Author has written 360 stories for Naruto, .hack/SIGN, Bleach, Maburaho, Dragon Ball Z, Code Geass, One Piece, D.Gray-Man, Star Wars, X-Men: Evolution, Familiar of Zero, Pokémon, Mass Effect, Halo, Hellsing, Batman Beyond, Dishonored, Batman, Ar tonelico series, Teen Titans, Soul Eater, Fairy Tail, Sekirei, Rosario + Vampire, Dragon Age, Sengoku Basara/戦国BASARA, Vocaloid, Toaru Majutsu no Index/とある魔術の禁書目録, Nurarihyon no Mago/ぬらりひょんの孫, Persona Series, Claymore, Kenichi the Mightiest Disciple, BioShock, Batman Begins/Dark Knight, Fable, World Only God Knows/神のみぞ知るセカイ, Witchblade, Sankarea/さんかれあ, Oz the Great and Powerful, Elder Scroll series, My Little Sister Can't Be This Cute/俺の妹がこんなに可愛いわけがない, Shingeki no Kyojin/進撃の巨人, Future Diary/未来日記, Panty & Stocking with Garterbelt/パンティ＆ストッキングwithガーターベルト, Avatar: Last Airbender, Frozen, Walking Dead, Dead Space, Maleficent, Monsters vs. Aliens, Freezing/フリージング, Legend of Korra, Beyond: Two Souls, Pacific Rim, White Knight Chronicles, Far Cry, God of War, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Gotham, Sword Art Online/ソードアート・オンライン, F.E.A.R., Shikabane Hime/屍姫, Ring/Ringu, Carrie, Dance In The Vampire Bund/ダンスインザヴァンパイアバンド, Big Hero 6, and Justice League.
Age: 25 (I'm getting old 0_0)
Name: Nope! Not Telling.
Hometown: The country where I reside.
Education: Working hard and trying to pay off my bills.
Status: Still Kicking...for now!
Greetings to the fine folk that moderate our site.
Myself, along with many, have been writing and posting on your fine site for years now, some of the better examples of up and coming writers out there are now suddenly finding some of the stories we've come to love at risk of being removed without the chance to even rectify our errors.
It's quite easy to simply add an MA rating, additional filters or even a simple requirement for a free membership to read the stories presented here, and would cut down on hateful anonymous reviews and posts at the same time, so I have to question as to why such a thing, in all this time, simply wasn't added.
If you're worried about falsification of a registration then have an appropriate disclaimer and then there can be no dispute, you took your steps and the PARENTS didn't monitor their children, if that is even your concern. If it is more of a personal view or desire then please at least let people know and give them a chance to remove a story that you and yours find offensive, most people on the site are actually rather cordial when it comes to such requests.
While I cannot say for sure if this letter will even reach those that may be willing to listen, of if it's more akin to a wide spectrum purge in preparation for something bigger, please understand that you are going to be looseing a LARGE number of your writers, and thus your income from a lack of readers if there is not some level of action taken to help with this situation.
For those that may agree with this, please feel free to sign on and send this to the support server, maybe we can get some movement on this.
Agato the Venom Host
The Dark Graven
Lord Orion Salazar Black
Kumo no Makoto
Korraganitar the NightShadow
Final Black Getsuga
Masane Amaha's King
Nero Angelo Sparda
S'up! I've written plenty of stories, but the current ones I'm focusing on are Beyond the Shadows, Whoever Brings the Night (FINALLY posted now that the site is fixed so read that if you like a good Dark NarutoxHarem fic!)Path of Peace, and, of course, Snowfall. Hard to believe I've been here for nearly five years now, started writing when I was only sixteen and now, I'm famous for some of my published works 0_0 Well, that's about it. I'll update whenever I get a chance, when work or classes aren't breathing down my neck, so, um...yeah. You'll see some pretty strange twists from my demented little mind, I can assure you of that. I guess some things really do get better with time, considering I've got a ton of stories now thanks all that darned creativity...
Hope ya like 'em, ya'll!
Now enjoy all this random stuff below.
Update 7/26/2011: All of you, be sure to read my newest fic, the Unleashing revised, and review! Whoever does gets a cookie! =D
Update 1/3/2012: The Girl in White has been revived at long last! Most of my fics should be receiving regular updates now, as should my latest and greatest fic "Happily Ever After"! Be sure to R&R =D
Here is a pic of Fem!Zetsu:
Current Character Profiles for the Aizen ficlet known as Shatter (As composed by Hinamori Momo)
Name: Aizen Sousuke
Age: Appears to be in his late teens
Rank:?? Undetermined. Possesses the ability to "Shatter", but I do not know what this means. (Further investigation required)
Human Birthplace: Unknown
Weight: ?? lbs
Eye Color: Mud brown
Hair Color: Brown
In sealed form, is represented by simple zanpaktou at hip.
Released Command: Shatter!
Effect: ?? Unknown.
Non-descript and nothing exceptional to note. Wears glasses, but is able to see without them at times, as evident when figthing hollows. Prefers to wear the glasses though.
Combat: He is very quiet most of the time deciding it best to observe weaknesses, then finishing the enemy with one strike. Non-combat: Subject is kind, caring even. Can be seen constantly playing with younger sibling Aina, taking care of often intoxicated elder sister Aina, or helping out around house. He is...a good person.
Gin Ichimaru, Kaname Tousen, Tatsuki Arisawa, Inoue Orihime, two twin girls whose names I do not yet know, and myself
Superior strength, and speed, and strange assistance in which his eyes sometimes change color. Cunning and ruthless strategist. Contrary to non-combat, once injured, target flies into a rage and attack power increases. Other strange powers continue to reveal themselves. (Further investigation required.)
May seem calm, but is inwardly conflicted over something. Is very protective of family members. May be potential weakness for an enemy to exploit in the future. He has often proffessed great concern for his friend's well being and will do anything to protect them.
Name: Ichimaru Gin
Age: Appears to be in his late teens
Human Birthplace: Unknown
Weight: ?? lbs
Eye Color: Red
Hair Color: Light purple
In sealed form, is represented by a short zanpaktou at hip.
Released Command: Impale!
