CRITISIZE SOMEONE WALK A MILE IN THEIR SHOES, THAT WAY IF THEY GET MAD, THEYLL BE A MILE AWAY AND BAREFOOT."
"GIRLS GET PMS EVERY MONTH, BOYS GET ASSHOLE SYNDROME EVERY OTHER DAY."