Reaper96
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Joined 03-18-08, id: 1528073, Profile Updated: 10-10-09
Author has written 3 stories for Elder Scroll series, and Aliens/Predator.

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, “Common Sense,” who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

- knowing when to come in out of the rain;

- the early bird gets the worm;

- life isn’t always fair; and

- maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).


His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.


Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.


It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student, but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.


Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.


Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.


Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.


Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, “Truth” and “Trust,” by his wife, “Discretion,” by his daughter, “Responsibility,” and by his son, “Reason.”

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers – “I Know My Rights,” “I Want It Now,” “Someone Else Is To Blame,” and “I’m A Victim.”

Not many attended his funeral, because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

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Renegade by Peptuck reviews
The year: 2183. An attack on the Global Defense Initiative colony of Eden Prime threatens to ignite war between GDI and the Citadel, and only one woman can keep the peace, track down the attackers, and expose the true threat to the galaxy. Alt.Universe
Crossover - Command & Conquer & Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Drama/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 17 - Words: 164,661 - Reviews: 490 - Favs: 783 - Follows: 759 - Updated: 1/11 - Published: 3/28/2010 - Kane, Shepard (F)
I'm Not Asking for an Accomplice by Jester of Confusion reviews
Rachel has grown a bit in the last three months and now, with Alucard by her side, she must face the worse realm she has ever seen. High School. Who can handle it better? Vampire or Teen? Also, vampire training, a strange jumble mess of things, and war? Sequel to I'm Not Asking for Help. OC/A LATER IN STORY
Hellsing - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 27,656 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 8/21/2013 - Published: 5/8/2008
RaC Nightmares Series: Earth Bound by Emile The Watcher reviews
Follow Ratchet and Sasha as they raise their twins in the middle of a Galaxy threatening war, only to come out of that one and find that Earth has been busy building ships to attack Solona. Their crazy Leader Zen has declared Solona his for the taking, and all that stands in his way: Ratchet, and his family. Now the War has reached Earth, and the Nightmare has come full circle.
Ratchet and Clank - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 134,617 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 2/28/2013 - Published: 10/12/2009 - Ratchet, Sasha P. - Complete
Mass Effect: Iron Rebirth by Mashadar reviews
Killed in action, Shepard is deemed lost to all save those who run Project Lazarus. But when betrayal strikes well before the Project is near completion, only one option is left to save him. An experimental brain to machine transplant. The Iron Rebirth.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 140,180 - Reviews: 184 - Favs: 353 - Follows: 329 - Updated: 7/14/2012 - Published: 4/15/2010 - Shepard (M)
Tiberium Wars by Peptuck reviews
As Tiberium spreads across the Earth, the Global Defense Initiative finds itself facing a reforged and vengeful Brotherhood of Nod, and an even more mysterious, inhuman force that holds the secrets to the green crystal... A novelization of Tiberium Wars.
Command & Conquer - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 206,445 - Reviews: 466 - Favs: 523 - Follows: 404 - Updated: 4/19/2012 - Published: 7/13/2007 - GDI Commander, Kane
Progress by Andrew Joshua Talon reviews
MLP:FiM A thousand years is quite the generation gap, so Princess Luna decides she has to get with the times. However, this isn't quite as easy as she thinks it will be...
My Little Pony - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 28 - Words: 82,870 - Reviews: 731 - Favs: 706 - Follows: 560 - Updated: 2/6/2012 - Published: 5/11/2011 - Princess Luna/Nightmare Moon, Princess Celestia
Red vs Blue: The Spartan Rejects by Nuh reviews
AU fic. The Reds & Blues left their destroyed outpost to join Master Chief and Earth's forces to help finish the fight and save Tex and Junior from the evil AI O'Malley. However, things are not what they appear to be...
Halo - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 57,035 - Reviews: 213 - Favs: 163 - Follows: 159 - Updated: 1/4/2012 - Published: 10/10/2007
Sepia Tock: Adventures of the Ponyville Clockmaker by CanvasWolfDoll reviews
This is the story of Sepia Tock, or, as he's more commonly known as, 'Doctor Whoof'. He's not a big fan of this call of fame.
My Little Pony - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 24,237 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 76 - Updated: 9/20/2011 - Published: 8/23/2011 - Doctor Whooves - Complete
The Mark of Black by CaptainRandom reviews
Nightmares can be a terrible thing and, for Ratchet, they could be a prelude for things to come. Torment, confusion, a new friend and a terrifying new enemy. Warning: Graphic - Post Size Matters.
Ratchet and Clank - Rated: M - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 47 - Words: 78,522 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 3/6/2010 - Published: 11/26/2007
Cheater by Akimi Butterfly reviews