Effect: ?? Unknown. Blade extends to great lengths and can be swung when extended
Tall and lanky, often has hands in pockets. Always smiling, always cheerful but there may be some deception behind it.
Combat: He is very agressive, charging in with no regard to his own safety. Non-combat: Subject is kind, caring even, although many crude comments irritate his friends. Can be seen constantly hitting on girls, despite many rejections. He is...Odd. Enjoys steak. Despises alchohol, yet enjoys sake.
Aizen Sousuke and family, Kaname Tousen, Tatsuki Arisawa, Inoue Orihime, two twin girls whose names I do not yet know, and myself.
Agile and limber. Can evade the swiftest strike, and strike, all the while mocking his prey.
Temper. Although he teases his friends, he himself has an abusive father, and as such becomes violent when family matters are mentioned. Mother has remarried and moved away. Has need to be with friends. Does not like to be alone. Smile's to cover up his problems.
Name: Kaname Tousen
Age: Appears to be in his late teens
Rank:?? Undetermined. Possesses sharp intellect, often used to outwit opponents.
Human Birthplace: Unknown
Weight: ?? lbs
Eye Color: ??
Hair Color: Black
In sealed form, is represented by simple zanpaktou at hip, with teardrop on hilt.
Released Command: Cry out!
Effect: ?? Unknown.
African. Appears to be blind, yet is very much aware of his surroundings, and is also able to distinguish colors. Perhaps he is faking his blindness?
Combat: He is very quiet most of the time deciding it best to observe weaknesses. Non-combat: Subject is kind, caring even, although he upholds a firm belief of right and wrong. Can be seen constantly reading mystery novels. Loves tea and prefers to eat lobster. Oddness level: 9. It is my belief that these three are very strange.
Aizen Sousuke and family, Gin Ichimaru, Tatsuki Arisawa, Inoue Orihime, Uryuu Ishida, two twin girls whose names I do not yet know, and myself
Resilience. Is capable of withstanding attacks that would kill most human and shinigami. Firm belief in justice, and refusal to succumb to evil of any sorts. Loyal to a fault and will even take both verbal and physical abusal for those he deems his friends.
May seem calm, but is inwardly conflicted over something. Is very protective of Ichimaru Gin, despite the latter's incessant teasing over his sexuality. Is currently/recently in a relationship with a girl, but has refused to disclose any details, other than the fact she is very precious to him.
If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven.
HEY THERE! I'm a writer, so I hope ya'll read and review my stories if ye should find them worthy. (bows again)
Favorite authors: Azteklord, Kuma in pink, and Kingkakashi, bubblemark, Jen, and EVERYONE WHO'S EVER SENT ME A POSITIVE REVIEW! THANK YA SO MUCH FOR THE ADVICE, SUGGESTIONS, AND THE REVIEWS! XD
My favorite Naruto pairings are:
NarutoxAnko(Its fun seeing these two hardheaded ninja in love!)
Put this on your
page if you love
Put this on your
page if you love
NaruxSaku (Every now and then, but RARELY, and its gotta be good.)
NarutoxAny Bleach girl (What Can I say? I love crossovers.)
NarutoxKarin (From Chibi Vampire)
NaruxShion (PERFECT COUPLE!)
LeexSakura (Hey she deserves a dedicated man and he's not that weird! He's just...very passionate about youth! VEEEEERY passionate... shudders)
NarutoxYugito (There's so few pairings of these two! They would be PERFECT together! I SHALL FIX THAT!)
NaruxAny other Naruto girl!
FemNarutoxItachi (Thanx to Dark for filling me in on this pairing!)
Favorite Dbz Pairing:
Favorite Maburaho Pairing:
KazukixRin! (These two would be so CUTE together!)
My favorite bleach pairings:
Ichigox any bleach girl!
IMPORTANT: I REAAAAALLLY NEED CO-WRITERS AND BETA READERS! WHOEVER WANTS TO HELP, FEEL FREE TO PM ME ABOUT IT!
100 Rules of Anime
The laws of Anime is a growing list of physical, universal, and natural
phenomenon that seem to appear in various forms in all sorts of anime. The original
intent was an effort to classify these incidents into a list of "laws" that
explained how Anime physics are different from our own (real?) world. It is our hope
that you find them useful to studying Anime, or at the very least, worth a good
#1 - Law of Metaphysical Irregularity- The normal laws of physics do not apply.
#2 - Law of Differential Gravitation- Whenever someone or something jumps, is
thrown, or otherwise is rendered airborne, gravity is reduced by a factor of 4.
Some things have been known to "Float" for a few seconds before plummeting to hit
the ground, vehicle, or someone’s cranium.
#3 - Law of Sonic Amplification, First Law of Anime Acoustics- In space, loud
sounds, like explosions, are even louder because there is no air to get in the way.
#4 - Law of Constant Thrust, First Law of Anime Motion- In space, constant thrust
equals constant velocity.
#5 - Law of Mechanical Mobility, Second Law of Anime Motion- The larger a
mechanical device is, the faster it moves, Armoured Mecha are the fastest objects
known to human science.
#6 - Law of Temporal Variability- Time is not a constant. Time stops for the hero
whenever he does something "cool" or "impressive". Time slows down when friends and
lovers are being killed and speeds up whenever there is a fight.
#7 - First Law of Temporal Mortality- "Good Guys" and "Bad Guys" both die in one of
two ways - either so quick they don’t even see it coming, OR it’s a long drawn out
affair where the character gains much insight to the workings of society, human
existence or why the toast always lands butter side down. NOTE: Sometimes, Anime
heroes or villains never really die! In these rare cases they were a clone or cyborg
and the real hero/villain’s suspiciously missing in "Malletspace", or something.
#8 - Second Law of Temporal Mortality- It takes some time for bad guys to die...
regardless of physical damage. Even when the "Bad Guys" are killed so quickly they
don’t even see it coming, it takes them a while to realize they are dead. This is
attributed to the belief that being evil damages the Reality Lobe of the brain.
#9 - Law of Dramatic Emphasis- Scenes involving extreme amounts of action are
depicted with either still frames or black screens with a slash of bright color
(usually red or white).
#10- Law of Dramatic Multiplicity- Scenes that only happen once, for instance, a
"Good Guy" kicks the "Bad Guy" in the face, are seen at least 3 times from 3
#11- Law of Inherent Combustibility- Everything explodes. Everything.
First Corollary- Anything that explodes bulges first.
Second Corollary- Large cities are the most explosive substances known to
human science. Tokyo in particular seems to be the most unstable of these cities,
sometimes referred to as "The Matchstick City".
#12- Law of Phlogistatic Emission- Nearly all things emit light from fatal wounds.
#13- Law of Energetic Emission- There is always an energy build up (commonly
referred to as an energy "bulge") before Mecha or space craft weapons fire. Because
of the explosive qualities of weapons, it is believed that this is related to the
Law of Inherent Combustibility.
#14- Law of Inverse Lethal Magnitude- The destructive potential of any
object/organism is inversely proportional to its mass.
First Corollary- Small and cute will always overcome big and ugly. Also
known as the A-Ko phenomenon.
#15- Law of Inexhaustibility- No one EVER runs out of ammunition. That is of
course unless they are cornered, out-numbered, out-classed, and unconscious.
#16- Laws of Inverse Accuracy- The accuracy of a "Good Guy" when operating any form
of firearm increases as the difficulty of the shot increases. The accuracy of the
"Bad Guys" when operating firearms decreases when the difficulty of the shot
decreases. (Also known as the Stormtrooper Effect) Example: A "Good Guy" in a
drunken stupor being held upside down from a moving vehicle will always hit, and
several battalions of "Bad Guys" firing on a "Good Guy" standing alone in the middle
of an open field will always miss.
First Corollary- The more "Bad Guys" there are, the less likely they will
hit anyone or do any real damage.
Second Corollary- Whenever a "Good Guy" is faced with insurmountable odds,
the "Bad Guys" line up in neat rows, allowing the hero to take them all out with a
single burst of automatic fire and then escape.
Third Corollary- Whenever a "Good Guy" is actually hit by enemy fire, it is
in a designated "Good Guy Area", usually a flesh wound in the shoulder or arm,
which restricts the "Good Guy" from doing anything more strenuous than driving,
firing weaponry, using melee weapons, operating heavy machinery, or doing complex
martial arts maneuvers.
Fourth Corollary- The more times the "Bad Guy" fires, the fewer times he
#17- Law of Transient Romantic Unreliability- Minimei is a bimbo. (Note: The
Minority Opposition in Ohio disagrees and thinks all men who like this stuff needs
to get out more.)
#18- Law of Hemoglobin Capacity- the human body contains over 12 gallons of blood,
sometimes more, under high pressure.
#19- Law of Demonic Consistency- Demons and other supernatural creatures have at
least three eyes, loads of fangs, tend to be yellow-green or brown, but black is not
unknown, and can only be hurt by bladed weapons. Also, acid has been known to work
just as well...
#20- Law of Militaristic Unreliability- Huge galaxy-wide armadas, entire armies, and
large war machines full of cruel, heartless, bloodthirsty warriors can be stopped
and defeated with a single insignificant example of a caring/loving emotion or a
First Corollary- Whenever a single war machine (mecha, starship, etc.) goes
up against an entire army, the army always loses.
#21- Law of Tactical Unreliability- Tactical geniuses aren’t...
#22 -Law of Inconsequential Undetectability- People never notice the little
things... like missing body parts, or wounds the size of Seattle.
#23- Law of Juvenile Intellectuality- Children are smarter than adults. And almost
twice as annoying.
#24- Law of Americanthromorphism- Americans in Anime appear in one of two roles,
either as a really nasty skinny "Bad Guy" or a big stupid "Good Guy".
First Corollary- The only people who are more stupid than the big dumb
Americans are the American translators. (Sometimes referred to as the Green Line
Second Corollary- The only people who are more stupid than the American
translators are the American editors and censors.
Third Corollary- Canadians are usually portrayed as smart, strong, handsome
#25- Law of Mandibular Proportionality- The size of a person’s mouth is directly
proportional to the volume at which they are speaking or eating.
#26- Law of Feline Mutation- Any half-cat/half-human mutation will invariably:
1) be female.
2) will possess ears and sometimes a tail as a genetic mutation.
3) wear as little clothing as possible, if any.
#27- Law of Conservation of Firepower- Any powerful weapon capable of
destroying/defeating an opponent in a single shot will invariably be reserved and
used as a last resort.
#28- Law of Technological User-Benevolence- The formal training required to operate
a spaceship or mecha is inversely proportional to its complexity.
#29- Law of Melee Luminescence- Any being displaying extremely high levels of
martial arts prowess and/or violent emotions emits light in the form of a glowing
aura. This aura is usually blue for "Good Guys" and red for "Bad Guys". This is
attributed to Good being higher in the electromagnetic spectrum than Evil.
#30- Law of Non-Anthropomorphic Antagonism- All ugly, non-humanoid alien races are
hostile, and usually hell-bent on destroying humanity for some obscure reason.
#31- Law of Follicular Chromatic Variability- Any color in the visible spectrum is
considered a natural hair color. This color can change without warning or
#32- Law of Follicular Permanence- Hair in anime is pretty much indestructible, and
can resist any amount of meteorological conditions, energy emissions, physical
abuse, or explosive effects and still look perfect. The only way to hurt someone’s
hair is the same way you deal with demons... with bladed weapons!
#34- Law of Probable Attire- Clothing in anime follows certain predictable
guidelines: Female characters wear as little clothing as possible, regardless of
whether it is socially or meteorologically appropriate. Any female with an excessive
amount of clothing will invariably have her clothes ripped to shreds or torn off
somehow. If there is no opportunity to tear off aforementioned female’s clothes,
then she will inexplicably take a shower for no apparent reason (also known as the
Gratuitous Shower Scene). Whenever there is a headwind, Male characters invariably
wear long cloaks that don’t hamper movement and billow out dramatically behind them.
First Corollary (Cryo-Adaptability)- All anime characters are resistant to
extremely cold temperatures, and do not need to wear heavy or warm clothing in snow.
Second Corollary (Indecent Invulnerability)- Bikinis render the wearer
invulnerable to any form of damage.