A certain heroine-to-be discovers the easy way to kill bandits.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 564 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/12/2010 - Complete
Windago by Rebecca Hb reviews
During the winter after Kanna leaves him, Pakku finds himself fighting for his life against an ancient evil of the Arctic North - the windago. Fortunately, there's an Earth Kingdom madman along to help.
Crossover - Doctor Who & Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,257 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 9 - Published: 10/23/2009 - 10th Doctor, Pakku - Complete
Integra's School Daze by Metropolis Kid reviews
A young Integra is forced to go to school. Things go from bad to worse when someone else decides to tag along. Poor Integra. Please let me know what you think. Thanks. AU- combines elements from the Anime and Manga. Second half co-written with Ladykirie.
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 29 - Words: 73,288 - Reviews: 494 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 8/2/2009 - Published: 10/10/2008 - Integra, Alucard - Complete
Merc For Hire by Metropolis Kid reviews
One-Shot. Still low on agents- following the events of Chapter 94 -the Vatican 'outsources' work to private mercenaries. But things are bound to get a little crazy with Deadpool on the job. Crack fic, but then... what isn't with Deadpool? Hope you enjoy.
Crossover - Hellsing & Deadpool - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,332 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 34 - Published: 8/2/2009 - Complete
I could change my life to better suit your mood by DuRiechstSoGut98 reviews
Layla Gallenus has stepped into the realm of Shivering Isles, unknown of what lies before her. Will she wither and go insane like the others, or will she prevail and find a reward at the end for her grievances?
Elder Scroll series - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 22,551 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 6/5/2009 - Published: 12/21/2007
Temptations by SanguinarianThorns reviews
A Hero. The Mask. Jack Of Blades. And of course, a choice that will change the fate of Albion. Oneshot! Reviews are much appreciated!
Fable - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 453 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/21/2009 - Jack of Blades, Chicken Chaser/The Hero of Oakvale - Complete
The Wrong Target by LordRevanMandaloreofZutara reviews
Zuko joins up with a bunch of mercs. They soon get a high profile target, only he manages to escape. Instead, Katara gets captured, and Zuko saves her. But why? Not for the reason you would think. Rated M, implied sex, rape, cursing, suggestive scenes.
Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,966 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 3/25/2009 - Published: 3/16/2009 - Zuko, Katara - Complete
Seeking the Incomplete by Marz1 reviews
A BTVS FMA crossover. To keep the balance on the hellmouth, the Powers that be prevent the Slayer from returning to life in this world...but the powers don't control every world.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 31 - Words: 145,959 - Reviews: 651 - Favs: 422 - Follows: 469 - Updated: 1/19/2009 - Published: 9/14/2006
I Hate This When it Happens by BigKwell reviews
ONE-SHOT. What happens when Seras wakes-up in a place she never expected - like the coroner's! Rated M for dark humor.
Hellsing - Rated: M - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,004 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/17/2008 - Seras - Complete
A Fair Trade by Azure Zangetsu reviews
Pip decided to help Seras with her daily training. It turned into a nightmare for him when Seras accidentally does something that we've all thought about and makes a trade with Pip to avoid having her brains turned into wallpaper. Oneshot, please review.
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,187 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 5 - Published: 11/6/2008 - Pip, Seras - Complete
Hellsing Fanfiction by Metropolis Kid reviews
The Reason why I have a gun, loaded with blessed silver bullets, tucked under my pillow. Just a silly, but hopefully humorous little story. Please Read and Review. Thanks. PS. PLEASE don't take too seriously.
Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,162 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 14 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Seras, Integra - Complete
The 'original' Appa Fanfic by Lunette Quintessence reviews
Did you notice there are no Appa fanfictions? I did. So I wrote one. Told from Appa's POV.
Avatar: Last Airbender - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,542 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 6/8/2005 - Published: 6/6/2005
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

LoveFAIL reviews
Suddenly Happening Interesting Things occur!
Elder Scroll series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 294 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Published: 11/14/2010 - Martin S.
Death Magnetic reviews
A doctor named Dex is trapped inside a hospital when an Alien Queen is born. The title has nothing to do with anything other then an Album from a popular band... Rated T for a good deal of violent goodness!
Aliens/Predator - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,689 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/2/2008 - Complete
Micheal Licher King Jr
A Group of younglings at the Arcane University learn about Micheal Licher King Jr. Hilarity ensues. Rated K for... Undead people.
Elder Scroll series - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 563 - Published: 7/29/2008 - Complete