Third Corollary (Probable Attire permanence)- The clothing on the hero is
indestructible. Their capes, robes, (and if they are girls,) skirts, dresses, bows,
or any loose clothing will just flap when they are in the middle of a fire or ice
attack... Unless it's a hentai. It is believed that the clothes are made out of
Anime Character hair. (re. Laws 32 & 48)
#35- Law of Musical Omnipotence- Any character capable of musical talent (singing,
playing an instrument, etc. Is automatically capable of doing much more "simple"
things, like piloting mecha, fighting crime, stopping an intergalactic war, and so
on... especially if they’ve never attempted these things before.
#36- Law of Quintupular Agglutination- Also called "The Five-man Rule", when "Good
Guys" group together, it tends to be in groups of five. There are five basic
positions, which are:
1) The Hero/Leader
2) His Girlfriend
3) His Best Friend/Rival
4) A Hulking Brute
5) A Dwarf/Kid
Between these basic positions are distributed several attributes, which include:
1) Extreme Coolness
2) Amazing Intelligence
3) Incredible Irritation
#37- Law of Extradimensional Capacitance- All anime females have an
extrasdimensional storage space of variable volume somewhere on their person from
which they can instantly retrieve any object at a moment’s notice. This mysterious
dimension is commonly called "Malletspace".
First Corollary (AKA The Hammer Rule)- The most common item stored is a
heavy mallet, costumes/uniforms, power suits/armor, and large bazookas.
#38- Law of Hydrostatic Emission- Eyes tend to be rather large in Anime. This is
because they contain several gallons of water, which may be instantaneously released
at high pressure through large tear ducts. The actual volume of water contained in
the eyes is unknown, as there is no evidence to suggest that these reservoirs are
actually capable of running out. The reason water tends to collect in the eyes is
because Anime characters only have one large sweat gland, which is located at the
back of the head. When extremely stressed , embarrassed, or worried, this sweat
gland exudes a single but very large drop of sebaceous fluid.
#39- Law of Inverse Attraction- Success at finding suitable mates is inversely
proportionate to how desperately you want to be successful. The more you want, the
less you get and vice-versa.
First Corollary- Unfortunately, this law seems to apply to Otaku in the real
#40- Law of Nasal Sanguination- When sexually aroused, males in Anime don’t get
erections, they get nosebleeds. No one’s sure why this is, though... the current
theory suggests that larger eyes means smaller sinuses and thinner sinus tissue (see
Law #38 above). Females don’t get nosebleeds, but invariably get one heck of a blush
along the cheeks and across the nose, suggesting a lot of bloodflow to that region.
#41- Law of Xylolaceration- Wooden or bamboo swords are just as sharp as metal
swords, if not sharper.
#42- Law of Juvenile Omnipotence- Always send a boy to do a man’s job. He’ll get it
done in half the time and twice the angst.
#43- Law of Triscaquadrodecophobia- There is no Law #43.
#44- Law of Nominative Clamovocation- the likelihood of success and damage done by a
martial arts attack is directly proportional to the volume at which the full name of
the attack is announced (known as the Kamehameha effect).
#45- Law of Uninteruptable Metamorphosis- Regardless of how long or involved the
transformation sequence or how many times they’ve seen it before, any "Bad Guys"
witnessing a mecha/hero/heroine transforming are too stunned to do anything to
#46- Law of Flimsy Incognition- Simply changing into a costume or wearing a teensy
mask can make you utterly unrecognizable to even your closest friends and relatives.
#47- Law of Mandibular Combustible Emission- All anime characters seem to have some
unknown chemical on their breath that reacts VERY violently with extremely hot or
spicy food. This chemical may also be responsible for the phenomenon of fire behind
the eyes and from the mouth when a character (usually a female) is really angry.
#48- Law of Electrical and Combustible Survivalism- If you get electrocuted or
burned, YOU WILL SURVIVE!! Though your entire body will be scorched, seconds later,
your skin won’t have a trace of damage (Also known as the "Pikachu Effect").
First Corollary- When a magical bad guy/Alien/monster fires off a flame,
wind, or ice attack, the resulting effect is only enough for the hero(es)/heroine(s)
to be standing in the "Walking Against the Wind" stance, with his/her eyes shut and
letting out a pathetic "Aaaaagh!", and yet they are never harmed. This may be in
part to laws 32, 34 and sometimes 44.
#49- Law of Female wrath- If a male character insults a female character, he will
get a mallet, shotgun, or tank blast, or if she is a character that can perform
magical feats, a fireball or whatever, to the head, body or whatever (Also known as
the "Lina Inverse/Gourry Factor") This is because he always deserves it, and will
help him to cope in today’s society. (>Sniff Sniff
#50- Law of Artistic Perversion- Most (not all) Anime artists are perverts and are
under the impression that girls are willing to tear off their clothes, or wear VERY
small, revealing outfits at the drop of a pin (or pen for that matter).
Unfortunately, most Hentai fans are under the same impression.
#51- Law of Uninteruptable Nominative Clamovocation- This law is a mixture of Laws
44 and 45. Regardless of how long or involved the Spell or projectile attack is, and
the likelihood of success and damage done by the volume at which the full name of
the attack is announced, or how many times they’ve seen it before, any "Bad Guys"
witnessing a hero/heroine quoting the incantations for an extremely powerful attack
are too stunned to do anything to interrupt it. (Also known as the "Dragon Slave
52- Law of Telepathic Obliviousness- Most of the time, some Anime characters
(usually males) will think personal (Like that he/she has sabotaged something), or
perverted thoughts, while near some other character, WHO’S TELEPATHIC!! The reasons
for this are:
1) They forgot that the person is telepathic.
2) They just don’t give a damn.
The reasons the telepathic person doesn’t react are:
1) They’re preoccupied with doing something else.
2) They’d rather keep the fact to themselves that they are Telepathic.
3) They just don’t give a damn.
#53- Law of Chromatic Diversity- Air can be any color of the viewable spectrum.
#54- Law of Old Man Comic Relief- Comic relief comes in the form of a short, bald,
wise-mouthed dirty old man or alien. Or the combination of any two of those traits.
First Corollary- If old man is present, and is acting too horny, stupid,
etc., there will invariably be an old woman to whap him over the head with a frying
pan or something.
#55- Law of the Wise Old Man- Little old Japanese men always know how it ends and
withhold the ending from anyone, especially the hero. This includes special power
weapons, ancient relics, and people who know everything.
#56- Law of Omnipotent Unreliability- Any "Bad Guy" with Omnipotent powers/weapons
will never use those powers/weapons against the "Good Guy" until it is too late.
First Corollary- All "Bad Guys" suffer from Antagonistic Boasting Syndrome
which require all "Bad Guys" to threaten with or exemplify their prowess and not use
it against the "Good Guy".
Second Corollary- No "Bad Guy" may use any new, secret, or superior military
device without one of the following events occurring:
a) The control device being broken.
The control device being taken by the "Good Guy".
c) The control device is in fact not the real device at all and was just
"fooled" by the "Good Guy".
d) The "Bad Guy" has already lost and cannot use the device.
#57- Law of Minimum Corneal Volume- Eyeballs may make up no less than one sixth of
the face’s total surface area. More so if the case is a blonde woman.
#58- Law of Electrical Charges in Hair- Hair attracts electricity in abundance,
resulting in two outcomes:
a) A positive charge will result in the spikes-flying-everywhere-behind-me
A negative charge will result in the
#59- Law of Ammunition Accuracy- When there are multiple types of ammunition
available (paintballs, speaker pods), non-lethal rounds will always be more accurate
when compared to "standard" or lethal shots. (Macross Plus for paintballs, Macross 7
for speaker pods)
#60- Law of Active Female Attraction- In a comedy series, a male character’s
attractiveness to women is inversely proportional to how active they pursue them.
(Tenchi, Ranma, and Makoto OVA have a seemingly endless supply of willing
girlfriends despite their lack of romantic skill while Happosai, Ataru, and Carrot
couldn’t get a date despite or because of their constant attempts.)
#61- Law of Sweat Pore Variability- When a person is embarrassed, caught in an
awkward situation, or otherwise humiliated, all sweat pores on the body contract,
except for ones on the forehead. These pores expand to such a degree that a single
drop could fill a Big Gulp from 7-11.
#62- The Law of Inverse Training Time- A person who has been training for 3 years
is never as good as someone who has been training for one month.
#63- Law of Needs to Few and Many- The needs of the many, outweigh the needs of the
few... of even the one.
#64- Law of Bad Humor- Whenever someone says something that is intended to be
funny, whether actually funny or not, the rest of the characters (even animals) fall
to the ground with their feet in the air. Sweat sometimes accompanies the fall.
(The sound of a cow mooing usually accompanies the joke as well.)
#65- Law of Extreme Anger- Whenever a female character gets mad, such as seeing the
male character with another girl, she becomes extremely strong (despite her usually
helpless look) so that she can lift a 1000 ton object to hurt the guy. She can
sometimes perform other punishments that are just as cruel such as pinching the
guy’s face so hard that it changes shape. (see law #49)
#66- Law of Differentiated Gravitation-
First Corollary- If the airborne entity exceeds an altitude equal or greater
than two times the height of the entity, gravity is decreased by an inverse
coefficient relative to the upward momentum and mass/weight (if within at least
500 km of any gravity source) of the entity "jumping".
Second Corollary- The amount of Newtonian "opposite force" (in accordance to
normal downward velocity; "Earth gravity" speed is equal to 32ft/sec/sec) is also
inversely proportional to the "actual" speed of the airborne entity. In all
actuality, an entity that appears to be flying towards a solid concrete parking lot
from space will actually land, producing an opposite force of approximately 1.73 lb.
of pressure. Unless this particular entity is a "Bad Guy". Then the law exhibits a
mysterious exponentially proportional Newtonian opposite force, thusly increasing
this variable by a factor equal to the inverse-gravity potential.
#67- Law of Conservation of Ambient Dramatic Tension- In any situation where the
Ambient Dramatic Tension increases, the "Good Guy’s" Style Coefficient must be
increased by a proportional amount to compensate. In any situation where this does
not happen, the "Bad Guy" inevitably comes out on top. However, this usually leads
to a further rise in the Ambient Dramatic tension, which will always be offset by
an exponential increase in the "Good Guy’s" Style Coefficient.
#68- Law of Coercive Vehicular Control- No matter how complex or well defined the
control system, a character controlling a vehicle of any sort always does so through
means of undetectable subconscious psychokinesis.
First Corollary- Characters can perform actions with their vehicles which
clearly defy normal physics (see Laws of Metaphysical Irregularity and Constant
Thrust). The velocity, attitude and traction of the vehicle appear to be adjusted at
will, with the degree of absolute control being proportional to the complexity and
lethality of the maneuver.
Second Corollary- It is effectively impossible to remove characters from or
disrupt the passage of their vehicles without the character’s consent. This does not
always apply to "Bad Guy" characters, or "Good Guy" characters in situations where
the Ambient Dramatic Tension could increase in accordance with the Law of
Conservation of Ambient Dramatic Tension.
#69- Amendment to the Law of Conservation of Ambient Dramatic Tension- In any
situation where the Ambient Dramatic Tension increases without a corresponding
increase in the "Good Guy’s" Style Coefficient, not only does the "Bad Guy" usually
come out on top, but also his Smugness Factor increases in proportion to the rise in
Ambient Dramatic Tension.
#70- Law of The Rushing Background Effect- Whenever something dramatic occurs, a
survival instinct engages, thus rendering all incoming stimulus that is not directly
and immediately to the dramatic situation at hand a meaningless blur. This is often
referred to as "The Rushing Background Effect". Due to the increase in brain
activity and adrenaline levels in the bloodstream, the scene is often played out in
#71- Law of Interdimensional Hammers- Whenever a female character witnesses a male
character of her preference performing any sort of questionable act (i.e. Looking at
another girl or anything she might construe as perverted) she can reach into an
interdimensional realm (usually behind her back) and withdraw a huge Anime Mallet of
Doom with which to whack the said male over the head with. (see Laws # 37, 49, and
#72- Law of Instant Band-Aids- Whenever a character is injured (usually in a head
shot, maybe from a mallet whack) Band-Aids will always instantly appear on the
wounded individual (and always in pairs, set in a cross fashion). These bandages
will then, most likely, disappear by the character’s next scene.
#73- Law of Universal Edge Defense- Any projectile attack, from a blast of magic to
a hail of bullets, can be easily defended against by holding a suitably cool-looking
sword or other bladed weapon between the attacker and defender, usually so that the
edge cuts into the incoming attack(s), causing both halves to go flying harmlessly
past the defender. Observed most often in fantasy and martial arts anime.
#74- Law of Intractable Sanity- There is no such thing as insanity in anime. When
faced with horrifying supernatural forces that would drive most men mad, anime
characters will either:
a) Die quickly (but in accordance with all other laws e.g., slowdown and
Get possessed by them, especially if they are beautiful girls or men in a
position to ravish beautiful girls, or
c) Kill them, wipe the blood off their blades, and walk on whistling.
#75- Law of Celestial Body Control- At a dramatically correct moment, a hero can
summon a sun/moon/halo to appear behind him/her to cause a dramatic silhouette.
#76- Law of Aura of Forgetfulness- Any hero who wishes his/her identity to remain a
secret will invariably succeed regardless of disguise because everyone around
him/her will forget everything. Otherwise, how does Sailor Moon keep her disguise?
#77- Law of Cool Hair Factor- The hair of a hero will always coalesce into thick
strands that drape his face into a dramatic fashion, regardless of wind, the
elements, etc. (see Laws 32 & 48)
#78- Law of Inverse Coping- Any single event will happen to the ONE character LEAST
capable of dealing with it.
#79- Law of Martial Arts Training Invulnerability- The Myth that certain martial
arts will enable you to become so strong, that you can stop a nuclear warhead with
your bare palm. Unfortunately, for most otaku, they found the hard way that it just
doesn’t work in real life...
#80- Law of Stereotype Captain characteristics- If a captain of any type of ship is
male, he will invariably wear a big captain’s cap, a long overcoat, and have a
shaggy beard and mustache (pipe optional), and be a great tactician. If the captain
is female, however, she will invariably be young, well endowed, and ditzy as a pole
(horny father optional). Yet, she too will be a great tactician.
#81- Law of Shades/Coolness Factor- Shades can make you instantly cool, even if
you’re normally a klutz.
#82- Law of Hentai Plot- The proper response to any change in the plotline of a
Hentai anime is to start having sex.
#83- Law of Understatement- Anything that is deemed too impossible will become
First Corollary- Any "Bad Guy" stating "T-that’s impossible!" whenever the
hero is accomplishing some new feat/move/projectile will find out too late that he
is wrong and will invariably be toastied.
#84- Law of Dormant Powers- Anytime a hero is somehow outpowered and/or outclassed
by the villain, he will invariably release powers/new moves he never knew he could
accomplish... but his old teacher did!
#85- Law of Style Coefficient- In a situation where a Good guy may be in dire
straits, he will become stronger, smarter and more cool in a matter of seconds. (see
Laws #67, 69, and 84)
#86- Law of Bad Guy Smugness Factor- Whenever the villain actually succeeds in
beating the hero, they will begin to gloat uncontrollably, because they’ve never won
against the "Good Guy" (because they’re Eeeviiil!!). They usually get so cocky, they
tie the hero to a conveyor belt leading to his doom and leave to get a snack.
Usually this results in:
a) The hero escaping.
Clean-up for the underlings.
c) The villain getting toastied.
#87- Law of Tableware Nonexistence- There IS no spoon.
#88- Law of Goofy Turn-Ons- In Hentai, ordinary , pedestrian objects sometimes have
the magical power of either inducing orgasm or arousal. Some include warm water,
rolling on a smooth tabletop, wind, mild electrocution, the character toweling
themselves after a bath/shower, and very cold objects... like bottles of 7-up.
#89- Law of Penile Variance- All Anime men in Hentai have a ridiculously large
penis (lengths of 8, 9, 10 and 11 inches are most common). Some even have ones the
size of telephone poles, despite the blood loss that would accompany it...
#90-Law of Hentai Female Characteristics- All Hentai women have the following
1) Very sensitive and/or very large breasts with large nipples.
2) Very tight and/or sensitive vaginas.
#91- Law of Vaginal Variance- Hentai Anime women can take penis lengths of 8" and
up... completely... despite the fact that they might have a tight and/or sensitive
#92- Law of Hero Identification- All heroes are introduced by way of appearance
while someone talking about their (in)famous-ness, or by way of a voice-over of them
#93- Law of Cute Mascots- Any anime either Shojo or Shonen has GOT to have at
least one cute, furry little mascot by penalty of death!
First Corollary- If it is a Shonen Anime, the hero will be accompanied by a
Dog, Cat or any kind of animal, real or fake, that would be found with a hero of the
male persuasion. Any animal that would be associated with girls that is following
him around is there because:
1) It’s his girlfriend’s.
2) It is following him, despite his insistence not to do so.
3) Chicks will dig him more.
Second Corollary- If it is a Shojo Anime, the heroine will be accompanied by
a cat, cute lil’ mouse, or some disgustingly cute monster, or any kind of animal,
real or fake, that would be found with a hero of the female persuasion. Any animal
that would be associated with guys that is following her around is there because:
1) It’s her boyfriend’s.
2) It is following her, despite her insistence not to do so.
3) It makes her look cool.
#94- Law of The Force- Most Anime heroes are blessed with a unique sort of ability
that enables bad things to happen to those that deserve it or makes things like
bullets or debris totally miss them (Also referred to as "Dumb Luck"), even though
they are mostly unaware of it. Those who have this ability include Vash the
Stampede, Captain Justy Ueki Tylor, and Jar Jar Binks.
#95- Law of Naughty Tentacles- All Anime Tentacles are VERY horny and will rape any
human female, regardless of age ("She’s 18! No! Really, she is! I’m not lying!...")
First Corollary- Even when raped or molested by tentacles, Hentai Anime
girls eventually get into it & begin squealing in ecstasy. NO one knows WHY this is,
but some theorize there may be some kind of chemical that is secreted through the
skin of the tentacle...
Second Corollary- Women who are impregnated by a tentacle creature never
experience morning sickness, and also find it to be intensely pleasurable (Also
known as the Goofy Meter Redline Effect).
Third Corollary- Similarly, the resulting... offspring of tentacle/human
relations is immediately sexually active, often impregnating its own mother again.
#96- Law of Cat-Fighting- Two females with a grudge can and will go at each other,
sometimes ripping off clothes. Sometimes it escalates so much, that property damage
begins to occur.
First Corollary- A running fight can be so destructive, you can follow it
from a distance just by watching for the smoke. (Also known as the "A-ko/B-ko
#97- Law of Healing- Most anime heroes have a Wolverine-like healing factor that
enables them to regenerate from a massive wound or broken bone within minutes. Being
immortal sometimes helps. (Also known as the "Priss Effect".)
#98- Law of Stereotype Crew Characteristics- All ships, either waterborne or
spaceborne, have the following crew members:
1) The captain
2) His Lieutenant
3) Various female technical staff
4) A hotshot pilot
5) A cute little girl/twins (either stowaways or not)
6) The Doctor
7) The Doctor’s assistant (either a spy or not)
Weighted among the crew are various quirks which include:
1) Extreme coolness/luck
2) Amazing Intelligence
3) Incredible irritation
4) Extreme cuteness
5) Irresponsible drunkenness
7) Emotionless (Idiots.)
#99- Law of Sparklies- Whenever a character of the main character’s interest
appears, flowers, sparkles, or abstract circles of pastel colors appear around said
character, or both. Roses with exaggerated thorns appear when it is dangerous love.
No one knows why this is, though most have a theory: Anime characters are freaks! At
least, Marker Apenname seems to think so...
#100- Law of Anime Events- Much like wrestling, anything and everything can happen.
The previous was created by Insane Advocate and his two friends. Aswell as various internet sources inorder to help others understand the things that happen in anime. So to help others understand anime affter you have read this please copy and paste this to your profile thank-you.
Interesting discoveries on Demon Foxes
I did not make this up. I read it online. In many books, demon foxes have appeared as females. Verfoy rarely do they appear as male. Usually, the case being that the female demon fox falls in love with a human. Through many conflicts, such as freuding families, wars, and prestige. The love is unable to progress. Later, they escape to a safe territory. Afterwards, procreation proceeds. The point being, this should offer enough justification that the Kyuubi can or IS female. To you yaoi lovers out there, I will not disrespect your opinion, but I myself hate guyXguy and it just litterly makes me sick.
Continuing from where I left off before. Not just in books, but female demon foxes have also appeared in asian history. Both Chinese and Japanese culture have them appearing and courting with young males of various social rank. With the Japanese, female demon foxes have even gone one step further. Where the Chinese demon foxes have failed, Japanese demon foxes have succeeded. They've been formally accepted as part of the Japanese culture. This is something that is worthy of praise.
They've been an important aspect of culture and is often, if not always seen as females. I hope that serves as a backup for the "is Kyuubi a female?" argument. I also believe that this cements the fundation that most of the future Kyuubi stories that, others will write, so I hope other that this for fanfiction writers does clear some things up well enough for you, and that Kyuubi will be dipicted as a female rather than male
this is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Lucillia
Y BOIZ SHOULDN'T CHEAT
There was once a girl named Ashley who
Jack was the most popular guy in school.
Courtney, ASHLEY, and Emma. Jack
liked Courtney. Courtney liked jack also.
Ashley and Courtney were worst enemies.
Courtney tried to
everytime she had a chance to. One day,
go to the movies. Ashley heard
Ashley approached the movies that night
Ashley sat right behind them. she
kiss...not only kiss, but practically get it
on in the
told jack "Do you want to come to my
replied "hell yes."
Ashley had peeked through Courtney's
around and Ashley watched the whole
The next day at school Ashley wasn't
wasn't there. A week later her mother
found her in
commited suicide because she had loved
body was a note.
A note that read: My dearest Jack, I
Courtney's house and I will continue to
do something like this to me. I really
for you just
like Jesus died for us.
Always with you, Ashley
Please foward this or Ashley will
you and try
to kill you because she wants everyone to
And another thing: Aside from Naruki, Hina, Deiga, and Chaos, whom I created, I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING, other than my own anime that I came up with, and am working on.
I am also working on my own anime, Tales (or chronicles) of Elementia, and I own all said characters. You'll see some of them: Magus, Haruhi, Pyrus, Infernus, Tesa, Asoi, Sei and others, in my NaruxHina fic: New Guy: Naruto Uzumaki!
I get inspiration for MY stories by reading the masterpieces that are posted on this AWESOME site! Some of my stories may seem similar to others, and the storyline will often be twisted any way I please, but I NEVER take anyone's storyline! I just like trying new ideas, and trust me...I've got plenty of em!
I instead put an Entirely NEW spinoff of the original instead, and add or subtract characters while adding as much humor, romance and anything else i possibly can! Oh and I've been at this for at least a year now, so I AINT A ROOKIE! I do know what I am doing here!! HOWEVER, I WOULD GREATLY APPRECIATE ANY IDEAS OR SUGGESTIONS THAT ANY,(AND YES I MEAN ANY!) OF YOU WISH TO OFFER!
And another thing! I tend to tweak the original characters sometimes, the story lines, and the personalities of said characters. For example in my first fic, I made Naruto, Tsunade and Orchimaru are all the same age and they are in Naruto's time line, not Tsunade's. I'm sorry if that angers some of you, but that gives me more room to write and improve! I am also a fan of both Bleach, Karin, Dbz, and Inuyasha, so there WILL BE PLENTY OF CROSSOVERS! So for those of you who don't like mixes...BLEH! I have PLENTY of stories in the works, and i do NOT intend to stop until i finish em!
And for those of you who think I'll just leave a story alone at a pivotal point... DON'T WORRY! I WON'T LEAVE YA HANGING AS I KNOW THE FEELING ALL TOO WELL! I've already written a bunch of Naruto stories,and i hope that whoever reads them enjoys them to their fullest! if you want me to write a story OF YOUR CHOOSING, (as long as its not yaoi, (shudders) and its about: Naruto, Dbz, Bleach, Inuyasha, MAR, or Dot Hack) THEN DROP ME A LINE AND I'LL BE HAPPY TO WRITE IT! OH & ONE MORE THING... NARUTO RULES AND SASUKE DROOOOOOOLS! (JK! THEY ARE EQUAL!)
IF YOU WANT TO SEE SOME REALLY COOL, AND PRETTY FUNNY NARUTO PICS, GO TO THIS ADDRESS
AND BAD FLAMES WILL BE IGNORED! SO DON'T EVEN TRY IT! Piss of all ya, "Holier than thou" assholes, I will write how I please, and I never plagiarize!
GO TO THIS LINK 4 A COOL NARUTO PIC I FOUND, and it'll be Naruto's and Sakura's outfits for I Love You:
Go to this web address to see what Hina looks like in Guardian.http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=RPOSPtgaCr4&feature=PlayList&p=CAF07E59BDA7DCC2&index=42
Oh, and if ya'll want to listen to some KICK ASS music, while reading this, to really get into the story, or if you just want to listen, check out my profile: Neoszangetsu on YOUTUBE!
If you have ever bitch-slapped a snob PROUDLY put this on your profile
If you have insanely annoying siblings copy and paste this on your profile
If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile ( Sometimes i do some times i don't...)
If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventalated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile
If you love Naruto so much you wish the characters were real so you coud be one of them, copy and paste this on your profile
If you have ever had an arguent with yourself and LOST, copy and paste this on you profile.
If you want to smack the living daylights out of Sasuke for leaving Sakura copy an paste this on your profile!
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking copy and paste this on your profile
If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes copy this on your profile
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this on your profile
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it copy this on your profile
If you have ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head against a desk for no reason copy this on your profile
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the conversation copy this on your profile
If you hate those mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites, copy and paste this on your profile
If you have been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing copy this on your profile
If you have ever crashed into a wall while sugar high copy and paste this on your profile
If you have ever tried to make plans for world domination put this on your profile
If you, with no warning, laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, copy this on your profile
If you have ever thrown something at a TV screen when you saw a character you despised, copy and paste this on your profile
If your profile is long, copy this onto it to make it even longer
If you have ever copy and pasted something copy and paste this onto your profile
If you have ever dreamed about being an Anime Character, copy and paste this into your profile
If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear beating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc. then copy this into your profile!
If you avoid teen fads and don't live your life according to others copy and paste this
Favorite anime sayings:
BELIEVE IT! (Naruto Uzumaki)
You don't have enough hate. (Itachi Uchiha)
Let's see. My first impression: I hate you - (Kakashi Hatake)
Too troublesome. (Shikamaru Nara)
You're annoying- (Sasuke Uchiha)
Love wins!- (Sakura Haruno)
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, watching-waiting-wishing, 100-percent-Harry-Potter-obsessed, iluvdavidwright45, dianeandnumairareahotcouple,windsoftiti, Ilovethelittletacos...Ilovethemgood, i-have-issues-deal-with-it, Kiba Obsessed Demonic Angel, Digital98, Anime-Kunoichi,Chinbaldo,Naruto Ninja44,May and Dawn are the best, rst64tlc,NeonZangetsu
If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
92 percent of American teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their asses off at the others.
If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, Shifter-youkai ChOpstIcKsXOXO, RadicalEd57, Fierygirl0, tsukiko3000,Neonzangetsu
If you're addicted to anime,copy & paste this into your profile.
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile
If the opposite of 'pro' is 'con', then what's the opposite of 'progress'?
We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police
I'm not littering...I'm donating to the Earth.
Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.
I am not a humanitarian. I am a hell-raiser.
Heck is the place for people who don't believe in Gosh.
I'm not a complete idiot... Some parts are missing.
The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.
They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every-time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?
Sarcasm is one more service I offer. Compassion costs extra.
Insanity is a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.
I will temporarily rule the world, forever.
Life is like robbing a bank; so worth the while!
You want to know who your real friends are? Screw up and see who's still there- (A good one!!)
Let's see. My first impression: I hate you - Kakashi (Naruto)
Don't tell me the sky's the limit, when there's footprints on the moon-
Don't look at me with that tone of voice!-
Silence is golden, duck-tape is sliver-
Too troublesome - Shikamaru (Naruto)
It's a wonder they haven't locked you up yet-
A good friend would come and bail you out of jail. A true friend would be sitting there beside you saying, "Man that was fun! Let's do it again!"
Question: if some one with multiple personalities threatens to commit to kill himself is it considered a hostage situation??
Who ever said that anything was possible has obviously never tried to ski through a revolving door...
He shouldn't let his mind wander, it's too little to go out on its own
He had a good idea once, but it died of loneliness
"Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable" -Unknown
-"Fiction is a lie and good fiction is the truth inside the lie" -Unknown
Genius by Birth
Lazy by Choice
Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
You've gotta die in creative ways.
They keep saying the right person will come along; I think mine got hit by a
truck. Then the truck backed up and ran them over again.
If it's not nailed down, it's fair game.
To err is human, to forgive is not Company Policy
When in doubt, use brute force. When that doesn't work...RUN LIKE HELL!
Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.
If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
If you are feeling good, don't worry. You'll get over it.
Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.
Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.
I haven't lost my mind -- it's backed up on tape somewhere.
You can't fall off the floor, but you can always pick yourself back up.
Anything can be made to work if you fiddle with it long enough.
If you mess with anything long enough, it'll break.
Push something hard enough and it will fall.
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. (I Live by
this one XD)
There's no point in being grownup if you can't be childish sometimes!
I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.
Had this been an actual emergency, we would have fled in terror and you
wouldn't have been notified.
Tomorrow will be canceled due to lack of interest.
Schizophrenia beats being alone.
Why is it that when adults have multiple personalities it's schizophrenia,
but when a child has imaginary friends it's cute?
Do what comes naturally now. Seethe and fume and throw a tantrum
Sleep: A completely inadequate substitute for caffeine
The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first
given opportunity (It's true I tell you!)
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all the evidence that you tried.
Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view